Two Hearts

by Lepord257

Rating: teen
Tags: Discord, Derpy Hooves, Crossover, Doctor Whooves, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Romance, Adventure
Length: 6731

With the Doctor stranded in an alein universe of magic all is not well. A villain twice defeated is back again and seems to know him. And who is the mysterious gray pegasus who claims to know him?

It was a normal day for the Doctor when it all started. A Dalek spaceship, near death experiences every five minutes, the usual. That all changes when a slip up ends with him falling through a tear in time and space while regenerating. Now he's trapped in an alien universe full of magic and...ponies. First time for everything right? Now a villain twice defeated is back for an encore and knows a lot about the last Time Lord for a creature who spends the majority of his time trapped in stone. Maybe it has something to do with the gray pegasus who seems to know exactly who he is.

I rated this teen for the more dark themes. Also, this takes place during season 2, just to clear up any confusions regarding the best villain ever. Thanks to my friend Rolona for the awesome cover art. Go check her out on Deviant Art!

Published 2013-01-26 18:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-15 21:47:49 UTC

Prolouge

It has long been acknowledged that Time Lords should never travel alone. They need a companion- an assistant- to keep them company throughout the long days and nights that make up a Time Lord’s existence. But, more importantly, they need someone to remind them who they are, who they need to be, and, if necessary, to stop them from doing something they would surely regret.

Then there was the Time War. All of the Time Lords were destroyed. All except one. It became even more important not to go alone after that; but the traveler couldn’t bring himself to take anyone on board the TARDIS. He couldn’t stand to lose anyone else because of something he’d done. Eventually it was just him. Alone in his big empty machine full of rooms and corridors that he still hadn’t fully explored, even after a thousand years. Alone in the big emptiness of space, further than anyone had ever gone. Alone with the tick of the universe. And slowly, he slipped into madness.

* * *

The Doctor was running. Sooner or later, he always ended up running. Of course, it never started that way. First he tried talking. He was good at talking. Maybe too good. He'd been told it was what got him into trouble. As he reflected on his past adventures he realized that that was more true than anyone could possibly know.

The Doctor was jerked back into reality by a laser missing his head by a hair. A nanosecond later it was followed by several more and just as many cries of "Exterminate!" The Doctor swore under his breath and put on an extra burst of speed. Spotting a corner he stuck his hand out to catch at the wall and turned it so fast he almost slide baseball style. Unfortunately several Daleks had beaten him there.

If they weren't so deadly they would have looked ridiculous as they vaguely resembled upside-down trash cans and each with a toilet plunger arm and one stubby cage like arm that fired lasers. Their eyes were blue cameras and were placed on the end of long metal poles that could swivel 360 degrees.

They looked far from laughable when they shot beams of death straight at him. Reacting immediately thanks to reflexes honed over one thousand plus years, the Doctor ducked and turned tail without missing a beat. He ducked around corners at random; sometimes there were Daleks lying in wait and sometimes there weren't. It took several minutes before the Doctor realized something that anyone not running purely on alderine and instinct would have noticed immediately: He was being herded towards the front of the ship. That in itself was bad news. Daleks were killing machines and acted accordingly. Only four Daleks (that the Doctor knew of anyway) could put together a plan more complex than tour the universe and shoot anything that moves, and he had destroyed all of them. However, there was another reason the Doctor had a terrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. The front of the ship was where the command deck was located in Dalek ships. It didn't need to be as no one needed to look out window to fly a Spaceship. Viewing screens and computers eliminated the need for a windshield in a spaceship. In a regular ship putting the command deck at the front is unnecessary but in a battleship it's just poor planning. It makes the deck an easy target for enemy attacks, or it would if anything could get past the Dalek forces the ships were host too. There was even a mammoth bay window that the Doctor suspected was there specifically to taunt would-be strike teams, the alternative being enjoying the view of planets burning. He wouldn't put either one past them. Ordinarily the Doctor would be trying to get there and the Daleks would be attempting to stop him. The fact they were guiding him there was worrying. With his luck there would be an entire battalion waiting for him. Unfortunately, if he tried to go anywhere else the Daleks wouldn't hesitate to fire.

