Chapters "Captain, I have detected something," said a familiar computerized voice.
"Uhg, what is it now Guardian, I'm busy," I responded with some annoyance. I was right in the middle of running some diagnostics on my body, which was currently in suspended animation. (Oh and if you were wondering, my consciousness was wandering through my base's computer systems)
"I just thought you may want to know that six new entities have entered the main chamber," he reported,"and they appear to be of equine descent."
"Whoa whoa whoa, hold up," I said,"equine descent as in horses?"
"Affirmative sir"
"Activate the security feeds, this I got to see," I commanded.
As I linked my consciousness into the security system I could clearly see exactly what Guardian was talking about: on the screen I could see six quadruped creatures that definitly bore a resemblance to horses, more like ponies, but something was very weird.
One was bright orange with a braided blonde main and tail with huge green eyes. It also had three red apples on its hind shoulder and was wearing a wide brimmed hat.
Another, who was not walking but bouncing around like a hyper six-year-old, was almost entirely pink with a mane and tail that looked like they were made of cotton candy with huge blue eyes as well as three baloons in the same place as the first creature's apples.
A third was.. wait, what the?...that one just started flying. It was light blue with a spectrum color mane and tail, dark violet-ish eyes, again, it had a tricolor lightning bolt on its side and freakin' bird wings? What was that called again? Flying horse...flying horse. Oh right its a Pegasus.
The fourth one that I saw was pristine white with a curled, bright purple mane and tail and, again, huge amythest eyes and three gems on its flank. Wait a minute, is that a horn? Wow, a unicorn. That's a new one.
The fifth was another Pegasus but was soft yellow, had a pink mane and tail, had huge blue eyes and three butterflies on its side, as well as a look of absolute terror on its face.
The last one was light purple with a dark purple mane and tail with a hot pink and purple streak, giant purple eyes, and a set of stars on its flank. And what's this? Oh, that one is a unicorn as well.
"Activate audio, they appear to be talking," I ordered Guardian
"Ok, he's not here lets go," whispered the yellow Pegasus, clearly scared to death.
"No Fluttershy, we need to find the warrior, he's the only one who can help us defeat Nightmare Moon," replied the purple unicorn.
"Come on Twilight, we're wasting time here, we can take her on," retorted the blue pegesus while shadow boxing in the air.
"Ah gotta agree with Rainbow Dash here, Twilight, we need ta get a move on if we're gonna get those Elements ah Harmony before Nightmare Moon", said the orange pony in a country accent.
"Look, a button, I bet it opens a door to an amazing party," rattled the pink pony at super speed.
"NO PINKIE! Don't touch anything, we don't know what any of this stuff even is, let alone what it does," commanded the unicorn called Twilight.
"All I know is that it is dreadfully filthy in here and its destroying my mane," huffed the white unicorn.
"EVERYPONY BE QUIET!," yelled Twilight, "look, the book clearly says that the Elements of Harmony are powerful but this warrior will be invaluable in our quest to find them and save Equestria from eternal night."
Where the hell did that book come from? Wait did they say they were looking for a warrior to help on a quest to save a place from evil?
"Guardian, lock down the entrance and activate the revival protocols, this is what I was placed here to do," I ordered
"As you wish, Captain," responded Guardian.
Then I heard the blast door slam closed and Guardian's voice come over the speakers.
"Initiating Project Archangel Revival Procedure"
With that I immediatly returned my conscousness to my body and awaited the awakening of my systems. I could still here the ponies but now they were completely freaked out by the sudden activity and the only sentence I could clearly hear was one of them yelling "PINKIE! WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
"Entering main chamber for system reactivation." With a jolt, my body began to raise through a hole in the floor of the main chamber where it would then undergo the process of disconnecting my systems from the base.
"Archangel System reactivation underway, reinitializing power system." With that, my built-in power cell fired up with a soft hum.
"Activating Life Support Systems, disconnecting external life support." This caused my body to lurch a bit as the large cable that supplied my inactive body with nutrients disconnected and retracted while my internal system took over.
"Reviving Biological components and realigning conscousness with mobile unit." A slight bolt of pain rocketed through me as Guardian broke my body out of its comatose state and bound my mind back to my brain.
"Activating sensor banks." All of a sudden all my senses came back online at once, I could now clearly see the ponies cowering against the door.
"Running diagnostics on cybernetics." A surge of power flowed into my arms and legs jolting the mechanisms to life.
"Finalizing reactivation." This caused the remaining wires and cables to disconnect with pops and snaps, and then to retract into the pair of supporting arms on both sides.
"Removing supporting structure." Then the pair of arms supporting me retracted into the floor leaving me standing in front of the six terrified ponies.
"Revival complete, welcome back Captain Archangel"
Once the initial shock of revival wore off, it immediately hit me that there were six very scared ponies in front of me. I have to be very careful how I handle this. I really don't want to scare them any more than I already had.
"What are you doing here?" I asked in as nonthreatening a tone as I could.
"Can you understand me?" I said in the same tone. I saw the orange one nod yes.
"What are you doing here?" I repeated.
"Look, you don't need to be afraid of me, just tell me what you're doing here, " I said, again, as gently and calmly as I could. At this, the purple unicorn stood up.
"W-w-we were looking for the a-ancient warrior," She stammered out still in fear of me, "We need his help to defeat Nightmare Moon"
"Are you the warrior?" Asked the rainbow maned Pegasus.
"That depends, what is this warrior supposed to do?" I asked.
"Let's see here...," Said the purple unicorn who produced a book from nowhere and levitated it in front of her. This made me recoil in disbelief: how is she doing that?
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"How are you doing that?"
"What?"
"That, with the book," I said while pointing at the book.
"It's just a levitation spell"
"Spell, you mean like magic?" I responded
"Yes, why? Do they not use magic where you're from?" She asked
"No, or at least not that effectively, but, anyway, what were you saying about the warrior?" I said hoping to redirect this back onto the problem.
"Oh, right. The book says that the warrior is necessary to retrieve the 7 elements of harmony: honesty, courage, laughter, loyalty, kindness, generosity, and the unknown seventh element; defeat Nightmare Moon and save Equestria from eternal night" She read off. As I listened to this, I realized that this was why I was here. My mission was to protect this place from an evil that if left alone would cause untold damage. Eternal night sounded like the kind of thing I should help stop.
