My Little Pony: Friendship is Fourth and One

Chapters

Are you serious?
Yeah, I suck at chapter names...
Maybe I need a chapter namer guy?
The pending madness
Double the fun, double the stress
Bad news, or dead news?
Apologies on thin ice
Reversed feelings
Duck, duck, PONY!
Wake up and smell the magic
A burning sensation
Country loves techno
Love is like a bet
Verbal warfare
Let the games...
.....divide?
Canvas of the future to be
Breaching's a new life
Idea Recall
Meet the blue team
Day for making some Z's
Variety of the damned
Really though?
Wake me up, when September ends
Dark music dealings
1 Brawl + 1 Night = Apologies
The difference between living and dying, can be just a couple seconds.

Are you serious?

Luna bursted through the doors into Celestia's room. "Tia! Wake up!"

The sun goddess stirred in her bed. "What is it? It's not time to raise the sun yet, is it?"

"No! Come quick! Something has happened!" Luna used her magic to lift her older sister out of her bed and to her hooves. "Hurry!"

Celestia looked at her younger sister. "You performed the spell, didn't you?"

"No time for that, Tia! We have to hurry!" Luna was anxious, jogging in place by the door.

"Alright, let's go see." Celestia said as she levitated her crown onto her head. Lu-Lu, what did you do?

As they neared Luna's room, it was obvious everypony knew something was wrong. Guards were slowly moving towards the room, while nobles stuck their heads out of their rooms, looking for an explanation as to what woke them from their slumber. Blueblood stepped out of his room as soon as he saw Celestia. "Auntie! What was that noise?"

Celestia looked at the white unicorn. "It is of no concern to you, Blueblood. Please, go back to sleep." He glared at Celestia before eventually shuffling back into his room. Celestia looked over to Luna. "It isn't a problem, right?"

"Well..." "Luna, tell me what happened."

Luna sighed. "Well, I tried the portal again. This time, I got it open. I saw a deer just standing there, then, wolves started chasing it!"

Celestia looked at Luna. "So, our problem is a deer?"

"No! The deer jumped over a fence, which had these nasty spikes on it! Then, two bright lights appeared. It was a red machine, much louder and much faster than any of ours! I believe it tried to avoid the deer, then slid, and started rolling."

"So, all we have to deal with is an alien machine?"

Luna looked around, making sure nopony was listening in on their conversation. "I think something's in it! It had a line of fur on its head, and it was bleeding!"

Celestia started to walk faster. "It was bleeding?"

Luna nodded. "Yes, from its head. It made a noise that sounded painful... and it looked like it was in pain too!"

Royal guards, both solar and lunar stood outside the room. "Your Majesties!" They said, all bowing. "We decided it would be best not to touch the red machine, nor the creature inside, until directed otherwise. We did, however, recover this." One of the unicorns levitated a white and black rectangle from behind a pegasus' wing. "What is it?" The sisters asked in unison. "We don't know, but it seems to light up with a storm when we apply pressure in one of two places." The unicorn pressed on the side of the rectangle. The strange device lit up, showing a rather large storm with lightning and rain. It also held the time. Eleven twenty-nine.

"It's a clock!" Luna said, moving closer to the device. "But why does it have an envelope on it?" Luna asked, touching the device with her hoof.

"We are unsure. When we try to open it, it is blocked by a pass code of sorts. Which is another thing... its alphabet is the exact same as ours!

Celestia looked at the strange device. "Can you open it?"

"Of course! We have code-breakers on their way now."

Celestia composed herself. "Alright, then let's take a look at it." She walked forward, opening the door. Her jaw almost hit the floor at the sight.

There it was, just as Luna said. A strange red alien machine, with a strange creature inside. Luna's eyes got immensely bigger. "Tia! He's bleeding through his... are those... bandages?"

Celestia looked in through the shattered glass. Sure enough, the strange creature had wrappings on his arms. The cuts underneath were starting to bleed. "Luna, I think we should get it to a hospital."

"Are you crazy?!?!"

"There are doctors there than can maybe help it! From the looks of it, it is in a massive deal of pain." Celestia looked at the creature's face.

Mainly where his eyes should be. They darted left and right under the closed lids. "Luna, while I get it to a doctor, see if you can get into its dreams."

______________________________________________________________________________

Pinkie sat straight up in her bed. Twitchy tail, waking up in the middle of the night, itchy arms, and craving for strawberry cupcakes... that can only mean one thing! Pinkie gasped. I wonder if I should tell Lyra she was right?

___________________________________________________________________________

"Green eight! Green eight! Seeeet... Go! Go!" The QB dropped back from the line, the linemen all taking steps back with him. DJ did the same, taking a step backwards. DJ's nightmares and dreams, were not like his fellow team and classmates. His nightmares consist of games. His sophomore year, DJ had a pars fracture in his L5 vertebrate. He was able to hide it for almost two games, before falling on the ground, screaming in pain and agony.

So, while DJ would stand on the sidelines, watched his team get better without him, he decided he would pick up something. Lucid dreaming. It wasn't the easiest task in the world, but after weeks of questioning reality, he was finally able to control his dreams. This was both a gift and a curse.

Since DJ couldn't play, he would instead memorize game film, every play, every position. Then, at night, he would duplicate it, only with him in his position. This came to be his worst enemy his junior year when he was able to play once again. His subconscious would remember every play, remembering everything he saw. Then, at night, would turn them into nightmares. DJ would read the wrong play, and mess up horridly. Losing the game. He would always wake up right after the play, too. He got little to no sleep at night after games. He eventually had to start taking muscle relaxers to stay asleep.

As DJ dropped back into coverage, he saw something out of the corner of his eye. The D-end didn't get hands on, allowing a linemen to have a straight shot for DJ. He knew if he tried to go around, it would take too much time. He could only run straight for the three-hundred pound beast that was closing the distance between them.

DJ's right arm slammed into the linemen's left shoulder, throwing him off just a bit. Then, DJ lowered his left shoulder, and in a ripping motion, brought his left arm up, getting past the block. Dip, rip, and get skinny!

But now he was confused. The QB and his line dropped back into pass, yet he just came for me. That has to be a penalty! Unless... DJ looked over to his right, just in time to see the QB dump the ball to the running back. A perfect screen. He tried to adjust his path, but with no luck.

Touchdown Guthrie.

___________________________________________________________________________

Luna watched the violence repeat itself over... and over... and over again. The same twenty-two bipeds lashing out at each other in a vivid display of hate. She began to notice patterns. Is it a game? They have a brown ball, and it looks like whichever team has it, the other tries to prevent them from getting to the blue or white area. But what's with the armor? Is it some kind of battle? It was hard at first, but she eventually found the creature that the dream belongs to. He was just a little taller than her, but much wider. He wore a blue helmet, which the front looked as if it had been to Tartarus and back. There were “N”s on the sides of his helmet, however faded. The armor on his shoulders was a solid white, save the dirt stains, and held the number fifty-four. He had fresh white bandages on his arms, and wrapping on his ankles. He wore black gloves, and would constantly look at a black band on his wrist. He wore white pants, with padding around his knees, thighs, and hips. You're just armed to the teeth, aren't you? About that time, the creature reached into his mouth, pulling out a black mouthpiece.

"I wonder if I should approach it?" Luna said to herself out loud. She battled in her head for several minutes, before deciding it would be best to tell it what was happening. "I've just got to be slow, explain where he's at in the mind. Tell him it's a dream."

________________________________________________________________________________________

"Cloud it up! Cloud it up!" DJ yelled to the corners as he waved a hand in front of his face. He started to slow his hand down, examining his fingers. Eleven blurry fingers.... that means... DJ pointed at the ground, where a large pole shot straight through the air. It put a smile on his face. Perfect! DJ started taking his pads off while a large metal door forming in front of him. His 'Shit Just Got Real' room. When he had all his stuff off, he started for the door, but was stopped when he heard a feminine voice.

"Wait!"

DJ turned, just a little though so his voice would carry better, kind of annoyed by the dream character. "I'm busy. Go away." He said, turning back to the door, expecting the voice to be gone.

"No, wait! Listen to me!" It said again.

DJ turned all the way around. "Look, lady I..." he was speechless from what he saw. A dark blue pony with wings and a horn. None other than Princess Luna. "Huh, this is different." He said, again turning for the door.

"Listen! This is a dream!" She yelled at him.

He kinda laughed. "You don't say? I thought that doors could just materialize out of nowhere!"

"Wait... you know?"

DJ was officially annoyed. Why is she not going away? "Listen, you are going to disappear..... Now!" He jumped up, turning around, only to get a confused look in return. "Alright, fuck it!" DJ formed two AA-12s in his hands. "Hasta la vista, baby!" He said as he pulled the triggers for the fully automatic shotguns. The pony disappeared into shadows as the shotgun shells ripped through the air, leaving a black smoke. "Well, that's different." He said, tossing the shotguns to the side, walking through the metal door.

____________________________________________________________________________

Celestia stared at the alien on the hospital bed. Its clothes had been taken off, and doctors were now cleaning its wounds. What is your story? She observed the scars that seemed to be mainly around its appendages. She had instructed the doctors not to use magic, as they did not know the affects it may have on it. The doctor continued to remove clothes, reaching the undergarments. So.... you're a male... she thought as she looked at the fifth appendage. Her thoughts were cut off when she heard Luna screaming from across the room. Celestia looked over to her sister, who had tears streaming down her face, trying to curl into a tight ball.

"Luna, what is it? What did you see?"

"S-so m-m-much p-pain!" She got out, closing her eyes.

Celestia tried to comfort her sister. What could possibly be in that head that she couldn't handle? "Lu-Lu, what happened?"

Luna wiped tears from her eyes. "I-I tried to talk with it. He shunned me off.... but I persisted, trying to talk with him..." She closed her eyes to stop the tears. "B-but he knew. He knew it was a dream! Like he had done it before!"

"So, what happened?"

"H-he conjured two large metal pieces into his hands. When he turned to me, they started to make loud explosions, spitting fire at me!" She curled up even tighter. "It hurt so bad, Tia. I don't want to go back."

Celestia rubbed her hoof through Luna's mane. "Do not worry, you don't have to." She felt a tap on her shoulder, she turned to see a doctor with a notepad. "What's the problem?"

The doctor cleared his throat. "He has a very serious concussion, as well as multiple broken broken bones. He has some internal bleeding, and will need stitches on the larger cuts. He also has a massive amount of scar tissue around his right hip." The doctor lowered his notepad. "Princess, it's pretty easy to say, whatever this thing is, he was a fighter. And fought quite often, we believe. Just looking at the amount of muscle and size, he cared about his health. He was covered in dirt and sweat, suggesting he just finished fighting, the lactic acid buildup in his body confirms this, as well along with the bandages on his arms."

Celestia looked over the alien on the table. "Will he live?"

"Hard to say, he has been through a lot. But he looks like a fig..." His speech was cut off by the alien on the table.

It sat straight up, eyes wide open, veins popping from all over its body. It let out a loud "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!" before falling back into a state of unconsciousness.

The whole room was silent, looking at the strange creature in fear and curiosity. "Has he had an outburst like that before?"

"No."

Luna finally spoke. "W-what about the red machine?"

Celestia regained herself. Luna, what did you bring to our world? Let us go see what our scientists have discovered."

Luna gave a nod as they left the room. Luna looked back at the alien as doctors continued to monitor its health, fear in her eyes.

"Oh, Princess!" All the scientists bowed as Celestia and Luna entered the room. The red machine had been moved to the center, multiple things in assorted piles littered the room. "We have much to report!"

"Very well, what have you found?" Celestia asked as Luna walked over the machine.

"Well, here, we found a package that contains multiple things that resemble music records, only these are much smaller."

"How many were in the package?"

"Around thirty. All with different pieces of art on them." The scientist levitated four of the silver disks into the air. "Like these. The two on my left have very intricate designs, 'The Offspring' and 'Eminem'. While these two, are just white, with 'calm' and 'angry' written in black."

"Have you found a way to work them?"

The scientist shook his head. "Afraid not, we have no knowledge of how they work. There may be a device that could work it, but we have yet to find it. Would you like to see what else we found?"

"Yes." Celestia said, she looked over to Luna, who was halfway inside the machine, looking at all the different things. The glass had been picked up, so there was no longer the threat of being cut.

The scientist stopped in front of another pile, this of what looked to be a set of armor. "We found this on the other side of the machine, opposite where he was sitting, along with two other bags, a large dark blue, and a small black. Both with a white symbol in the middle."

Celestia looked at the armor, it was a light grey with straps, strings, and scratches all over them. A white garment laid out beside it. As well as a pair of shoes with large spikes, tall black socks, a dark grey piece of armor that looked like his undergarments, and another set of white garments, but had armor on the ends, blue stripes down the sides, and looked like the pants the alien was wearing. "This is his armor? It doesn't look very efficient." She levitated the helmet up to her, the different colored scratches and chunks missing was actually rather intimidating.

"That's something we don't understand either. If this really is his armor that he would use for battle." He looked over at the machine. "And machines like this are common." He looked back at the Princess. "Either this is for recon, or there are even more pieces to the puzzle."

Luna poked her head out of the machine, eyes getting wide at the sight of the armor. "Hey! I've seen that before!" She said as she tried to hurry and jump out of the machine. Little did she know, she hit the power button on the red stereo. Loading the 'bass' disk into its proper position.

Celestia looked over to her sister. "In his dreams?"

Luna started nodding. "Yeah, he and twenty others wore the same armor. Only, there was two different colors, this white, and a blue." The stereo set the disk into place, verifying the connection with the custom capacitor and seperate battery needed to power the two subwoofers and four kicker speakers that would soon come to life.

"Were they fighting?"

Luna hesitated. "It looked more like they were playing a game..."

Celestia started to talk, when a violent noise filled the room. All the scientists ran over to the machine, the bass rattling their bones. Everypony in the room fell silent as a female voice entered.

Yo, Skrill! Drop it hard!

The entire room started shaking as the subs in the back of the machine pounded at maximum volume. A doctor ran into the room, tapping Celestia on the shoulder. "We have a problem!" He yelled over the machine's noise.

.______________________________________________________________________________________

DJ started to slowly wake. His head was pounding, he had no idea where he was, he was rather pissed at himself for letting the stupid concussion make his mind wander, and misjudged the distance from him and the deer. He could have easily just applied the brakes, and missed it completely. He rolled onto his side, vomiting a large amount of water and spaghetti onto the floor. Fuck, that tasted horrible coming back up... his eyes opened to see rows of beds. Well, this isn't Normal Regional, I know that for sure. He felt a slight tug from his arm, he looked over to see fluids going down a long tube into his arm. He groaned. It had better be Morphine!

He laid his head back on the pillow. Wait... something is wrong. He lifted his head to the opposite wall. Chairs, and every one empty. I know I had my wallet and phone on me. Where's Mom and Dad? He cleared his throat. "'Hey!" He yelled. It hurt. He laid his head back down. He looked at the ceiling fan. He had to look away. Damn, this is worse than when the doctor gave me Tramadol! He groaned, turning his head to see a window. He pondered his options. I could either lay in the comfortable bed, and wait until a nurse or doctor comes by, or get up and risk pulling the fluids out of my arm and possibly falling over to see where I'm at? He continued to stare at the window. Fuck it! He slowly eased himself out of the bed. He looked down to see himself completely naked. He grabbed the pillow, putting it over his area, making his way toward the window, carrying the fluid bag above his head.

He had to sit down a couple times, he could feel his bones shifting inside his body. So, this is what Wahl felt like when he shattered his leg? DJ was just five feet away from the window, when an all too familiar feeling overwhelmed him. "Ah, God dammit." He said as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. His body fell to the floor, his head somehow landing on the pillow.

The doctor assigned to watch him walked through the door with another bag of fluids. He screamed when he saw the body near the window.

___________________________________________________________________________________

Celestia had a bubble around the machine, stopping the noise, but not the vibrations from the bass. "So, you're telling me he tried to jump out the window?"

"It appeared like it."

Luna walked up to Celestia. "But, that doesn't make any sense! If he was trying to jump out the window, why would he carry the fluids?"

"I honestly don't know the answer."

Celestia sighed. "Alright, please watch him closer thisI time."

"Yes, Princess!" He said as he left the room.

"Princess! I think we found part of the creature's diet!" A scientist yelled. Celestia and Luna walked over to the grey unicorn. "We found a rather large bag of a white powder, after tests to see if safe, when put a little in water, has a flavor similar to vanilla."

Celestia levitated the bag up to her level. "Whey protein?" She rotated the bag. "Two scoops contain just as much protein as a large chicken breast....." Celestia lowered the bag. "Well, that confirms the meat eating theory...."

Luna gulped. "So, since this is a supplement of meat... could we give this to him, and he still be happy?"

CelestiaI levitated a small black and green bottle out of the bag. One-hundred percent creatine? "Very possibly. We still want to show kindness, but ready if it shows acts of violence."

The pounding of the bass slowly lowered. Luna turned to the machine, a scientist smiling. "Incredible! This knob controls the volume of the.... music?"

"It sounded a lot like the music that would be played at clubs, though I've never heard of anypony named 'Skrill.'" Luna said.

Celestia looked at the grey unicorn. "Any luck on breaking the code?"

He sighed. "Afraid not. After so many attempts at the code, the device locks up, not allowing us to enter for longer and longer periods of time."

"Then don't worry about it. Work on the more pressing matters." Celestia looked at the small black bag. "What's in that?"

"We were about to open it, actually!" The unicorn trotted over to the bag, slowly opening the top, as if it was booby trapped. His eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. "Princess, we hit the jackpot!" He levitated the contents out, multiple books, both thick and professional, and thin notebooks with papers sticking out in every direction. "There is so much knowledge to be obtained from this bag alone!"

Celestia picked two of the books off the ground, reading the titles aloud. "To Kill a Mockingbird, and two thousand twelve Noble Athletics defensive playbook." She eyed the second. It was only about fifteen pages, and looked more like a binder. She opened it first. "Black seven, Maniac A, Evil." She stared at the strange Xs and Os with their arrows pointing in different directions. "Black ten, bring the house." She said, noticibg multiple arrows pointing straight at the middle of the page.

. Luna walked up behind her sister. "Black ten... He said that in his dream once! He was screaming it at the other creatures with him!"

Celestia stared at the cover again. "If that's true, then we may not be dealing with a killing monster, but instead, an athlete."

"What about all his scars, though?" Luna asked.

. Celestia looked over at the armor. "You said he was wearing that?"

"Yes..."

"Maybe his sport is just more violent than ours." Celestia let out a long yawn. "I have to raise the sun in a few hours. I am going to get some rest."

"Of course!" Luna said.

______________________________________________________________

******SATURDAY MORNING******

Celestia had just risen the sun onto the land of Equestria. She made her way back to the throne room. Nobles will no doubt be wondering about last night. Celestia let out a mental sigh. Just tell them not to worry, and everything will be fine. About ,that time, a doctor ran up to Celestia. "Princess! Princess! He's awake!"

Celestia didn't know how to react. "Alright, have you tried to communicate?"

"A little. He thinks he is on some very serious medications, giving him hallucinations."

Celestia started walking with the doctor. "Hallucinations?"

"He thinks he is in a place he called Oklahoma. He calls the machine we have been tampering with his 'truck.' And he wants his 'cell phone.'" The doctor sighed. "He also wants a copy of a newspaper, from another place called 'Guthrie.'"

"Maybe we can get him one of those things? This 'cellphone' you said, did he describe it?"

"He called it a 'GS3.' Said it was in a black and white case. Background a thunderstorm."

So it's called a cell phone? "That was with him in the mac... truck. We can get that to him no problem. The papers, however..."

"I understand. I will tell him we can get one of the things. He is also eating, a fair amount of fruits. Mainly apples."

"Good. Then maybe he won't eat us." Celestia said with a small grin.___________________________________________________________________

"Damn, how fucking stupid are y'all? You are doctors yet you don't even know what a cellphone is!" DJ stated as he pointed at the doctor across the room with a bushy moustache. "And you, you were the one that gave me this medication, and now my subconscious is playing tricks on me!" He threw his hands to the sides. "I have no idea where I'm at! I don't have my phone to call my mama, and because I denied that freshie a brohoof, these drugs are making me pay!" DJ threw his middle fingers into the air. "Fuck you, universe!" He then proceeded to vomit into a tin bucket by his bed.

"Please, calm down. We're trying to help you." A nurse said as she set another tray of food in front of him.

DJ let out a sigh. "You're right. I'm just a little sore, and exited is all."

"Exited? Care to explain?" The nurse asked. The room got still as DJ started his story.

"Well, you see. My team, for the past few years, has been a disaster. No one did their jobs. Always arguing. And it showed. On the field, we looked like a pile of shit. We would miss blocks, misread plays, penalties, all that junk. But this year… This year was different."

"How so?" The nurse asked. None of them noticed Celestia standing in the doorway.

"We broke everything down. Us seniors, we came up with an idea. We wanted a ring. The state championship ring. So, the day after our meeting, we went back to the field, and got everyone to sit down. We said. 'Alright, listen up! We don't know about you, but we want to win games! We don't like losing, and we sure as hell aren't going to let this brand new stadium go to waste! Seniors, you remember Chick freshmen year! DJ remembers it! It haunts him every week!

"'Hartman hurt his leg, and DJ was the only one that put enough heart into it to play. He wasn't the biggest, or the fastest, but he knew how to use leverage. And he played with everything he had! Who remembers what happened? One person. One person let their emotions get to them. We were down by one point. Three seconds left. Ball on the thirty. Talon was ready to kick the game winning field goal. But what happened?! The ball was hiked. Way too high, and way too fast. All so he could hit the person across from him first. John-John bobbled the ball. He had to run. And he didn't fucking make it!

"'So, one person. One person didn't play for the sport. One person didn't give it their all, and it tore is apart. Now, we stand here. Urging you, to PLEASE, play with all your heart. Don't let the other colors distract you.... We are forming a new football team. The Noble Bear's football team has been cut off. However, THE Noble Bear's FOOTBALL team, just arrived. If you want to play with us, you have to give it your all, all the time.'" DJ let out a small sigh, with a smile. "We went undefeated."

"That's amazing!" The nurse said.

"Yes. It is!" Celestia said, drawing the eyes of all the creatures in the room.

DJ looked around at all the bowing ponies. "Erm... I know these drugs are strong... but they aren't that strong, are they?"

Celestia levitated the phone to DJ. "There may be something you need to know..."

DJ unlocked his phone in a matter of seconds. "Huh, Tyler texted me last night." He said. "Damn, no signal!" He held the phone in the air, looking for reception.

"Listen, I have something that needs to be said."

"Alright, yes?"

"The 'drug' in the bag, what do you think it is?"

DJ looked over to the clear liquid. "I dunno, a strong dosage of Morphine?"

Celestia let out a sigh. "The fluid in the bag is just to keep you hydrated."

DJ started laughing. "Good one, doc!" He proceeded to vomit into the tin even more. "That was funny!"

"It wasn't a joke..." Celestia said in a monotonous voice.

DJ's laughter stopped. "Wait. Where are we? Right now?"

"Canterlot, Equestria." DJ just stared at the white sun goddess. She can't be serious. No way I'm re... well, I'm out. DJ's eyes rolled into the back of his head.

That wasn't exactly the answer he was looking for.

________________________________________

Edited by Sanity!

Thank you so much!

Yeah, I suck at chapter names...

"One!"

"Two!"

"Win!"

"For you!"

"Three!"

"Four!"

"Win!"

"Some more!"

"Five!"

"Six!"

"Win!"

"For chicks!"

"Seven!"

"Eight!"

"Winning!"

"Is great!"

"Nine!"

"Ten!"

"Win!"

Again!"

"AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN!" The team cried out. DJ held his helmet up into the mass of players. "Bears on three!"

"One! Two! Three! BEARS!" The team cried. DJ jogged over to the sidelines. Never walk on the field. He grabbed a water, allowing the liquid to flow down his practice jersey. He felt a tap on his pads, he turned to see Tyler, Kendrick, and Corben.

"Hey, we're going over to Kyle's house. He's in a lot of pain right now." Tyler said.

DJ was confused. "Pain? What happened?"

Corben had a look of shock on his face. "You didn't hear?" DJ shook his head. "Dude, his mom died just a couple hours ago!"

DJ looked around. "Are you serious? How?"

"Breast Cancer." Kendrick said. "We were on our way over to see if he needed anything."

"Oh, yeah man. 'Course I'll come."

The dream blurred, leaving DJ on the sidelines as the offense took the field. DJ started playing with the purple ribbon around his wrist. Come on, boys! For Roni! He looked over, to see a skinny receiver, not in his shoulder pads and helmet. But in shorts and a T-shirt. Water in his eyes. Wow. I don't know what to call that. His mother lost her battle with cancer yesterday, and he is here on the sidelines with us! DJ walked over to Kyle, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Listen, I didn't really know her, and I can't say I know understand what you're going through. But to be here, and now. That takes a lot." Kyle just nodded. "Remember, if there's anything we can do, just tell us."

Kyle cleared his throat. "She didn't want it to be losing, but just another obstacle in her way to Him."

The dream blurred again, leaving DJ outside a church. Ryan South and Walker, Dustin Staats, Kendrick, Corben, Tyler, and Shrabel all in a circle. Their purple collared shirts itching their necks. It was Noble, most of the people either didn't go to church, or wore T-shirts when they did. But this was different. A teammate, a brother, lost his mother to a deadly disease. The most formal dressing was required. And purple was her favorite color.

Tyler looked over his shoulder when he heard a car door shut. "What the fuck is he wearing..." he said.

Everyone looked over to Dylan Moreno. The douche linemen was wearing a yellow T-shirt with black shorts. "Moreno, what are you doing?"

He grabbed the dip from his lip, throwing it onto the grass. "Coach said it was mandatory. Here I am."

"You better have a purple shirt. Or you can leave." Staats stated.

"Nope."

DJ was getting angry. "Listen, either find a purple shirt in about five seconds, or just get out of here. If you aren't here to support Kyle, which you obviously aren't, then just leave."

"And why should I listen to what you have to say?"

"Ah, because it's coach's orders, and I'm twice as fast and twice as strong as you?"

"Yo..." Dylan started, before he was cut off by a much larger voice.

"Moreno! What are you wearing?" Barrett yelled, stepping out of his large black Silverado.

"I w..."

"No excuses! Find something else! Now!"

Moreno gave a small grunt, before pulling some Grizzly out of his pocket. "Yes sir."

The dream blurred once again. DJ was staring at the body of Veronica Clark. She looked... peaceful. Too soon... He walked by the body, straight to Kyle, giving him a strong hug. "Our offer still stands." I wish he would accept it! I feel so useless!

He gave a warm smile, tears in his eyes at the sight of his deceased mother. "Thanks, man."