The corridor the Doctor was racing down ended in a pair of double doors that looked perfect for crashing through, so he did and found himself exactly where he knew he would end up: The control room. To his surprise the room held only three of his lifelong foes, all of whom were focused on their tasks at their respective stations. He stood there awkwardly for a moment; he wasn't used to being ignored and certainly not by them.

"Well?" He asked. "You've got me here. I'm right where you want me." As he spoke he strode around the spacious room. Maneuvering himself so that he was standing directly in front of one of the Daleks he demanded without a hint of fear in his voice, "So why haven't you killed me?" The Dalek looked at him blankly for a moment (or it would have if it was capable of facial expressions) before turning back to its work. The Doctor swallowed his anger at being brushed off so easily and spun around to begin wandering about again. "You had plenty of opportunities and yet here I am. So what are you afraid of?"

This invoked a response. One of the Daleks turned towards the Doctor and told him in the robotic voice characteristic of its species, "We have other orders."

This news startled the Doctor into taking a sudden step back. "What other orders? Orders from who?" Ordinarily, their orders consisted of "destroy every living organism" and "kill the Doctor". "Who told you not to kill me?"

"You did." Another half step backwards.

"We both know you'd never take orders from me so you can go ahead and tell me the truth. Why spend so much time and effort bringing me here if you aren't going to kill me?"

As if in answer a voice was broadcast over the intercom. "Three minutes to impact."

Impact? They were in deep space, light years away from anything to crash into. The Doctor whirled around to look out of the massive bay window and gaped at what he saw. "What the-" The Doctor had encountered cracks in time before. One of his companions grew up with a crack in her bedroom wall, only it wasn't in her wall at all. It was a crack in the fabric of time and space. What he was looking at wasn't like that at all. It was a tear. Something big had to have happened to cause this, and he could only imagine what. What could have possibly happened to rip open a hole in creation like this ragged streak of nothing?

Turning around had been a mistake. He didn't notice the energy bolt until it was tearing through him and by then it was much too late. The Doctor collapsed onto the floor in a heap, agony tearing him apart from the inside out. His hand began to glow with golden smoke and he shook his head to clear it. Not now, not now, gotta get back to the TARDIS. He grit his teeth, pulled himself up, and stumbled towards the doors. One foot in front of another, the Doctor retraced his steps painfully slowly. His mind barely registered the countdown that was being broadcast over the entire ship. Two minutes to impact. One minute. At thirty seconds he had reached the bright blue phone box that what his TARDIS. Ten seconds and he was inside. The Doctor locked the doors behind him with fumbling fingers as the clock hit zero.

There was a blinding flash of white and the terrible agony that he had learned to associate with regeneration. The regeneration process was familiar to him now and he welcomed it, knowing it would stop the pain. When the golden smoke cleared he knew something was wrong. It wasn't that the TARDIS seemed to be plummeting towards an unknown planet, moon, or star at an incredibly high rate of speed, although that was deeply concerning. He himself was off somehow. This feeling was strengthened when he attempted to stand. His center of balance was way off and he fell forward. The Doctor flung out his arms to break his fall but as soon as he saw the appendages in question he could only think one thing: Why do I have hooves?

Author's Note

Here we go! This is not m first attempt at a fanfiction but it is my best one. I've been meaning to post it for a while an I've finaly done it!

Chapter One

Vwhoom, vwhoom

A big blue box was hurtling through the skies of Ponyville, changing direction, spinning around, and sending its residents into a panic. Ponies were running every which way, unsure of what to do. Only two ponies were paying no attention to the phenomenon and both resided in the library. A certain unicorn was receiving a visitor from the future, and that visitor just happened to be her.

“Twilight please! I have a very important message for you from the future!”

“You’re from the future?”

“That’s right, but you have to listen.” Twilight wasn’t listening. She was pacing around her unusual visitor, taking in every detail from her burned out mane to her tattered black suit.

“What happened to you? The future must be awful.”

“Please, I don’t have much time," the other Twilight begged.

“Is there some sort of epic pony war in the distant future or something?”

“Actually, I’m from next tuesday morning, but that’s not important right now-”

Kaboom!

The entire building shook as both versions of Twilight Sparkle (resident and visitor) screamed in unison, "What was that?!"