"Um, excuse me, are you ok?" Asked the unicorn. I had a nasty habit of drifting off into though.
"Huh? Oh, sorry." I said snapping back to reality, "So basically what you're saying is that you need me to accompany the six of you on a dangerous quest to retrieve seven ancient artifacts, one of which we don't even know where it is, and then somehow use them to defeat a creature so powerful, it is capable of plunging this entire world into a state of perpetual night. That about right?"
"Well, when you put it that way, it does seem a little...," The unicorn began nervously.
"That sounds right up my alley," I interrupted, "I'm in"
"Hey, when you've spent as long of a time in a coma as I have, you'll take any excuse to leave," I retorted, "But before we go, I need to get my gear so, if you'll excuse me"
"Guardian, open the armory," I ordered
"Opening"
"Feel free to look around, just ask before you touch anything," I called back, as this could take a few minutes. I then walked to a series of shelves that contained my armor and released the locks that kept them secure. I heard a small sound behind me followed by a faint glow.
"You cannot be serious, Captain." Said the same voice from earlier, "They are horses. Why are you helping them?"
"Ah, so nice of you to join me, G," I replied as I began strapping on my armored boots and greaves, "What can I do for you?"
"It's not like we have anything better to do," I responded while finishing with my leg armor and moving to the arms.
"AHHHHHHH, IT'S A GHOST!" screamed a voice from just outside the armory. I turned immediately to see a pink pony frozen in fear at what i assumed was the holographic image of Guardian.
"No, that's not a ghost." I said as I walked to the pony, "That's Guardian, he's with me. Trust me, he's harmless"
"A-a-a-are y-y-y-you s-s-s-sure?" She stammered out
"Yes," I said as I returned to my armor "G , why don't you introduce yourself while I finish up"
"If you insist," his image turned toward the ponies who had gathered "I am known as Guardian and I am the Captain's personal A.I. assistant"
"See G, that wasn't so bad, was it?" I joked as I was installing one of my shoulder-mounted miniguns, which is quite easy with my mechanical arms, "and besides he is actually not really there. He actually exists in my brain, what you're seeing is just a projection of what he thinks he looks like."Retract I commanded mentally, causing the pair of miniguns to fold down and retract into their places on my back.
"He's a bit antisocial but he means well," I said as Guardian disappeared from view, "anyway I'm ready to go if you are"
"Oh, and by the way," I said as I snapped to attention, " I'm Captain Archangel, Special Operations; Augmented Division. Who are all of you?"
With that, the purple unicorn stepped forward, "I'm Twilight Sparkle, faithful student of Princess Celestia"
"Nice to meet all of... wait, wasn't there another Pegasus earlier?" I asked looking around for the missing pony.
"Oh, you mean Fluttershy, she's right here hidin' from you, I'd guess" answered Applejack as she stepped out of the way
"Its not you I'm s-s-s-scared of, i-i-it's G-G-G-Guardian, h-h-he's scary" she stammered out clearly gripped with fear.
"I am sorry for frightening you Ms. Fluttershy, it was not my intention" said Guardian through my armor's speakers.
"See? He didn't mean it. Come on, let's go get those elements." I said standing back up "Guardian, open the blast door"
"Yes, Captain." then a loud mechanical grinding signaling the door was opening to the outside world and what was sure to be the most interesting adventure in my life.
Author's Note
I am absolute crap at writing for Pinkie Pie.
As I lead the way out of the base, I began to notice just how unaccustomed the ponies were to the level of technology I was familiar with as every automatic door startled them and the lights suprised them when they came on.They should have seen this place when it all worked. I thought, That will totally blow them away
"Hold up a sec," I said as we approached the final door
"Why, what's wrong?" Asked Rainbow Dash somewhat uneasily. These ponies sure are jumpy.
"I booby-trapped this door so no one could escape this place once they entered" I explained, ignoring Pinkie Pie's giggling at the word "booby".
"Then how in the hay're we suppose ta git outta here?" Asked Applejack
"Relax, I got this," I assured them "G, override the door, security code Pyro"
"Door is now open and safe to pass, Captain."
"Thank you."
"Lead on, Ms. Sparkle" I said as we exited the base
"Ok. Follow me, everypo..." She started to say but caught herself before she said 'everypony'
"Don't worry about it" I assured her "Don't change how you talk just because I'm not one of you"
"Ok, if you say so" She replied as she turned and started walking with the rest of us behind her.
"If you have a question, just ask. I really don't mind." I said
"Well, I did have a few questions." Said Twilight, "like first: What are you?"
"What do you mean?" I asked
"No, I mean like...like" She responded, trying to think of a way to explain the seemingly simple question.
"I think what Twilight is trying to say is, for example, I'm a unicorn" Explained Rarity
"Yes, exactly" Confirmed Twilight
"Oh, I get it" I said "I'm a human cyborg"
"A what?" Replied Twilight
"I'm a human that has had some systems and parts replaced or enhanced by machines and technology" I clarified
"What's a human?" Asked Pinkie Pie
"A human is a decendent of primates that is characterized by a large, well-developed brain capable of high level reasoning and problem solving." Guardian explained
"Ok." Twilight replied a little overwhelmed "What did you mean when you said parts of you had been 'replaced'?"
"Take a look." I said as I extended my arms "It means just that. Parts were removed and enhanced ones were installed in there place"
"Wow...that's just...wow" Replied Twilight, clearly blown away by what she just heard. I gathered that this place was centuries behind the technology I had, so trans-humanism, or is it trans-equinism, was still science fiction.
"Ok, my turn." I said changing the subject, "What are those symbols on your sides? Are they like clan marks, or tattoos, or what?"
"You mean these?" She asked while shaking her hind quarters, "They're called Cutie Marks"
"What do they mean exactly?"
"Well, a Cutie Mark is a symbol that represents a special skill or quality that makes a particular pony unique." Twilight explained
"No, mine's actually for my talent with magic." Twilight said
"Got it, so who else has a question?" I ask
"Um, I had a question," Whispered Fluttershy, "Oh, but you don't have to answer it if you don't want to"
"It's alright Fluttershy, I really don't mind," I assured her
"Ok, umm...why does your eye keep doing that," She asked. One of my eye's had been replaced with a
"Doing what?" I said but quickly realizing what she meant, "Oh, you mean changing color?"