The dream blurred. DJ was sitting at a desk in a dark classroom. A projector replaying the same play over... and over... and over again. He held a bag of sunflower seeds in his left hand, and an empty Big-Gulp in his right. Barrett walked up to the from. "Western Heights looks the exact same as last year. Slow and clumsy." Barrett looked at his linebackers, DJ, Tyler, Kendrick, Corben, Nick, Josh, Boomer, and Forbes. "We should be able to rotate you all on a regular basis." DJ slipped a small Tylenol into his mouth, his back was killing him, but he wouldn't tell anyone.

"So do they still run the same five plays?" Tyler asked. The room filled with a little laughter.

"No! They have a sixth this year! They run to the closed side of the field!" The laughter continued.

DJ just stayed silent in the desk. Pain.... so much pain! The dream blurred, putting DJ in the middle of a horrible field. The grass was halfway up his cleats, the yard lines were jagged, as well as the out of bounds. Razor wire around the stadium, made completely out of a boring grey concrete. It's like we're playing in prison.

DJ strapped up his helmet, jogging out to the field. I already have six sacks and an interception, this is too easy! He cringed as he planted his right foot to slow his momentum. Come on, baby! Just one more quarter, then I'll get you looked at! DJ looked at the formation. "Flood! Flood!" He yelled. He looked over to the coaches. They pointed at the night sky, holding up six fingers. "Black six! Black six!" DJ screamed. "Motion! Motion!" Nick yelled. DJ looked over at the receiver. I hit the A gap, poor bastard won't even see me coming!

"Eyes!" The QB yelled.

"Eyes!" The line yelled in return.

"Seeet. Hut-ut! Hut!" The line went in motion, the QB dropping back.

DJ ran straight for his gap. Already a yard from the hole. The center saw him closing in. "Oh hell no!" He yelled, adjusting his stance to stop the backer. DJ lowered his body to the ground, knees almost hitting the grass, in an explosion, he legs launched him into the center's chest, knocking him back on his heels. Soloman better give me a donut for this! DJ kept churning his feet, until the three hundred pound center was flat on his back. DJ rolled off, and in three steps, had his arms around the QB's waist, throwing him to the ground.

DJ got up, walking back towards his place on the field. Just racking up the stats. He heard feet pounding the ground behind him, he thought nothing of it, just players jogging back into their positions. As DJ walked, the steps got louder and louder. Then, DJ felt the center slamming into his back. DJ screamed in pain as he collapsed to the ground.

"Payback, bitch!" The center yelled at DJ, who lay on the ground.

DJ tried to curl into a ball, only for the pain to shoot through his body, he tried to lay straight with the same result. He settled for laying in the same position. No! Not now! He felt the tears streaming down his face. The pain was excruciating.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

Celestia looked at the creature. She remembered his story, and now knew his name. DJ. The creature started to groan in pain in the bed, sweat starting to build around his forehead and arms and legs. His hair started to stand up. Celestia looked at the doctor. "What's happening?"

The doctor looked over at DJ. "From the looks of it, he's having a nightmare. He hasn't woke from after this morning, and has been having this reaction on and off."

Celestia looked back at the creature. If you aren't a warrior, but only an athlete, why are your nightmares this bad? "Is there any way we can wake him up?"

"Only with magic, or from the inside. Forcing him to wake up would be our best bet. But..."

"Lu-Lu is the only one who can, and she doesn't want to go back..."

"Exactly."

So, we could either test magic on him, and not know how he will react. Or convince Luna to go back into his head. Celestia looked back at DJ. His breath had quickened, and was sweating like no other. Maybe I can convince Luna. I really don't want to test on him. She stared at DJ longer. The more she stared, the more she saw, not a alien killer, but instead, a lost foal.

Celestia stared for near ten minutes. Analyzing each scar, each facial feature, each muscle, each breath. She felt sympathy for him. From his story, he had just reached the top of the world, and it was violently ripped away. The truck rolling, the deer jumping, and the random portal that was formed by an alicorn that just wanted her older sister to be proud.

Pride. A deadly thing. A feeling that can drop a full grown stallion from a mountain of wealth, to an alleyway with a tin can asking for spare change. Celestia let out an audible sigh. "I will return, please watch him."

"Yes, Princess!"

________________________________________________________________________________________

Twilight stared at the lines from her machine. This is impossible! She looked again and again at the jagged lines. The machine was built to detect massive outputs of magic, and last night, had a giant spike. She ran the tests again and again, the residues was still there, but was rapidly fading. I don't understand? Something this powerful had to have got the Princess' attention! Twilight walked up the stairs from the basement holding all her new machines and gizmos.

"Spike!" Twilight yelled. She heard the small pitter patter of her assistant's feet from upstairs.

"Coming!" He yelled back. When he got to the stairs, the poor dragon's foot landed on a small piece of paper, causing him to roll down the stairs. Twilight flinched with each thud. Spike eventually landed in the first floor, face first.

"Spike, take a letter."

Spike grabbed a quil and piece of paper. "Alright!"

"Dear Princess Celestia, last night, one of the machines sent to me to detect large amounts of magic had a large spike, located in Canterlot. I can not tell if it is a source of disharmonic or harmonic magic. However, it did seem very strong. I am curious as to what it was. If you have yet to see any signs of a large magic anomaly, it may still be there, as the machine is still reading the after affects, though they are rapidly fading. Your student, Twilight Sparkle." Twilight looked over at Spike. "You get all that?"

"....ilight… Sparkle. Got it!" Spike said, before catching the letter on fire, turning it into a green smoke, flying out an open window towards Canterlot. "So, what do you think it was?"

"I don't k..." Twilight started, before Pinkie popped out of one of the bookshelves.

"It's a human! Lyra was right about them!" She said with a large smile on her face. "I wonder if I can throw it a 'Welcome to Equestria' party?"

"A human, Pinkie? Those are just myths. What makes you think a human is in Equestria?"

"Well, last night I woke up with a craving for strawberry cupcakes, twitchy tail, and itchy arms! And I knew it meant a human was in Equestria!"

"This would be the first human in Equestria! How wou..." Twilight stopped herself. It's Pinkie, don't question it. "If a human is here, then why hasn't Princess Celestia told me about it?"

"Maybe she's been busy? I mean, hello! A human! You know of it was here that you would be asking it all kinds of questions."

"If it understood our language, yeah. But Pinkie, if it really is a human, do you remember any of the myths?"

"This isn't like those in the stories!"

"How do you know?"

Pinkie narrowed her eyes, slowly receding back into the shelves. "I just do." Her eyes darted back and forth, landing on Spike. "Oh, hey Spike!"

"Hey, Pinkie!"

Pinkie continued to sink into the shelf until she was no longer in the library, but serving customers at Sugarcube Corner. Twilight let out a small sigh as she levitated the books that were on the floor from Pinkie's entrance back into their proper places. "It couldn't be a human, could it?" Twilight asked Spike.

"How should I know? I don't even know what a human is."

Twilight let out a sigh of relief. "Good. They aren't exactly nice. They are usually very violent, bring destruction and war with them everywhere they go."

"Then surely Princess Celestia would've seen it?"

"Maybe." Twilight started towards the door, the sun was starting to set, and she was going over to Rarity's for a sleepover. "Spike, if Princess Celestia writes back, bring it to me unless it's too late, alright?"

"Of course!"

Twilight smiled. "Alright! See you tomorrow!"

_______________________________________________________________________________

"No, Tia! I'm not going back in there!" Luna said as she continued to read the "To Kill a Mockingbird." "Tia, what's a nigger?"

"Luna, he's in pain. As to your second question, I don't know. Why?"

Luna looked back at the book. "They are spoken pretty badly of. As if they did something horrible, yet, I can't find what."

"I can't answer your question, Luna. And I know what I said, that you wouldn't have to go back, but if you saw him, you would understand."

"If you would have been there you would understand! It was horrible!"

"He's scared, and alone, Luna. He's in a place he doesn't know, with things he doesn't understand. He's having nightmares Luna, and we can't wake him up. But you can. You can end his suffering."

Luna looked up from the book. "What if it happens again? What if he has the metal that spits fire?"

"Luna, I really don't think he knows it's a dream, or he would stop it himself."

"But what if he does?"

Celestia let out a sigh. "Luna, we could fight on this all night. But we can't. You have to raise the moon soon, and I need to sleep. I will let you choose whether or not to help him. You don't have to, but I think it would help him." Celestia started walking out of the room. "You may want to take a look at him, help make up your mind." Celestia shut the door behind her, leaving Luna alone with the alien book.

Luna let out a sigh. Maybe I should at least look at him. I did bring him here. I guess it's my fault he's laying in that hospital bed... There was a soft knock at the door. "Enter." She said. A yellow unicorn walked in the room with two more books.

"Princess! We found these in a compartment of the truck!" He lowered the two books onto Luna's desk. One was a brown book, with very few pages, and a pencil stuck in the side, the other was a slightly larger and thicker black book, with the title 'Holy Bible' engraved in a gold color.

"Thank you." Luna said, picking up the brown book first. "You haven't found any weapons, have you?"

"Actually, we think we found two."

Luna looked at the unicorn. "Think?"

"Well, one is obvious, a black knife. But the other, we aren't to sure about. We think it is some kind of weapon, but we aren't too sure, and we don't want to mess with it too much, if it is a weapon, we don't want it against us."

"Could you possibly describe it?" Luna opened the book. It contained a calendar with notes on almost every date.

"Yes. It is half wood, half metal. The metal is a long hollow tube, and the wood looks like it would be what is grasped on to. We found something that may go with it in the truck. I'll be right back!" The unicorn ran off, leaving Luna with tbe brown book in her magical grasp.

Luna looked back at the book with notes all over. "This is just a schedule? When and where he needs to be." She closed it, picking up the larger black book. "In the begining..."

The unicorn trotted through the door. "Princess, these are what we found." He levitated three red cylinders with a silver bottom over to Luna. "We are unsure how they work, but it is easy to see what is inside."

Luna watched the unicorn split the red cylinder in half. A black powder and small metal balls started to fall to the floor. She looked at one of hers. There was a large outline of the letter X. "And you said you have yet to know what it does?"

"Correct. We think that these actually go into the metal and wood device, this is supported by when we were examining it, we pulled hard on one part on the bottom, ejecting one of these onto the floor." The unicorn laughed. "I must say, he's better off with the knife if that's all it does."

"Do you have any information on this black powder?"

"Yes, it is very flammable, almost explosive."

Luna eyed the cylinder, slowly moving it farther away from her body. If he is awake, he could tell us what these are, and what they do? As well as most of his other things. "Thank you for this information. I would ask to be alone now."

"Yes Princess!" He processed to bow and walk out of the room.

Luna looked back to the black book, which had pages very different than all of the other books. Tia wants me to go back into his dreams, to wake him up. If I do that, he could explain all his things. Give them knowledge. And end his suffering. Luna sighed. "Maybe I should at least take a look at him. I have around thirty minutes until I need to raise the moon." Luna stood up, making her way to the hospital, where DJ was having another round of nightmares.

Luna looked at the shaking body, eyes darting back and forth under his lids, sweat dripping off his body. He looks horrible! "Doctor, how long has he been like this?"

"On and off for hours." He replied while continuing to stare at a chart.

Luna let out a sigh. Tia's right, I should end his suffering. Luna's horn let off a small glow, her conscious mind entering DJ's.

"I'm sorry, bub. But you have to." A strong voice said. Luna blinked a couple times. She was in a house, she knew that for sure. She looked over to see a large alien, much like DJ, on one knee, talking to a much smaller one. By the way the dream was bending, Luna assumed the smaller one was the alien in the hospital bed.

"Dad! I don't want to go with her!" He screamed, a tear in his left eye.

The larger alien embraced DJ. "I don't want you to go either, but you have to."

DJ cried a little more. "I don't want her, Dad! I like Mom better!" There was a strange noise similar to one of Pinkie's horns. DJ looked over his shoulder. "And she brought Bruce..."

I don't understand? Why is he having to go with her if his mother is here? Is this like school for a foal? If so, why is it just one person? "Buddy, I know you don't want to go. But if you don't, me and Mama could get in a lot of trouble, and you would have to stay there."

DJ nodded. "Okay." He turned, heading for the door. Luna followed as a ghost of herself. How is this a nightmare?

DJ stepped into a machine similar to the one that landed in Luna's room, only more like a box, and green. "Hey, man!" Another strong voice said as DJ opened the door, met with a cloud of smoke.

"Hey Bruce..." DJ said as he took a seat. Luna stayed as a ghost, watching the scene unfold. No doubt this is a memory.

A female voice came from the front. "What? Not gonna say hi to your mama?" Wait, I thought his mother was in the house?

"You're not my mama! Emiley's my mama!" He screamed. A hand made solid contact with his face.

"No! I'M your mama!" She said, pulling a lever, sending the machine into high speeds very fast, causing a loud roar.

DJ pulled at the door, trying to get out of the machine. "I hate you! I hate you!" Is all he screamed as he started banging on the glass, but his little weak arms had no affect. Luna had seen enough. She wrapped a wing around his trembling body, and with a bright flash, both were brought back into the world known as reality.

______________________________________________________________________________

DJ immediately pulled the blankets over his head. What the fuck was that?! I ain't thought about that bitch in years! He let out a loud groan, his head was killing him, along with his ribs, his sore limbs, and his empty stomach. He lowered the blanket, but kept his eyes sealed shut. He could feel the fluids going into his arm. So I really am in a hospital. Looks like my subconscious got that part right. DJ was searching his mind for anything he could remember after the crash, but only came up with fragments from dreams.

DJ slowly opened his eyes, looking straight up at the white ceiling. He let out a small sigh. Still not Norman Regional, maybe it's Access? Or a Saint's? Maybe OSOI, no, they're sports related. I doubt they would see me for a car accident. DJ's stomach let out a loud grumble. "Empty, 'eh? Don't worry, bud..." DJ slapped his hand on his gut. "...I'll fill you up."

"You're hungry?" A soothing voice said. DJ had heard it before, but couldn't put his finger on it. He continued to stare at the ceiling.

"Yeah. Pretty sure the last time I ate was a couple pieces of pizza on the bus on the way home."

"Would you like me to get you something?" The voice said again.

"That would be much appreciated, thank you." As he finished the last word, DJ rolled his head to the right, vomiting a green burning liquid. Fuck that hurt...

"I'll be right back!" The voice said, DJ frowned when he heard two sets of feet. Two ladies, one talking, both in heels. Maybe one was just observing? Oh well, at least I get food.

DJ rolled his head over, spitting out the rest of the vomit from his mouth. He looked up, noticing the scenery. Well played, room looks the exact same. Maybe I regained consciousness earlier? His head rolled the other way, his clothes were laying on the ground in a pile, as well as the wrap. DJ frowned when he saw his underwear. He raised the blanket, revealing him completely naked. He looked back at the pile, just out of arm's reach. This is different, never been naked in a hospital. He swung his legs out of the bed, using his toes to drag the pile closer to the bed, where he quickly put on the underwear and shorts. He reached in the left pocket, finding his black Skullcandy headphones.

Awesome, now where's my... there it is! DJ found his phone on the floor, screen down. He picked it up, clicking the home button. Full battery? Strange... He plugged is his headphones, pressing the play button built into the wire. The speakers came to life.

Yeah I get it, you're an outcast

Always under attack

Always comin' in last

Bringin' up the past

No one owes you anything!

I think, you need a shotgun blast

A kick in the ass

So paranoid

Watch your back!

Oh my, here we go

Another loose cannon gone bipolar

Slipped down, couldn't get much lower

Quicksand's got no sense of humor

I'm still laughin' like heeeeeeeell

You think that by cryin' to me

Lookin' so sorry that I'm gonna believe

You've been infected by social disease

Well then take your medicine!

I created the sound of madness!

Wrote the book on pain!

DJ cut off the music when he saw the door start to open. Wouldn't want to be rude. He pulled the headphones out of his ears. The door was open, but nothing was coming through. "Umm... Hello?" He called.

"Just a second..." The same voice said. DJ strained his ears, there were whispers, but he couldn't understand what was being said.

DJ's stomach growled again, louder this time. "Could you hurry please?"

The whispers stopped. The door opened even wider. DJ heard the feet coming through the door. About damn time! He was used to eating around seven times a day, every hour and a half to two hours, pushing near four-thousand calories. He was always growing, and if he didn't have his food, he wasn't growing. When he wasn't growing, he wasn't getting stronger. When he wasn't getting stronger, someone, somewhere, was. And DJ hated losing.

DJ watched as the tray came in first, held by a dark blue aura of light. His plastic shaker and protein bag along with several fruits and vegetables, and his creatine bottle. DJ stared at the tray, jaw hitting the floor. What the hell? Two blue hooves eventually came through the door, followed by the head of a horse with cyan eyes, mane flowing with stars glittering in it. She stepped the rest of the way into the room.

DJ stared at the alicorn. He eventually looked away, down to his hands. "Ten perfect fingers..." he tried pushing his fingers through his hand. "Solid hands..." He plugged his nose. "And can't breathe through a plugged nose.... This is real... This isn't a dream."

"We found this bag and bottle in your truck.... We thought you would want it..." The alicorn placed the tray on DJ's lap.

DJ looked down at his two supplements. He popped the top off the shaker and creatin, pouring the white powder into the shaker, then cracked open the bag, pouring in two scoops. "Water..."

"W-what?"

"I need water." He said, picking up the shaker. "You drink it, not eat it."

"Oh... of course..." She said, backing out of the room. "I'll be right back."

"Yeah, alright." He said. As soon as the pony walked out of the room, DJ looked around the room. "Hardy har har, guys! Real funny!" DJ looked at the apples and carrots on the tray. He picked up a carrot, observing it close, looking for anything suggesting someone messed with it. He took a small nibble, satisfied by the taste, he took a larger bite.

The door opened again. The alicorn carrying a large glass of water. "Will this do?"

"Yeah, that's fine." He said, grabbing the glass, pouring it into the shaker. After twenty seconds of shaking, he popped the white lid, tipping back the bottle. Sweet Jesus, this tastes like shit... He continued to down the liquid like it was nothing. When you want something, most of the time you have to sacrifice something. To gain muscle and size, DJ sacrificed taste. Same meals everyday. No variety. But it was pretty damn cheap.

As he started on the apple, the alicorn decided to speak. "I believe we have met before, on much more... violent circumstances."

DJ looked up. "Really? I don't recall..."

The alicorn waved her hoof at him. "Maybe we can talk about his later. I apologize for not introducing myself. I am Pri..."

"Princess Luna, raised the moon every night, sentenced to the moon for a thousand years, yada yada." DJ looked around the room. "How are you guys doing this? I know you don't have near enough money to buy a setup like this."

Luna looked at DJ. "How do you..."

DJ put up his hand. "Listen, you're doing a great job with this, but seriously, you can cut the act. I know this is just a prank." He looked around the room again. "Worst time possible, assholes!"

"Act?"

DJ started laughing. "Yeah, come on, who are you really? Mariah? Meridian? Cheyenne?" DJ looked at the tray. "How'd you get the aura of light, that was actually pretty BA."

Luna just stared at DJ as he ranted on about how it was just a prank from his friends, he rolled his truck and they decided they would get him back for the flat tires and condoms on the door handles. Luna turned to see her older sister in the doorway. "He thinks it's a prank."

"Should we tell him?"

Luna looked back to DJ. "Let's let him finish his rant, then we'll tell him."

Celestia nodded. "I believe we should keep him here, in the hospital until we learn more about him. We don't want the public to be in fear."

"The nobles already know something is wrong, and their gossip spreads fast."

"When we learn that he is not dangerous, we will reveal him to the public."

"How can we be sure he's not dangerous?" Luna asked. Before Celestia could speak, an explosion rang out from the floor below, multiple small holes popping up in the floor.

"Hey! Who the fuck has my shotgun?" DJ said, leaning over the bed looking at the small holes.

Celestia sighed. "I am unsure."

_________________________________________________________________

Edited by Sanity

Maybe I need a chapter namer guy?

"Tyler! If that was you, I swear to God, I'll break your fucking neck!" DJ yelled through the holes in the floor.

"Please, calm down." Celestia said as she started moving towards DJ. She had earlier received a letter from Twilight, knowing something big had happened. And DJ was the big thing that happened.

"Are you serious? Calm down? That jackass has my baby, and about hit me with it, and you two are pulling the biggest prank ever! Even bigger than when we stole that stuffed bear! And you expect me to calm down?"

Celestis looked at the holes in the floor. "I am afraid to tell you that the cause of your 'baby' going off was a curious scientist, not your friend."

DJ looked up at Celestia. "Seriously, cut the crap. It's over. I know everything."

Luna walked by Celestia, but looked at DJ. "I hate to tell you, but this isn't a prank. This is very real."

DJ's face started to slowly fall from the bright smile, to a look that could rival Fluttershy's Stare. "What?"

"You are not in Oklahoma. You are in Canterlot, Equestria. You are currently in a hospital recovering from a horrible accident."

His eyes stayed locked on Luna's. She felt like the icey blue eyes were peering into her soul as they dilated, and started to turn to a more grey color. "Bullshit. That's impossible."

Luna took a deep breath. "We found a set of armor with your 'truck.' Would you be willing to explain what you do?"

DJ looked at the ground, his face was turning a ghostly white. "This isn't happening... I was set! Everything was ready! I just had to sign the papers! Finish this year!"

"We understand you must be upset. Bu..." Celestia started, only to get cut off.

"Understand? Are you kidding me? You think you understand?! You don't understand. You have never been in my shoes. I was at the top! I was it! I was the pride of Noble! I had a full ride to college, where I could fulfill my dreams!" DJ stared at Celestia. "And now I'm in a hospital bed with talking fucking horses!"

"Well..." Luna started.

"Why am I here anyway! I should be dead! That would have saved me the humiliation!" DJ's face quickly turned from rage, to pain. "Mom.... Dad.... I wonder what they're doing..."

"DJ, we know that you are going through a lot right now. But could you answer our question?"

DJ's rage was back. "Answer mine first! How the fuck did I get here?"

Celestia looked over to Luna. Luna lowered her head. "I... I was trying to make Tia proud. I wanted to save something from disharmony, like her. But better..."

DJ started a sarcastic clap. "Well done, I bet she's real impressed." DJ looked at Celestia. "Where's my truck?"

She gave a frown. "Now you will answer our question. We found a set of armor. What did you do where you're from?"

DJ looked around, before letting out a sigh. "I apologize. I'm just..."

"We know." Luna said, hiding her silent sobs. "Now, our question."

DJ let out a long breath of air. "Where to begin? The 'armor' you found, is just padding. Just to keep me from breaking something, and allowing me to hit harder. I made a few... adjustments, such as the butterfly collar on the back, which helps absorb blows. My helmet was a brand new Revo DNA, I got to take it out of the plastic my freshman year. Every mark is my doing."

"And the shoes and gloves?" Celestia threw in.

"Cleats are for traction, gloves just offer a layer of protection between my skin and the other bastard's pads. Keeps me from bleeding, see here..." DJ raised his right hand, revealing a scar that went from his pinky finger to his middle finger. "Got that the first day of practice my Junior year, forgot my gloves in my locker, and didn't have time to grab them. So I practiced without them. Well, I went to shuck a linemen, and an old screw from his pads tore the skin right off."

"That's what the armor does, what do you do?" Luna asked

DJ rubbed his hands together. "I think I deserve to see my truck now. I have cooperated... for the most part."

"Your truck is being taken apart, being searched for any more weapons."

DJ's eyes got wide. "Don't you fucking dare take Lil' Red apart." DJ looked at the holes in the ground. "Shouldn't we be more concerned with the fact that a SHOTGUN JUST BLEW A HOLE IN THE FLOOR?"

Luna looked at the holes. "Yes, I suppose that could be a problem..."

DJ laughed. "Could be? In the wrong hands, that is a very dangerous tool!"

Celestia looked at DJ with concern. "If it is dangerous, would you mind explaining why it was in your truck?"

"See these?" DJ pointed to his canines. "These are for more than just show. I eat meat. I like to know where my food comes from, so." He made the the motion of pumping the shotgun, and yelled. "Bang! I hunt for the good stuff. It always tastes better when you kill or find it."

"You will not hunt us! We are no..." Luna started before DJ hushed her.

"Shhhh.... horse is taboo in my culture." He said with a smile amd wink.

"Oh... well, ummm..." Luna was lost with her words.

Celestia decided to speak up. "Back to the question, that you keep skipping around. What did you do?"

He put his hands behind his head. "I'm a Maniac. A head hunter. I read what people do based on how they move, and I make them pay for it."

"Are you a warrior, of some kind?"

DJ laughed. "A Willie? Hell no! Outside backer isn't my position. I was an Evil once, if that counts?" DJ thought back to his freshman year as the strong side defensive end.

Celestia was confused. "I don't understand what you're saying... Are you evil?"

"Oh, shit, look at the time! I answered your question!" DJ clapped his hands together, emitting a loud pop. "Now, where's my truck?"

"This sucks dick!" DJ yelled through the door to the cell. He held the bag of fluids over his head still, and had a small corner of the room for vomit. He heard hoofsteps coming down the stairs. "Hey! Peckerhead!" The guard started to walk by DJ's cell. "Psssssst! Hey! 'Mere ya little bitch!" The guard continued to walk, ignoring his statement. "You have a small penis!" DJ yelled as he rounded the corner. He leaned against one of the walls, pulling the phone and headphones out of his pocket. At least they let me keep these, I'm still worried about the gun though...

______________________________________________________________

Twilight sat on the floor in her friend's home. While the other five ponies were having a great time, enjoying themselves with games, gossip, and laughter, Twilight was unable to get the strange reading out of her head. It's impossible for something that big just just pop up! She felt a hoof on her shoulder.

"Ya alright, sugarcube?" Applejack asked.

Twilight looked up at her orange friend. "Wha? Oh, yes. I'm fine, just..."

Pinkie hopped over to Twilight and Applejack. "Twilight saw a giant magical spike on one of her do-hikeys, and a human came to Equestria!"

Twilight shook her head. "Pinkie, I can assure you, it wasn't a human. They don't possess magic like us."

"A human? You mean them old myth fellers that were twice as tall as us ponies? Had long things on their hooves, and stood on two legs?" Twilight nodded. "Well, I don't see how one of them could get here..."

Pinkie was hanging from the ceiling. "Simple! Princess Luna was bored, and wanted to impress Princess Celestia! So she decided to do like her and sense disharmony and save it, but she wanted to go bigger! So she opened a portal to another world and poof!" Pinkie fell to the ground in a leaf like motion. "Human in Equestria!"

The other five ponies just stared at Pinkie. Rainbow Dash finally spoke. "I bet I could take it, doesn't sound too tough!"