They heard the front door being shoved open and slammed against the wall and then heavy hoof steps ascending the stairs. They were undoubtedly the hoof steps of a grown pony, but they were uneven and staggering, like the one wasn't quite used to legs. When the pony in question appeared at the top of the stairs, all of the rooms occupants were surprised to see that the colt before them looked more beat up than the visitor. He had chestnut fur and a mane that stood on end and was quite frazzled and signed. His bright blue eyes were wild and he wore a tweed jacket that would make Rarity squeal in horror. It clearly wasn't made for a pony as it and the shirt under it were much too big and bulky for anypony to wear, even if they weren't torn and burned beyond repair. A large red bow tie hung undone around his neck and doubtless would have made a statement of some kind or another if it was properly done. The oddest thing about the pony however, was the object he held in his mouth. Whatever it was, it clearly had not designed to be held in such as fashion. It was a long metal cylinder composed of three separate parts with a "cage" on one end encasing a green bulb.

"No! No, no, no, no, no!" the crazy stallion mumbled around the device. "Bad pony. Bad pony messing with time travel! You do not go back in your personal timeline. Any amateur knows that."

"The scroll never said anything like that-"

"You're lucky you didn't cause a tear in time and space," the strange pony scolded. "I only fix those once every thousand years and you are late by several hundred!"

The stallion's ill fitting jacket slipped for a fraction of a second revealing the strangest cutie mark the Twilight’s had ever seen. On the stranger’s flank was an hourglass. The future Twilight saw it and gasped, "You're a-" but before she could finish, strands of magic swirled around her and she vanished in a bright flash of light. Twilight allowed time for herself and the stranger to blink the spots from their eyes before she turned on him angrily.

"She was going to tell me something!" she cried accusingly.

"That's even worse. Whatever it was will no doubt work itself out on its own. We're just lucky I got here before something too bad happened." The stallion stumbled and Twilight stepped forward, ready to catch him of he fell, but he waved her away. "I'm fine, I'm fine. I just need-" He broke off mid sentence to exhale a cloud of golden smoke. Twilight's eyes went wide with alarm. "some sleep," he finished. The stallion's legs gave way and he crumpled to the floor fast asleep.

* * *

When the Doctor awoke it was early evening. He sat up groggily and surveyed his surroundings. He was on a couch in the middle of an apartment that was entirely made of wood; bookshelves claimed most every wall. A quick glance out the glass door leading to the balcony confirmed his suspicions: The apartment was carved out of a tree. He could hear voices originating from what he guessed was the kitchen, although they were too quiet to make out properly.

The Doctor attempted to stand but his efforts were rewarded with a face full of floor. In addition to the normal balance issues that came with the regeneration, he had become tangled in his clothes. The kitchen door was flung open and a remarkable purple unicorn cantered over to him.

"Are you alright?" she asked worriedly.

"I'm fine, just a bit... stuck."

The unicorn sighed and, with considerable difficulty, helped him to stand. "There." The unicorn gave the Doctor a once over as he did the same. It seemed that she was just as confused by him as he was by her. Finally, she spoke. "We'd better get you out of that suit." Noting the look on his face, she added quickly, "It's much too big for you. It doesn't even look like it was made for a pony! You'll only fall over again."

The Doctor looked uncomfortable but agreed. It would be easier to run without tripping on a ruined jacket anyway, he thought.

The unicorn set out about helping the Doctor undress. The uncomfortable silence was broken only by directions on how to lift a leg or move his head. The awkwardness was almost palpable. The unnamed unicorn finally broke the silence. "This suit has an odd design. It's almost as if it wasn't made for a pony. Where did you get it?"

The Doctor hesitated for a moment before answering. Wherever he was, it wasn't in his universe. Finally, he decided on the truth. "London."

"London? I've never heard of the place. Is it anywhere near Trottingham?"

"...Trottingham?"

"Well, yeah. I just assumed... You have the accent." The unicorn was beginning to regret bringing it up in the first place.

The Doctor jumped at the suggestion. "Trottingham! Yes. Definitely from Trottingham." He laughed nervously. "If you don't mind me asking, where am I, miss...?"

