Chapter 1View OnlineFreakChapter 1Scootaloo looked at her surroundings, she was in a comfortable field with cattails brushing against her legs as she wandered through the open space. She knew she was dreaming, she had become lucid almost immediately. A strangely common incident since Princess Luna came to visit her to help with her plague of nightmares. But now she had a new problem, something terrible. She conjured up the image of a colt in her class, Rumble. He was a good colt, polite, well spoken, handsome by anyponies standards. She stepped towards him, his eyes showed life even though he was not real. Her face was close to his, she felt nothing. Her lips were a hair's breadth away, she felt nothing. Her lips touched the fake colt's, she still felt nothing. She pulled away, the figure dissapearing into the wind. This wasn't right, she should feel at least something, shouldn't she? She shook her head, deciding to clear the matter once and for all. An image suddenly appeared, a white unicorn filly with frizzy purplish-pink hair. It was one of Scootaloo's closest friends, Sweetie Belle. She looked at the visage of her friend, she looked stunning. A cute half-smile cocked on her face and her mane flowing in the spring breeze whistling through the meadow. She stepped forwards, a tingling sensation began in her gut at the realization of what she was about to do. She inched forwards, the sensation growing much stronger, almost unbearably so. She moved her face closer to her friend's, her breath coming out in short pants. She looked deep into the faux-fillies eyes, sparkling with imitation life, but the fact that it was a copy didn't matter right now. All that mattered was the moment. Their lips were an infitesemal distance apart, she could almost feel them on her. She shut her eyes, and pushed. A tingling sensation enveloped her lips, spreading quickly down her body. It felt magical. Like what all of the adults said kissing a colt should feel like. She leaned into the kiss, eyes still clamped shut. She let out a high-pitched moan of happiness. Eventually she ran out of breath and, reluctantly, let her lips pull away from those of the figure before her. She looked into the eyes of her friend, her facial expression had not changed, the cute half-smile still cocked adorably on her face. Scootaloo's lips twiched, she resisted the urge to let them pull into a grin. Her eyes widened. She had just kissed a filly! She swiped her hoof through the illusion, dispelling it like a cloud of smoke. She had liked kissing a filly! Scootaloo sank to her haunches, tears welling up in her eyes. She was a fillyfooler! She sunk her head to her hooves, tears rolling down her cheeks and onto the grass below. She was a freak Luna trotted down her corridor. Doors flanking the velvet carpeted hallway, each one leading to the dream of one of her little ponies. She smiled, it was good to be able to help her subjects, even in her sleep. She looked up to one of the doors at random, Scootaloo Mellowfeather it read. Luna smiled, remembering the filly she had helped conquer her nightmares and give a new big sister. She decided that it would be beneficial to see how the filly was doing, making sure that she was okay. Plus she had a soft spot for foals... Luna grinned and stepped through the door, walking directly into a large meadow filled with cattails, bathed in sunshine. She smiled, this filly certainly had an artistic imagination. Luna wandered through the meadow for a while. Just taking in the scenery, only absentmindedly looking for the filly this marvelous dreamscape belonged to. Luna's ears cocked as she heard something. They swivelled round to where the noise was coming from. It sounded like... sobbing? Luna's eyes widened as she realized that Scootaloo was in distress, she accelerated up to a gallop and rushed towards the source of the crying. Scootaloo raised her head as she heard hoofsteps, her cheeks still tear-streaked. Great she thought. Now I can't even control my own lucid dream She sank her head back into her hooves, not caring if anypony saw her like that. Luna stepped into the clearing and looked at Scootaloo, her eyes brimming with sympathy. She slowly trotted over to the small orange filly. Lowering herself down onto her haunches a few metres from the grief-stricken filly. "What do you want?" She asked, her voice raspy from crying. Luna didn't respond straight away, she just gazed into the poor filly's still-watery magenta eyes. "I just want to help you, young one." She said quietly, a motherly smile on her face. Scootaloo looked away, apparently in shame. "You can't help me... No one can..." Her head sunk back into her hooves again and she refused to look