Twilight looked up at the pegasus. "You realize one of the myths contains an object that could cover Equestria in ash and flames? And even those that survive the initial blast, still get hit with the residue?"

"W-w-why would somepony do that?" Fluttershy asked.

Twilight looked over at her yellow friend. "Well, it's hard to say. Some myths say war, others say a religious debate. It all depends on which one you read."

"They sound so barbaric!" Rarity said.

Before Twilight could answer, there was a knock on the door. Rarity walked over, opening the door to a panting spike. "Princ..." *gasp for air* "Celest..." *gasp for air* "Lette..." *gasp for air*

Twilight grabbed the letter from Spike, a photo attatched to the bottom. She read the letter out loud. "Dear, Twilight. Your machine was correct in picking up the magical anomaly. Last night, Luna decided to try and open a portal to a new world to impress me..."

"Told you!" Pinkie said.

Twilight kept reading. "She succeeded. However, instead of bringing a creature into the world by dragging it through the portal, it instead rolled through in a machine that its calls a 'truck.'" Twilight lowered the letter. "Wait, it speaks Equestrian?" After numerous shrugs, she continued to read. "The creature that calls itself 'DJ' had been slipping in and out of consciousness. Luna tried once to enter his dreams, but was unaware of his knowledge on sleep. He was able to conjure two pieces of metal, similar to the 'shotgun' we found in his machine, which spit fire at her. The second time, she was able to wake him.

"We have found multiple books and pieces of information to help find out what he is. The picture attached is a full body photooof the creature. If you happen to know what it is, I ask you write me back immediately. He is currently being held in the dungeons for admitting to being a 'maniac' and 'evil.' Your teacher, Princess Celestia."

Twilight looked at the picture, eyes wide at the sight. Pinkie was right! The creature was covered in scars, had things on his hooves, and was a biped, jusg by looking at the muscle structure.

Pinkie looked at the picture. "I told you!" She said. "Nopony ever listens to me!"

Applejack observed the picture. "Aweful lot of scars it's got."

Rarity looked at the picture too. "He, my dear Applejack. This creature is obviously a male."

Rainbowdash just stared, she wouldn't admit it, but she was a little scared of the creature in the picture. "He's not that big..."

Twilight continued to stare at the photo. "So, if humans are real, and one is in Equestria..." Twilight turned to her friends. "Did it bring any of its friends?"

Fluttershy sneaked a peak at the picture. "Poor thing, look at all his bruises! He must be in a lot of pain."

_________________________________________________________________

Luna was walking through the dungeon corridors. He said that he was evil. Was, as in past. He also said that he is a maniac. Present. She was getting closer to his cell, she wanted to talk to him about the evil. While she didn't understand him being in an unknown land, and saw how upset he got, she did understand having a dark past. Chills went down her spine at the thought.

The closer she got, the louder a strange pounding noise made itself known. At first, it was random, but she eventually found the beat. It sounded similar to a beat for a military drum. The halls were eventually filled with a voice.

"I was supposed to be the soldier

Who never blows his composure

Even though I hold the weight of the whole world on my shoulders"

Luna continued down the hall to the cell holding DJ, the voice getting louder and louder.

"I ain't never supposed to show it

My crew ain't supposed to know it

Even if I go toe to toe with the Benzino, it don't matter."

Lun was looking through the small window in the door to DJ's cell, he was pacing back and forth, pounding on his chest.

"I'd never drag him to battles I can't handle

Unless I absolutely have to

I'm supposed to set an example.

I need to be a leader

My crew looks to me to guide 'em

And if some shit ever pop off

I'm supposed to be beside them."

Luna cleared her throat. "DJ?" He ignored her.

"That Ja shit I tried to squash it

It was too late to stop it

There's a certain line you don't cross and he crossed it."

"DJ!" Luna said a little louder.

I heard him say Hailie's name on tbe song and I just lost it

It was crazy this Jay-Z and Nas shit

And even though the battle was won I feel like we lost it

I spent too much energy on it

Honestly I'm exhausted."

"DJ!" Luna yelled, using her Royal Canterlot voice, knocking him to the side a little.

"Whoa, bitch! Chill!" DJ said as he looked over to Luna, grabbing the buds from his ears. "So, I am guessing you are either sending me back, or going to torture me. I like the first option better."

Luna let out a sigh. "No, I wish to speak with you. I feel we have something we can both understand."

DJ laughed. "A pony princess has something in common with me." DJ started wrapping up his headphones, putting them in his pocket. "That's funny."

Luna's eyes narrowed. "Wait, earlier you said my name...."

"Yeah, so?"

"I never said my name... never introduced myself..."

DJ let out a long breath of air, and his face had a look that said 'fuck.' "You want me to lie and make ya feel better, or tell the truth?"

Luna was taken back. "The truth, obviously."

"Then you can't to anything drastic, nor get pissed when I tell you the answer. Understand?" Luna nodded. "Okay... umm... in my world, ah... you are mythological creatures."

"Well, that's not too bad."

DJ held up his hand. "Let me finish. You, and your sister are highlights for this... place. Known well to a lot, unknown to even more." DJ held his hands to his chest. "I am one of those people that study the myths. However, unlike those that use it to fuel joy, I use it to fuel hate."

"So, you studied something you hate? Why?"

DJ walked over to the window, placing his fingers around the edges. "If you are about to go into a war, are you just going to run in blind, guns blazing?"

"We are a peaceful nation..."

"Not the point. Look at this from my eyes."

"Okay..."

"No. You aren't going to go in blind. You are going to study the area you are about to go in, learn the enemy's tactics, their views. Use their culture and beliefs against them."

"Why, why would you hate one for what they enjoy?"

DJ shrugged. "I get bored. Now, what was it you wanted to talk about... oh yes! You said you had something in common with me." DJ turned around, pacing the room. "Care to share?" He laughed. "Poet and didn't know it. Make a rhyme anytime." He laughed even more.

"You said you were once evil.. "

DJ looked at the door. "I said I was an Evil. Not evil." Luna stared at DJ with a blank look. "I was a strong side defensive end, not a Hitler."

"Hitler?"

"Mass genocide, millions of people killed. One of the largest ever, only rivaled by the ninety percent genocide of the native americans." DJ had a little smile. "Knowledge is power, ignorance is bliss." Luna was about to talk, when he cut her off again. "When can I either see my truck, grab my gun, or go home?"

Luna's eyes were wide. "W-what?"

DJ started laughing. "I'm going insane!" He slammed his fist into a wall.

"What's a defensive end?" Luna asked, still a little taken back.

DJ walked back over to the door. "Ever heard of football?"

*****12:32 AM Sunday morning*****

Luna and DJ were sitting in the cold cell, Xs and Os carved into the floor. "And finally, we have the linemen." He pointed to the five Xs and four Os. "They are the beating heart of the game. Without them, the backs could run over us all day long, and on the flipside, no line means no protection. The backs would get nailed every play. The trenches are horrible. Lots of violence, blood, and not the nicest words being said."

"Is one more important than the others?"

"No no no no no no no, they are all of equal importance. The center is the one that gets the ball to the back. The guards help the center keep the A and B gaps shut. The tackles make sure no ends or rushing outside backers get around to collapse the pocket."

"And what about defensive linemen?"

"The ends are designed to keep anything from running outside the C and D gaps, while the tackles shoot through the A and B, to get to the backfield."

Luna stared at the symbols on the floor. "I don't understand how twenty-two ponies can all be equally important?"

"Okay, let's take a look at it. You know what all the positions do now, correct?"

"Correct."

"Okay, let's take a look at a busted offensive play..." DJ started drawing lines in the ground, when a guard in black armor walked towards the door.

"Your highness, you are late for the night court."

Luna let out a sigh. "I should attend that, shouldn't I? Explain what exactly is going on." She stood up. "Thank you for explaining your game, I feel we know much more about you."

"I still have to stay in the cell, don't I?"

Luna jumbled her words together. "Well... umm... you could, ahhh..."

DJ stood to his feet. "Listen, I just want to see my truck. I would be perfectly happy to go there, instead of this shit."

"Do not speak to Princess Luna that way, you beast!"

DJ looked at the guard. "Hey, did you see that? Oh! There it goes again!"

The guard looked around with his eyes. "What is it?"

"The fuck I don't give!" DJ looked back to Luna. "So, can I see my truck? I won't touch the shotgun, I promise. Unless some idiot points it at me."

"I suppose it would be fine, maybe you could help them with their research?"

"Sure, I was going to try and salvage as much as possible, but research is cool too."

The guard opened the door, allowing Luna and DJ to step out. "I am going to guess you have no idea where your truck is?"

"That would be correct." DJ looked at the guard giving him a dirty look. "Aww, what's wrong? Is the big bad monster getting what he wants?"

"I would ask you don't provoke my guards, they get enough from the citizens."

DJ laughed a little. "My bad, I just love a good laugh every now and again."

Luna smiled a little. He and Pinkie would get along great. "Why is your truck so important to you?"

"Lots of memories in 'er."

She gave him a weird look. "It has a gender?"

"No. Well, not technically. Pretty much everything a guy owns that has power is considered his 'baby,' like my shotgun, or is just a female, like Lil' Red."

"So it would be like a guard calling his horn horny..." Luna immediately regretted what she said as DJ burst into laughter.

"Oh, that was funny!" He said, wiping the tears from his eyes. "I don't think this could get any better." His eyes landed on the guard, which DJ just noticed, had a horn on his head. His face formed an evil smile.

"No! Don't say anything!" Luna said, using her magic to grab DJ's arm.

"Oh, come on! You really expect me to let a joke like that pass?"

"Yes."

DJ tried to shake off the magic on his arm. "Damn, you're worse than my mother when it comes to stuff like this." His face fell as he mentioned his mom. "Wow. I always knew college would be tough." DJ stopped where he was. "I want to go home."

"What?"

DJ took in a breath. "Send me home. Now. I don't even want the truck or gun, hell, send me naked! I don't care! But send me home."

"I have the night court to attend..."

"Skip it." DJ had a tear forming in his eye. "Just please. Send me home. I want to go home. You of everyone would understand."

Luna was about to speak, try to object to what he said, but nothing came out. She had once missed home. She missed it bad.Only, she was banished. She had threatened eternal night. DJ had done nothing. He was just the victim of a horrible accident. One that should have killed him, had it not been for the portal. Luna looked at DJ as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"How old are you?" Luna asked. There was no way an adult warrior would have tears rolling down his face.

"What does that have to do with going home?" He asked, stepping towards Luna. "I want to be in my house, with my weiner dog Roxy, my cyberpower PC, calling my friends faggots while we beat the shit out of Vanu and TR, with the annoying cat that I am going to kill someday!" He was face to face with Luna. "I just want my parents. My mom and my dad."

Luna stared into his eyes. "Just... maybe it'll help..."

"Seventeen years of age." He said.

"You are only seventeen, yet, you have a weapon that puts holes in our floors, and a knife?"

DJ sighed. "You don't understand." He his face. "Please. Send me home."

__________________________________________________________________________________________

DJ stared with arms crossed at the scratched red metal that was once his beautiful truck. I just want this nightmare to be over with. I'm in a coma right now. This is just a different kind of dream, and that's why everything is so real. Why I can't do anything. DJ uncrossed his arms as he made his way towards the truck. All the scientists just stared at the alien.

DJ tried to open the passenger side door, the handle released, but the door stayed shut. "I'm sorry, Red." DJ placed his foot on the truck, yanking the door open.

When he looked around the cabin, the first thing he noticed was all the compartments wide open and empty. All his cash, insurance, wallet, books, glasses, everything, was gone. So much for privacy. He looked over at his stereo. Hello, looks like someone turned you and left you on. DJ rotated the knob, the speakers coming to life.

...in to say

But nothin' comes out when you move your lips

Just a bunch of gibberish

You mother fuckers act like you forgot about Dre.

So what do you say to s...

DJ pressed the eject button, grabbing the 'bass' CD from the slot. Gasps filled the room, and the scratching of pencil to paper was heard. DJ crawled out of the truck. "Alright, I know you found a whole case of these, where is it?"

A grey unicorn stepped forward. "It's with the other things, other side of the machine."

"Gracias."

"What?"

"Gracias. You know, what? Nevermind." DJ walked to the other side of the truck.

A blue pegasus walked towards DJ. "Would you mind if I asked you a couple questions?"

"Course not." He said as he picked up his pads, tieing his cleats and gloves to the helmet, then reaching through the hole in the pads, bringing all the gear into a ball. "Shoot."

"Okay, first question. What is this... machine?"

"This, my friend, is a two thousand two chevy S ten. Not the fastest, most powerful truck on the road, but it'll get you from A to B." DJ pulled up the CD case, placing 'bass' in it's position, and flipping through for 'violent.'

"So there is more than one of these?"

"Oh yeah, many more."

"Okay, question two. Why did you have two weapons in this machine?"

DJ shrugged as he forced the driver side door open, taking much more work. "Personal preference. I do tricks with the knife, and hunt with the gun." DJ looked at the pegasus. "By the way, where is it?"

"You said you do tricks with the knife. Care to explain?"

DJ nodded. "The kind of knife you found is called a balisong, or 'butterfly' knife. I use it seldom for actual work, just for show really."

"Would you be willing to demonstrate?"

DJ popped in the CD. "Not now, trying to see how much damage was done to my stereo. I know the truck's totaled, but maybe I can yank out the speakers and stuff."

"Question three. Would you be willing to submit to testing?"

DJ looked at the pegasus. "Would you be willing to give me my gun back?"

"No."

"There's your answer." He turned the volume in the speakers up, allowing an electric guitar to take over.

The pending madness

DJ looked around at the environment. Green grass with a breeze rolling over the hills. DJ looked down at the grass, getting down on a knee, and yanking several blades up. He stood back up, observing the flawless grass. The colors, the way the wind blew them out of his hand, and even how they felt. He felt a smile grow on his face. Perfect transition. He took a seat in the grass. I guess my subconscious thought that was enough mental torture. He sat down in the grass, looking at the breeze rolling over the hills.

"This kinda sucks, I'm not going to remember this place. It's pretty peaceful." He chuckled to himself. "But then again, I'll forget that hell hole." He laid on the ground, closing his eyes, allowing the wind to blow over his face. He smiled a little. "I'm just glad I kept the DCs from killing me, usually when I don't humor them, they end up going crazy." He let out a sigh. "I was kind of a dick..." he shrugged "They aren't real, like they care."

He sat up, wrapping his arms around his knees. Maybe I could get myself out of it? Wake myself from the coma? He looked at the Glock that had been formed in his hand. It would be pretty nice, wake up in the real world. Real people. Not fake ponies. He chambered a round into the black pistol. Then again, I could just cause myself a massive headache. Wouldn't be the first time. He studied the pistol, looking at every little feature. It's crazy, I know this isn't real, yet, it is so accurate. The grass, the guns, the plays, even that stupid hospital. He tightened his grip on the pistol. There was always one dude that said you couldn't feel in dreams. The same dude also said if you die in dreams, you die in real life.

He laughed a little. But, here I am, in a dream, and I can feel the wind on my face, the grass under my ass, the metal in my hand. He pulled the gun to his temple. "And death doesn't kill you, just wakes you up." He slowly pulled the trigger, time slowed down, almost stopping. He looked over to the gun, the bullet slowly leaving the barrel. He stood up, looking at the bullet. He could even see his reflection, it was distorted and not really him, but in dreams, you are you, but aren't really you. You can be anything and anyone, while being restricted to your own body. Your own mind. DJ looked up at the rolling hills, then back at the bullet. Only this time, he wasn't the only one in the reflection.

Time returned to normal speed as DJ wipped around, raising the pistol, which was now an AR15 with a round in the chamber, to his shoulder. On the other end, stood a dark blue alicorn. Cyan eyes. A moon as the cutie mark. DJ slammed his eyes shut. When I open my eyes, I'm going to be alone. No ponies. No people. None of my personal demons. Just me. Alone in this magnificent dream. His eyes slowly opened, the blue alicorn still standing there, a mixture of fear and sadness on her face.

DJ inched his finger towards the trigger, Luna noticed this, her eyes getting wide. "No! Wait! Please! Not again!" She pleaded.

"DCs aren't welcome right now." His finger now resting on the trigger. "I am sorry, I wish to be alone." DJ pulled the trigger, one bullet left the chamber. It flew through the air, but before it could hit Luna, a loud *ting* noise rang through the dream. DJ' face fell into confusion, he pulled the trigger, three more times, three more *tings* rang out. DJ lowered the gun. "What the hell?" He looked closer, a small, barely noticeable, blue bubble surrounded the princess, her horn slightly glowing.

She let out a sigh of relief. "I was worried that wouldn't work." She took a step closer as dozens of rounds from the AR slammed into the barrier. "Listen, I know you may not want to talk with me right now, and this is an impressive dreamscape, I ask to speak with you."

DJ dropped the AR, forming a pump action shotgun. "Just die already! Fuck!" He screamed, followed by a loud bang, click click, bang, click click, bang, click click.

Luna shook her head. "Will you listen to me please?"

DJ dropped the shotgun. "You don't take the hint do you? I want to be alone!" He grabbed a grenade from his pocket, pulling the pin. "Maybe I can have another transition or wake up." The grenade exploded in DJ's hand, leaving the dream to implode around Luna, forcing her out of his head.

DJ's eyes slowly fluttered open. The first thing he did was grab his nose. "I'm awake!" He yelled. "This is real! I'm finally awake!" He jumped out of the bed, he was just taking in his surroundings. He looked around, a low ceiling, marble pillars, a large circular bed, a balcony that let in massive rays of sunshine. DJ looked over to a mirror. He looked like shit, his mohawk was bushy, his unshaved face held a large amount of hair, all the dirt from the championship was still stained in his skin. He was only in his boxers. He turned to see an open door, and a sink. probably need to wash, most likely smell like shit. He looked at the mirror once again, noticing a pile of clothes, his clothes, folded in a nice pile, clean. DJ shrugged, walking towards the bathroom.

He looked at the small shower. Shrugging, he tossed his boxers to the side. When he turned on the water, it immediately turned a brown color as it washed the dirt and sweat off him. He just stood in the warm water as it poured over his shoulders. He shut the water off after making sure every part of him was clean. And he felt it, he felt fresh. He pulled on his clean underwear, and other clothes, and slowly made his way to the balcony. He pulled back the curtains. "Son of a bitch..." He said as a white pegasus in gold armor flew by, making his rounds.

_______________________________________________

Celestia sat at her throne, ponies walking in and out with their problems and proposals and praises. But her mind was elsewhere. Twilight had suggested that DJ was a human. As much as he resembled and acted like one, she couldn't believe it. Her sister couldn't have possibly brought a creature of war into their peaceful world. The nobles were all talking about the gala, which was less than two months away. What would happen? Would it be more organized? Would the elements be there? The main questions came from Blueblood.

"Auntie, what was that noise the other night? I could hardly sleep!"

"You need not worry, it was an experiment by Luna."

"What about the pounding noise? And the shrill noise last night?"

Celestia narrowed her eyes. "What shrill noise?"

"Well, around one in the morning, I was woken by a shrill noise! It continued for over an hour! It was horrid!"

Celestia went to speak, when a rather loud conversation started outside the doors. Celestia strained her ears to hear it. "...ve a fuck is she's in there or not! Just show me where I can get breakfast!"

"No way we are leaving our post, this is obviously a trap!"

"Are you kidding me? I just want to eat! I'm starving!"

"Why don't you eat what's in that bottle?"

"I need water for it, dumbass. Just point in the general direction! Damn."

Celestia heard enough, her horn emitted a bright glow, throwing open the doors, to reveal two guards with their horns glowing, and a very angry human, with his blue shaker. The guards snapped to attention when they realized the doors opened. "Princess! This thing was wanting entrance to the throne room during day court."

"Thing? Are you kidding me?" DJ looked straight at the guard. "Bitch, this thing has a name!"

"DJ!" Celestia said, rather loud. He turned his eyes to the white alicorn. "Is it necessary for you to speak that way to the guards?"

He smiled. "I always talk shit, just who I am." DJ raised his shaker. "Any clue where I could grab breakfast?"

She smiled a little. "Why don't you join us? We were going to have some here very soon."

He shrugged. "Sure, I guess Luna spoke with you?"

She nodded. "She told me how it was all a mistake. You are not really an evil force, but a lost foal."

DJ sighed. "I guess I should apologize." He looked around the courtroom at all the ponies staring with strange looks. "You bitches g..."

"DJ..."

He let out another sigh. "Sorry. Anyway, I apologize for acting the way I did. It was uncalled for, using my people's jargon. I thought this was a dream, and well... I thought this wasn't real. I was just saying things to keep my subconscious from flippin' shit." Blueblood stood up, about to say something, when DJ pointed his finger at him. "Sit 'cho ass down! I ain't done!" Blueblood looked livid, but did take his seat. "Anyway, I just want to say, I'm sorry."

Celestia smiled. "The dungeon did something then?"

DJ waved his hand at Celestia. "Just had some tim..." He was cut off by magic blast to the chest, sending him flying into a wall ten yards behind him.

"Do not worry, Princess! I will protect you from the monster!" A blue noble yelled, charging his horn for another blast.

DJ stood up, shaking. "Do it again ya little bitch! See what happens!" He yelled as he spit a large amount of blood onto the floor. "Come get some!"

"Enough!" Celestia's voice sounded. "Guards, please escort Sir Flow out of the castle."

He snickered. "Probably best, wouldn't want to hurt the thing."

"Actually, I am doing it for your safety, while DJ may not have magic, he does have tools that could best you easily."

"Damn straight!" DJ yelled. He looked around the room. "Erm, where do I sit, exactly?"

"Princess! This is absurd! Why should I leave?" He asked as two guards walked up beside him.

"Well, you just attacked a guest that has done nothing to you. He could press charges." Celestia looked to DJ. "If you like, you could take the seat by mine?"

DJ nodded. "Sounds great." He made his way to the open space by Celestia, eying the blue unicorn the whole time. "So, when is breakfast?"

Celestia looked at a large clock on the wall. "About five minutes. We were discussing the upcoming Grand Galloping Gala, would you like to join our conversation?"

DJ shook his head. "Actually, I just want to go home. So I don't plan on being here much longer."

Celestia let out a sigh. I knew he would bring that up. "Did Luna not tell you?"

DJ looked up as he pulled the headphones through his shirt. "No, I kinda ended the dream early, I wasn't in a talking mood."

Celestia looked into DJ's icy eyes. "The spell that brought you here... was one way."

"What are you saying?"

"We will have to find a different way to get you home. The spell that was used was simply for bringing in things. When we try to send things back through, they burn on contact with the portal."

DJ's face fell. "So... I can't go home?"

Celestia gave a small smile. "I never said that, I just said that the portal we used to get you here, couldn't send you back. There is most likely a spell that could send you back, somewhere in our library."

"How long would it take to find it?"

Before she could speak, Celestia was interrupted by multiple unicorns in black and white suits, giving menus to all the nobles. Fear entered their eyes when they saw DJ, but he received a menu, still. "What will you be having today?" Entered the large room.

"The usual." Celestia said to the waiter.

"Of course, and for you.... sir..." the waiter looked at DJ.

"Gimme a minute, forgot I gotta eat vegitarian crap here." He scanned the menu. "Yeah, how much is this fruit bowl?"

"This is the day court, sir... everything is complimentary."

"Ah, sweet! I'll take five, and a large glass of water." DJ said with a smile, handing the menu back to the waiter. He looked back at Celestia. "You were saying?"

"I do not know how long it would take to find the spell. But I can assure you, I will personally look for it."

"Which brings me to another point." DJ leaned forward. "I can't just mooch off the government for everything I need, what am I? A democrat? No. I need a job, my own money. There is a problem with this, though. I am an alien in your world, the odds I am going to get hired anywhere are slim to none."

Celestia smiled, looking at DJ's fingers. "Oh, I think I know a place that would hire you."

"Really? Where?" He asked, leaning back as the waiter dropped the bowls in front of him, as well as the water.

"Have you ever heard of the 'Canterlot Luxury Spa?"

DJ looked up to Celestia, shaking the white contents of the shaker into a liquid. "You're joking, right? No way in hell I'm working at a spa."

She nodded. "You don't have to shine hooves or give mud baths, you could sweep the floors?" Until they convince you otherwise.

"And what makes you think they'll hire me?" He asked, tilting his head back, chugging the liquid.

She shrugged. "Just a hunch." She turned to the court. "Now, back to business. We need some new ideas for this year's Gala."

DJ laughed a little. "I'm out." He placed the buds in his ears, turning the music to the max.

Blueblood looked at the alien in disgust. "That isn't going to be there, is it?" He said, pointing to DJ, who had his eyes closed, bobbing his head, munching on an apple.

Celestia looked to DJ. "I am unsure, maybe it would be a good way to alert the public of his being here?"

"You can't be serious! Look at it!" He protested.

Celestia looked to DJ, who was mouthing some rather vulgar words. "Why not? Maybe he can tell us some of his stories, or teach us his game?"

"Games? Auntie, this is a formal party! We do not need games."

Celestia smiled. "His game is not like those that Pinkie Pie from Ponyville brought. These games..." Celestia used her magic to raise DJ's arm up.

"Yo, what the fuck are you doing?" He asked, trying to brush off the aura of light.

"...Require much more strategy, strength, and stamina." His scars were brightened, showing every mark. She released his arm, receiveing a death glare, but eventually faded away.

"So not only is he an alien, but he is prone to violence! Just look what he did to Cash Flow!"

DJ removed a headphone. "Great time to transition songs, 'eh? What was your name again? 'White snobby bitch?' WSB, sweet. Now listen here, I didn't do shit."

Blueblood started to frown. "How dare you! I am royal blood!"

DJ laughed. "Born and raised in 'Merica, buddy. I don't buy into that monarchy shit. I don't give two shits who you're related to. But, for the sake of the matter, who are you related to? How do you posses royal blood?"

"I am his aunt." Celestia spoke up. "I believe we need to keep this room in a state of peace. I wish for both of you to silence yourselves unless you have something important to say."

DJ gave a half ass salute. "Yes'm." He put his headphone back in, tilting his phone sideways. Celestia leaned back to see what was happening on the screen. A green field with a large blue N in the center, multiple bipeds running around.

"DJ, is this your game?" Celestia asked, taking out DJ's headphone again.

He smiled a little. "Yeah, this was the first of the year, against Chick."

"Would you mind explaining what's going on?" She asked.

DJ leaned forward. "Sure, you see, right now, we are on defense. See those two?" DJ pointed to the coaches on the sidelines. "They give us the call. Right now, it is black seven."