To the Doctor's relief, she didn't seem surprised by this question. "Twilight. Twilight Sparkle. And you're in Ponyville: the home of-" she paused for a second. "Of me." she finished lamely. "Although, we do have a decent library. It's no Canterlot Archives, but it's got a good selection."

The Doctor froze with a leg in the air. "Did you say Camelot?" he asked, before topping over.

Twilight helped him up and replied, "No, Canterlot," stressing the "t". "What's a camel?"

"Never mind." It was beginning to occur to the stallion that things were going on that were very much not good. And not a normal not good either.

At long last, he had managed to disentangle himself from his clothing. The Doctor made as if to go but was stopped by Twilight. "Oh no. You are going nowhere until you explain everything you said yesterday, why there is a smoking blue box outside my house, and why you keep staring at my horn." She forced herself to smile. "Would you like some waffles?"

* * *

They had hardly sat down to breakfast when there was a knock at the door. Twilight told Spike to stay put and got up to get the door. (The Doctor eyed the baby dragon nervously. Twilight however, acted as if a fire breathing lizard eating waffles was the most natural thing in the world. Perhaps it was.) Both dragon and pony strained to hear what was being said.

"Hello Derpy. What can I do for you?"

The reply made everyone on the street wince. "WHERE IS HE!?!"

"Where is-" There was a strangled yelp and several bangs and crashes. "Derpy wait." Crash. "Derpy-" Thump. "Derpy!"

The kitchen door was flung open and a gray pegasus with a yellow mane and tail burst in. She crashed into the table launching waffles across the room. Twilight appeared in the doorway behind her as Spike was knocked to the ground. The Doctor had somehow remained unscathed and sitting on his stool a midst the carnage. The pegasus' crossed eyes fixed on him immediately. She let out an excited shout of, "Doctor!" and leapt at him, tackling him to the floor with a bear hug. "Oh Doctor, I missed you so much! Why didn't you tell me you were back in town? Why is your TARDIS crashed in front of the library? Why-"

"Can't- breathe," he managed to choke.

"Oh sorry," the pegasus said sheepishly, and sat next to the stallion. "I was just so excited to see you."

The Doctor heaved himself to his hooves as Twilight and Spike set about clearing up the mess Derpy had made. "You know each other?" Twilight asked.

"Yes."

"No,” they spoke at the same time.

"Huh?"

The Doctor coughed politely. "Not yet." He shot the pegasus an apologetic glance. "Sorry."

Derpy looked close to tears. "Doctor, what are you talking about? I'm your companion! I have the key to the TARDIS and everything!

"I'm sorry, Depry was it? None of that's happened to me yet."

"Could either of you talk normally?" Twilight asked, exasperated. "Neither of you are making any sense. What's a TARDIS? You promised me answers!"

"On the contrary my dear Sparkle, I promised you nothing. Thank you for your hospitality, but I really must be going." He nodded to each mare in turn- angry unicorn and forlorn pegasus. He made a mental note to apologize to the walleyed mare when he met her. He had more pressing matters on his hands- hooves, whatever, than dealing with his future. Things like- he paused for a moment as he descended the stairs. He was forgetting something. Something big. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to remember. There was a Dalek ship, he knew that much. But after that... He shook his head to clear it and continued. Maybe there were clues in the TARDIS.

He had to push his way through a crowd of pastel ponies and several guards in golden armor to get to his beloved TARDIS that had managed to embed itself in the street. "Oh no," he groaned. The ship's exterior was unharmed as it always was, but smoke curled up from the doors and the windows were fogged up with it. The bulb at the top was out and the light behind the words "police box" were off.

"Sir," sounded a deep a voice from behind him. The Doctor turned to see one of the guard ponies. "Please get back. For your own safety."

The Doctor thought about arguing but didn't have the energy. It wouldn't do him any good if he won anyway. The TARDIS would be locked to anything and everything until it had repaired itself.

He wondered for a moment about what to do next. For better or worse, the decision was taken out of his hooves by a single shout. "Doctor! Come quick!"

Author's Note

I think I'm the only person ever to have fannart before I post the story. Having friends rocks.

Chapter Three

Well after the last echo had faded they stood in stunned silence, all of them waiting for someone else to break it. Derpy was the first. "Doctor, what do we do now?"

"We have to figure out the riddle. Where's someplace that ponies can't go?"