"Well, you know how some animals can see different ways?" I began. The shy Pegasus seemed to perk up when I mentioned animals, "Like snakes can see things that are hot, and owls can see at night? Well, my eye can do the same thing, the color represents which kind of vision I am currently using"
"What kind of vision can you have?" interjected Rainbow Dash
"Well I have standard grey where I basically see what you see, there's green night-vision where I can see in the dark, I also have blue X-ray which acts like a hospital X-ray scanner, and I have orange thermal vision which detects heat from diffrent sources and shows me what it looks like."
"Are you, like, a spy or something?" Rainbow asked
"No, I'm not clever or good-looking enough to be a spy." I replied sarcastically. I'd been called a lot of things, but 'spy' was a new one.
"Ah got a question for ya." chimed Applejack, "What were those thing ya put on your back?"
"Oh, those were miniguns." I said, trying to think of how to explain what they are "They spin and fire tiny pieces of metal really fast. Let's just hope I don't have to demonstrate"
"I noticed you wearing clothes unlike anything I've ever seen." said Rarity "I simply must know, what is it made of?"
"It's made of a combination of depleted uranium, titanium alloy and carbon nanotubes all pressed together into a plate that is then placed on top of a layer of ballistic nylon." I answered
"It's made of hard metals and soft fiber that stack together to form layers." I repeated simplifying my answer
"Oh, ok." she said still not really fully understanding.
"I'm just curious, where exactly are we going?" I asked Twilight
"Well, according to the book, the Elements of Harmony were last seen in the Palace of the Royal Pony Sisters which is located in there" She points to the wooded area I hadn't even noticed in front of us, "the Everfree Forest" she recites
"THE EVERFREE FOREST!" exclaimes the other five ponies
"Alright, I'll bite. What is so dangerous about the Everfree Forest?"
"The Everfree Forest just ain't natural" said Applejack
"Animals care for themselves" added Fluttershy
"And the clouds move on their own" said Rainbow Dash
Ok, now I'm confused. What the hell do they mean 'not natural'? Everything they just said IS natural in a forest. Well, I guess I should just play along and ask later.
"We have an important job to do here," I began, "and honestly, how bad could it be when the Ancient Warrior is on your side? Come on, lets show this 'Nightmare Moon' who's boss!"
"YEAH!" the ponies cheered in unison
"But...," whispered a soft voice, "it's really dark in there"
"Not to worry Fluttershy, I got it covered." I assured her as I reached to my right sholder. I pressed a small switch on the side of my head causing an LED flashlight to flip out and bath the area in white light. Switching to night-vision, I followed Twilight into the forest with the rest of the ponies close behind.
"Guardian, download into mobile platform." I commanded while throwing the cylinder into the air. In a second, the cylinder produced a pair of tandem rotor blades that spun with a hum, suspending it in mid air.
"Guardian, get me a good view of the terrain."
"Yes Captain." he responded. I hit a few buttons on my right arm and a holographic computer display materialized. I synced up with the drone and I could see everything he could, which amounted to no more than trees and a river.
"Can I help you, Ms. Dash?" I asked of the pegesus hovering just over my shoulder
"What is that thing?" she asked as she pointed a hoof at the green display.
"Its a hologram, like the one Guardian used back where you found me. Its linked to Guardian's platform up there," I answered pointing to the drone, "so I can see what's around here, but it looks like its just trees"
"Uh, did anyone else feel that?" I asked
"Feel what?" Asked Applejack
"The ground just shook a little"
"Nah, Ah didn't feel a thing"
Then the cliff face gave way. The four flightless ponies and myself began hurtling toward the edge. Thinking quickly, I stretched my right arm toward the mountain and launched my grappling spike. The spike drove itself firmly into the rock face and extended a series of serrated teeth that held it in place. I would be fine, but I still had to stop the two closest ponies from hurtling over the edge.
"I will catch the pink one, Captain." reported Guardian as he dove to snare Pinky Pie with his own grapple cables.
"I Gotcha!" I exclaimed as we ground to a halt inches from the edge. I let go of Rarity's tail and stood up, now it was just Applejack, Rarity and I on the cliff.
"Well now that that's over, could I offer you two a lift to the bottom?" I offered trying to sound relaxed
"Hmpf, well since it is the only way down" huffed the angry unicorn. Yep, I pissed her off
"Well , if it wouldn't be too much trouble" replied the orange pony
"Ok then, one of you climb on my back and hold on tight. I'll carry the other with my free hand" I said. Applejack quickly jumped up and locked her hooves around my waist, ensuring a tight hold, while I picked up Rarity and held her under my arm. Walking to the edge, I retracted the grapple from it's previous place and fired it again, this time near the edge of the cliff, I inched myself off until just my boots were above it.
"Uh, Captain," said Applejack nervously "Have ya ever done this before?"
"Calm down AJ, usually when I'm doing this I'm getting shot at. We'll be fine." I assured her and pushed off, repelling down the rock face. As soon as I pushed off, both ponies tensed up in fear, which I guess makes sense considering they probably never have been rock climbing. Two minutes later, we touched down and the both of them jumped to the safety of solid ground. I retracted the grapple spike and turned around to see a very pissed off cobalt-eyed unicorn staring at me.
"Hey, I'm sorry I grabbed your tail like that Rarity." I apologized. She stood up on her back legs and reared back her left hoof. I was too distracted by the fact that these ponies could apparently balance on there back legs, that I only just barely managed to back up and avoid Rarity's smack.
"Rarity, I'm use to dodging swords and bullets." I said as she fell onto her front two legs "You, I could dodge in my sleep"
"Uh, are you Ok Captain?" Asked Rainbow
"Yeah, I'm fine," I said "Just thought I saw something. Why don't we get outta here before more stuff starts falling."
Author's Note
Longest one yet, Hooray. 10 points to whoever can guess what Captain Archangel thought he saw.
Manticores and Musical Numbers
After making sure everyone was alright and prying Guardian's drone away from a very thankful Pinky Pie, we continued on the path to the castle. I didn't talk much, as I was thinking about what I thought I saw and talking it over with Guardian.