_______________________________________________________________________

This is fucking embarrassing! DJ screamed in his head as he grabbed another bottle of lotion. That day, Celestia took DJ to one of the only places that would potentially hire him. The Canterlot Luxury Spa. He protested, but was eventually convinced otherwise when he was told it could very possibly be the only job he could land until after the Gala, when he would be introduced to the public.

When he first applied, he was only wanting night duty clean up, prepping everything for the next day, but somehow or another, he got dragged into renovating a back room that was hardly used, into a massage room, with the speakers and subs from his truck to play music. He set up a playlist of his calmest dubstep songs, mainly made up by Lindsey Sterling.

When he learned the real reason behind the new room, he wanted to quit, right there. But, being the only job he could land, he had to stay. His only legitimate argument besides "I don't want to, dammit!" was that he had no training. No way to really perform the way that would satisfy a customer. He thought it was a solid plan, until he was put into personal training for two weeks.

He hated every bit of it. But, even though he does, he can't say he hates his job. His pay is outrageous, and the tips are higher than a thirty year old pot head. Reason being, the little things on his hands called fingers. He didn't know what it was about them, but all his customers had a similar reaction, complete relaxation. His customers never saw him though, it was a rule of the room. They walked in, laid on the table, got their message, and left. Sometimes, he would see the same pony multiple times in one day.

As DJ finished the latest customer, he wiped his hands on a towel, and went back behind the curtain. "Thank you for coming to Canterlot Luxury Spa, I hope you enjoyed your stay. Have a nice day." He said in the "cheery" voice that was mandatory for all employees.

"No, thank you!" The customer said, closing the door behind her.

DJ let out a long breath of air, checking his watch. "That should be it, closin' time." He said, pulling his phone off the auxiliary cable. It was amazing to him, his phone stayed at full battery, and he never charged it. He looked at the calendar on the wall behind the one way mirror into the entrance. "Alright, I have six in a row tomorrow, wait about thirty minutes, then all my regulars." He said, punching the new information into his own calendar on his phone, opening his calculator. "Okay, so the six, with the normal thirty, that'll be around nine-hundred bits, before I add in the tips."

He watched Gentle Hooves lock the door, turning to the black window. "Alright, you can come and collect your money.."

DJ walked around to the front, grabbing the large jar of coins. "All eight-hundred in here?"

She laughed a little. "Of course, I'm thinking of raising your pay even more. It's forty per massage right now, and I keep getting more and more busy!" She walked over to the calendar. "Do you realize you will have forty regulars by next week?"

"That's incredible!" He said, pouring the bits into his black bag, which would be safely stored in the royal vault, with the rest of his earnings.

She smiled. "I am guessing you wish to head back to the castle now?"

"But of course, with the Gala just this next Monday, I can already tell business will skyrocket. I need rest." He said with a laugh.

She nodded. "Alright, just hold still. You'll be in your room in a second." Her horn lit up, wrapping DJ in a soft white glow, a large flash, and DJ fell to the floor in his room.

"So much better than walking." He said, tossing the bag to the side. "Just wish it was possible to fix 'Lil Red."

______________________________________________________________

"Girls! Girls!" Rarity yelled, running into the small restaurant. "I have great news!"

Twilight and her friends looked at the white unicorn. "What is it?" Twilight had been asked by Princess Celestia to help with the Gala this year, instead of just attend, so they had to get there a couple days early.

"I got us all appointments for the Canterlot Luxury Spa!" She squeed.

"We already had appointments?" Applejack said, curiosity in her voice.

"I know, but I did even better!"

"Better?" Rainbowdash flew over to Rarity. "I already don't want to go, what could make it better?"

Rarity smiled. "A friend told me of a new stallion that only does massages there, and he is absolutely wonderful!"

Twilight had a look of concern on her face. "A stallion?"

"Well, Twilight, he isn't just any stallion. He makes you melt in his hooves, while a soothing violin fills the air, as he talks to you about your day." She looked around. "But it's strange, she said that nopony has ever seen him. But he is worth every bit!"

"Oh, how much did it cost?" Fluttershy asked.

Rarity waved her hoof. "No need to talk about that." She looked at Twilight. "It is the day after we land. You are first to get it."

Twilight was taken back. "Why me?"

"Oh, you've been so worried about the Gala and the human, you need to relax." She wrapped a hoof around her purple friend. "And he will do just that, make you feel like there's absolutely nothing going on."

"Well, I guess you're right." She looked at Rarity. "But, what is his name?"

"He calls himself 'DéJà.'"

Pinkie jumped out of her chair. "Oh! Like déjà vu?"

Rarity looked at Pinkie. "Exactly like that." She laughed a little. "Very exotic, isn't it?"

Applejack rubbed her shoulders. "I guess 'ah could use a massage."

Twilight looked at her friends. "Well, it's getting late, and we have a train to catch tomorrow. I'll see you girls later." They all said goodbye, and Twilight made her way back home, where she would spend another sleepless night thinking about the alien and the most important party of the year.

_____________________________________________

Edited by Sanity

Double the fun, double the stress

This chapter does contain some sexual themes, though not many.

I can't believe I'm doing this. Luna walked through the many hallways in the castle. Ever since she brought DJ into her world, Celestia put her in charge of keeping the nobles quiet. It was a pain, mainly due to the first couple nights, of the scientists and him playing the music on and off. As much as she hated it, she was looking forward to the Gala, when she would no longer be in charge of keeping his presence a secret.

But now it was even harder. Twilight and her friends had all arrived earlier that day. And, of course, Twilight wanted to see the human. And Luna had to tell her no. What was even worse, was Twilight almost getting past the guards into his room. While, yes, he was still at work at the spa, Celestia had permitted him to acquire his knife and shotgun, for safety reasons. It would have been very bad if the purple unicorn got ahold of either one.

But now, Princess Luna was tired, and she just woke up. She was sore. She was stressed. And she was overworked. (Or, so she thought.) And from all the nobles in the court, when they weren't complaining about the way things were going, or asking questions about DJ, they were givinh praise to the newest addition to Canterlot Luxury Spa. DèJà. Luna knew exactly who it was, and as embarrassed as she was about it, she had no choice.

Luna walked up to the two guards posted by the door. "He is in there, correct?"

"Yes, your highness! But, he requested to be left alone?"

Luna raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Why would he request to be alone, I wonder?" She said to herself. She looked at the guard. "I wish to see him."

"Of course!" The guards stepped to the side, allowing Luna to open the door to the room.

Luna walked in to see DJ, with only shorts on. No socks or shirt. He had sweat pouring off his body. He was looking at the wall opposite of Luna, with the same motion. Left elbow, right knee, right elbow, left knee. Extending the opposite leg to full length each time. He had his earbuds in, the music loud enough they Luna could hear the beat from the doorway. When three louds beeps from them sounded off, he rolled from his back to his stomach, into a pushup position. Never looking up. Three more beeps sounded, and he began to push himself away from the floor, only to fall back down.

Luna knew just speaking to him wouldn't work, she popped the buds out of his ears. His head immediately shot up. "Busy. Be gone." He said in a monotone voice, continuing to work.

"You will not talk to Princ..." One of the guards started.

"Shut your mouth, bitch! I wasn't talking to you!" DJ put his buds back in. "Leave."

Luna looked at the guards, slamming the door, and popping out DJ's earbuds again. "I have a favor to ask."

DJ stood to his feet, breathing heavily. He walked over to Luna. "A favor? You interrupted me to walk the trash to the curb?"

She let out a sigh. "Is DéJá in?"

DJ turned around. "You have to have an appointment. Days in advance."

She chuckled a little. "I thought you would say that." Her magic flashed, a bag hit the floor. "Five-hundred bits."

His eyes got wide. "Sweet Jesus!" He looked at Luna. "Let me take a shower first, then you teleport us."

"Of course."

As DJ made his way to the shower, he stopped, pointing at Luna. "If you tell ANYONE about this, I'll get you."

She laughed. "How so?"

He smiled. "I walk into Canterlot, no guards, with my gun, firing into the air, demanding glue." He gave a wink as he closed the door behind him.

"So, is this the music you were listening to in your room?" Luna asked as a violin and bass combination filled the air.

DJ looked at the labels on the different scented bottles. "No, this is much more calm." DJ grabbed a third bottle with his little fingers, comparing the stats on each. "Whenever I work out, I tend to end with sore muscles and ringing ears."

Luna laid herself on the table. "Why were you working out this late? It's almost eleven?"

DJ shrugged. "The same reason you want this." He looked over to Luna. "Stress relief."

She frowned a little. "How so? It doesn't seem like it?"

DJ adjusted the subwoofers for more kick, then made his way to Luna. "Pain is weakness leaving the body. Stress is a mental pain, however, it doesn't leave. So, I strain my muscles, changing the mental pain, to physical. Water and protein then wash it all away."

Luna smiled a bit. "I still don't understand."

DJ sighed. "Listen, this is awkward as fuck already. Not only do you know who I am, but you don't have the facial cooking on your face to keep your eyes sealed shut. I'm going to treat you like any other customer though." He let out a longer sigh. "Roll over on your back..."

Luna blushed a bit. "Huh?"

"Just do it, dammit! This is already awkward! Do I need to put a towel over your eyes, knock you out?"

"Okay." She replied, rolling over, closing her eyes.

"Alright, are there any areas, besides the obvious, thag I need to steer away from?"

"N-no... I don't think so." She replied.

"Alright..." DJ cracked every bone from his neck to fingers. "Let's get this over with."

SORRY GUYS, NO UNDERSIDE MASSAGES, TOO CLOSE TO BELLY RUBS, AND I DON'T WANT TO BE THE CAUSE OF DIABETUS!

After nine minutes, DJ removed his hands. "Alright, I'll give you a minute to roll over and get ready for the back."

Luna was a tad disappointed, shw wanted more! She wanted those ten digits to dig into her stomach more, but she knew that he wasn't enjoying it, so she complied. She rolled onto her stomach, stretching out her wings to a more comfortable position. "Alright." She said.

DJ walked out from his curtain. "Same drill, any areas that you want me to steet clear from, apart from the obvious?"

"No." She replied.

"Alright, well, since you are an alicorn, this may take a little longer." Luna smiled. No problem. "Don't smile!just, lay your head over, and relax. Now, I'm going to do something that may seem uncomfortable at first, but trust me."

Luna nodded her head, before laying it on the soft pillow. DJ grasped his fists into a tight ball, applying pressure from the lower back, all the way up through the flight muscles, which caused her to squee a little, reaching the back or her neck, where he opened his hands, resting his fingers on her shoulders, digging his fingers through the muscles.

His hands fell back down her back, falling in the outsides of her wings.his fingers wrapped around the wings, as close to the joint in her back as possible. He gave a gentle tug, emitting two loud pops, and a moan of satisfaction from the princess.DJ laughed a little. "Haven't had that done in a while, huh?"

Luna kept her eyes shut as his hands worked between her wings, releasing every knot, stretching every muscle, and almost putting her to sleep. "Huh-uh." Was all she could get out.

"I usually talk with the customer during this part, would you like a conversation or just relaxation?"

"I have a c-c-c..." Luna was stopped when DJ's fingers made their way between her wings again, this time, each individual finger pushing against the muscles, separateing them the same way you would your bicep. When he moved up to her shoulders, she continued. "A couple questions."

"Alright." He said as he placed a magic restriction ring at the base of Luna's horn, for safety reasons once he began to work that area. "What's on your mind?"

"How do you know so much about dreams?" She asked, before she was unable to speak. DJ's fingers with the sweet scented lotion traveled down her horn in the spiral. No Luna! Stay awake! She screamed in her head.

"It's called 'lucid dreaming' and was discovered a long time ago by these monks. They learned that it was possible to get the conscious mind into dreams."

"And everpony knows of it?" She asked as he removed the ring, moving his fingers down her sides, before reaching the hind legs, just under her flank, making her blush a little.

"No. Everyone has dreams every night. However, most of your dreaming happens in REM sleep, which is when your eyes dart back and forth under your eyelids. When you remember a dream, it is most likely due to waking up during the REM sleep. When you sleep in, you may not be able to remember the dreams, because now, they are no longer images in your head, to just thoughts that vanish." He chuckled a bit. "However, I do know about the capabilities of dreams, and I use it for whatever I want. Because it's a dream, I can literally do anything."

Luna thought on this for a second. "How are your dreams so vivid?"

"This probably won't make any sense to you, but it's the only way I can describe it. You have two TVs. One is a shitty, black and white TV, while the other is a HD3D TV that comes with WiFi. The shitty TV, is shit, and the HD is amazingly better. Now, once you learn to lucid dream, for me anyway, it was like real life, reality, right now, is the shitty black and white TV, while the dreams are the HD3D TV. Understand?" DJ asked, right as he got back to her shoulders, giving her an extra thirty seconds longer than normal.

"No, not really." She said, almost fading into a sleep of her own. DJ removed his hands, and started to gather his things.

"That's it. I hope you enjoyed it." DJ said as he sat behind the curtain.

Lhna got up from the table. "Yes." You have no idea! Luna stood up from the table, extending her wings out, there was a glow coming from her, the lotion used. "I actually have another question, if you don't mind?"

DJ locked up the stuff, grabbed his phone, and walked back to Luna. "And what's that?"

"What's a nigger?"

___________________________________________________________

"Twilight! Twilight hurry up! We're gonna be late!" Pinkie said as she jumped up and down on the large sofa.

Twilight let out a long yawn as she brushed her mane. "Why did Rarity have to schedule it so early?"

On que, Rarity walked through the door. "Because, Twilight, this was the only time I could get us all in at once!"

Twilight let out a sigh. "Alright, I'm ready. Let's get going. Don't want to be late." She said as they made their way out of the room. The other three were patiently waiting outside.

They all started down the many hallways in the palace. They chatted about the Gala, how much better this one would be, what they would do, all that good stuff. They talked about the plan at the spa, and how they couldn't wait to be under DèJà's control. Rainbow still wasn't happy about it. Twilight looked over at one of the hallways. The one that was off limits. The one with the human.

Completely unguarded.

Twilight looked over to her friends. "You girls go ahead, I'll catch up." She said.

"Alright, just don't be late, remember, you're first!" Rarity said.

Twilight smiled. "I won't be." She said, as she started down the long hallway.

There were six doors. Three on each side. She opened the first four, with the same things in each. A well made bed, and clean everything. Twilight walked to the next door, and surprise surprise, it was locked, unlike the others. She left it be, checking the last room, which was the same as the others.

She walked to the locked door. Her horn started to glow, grabbing the lock from the other side of the door, rotating it until there was a loud click. Twilight smiled as she rotated the handle, allowing the door to swing open.

The first thing Twilight noticed was the bed, which was made, but sloppy. Like ot was just thrown together. She looked by the dresser, which is what drew her into the room. A large blue bag, a pile of armor, a black stick, and a long item made of wood, with multiple red and gold items in a box beside it. There was also a black watch, a silver ring with a blue gem, a blue and yellow braided bracelet, and a black one with white writing. As well as four books, and multiple notebooks. A black bottle and wite bag, and a larger white bottle, with a metal spiral ball in the bottom.

Twilight grabbed the books with her magic, reading the titles out loud. "Physics, To Kill a Mockingbird, Holy Bible, and Day Planner..." She put them down, grabbing the top notebook. "If an apple, weighing zero point four kilograms falls to the Earth, using what you know, what is the Earth's acceleration?" She smiled a little. So, he's intelligent.

She closed the notebook, grabbing the black stick. When she picked it up, it extended, leaving two black sticks, and a silver blade. Her eyes got wide. "So, he's armed too..." she folded back the blade, picking up the silver ring next. A large 54 on one side, with MLB underneath. The other side had the head of a roaring bear, with 2013 underneath. She grabbed the black bracelet as well. "I Am Second." She shrugged, setting them down, looking at the armor.

She laid out everything from the pile, but mainly looking at the helmet. All the different color marks, the deep gouges in the black mask, revealing rusted metal. "This was used.... and a lot." She said, before putting the pile back together.

Then she looked at the wood object.

She picked it up with her magic, looking at all the features. The wood was sturdy, and the metal still strong. While she was looking, her magic shifted, emitting a loud click from the object. Twilight rotated the object, seeing a large hole. She looked at the box that was next to the object. "I wonder..." she grabbed one of the red objects, placing it inside the hole. Her magic shifted again, another loud click, and the hole closed. She smiled. "Alright, now what..." she looked all around, the only things she could find was a lever, and a button. When she tried the lever, it would hardly move. She pressed the button. "Huh, that didn't d..." her magic caught the lever, igniting the shell, causing a massive explosion inside the gun, sending multiple metal bullets through the ceiling. Twilight hit the floor, her ears ringing. She heard hooves coming straight for her. She used every last ounce of concentration she had, and teleported out of the room, to a bathroom. Just as her friends were walking by.

As Twilight and her friends walked through the door to the spa, they were met with a warm smile. "Good morning, and welcome to Canterlot Luxury Spa! I am guessing you are here for the full experience?" She asked.

Rarity walked forward. "Yes, we have an appointment, for each of us to rotate in the stations, then get a massage from D..." she stopped talking when the black mirror and all the pony's bones started to vibrate.

Gentle Hooves gave an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, DèJá likes to test his equipment's capabilities." She said as she knocked on the window. The shaking stopped, and two knock sounded back. "There, he is getting everything ready." She said with a smile.

"You just knocked, what does that mean?" Twilight asked, looking at the mirror.

"Oh, it was just to get his attention. You see, what we see as a mirror, is just a dark window for him."

Applejack stared at the mirror. "So he can see us, but we can't see him?"

Gentle Hooves nodded. "Correct, now, we'll start you all off w..." she stopped, eyes getting wide as the door opened. She bowed. "Princess Celestia, mind I ask what you are doing here this early? You don't have an appointment."

Celestia nodded. "I must speak with D..." Her eyes saw Twilight and her friends. "DèJá. Something has come up, and we need him."

"But, what of our massages?" Rarity asked, sticking out her bottom lip.

Celestia smiled. "It shouldn't take too long. We just need him for a short while." She started walking towards the door. "He's in there, correct?"

Ms. Hooves nodded. "Like always."

As Celestia closed the door behind her, Twilight's curiosity went through the roof. When nopony was paying attention, she teleported to the door, pressing her ear against it. A male voice was already speaking. "...e's been in my room?"

Celestia's voice came next. "It appears somepony made it into your room, setting off your shotgun."

"How did they set off my gun? Safety was on and it was unloaded. I checked it before I left, like every morning, only thing different was I didn't latch my butterfly."

"Ponies heard a loud explos..."

Her voice was cut off by the male. "There's a shadow by the door. Someone's listening." Twilight's heart skipped a beat. "Let's continue this elsewhere." There was a clicking noise, then a bright flash. Twilight slowly opened the door. Nopony in sight.

_____________________________________________________

DJ threw the door open, scientists and guards surrounding the things. "Get out." He looked at the guards. "You didn't do your jobs." He turned to the scientists. "And you already know everything. Get out."

The guards stood up, rage burning in their eyes. "We did your jobs with perfection!"

DJ had a sarcastic baby voice. "So, is that why the big bad boom stick went off?" He went back to normal. "If you did your job, I wouldn't fuckin' be here right now!"

Before the guard could say anything, Celestia entered the room. "I believe we should respect DJ's requests. He knows more of how these things work than we do." She looked to DJ. "Is anything else wrong?"

DJ walked over to the dresser. "My gloves aren't tied together, cleats aren't tied to helmet, my watch is undid, bracelets aren't ontop of one another, notebooks rearranged." He looked at Celestia. "They fucked with everything."

"Is anything missing?"

DJ grabbed the gun, emitting a clicking noise, as a red shell fell to the floor. "Nope, all here." The clicking continued, to be sure it was not loaded. "By the looks, it was just curiosity. "

"I do not know anypony that would try and get in here."

DJ looked at Celestia. "Are you serious?" She nodded. "Who did Luna get onto just yesterday for almost sneaking past the guards, while I was in here?"

Celestia sighed. "Twilight...."

"Damn straight." He looked at the shotgun. "In all honesty, I think this would be safest with me."

Her eyes got wide. "At the spa?"

He nodded. "Think! We leave it here, someone is going to get their grimy little fingers on it, and go on a killing spree." DJ grabbed the box of shells. "Best bet is to have it in controlling hands."

Celestia rubbed her chin. "I suppose you are correct."

He sighed. "I need to get back to work." He looked at the gun. "I'll keep 'er hidden. With me at all times." He grabbed the knife, putting it in his pocket. "This too."

DJ finished Twilight's underside without having to say anything except what was required. He cleared his throat. "Alright, I'm gonna go sit down while you flip over."

"Uh-huh." Was the responce.

He grabbed his tools as he waited, the restrictor, more lotion, and a comb. When he assumed she was ready, he walked out, Twilight laid out on her stomach. "Alright, any places i need to steer clear of?"

"Uh, my horn is kinda... sensitive..."

No shit. "Don't worry." DJ's fingers wrapped the restrictor around Twilight's horn. "This is just for my safety." He laughed a little. "First day, had some mare almost blow the place apart."

There was a short rapid nod. "I-I-I u-under-understand."

He squirted lotion onto his hands, working his way down her horn. His fingers found the spiral, and followed it down. "So, what are you and your friends doing in Canterlot?"

"G-Ga-Gala..."

"That's nice, here to see the Princess?" Fucking bitch.

"N-No.... H-hu-human...."

DJ laughed. "So, is that why you're so tense? Worried about a human?" She gave a quick nod. "They don't even exist."

He grabbed a towel, wipping the excess off her horn. "W-wha-what's a-a sh-sh-shotgun?"

DJ froze. It was this dirty whore that was in my room! "When me and some buds ride in a chariot, we tend to fight over who sits where. The front is the best, so, when we get ready to go anywhere, one of us yells 'shotgun' and they get to sit there."

As he removed the restrictor, small sparks shot out of her horn. Fuck! I read Xenophilia! No good! No good! she let out a soft moan. "Oh............"

DJ held his hands up, backing away from the climaxing pony. Fuck.... I'm a prostitute? People pay me for pleasure... A male prostitute. And I don't even get any! "Erm, you gonna be alright?"

The sparks finally died down. "Y-yes."

DJ grabbed another bottle of lotion. "Alright, I'm getting your back now."

"Alright..."

His hands started to rub the knots out of the pony. And she had a ton. "Geeze, this human's really got you on edge?" She nodded. "What's so bad about him? What's it done?"

She thought for a second. "He hasn't really done anything... more like I'm just really nervous and curious about him."

DJ nodded. "I can relate. Sometimes curiosity can bite ya in the a... butt."

"Want to share your story?"

DJ's heart stopped. FUUUUUUUUUCK! "Well, what do you mean?"

As DJ's fingers continued to massage Twilight, she answered. "How did it bite you?"

"Well, I play a game. A very strategic game. And when I play it, sometimes I forget what I need to do, and let my eyes wander. When they wander, they pick up on t things I shouldn't be worried about, and they fill my head. I wonder what they do. Why they're there. And I forget my job. When I forget my job, I fail at it. When I fail, I get chewed out by my coach."

"What game?" She asked.

___________________________

Twilight was confused. "What game?"

At that time, a low beep rang out. "I'm sorry, but that is all." His hands lifted from her back. "Thank you for coming to Canterlot Luxury Spa. You may clean off your face, and could you send in your friend?"

As Twilight sat up, she heard a curtain close. She wiped off the the ointment to see the room for the first time. White walls, candels all over, and a single black curtain. "Sure." She said. As she stood up on the floor, and she felt amazing. Better than she had in a while.

She opened the door, turning to look in the room, hoping to catch a glimpse of the one that made her feel amazing. Nothing. She sighed as she walked over to the pegasus with the rainbow mane, and ointment on her face. "Rainbowdash, it is your turn."

She nodded. "Alright. I can't see though... how do I go in?"

Ms. Hooves walked over. "I can handle that." She levitated the pegasus into the air. "Just one second."

_______________________________

"Alright, you can roll over now so I can get your back." The voice said. Rainbowdash complied, but had a single thought going through her mind. What the buck just happened? She felt like she had been stretching for days, but it only took ten minutes. She was ready to go. Ready to take down the human the first chance she got.

"Alright, are there any areas I need to steer clear of?"

"No."

"Okay, then let's get started." Rainbow felt the fingers dig into her shoulders, and could already feel the tension releasing. As his hands get to her wings, he laughed a little. "Athletic, aren't we?"

"Fastest flier in all Equestria!" She boasted.

The voice chuckled as his hands wrapped around the base of her wings, tugging until they popped. Rainbow went to scream, but could only let out a moan. "You know, if you want to get better, massages are actually a great thing to get. It allows your muscles to grow more."

"Oh yeah?" She asked. "Hey, when can I take this stuff off my face?"

"When I'm done. And yes, it gives them more room to grow. I knew a pony once, called himself Jay Cutler. He was massive. He got a massage every morning before he started working out."

She laughed a little. "No way I would go to the spa every morning!"

"I have to..." the voice mumbled. "I honestly hate massages, I don't like people touching me." There was a pause. "Almost broke one of my friend's arms once because of that..... I wasn't in the greatest mood and he snuck up on me."

"What happened?"

"Well, I was in a business competition, DECA, and it was my first time there. I was expected to win by my father and coach. Failure was not an option, I was stressing out. Ever had that feeling? Knowing if you failed, it was all over?"

"You have no idea!" Rainbow thought back to when she was curled in a ball in fear of just that. Failure, afraid she wouldn't be able to pull off her routine, the sonic rainboom.

"Well, I was not in my comfort zone. At all. Black suit and tie, couldn't breath, just horrible. I was stressing out. I felt my heart racing, faster than ever. I had no way to practice this. I was to assume the role of a vice president for a major natural gas company, and solve problems. I was five minutes away from going in, my head racing. What do I say? How do I look? What will the problem be?

"So I'm pacing, and I see a blue shirt out of the corner of my eye. I just ignored it, continuing to pace. Then, I felt a hand grip me shoulder. In just a second, I had the wrist wrapped in my hand, and my other hand on his 'bow. I was not in the mood. But then I realized who it was. An old friend that had moved rhe last year. Wil."

"The minotaur?"

"...Yeah..."

"So what happened?"

"I got first place, and was signed up to go to Cali. A six thousand dollar scholarship to OCU in buisness management."

She sighed. "You're an egghead."

"Egghead? Really? You think I just sit around and read books all day?" The voice laughed. "Not quiet. I hate reading, but, it's required. We have to read things we hate all the time, so might as well be good at it."

Rainbow was confused. "Wait, so you are a minotaur going to a college, with... dollars instead of bits, but you hate to read..."

Rainbow was about to wipe the ointment off, when there was a plee. "No! You can't wipe that off yet!"