Everypony thought for a moment. "The ocean?" Twilight suggested.

"The moon?" Pinkie Pie added.

"That's a good start. Now tell me about Discord. What's he like? Where would he hide them?"

"Somewhere we could find." All eyes turned to Twilight. "It's just that last time it was in the most obvious place. He enjoyed beating us more than actually winning."

The Doctor grinned at the purple unicorn. "Excellent, Twilight. So we can get them we just can't get to them. That rules out any oceans and moons."

"And puts us right back where we started," Applejack pointed out.

"Correct."

"What we don't know is where he's capable of putting them. Depending on how much power it took for Discord to break free his powers could be limited." Derpy smile proudly as the mane six stared at her.

"You've done this before," the Doctor told her.

"Well duh. I'm your companion, remember?"

"Um, yes. So where was this chaos god held?"

"In the garden," Celestia told the Doctor. Twilight will show you. Everypony else, come with me. I have something special I need you to take care of."

"Yes Princes," they all chorused.

As Twilight came to a halt in front of the empty stone pedestal she asked, "So what exactly are we looking for?"

"Anything unusual," the Doctor replied. "Derpy, have you seen my sonic screwdriver?"

"Right here Doctor." The gray pegasus cheerfully tossed the screwdriver to the Doctor while Twilight tried to figure out where she'd been keeping it. She had just decided that some things were better left a mystery when there was a surprised shout from the hourglass stallion.

"Gah!"

"Doctor! Are you OK?" Derpy asked in full on panic mode.

"I'm fine, it just surprised me." He glared down at the smoking screwdriver on the grass. "It sparked. In my mouth."

"Ouch."

"Yes. I wonder..." He trailed off as he bent closer to the smoking device. Derpy let her eyes wander around the garden, one eye taking in every detail and the other fixed on the Doctor. "Was every statue here once a living creature?"

"Pardon?"

"If one statue was alive what if they all are? Maybe all of them are secretly living things and if we make the wrong move they'll come alive again and attack us!"

"I don't really think that's likely," Twilight said reassuringly. "And even if it were true I'm sure we're perfectly safe."

"Oh undoubtedly," the Doctor told the two mares. "It looks like only Discord was strong enough to break free from his prison, and that was just by chance. If I'm correct, and I always am," he cantered over to the pedestal, sniffed the air, and licked one of the stone fragments. "Temporal waves. Well, more like ripples actually."

"Temporal ripples?" Twilight asked. "What could have caused that?" Out of the corner of her eye she caught Derpy looking at the Doctor with a somewhat dreamy expression and filed it away in her mind for later. It was always good to notice small details.

"You remember how I said that I got to you before anything too bad happened?"

"Yes."

"I was wrong."

"Oh."

The Doctor galloped around the pedestal still talking a mile a minute. "As far as I can tell, Discord was held in some sort of quantum lock, removed from time with a thin stone casing around him. When you traveled back in time it caused ripples in the fabric of time and space. Normally this wouldn't be too big of a deal, but the ripples disturbed the quantum lock and he was able to break free."

The Doctor turned to look at the ponies and found them frozen with rather blank looks on their faces. He smiled and waited for them to say something. They didn't. He frowned slightly and looked around him. Everything had frozen. The wind, the birds, the branches of the trees. Nothing moved. "Discord!" He called.

"I was wondering when you'd notice. I know ponies are partial to missing the obvious, but you? Tisk tisk."

"What do you want?"

"Isn't it just typical?" Discord continued, totally ignoring him. "Having to clean up the mess that someone else made. You certainly would never have made such an idiotic mistake."

"Whatever you're doing, stop it."

"Stop what? All I'm doing is saying what you're thinking."

"I'd never think something as ridiculous as that."

"Whatever you say Time Lord, but I think you and I both know the truth. Toodleoo Doctor!" Discord grinned and vanished with a pop.

"Discord! That isn't true and you know it! Discord!"

"Um, Doctor? Are you OK?" The stallion turned around to see the wall-eyed mare and the purple unicorn looking at him worriedly.

"Er, yes. Perfectly fine."