back at Luna. The Princess' comforting smile wavered at that, she had always prided herself on helping with the smaller problems while her sister dealt with all of the politics and bill-signing. If the little orange filly had a problem so bad that supposedly the Princess of the night herself couldn't help with it then it must have been serious... Nonsense Luna thought, doubting her self-confidence wasn't going to get her anywhere. "You could at least tell me what is wrong, child. I might be able to help, you never know." Luna persisted, trying to get a response out of the angsting orange filly in front of her. Scootaloo took her head out of her hooves to look at the Princess dead in the eye, no fear, but no cockiness either in those magenta orbs filled with despair. "I'm a freak..." She said, as she popped out of existence. Luna sighed as she found herself back in the corridor, standing in front of an empty space where the door to Scootaloo's dream had once stood. Luna lowered her head in failure and walked onwards through the never ending hallway of dreams. Scootaloo opened her eyes, the first grey rays of sunlight finding their way through the curtains and onto the clouds that made up the floor below. She could hear Rainbow Dash making a commotion in the kitchen, probably preparing breakfast. A little of the weight in Scootaloo's heart lifted as she remembered the day that Rainbow Dash had won custody of her. She had come to pick Scootaloo up for a flying lesson when she had saw the filly's father hitting her and abusing her. Rainbow had broken down the door and tackled the drunk stallion to the floor, pinning him down and saying that if he ever did anything bad to Scootaloo again she would make sure it would be impossible for him to have any more children. That night Scootaloo had slept over Dash's for the first time. In the morning Dash had told Scootalooo to go and hang out with her friends while she took care of some business. This continued for about a month. Scootaloo staying at Dash's every night. She insisted that Scootaloo couldn't go home. One day Dash had come home with the stupidest, happiest grin anypony in Equestria had ever seen. She had slammed a piece of paper on the table that said Dash now had custody of Scootaloo, her eyes had widened at the news. If that wasn't enough Dash then pulled out another piece of paper with the details of a restraining order put on Scootaloo's father from her, Dash, and the whole of Ponyville. Scootaloo had looked up at the mare that had just done the nicest thing anypony had ever done for her, without expecting a reward in return and even willingly putting her recources into it, with a dumb expression. Struggling to comprehend what had just happened. Before slamming into her new guardian at almost mach speed and wrapping her in a rib-crushing hug. "I love you so much Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo had exclaimed, not realizing what she had said until after she had said it. Rainbow just giggled and tousled the filly's mane. "I love ya too, Scoots" she had said. Scootaloo lay in bed, her memories being interrupted by an annoying ray of sunlight getting in her eyes. She started to tear up, what would Dash think of her if she knew she was a freak? The door to her room opened and Dash strutted in. "Rise and shine lazyponies! Celestia's not gonna wait for us!" She yelled, before looking at the expression of despair on Scootaloo's face. Her eyes widened as she realized that Scootaloo was about to cry. She shot over to the bed and gave the filly a bone-crushing hug. "It's okay..." She said. "Nothing can hurt you, it's fine..." Dash held Scootaloo out at arms length, looking into her eyes with a comforting smile. Despite the tears rolling down Scootaloo's face she still managed to crack a weak smile. "That's more like it!" Dash said, her grin growing happier. "Now, what's the matter?" Scootaloo looked at her big sister, at the comforting smile on her face and the kindness in her eyes. "I don't deserve your kindness..." Scootaloo muttered. A curious look appeared on Dash's face. "What? Why not?" Scootaloo's face screwed up as more tears started to roll down her face. "I'm just a fillyfooling freak!" She screamed, barging past Dash and out of her bedroom. Dash's jaw dropped and her eyes widened as she heard Scootaloo's outburst. "Scoots!" She cried out in shock. "No! Don't say anything! I don't deserve anything!" She yelled again as she leapt out of the door and started to plummet towards the ground. She straightened out and extended her wings, catching air easily and swooping worryingly close to the ground. She soared off into the sky, rapidly becoming smaller in front of Dash's eyes. "Scoots..." She mumbled under her breath as tears started to pool in the corners of her eyes. Author's Note Hey guys, I apologize for the long absence. It won't happen again. I finally got over my chronic writers block and managed to dredge this out of my head. I'm trying a different style this time, it'll be much more melancholy. I hope you all enjoyed it, hopefully more to come if this gets a good reception.