"Hey G, did you see that thing from before?" I mentally said to Guardian
"Affirmative." he answered, "I did indeed detect an anomalous energy signature in the area you specified"
"Any idea what it was?" I asked
"Negative, the signature was only recorded for approximately .08 seconds before disappearing but its shape suggests that it may have mearly been interference as this area, as Ms. Jack so eloquently described, ain't natural."
"Well, keep scanning for it." I ordered, "If it appears again let me know"
"Of course, Sir."
"Hey Rainbow" I said "what did you mean when you said the clouds here move on their own?"
"I mean the weather is out of control, no pegesus can keep it in check" she explained
"Wait, you mean pegesi like you and Fluttershy make weather happen and not air currents?" I responded in amazement
"Well, Fluttershy doesn't really handle weather jobs, but yeah; me and a team of weather ponies take care of the weather in Ponyville: making it rain, clearing clouds that sort of thing" she continued
"Pegesus ponies are uniquly gifted with the ability to walk on and manipulate clouds." explaned Twilight "it's like a kind of passive magic they possess"
"Ok, so if Pegasi have weather magic and unicorns have...active magic I guess, then do regular ponies also have magic?" I asked.
"First of all, the proper term is 'Earth pony'." corrected Twilight "Second, yes they do, but it is even more subtle than the pegesus magic."
"How so?"
"Well, it is a kind of natural magic that has developed due to their close relationship with the earth and nature."
"Oh, ok, so Applejack and Pinkie Pie are capable of manipulating nature."
"Not exactly, it's more like they work with nature and help it do what it wants instead of forcing it to do what they want"
"Oh, I get it now" I say, not really understanding.
"Mr. Archangel, could I ask you a question?" Inquired Rarity
"Go for it."
"I noticed that there is a gem in the middle of your chest," She said "And it is unlike anything I have ever seen. I simply must know what it is"
"Oh this" I said gesturing to the glowing circle in the center of my chest "it's a Lapotron Emerald. I use it as my power cell."
"I've never even heard of such a gem."
"Well, technically its a composite of emerald and lapis lazuli, with some electronics to help monitor its energy."
"Oh you simply must let me take a look at it, it would go perfectly on the new dress design I have."
"NO" I blurted out accidentally startling Rarity "I mean, no, I can't let you see it. Once charged, a Lapotron Emerald has to remain in a special purpose containment unit. Removing a charged crystal causes it to destabilize and explode"
"Oh, I am sorry Mr. Archangel" she apologized, why I don't know "I had no idea"
"Not to worry, how could you have known" I assured her "actually, now that I think about it, I think I may have an uncharged spare cell back at my base that I could give you"
"REALLY!?" she exclaimed "that would be absolutely perfect"
"Sure, once this is over we can...wait, what was that?" I said
"Ah don't know, but it sure don't sound friendly" confirmed Applejack
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?" I exclaim in confusion
"It's a Mantacore" explained a terrified Twilight
"Mantacore are creatures that combine a lion's body, draconic wings, shark teeth and a scorpion's tail" recited Guardian
"Take that, you ruffian!" she said triumphantly. But her victory was short-lived as the Mantacore recovered and gave a mighty roar, which was apparently enough to send Rarities mane into complete disarray, making her run for cover.
"My turn" I declared "G, boost power to strength"
"Sorry 'bout that" apologized Applejack as she hopped off of me "thanks for catchin' me though"
"Ugh, no problem" I said dazed as I stood up a little shaky "this thing is going to get it now"
"OH COME ON!" I exclaimed as I was hit by Rainbow Dash which flung us both back into my favorite tree again. Landing in the imprint I had been working on and slumped back down onto the ground dazed.
"Captain" said Rainbow concerned "are you ok?"
"I'll be fine" I said "just give me a minute"
While Fluttershy had the manticore's attention, the rest of us picked our lower jaws off the ground and snuck around the creature. Once on the other side, Twilight and I waited eagerly for Fluttershy to follow us so we could ask her how she knew what to do.
"Fluttershy, that was amazing" said Twilight "how did you know ?"
"Oh, I didn't" she confessed "sometimes we all just need to be shown a little kindness"
"Captain, the energy signature has just appeared" reported Guardian
"Where?"
"Signal lost" said Guardian "I am sorry, Captain. It did; however, appear to be moving in the same direction as we are"
"Captain, is something wrong?" inquired Twilight
"Huh, oh, no, I'm fine. Lets move on"
"Hey, Fluttershy" I said trying not to startle her "you really like animals, huh?"
"Oh yes, I love all my little critter friends" she replied with a renewed energy "they are just like us, they like when you're kind to them"
"Well, you seem to have quite a bit of experience with animals" I said "is that what you do instead of weather jobs like Rainbow?"
"Yes. I take care of all the little animals" she said "I give them food, shelter, and medical help if they need it. Actually, that's how I met some of my little friends like Hummingway the hummingbird"
"Wow, you really are an animal lover" I said
"You have no idea" interjected Rainbow Dash "she's the only pony I've ever seen have a tea party with a bear, an alligator, and a snake"
"I'll take your word for it" I said with a laugh
"What? What's wrong?" I said as I drew out my tomahawk, ready to do battle with whatever came up
"Really? That's it?" I said "You do realize that it's just a tree, right?"
"Y-y-yeah, but the f-f-faces are s-s-scary" stuttered Twilight. I turned to face the tree
"Maybe so, but it's a tree" I repeated. Then in one swift motion, I raised my axe and sent it flying toward the tree, hitting it dead center with a satisfying THUNK .
"See? It's not going to hurt you"
"Pinkie, why aren't you scared?" asked Fluttershy
Because it's a tree I thought as I retreaved my tomahawk.
"Oh girls, don't you see?" she replied. And that's when she started singing.
"When I was a little filly and the sun was going down..." she began
"Tell me she's not..." groaned Twilight
"The darkness and the shadows, they would always make me frown..." Pinkie continued, hopping around happily
"She is" confirmed Rarity
"Oh, you have GOT to be kidding" I complained punctuated with a facepalm
"You saw that, right G?" I asked mentally
"Affirmative" he responded "I confirm that that anomaly is indeed the signal that we detected at the cliff, as well as near the manticore. I also suspect that that entity is responsible for and will continue to be responsible for the troubles we face on this mission"
"I fully agree, let's not keep it waiting"
As the ponies and myself soldiered on, I began to think about my part in all of this: I was suppose to be an ancient warrior, a being of such power that, apparently, the ponies buried me in a state of suspended animation for a time when my skills were again needed. But I wasn't so sure. To these ponies, I may be a juggernaut but I'm still human.