"If you're sure..." Derpy's voice trailed off and it was clear that she didn't believe him at all. The Doctor felt an odd sensation in the pit of his stomach as Twilight's purple gaze turned ever so deliberately from him to the pedestal that Discord once stood upon.

"So you didn't get there in time to stop me from disturbing the time stream, and the resulting temporal waves set Discord free."

"Correct."

"What exactly does that tell us about his capabilities? Did the strain weaken him or was it effortless?"

"I'd need to know more about Discord to be sure. Do you have any records about him?"

"There might be some in the royal archives. However, they will most likely be difficult to find. I lived here for most of my life and I don't recall seeing anything about him."

"It's a risk we'll have to take. Lead the way miss Sparkle."

"Of course, Doctor."

Twilight, unfortunately, was right. No matter how hard the threesome searched they couldn't find anything on the mythical monster, and conditions were getting worse by the day. The physical realm was completely controlled by Discord now. The ground was a pink and purple checkerboard and the sky a swirling cauldron of cotton candy clouds and wind that would sing duets with the birds who had a newly discovered love for opera. The Doctor slammed his book shut and huffed angrily. Twilight and Derpy looked over to see what was wrong.

"That's it! We've been grasping at straws for a week. Or at least what passes as a week in this place. My head hurts from those bloody birds singing and the sun is constantly going up and down. How does that even happen? This stupid planet is still turning at the same rate but the sun and moon are playing peek-a-boo! It isn't possible!"

"This is Discord, Doctor," Derpy told him. "He's a god, and a powerful one. His specialty is the impossible."

"That's another thing. In my experience there's no such thing as a god. Everything that has claimed to be one was lying. There has to be some other explanation!"

"But there isn't," Twilight told the aggravated stallion gently. "Doing all of these insanely powerful spells and not tiring? It just isn't possible if he isn't-"

"A god, I know." The Doctor stood and started pacing.

Derpy flew over to him, narrowly avoiding running into several tables and a bookshelf. "What he is doesn't matter. We know how powerful he is now and we know what can stop him. Why don't you let Twilight and me try and figure out the riddle while you go get some rest? You're looking a little... grey."

"Nonsense." The Doctor yawned. "Time Lords don't need nearly as much sleep as-" he yawned again. "As ponies," he finished.

"Don't argue with me, Doctor. You've been working hard and you haven't fully recovered from your regeneration yet. Go get some sleep and Twilight and I will take it from here, OK?"

Twilight watched with amazement as the hourglass stallion opened his mouth, closed it again, and stomped off, presumably to find a place to take a nap. "Wow Derpy, that was amazing. How did you-?"

"I call it my 'mother voice'. I use it on Dinky all the time. The Doctor has his heart in the right place, but he can act like a foal at times."

Twilight stared at the mare with a new found respect. The pegasus was full of surprises. "I see."

Derpy nodded and let the smile fade from her face. "Twilight, what are we going to do? Every spare moment I'm thinking about that riddle but I haven't made any progress."

"Neither have I," Twilight admitted. "I did find something else though."

"What?" Derpy perked up immediately.

"It's probably nothing."

"At this point every last detail is imperative."

"I know, it's just-" Twilight paused to try to figure out how to put her thoughts to words. "There are little things everywhere, now that I look. Mentions of a mysterious physician and a vanishing blue box."

Derpy nodded absently. "Yes, that would be us. The TARDIS is a time machine after all. I wouldn't worry too much about it if I were you."

"I see." The purple unicorn did her best to swallow her unease but it didn't quite work. She decided not to tell Derpy the other things she had seen in the history books. The bad things. The very bad things. There was no denying that the grey pegasus had seen many things during her adventures with the Doctor. She had most likely seen the rise and fall of civilizations, done her Hearth’s Warming shopping in the next star system, but nothing like this. No, she wouldn't tell the grey pegasus. That gave her a thought. Grey. Suddenly the simple, dull color seemed very, very important.

Author's Note

Chapter Three is done! Finally. This took longer than it should have but hey, it's done now.

Chapter Two

When the Doctor left there was a dumbfounded silence. Spike shrugged it off quickly and set about cleaning up the kitchen but Twilight couldn't just leave the weeping pegasus sobbing her heart out in her kitchen. Unsure of what to do, the unicorn rested her hoof on Derpy's shoulder. "I'm sure he didn't mean it."