Chapter 2View OnlineFreakChapter 2Scootaloo alighted in an apple tree. Sitting in the branches, hidden by leaves, and looking out at the world. The world that she didn't want to live in. She looked down at her body. Her orange fur rippling in the light breeze. Her impressive wings, bigger than average, tucked against her sides. She was pretty by anyone's standards. She looked down at her body again. The body she didn't want to live in. Scootaloo felt tears welling up in her eyes, she didn't even try to stop herself. They rolled off her cheeks and splattered the bark below her. Bucking fillyfooling little freak! She winced at the words of her father, touching the back of her head where she still had a scar from where his horseshoe had cut into her. I deserved it... She smacked her head into the tree. I deserved every horrible thing that ever happened to me. She smacked her head into the tree again, making it shake and a few apples drop out. I'm just a horrible pony who no one will ever love. Who doesn't deserve to be loved. I don't deserve Rainbow Dash... Or Applebloom, or Sweetie Belle... Or any of them. I don't deserve anyone. She smacked her head into the bark again and again. Crimson liquid flowing down her face and into her eyes, mixing with her tears. Making the world swirl in front of her eyes, a red tinge acquired from her blood. She felt light headed, she probably had a concussion. I deserve it She looked down at the fields of Sweet Apple Acres from her vantage point. She could see somepony approaching with her clouded vision, thought through the haze of tears and blood it was impossible to tell who. Scootaloo wiped her eyes, the world suddenly jumping into focus. Big Mac was beneath the boughs of the trees, going about his business. A cart being pulled behind him. The yoke that no one ever saw him without perched on his back. He looked up into the trees, not for any discernable reason, and saw Scootaloo perched among the branches of one. At first he though nothing of it, she was probably just taking a nap. But as he continued looking he saw that she had blood flowing across her face from an open wound on her forehead. His eyes widened as he saw the injuries. He shrugged off the yoke and it hit the floor with a ground shaking thud. He rushed across to the tree and bucked it hard. Scootaloo tumbled out and he gracefully caught her on his back. He looked back to see the filly barely conscious, blood and tears smeared across her face. She had her face buried in his crimson coat, dampening his coat with the juices of despair. He looked around for a short second, catching his bearings. He bent his legs for a second and set off at a sprint to the farmhouse. "Granny!" Mac bellowed, his voice carrying easily to the farm house across the last orchard between him and the house. "Granny y'need ta help!" He called again, as an elderly green mare stepped out of the rustic farmhouse. "Ya don't need ta shout young'un! Ah'm right here!" She said in her croaky old voice. "Granny ya got ta help! Ah found Scootaloo in the orchard in one 'o the trees. She's in a bad way, ya got ta help!" Mac fired, turning around so Granny Smith could see the young orange filly perched on his back, blood still flowing freely from the gash on her head. The old lime mare's eyes widened as she saw the amount of blood on the filly's face and Mac's coat. "Well don't just stand there ya idjit! Get 'er inside!" She said. Mac rushed into the home and swept everything off the table, breaking several dishes in the process before laying her on it gently. Granny Smith came in with a first aid kit and some water. "Right, lets get this done" She said, rubbing her hooves together Scootaloo opened her eyes hesitantly. She was in a comfortable room in a bed. It wasn't her room because the bed was made of cotton and goose down, not clouds. She tried to move her head but a shooting pain in her skull stopped her. She let out a hiss of air through her teeth and groaned. The door creaked open and a big red stallion she recognized as Big Macintosh came into the dim room. "Yer awake huh?" He asked, a kind smile on his face. Why is everyone I know so bucking nice? Scootaloo asked herself as her eyes started to water again. "You should have just left me out there..." She mumbled, not wishing