"Partially human" Guardian corrected. I hate that he can read my thoughts sometimes.
"Can you hear that?" I asked the group
"Hear what?"
"Come on y'all, lets go check it out" suggested Applejack
"WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE SUCH TORMENT?!" howled the creature in a slightly effeminate voice
"Excuse me sir, why are you crying" inquired Twilight
"Well, I don't know" the serpent began "I was just sitting here, minding my own business, when this tacky little cloud of purple smoke just whisked past me and tore half of my beloved mustache clean off, and now I look simply horrid"
"Are you serious?" groaned Rainbow Dash
"That's what this is all about?" said Applejack
"Hey, we could always just even it out by cutting off the other half" I offered as I brandished my axe. I quickly rolled out of the way as a large, scaly fist slammed the ground where I had been.
"DUDE, I WAS JOKING!" I yelled at the sea snake, then Rarity chimed in.
"Captain, maybe you should let me handle this"
"Good plan, I'll be over there" I agreed as I walked toward a tree and sat down.
"What are you doing, Captain?" she asked
"Huh?" I said as I was jolted from my trance "Oh, nothing much, just sharpening my axe"
"Hey Captain, What does that mean?" she asked pointing at the inscription on my axe's blade.
"It says 'Don't Back Down'. It's part of the montra my partner and I followed in the Special Forces"
"You had a partner?" she asked intently
"Yeah, Codename 'Sword Dancer'. She was my closest friend" I said putting the axe and plate down "this axe was actually a gift from her"
"That's nice of her, I think" she replied "So that is a really special possession of yours, isn't it?"
"Yeah" I sighed "It's the only thing I have to remind me of her. That inscription was her part of the montra" I paused, the memories of Sword Dancer coming back.
"Whenever we were in a bind, I would look to her and say 'Don't Back Up' to which she would reply 'Dont Back Down'. It was like a rallying cry. When she gave me that axe, I gave her the custom sword I had made for her with the inscription 'Don't Back Up' on its blade. That was so we would always have each other even when we were apart"
"Wow Captain, I never pegged you for the sentimental type" Twilight said
"Hey, she was my closest and best friend" I said defensively "she always had my back, and she was amazing in every way: smart, strong, beautiful, funny... the list goes on"
"Ok, ok calm down" said Twilight "I was only joking. But still, she sounds like an amazing friend"
"What happened to her?" she asked innocently. My heart sank and my reminicent smile faded which Twilight noticed
"I don't know" I said somberly "the last time I remember being with her was when we exchanged those weapons. I haven't seen or heard from her since"
"I'm so sorry, Captain" she responded with genuine concern
"Hey, don't worry about it" I said pulling myself together "she's tough, she can handle whatever gets thrown at her"
"Looks like Rarity and the serpent are finishing up" I redirected "let's go see what's up"
"Well, I simply cannot let such a crime against fabulosity go uncorrected" the unicorn declaired
"Rarity, what are you..." began Twilight, but she was stopped by Rarity's actions.
"Well, it's not as beautiful as it usually is" Rarity said while glaring at me
"Oh, let it go Rarity" I said as the other ponies began chuckling to themselves
"OH...MY...GOSH" eclaimed the serpent "My mustache...it's beautiful"
"You look positively stunning" said Rarity
"But Rarity" said Twilight "your beautiful tail"
"Oh, it's fine, my dear" she said "short tails are in this season. And besides, it'll grow back"
"So would his mustache" whispered Rainbow to Applejack
"Hey" said Twilight as she jumped into the water "It looks like we can cross now..WOAH"
"Allow me" he said
"Hey Rarity" I said with a little smirk "Why did I get smacked for grabbing your tail to save you, but you just let that serpent have your tail?"
"Because, darling" she answered "You never touch a mare's tail without permission"
"Touché" I said defeated
"All right, all right, I get it" I said "Just don't fall off any cliffs because now there's nothing for me to hold on with"
During the hike, a very thick fog decended on us.
"Ok, everybod...I mean everypony" I addressed them "try to stay with me. I can use my systems to see through the fog"
"Hey, where'd the Captain git to?" asked Applejack
"That's not funny" she said Angerly
"Hey, don't dish what you can't take" I replied still chuckling to myself "maybe now you'll stop scaring everyone"
"Twilight, don't move" I ordered "there's a cliff there"
"So, how do we get over there?" asked Twilight
"Twilight?" answered Rainbow Dash as she unfurled her wings
"Oh" she said realizing here mistake "right"
"Captain, I have detected that signature again" reported Guardian
"Location?"
"Across the ravine interacting with Ms. Dash" he answered
"Hey, Rainbow" I called out "You alright over there?"
"Hey, what's going on?" I said out loud while frantically cycling through my visions
"Something is causing enough electromagnetic interfearence to create a barrier that your vision is unable to penetrate"
"Is something wrong Captain?" asked Fluttershy
"Something is keeping me from seeing Rainbow Dash and the other three ponies over there" I explained "I don't like this"
"Other ponies?" asked Applejack
"I think so but now I can't see anything"
"Can't you just send your little assisstant?" suggested Pinkie.
"Negative Ms. Pie, the problem is not that something is in the way, but that something is rendering the Captain's equipment ineffective" explained Guardian. All five ponies immediatly looked at me for a translation.
"He said that something is making my electronics not work, so G can't use his drone to investigate because it would break" I said causing a chorus of oh's.
"Maybe she can still hear us" suggested Twilight
"Good idea" I agreed as I turned back toward where Rainbow was "Hey Rainbow, don't leave us hangin'"
"Wait, I can hear them" I said as I channeled the voices through my armor's speakers.
"Absolutely, I would love to join" Rainbow squeeled in joy "just let me tie this bridge back up and..."
"NO! It's them or us!" interrupted an unknown voice
"Who was that?" asked Pinkie
"Shh, their still talking" I said
"You...Thank you for the offer" said Rainbow "really, it means alot, but I have to say no"
"Alright Rainbow" we all cheered
"What can I say" Rainbow shrugged "I could never leave my friends hangin'"
"You guys go first" I said to the ponies "I don't know how well this bridge will react to six ponies and a 500-lb. super-soldier at the same time"
"Good point, Captain" agreed Twilight. And with that the six mares crossed the bridge with little more than a few creaking boards.