Her hoof made contact to her face, wiping the stuff away from her eyes. She opened them, seeing candles everywhere. The turned her head to the voice. "So w..." her eyes got wide. "You..."

The human put his hands up. "Please, don't do a..."

"TWILIGHT!"

"...nything drastic."

Bad news, or dead news?

"TWILIGHT!" The cyan pegasus yelled, as he leaped from the table, over to the door.

DJ put up his hands. Fuck my life! "Alright, just ca..."

He was cut off when a powerful thrust of her wings sent her straight into his gut, knocking the breath out of him. "Stay back, monster!"

DJ backed away. "Last chance to calm the fuck down, before things get real ugly." He pleaded.

She snorted, pawing the ground like a bull. "TWILIGHT! HELP!"

DJ sighed. "Alright, you asked for it." He put his legs shoulder width apart, left toes to the middle of his right foot. He crouched down, putting his hands at his hips. His shoulders lurched forward a little, he then remembered he was not in pads, and his collar wasn't with him. He also realized he also only had a couple feet to get as fast as possible. He pushed his legs back, and placed his right hand on the ground, putting his left arm at a ninety degree angle at his hip.

He watched her. Waiting. He needed something to read. Something to go off of, a foot placement, a muscle twitch, her eyes. Anything that would hint where she was going. He needed to hit her head on. He was bigger, but she was faster. Once he got up to full speed, it was like getting hit by a truck, but it took several yards. The pegasus could get to his speed in just a few feet, but she was lighter. It's all physics. I have to be fast, force equals mass time acceleration. I just have to go... Rainbow took a step forward. NOW!

DJ started his assault, pumping his arms in the small room, the gap between the two quickly closing. While Rainbow's hooves were extended, and wings pumping, DJ had his arms pumping, but was already lower to the ground, as to get more leverage on the attacker. When they were mere inches away, his hands shot up into her pits, changing his horizontal motion to vertical. His legs, chest, and shoulders all exploded with force. His hands gripped onto her fur, no way in hell she was getting free.

He slammed the pony onto the ceiling, then in a rolling motion, brought her to the ground, crashing on top of her. She let out a small yelp as all air escaped her body. He took his lethal shot. He rolled over, wrapping his right arm around her neck, the windpipe right in the bend of his elbow. He grasped his right hand with the left, pulling it while flexing his bicep.

"You done fucked up!" He said, tightening his grip. He could see her changing colors. "Not so tough now, are ya?" He eased up a little, allowing her to take a deep breath, the regained his hold. He laughed a little. "Coulda avoided this." He walked over to the black window, the pegasus kicking with silent screams.

He knocked on the glass, getting Gentle Hooves' attention. He let Rainbow get a breath again. He didn't want to kill her, but no way in hell he was letting her walk free. The owner walked to the window. "Yes DéJà?" She asked through the small drilled holes.

"We've got a breach. Level four. Detained."

Her eyes got wide. "I will have the Princess here right away!" She said, before starting to write a letter.

DJ shrugged, looking down at the struggling pony. "Aww, what's wrong? Did the big bad monster get you? Was he quicker than you thought?" He loosened his grip for an answer.

"TW..." She started to scream, but the arm tensed up again.

"No no no, bad Wonderbolt wannabe, bad!" He said, shaking his finger. She started kicking even more. All he could do was laugh. Until the door to the small room was thrown open by a purple glow. Like I said before, fuck my life!

"Put her down!" Twilight said, already charging her horn. Applejack had her rope, Pinkie with her cannon, Rarity's horn was also glowing. And Fluttershy was hiding behind them all.

"Get back." He said in a calm voice, reaching into his pocket, pulling out the butterfly, letting the razor dance around his fingers before coming to a stop. The hilt latched in his hand, the blade pressed to Rainbow's temple. "Now." He let his grip loosen a bit, Rainbow took in a deep breath of air, then DJ regained his grip.

Twilight took a step forward. "Y..."

"I said get back." He looked through the window behind him, the letter catching flame from Ms. Hooves' horn. "I think we can help each other here." Twilight narrowed her eyes, not believing him. "You want your friend back. I want to keep my job. You leave, and say nothing, and I will release your friend." He pointed his blade at Twilight. "And I won't charge you for breaking and entering."

Applejack looked at Twilight. "What's he talkin' about, Twi'?"

Before Twilight could answer, a loud pop and bright light filled the room. DJ smiled, releasing the pegasus to the ground. She coughed, trying to fill her lungs with precious air. When she looked up, she saw a white alicorn. "Princess..." she coughed more. "Celestia! He tried to kill me!" She said, her face regaining color.

Celestia let out a sigh. "I believe we need to speak of this somewhere else." She looked at DJ. "Will you be fine here?"

DJ danced the razor back into his pocket. "'Course."

Before Twilight could say anything, another pop filled the room, and the seven ponies were gone, leaving the human alone to pick up the mess. He started to pick everything up, his next appointment was a couple, a captain for the royal guard, and a princess. DJ smiled to himself. Cadence and Armor, oh this is going to be just bundles of joy!

_________________________________________________________

Twilight let her eyes focus, realizing she was in the throne room, she started to panic. "Princess! W..."

"Twilight, there is something you need to know." Celestia said as she sat in her throne.

Rainbow rubbed her throat. "He almost killed me!"

Celestia sighed. "As much as you will want to argue with me, I ask that you please listen. DJ acted in self defense." She held up a hoof. "This is how I know. DJ, has told and demonstrated to me and my sister, that while he does taunt more than anypony should, and does use language that is not approved by all, he does not attack ponies, but only defends himself."

"But he held a knife to Rainbow's head!" Twilight countered.

Celestia looked at Rainbow Dash. "What exactly happened?"

"Well... he was getting ready to eat me!"

"And you know this for a fact?"

Rainbow looked at the ground. "Well, he had his hands on my back!"

Celestia wouldn't show, but she could not believe what she was hearing. "Is that not his job? He works at the Canterlot Luxury Spa as a massage therapist. He requires an appointment days in advance, and you to wear a ointment mask, to both cleanse your face and keep him hidden. Did you remove your mask?"

"Yes..." She said, ears flat.

"Then what?"

"I... I screamed for Twilight. And hit him in his stomach."

"And, how did he react?"

"He, he told me if I didn't stop, it would get ugly." She pawed at the ground. "And it got ugly."

Twilight had enough. "Princess! He held a knife to her head! That's worse than anything Discord ever did!"

As if just the mention of his name was an invitation, the deity surrounded by chaos fell from the ceiling. "Ah, yes! But I like the thing! He reminds me of me!"

Celestia looked at Discord. "You were not to speak with him."

He put his hands up. "I've done no such actions!" He smiled. "But I have observed him."

Celestia narrowed her eyes. "Just remember what I said to you."

As he continued to fall, he melted through the floor. "But of course!" He eventually was completely out of the room. Celestia looked at Twilight.

"Now, I believe you, and Rainbow Dash especially, owe our guest an apology."

Rainbow's eyes got wide. "Why should we apologize?"

"Rainbow Dash..." She said in a motherly tone. "He is lost and alone. He is in constant stress, relying on me and my sister to get him back to where he belongs. To his home. Right now, he is just trying to survive, and refuses help from us. The last thing he needs in enemies. Ponies that attack him and search through his things.

"He doesn't trust us, not at all, and he has made that very clear. He says trust and respect are earned, not given away to anyone. He is not in the least bit at peace." She sighed. "He has been having almost constant nightmares ever since he got here. He wakes drenched in sweat, and tears in his eyes.

"And now he is being attacked while all he was trying to do his job, the only thing he could rely on for peace. What was safe for him to do without worry. Now he can't even do that." She looked at Twilight. "I know you have questions for him, but I am afraid I will have to deny you the promise of them being answered. It is now up to him whether or not he wants to answer, however, I believe we should let him also decide when he wants to answer to you, and accept your apologies."

Fluttershy walked forward. "Umm... Princess... what if I, ah, talked to him?"

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "You would speak with him?"

She nodded. "He's alone. He needs a friend to be there with him." She pawed at the ground. "I was able to help Discord, maybe I can help..."

"DJ..." Celestia said, helping the pegasus.

"Maybe I can help DJ. Give him somepony to trust." She smiled.

Celestia nodded. "Very well, he will be in his room at eight."

Pinkie started bouncing. "Oh! Oh! Can I throw him a 'Welcome to Equestria, and sorry for going through your things and attacking you' party?!"

Celestia smiled a little. "Maybe in time, I do not think he is looking for any more surprises today." She looked at the wall. "And it's not even time for breakfast."

Grumbles from the girls’ stomachs filled the room. "Ah think breakfast sounds mighty fine." Applejack added.

As the Princess and five of the ponies made their way out of the room, a white unicorn was still standing there in awe. "Wha-I don't get my massage and facial?!?!?!"

____________________

DJ's hands dug into the pink alicorn's back. "So, where did you say you were from?"

"From here in Canterlot, but I have recently moved to the Crystal Empire."

DJ grabbed her wings, tugging a bit until a pop filled the room. "Crystal Empire? What's it like there?"

"Beautiful! The ponies are so nice, the place is always sparkling, and it's just all around amazing!"

His hands dug into her back. "And what about your husband? What does he think of it?"

She laughed a little. "He misses the action from the guard, but likes coaching the ponies for the Equestrian Games."

DJ paused for a second. Did I miss an episode? Must be new. "So your husband is not only the captain of the guard, but also married to the Princess ruling over the Crystal Empire, and a coach?"

"That would be correct."

"How exactly does he coach?"

She paused for a second. "What do you mean?"

"Is he up in his athlete's face, or is he more of an encouragement kinda guy?"

She thought about it for a second. "A little of both, he's always yelling at them, but at the same time, giving them advice."

"Really? I kinda knew a coach like that." His thoughts went back to coach Rohr, or 'Penguin Pussy' as all the linemen called him, his freshman year.

After a few minutes, Cadence still hadn't said anything else. Then, she finally spoke up. "You are... different."

He laughed. "You're not the first to say that."

She shook her head. "No, not like that. I mean, I can feel what you've been through. You have so much love, all around you, and flowing through your body. Yet, you let the little bit of betrayal from a long time ago dictate how you perceive things, and control how you act."

"You don't know me. What may seem as a little betrayal was like getting hit in the gut several times by a ram."

She raised her head up a little. "Do you wish to talk about it?"

"Talking just opens the whole bottle. It took me years, but I eventually learned how to bottle all my emotions into my head, and only let a few escape. If I were to talk about my past, there's a very good chance I could lose control over the bottle."

"Maybe you need to lose complete control once?"

DJ sighed. "You sound like my councilor. And I haven't seen her in years."

She frowned. "So, who would you talk to someone about this?"

"Other than the fact that it doesn't concern you, I only tell it to people I trust with everything I got. People that I know, if I took a bu... er... arrow for them, they would do the same for me."

"It's not healthy to keep those emotions inside you. They'll eventually get out, in a way you won't like."

Before she could respond, a beep filled the room. DJ removed his hands. "Thank you for coming to Canterlot Luxury Spa. I hope you enjoyed your stay."

He hid behind his curtain as Cadence rose. She started for him. "Maybe I could help you?"

DJ started tapping on the window furiously for Ms. Hooves. "Ma'am, please, do not come any closer!"

Before she could speak, he heard the doors open. "Princess! You are going to miss your soak!"

She paused for a second, then nodded. "Yes, you're right." DJ let out a sigh of relief.

_____________________________________________________________

*HOURS LATER*

Crack!

Luna's eyes slowly opened, and she immediately knew something was wrong. She was not woken by her sister, nor guard. But something different. So...

Crack!

Luna rolled out of the bed. Whatever is making that noise, disrupted my sleep. And nopo...

Crack!

...ny disturbs my sleep! She walked over to the balcony, looking for the source of the noise. "Show yourself!" She screamed. At that time, a small white plate soared through the air. Luna tilted her head, then, the plate exploded.

Crack!

Luna looked down, but the balcony was blocking her view of whatever was throwing the plates. She slowly took a trick she learned, and formed into a shadow, crawling on the walls, to the next balcony. Nothing...

Crack! Crack!

Luna knew exactly where the noise was coming from, and quickly made her way to the balcony in question. She heard a voice. A very, very, sad voice. "This is bullshit..." Soft clicks came from the same spot. "How the fuck would she understand? She doesn't know me!" Four more plates were launched through the air.

Crack! Click. Click. Crack! Click. Click. Crack! Click. Click. Crack! Click. Click.

Every plate was shattered. There was a loud sigh. "I just want to go home..."

Luna morphed back into herself, standing behind the distraught human. "DJ, are you alright?"

He kicked the empty shells on the ground. "Why the fuck did she have to bring back memories?" He looked to Luna. "Why wouldn't she just shut up?"

"I don't understand?"

DJ looked down. "Cadence brought up some old memories, things that I have tried to forget. And thought I succeeded at." He shrugged. "While my life I... was, pretty damn great, I had to work through tough times. Well... tough at the time."

Luna blinked. "Do you wish to talk about it?"

He frowned. "Dammit, no!" He stood up. "I don't want to share my life story with some horse that pulled me from my home!"

She frowned in return. "I saved your life!"

"Really, you saved my life?" DJ put a shell in the shotgun. "You are a princess, correct?"

"Well, yes..."

"And you don't want your kingdom or anything in it to suffer, right?"

"Of course not!"

DJ placed the shotgun on Luna's back, placing the barrel to his head. "Then please, put a wounded animal out of its misery! Send me to eternal rest!"

Luna was in shock. "Kill you?"

His eyes started to water. "I hate it here. Everything here hates me. Just do both a favor and pull the damned trigger!"

Luna was taken back. "I... I can't!"

DJ looked up. "Why not? You've killed ponies before!"

Her eyes filled with rage. "That wasn't me!"

"Oh yes it fucking was! You were just too jealous that your older sister got the attention!" DJ pulled the barrel more to the center of his head. It was working. He wanted her to get pissed, and pull the trigger.

"It was an evil spirit, that took control of my mind and body! It! Was! Not! Me!"

"Hundreds if not thousands dead, never to see their fami..."

There was a knock on the door. "DJ! That's enough!" The white monarch then threw open the door.

DJ collapsed to the ground. Not in fear. Not in sorrow. But defeat. He knew there was no way he could win now. No way that he could end the nightmare. No way. He felt a hoof on his shoulder. "There, th-"

"Don't. Fucking. Touch. Me." He said through grinding teeth.

"Oh... um... I'm sorry... I uhh..."

Celestia took the weapon from Luna, laying it on the floor, away from DJ. "Is everything alright?"

Luna was just realizing what was happening. "He tried to persuade me... and it was working!" She looked to the sobbing human. "But... why?"

Celestia looked at the human. "DJ... speak with us..."

He looked up. "Tell me. Tell me you are here to tell me you have a way to get me back. A way for me to see my home. To get out of this God forsaken land!"

Celestia looked at her sister. "Well, I felt my sister in distress, information about your return, and somepo-"

DJ's eyes lit up. "Information? You found a way!" He jumped up, tears streaming down his face as he wrapped the sun goddess in a bone crushing hug. "I get to go home! I get to fucking go home!"

Celestia lost her composure. She couldn't keep him in false hope. A tear fell down her face, already knowing how it would come to him. What it would do to him. "DJ..."

"Corben! Tyler! Kendrick! Matt! Sean! Shaw! Brett! Blake! Brandon! AJ! Scotty! Even Ms. Caddel! I get to see them all again!"

Celestia pushed DJ away, tears of joy now running down his face, as well as a smile from ear to ear. "DJ... I came here with Fluttershy." She motioned to the yellow pegasus. "She felt as though you needed a friend. Somepony you could trust."

"I don't give a fuck! I ge..."

"You can't go home." Celestia said.

DJ laughed a little. "Good one. That's real good." He ran over, grabbing all the clothes from the floor, throwing them into his blue bag, stringing his pads together.

Celestia motioned for Fluttershy, who slowly flew up to DJ. "Umm... DJ?"

His gaze met hers, denial hinting in his eyes. "Yeah, what's up?"

"Ummm... you ah... Princess Celestia tried very hard... but.. she..."

"She found a way to get me back home! I know! It's fucking awesome!" He pulled his helmet up to his face. "I wonder if I can steal you with mt jersey?"

"Princess Celestia um... couldn't get... couldn't get you a way home......."

DJ just laughed more, this time in sarcasm. He put his helmet on the ground. "Damn..."

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Wh..."

He kicked his pads across the room. "FUCKING DAMN!"

Luna spoke up. "DJ, calm down."

He grabbed the shotgun from the ground, popping in another fresh shell. "I know this is a dream now. This is all a dream! That's all this is! A nightmare!" He put the shotgun in his mouth.

Celestia's eyes widened, and she quickly pulled the weapon from his grasp. "Calm down, please."

DJ was filled with emotions. Pain, hate, defeat, and loss of hope. But the biggest, was one that he tried so hard to push away, tried to hide, the main reason he wanted to go home. Fear. "You fucking bitch! I ou..."

Fluttershy flew in front of DJ, her eyes fixing into his. He stalled. "Now you listen here mister..."

"Yes ma'am."

"Princess Celestia tried hard! She tried everything she could to find you a way home. You owe her an apology."

"But..."

"No buts, say you're sorry."

DJ never left her gaze. "I am sorry."

"For?"

The veins in DJ's neck and head started to bulge. "What the hell I...." his eyes got wide. "The Stare..."

"What are you sorry for?"

"I don't know." He said, being completely honest. He didn't know what he was sorry for. He was just acting how he knew.

"For saying rude words to the Princess?"

He slowly nodded. "I am sorry for using rude words."

Fluttershy gave a quick nod. "Good." Her eyes left his, and he fell to the ground, sweat formed around his forehead.

"Never... Again..." He looked back up at the Princess. "Please... tell me it was a lie..."

Celestia sighed. "I searched through all our archives, reading the most ancient of tomes, even attempting to reverse the portal that brought you here. But, I could not find anything that would work. The closest that we came, was a portal, so unstable and violent, we can't see through the other side. We do not know what is happening on the other end. For all we know, we could be dumping you into the void of space."

"It would still be better than this hell hole."

Luna was now angry. "What is wrong with our land? Why must you always degrade out peaceful and harmonic nation? Insult me and my sister? Verbally assault the ponies around you! If anything, you are not from another planet, but from the deepest pit in Taurus! A demon walking among us!"

"Luna!" Celestia snapped. "We have both seen demons with our own eyes, we know well enough that he is not what you accuse him to be."

"Demons have to specific form! They change! They are like the changelings, but much worse!"

DJ glanced at Fluttershy while the sisters got into an argument over what a demon really looked like. "Hey, you. You hate to see animals su..."

"DJ, Fluttershy will not kill you." Celestia said, looking at him, just winning the argument with her sister.

"Then what am I going to do!" He threw his hands in the air. "You're announcing I exist tomorrow, and you haven't even told me how."

Celestia thought for a second. How was she going to introduce him? How would she introduce a new being into her world? When her gaze caught sight of a rectangle on the bed, she got an idea. "What about a performance?"

"A play? Are you fucking serious?" He rubbed his head. "I just get told that I can't go home, by risk of blowing up in a vacuum, so I have to be Romeo."

"No, not a play." She levitated the rectangle. "A concert, if you will."

He grabbed his phone from the air. "You couldn't possibly get what I want. And besides, why should I?"

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Because I am what is protecting you from the public?"

He paused for a second. "Still doesn't answer the equipment problem." He thought for a second. "Wait a minute, I was just livid with you not but a minute ago! What the fuck hap..." his eyes met Fluttershy's. "Nevermind."

"Do not worry about that. Just pick two or three of your songs, and we will take care of the rest."

DJ smiled like a maniac. "Oh I think I know a song you'll love ."

"Oh? What's it called?"

"Oh, one's by a guy named Bob. Another is from a nice man named Marshall. I think the third will be quite the surprise though."

__________________________

Edited by Sanity

Apologies on thin ice

"Hahahaha! I'm just kiddin' ladies, you know I love you!" And with that, DJ was gone with a silent pop. To say the ponies in the room were confused was an understatement.

Scarred for life is a much better one.

Pinkie's hair was deflated. Rainbow Dash and Applejack both wore faces rhat spelled out hatred, distrust, and a want to buck the living shit out of the human. Rarity fainted after the first act. Twilight' jaw was laying on the floor. Celestia was frowning, mentally cursing herself for not checking what songs would be performed.

Luna and Fluttershy wore similar expressions. Tears running down the sides of their faces. A similar thought going through their head. 'Why?' What was different, however, was how they reacted. Fluttershy would start bawling, wrapping into a ball while her friends would try and calm her down. They would rub their hooves on her back, tell her it was alright, throw empty threats about the human, and would be by her side.

But Luna, would lay in her room, tears staining the dark blue sheets. Alone. Her sister would be dealing with the rebelious human. Twilight would be with Fluttershy. Cadence would be with Shining. And Blueblood would be complaining with his 'friends' about the monster. She would be all alone to sulk.

"Princess..... what was that?" Twilight asked, shaking herself back into reality.

Princess Celestia shook her head. "I don't believe DJ was thinking logically. I will find the purpose behind that display."

As she stood, teleporting to DJ's room, the ponies slowly left the large room. Fist the nobles, then the servents, the musicians, the six, and then Discord.

Luna sat in silence before her horn ignited, sending her to her room. Laying on the bed, she let all the emotions flow.

___________________

"What was the reasoning behind that?" Celestia asked as DJ opened the door to his room.

"Fear is a powerful tool, if I can make everypony here scared for their life when I walk by, then I can guarantee my own safety." He swung the door open, trying to slam it on the monarch, buy failed when magic stopped the rapidly accelerating door.

"DJ... I can't say I understand, and I can't say I know you on a personal level, but I know this isn't you."

DJ went to say something, but stopped himself. He looked at the ground, kicking some of his clothes over to his bags. "I'm taking a shower." He shed his clothes, all but shorts, and closed the bathroom door. Celestia walked over to it as the water started up.

"You are much more kind than what you are showing. Why are you acting like this?"

"Oh, I don't know, because I hate it here maybe?"

Celestia lowered her head. "Be that as it may, you are here to stay. I can't change that, and neither can you. And we both know it. You might as well try and cope with it. Everypony now knows you are here, so I can't keep you in the castle and the spa. You can leave whenever you want. But, you have nowhere to go..." A thought, popped into her head, but was cut off before she could speak it.

"Don't you fucking dare send me to learn about the magic of friendship with the elements. I had plenty back home."

Celestia frowned. "How did you..."

"Ring won't come off, stuck for half an hour. I am still learning everything about it.... so that's why you like bananas..."

Celestia shook her head. "Regardless of wether or not you had friends back home, you need friends here. And from what I can tell, you really scared Luna." The only sound was the water running through the pipes and hitting the floor. "She was trying to be your friend."

"Yeah..."

"I think there is still a chance to regain your relationship with her, even make one with Twilight and her friends."

"I'll mend Luna's, but not touching the elements." There was more silence.

"You really scared Fluttershy... she's in her room with her friends crying, they are trying to calm her down."

"Good, dumb whore shouldn't have used her stare on me... wait a second..." a black aura of light came from the backside of the door, along with a loud gasp. The water was shut off, and before Celestia could react, a naked, soaked, DJ burst through the doors. "I'm comin' baby!"

Celestia teleported in front of DJ. "Where are you going?"

"Listen, unless you want some Arabian goggles, I suggest that you move, I have magic telekenisis shit now! I can fix Lil' Red!" DJ puahed her out of the way, continuing his decent to where his S10 was being held. Celestia followed close.

"And how do you plan on getting the scientists to leave it alone long enough for you to fix it?"

"I have a plan, just leave me be!" DJ ran faster, as Celestia followed him, until DJ threw open the doors, all the scientists continued to prod at the machine. "Hey!" He screamed. All the scientists turned to him. He grabbed the base of his member, rotating it in a circular motion. "Get to the choppa!" He screamed in a thick accent, causing everypony, even Celestia, yo wince.

"What are you doing?" She asked, trying to keep her eyes locked on his own eyes. It was like a train wreck, you don't want to look, but can't look away.

"Get out!" He yelled, swirling the member, almost hitting a scientist in the head. They complied rather quick. DJ smiled. "Perfect." He snapped his fingers, and he was fully clothed. "I'm gonna miss this..." he turned to the truck. "Alright, what've we got here..."

Celestia peered over his shoulder, watching him as he bent the metal back into place with his black magic. He wore a smile she had never seen. He looked like a foal, who just learned he could get whatever he wanted from the candy shop. Celestia couldn't help herself, she smiled too. So, this is what it takes to get him in a good mood?

"Son of a bitch!" He screamed. Or not...

"What is it?" She asked.

DJ went to his knees, trying to pick something up from the ground. "No! I was so close! Why now!?"

"What?"

DJ moved over, pointing to a pile of ash on the ground. "Fuckin' ring broke on me, and I was so close to gettin' her fixed!"

Celestia moved next to him. "Maybe I could help you?"

DJ shook his head. "I know this truck inside and out. I could tear it down and put it back together again, in perfect shape. I don't want anyone that doesn't know what they're doing touching her.' He let out a sigh. "Sorry, Red. I tried." He tapped the metal machine with his hand.

"I believe now would be a good time to apologize to Luna?" She suggested.

He shrugged. "Might as well. I have a feeling if I don't, I won't get any sleep at night." He stood up, cracking every bone on his way.

"That can't be healthy..."

He smiled. "Really? Listen to this shit." He quickly dropped into a squat position, and stood up. A grinding noise filling the air. "I have bad knees, they don't hurt, but I'm surprised I haven't had to get them fixed."

Before Celestia could speak, another deity entered the room. "Can I borrow him? Thanks!" Discord grabbed DJ, and teleported away.

________________________

DJ fell to the floor of a dark room, he quickly stood up, looking at his surroundings. A voice rang out. "We had a deal!"

"Have a deal, dumbass." DJ replied flatly.

"You were to make Celestia look like a fool! Now you don't have the ring!"

DJ shifted his weight to his hip. "When did I agree to prankin' her while I had the ring? I just said I'd prank her."

Silence was all that was heard. "How do you plan on pranking her without magic?"

DJ just laughed. "Oh God, you really don't know me." DJ started walking in a random direction. "Although, I have to say, it was pretty badass having that much power. And I don't think I'll be bothered much either."

"Why shouldn't I just scare you then? Right here and now for not living up to your end of the deal?"

"Nothing to fear but fear itself." He stopped and looked around. "Can I get back to Celestia now? We were kinda talking about something important."

"Give me a reason why..."

"I have alien knowledge. Twilight and Luna would kill you if I went missing."

"Fair enough." A bright light flashed, leaving DJ to cover his eyes, when he came to his senses, Celestia just had a quizzical look on her face.

"What was that about?"

DJ waved his hand at her. "Nothin'. So, we were apologizing to Luna?"