"You don't understand." Twilight flinched. Derpy's voice was void of all emotion. Only her tear streaked cheeks showed how much pain she felt inside. "He told me past time that when I next saw him it would be the most important day of his life. He told me to not let him out of my sight because he'd need me. He said he'd need me by his side more than anything else."

"Derpy I-"

The gray pegasus shook her head and stood. "No Twilight. There isn't anything to be done. He didn't know me." Derpy froze. "He didn't know me." Twilight could almost see the gears turning in her head as a smile started to creep up the gray mare's face. "When I met him he knew me. He told me I would need to be strong like he knew what would happen." She turned to Twilight who was thoroughly confused. "This is it! This is where he meets me!"

"Wha-" For the first time in a long time, Twilight felt thoroughly out of her depth. Is this what her friends felt like when she thought out loud? She seriously hoped the princess would write her back soon so she could regain control of the situation.

She didn't have to wait long as a burst of green flame erupted from her assistant, incinerating a waffle and delivering a note that she caught in her magic. "What's it say Twilight?" Spike asked. "Did she say anything about the stallion?"

Twilight's blood ran cold as she read the letter from her beloved teacher and ruler. "Yes. And something else."

"What is it?" Spike and Depry asked in unison.

"I fear that the arrival of this 'hourglass stallion'," she read, "has set in motion events that cannot be stopped. The last time such a thing has happened was over a thousand years ago.

Unfortunately, my fears have already begun to manifest themselves. Discord is free again, and quite possibly even stronger than before. Enclosed are eight tickets for the Friendship Express to Canterlot. Bring the hourglass stallion and his companion. He always has one with him." Twilight looked up at Spike and her guest. "How did she-"

Derpy cut her off with a shout to rival the one that had announced her presence not ten minutes ago. "Doctor! Come quick!"

"What are you-"

"He'll be up in a minute." Sure enough, there was the sound of a door slamming and hoofsteps on the stairs. The Doctor appeared in the stairwell a few moments latter.

"What is it? What's wrong?" He looked so sincere and panicked that Derpy and Twilight couldn't help but burst out laughing. "I- Hey! Stop it! Stop laughing! Not funny." Twilight levitated the letter from the princess over to the Doctor who read it silently, mild annoyance turning to anger.

"No."

Both mares stopped laughing immediately. "What do you mean no?" Twilight asked. "The princess asked you to come. The /princess/. You can't just say no to Celestia!"

"I can and I will. I'm not going to be ordered around by some ruler like a normal person."

"But-"

"Let me handle this," Derpy told Twilight quietly. "So you're not interested in meeting the immortal rules of Equestria who raise the sun and moon every day?"

The Doctor paused. "Did you say immortal?"

Derpy nodded. "Some ponies even say that they're goddesses."

The Doctor thought for a moment. "Fine. But only because I've got nothing better to do while the TARDIS repairs itself."

"Great!" Derpy grabbed two train tickets and handed one to the Doctor. "We'll meet Twilight and her friends at the station. You have your screwdriver?"

The stallion's eyes grew wide and he stared at pile of clothes on the floor. The key to the TARDIS had fallen out of his pocket and been explained away, but his sonic screwdriver hadn't. Twilight and Derpy watched as the Doctor searched the charred garments frantically.

"What are you doing?" Twilight asked.

"My sonic screwdriver. Metal tube with a caged green light at the end. Where is it?!"

"What, this old thing?" The Doctor started as Derpy held out his sonic screwdriver and tossed it to him.

"How did you- never mind. I don't even want to know."

Derpy shrugged. "Whatever you say.

Come on, the Friendship Express waits for no pony."

"The what?"

* * *

At first the rest of the mane six were wary of the hourglass stallion and his companion, but soon their caution gave way to curiosity and they were all getting along just fine. It was grating Twilight's nerves.

"-and it was the bloody queen of England! Everyone was excited, I have to admit I was a bit hyped up too, that is until she saw me."

"Why? What happened?" Rainbow Dash had been on the edge of her seat during the entire story. She hadn't been interested in the story until the Doctor mentioned the witches. The whole story sounded like the plot of one of her Daring Doo novels.