"Alright Captain, your turn" Pinkie Pie called back happilyWell, here goes nothing This bridge is way stronger than I thought
"CAPTAIN!" screamed the ponies as I fell. Thinking quickly, I armed my grappling spike again and fired it into the far side of the canyon where it embeded itself deep in the rock. With a snap of the cable as it tensed under my weight, I hung from the wire for a few seconds until I regained my composure.
"Captain, are you ok?" asked Rainbow Dash
"Oh my gosh, Mr. Archangel are you hurt?" asked a concerned Fluttershy who were both hovering in front of me.
"Yeah, I'll be fine" I assured them "but there is no way in hell I'm going across that bridge again"
"What is it with us and fallin' off of crap?" I asked jokingly to the ponies around me "How much further is it to the castle?"
"It should be right through this last bit of woods" answered Twilight
"Good, because I am getting tired of this place"
After the harrowing experience at the bridge, I was ready to find those elements and finish off Nightmare Moon, who I'm sure either is in control of or actually is the mysterious mist that's been ghosting us this whole time. I swear, when I find Nightmare I'm gonna fill her full of holes for what she's done to my friends. Wait, did I just call these ponies my friends? I can't believe it...I...I made friends. All the more reason to keep up the pressure and and keep them safe.
"Captain, BEHIND YOU!" shouted Twilight. I spun around grabbing my axe when I saw a large dog lunging at me. The force of the attack knocked my tomahawk out of my hand as the wolf pinned me to the ground. Oh god, that smells bad. Before any of the ponies could even react, I had already begun my counter-attack with a bone-shattering punch to the wolf's leg creating a spray of...splinters? while the wolf was stunned, I rolled it off of me and jumped back to my feet, ready to finish it off. In one motion, I ran to the wolfs side and stomped my armored boot through its chest, killing it and causing it to fall apart like a house of cards. After making sure it was dead, I turned to Fluttershy.
"What was that thing!?" I asked panicked
"T-t-that's a timberwolf" she answered
"Wolf? you mean like a pack animal?" I asked
"Affirmative Captain, I detect a large number of creatures in the immediate area and closing fast" said Guardian over my speakers
"G, pull up the rear and make sure none of those things get to us"
"Understood"
"Let's move" I ordered and began running down the path. Using my shield to bash any timberwolves out of the way and break through the lines they were creating, occationally switching my vision to Guardian's camera to check on the group.
"When I say so, run to the castle" I ordered "I'll hold them off"
"Captain..." Twilight began to argue
"Twilight, this is what I do, remember?" I said "now get ready"
Activating OTS Weapon system
Voice key required
"May God have mercy upon my enemies, because I won't" I recited
Voice key accepted
"Fluttershy, these things are made of wood, right?" I asked
"Yes" she confirmed
"Perfect" I switched the mass fabricator on
"Fabricate tracer ammunition " I commanded
Fabricating 5.56 X 45 mm XM780 tracer ammunition
Updating HUD
"Affirmative"
Fire control system online
Targeting systems online
Slaving armaments to helmet
All combat systems activated and ready
"Get ready" I said my voice now more like Guardians due to the helmet's voice modulator
"NOW!" I shouted "Get to the Castle"
"Maximum fire rate" I commanded
"OH COME ON! What is this Voltron crap" I exclaimed in disbelief
"Great, now it's too thick for the tracers to work" I observed "new plan"
"Bad dog" I said calmly as the timer expired
"G, do you read me"
"Affirmative, Captain"
"Give me a sit-rep"
"The elements are gone" he said "as is Ms. Sparkle"
"Where are they?"
"Transmitting location now. Be careful Captain, that signal is with her"
"C'mon G, aren't I always?" I said sarcastically
"No" Guardian replied
"Hold position until I say otherwise, keep those ponies safe"
"Affirmative"
I was in a dead run toward the waypoint provided by my assistant. I knew that Twilight was in trouble and I was determined to keep her safe. As I made my way, I analyzed the data and determined the exact position Twilight was in: she was inside one of the outer towers on the top level.
"Why can't they ever be on the bottom floor?" I complained sarcastically
"Guardian, patch me through your speakers." I radioed Guardian
"Done."
"Girls, it's me, Archangel. I found Twilight and the elements, but Nightmare Moon is here to" I told them "Follow Guardian and get here as soon as you can."
"We are inbound, Captain."
"Good, see you here"
"Pick on someone your own size, Jackass!" I shouted as I clanked the bottom of my shield on the floor.
"C-Captain?!" said Twilight in amazement, "How did you...?"
"It's what I do, remember?" I replied, "Are you ok?"
"Yes, I'm fine," Twilight replied recovering her composure
"Good. Do you think you can make the Elements work?"
"I don't know," Twilight admitted, "But I have an idea"
"Do whatever you need to do," I said drawing my axe "I'll hold Nightmare off"
"How DARE you attack me!" she thundered "You will pay for that"
"And you will pay for attacking my friends," I shot back, "or did you forget about the cliff, the Mantacore, and the Timberwolves?"
"Who are you?" She asked
"I am Captain Archangel," I proclaimed, "And I'm here to put an end to this"
"You can't be serious, warrior," she said unimpressed, "I am one of the most powerful magical beings known to pony kind, and you are just one...whatever you are"
"What is so funny"
"You obviously have no idea who you are dealing with" I said, making sure I was clear "You don't scare me. Your magic doesn't scare me, and I highly doubt the two together will scare me either."
"Fabricate ammunition: FMJ" I commandedFabricating 5.56X45 mm full metal jacket ammunition
"Impressed?" I asked
"Your abilities are impressive but now it's my turn." she declared charging her horn. She reared her head back and then snapped it forward, sending a bolt of light at me. I threw up my shield which blocked the energy: Titanium, gotta love it.
"What's the matter Nightmare?" I taunted looking around for the villain, "You scared?" I heard a noise behind me. I turned to see a pile of glass and brass casings rising into the air enveloped in a dark blue aura. I was confused why they were floating, until they snapped into pointing at Twilight.