to go on. Mac's eyes widened. "You woulda died!" He said, taking a step towards her. "That's the point!" She yelled, her eyes streaming tears. She sank back into the bed as Mac looked at her with shocked eyes. "I'm nothing but a freak. I don't deserve to live..." She said, remembering the words spoken to her once. Bucking fillyfooling little freak! "...just a fillyfooling freak..." She mumbled, her voice hoarse with all the crying she had done. Mac's eyes widened even farther for a second before they were replaced with a look of barely contained rage. "Don't you ever talk about yourself like that young filly!" He yelled, his eyes ablaze. "You're a wonderful, pretty young filly with some of the best friends and family somepony could ask for! No one is going to care if you don't like colts!" He continued, stepping closer to the orange filly. "Who put that idea in your head? Who was it?!" He roared. "M-my father..." She stammered, terrified at Mac's outburst but also somewhat comforted by it. "That bastard..." Mac breathed, his eyes showing his rage. He finally stepped close enough to Scootaloo to give her a bone-crushing hug. "M-Mac..." Scootaloo blubbered, her eyes overflowing with tears. "Sshhh... It's okay, everything's okay." He said comfortingly. So many things had happened throughout the day that Scootaloo should have had more than enough on her mind. All she could think about as she drifted off to sleep however, was that she had never heard Big Mac speak so much.
Chapter 3View OnlineFreakChapter 3/Author's notes: I sincerely apologize for the long delay in updates. So much stuff has been happening lately, along with quite a bit of procrastination. There shouldn’t be any more waits for chapters quite as long as this one. I’ve also switched to Google docs to write these instead of the site editor, so expect a slight change in the style and layout of these chapters. I apologize again for the long wait, and I hope you all enjoy./ ____________________________________________ Scootaloo awoke to light filtering through the curtains, her mouth tasted horrible and she felt light-headed. She could hear voices downstairs, but she was still too disorientated from waking up to make out exactly what they were saying. One sounded like it belonged to Applejack, another’s Granny Smith’s. And one more... Rainbow Dash? “Oh no...” She thought, her stomach twisting in anxiety. “What’ll she think of me? What if she disowns me as her sister?” Scootaloo’s thoughts grew in a crescendo of worry and worse-case scenarios. “But Big Macintosh said that liking fillies was nothing to be ashamed of!” Part of her thought, the rest of her was not so easily reasoned with. “Big Macintosh doesn’t know anything! He was probably just trying to make me feel better, I bet he thinks I’m disgusting.” Scootaloo’s father’s words flashed in her mind again. “Fillyfooling little freak!” Scootaloo heard hoofsteps coming up the stairs; she hid under the covers in a vain attempt at avoiding confrontation with Rainbow Dash. The door creaked open. “Scoots?” She heard Rainbow Dash’s voice say. “Leave me alone...” Scootaloo croaked, her voice harsh and cracked for lack of water. “Scoots please, I just wanna talk to you.” Dash said, approaching the bed in which Scootaloo lay. “No, Rainbow Dash please, I’m a freak, a crime against nature. I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve anyone. All of my friends are so wonderful and I don’t deserve them one bit. I’m a horrible pony. You can do so much better than me. Please just leave me alone...” She said, her voice cracking even more, tears streaming from her cheeks. “Scoots, you’re not a horrible pony.” Dash said, laying a hoof on Scootaloo’s shoulder. “You’re the sweetest and most hardworking filly I’ve ever met.” “Yeah, but I’m still a fillyfooler, no one’s gonna want to associate themselves with me. I’m a freak!” She said, shrugging Dash’s hoof off her shoulder. “But who cares about that? What you do in your own life, who you fall in love with, it’s no one’s business but yours!” Dash said, trying to coax Scootaloo out from under the covers. “But it’s wrong! Fillies should like colts!” Scootaloo shouted, her wings flaring like her temper. “Scootaloo, you love who you love, no one can change that! It doesn’t matter if you want a fillyfriend instead of a coltfriend, your friends and family will still love you.” Dash said, desperately trying to reach out to Scootaloo. “What about my Dad though? He hates me because I like fillies! How am I supposed to know if anyone else will react that way?” Scootaloo said, tears still running down her face. “Your Dad doesn’t matter! You don’t need him, you’ve got me, and you’ve got Applebloom and