Birth of a Guardian

This, my dear readers, is the tale of the arrival of a strange new creature in the fair land of Equestria, a human would you believe? This is his journey of adjustment and resettlement in our land from his own distant realm. This is the story of the birth of the first human guardian in Equestria. This, my dear readers, is my story...

The first thing I noticed upon entering this land was the feeling of dry dirt pressed against me cheek. My vision blurred into action as I pulled my arms closer to me in my daze. Dirt scrapped against the palm of my hand as I pressed it firmly to the ground, pushing myself away from the surface. The sun blazed fiercely as I fought to regain my footing and shielded its brunt from my eyes. Nausea fought to taint me as I felt the heat of sunlight wash over me. At first I blamed the overwhelming palate of colours that struck me on the misty daze that coated my vision. I began to notice blurred and faded images move around me as I began to straighten myself out.

My ears rung out with a mixture of the thumping of my heartbeat and the worrying sound of rushing water which began to grow thinner and disperse as I took notice of the muffled voices around me. I inhaled sharply to try and regain my composure and dispel the growing nausea. This however made me lurch over in a chocking cough from the unfamiliar air, it was so… clean and pure. Was I in the countryside? No… this air was completely alien. Nowhere I had been in my life had air this fresh and crisp. My coughs had caused the nearby shapes to fidget and murmur loader as I looked up to them. The gate on my hearing broke open as I heard shrieks of “monster!”, “beast!” and “RUN!” I quickly shot up as I forced myself together in a panic to look around me. Adrenaline pumped into my aching head as I checked to see if I was in danger. Finally I could see my surroundings. Finally I could see the shapes in their true form. The air was more alien to me than I thought… I definitely was not in the countryside.

This had to be some kind of joke. Was I drunk? Did someone slip me something? I had to be dreaming… or was I dead?

Stampeding around me with worried and fearful looks of dread plastered across their faces. Cartoon ponies, pastel cartoon ponies everywhere. They were running away from something. As my eyes darted amongst them in disbelief I took notice that some were looking right at me. My eyes meeting theirs as they galloped past me anywhere they could. I could the panic and dread across their huge eyes staring at me in as much disbelief as I felt myself. Was I the danger? Or was I just some oddity that they took notice of in their escape. I spun around to check behind me, expecting to see some hell-spawned demon or a rampaging titan. I would believe anything I saw in this situation but my eyes were met with the same behind me of more pastel cartoon ponies charging around as if the world was ending. Would be just my luck that the minute I arrive in an alien world filled with cartoon ponies that it would blow up…

What was the danger? Should I run? Where would I run to in this place? Is this place even real? All these questions flushed into my already pounding head as I struggled to make sense of the situation. I thought of trying to ask one of the passing “ponies” what was happening but what would I say to a scared cartoon pony running for its life? Do these things even speak English?

I heart was thumping away in my chest as I attempted to look for a hiding place or somewhere to run but my feet refused to respond as I was still stunned at trying to process what the hell was going on. As the ground shacking rumbling on the stampede faded away, I noticed a distant sound. It was like air being cut at a very low pitch. I turned in the direction of the sound, looking up into the sky. My eyes picked out a dot streaking across the blue sky leaving a faint trail behind it. Is that a freackin’ jet plane?!

The dot arched across the distant plane of the sky and began to direct its path straight at the street I was standing on. Blood rushed to the top of my head as I realised that this must be the thing those ponies where running from... and its coming right at me…

I tried to turn and run as fast as I could but my body was in no condition to make a sprint for safety, I still felt like I had just been through a grinder. It made no difference however as my body decided it would stage a mutiny against me and freeze up like it was curious to see what would happen. I felt like a deer in the headlights as the dot rocketing closer and closer to me. It began talking shape as it zeroed in on me. I could vaguely make out the shape similar to the ponies from earlier as I clenched my eyes shut and turned as I prepared myself for the hammer like blow that would inevitably come down on me.

The air that I had fought to breathe in was cruelly blasted out of me as I was smashed back to the surface.

The object catapulted me off my feet and a good few yards down the street as it struck me in the abdomen. It stayed with me on my journey through the air as it tackled me to the ground. I gained a sharp taste of copper in my mouth as I tried to clutch my stomach and force the alien air back into my winded chest. I could not however as I squinted my eyes open to see my arms were being pinned down by a rather heavy blunt force. I felt like hell as my skull renewed its pounding rhythm with enthusiasm. The sun was being blocked by the being on top of me. The sunlight was creating a kind of glowing aura around the form that prevented me from seeing it clearly. That and I was struggling to keep my consciousness. I could make out a large pair of violet eyes glaring down on me with fury.

“What the hey are you… ”

The being lowered its head closer as if to get a better look as it asked in a flat tone of voice that seemed not to expect an answer. I could tell the underlying tone of anger was being tamed behind a flood gate in its almost gruff feminine voice.

What the hell was happening to me…

I struggled to look up at the blue creature, meeting its sharp gaze with my dazed and unfocused one. I don’t know what I was thinking or what it was at but I began to give a weak laugh through my winded lungs. I must have gone insane; it was the only explanation for all of this. But then again that hit felt way to real to be imaginary. Maybe I got hit by a car? It certainly felt like it. The creature must have taken my chuckle the wrong way as it clenched its teeth and narrowed it’s almost none existing brow.

“Are you laughing at me?!”

It demanded in a fierce tone. I stupidly chuckled again and responded,

“… a little bit.”

For an instant the being looked shocked, as if by the fact that I could talk. Unfortunately this dispersed as quickly as it appeared to be replaced by one of utter fury as snarled and glared down at me in a cartoonish fashion. Well it was a cartoon creature right? I was snapped back to “reality” as the sense of danger was restored by the being rearing back and slamming what I discovered were its front hooves firmly on the ground at both sides of my head. Oh shit… if I’m going to die I don’t want it to be in this place under to hooves of a cartoon pony. Although I had to admit I would never have seen that coming…

“Alright, alright! Ease up man!”

I responded as I held up my freed arms in a defensive gesture.

“Na’ Rainbow Dash just calm ya’ self down n’ let the poor thing up”

I heard another voice call out as the blue pony turned its head away from me and in the direction of the new voice. The new voice also sounded feminine but gentler than this Rainbow Dash’s voice with a southern like country accent accompanying it. I turned my head to also face in the direction of the new voice. From my sideways view on the ground I saw an orange pony with long blonde hair tied in a, rather ironic, ponytail and crowned with a Stetson hat like out of those westerns my dad used to watch.

“Applejack are you crazy?! This thing could be dangerous! What if it hurts somepony?  We can’t just let it go!”

The blue pony responded to its friend in a strained and shocked voice as it maintained its position over me. So those ponies thought I was the danger… no wonder they looked at me like that.

“Rainbow if it’s so dangerous then why was it just cowering under y’all?”

Oww… my pride…

The one called Rainbow Dash looked back down at me with a critical look. All I could do was to simply look back into its eyes.

“Iffin its dangerous n’ all then we’ll tie it up to be safe”

The orange pony offered, holding up a coil on thick rope. Well… I guess it beats being pinned under an angry blue cartoon pony called ‘Rainbow’...