"You were about to, yes." She opened the door, motioning out.

He sighed. "What do I say? I mean, I probably scared the shit out of her."

Celestia slightly tilted her head. "Surely you've had to mend a relationship before?"

He shook his head. "Nope. Neva."

"No friendships were broken?"

"Negative."

"No mare troubles?"

He kinda laughed. "Negative." He kinda smiled, thinking back to home. "There were a couple things I could rely on to.always be there for me. My mama, my truck... and I don't even have football to fall back on."

She eyed him. "Your football is really that important to you, isn't it?"

He nodded. "Ever since I started, I felt like it was where I belonged. Like it was my calling." He sighed. "The pads on your shoulders, gurtle hugging your legs tight, the adrenaline pumping through your veins. You rely on your brothers to help you, and they rely on you to help them." He looked over at the monarch. "It's a mutual understanding. If a running back gets mouthy with the linemen, all they have to do is sit on their ass, and it's a busted play, the back gets rocked, and the playing field is even again. But I just feel like, if I had the chance, I could do so much more. It Reilly is my talent."

"So your cutie mark?"

"We already went over this, Celestia. Humans don't get cutie marks."

"But you've never explained the marking on your shoulder?"

DJ rolled up his sleeve. "It's Chinese, for power. Got it in Texas, we had some good friends down there."

She shook her head. "You tell me of all these rules, yet, you've broken every one of them."

He smiled. "In movies and music alone, I've got a couple thousand years in federal prison." They continued their walk in silence. DJ arguing with himself over how to apologize, and Celestia arguing with herself how to help the lonely human. She didn't have a solution when they reached Luna's room. "So, what do I say?" DJ asked, resting his hand on the handle.

"Just apologize for your actions."

DJ took in a deep breath, then slowly opened the door. "Luna?" He took a step in. "Luuuuunaaaaaa?" He turned to Celestia. "She's asleep..." He walked over to her bed. "Cried herself to sleep..." Celestia saw emotional pain grip DJ. And for DJ, it felt like someone just crushed every bit of faith and hope in himself into the dirt. No... No! Dammit no! I said I would never do this! Never have another in emotional pain! Never cry themselves to sleep over my actions! God fucking dammit! He groaned and grabbed his head. Way to go, asshole, the only one in this place you can stand and now you done gone and fucked her over! You fucking hypocrite!

"DJ, are you alright?" Celestia asked, she could see a glint in DJ's eye. A tear, formed from hatred. Hatred for one's self.

DJ looked at Celestia. "I'll talk to her later." DJ started out of the room. "Don't want to wake her up." He said in a flat voice. And smartass hints in it were gone. Every bit of emotion was washed away from it. It was like a machine was talking, programed lines and phrases.

"DJ...?"

As he walked out of the room, he looked over his shoulder. "Never again...." he said softly. He grabbed something from around his neck, a silver chain, and cross. Celestia had seen it but twice, and when asked about it, DJ would quickly change the subject. He looked at the jewelry in diguist, before giving a hard yank. He tossed the item on the ground, and walked out of the room. Celestia picked up the necklace from the ground.

"I think that there's more he's not telling us..." She said to herself as she observed the necklace. 'R&D' engraved on the back. "Much more."

Reversed feelings

DJ slammed the door to his room behind him, walking straight towards his dresser. They don't need to know... He grabbed his black book, flipping the thin pages at random, dropping his finger on a random verse, and hoping it would help. It had in the past, so it shouldn't be any different now. He slammed his finger onto the page, but didn't look down. Where am I going to find anything that relates to me in this position? On another fucking planet, with magic and talking horses, away from my family, away from everything I love. Everything here hates me, and I caused it. What could possibly relate to me in this book?.DJ looked down and moved his finger.

He almost collapsed at the verse as he read it aloud. "Jesus wept."

"DJ...?" A voice from the other side of the door called. DJ quickly composed himself, closing the book and throwing it on his bed.

"DJ's not in at the moment, feel free to leave a message after the tone."

"You left something back in Luna's room... Would you like to explain what it is?"

DJ's hand went to his throat. "No... take it..." He looked over at his bags. "As a matter of fact..." He stood up, getting all of his things together. Ring, pads, watch, books, notes, everything. He stuffed them all in the bags, and opened the door. "Take it all. If I can't go home, I don't want memories plaguing my mind."

Celestia used her magic to move all the things back into the room. "We learn from our mistakes, and it is best to keep the good times with us. Keep your items."

DJ sighed. "Listen, I appreciate what you're trying to do." He grabbed his class ring. "But when you look at this ring, you see metal and a gem. Me? I see Wil. I see nationals. I see every student at Noble Highschool. I see a torn hip, a broken back, making girls laugh so hard they almost piss themselves. And I see Ry..." He stopped himself. "I just see memories, things I will NEVER be able to repeat."

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Who?"

DJ turned away. "Who what?"

"You were about to say the name of somepony." She started walking towards DJ. "What was the name?" When DJ didn't answer, she brought out the necklace. "There's an engraving on the back."

"R&D, I know."

Celestia just examined the letters closer. "It would be simple to guess the 'D' represents you. But this 'R...'" She looked at DJ. "This 'R' is giving me troubles."

DJ waved his hand. "Just a letter, nothing important." He replied, trying so hard to keep his head at a stable level.

Celestia tucked the necklace under her wing. "Very well. I will see you in the morning then, DJ. Luna will be there for breakfast, waiting for your apology, and my student with her friend to give you theirs."

DJ gave a small grunt of annoyance. "Not going to accept 'em. Stupid bitches."

Celestia just walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. She knew just the pony to help her with this mystery. It was obvious DJ cares very much for this 'R.' It is obviously for a name, as the 'D' is for DJ. But how could she possibly learn what the 'R' stood for without learning from DJ directly?

From the necklace itself.

____________________________

*The next morning*

DJ stirred in his bed, before he finally realized he was awake. He slowly opened his eyes, groaning as the light reached into the room. He grabbed his phone from the nightstand.

"I'm doing this a little earlier than usual. This is audio log... fuck I don't even know. Hell, I don't even know what day it is." He stood up from the bed, the phone still recording his voice. "I'd say the concert was both a success and a failure. I have implanted an idea into most of the ponies heads, almost like Inception, and it will grow. They will become terrified of me. The public will be the safest place for me." He kinda chuckled. "Like Zecora... I know exactly how she feels now. Then again... I always have..." He shook himself into reality. "But, I may have broken my friendship with Luna, and tossed away my necklace in the process... I almost never take it off... and I threw it away..." he let out a sigh as he paused the recording. When he resumed, he wasn't talking to the phone, but himself.

"I should have just gone to that one party. Would was this worth a headache and ass chewing? If I would have just turned right..." He stopped the recording, throwing the phone onto the bed. There was a knock on the door. "Jim's whore house. You got the dough, we got the ho." DJ said to the pony on the other side of the door.

"Erm... I... this is DJ's room? Who are you!" A male voice called from the other side of the door. DJ sighed as he pulled on his socks and shoes, making his way to the door.

He opened it rather quick. "Let's get this over with." He said. He looked down at the guard. "What's up? I don't need an escort."

The guard shook his head. "I was just told to inform you breakfast is in half an hour."

DJ nodded. "Right, I'll be there." He shut the door, and went over to his dresser. He put on his ring and other items, then went to the bathroom. He started washing his face off, getting all the stuff out of his eyes. He looked up into the mirror. He stared into his own eyes. So this is what they see... He reached out, placing his hand on the mirror. What am I doing? Why am I doing this? This isn't me... I'm not a monster... He looked down at his hands. "Am I?"

He let out a long sigh. "Maybe I should apologize to all of 'em." He started to dry his hands, his mind still racing of what he needed to do. Did he really want them all to tremble when he walked in a room? Did he want them all to scream when he walked by? He loved to see people scared... on Halloween. When he would scare them, get the adrenaline, then they would all laugh about it. This was different. Much different.

He decided he should go ahead and head for the dining room, wouldn't want to keep them waiting. He grabbed his headphones, pressed shuffle, and started walking towards breakfast. 'Breakdown' playing in his ears.

________________________________

Celestia rapped her hoof on the larger set of doors. She had the necklace tucked under her wing. When the door opened, she greeted the pink alicorn with a warm smile. "Goodmorning, Cadence. How did you sleep?"

Cadence returned the smile. "Very good, um, can I ask what you're doing here?"

Celestia nodded. "Follow me." The two alicorns started walking down the long hallway. "As you know, DJ is not like anypony else. And it has been bothering me as to why. It is obvious he wishes to return home, but I always had a feeling there was more than just that."

Cadence looked at Celestia. "What are you saying?"

Celestia brought out the necklace. "Last night, he tore this off his neck. There is an engraving on the back. 'R&D.' And I think that the 'R' is the real reason behind his behavior." She looked at the pink alicorn. "This is where I need your help."

"How?"

Celestia walked into a large room, Cadence followed behind. "I am going to take the reflections from the necklace, the cross in particular. They will be displayed all through the room. It's obvious that there will be a massive amount. I need you to use your magic, and find the events that pertain to love."

Cadence looked around. "So cover up anything that doesn't have to do with it?"

Celestia nodded. "Correct." She raised the necklace up. "Are you ready?" Cadence gave a small nod. Celestia's horn ignited, the necklace started to glow, then, in a bright flash, the room was filled with moving pictures. Some had multiple people, some just a few, some were covered by his shirt. Cadence ignited her horn. Almost all the images started to go black, leaving but a few choice ones. Celestia summoned a piece of paper, and moved the images from the walls onto the paper.

Their horns started to dim, and their task was accomplished. Celestia levitated the papers to her, placing the necklace under her wing at the same time. She brought up the clearest picture. And suddenly, everything made sense. Why he wanted to go home so bad. Why he hated everything in the world. It was because while he was there.

She wasn't.

_______________________

DJ sat at the table, waiting for somepony to enter. He was both relieved and overwhelmed with stress whenever Luna entered. "Luna..." He stood up, walking towards the alicorn. "Last night... I was unaware of what I was doing. My action..."

Luna smiled. "It is alright. I accept your apology."

DJ let out a long breath of air. "Thanks. I'm just... I'm sorry that I sc..."

Blueblood entered the room. "Where is au..."

DJ pointed his finger at the prince. "No one gives a fuck!" And with that, Blueblood left the room, uttering some rather vulgar words.

DJ started laughing, when Celestia, Cadence, Armor, and the six came in. The only ponies not shooting daggers with theor eyes were the two princesses. DJ tipped his invisible hat. "Howdy doodly."

Celestia smiled. "I am doing very well." She brought out a few of the newly developed pictures. "And I think today may be a very good day for you."

DJ raised an eyebrow. "Uhh... how?"

Celestia put one of the photos face down in his hands. "This."

DJ looked at it in curiousity, before turning it over. His expression remained the same. "Where did you get this..."

Celestia smiled. "We wante..."

DJ threw the picture down. "I ASKED WHERE YOU GOT IT! NOT WHY!" He screamed. He turned away from the ponies, starting to walk out of the room. "I ask you to leave one thing. One fucking thing! I try yo hint I don't want to talk about it, and what do you do? You fucking find a picture!" He left through the kitchen, slamming the door behind him.

Twilight walked over, picking up the picture. "What is the deal with this picture?" She studied it, remembering every detail.

Cadence looked at Celestia. "I thought you said it would help?"

Celestia frowned. "So did I..."

As the ponies discussed what just happened, an idea was brewing in Cadence's head. A plan that looks amazing on paper, but when put into action...

Is a horrible idea.

Duck, duck, PONY!

As DJ made his way through the kitchen, his face was changing expressions constantly. From pain, to anger. Confusion, to hate. Love, to annoyance. He was riding an emotional rollercoaster by himself, and it was traveling at the speed of light. Unconsciously, his hand reached out, grabbing a loaf of bread, not just a slice, the whole loaf. A loaf that was so fresh, he only realized it was in his hands when he started to feel immense pain from his fingers. That's what snapped him back into reality of where he was. His mind wouldn't leave the subject of how they even managed to get a picture. Was Celestia in hid head? Was he always watched, no matter how secluded he was? He eventually made his way out of the kitchen, guards patrolling the halls.

They had since got used to his being in the castle, but they never let their guard down. He was a hostile alien, and even if Celestia granted him citizenship for his stay, they treated him like a convict, from a low security prison. They always gripped their spears tighter, and got ready to ignite their horns when he walked by. He wasn't friendly to them, why should they be to him? He would always poke fun at them, calling them names, asking about the changeling invasion, and what not.

DJ ran his fingers through his hair as he took in a deep breath. Just breathe, bro. You'll be fine, just calm down. There has to be an explanation behind it. He looked around, he knew where he was at. His truck wasn't far from there. He headed towards the destroyed vehicle. He would always be able to talk to the truck, it was his best friend. Sure, he had Corb and Tyler and all them, but they wouldn't always agree with DJ's ideas. Lil' Red did. Lil' Red listened to everything he had to say, and didn't question a single word. She didn't need to. Red was just always there when he needed her.

DJ zoned out, going into his own little world as he worked his way to his truck. He was thinking about Noble. What were his friends doing? Had they got the rings yet? Were they still looking for him. Did they even start looking for him? But the main question he had; did she find someone else?

He snapped back into reality when he almost ran into the door to the vehicle. He opened the door and, surprise surprise, scientists still pryed the vehicle apart with their eyes. They weren't allowed to move ANYTHING without DJ's say so. DJ looked over at the table full of items. One item in particular caught his attention. He walked over, grabbing the green call. He had gotten it at the same time he got his first gun. It was in the safe now, but DJ never left without the duck call. He pressed it to his lips, emitting a sound that turned all the scientist's heads.

"Was that, that?" One asked, pointing to the call.

DJ nodded. "Yeah, duck call. Greatest thing ever." He said with a smile. He walked over to his truck, sitting on the down tailgate. "Well, would be even better if I could actually use it."

A different scientist came to DJ. "You like to watch ducks?"

DJ shrugged. "More or less."

He waved at hoof at DJ. "There's a pond, just outside Canterlot, tons of ducks. I go there myself, actually." He said with a smile, wanting the alien's approval.He received a smile and nod.

DJ stood up, making his way for the door. "I've got an idea..." he said to himself. He placed the call in his pocket. When he entered the hallway, he cupped his hands around his mouth, and screamed. "Discord's a fuckin' bitch!" And he waited.

Not very long though, as the deity appeared within seconds. "Who's insulting me? I w..."

"Shutup, bitch. I need you to get something for me." DJ said, shifting his weight. "Celestia has my shotgun, I need it back, and to be teleported to the pond outside Canterlot."

Discord was dumbstruck. He was just verbally insulted by a mortal.... an alien mortal! He started laughing. "And what makes you think I'll do all that?" He asked between breaths.

DJ took out his phone, opening the photo gallery. "Because." He tossed the phone. "I always fulfill my end of the bargain."

He grabbed the phone from the air, looking down, he saw a picture, a picture he never expected to see in his life. Celestia laying in her bed, blankets on the floor. And condoms everywhere.

With a mayo everywhere.

Discord looked at DJ. "How did you...?"

He smiled. "We were able to move a couple hundred pound FUCKING BEAR into a small office. Don't question what I can and can't do in the prank department. So, shotgun and teleport?" He grabbed the phone from Discord, immediatley locking it.

Discord smiled back. "Of course."

________________________________________________

Twilight studied the picture she had found in the dinning room. The human in the picture, and all her features. She had blue eyes, like DJ's, only with a darker shade, not the ice that was concealed inside his. Not the pain and hate hidden inside. Hers contained life and joy. Her hair was blonde, and in a style similar to Applejack's. She was much smaller then DJ in every area. She was shorter, looked like she weighed fifty kilos less, she wasn't near as wide, and while she did have muscle, it didn't compare to DJ's at all. But it was there.

The more she studied the features, the more she understood why he acted the way he did. She was his everything. And he was missing it. By why did he react the way he did when Princess Celestia tried to give it to him? His anger, where did it come from? Why wasn't he greatful that he had the picture? Something tangible to remember her with.

That's when Twilight facehoofed. "Of course! This isn't tangible, this is a piece of paper! He can't interact with what's on it." Twilight turned around when she heard hooves nearing her. A smile grew on her face when she saw her five friends. She concentrated a little, and the picture was teleported to her room. "Hey girls!"

Fluttershy was the one to speak. "We were going down to watch some of the birds!"

Twilight raised an eyebrow. "I th..."

Pinkie started jumping up and down. "Nope! We are taking a chariot to the pond just over there!" She pointed at a window, revealing a rather large pond.

Twilight smiled. "Oh, I know that pond! Me and Shining Armor used to go there all the time when I was a foal!"

Rainbow Dash started pushing the group. "Then let's go! I need to stretch my wings!"

When they reached the chariot, Twilight was no longer thinking of the human. Instead, she was just thinking of her friends. Rainbow Dash and Applejack would undoubtedly find some kind of competition between them, Pinkie would be doing cannon balls in the pond, Fluttershy and Rarity would have binoculars as be watching all the birds, or ducks, that came near. And Twilight? She would embrace her memories, all the memories with her brother. All the good times they had chasing each other. Him throwing her into the water with his magic, her getting angry, but only for a few seconds before the two would burst into laughter.

One of the reasons she loved the pond, how quiet it was. The only noises that could be heard was the quaks of ducks, chirps of birds, and the water waving onto the bank. All Twilight could do was smile.

The chariot set down quite a distance away from the pond, upon request from a yellow pegasus not to scare any of the birds. Rainbow Dash immediatley soared straight into the sky, letting her wings completely extend. She was free outside, no walls and ceiling to hold her back. Twilight just continued to smile at her friends, but what else could she do? She was having a relaxing afternoon with her best friends in the world! Why wouldn't she smile? The whole grouo stopped in their tracks when they were close to the pond. Fluttershy was almost squeeling in exitement.

"Oh, my! I've never seen so many at once!" She said, taking out her binoculars. She gasped when the light would reflect off the duck's green head, making it look like a dark emrald.

"It's beautiful!" Rarity said as she looked down her binoculars. All the ponies had the same responce, except Pinkie.

Who was having a staring contest with a bush.

They got even closer, the sounds the ducks made were magnificent. Twilight observed the ducks, this was the first time she had seen so many at the pond at once. But before she could really take the time to appreciate it, she over examined the pond, and realized one of the ducks, was in the bush Pinkie was having a staring contest with.

As Twilight turned her attention there, so did all the other ponies. They started to slowly move towards the bush to investigate, their curiosity getting the better of them. When they were but two yards away, three sticks flew from the bush, impacting the water. The ducks took to the air at the sudden action. When the ponies looked back to the bush from the sticks, fear grasped their very souls. A large creature, standing on it's hind legs, covered completely in leaves and grass rose up. He put a large stick into the crook of his shoulder. Twilight recognized the stick.

From the human's room.

*CRACK* The stick had a massive fireball on the end, the girls covered their ears, and looked around. What they saw, was murder. A duck was now falling from the sky, in random patterns. Fluttershy reacted naturally, and took off after the bird. She reached it before it hit the ground. When she looked at the duck, it had multiple spots where it was bleeding. A lot. It was dead.

The human brought the weapon down. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Six sets of very very angry eyes landed on him. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He said, jumping ou t of the bushes, running from the ponies. They started in pursuit of the fleeing murderer. DJ only knew one thing he could do. "Discord's a pussy bitch!"

The deity rose from the ground, but before he could say anything, DJ grabbed his horns, jerking them to the side. It was a last second idea, and he hoped it worked. Discord started to say something, but the yanking motion caused his magic to fire up. Teleporting them away.

Across the pond. DJ looked across, the ponies looking back. He turned to Discord. "Get me out!"

Discord rubbed his horns. "Of course!" He snapped his fingers, and they teleported once again. Discord to where he was before, and DJ into a castle dumpster.

He shrugged. "Fair enough, clever bastard."

The ponies all made their way to Fluttershy, who was crying over the duck's corpse. The all wrapped her in a warn hug. Twilight looked at the duck. Why would he do this? What did the duck do? How could that weapon do this? She really didn't have any answers. But then again, no horror story had an answer. The hero in the story always questions 'why?' But in reality, there isn't an answer. It's that one question that keeps the hero going though. But Twilight started to think harder. But who's the villain?

Wake up and smell the magic

DJ sat with his head between his hands, waiting for his ass chewing. He had yet to shower, due to royal guards taking him into custody almost immediately. The ponies had taken away another of his stress relievers. Hunting was one of his favorite passtimes. His favorite was deer, the woods were always calm right before he would pull the trigger. He let out a lonh sigh. I'm losing it. Fuckin' ponies, I wasn't just doing it for sport! I was going to eat it, that was the whole point. He smiled a little. Well, there went any chance at getting the gun back, that's for sure. He looked around the cell, it was the same one as when he first woke. He looked at the carving, the plays engraved on the walls. Each one held a specific memory.

Celestia entered the room, holding his shotgun, the deceased duck, and a brown bag. "Would you care to explain yourself?"

DJ let out a long sigh. "Listen, you see these?" He pointed to his canines. "These mean I eat meat, and dammit, I haven't had any for almost a month! I was hungry!"

Celestia just nodded a little. "Be that as it may, you still commited a very violent act." She placed the duck on the floor. "While no, they are not, per say, intelligent, they still interact with everything around them. This duck, still had a family."

DJ let out a grunt. "You wouldn't understand."

She raised an eyebrow. "Understand what?"

DJ looked straight into her eyes. "I've always felt alone my whole life, for as long as I can remember. I don't know if I like it... or I'm just used to it, but I do know this: Being lonely does things to you, and feeling shitty and bitter and angry all the time just... eats away at you."

Celestia just blinked. "You're lonely?"

He laughed a little. "Only one person has ever understood me, knew how I ticked, knew how the cogs in my head would turn, knew my deepest darkest secrets." He smiled. "And you already know who it is, without even having to ask."

"The female, from the picture?"

His smile remained. "You got it."

She shook her head. "Be that as it may, I am still required to give you a form of punishment."

DJ cringed. "Make it quick." He said.

Celestia shook her head, her horn slowly starting to glow. "I'm sorry, but it won't be quick." A smile spread across her face, DJ didn't see it though. It was a smile of victory, as if she had won. She set the bag on the floor, pulling out its contents.

Bit by bit, the material was torn, and thrown on the ground. DJ kept his eyes shut, not wanting to see his punishment, the sounds and feeling were enough. It wasn't going to cause him any physical pain, but the mere action was torturing him in every way. The way the feathers ruffled against his leg, he was about to vomit. He had never been in this position before, sure, he had thought about it, heard the enjoyment people gained, but it wasn't him. He didn't do this. He had never wanted to do this.

He could almost smell the satisfaction coming from the godess. Could almost touch the awkwardness in the air. Almost see all the tension. He had tried to resist, to push away, but magic is much stronger than physical strength. He was quickly convinced.

Did Celestia think this was a joke? This was her form of torture? Turning the hunter into the prey? Putting one who was on top of the world into the lowest position possible. It was simply impossible for him to comprehend what was happening. The sounds, the feelings, the smells, everything was alien to him. Humiliating. The words to describe it, there were none. His friends wouldn't believe it. His family would wonder what happened to the real DJ. And every hunter would spit at him.

DJ threw another piece of bread onto the ground, quaks filling his ears, the wind causing the smaller ducks to roll around, colliding with his legs. The smell of pond water without a pole was sickening to him. Hey, better than being a sex slave.

____________

Celestia gave a reasuring smile to Fluttershy. "It's alright, I'm sure that 'Jordan' is in a better place now." She gave a pat on her head.

Fluttershy sniffed a little. "Why would he do that?"

Celestia closed her eyes. "He is an omnivor, Fluttershy. It isn't healthy for him to leave meat behind him. Like the bears you care for."

She nodded. "I guess I understand."

Rainbow Dash and Applejack gave each other a quick nod, and stormed out of the, hilariously small, funeral. They were out for blood. "No one messes with Fluttershy like that!" Rainbow said, steam about to shoot out of her ears and nose.

Applejack nodded. "Mmmm hmmm!" Was all she replied. Her mind was elsewhere. While she wanted so bad to kick that monster's flank to the moon, she had seen the damage it could do. Rainbow Dash could clear the skies in ten seconds flat, the monster could put them six feet under in two.

"How fast do you think they were moving?" Rainbow Dash spoke up finally.

Applejack snapped back to the living. "Who?"

"Princess Celestia had said that it's weapon shot little metal balls, and that's what hit the duck." She shook her head. "And it was way faster than any magic I've ever seen!"

Applejack thought about it, she never even saw the little balls until Celestia had shown them how the, 'shells' she called them, worked. It just looked like an explosion from the 'gun.' "I haven't got a clue." She finally said.

The two furious ponies arrived at the pond, where they knew the monster human was. Rainbow Dash saw him first. "Hey, you!" She screamed, but didn't get a reply. He sat on a bench, almost too small for him, staring into the distance, mindlessly tearing off a piece of bread and throwing it either on the ground for the ducks, or water for fish.

Rainbow Dash popped her neck and wings, getting in a sprinter's position. In the blink of an eye, her wings were propelling her across the gap, straight for the monster. His lifeless gaze met the assaulting pony. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a yellow gem. He cracked it like a glowstick, and tossed it on the ground. A yellow bubblw formed around DJ. Rainbow Dash tried to stop, but was going way too fast. She ran face first into the shield.

"I'm not stupid..." He said, throwing in more bread.

Rainbow Dash rubbed her head. "Why don't you come out of your littlw magic and fight me!" She snarled.

DJ shrugged. "Because I'll lose." He said flatly. "You are being driven by hate. I can't top that. Not anymore." He sighed. "I'm burnt out."

Applejack started bucking the shield, leaving miniscule cracks. "Burnt out 'ah what?"

DJ shrugged again. "Hate. Anger. Pissed off-ness." He leaned back in the bench as the two ponies continued to attack the shield. "I'd advize you to stop..."

"Oh yeah!" *gasp* "Or what?" Rainbow Dash said. As her hoof made contact with the shield once again, electricity pulsated through the bubble, sending the two back several feet, before the predetermined magical properties teleported them to the throne room. DJ continued throwing bread, until the shield gave way.

_________________

He almost didn't notice the small family near the pond, they just appeared. Three children, and a mother. They all stayed on the other side of the pond, the mother pointing at the monster, getting a different reaction from each child. DJ snorted. Guess I deserve that... He looked down at his hands. Jesus Christ, how much bread did she give me? Three whole loaves remained to be thrown.

A squeeky voice caught his attention. "Hey..."

DJ turned a little, a bright pink pegasus with a green mane, no more then a few years old, blank flank, was staring at him. "Hmm?"

She fluttered her wings at a million miles an hour, flying up to the bench. "My mommy said you were a monster."