Sweetie Belle too!” Dash said, pulling Scootaloo into a hug. “I’ll always love you Scootaloo, no matter how uncool it sounds. You’re like a sister to me and I love you. I don’t care if you like fillies, do whatever makes you happy. Because that’s what I want, for you to be happy.” She explained, as Scootaloo wept into her mane. “Dash...” Scootaloo murmured, nestling herself as far into Dash’s mane as she could manage. “It’s okay Scoots, it’s okay... There’s nothing wrong with you. I promise. I really do.” Dash said, hugging Scootaloo as tight as she could. They lay there for a while, Dash muttering sympathetic and comforting words as Scootaloo wept. Weeping away everything that had happened to her: all the stress, all the heartache, all of the sadness; it flowed from her tear ducts as it washed away like the salty tears she cried. And then she was done crying. Just as soon as it had started it had stopped. For once, for the first time in weeks, she felt content. She felt as if the world was not going to crumble around her, she felt as if she could carry on without dragging herself out of bed. She felt tired. Even though she had slept, even though she had done nothing but sleep, she felt tired. So she did what anypony does when they’re tired, she slept. ____________________________________________________ Scootaloo was strolling through a field full of cattails, the sun was shining, and the smell of flowers and freshly cut grass was in the air. On the other side of the field there was a pony. It was a mare; no, not a mare, more of a filly... but she was the most beautiful filly Scootaloo had ever seen. She was slim, fragile, yet she had a presence. She was there. Nothing Scootaloo had ever seen had ever been more there. Her coat was of a pristine white, shimmering impossibly like silver in spite of the golden sunlight. Her mane was a pale fuchsia, falling in bouncy curls down the side of her face. Sweet Celestia her face. Her eyes were of a pale emerald that rimmed the deepest black, through which you could see into her very being. The grin on her face was joyful and mischievous, yet despite its childishness it still managed to be absolutely stunning. The pony was Sweetie Belle, and she was breathtaking. Scootaloo stood stock still, staring in awe at Sweetie Belle. “She’s beautiful.” Said a voice from behind her, full of poise and regality. “Yeah, she really is.” Said Scootaloo, as the Princess of the night stepped out from behind her. “You are aware you are dreaming, no?” She asked, sitting down on her haunches beside Scootaloo, even then towering above her. “Yeah, I know this is a dream. Ever since you visited me to get rid of the nightmares, having lucid dreams is a normal occurrence for me.” “Will you not go and talk to her?” Luna asked, cocking her head towards Scootaloo. The filly in question laughed. “I wish I could, she’s one of my best friends. She’s beautiful, smart, funny, kind... She’s... perfect...” Scootaloo said, her eyes growing wistful. “Ah, my dear. As they say these days, you have it bad.” Said the Princess. Scootaloo giggled at her slightly awkward use of modern terms. “Yeah...” She murmured. “I guess I do.” She turned away from Luna, and strolled to the other side of the field. Away from Sweetie Belle. “In my opinion you should go and talk to her.” Luna called out to Scootaloo. “You should go and tell her how you feel.” “Well, that’s easier said than done, Princess.” Scootaloo called back. Still walking away from the filly on the other side of the field. “You know, child, I do have a certain affinity for these kinds of things.” The Princess said, her long strides letting her catch up to Scootaloo in only a few steps. “I am the princess of the night, and even if Cadence is now the Princess of love, that title once also belonged to me. I am well versed in the manners of love. Both the side of the heart and the more...” Luna blushed slightly. “...physical side.” Scootaloo’s face flushed a bright red. “Well, I definitely could have gone without knowing that...” She said, hiding her gaze from Luna. “So, here I am, standing in a field with the goddess of sex trying to give me advice on my love life while I’m still trying to come to terms with being a lfillyfooler.” Scootaloo looked up at Luna with eyes full of confusion. “I really have no idea how I got into this situation.” “Well, when you put it like that it does seem rather strange doesn’t it? But don’t worry, I’m sure it will all work out in the end.” The two of them continued strolling for a while. They did not converse, but nor was there a need to. When the time came, Luna turned her head to Scootaloo and smiled. There was no need for words, she understood. Scootaloo woke up.