"Well, she-"

"Enough!" Everypony turned to stare at Twilight. She blushed a little at her outburst but continued. "You can't possibly believe him. I mean, curses, time travel, humans right out of Lyra's stories. It's just too fantastic to be true!"

"Oh really?" Attention shifted to Derpy who, up until that point had been quietly enjoying a box of muffins. Nopony knew where she had gotten them, but they also didn't question Derpy about muffins. Now her wings were flared and she was giving her best intimidation state to Twilight. It was strangely effective, even though only one eye was focused on the unicorn at any given moment. "What about all the stuff you've done? Restored a princess to the throne? Turned an ancient god to stone? Saved Equestria from an invasion?"

"Invasion?"

"Doesn't matter. The point is, none of your adventures are any more plausible than his. So next time, think before you get all high and mighty." Derpy turned and stalked back to her seat. Silence reigned for the rest of the journey.

* * *

As awful as Twilight felt for accusing the hourglass stallion of lying, she wished he would shut up. He giggled at unicorn nobles drinking tea, marveled at the architecture of the city, wondered how magic worked, and generally did everything he could to make Twilight want to smack him. He didn't stop talking until Princess Celestia met the group on the steps of the palace. He stopped mid sentence and breathed one word and one word only. "Wow."

Twilight couldn't help but agree. She'd lived most of her life with the sun princess and she still felt awestruck every time she saw her. The alicorn surveyed them all, her gaze passing over each pony in turn. She smiled slightly when she saw Derpy, but stopped when she saw the hourglass stallion. Any semblance of a smile left her and her eyes narrowed. "So I was correct."

"Pardon?" The Doctor wondered if he had or would do anything to anger the godlike creature that stood before him. For a reason he couldn't quite explain, even to himself, the very idea of disappointing her was a thought more terrifying than an army of cybermen.

"The last time I laid eyes on you, you almost destroyed my kingdom. Do not let it happen again." The princess turned and entered the palace. Derpy blushed slightly, but lead the way up the stairs.

The mane six examined their new friends with caution as they trotted along the corridors of the palace. The Doctor was too busy examining the stained glass windows to notice. Derpy just held her head high and carried on. "As I am sure Twilight has told you, Discord has returned for the second time in one year. This worries me."

"Wait a second."

There was a pause. "Yes Doctor?"

"Who's Discord?"

"Really?" Applejack dead panned.

"What? I just got here! Whole new universe to figure out."

"He's the god of chaos," Derpy told him. "He broke free of his stone prison last month and these girls had to defeat him. Now he's on the loose again."

"And the fact that it correlates with your visit is worrying," Celestia told the stallion. By this time they had come to a stop in front of the vault housing the Elements of Harmony. Celestia slid her horn into the slot and the doors slid open to reveal a predictably empty pedestal.

"Why am I not surprised?" the Doctor muttered.

"Discord!" Celestia shouted. "What did you do to the Elements?"

"Oh Celestia," came the echoing voice of the deity. "The Elements are gone. They're safe and sound in a place nopony can reach. I've made sure of that."

"Where did you hide them?"

With a flash of light, Discord appeared in the hallway in front of the princess. "Hide them? Me? Never." His eyes locked onto the Doctor and he smiled slowly. "So you called the Doctor. Feeling ill Celestia?" He circled the Doctor once before bending down to look in him in the eye. "Careful. Sometimes his medicine harms more than it helps." With another flash he teleported to the window depicting his downfall.

"How do you know who I am?"

"Being stone doesn't mean I can't listen. And oh the things I've heard about you! Tell me Doctor, just how many people have died by your hand?"

The Doctor's eyes narrowed and Derpy's wings flared. "And how many by yours?"

"Oh I don't kill," Discord said dismissively. "There are more...entertaining ways to deal with ponies."

"Enough," Celestia cut in. "Where are the elements?"

"Far beyond your reach they lie hidden from the prying eye. maybe a thought, a prayer, a hope can return the things I've broke." With another smile and flash of light Discord was gone, leaving his twisted words to echo throughout the corridor and the ponies to their thoughts.

Author's Note

Finally finished! As an extremely latwe birthday present to an awesome friend, go check out SakaneMiku's deviantART profile. She's an amazing artist.