He grunted. "She's probably right." He sighed. "I don't know what I am any more."

She laughed. "You don't sound like a monster." He didn't reply. She scooted closer to him. "You alright, mister?"

"Not really, no." He said, throwing more bread into the pond. "I don't know what to do anymore. I made a mistake, and lost everything."

The child placed a hoof on his shoulder. "My mommy always tells me, that when you're down, or don't know what to do, we need to wake up, because just because we open our eyes in the morning, doesn't mean we really wake up."

DJ turned to the pony. Wake up... "Your mommy sounds very smart." He said with a smile. "What's your name?"

"Oh, I don't have a name yet." She said with a smile. DJ was about to say something, when she spoke. "Our mommy wants us to be the best we can, and take no short ways through. And a lot of ponies' names deal with their cutie marks, sooooo....."

"So for a challenge, no name until mark." DJ said, who got a nod for a reply. "That's pretty awesome, sounds like your mommy knows what's going on."

A new voice entered the conversation. "Yes, she does!" The mother said. "What did I just tell you?" She asked the nameless child.

"But, Mommy! He's really nice!" She pleaded.

"Yes, sure, come on kiddos, let's go home to your father." The family left DJ, the daughter waving before she was out of sight. DJ smiled a little, before a new thought entered his head. Wake up....

_______________

Ponyville Library

"Done, and, done!" Spike had placed the inks, papers, books, and everything else in their proper place, preparing for Twilight's return. He knew that Twilight would have him do it when she got back anyway, plus a gazillion chores, he should do it now and even get a nap in.

As he made his way to hid bed, a sound caught his attention. A very subtle *beep*. Spike swallowed. "Hello?" He called out. No reply. He started towards the source of the noise, growing increasingly louder and quicker. He eventually reached the door to Twilight's machines. He slowly opened the door.

"Who's there?" He called again. He walked into the room, a single machine roaring to life. A large paper falling from it. Spike grabbed it, reading it aloud. "Warning! Canterlot magic usage has spiked to dangerous levels. One source. Castle." He tried to comprehend what all the words meant. He shrugged, Twilight would be back tomorrow, and she could know what it means.

A burning sensation

DJ walked into the center of the field. Homecoming night was here, and the crowd was massive. They all got quiet as he prepared himself. "Bears!" He screamed.

"Backer!" They replied.

"What is your profession!?"

The crowd pumped their fists with each shout. "Aaa-ooo! Aaa-ooo! Aaa-ooo!"

DJ smiled as he jogged back to the sidelines to get the most recent armband. It was a small ritual a senior came up with a few years back, but DJ had taken it even farther. As he slid in the new numbers, something caught his eye. A group of freshman had taken their helmets off, and were sitting down on the bench, each had a bottle of water in their hands. He even thought he saw the straps from their shoulder pads. DJ walked toward the trio. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

They exchanged glances. "Uh, talking?" The middle one replied like a smartass.

DJ looked over his shoulder. "Alise! Bailey!" The two managers looked over their shoulders upon hearing their names. "Make sure these three don't get a drop until they touch the field." He turned back to the players. "Get up."

"Why?" The second said. He was another backer.

"Get. Up." DJ replied. They all rolled their eyes, standing up I'm exagerated motions. The managers snatched the bottles. DJ pointed to each one. "Strap up and stay straped up. The only reason your cap shouldn't be on, and not tied up, is because you just got fucking rocked and need medical attention. Am I clear?"

They sighed. "Yeah." They started buttoning their pads up. DJ gave a mental sigh. Freshman year, we didn't have anyone like that.

Just a minute before the game, DJ gathered the offensive line. "Boys, listen. You guys in the trenches are the heart of this team. You aren't too fast, but damm you fuckers hit hard. Hit them hard, drive them back." DJ laughed. "Every pancake tonight earns each of ya a donut, how's that sound?" The men erupted into cheers DJ smiled to himself. "Let's fucking do this!"

The halftime came much too quick for DJ, and didn't end soon enough. He was thirsty for blood. As kickoff made their way onto the field, he started sceaming at his team. "No mercy! No mercy! Tear their heads off!" He started bounding around, he eventually stopped in his place, he cupped his hands around his mouth. "We're gonne take 'em down!"

The whole team replied. "Tear their heads off!"

"Spit down their throats!"

"And smile when we do it!"

The ball was kicked high, really high. DJ had a perfect angle on one of the smaller guys, but something caught his attention. One of the linebackers for the other team was just jogging. Oh, you're fuckin' dead! DJ changed his angle, headed at a forty-five to the other backer. He got closer and closer, until *CRACK!* DJ earholed the backer, sending him to the ground. The play continued, and DJ started for his position, but a whistle stopped him. He turned, the backer didn't know where he was at. DJ smiled. Bye, bye! As coaches and trainers ran to his side, both teams took advantage of the free time-out. DJ grabbed a water, pouring it down his back.

That's when he saw the freshman.

They were on one knee, talking to each other. DJ set the water in the crate, and stormed towards them. "Are you talking to Him?"

They all looked up at DJ. "No?"

DJ grabbed their pads, lifting them to their feet. "Then don't you fucking dare take a knee. You only get down when you are praying, or the poor bastard is leaving in a stretcher."

"Why?" The third asked.

"This isn't little league, this is highschool football! Wake the fuck up!" As the words left DJ's mouth, the world started to spin. Words painted on the walls in blood red paint, the turf turned to water, and DJ began to sink.

DJ's eyes shot open, just as he was falling back in the bench. "Jesus, shit!" He said as he made solid contact with the ground. He let out a sigh. "Just a dream... must've dozed off." He rolled over, standing to his feat. He looked at the bag. "Hey, used all the bread. But that can't be it? Surely Celestia has more in mind for punishment than feeding ducks?" He shook his head. "Don't push it, DJ. Don't Jinx yourself."

He set the bench back up right, amd began walking back towards the castle, whitch was actually quite a ways away. He took his headphones and phone out of his pocket, and started blaring music. It was always his way out, a way of remembering or forgetting. As one of his favorite songs came on, since his arrival, he could only smile at the guitar ento. "Be my escape, by Reliant K." As he started bobing his head and humming the words, he just thought of getting back home. Surely there was a way? There had to be a way... right?

His thoughts were cut off when his music stopped, and a bird chirped in his ear. He snarled. "Fucking texts..." he started walking, then realized what he said. "Wait, text?" He fumbled for his phone, just as it went ballistic in his hands, vibrating like crazy, the bird never getting past the first note, he even dropped his phone. When he picked it up, his jaw hit the floor. "How...?" Over twenty-thousand texts, and almost five-thousand missed calls, with just as many voicemails. DJ frowned. "I don't understand..." he looked up at the sky. "This is impossible?" Just as he said that, a bright light came from the castle. DJ squinted to see.

As he did, a whining sound entered his ears. Out of a window, shot a red object. Landing just in front of DJ. He bent over, looking at the object. "A Kawasaki?" He looked at it more, inspecting every detail. As he frowned even more, a sound entered his ears.

*CRACK, CRACK! CRACK!* Along with screams from two persons. DJ stood up. He recognized the voice, the bike, and the weapon. "Oh, God. Please! Not her!" Her started in a dead sprint for the castle.

_____________

It had been a task, but she had done it! Cadence sat in the empty room, she began placing the stones, which she stole from Luna's room, in the correct position's. She sat the necklace in the center of the room. She didn't have enough raw power to even attempt to fire up the stones, but the necklace, and all the love in it, could amplify it by ten. She let out a long breath of air, before igniting her horn. The stones rose in the air with the necklace.

The rocks started to shake in a very unsteady action, veering left and right. Cadence tried to concentrate, but lost control. The rocks all fell to the floor, along with the pink princess. She was gasping for air. This is much harder than I thought... She stood up, and thought of her plan again, one last time. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea? Bringing in another, especially if it was anything like him. But from the pictures she saw, she looked innocent, and sweet. Small and harmless, the exact opposite of DJ.

She was greatly wrong.

Her horn once again ignited, and this time, she wasn't giving up. The gems floated into the air, along with the necklace. The stones started shaking once again, but Cadence was quick to react, her horn shot a beam into the necklace. Every link in the chain aimplified her power, sending even more beams through the room, connecting with each stone. They stabilized, and a small blue orb started to form in the center of the room. It grew bigger and bigger, until it was just taller than her, but it still needed direction. She picked up one of the pictures, and thrust it through the portal, along with a large blast of magic.

The portal lurched, and quickly opened to a flat area, grey everywhere. Yellow stripes on it. Cadence squinted to see. A red dot was quickly approaching. Cadence stepped out of the way, hoping the mattresses would cushion the inevitable impact. A second passed, and the red object flew through, colliding with the spings. The portal shut, and Cadence fell to the floor gasping for air.

The two wheeled machine slammed into the mound, sending the rider over, colliding with the wall. The motor on the vehicle shut down, and silence filled the room. Then, the creature moved. It was much smaller then DJ, width and height. It coughed as it took off its black helmet, with the black visor. It tossed it on the floor, and looked around the room.

"Whaaaaa...." was all she said, he jaw hitting the floor.

Cadence stood up. "Hello, I know yo..."

Before Cadence could understand what was happening, the human dove for her vehicle, bringing the beast to life. "Get back!" She yelled, reving the engine. Cadence didn't notice her grab a black object from her bag.

Cadence put up her hooves. "No, wait, listen!" She pleaded.

The human hit the throttle, sending the red object speeding straight for the alicorn. Cadence moved out of the way with ease as the bike flew through the window. She turned to the human. "Listen, I ha..."

The human pulled the trigger of the small black object. Twice in rapid succession, then a third. Each impacting the alicorn. Cadence screamed in pain, and unconsciously fired a massive ball of fire at the human.

The human hit the floor, rolling to get the flames off. Cadence just lay on the floor. What have I done?

__________

Celestia stepped out of her private quarters at the strange sound. His weapon is being guarded? How did he get it again? Just as she turned to head for the noise, curved around the corner at a dead sprint. A look of fear struck across his face. Celestia took another step to slow DJ. He just frowned, as he got closer he put his hands out in front of him. He jumped, pressing his hands on her back, vaulting himself over her.

Celestia grabbed him with her magic. "Where are you going?"

He thrashed in her magic. "Let me go, dammit!" He was turned to face Celestia. "Those shots, weren't mine."

Celestia's eyes got wide. Her horn ignited, sending them to the source of the sound. As DJ hit the floor,his eyes fell upon the human being bit by the red flames. He looked around the room, grabbing a curtain from the window, he threw it over her, patting her with his hands.

Celestia looked at the pink alicorn, who had three bleeding holes. Celestia lowered her horn, touching each wound. The holes closed up, bit left a nasty scar. Cadence slowly opened her eyes. "What ha..." her eyes landed on DJ, who was still patting the curtains.

"Cadence..." Celestia started.

"Get away!" The voice under the curtains screamed. DJ held up his hands, letting the other human curl up into a ball.

DJ looked over at the pistol, and slipped it into his pocket. "Shhh.... it'll all be over soon." DJ glanced to Celestia. "Sedatives?" He mouthed.

Celestia nodded, and walked over to DJ, placing her horn over the curtains. As the horn ignited, the shaking slowly began to stop. When it did, DJ removed the curtain. Celestia sighed. "She needs to be hospitalized, these burns are very serious."

DJ remained silent, brushing the charred hair from her face. Celestia thought she saw a tear forming in DJ's eyes as he buried his head in her chest. "No... not you too..." he said.When he stood, he kept his faceturned, away from the ponies. "There's a Kawasaki Ninja not far from the gardens. Red, two wheels. She'll want that."

Celestia nodded. "It will be retrieved."

As her horn was getting ready to ignite, to send them all to the hospital, the door burst open. A white and purple pony at the door. "We heard a noise co..." Their eyes darted from DJ, to the other human, the Celestia, then to Cadence, who lay in a pool of blood. The two's horns started glowing as they glared daggers at DJ. "What did you do to Cadence?!"

DJ pulled the pistol from his pocket, aiming it at the two. "I didn't do shit. You two can fuck off."

They didn't buy it.

Country loves techno

DJ gripped the pistol even tighter in his palm. His teeth were grinding so loud, he thought the others could hear. He shot a glance to the human on the floor, out cold. DJ started running scenarios through his head, trying to find a way to make it out without wasting all her ammo, which she found even more precious than him.

He had always been, not scared, but respectful of the woman who lay on the floor. She was far faster than she was, and could stop on a dime, soccer was her sport. She didn't do cheerleading or track. She was in the rodeo. The first time DJ went to one of her events, is when he learned not to fuck with her. As the whistle blew, she and her horse had taken off at incredible speed, but that's not what got DJ. What got him, was at a random point, she jumped off the horse, who was running at full sprint, tackled an animal, threw it to the ground, and tied its legs together in just a few seconds. He knew that she could do that to him at any time. They almost never argued.

DJ kept the sights locked on Twilight, instead of Shining. Sister goes down, he'll get pissed and miss. I'll have a clear shot. But he wasn't going to make the first move. That's when Celestia intervened.

"Enough! All of you!" Her voice boomed, she yanked the pistol from DJ's hands, and her horn ignited, causing the other ponies' to spark, and stop glowing. "These two need medical attention, and you only wish to cause more harm!"

DJ turned to Celestia. "Then get them out of here! For fuck's sake." He leaned over, gently moving his arms under the burned woman. "But I carry her. None of you fuckers dare touch her." He stood up, the woman laying in his arms. He looked down at the burned flesh. Why you?

Cadence stood to her hooves. "I'm fine, just a little sore." She said, obviously in immense pain.

Armor walked past DJ. "No, you're not fine. You're going to the hospital." He said, motioning for Twilight to help carry the alicorn. As the trotted by DJ, who was walking as calmy as possible, they exchanged glanes that said. "Did you see two, too?"

DJ was walking with his eyes fixed ahead. It was hard to see, but if you would have looked close enough at DJ's face, you would be able to see it trembling with hate and anger.

__________________________________

Luna stood next to her sister as the looked through the one way glass. She leaned over. "How is she?"

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Cadence? Internal bleeding, sone scars, and a decent amount of pain."

Luna shook her head. "No, the other her."

Celestia turned her head, looking at the bed occupied by the human. Her skin was completely black in some places, while others looked untouched. DJ was on his knees by the bed, asleep, his head resting on her stomach, and his hands wrapped around one of hers. "Burns all over, our magic could heal her, and leave very little scar. They have already started treatment. Luckily for her, Cadence was never great with offensive spells, especially under pressure."

Luna nodded, then turned back to looking at the humans. "They recovered the 'Ninja' that came with her. Unlike DJ's vehicle, hers looks to be in relatively good shape. From the looks of it, all the protective gear she had on was very important, just for riding."

Celestia turned to her sister. "How so?"

"DJ's vehicle was enclosed, he was in a cage of sorts. With the 'Ninja,' the rider is out in the open. That's a reason she had on the gear. It is also nothing like DJ's, but you saw that."

A nurse walked up behind the sisters. "Princess Celestia, Princess Luna. I am pleased to inform you that both of them are stable for the moment. Cadence should be able to leave very soon if we keep our treatment up. And... ummm..." the nurse rubbed the back of her head. "What was the name of the other?"

Celestia and Luna exchanged glances. "We don't know. DJ won't tell us, and took her bag before we could get any form of I.D."

"Vert well then. Patient three-zero-B has a long road ahead of her. The major burns are around her torso, arms, and a few minor burns on her face. She will be in pain when she wakes up, but DJ requested he be the first to see her awake, to explain what happened." She looked to Celestia. "By my understanding, he has work tomorrow?"

Celestia shook her head. "I will take with Ms. Hooves, I'm sure she will understand." She turned her head, DJ was dreaming, his body slightly twitching. She turned to Luna. "Sister..."

Luna gave a nod, before her horn ignited, making her vanish.

______________________

Inside the dream, it was nothing but a white void. The only way she knew where DJ was is the way the dream made her mane blow, away from the controller. She extended her wings, thrusting herself towards where DJ should be.

She flew until she saw spinning boxes. They circled around DJ, who just sat down, watching each one. Luna silently flew behind him, watching the images as they flew by. Dates... She thought to herself. DJ put his hand out, stopping the images, he pressed his hand in, starting a video.

"No! Don't delete it!" She pleaded, grabbing DJ's arm, a smile plastered onto her face.

"This game is stupid! You've won, what, fifty times to my three?"

"What about those games you and Mason aways talk about? They sound much more complicated than this, this should be a piece of cake!"

"They're more complex, they're also a ton easier! I see something move, I shoot it! This is... I'm not good with word games..."

"DJ!'

"Ryan!" DJ stopped the memory, and the images started to circle once again. He let out a sigh. "Game sucked..." he said.

Luna just stared at each image as it passed by. Oh, her name is Ryan? she was lost in thought, she didn't hear a small clicking noise. When she came back to 'reality,' she was staring into a long barrel.

"What are you doing here?" The weapon in DJ's hands was long, a split barrel weapon. The lights on the front depicting the bars. He cliked the button and let go multiple times, forming sparks and small rotating rings.

Luna started pleading. "No! Wait!"

The gun started a small whine, a blue light emmiting from it as well. "Sucks to suck." The weapon shot the projectile at incredible speeds. Luna was gone. DJ threw the weapon to the ground, and started the next video.

Luna hit the floor with her eyes closed. It didn't hurt this time, it was only one hit. The blast was an instant kill shot, when she looked up, Celestia was leaning over, offering a base for Luna to stand. She slowly rose, and let out a long breath of air. "Her name is Ryan, and they are in a relationship." Luna said.

Before Celestia could speak, the door behind her was thrown open. "Auntie Tia! The guards aren't allowing me to go in the gardens!" He looked past the Princess into the room, his eyes got wide at the second human. "There's two?!"

"Blueblood, this is the reason you can't go in the gardens. We are still trying to look for more parts of her vehicle." The Prince snorted before walking out. Celestia turned to the glass, just as DJ's eyes shot open, a look of fear etched into his face. His dream had turned into a nightmare.

Celestia opened the door to the room. "DJ?" She called.

The room was filled with music, but nothing like what DJ listened to. This had a much more up and out tone to it, an acoustic guitar, and a man with a deep voice. "What." He replied, his eyes never leaving Ryan.

Celestia took in a deep breath. "You are not required to work tomorrow, I will speak with Ms. Hooves." He gave a grunt, signalling he heard her. Celestia listened to the music more. "What is this?"

"Trash. I've always hated country music, with a passion. 'My dog died, so I went to the bar and got drunk, when I came home my wife kicked me out, so I went back to the bar. But this is her favorite song, of all time she says." He smiled and shook his head. "It never made any sense. She likes Taylor Swift, I like Nero. She likes Kenny Chesnee, I like Powerman5000. She likes Reba, I like Eminem."

"Do you two only have musical diffrences?"

DJ shook his head. "She's country, born and raised. The only things that say otherwise are her bike and phone. Me on the other hand, I grew up in technology, a city boy. The only thing for me is my love of trucks, fishin' and huntin'."

Cadence, who just woke, asked a simple question. "If you two have so many differences, how did you to come to be?"

DJ took in a deep breath. "A bet."

Cadence raised an eyebrow. "A bet?"

Luna walked in the room, beside Celestia. "If you are willing, we could project the memory onto the wall?" She suggested.

DJ sighed, looking at the two eager, and one neutral, faces. "Whatever, as long as it don't hurt." He said.

Celestia shook her head. "Not at all, just focus on the memory, and I will project it."

DJ nodded, and an idea formed in his head. I'll make the game look real! As Celestia's horn touched DJ's head, he clipped the memory, allowing only the most important thing to show.

The M4.

DJ took the binoculars from his eyes, turning to Corben. "They've got a dozen or so foot soldiers, plus a hummer, and two choppers." DJ placed the binoculars in his bag, which was overflowing with LSD.

Tyler crawled up next to DJ. "Should we try Bravo? Seems like every single one of 'em are here."

DJ shook his head. "They have two loaded SUV's there, saw them earlier when I was still sporting the hatchback. What we need, is a distraction."

Tyler nodded. "I'll rob the bank, that should grab their attention."

Corben nodded. "And I took this DMR off a cop earlier, the chopper pilots should be easy if they sit still."

As Tyler got on his motorbike and sped off, DJ reloaded his M4. "Just have to get some.random to try and pass through, they'll do their routine stop, and boom!"

As the two sat in silence, drawing in the sand, DJ didn't expect the next question. "Dude, why don't you ever have a girlfriend?"

DJ snickered. "Uh, no job?"

"So? Don't be a bitch! You need a girl, dude."

"Really?" Corben gave a nod. "And what makes you think I can just walk up to any girl and get them?"

Corben smiled. "You can't, that's the thing!" He started laughing, before a siren sounded in the distance. Tyler had the money, amd was speeding away. The gates dropped at the checkpoint, and the troop carriers sped off with sirens blaring. Only one chopper and two cops remained.

DJ smiled as he walked over to the white truck. "You just take down the fuckin' chopper, I'll deal with these two."

Corben shrugged, before laying on the ground. DJ drove the vehicle around the small hill, coming up to the checkpoint. He shut his engine off, and his his assault rifle under the seat. "Sir, step out of the vehicle."

"Yes, sir." DJ said, as he opened the door. As he slammed it shut, a bullet ripped through the air, sending the helicopter to the ground in smoke.

"What the he..." The first cop said, before his stomach swallowed three magnum shots. Thw second cop took a single shot to the dome.

"Simple enough." He said, placing the pistol back in the holster.

Corben got in the passenger side of the truck as DJ lowered the gate. As he got in, Corben wore a mischievous grin. "I know..."

DJ frowned as he started the vehicle. "Know what?"

"You know Ryan? I'm seventh hour?"

"Yeah?" He said, running over the cop's remains.

"Her. Tomorrow, before seventh hour, I fucking dare you to ask her out."

DJ laughed. "Man, you know me, I can't just do that."

"You won't, fuckin pussy!" Corben said with a smile.

"You're right, I won't."

Corben's smile grew bigger. "Fine, I guess I'll just have to..." he looked out the window. "...egg Lil' Red."

"You do it, you'll fuckin' die." DJ said, swerving to miss a random ATV in the road.

"Hey, just for dinner. If you don't, she gets egged."

As the vision collapsed, the faces in the room were all in shock. "You just... killed... your own kind!"

DJ laughed. "It's a game, Arma two, I knew it would get to ya." He let out a happy sigh. "So that happened, and here we are."

"She accepted?"

A new voice filled the room, raspy, in pain, and feminine. "Yes..." DJ turned to look at Ryan, who still hadn't opened her eyes. "And it was the worst date ever!"

Love is like a bet

"R-Ryan?" DJ walked over to the burned woman.

Ryan's eyes shot open. "Django!" She went to sit up, but moaned in pain, she lowered herself back to the bed.

"You've had a rough day... just relax, okay?"

Ryan's eyes had met DJ's. "Is it really you?"

DJ smiled. "In the flesh."

She frowned. "We thought.... we all thought different things.... some said you ran away, others said you were kidnapped... and others said..." a tear rolled down her cheek. "Some said you were dead..."

DJ groaned. "Well, one of those is true." He turned to glare at the princesses, but they had teleported away once Ryan woke, and Cadence tried to make herself as small as possible.

As DJ wiped the tear away, Ryan looked up at him. "Are we dead?"

DJ sighed. "We aren't lucky enough to be dead, Ry. I should be. You don't deserve this."

She looked around the room. "Is this one of those lucid dreams you talk about?"

DJ shook his head. "No, and even if it was, you would have just collapsed it. You aren't supposed to mention dreams around DC's. They go crazy."

"So... if we aren't dead... and this isn't a dream... were we...?"

DJ nodded. "Yeah, we were kidnapped."

Ryan's hand felt her hip, looking for the usually rough holster, holting her pistol. She was in shock when instead she was in a hospital gown, and felt bare skin. "Why are we in a hospital if we were kidnapped?"

He grabbed a mirror from the side table, angling it so she could see the burns. "When you were kidnapped, you obtained some pretty bad burns."

Ryan went to grab the mirror, but DJ pulled back, shaking his head. "So... where are we?"

"Remember those people me, Brendan, and Mason all used to poke fun at?"

Ryan racked her mind, then found the word. "The... bronies?"

"Turns out, their world is real." DJ moved aside, allowing Ryan to see the pink alicorn in the bed. She gave a sheepish grin and wave.

Ryan, however, wanted to kill the animal that lay across from her, for all the burns. She remembered, flying through the orb, shooting the creature, a wall of fire engulfing her, then blackness. She went to jump out of the bed, when DJ grabbed her shoulder, holding her down. "DJ, you better let me go..."

DJ shook his head. "You're in no shape, just lay down. I'll wring her neck for you later." He shot a deadly glare at Cadence, who cowered under the blankets. Ryan let out a long breath of air, and leaned against the bed frame. "From the looks of it, your recovery is going to be much longer than mine."

Ryan looked up at DJ. "What happened to you that night?"

DJ pulled a chair up, and started telling his tale. The concussion, the deer, the portal, the hospital, the spa, at which she laughed and demanded a massage when she was all better, the concert, which DJ received a strong slap on the face, then finally the necklace. Her hand went to her throat, her own necklace missing.

"Where is it? Where are they? Mine and yours?"

DJ shrugged. "I honestly have no id...." he heard a jingling sound, and a weight in his pocket. He stuffed his hand in, whem he pulled it out, the two necklaces dangled in his fingers. "I guess they're right here..."

She stuck her hand out, DJ placed her in her hand. She clenched it tight, never wanting it to leave her again.

DJ groaned, and rubbed the back of his head, he heard a light pop, and Celestia stood behind him. "DJ, she needs another treatment..."

DJ went to protest, but felt a soft hand on his shoulder, he turned, Ryam gave him a nod. "I'll be fine, she seems to know what she's doing. From what you said, she's the only one that hasn't done anything."

DJ just stared at Ryan. "You sure about this?"

She nodded. "Unlike you, I'm smart enough not to get thrown in the dungeons." She giggled and winked at DJ, who just rolled his eyes.

"Alright, I got thrown in the dungeons, b..."

"Twice." She added with a smile.

"Fine, I got thrown in the dungeons twice, big deal." He sighed. "You sure you're alright with this?"

She nodded. "I want back on my feet as fast as possible. Whatever it takes." At that, Celestia's horn ignited, sending Ryan into a deep sleep.

DJ gave her a kiss on the forehead, before turning and leaving the room. Cadence looked at Celestia. "Even as bad as my idea was..... it has already shown a good side."

Celestia turned to Cadence. "How?"

Cadence smiled. "He didn't use one curse word."

As she said that, a crashing noise sounded through the room from outside. "God, fucking, dick licking, son of a bitch, bastard shit, DAMMIT!