"Oh no you don't!" I exclaimed as I jumped between the unicorn and the projectiles, deflecting the shards with my armor and shield. Then, I felt a burst of energy as Nightmare fired a bolt severing my gun from its mount, landing with a crash on the hard stone floor.
"GAHH, What the..." I exclaimed in shock, falling to one knee
"Captain!" Twilight panicked as she ran to my side, "Are you ok?"
"Yeah" I confirmed as I stood back up "Keep working with the Elements. Don't worry about me"
"Your CQC isn't bad, but this has gone on long enough." I declared, "Time to end this"
Charging Lapotron Cannon
"They're up here"
"Giddy-up everypony"
"Reinforcements have arrived"
"You lose, Nightmare" I said as my friends arrived through the entrance.
"No...NO, I will not be defeated!" then Nightmare transformed into mist and entered my power cell chamber causing my power levels to fluctuate wildly. I could hear the energy arcing over my armor and metal parts, my body flailing in response to the sudden spikes and dips in power. I fell to my knees. I could see the ponies all looking on in shock as I was torn apart from the inside by Nightmare.
Power systems unstable, activating safeguards
"Twilight, MOVE!" was the last thing I remember saying before I lost consciousness.
"Cap.... .. you ..ed me?"
"Captain ..n .ou he.r me?"
"Guardian?" I asked "That you?"
"Affirmative" he replied "I have stablized your systems, but the power fluctuation damaged your power cell. It will no longer recharge and is currently stablized at 37% capacity"
"Perfect" I said with equal parts relief and dread. I could hear Nightmare Moon threatening my friends behind me.
"You ponies have been a thorn in my side for far too long" she stated "and now it's time to fix that"
"I don't think so" I declared
"Captain! Y-you're ok!" exclaimed Twilight
"Hey, don't back up..." I began
"Don't back down" Twilight finished creating a warm feeling in me
"But..but that's not possible" stammered Nightmare in disbelief "you should be dead"
"While my friends are in danger, I will never be stopped." I proclaimed proudly. Nightmare shook her head and regained her composure.
"That is irrelevent. The Elements of Harmony are no more" she said gesturing with her hoof to the gravel on the floor.
"I don't care" I said "I will never let you hurt my friends" which I punctuated by stomping my armored boot on the ground.
"You just don't get it, warrior" she said triumphantly, rage building in me like a tightening spring "you have lost"
"No, Nightmare" she challenged "It's YOU who doesn't understand. You think the Elements of Harmony can be destroyed just like that?" punctuated, stamping her hoof on the stone floor
"Well you're wrong" She continued "Because the Elements of Harmony are right here"
"What?" both Nightmare Moon and I asked. Twilight turned to Applejack
"Applejack, who reassured me when I was in doubt, represents the Spirit of Honesty."
"The spirits of these ponies and this soldier got us through every challenge you threw at us"
"You still don't have the seventh element" she pointed out "the spark didn't work"I hate when the enemy has a point
"But it did! A different kind of spark" she began as she turned toward us "I felt it the very moment I realized how happy I was to hear you, to see you, how much I cared about you, and when I realized just how far you were willing to go for me. The spark ignited inside me when I realized that you all are...my friends! You see, Nightmare Moon, when those Elements are ignited by the spark that resides in the heart of us all, it creates the seventh element: the element of magic!"
At that point, the shards began glowing and spinning faster and the seven of us began to levitate off of the ground. A sphere of energy appeared above us and in a blinding flash, the shards converged on each of us. I could feel a power run through every vein and circuit in my body, then another blinding flash of light.
"Ow" I said as I stood up
"Oh, my head" said Rainbow holding a hoof to her temple.
"Everypony okay?" asked Applejack
"Oh Rarity" said Fluttershy "It's beautiful"
"I know" Rarity said admiring her tail which had magically reappeared "I will never part with it again"
"No" Fluttershy corrected "Your necklace. It looks just like your Cutie Mark"
"Aw yeah" said Rainbow holding her ruby lightning bolt
"Look at mine, look at mine" Said Pinkie happily bouncing around with her new blue opal balloon
"Wow, you guys look awesome" I said. All the ponies began staring at me
"What?" I asked
"Captain, look at your armor" pointed out Rarity
"Wow." I said in disbelief "This is amazing"
"Gee, Twilight! I thought you were just spoutin' a lot of hooey, but I reckon we really do represent the elements of friendship" said Applejack
"Indeed you do." said a new voice
"Show yourself!" I called out. Then through a window I hadn't busted through, a tall pegesus unicorn with a pure white coat, a perpetually flowing mane and tail of four pastel colors, and wearing golden...uh...I guess shoes is the best way to describe them, a golden necklace and a crown.
"Identify yourself!" I ordered
"Captain!" hissed Twilight from behind me "What are you doing!? That's Princess Celestia!"
"At ease, Captain" she said in a soft, soothing voice "I mean you and your friends no harm" I panicked a little at the mistake I had just made.
"Y-your majesty" I stuttered as I backed away and snapped to attention "I meant no disrespect, I..."
"It's fine, Captain," she said calming me a bit "I understand your concern"
"Twilight Sparkle, my faithful student" she said "I knew you could do it"
"Wait, you said it was just an old pony tale" I heard Twilight say but I was too busy to hear the rest. I heard a sound from behind us and fearing Nightmare Moon may still be a threat I moved to investigate. Sure enough, I saw a Nightmare Moon, but something was different. She was half her normal size and lacked the armor she had been wearing. Regardless, she was still a threat so I drew my axe and reported my findings to the Princess.
"Uh, Your Highness" I said "You may want to see this"
"Princess Luna" she began as she addressed the small unicorn pegesus "It has been a thousand years since I have seen you like this. Time to put our differences behind us. We were meant to rule together, little sister"
"Sister?" we all said in shock
"Will you accept my friendship?" asked Celestia
"I'm so sorry! I missed you so much, big sister" answered Luna as she hugged her sister
"I've missed you, too"
"Hey you know what this calls for?"
"How do we get back?" I asked "'cause there is no way I'm crossing that bridge again"
"Simple Captain" answered Celetia "with the help of my sister, I can teleport all of us back to Ponyville"
"Wait, teleport?" I asked slightly worried "That sounds like it could end badly"
"C'mon Captain" Twilight interjected "this is Princess Celestia. I think she knows what she's doing"
"Ok, but if I come out of this messed up, I am going to be furious" I warned
"It's settled then" declared Celestia "gather around everypo..." she hesitated
"It's fine" I assured her "I really don't mind"
Then Celestia's horn began glowing a pale cobalt, while Luna's glowed a deep blue, surrounding all of us with a bubble of magical energy. I was trully freaking out as I had never teleported before, but I had heard that teleportation has usually ended badly. In a bright flash of light, I realized that we were all now standing in front of a large tree that had a door and windows in it.
So this is where the Keebler company headquarters is I thought to myself as I looked at the tree.
"Wait here everypony" said Pinkie Pie as she disappeared into the tree. I tried to follow her but I was stopped by the sound of power saws, pnematic wrenches, a blow-torch, and an elephant. Fifteen seconds later, the door opened and Pinkie ushered us all in.
"How...but...what the. huh?" I stuttered in amazement as I walked in. The building, which appeared to be a library of some sort, had been decorated with streamers, balloons, confetti, and had snacks, games,and other pony party-goers.
"Captain" said Applejack "there's one thing ya need ta know 'bout Ponyville: If Pinkie Pie was involved, don't question it."
"Got it" I answered with a smile.
"C'mon everypony" squeaked Pinkie "IT'S PARTY TIME"
"Captain" it said "need I remind you that your power cell is currently at 10% power capacity and falling. I recommend replacing it now"
"Good idea G" I answered "do me a favor and head back to base and grab one for me, would you?"
"As you command" he replied obediently as he flew out the door. Where would I be without you, Guardian
"Woah" I paniced as I sliced at the cup with my axe "Oh, hi Twilight"
"Hi Captain" she said as she walked more cautiously
"Heh, sorry about that" I apologized nervously sheathing my axe "still not used to magic yet"
"Don't worry about it" she assured me "I'm still getting used to what you do to"
"What are you doing out here" she asked "the party is inside"
"I know" I responded "I'm just not much of a party guy. Don't tell Pinkie"
"Don't worry, I won't" she replied with a giggle "So, what are you doing out here?"
"Just thinking" I answered
"Thinking about your partner?"
"Yeah" I said realizing something "Sorry, I don't know why I'm always thinking about her"
"Hey, it's no problem" she said placing a hoof on my shoulder "the way you described her, she's worth remembering"
"I guess" I said as Twilight removed her hoof "I just hope this party doesn't end like the ones Sword and I use to go to"
"Why's that?"
"Well usually" I began "Sword and I would go to some little bar or club, just to hang out, have a few drinks, talk, that sort of thing. After a while, some drunk guy would stagger up to the two of us trying to put the moves on Sword. She'd reject him, but he would persist. I would intervene and be insulted for my augmentations, and then Sword would defend me. Then, he'd try to force himself on Sword, which is inveritably when I would punch them across the room."
"Yeah" I said shaking my head and smiling "I got us kicked out of alot of places like that"
"So you protected her"
"And she protected me"
"Hey Twilight" I said
"Yeah?"
"I was just thinking, if the Elements of Harmony all took the form of the cutie marks of the six of you" I gestured to the gear in my chest "Do you think that this would be my cutie mark if I was a pony?"
"It is quite possible, although you ARE the first human to ever have an Element"
"Don't look now Twilight, but everyone else is watching us" I whispered
"Really?" she responded "I wonder why that is?"
"They all think we are in a relationship of some kind, since we get along so well"
She giggled again "Oh really? How can you tell?"
"Computer Assisted Social Interaction Enhancer or C.A.S.I.E. for short" I explained "basically it enhances my ability to read social situations. An after-market upgrade allows my computers to even interpret brainwave patterns"
"Wow" Twilight said genuinly impressed "How many different gadgets do you have?"
"Enough" I said vaguely "Watch this"
"Hey Rarity, you can come out now" I said "I actually have something for you"
"I have no idea what you mean, Captain" she said trying to save her dignity
"Sure. Anyway, I almost forgot that I said I had a spare Lapotron Emerald for you"
"C-captain!" she stuttered "What are you doing!? I thought you said that removing that from its container would cause it to explode"
"Normally, you'd be correct" I began "these crystals are special because they draw in and store energy from numerous sources. The only problem is that, when they are left alone, they will keep absorbing power until they can't hold any more and vent themselves by expolding. That is why the electronics are in place: to regulate its charge pattern. But when Nightmare Moon entered my systems, she caused a huge surge of energy to bombard the crystal, which burn it out so it wouldn't recharge"
"Long story short" I clarified "This crystal will not explode. Also, there is a little energy left in it, so it will glow on its own"
"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you" she cheered "This will be PERFECT for my new design" And she ran off.
"Well, that was not what I expected" I said a little shell-shocked
"But Captain" asked Twilight "don't you need that to keep you alive?"
"I already sent Guardian to pick up a new one from my base" I assured her "and besides all of the critical systems in my body have a back-up system that lasts for a few hours"
"Did someone say my name?" asked Guardian as he hovered onto the balcony, crystal in his grapple cables.
"Well" I said as I turned "speak of the devil"
"You may want to take a step back" I warned Twilight, who complied
"Here goes"
"Power cell activation successful" reported Guardian
"Back in business" I said triumphantly
"Ms. Sparkle" Said a gruff voice from the door "The Princess has requested your presence as well as the Captain's"
"On our way, Sarge" I said
"How did you know he was a sergeant?" asked Twilight as we walked to into the library
"Lucky guess" I replied with a shrug
"Captain Archangel of the Augmented Division of Special Operations" She began "I would like to extend an offer to you"How did SHE know that
"As you wish your majesty"
"I offer you the position of leader of a new breed of defender. Your mission will be to stand ready to fight any evil that threatens Equestria or its inhabitants"
"I accept your offer Princess" I answered gesturing toward the ponies "But on one condition: that I remain in Ponyville with my friends"
"And I would also like to remain in Ponyville, Princess" added Twilight
Celestia chuckled softly, then answered "Permission granted, both of you"
"Well, in that case" I said as I snapped to attention and saluted my new commander "Captain Archangel, Royal Equestrian Special Operations, reporting for duty ma'am"
This was going to be the best deployment ever.