Celestia looked at Cadence with a raised eyebrow. She just sheepishly grinned. "Well..... almost..."

__________________________

The next day, thirty burn treatments later.

Ryan sat in a wheelchair that was almost too small for her. She looked out onto the field, where DJ was doing his hundred yard sprints. She wanted on the field so bad, just to beat him. She knew she could, and he knew she could. That was his motivation. 'Beat Ryan.' Her train of thought was cut short at the sound of hooves behind her. She turned, to see a pink alicorn.

"Listen, I know you most likely hate me right now, but I just wanted to apologize. For dragging you through, and your burns."

Ryan smiled. "Apology accepted. I'm sorry for shooting you." She stuck out her hand. "We've never been introduced. I'm Ryan."

Cadence just stared blankly at Ryan, she hadn't expected her to accept, AND apologize. She thought she would be like DJ, and do neither. She stuck out her hoof. "Cadence."

Ryan turned back to the field. Cadence had so many questions to ask her, so she decided she would just start with a recent one. "Last night, you said your date was the worst ever...."

Ryan started laughing. "Oh God, you have no idea! You see, DJ hadn't had a girlfriend for fifteen years when he asked me out."

Cadence turned to Ryan. "How old was he? He's seventeen now, right?"

Ryan nodded. "Yup, and when we started dating, he was fifteen."

Cadence's eyes got wide. "So it was his first date? Ever?" Ryan gave a nod. "What happened?"

Ryan smiled. "Well, first off, I was a couple months older than him, so I had to pick him up at his house. Then, when we went to the restaurant, it was just horrible." She smiled to herself. "He was all jittery, muttering things to himself, cursing Corben under his breath. Then, when the food came, it was all messed up. We gor some other table's order, which was twice as much as ours, and the owner refused and refused. So we finally ate it. But! DJ only brought enough to cover his meal, not this extravagant meal that was given to us. I had to help him pay for his food!" Ryan leaned back in her chair and started laughing, ignoring the pain of the burns. DJ on the field heard the laughter and looked up in the stands. He just shook his head and returned to his workout.

Cadence turned to Ryan, a smile on her face aswell. "So you had to pick him up, and pay for his meal?"

Ryan put out a hand. "Oh, I'm not finished!" She said. "Then, when we went to leave, the battery was dead." She got a blank stare. "We had to ask someone for help starting the Jeep. So we get a jump, and we're on the way to his house, and we almost run out of gas! We had to stop at the gas station to fill up. Now, at the time, I didn't know him that well, and had no idea of his Jeep phobia. The whole ride he looked like he was going to go nuts."

Cadence shook her head. "How did you two end up here then?"

Ryan just smiled. "When I dropped him off, he said 'I am so sorry for all this. The whole thing was a bet, and I know there's no way this could work out. Sorry for wasting your time.' And he shut the door. I just smiled to myself and said 'challenge accepted!'"

"So that's what you think of it? A challenge?" Cadence asked.

Ryan nodded. "It's easy to just push someone away, but the real challenge is finding what you two have in common, and using that as a foundation. When I told him abou the challenge, he laughed at me, saying that even if I tried, there was no way it would work out. So, I had to find something we had in common."

"Which was?"

"We both lacked motivation to get better. So our first few dates, weren't really dates. We would run. But we would run for hours on end, not wanting the other to go farther. We were are in the best shape of our lives." We were more along the lines of gym buddies than boy and girlfriend."

Cadence was still confused. "So how did you get where you are now?"

Ryan looked Cadence in the eyes. "My right ankle was shattered the same year we started 'dating.' We were having soccer practice, and someone went to slide tackle me, and just tore my ankle to pieces. DJ took it upon himself, to get me back on my feet as soon as possible. He pushed me to my limits." She smiled. "And I loved him for it. A similar thing happened when he broke his back. I pushed him to his limits, and he loved it. We started our relationship seriously after that, after we helped each other get our lives back, so we owed them to each other."

___________________________________

DJ walked through the lockeroom towards his locker, holding all his clean clothes. As he opened it, he heard two others complaining about something, he decided to listen in.

"This is bucking stupid!" The first said, slamming his locker

"Trench, just calm down, alright?"

"Calm down? CALM DOWN! I AM ALMOST A JUNIOR IN COLLEGE, AND STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT MY TALLENT IS!"

"Trench, I know how you feel, but don't understand why you're just now flipping out about it."

"Because, Willie, I could have swore jousting would have been it! You know, on the front lines? The trenches!"

As the two left the room, all DJ could do was smile to himself as thoughts ran through his head. Phillydelphia Eagles, Canterlot Chargers, Ponyville Panthers.

Verbal warfare

DJ stirred in his bed, not wanting to go to work at the spa. He hated it, every second of it. He graoned as he made an attempt to stand up, and unfortunately, suceeding. He got dressed, and was beginning to wash his face, waking himself up, when there was a knock on the door. But not his door, the door to the room just across the hall. The door to Ryan's room. DJ's curiosity got the best of him, as he went to investigate.

He cracked his door, just enough to see out. A white alicorn standing in front of the door. Ryan opened it, and a smile spread on her face. "Celestia, good morning!" She said, still in her sleepwear.

"Good morning to you as well. May I come in?"

"Of course!" Ryan stepped aside, allowing the alicorn through. When she shut the door, DJ ran over. He pressed his ear to the door.

"What brings you by?"

Celestia sighed. "I have a couple questions for you, if you wish to answer?"

"Sure!" He heard a chair scoot across the floor. "What do ya wanna know?"

"First off, how are your burns?"

"Much much better! IIt's unreal, this magic! I was healed in days what would have taken weeks!"

There was a chuckle. "Very good. Cadence is very, very sorry for what she did. It was her reaction."

"I already said it was alright! I mean, I did put a couple shots in her." There was a small laughter. "'Pop! Pop! Pop, watchin' niggas drop,' as DJ says when he's playing his games." DJ smiled to himself. Never got to get her to play Halo....

"You and DJ? He said you too were almost complete oppisites?"

"Well that's the understatement of the century! You see, he calls himself a 'gamer,' so devoted in his games, he was actually going to college to learn code, and attempt to land a job at Valve."

"Code?"

"I don't understand it, but it's a bunch of numbers and words in order, and they do different things. Electronic stuff."

"And what of you? What did you want to do?"

"Honestly, I want to be a vet. Sure, my hobby involves roping animals, but I just love being around them!"

DJ could hear intrest in Celestia's voice. "Oh really? And what of your education? Do you value it?"

"Of course! Without it, we're lost!" DJ knew what Celestia was doing. He knew exactly what she was doing.

"That's good! Always good to see others that value knowledge!" Before DJ was about to stop the conversation, she asked another question. "What happened to DJ?"

This took Ryan by surprise. "What do you mean?"

There was a small sigh. "Something happened in his past, Luna has seen it in his dreams. Nothing would ever act the way they do without just cause."

Ryan let out a deep breath of air. "He really doesn't like to talk about it, and only a few people know. I really don't think I should go behind his back." DJ smiled. Thanks.

"That is understandable." DJ sighed. Maybe she should know... she's providing the roof over my head...

DJ knocked on the door. "Ryan? It's alright... tell her the story..." He said as he opened the door. "I haven't been thinking straight, maybe a blast from the past will set my head in the right direction."

Ryan nodded, turning to the white alicorn. "His dad, when DJ was born, was a senior in highschool, seventeen years old. His dad and biological mother lived together for a little over a year, and married as soon as possible. Highschool sweet hearts." She motioned to DJ. "That's the reason he requested we have different rooms. He knows he'll be tempted, and doesn't want to repeat a major mistake in his family."

DJ nodded. "Still got the 'V card' too..."

Ryan continued. "At two years old, his dad caught the mother cheating with another man. They divorced immediately, leaving a toddler in a custody battle. The battle lasted for years, and technically, isn't over. But when he was forced to go to her house, made him want to leave even more. They were pushing drugs, abusive, and just put DJ in a corner of hell..." She turned to DJ. "But even through all that, he remained firm... until last year."

Celestia raised a brow. "What happened last year?"

DJ sighed. "One of my best friends had a baby when he was in the eighth grade. I started to distance myself from him, to protect myself. Well, his mother started talking with that b... woman, and the two became best friends. So he started inviting me over, before I knew what happened. I kept saying no, I got track, or no, I have YouTube videos to record, I was a YouTube wannabe, anyway, I finally say I'll come over. When my dad goes to drop me off, something churned in my stomach. My gut. I looked over and said 'can you wait until I text you? Something's not right...' He said of course, and I went inside.

"When I opened the door, I was greeted by warm smiled from Bryan and his mom and dad, sister and aunt. They all said hey, and pointed a chair out for me. I sat, and went to grab the controller, zombies playing on the screen. Then, a hand grabbed my wrist. I looked up, and behold. The one I hated most in the world."

Celestia was wide eyed. "What did you do?"

DJ rubbed the back of his head. "Something I'm not proud of... at all... and probably deserve to burn in hell for it." Celestia continued to stare. "I had the blade dance around my fingers, and when they stopped, it was resting on his baby's neck." DJ put his head between his hands. "He tried to rush towards me, so I picked the baby up, blade still pressed to the neck. I started screaming commands, move here, movr there, F you. I eventually backed out of the house, set the screaming baby on the steps, and sprinted for the car." DJ looked up. "That's when I realized, that fear is a powerful tool. Trust is a deadly trait. And betrayal, is the biggest reality check you can ever experience. I realized, that I was way too open to too many people."

"You threw away friendships, because of the act of one other?" She asked.

"I had to! What else could I do? Let them all just tear me apart? No. I wouldn't let anyone close to me." DJ looked over to Ryan. "That's why I was so awkward at first, I didn't want to fall for someone, and them drop me, like in the past." DJ stood up. "Celestia, spa. Now."

She nodded, her horn ignited, and he was gone. In his scented prison. Celestia looked at Ryan. "So his best friend went behind his back?"

Ryan nodded. "His family even had plans on moving to Colorado that summer, but DJ said no. He said that it would make them look like cowards, running away from their problems. So they stayed."

Celestia lookw d around the room. "Would you mind, if my student came in here to ask you a few questions as well?"

Ryan leaned back in her seat. "I have nothing better to do!" She said with a smile.

___________________________

"Ask her if she likes parties!" Pinkie said as she, Twilight, and her friends all made their way to the new alien's room.

"Pinkie, just ask her yourself! Princess Celestia said she had no problem with answering questions." Twilight almost squeeled as she got closer to the door. "A face to face conversation with an alien!"

Rainbow Dash snorted. "Yeah, an alien the almost killed Princess Cadence!"

Twilight looked back at her cyan friend. "She said she was sorry..." She took in a deep breath as she opened the door. They were met with two warm smiles.

"You must be Twilight, and her friends!" Ryan said, standing up and extending her arm.

As Twilight went to extend her hoof, a pink blur darted in front of her. "Hi! My name's Pinkie Pie! What's your name?"

"My name's Ryan." She said with a smile. "Pinkie, could you introduce me to your friends?"

The mare's smile was ear to ear. She bounded over to each of the ponies, saying hello, and learning a little about them. When they came to the cyan pegasus, it was a little more tense. "And this is Rainbow Dash! She's the fastest flier in all Equestria!"

Ryan stuck out her hand. "So you're competitive?"

Rainbow Dash gave a nod. But nothing more.

Ryan made a weird face, and drew her hand back. "So, Twilight, it's my understanding you wanted to ask me a few questions?"

Twilight beemed with exitement. "Yes! Yes of course!" Her horn ignited, rolling out a long scroll. "First question. Where are you from?"

"Born, or raised?"

Twilight shrugged. "Both."

"Born in Norman, raised in Noble."

"And what about....." She stalled out, thinking she crossed some line.

"He was born in Norman, too, spent hie first few years in Maysville, then moved to Noble. All in the state of Oklahoma, United States."

Twilight was writing notes furiously. "What was the device you used to attack Cadence called?"

She let out a long breath of air. "It's a gun, a pistol. It is a P32 pocket pistol. DJ's is a shotgun, a BPS."

Before Twilight could ask another question, Pinkie jumped in front of her, sticking her hoof in the air. "Oh! Pick me! Pick me!"

"Alright, Pinkie?"

"What's your favorite color?!"

"Green."

"Do you have any pets?!"

"Many."

"What kinds?"

"Dogs, cats, horses, cattle, pigs, goats, mules, donkeys, and a rabbit, but she comes and goes."

"Do you like parties?"

"Planned or surprise?"

The ponies all stared, their jaws on the floor as the human was able to keep up with Pinkie's questions. Giving an answer immediatley afterwards. The back and forth between the impressed even Celestia. The way Ryan kept her smile, while not only surving, but over throwing the bombardment of questions thrown at her. Then, the tables turned, and somehow, Ryan was the one asking questions to the hyper pony. Where was she from? What did she do? Favorite food?

Needless to say, Ryan would fit in just fine with Equestria.

But how could Celestia get DJ to her level of joy?

Let the games...

DJ leaned back in his chair, plugging the phone into the stereo system, his personal music filling the room. 'Chop Suey!' the first song on the playlist. He leaned back, and grabbed the newspaper that was on his stereo. It was a day old, but he was still interested in the outside world. What was happening in Manehatten? Appleoosa? He learned that a distance branch of the apple family had purchased a mountain range, renaming it the "Appleation mountains." But the paper he held in his hands, wasn't so far away.

A picture of him, screaming in Luna's face, a look of anger and hate filling his eyes with static and blood behind him. Luna, holding back tears. DJ brought his hand to his mouth. "Good God..... is that really what I looked like?" He looked at the faces in the background. Terror writen all over them. He looked back at himself. A feeling of gief washing over him.

"Another Nightmare?" He read. "At the Grand Galloping Gala, everything was perfect. The beverages; perfect. Snacks; perfect. Atmosphere; perfect. The dresses; perfect. So what was the big disturbance that everypony is talking about? That, has both fact and fiction writen all over it.

"So let's start with the facts. Princess Celestia had said that she had a special guest, a newcomer. Not only to the city or country, but the world. This means that our visitor, is an alien from another planet. She called everypony together so they could all watch a musical performance, performed by this alien. However, this was not what we were expecting.

"The alien could not use magic, and had to use a ring, containing channeled magic, to do it's performance. The performance involved blood, screaming, foul language, and rebellious attitute towards our Princess Celestia, and Princess Luna."

DJ crumpled the paper into a ball, tossing it into the trash bin across the room. He didn't need to read anymore. He knew what it would say. 'Deadly, dangerous, and alien!' He groaned, rubbing the back of his head. He was starting to realize what he had done. He had not been planning for his future, and just closed multiple doors.

But, when one door closes, another opens.

__________________________

Ryan glanced over to Celestia. "Why do they look like they are about to kill me?" She asked.

As the two had left the castle for a tour of Canterlot, the reaction had been the same. A death glare towards the human. Celestia looked over. "It is because of DJ's actions at the Grand Galloping Galla. You see, he already told you what he did, but has yet to actually see what he's done."

"You mean his scare at the party?"

She nodded. "In their eyes, he assaulted me and my sister. He is considered a terrorist, a threat to our peaceful nation. However, few saw them with their own eyes. You fit the description, standing on two legs, blue eyes, hair only on your head. The diffrences may be ignored right now."

"Are they going to do anything to me?" Ryan asked, placing her hand om her hip, and once again, the pistol was missing.

Celestia shook her head. "As long as they see us talking, they will only gaze. I will be making an announcement this afternoon to show you and DJ mean us no harm. That s where we are going now."

"To the spa he works at?" She recieved another nod. Ryan smiled. "He wasn't joking about that?" She started laughing. "Oh, that's hilarious! He wouldn't be caught dead in a spa, let alone working in one!"

"He is considered to be one of the greatest massage therapists in Equestria, some say even farther. He usually requires an appointment, but a few ponies had to cancel theirs, I managed to squeeze one in for you and I. It has been far too long since I have been away from my royal duties."

Ryan shook her head. "It must be tough being you, especially these last few weeks with DJ."

Celestia nodded. "It has been difficult, but we've made it through so far."

Ryan grinned a little. "He's doing a lot better than I would have expected though. Football's his life. Even though his season was over, proffesional was still playing. He hasn't had a chance to watch another down."

"What of the film on his phone?" Celestia asked.

"Film gets old. He memorizes it, you could ask him a random question on a random play, and he'd get it right."

As the two entered the Spa, they were greeted by a warm smile and bow. "Princess Celestia! It's always good to see you!" She looked up at Ryan. "Oh? Who is this?" She asked.

Ryan stuck out her hand. "Ryan." She said with a grin.

"Well, Ryan, you are the only other human in this world I've seen. Are you here to see DJ?' Or DéJà?"

"DJ..." About that time, the bass in the other room hit, sending shockwaves through the building. Ms. Hooves sighed.

"He always listens to that music so loud!" She complained. She shook her head. "His first appointment isn't for another hour. He always gets here pretty early, and likes to listen to it as loud as possible."

Ryan pointed to a door. "Is he in there?" She received a nod. She started for the door, Celestia followed behind.

___________________________

DJ sat with his back turned to the door, arms crossed, and eyes closed. He took in a deep breath, closing his eyes. Trying, for the first time since his arrival, conscious meditation. He had been trying every other night in his dreams the ancient relaxation technique, and it helped calm the dream down, but when he woke, he was refueled with hate.

He decided, that with every pony wanting him dead, and bringing up past events, he should try to calm down the world around him. Of course, it would really be him that had calmed down, but in his mind, everything would no longer be moving at a million miles an hour.

But, meditation was only a temporary solition. He was violent by nature. He needed to feel adrenaline pumping through his veins. Looking across the green, rubber, grass into the eyes of the offensive front. Feel every fiber in his body lifting hundred plus pound men into the air, slamming them into the tar. He needed violence. But he saw his mistakes. The violence he was causing, was random. Chaotic.

What he needed wasn't a tornado ripping through a tornado park, throwing things in different directions. He needed TNT, placed in pre-drilled holes in the side of a mountain, blowing ruble into a large abyss. He needed violence, but controlled violence. The kind you find in the trenches. The kind you find on a field, on the court, in the ring.

The bass pounded in his ears in the small room. He couldn't help but smile. He had an answer. As he opened his eyes, he realized

He was awake.

He felt a hand on his shoulder. "Deedje?"

He opened his eyes, and looked over his shoulder. Ryan had a concerned look on her face. He grabbed his phone, and turned the music down. "Yeah, what's up?"

"You alright?" She asked. DJ saw a white object behind her. No doubt Celestia.

"Never better." He said. He looked at Celestia. "Quick question, do you have anywhere with a padded floor?"

Celestia and Ryan frowned. "Padded floor?" Theh asked in unison.

"Yeah, Ryan, like the Multi." He looked at Ryan. "Every Tuesday and Thursday."

"Oh! Yeah!" She said. She looked at Celestia. "Real soft, cushiony. Bouncy almost."

"The Manhatten asylum for the mentally unstable has something like that. The rooms are verg small though."

DJ frowned. "Seriously? Mentally unstable? And why isn't Pinkie already locked up?"

"Random, happy, and energetic are not symptoms of mental instability."

DJ shook his head. "How long would it take to get some of the floor? Twenty yards long, ten yards wide."

"It would take less than a week, a little over four-hundred bits." She said. "What are you planning?"

"Until I can get my real intentions into the open, I need a way to, legally, blow off steam. A game, from Noble."

Ryan looked at DJ and facepalmed. "You aren't seriously talking about what I think you're talking about, are you?"

DJ smiled and started nodding. "You know!"

Celestia shook her head. "What are you two referring to?"

DJ looked at Celestia. "No Man's Land, and Powerball."

_____________________

A few days later.

Trench and Willie walked through the doors into a small, yellow padded, enclosed, stadium. Trench looked around at the ponies around him. Skinny, fat, muscular, lanky, slow, fast, strong, weak. Unicorns, earth ponies, and pegasi. He looked over to his friend. "What do we do now? We're here."

Willie grabbed the flier with his magic. "It says that it starts at six. That's about five minutes from now." He rolled it up and put it back in his bag. "I guess we just wait?"

Trench sighed and sat down. "It hardly said anything. Just show up and there'll be games." He looked around the room. "Some games." He said, stiffling a laugh.

Willie sighed. "Don't get your feathers in a bunch, we're early. I'm sure the games will be fun?" In all reality, he wasn't too sure himself.

A few minutes passed, and a large door opened. Trench and Willie looked up, and their eyes immediately went to the size of dinner plates. "Princess Celestia!" Everypony in the room said, bowing down.

"My little ponies..." she started, they all looked up. "We have been given the opportunity of a lifetime. New games, from new lands. However. For you to participate in these new games, you have to promise me you will not act with haste." She recieved a chorus of 'Of course!'

Celestia nodded. "Then I would like to introduce you to DJ, the one who will explain thw rules, and will be playing with you." She turned around. "DJ..." She called.

.....divide?

DJ held the ball close to his chest as hooves from all angles continued to back his sides. He looked up, he was just four feet from the bucket. If he could get the ball in, it would be the third point, his team would win, and the beating would stop.

In a quick movement, DJ twisted his spine and back, rolling himself into a position on his knees. He brought his right leg up, and placed his right fist into the mat. He summoned himself, with everything he had, and pushed off.

Though he only made it about two feet, it was enough. He reached out his left arm, and slammed the ball into the basket. A whistle rang through the air. The ponies rolled off of him, and he stood to his feet. Covered in hoof shaped cuts and bruises, a steady stream of blood from his left bicep, he raised his arm in the air. "Victory, bitches!"

"You cheated!" One of the ponies screamed, pulling himself from the floor. "You made it so we couldn'tuse magic or our wings!"

DJ shrugged. "Hey, I don't have those, why should you be able to use them?"

"DJ..." Celestia said, casting her magic over the ponies, taking off their restrictors and healing their wounds. She attempted to help DJ, but he moved away from the aura. "Maybe it would be best if you went back to the castle and rested for a bit?"

DJ grunted. "I just kicked their asses, why would I want to leave?" DJ smiled. "And besides, this just got my blood pumping!"

"DJ!" A voice screamed. DJ's eyes shrunk to a miniscule size. He turned to see a human female walking straight for him.

"Fuck...what'd I do this time?" He mumbled to himself. "Hey, Ry!" He smiled sheepishly. "What's up?"

"You have some explaining to do!" She glared.

Before he could answer, a barley audible whistle was heard. DJ spun on his heels, a green earth pony still had his lips pursed. DJ grabbed the ball from the basket, chunking it at the pony. It let out a yelp as the ten kilo ball sped at him, and hit him in the side. "Do it again, biatch!"

"DJ!" She screamed, landing her hand violently in the back of his head, a large pop filling the room. "What did I tell you about cussin'?!"

"Oww! What'd I do?" He moaned, grabbing his head.

"Where is my CD's?"

DJ frowned. "Your CD's?" She nodded, crossing her arms. "How should I know?"

"Because! I replaced your 'Shinedown' CD with my Taylor Swift. And I can't find it!"

His eyes widened. "That was you? I trashed that."

"You what!" Her fingers all cracked.

DJ started backing up. "I don't listen to that crap! I just tossed it in some garbage bin! You have it downloaded anyway!"

"Uhhh, no? I don't download songs illegal like you!"

"It shouldn't be that easy! They're just asking for it!"

"Just asking for it? It's ILLEGAL!"

DJ frowned. "Ryan, calm down, alright? I may still have them. I'm just giving you a hard time."

"Calm down, you seriously didn't just tell me to calm down? I am in some wasteland, with talking animals! I can't stand it!" Tears started flowing in her eyes. "I just wanted some music to help me remember! And you threw them away!"

Well, looks like reality just bitch slapped the shit out of her too. "Ryan, it's alright." He motioned for her, but she turned away. DJ heard a small snicker. A spark ignited in his head. He turned, looking for the asshole who laughed. He found them, a unicorn and a pegasus.

Blank flanks.

DJ started walking towards them. "You think that's fucking funny?" They went silent. DJ continued to get closer. "How about I throw you into my world, eh? They'd gut you so fast, you wouldn't know what the hell just happened."

"D..." *sniff* "J..."

"You know what, give me a reason I don't do it right now!" He grabbed the unicorn's horn in his hand. "I'll break this bitch off, and clip that sorry sack of shit there!"

"DJ!" A booming voice rang through the room.

DJ turned his eyes to the monarch. "Fuck off, cunt." He turned back to the stallions. "If I could, you piss stains would be at an Elmer's glue factory!" He pulled the two eye to eye with him. "Do you under..... stand............." DJ's eyes rolled into the back of his head, and an aura of light fell over him. Celestia's horn brightly glowing.

Ryan rubbed her eyes. "What did you do to him?"

Celestia turned to Ryan. "A simple sleeping spell. He should be awake in about an hour." She looked down at DJ. "That was much more violent than he has been in the past."

Ryan wiped the remaining tears on her face away with her shirt. "He doesn't like it when people laugh at him. He was bullied as a little kid, and takes it to heart."

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "So, that's why he is this way? He is attempting to avoid the situation by being like one of them." Ryan nodded. "Celestia gave a smile. "I believe I know how to help both of you, however, he mag not agree to it as quickly."

As the two talked, Ryan's smile got wider and brighter. He thought the idea was perfect, and just what he needed. They were so in depth in their conversation, neither saw a theif steal DJ's ring, straight from his finger.

_________________________

Twilight sat at her desk, her most recent trip to Canterlot had been eyeopening. She now knew, there wete other creatures out there. Other forms of intelligent life. But that didn't mean they were all friendly. Her train of thought was cut off when a small knock rapped on her door.

"Coming!" She yelled. She trotted down the stair, to find a yellow pegasus with a letter in her mouth. "Fluttershy?"

"Mmmcmmss mmmesmmma mmmnt mme m mmmmttmm"

Twilight frowned, using her magic, she took the letter from her mouth. "Could you say that again?"

"Princess Celestia sent me a letter..." Fluttershy looked around. "I don't know what it means!" She whispered.

Twilight raised an eyebrow, unrolled the letter, and read it aloud. "Dear Fluttershy, As you know, we have two foreign visitors, not even from our world. I have just uncovered the reasoning behind the one you know as 'DJ's' chaotic behaviour. I was considering on sending him to Ponyville, but remembered he had requested not to be sent there, under any circumstances. So, I will be sending him to Manehatten, where he will live with the Apple family." Twilight looked up from the letter. "Why did she send this to you?"

"Keep reading..." she replied.

"While he is away, I am asking if you would allow his friend, Ryan, to stay with you. She is nothing like DJ, and loves animals, just as much as you. She will arrive within the next two to three days. Sincerely, Princess Celestia." Twilight looked to Fluttershy. "By the looks of it, Princess Celestia wants to send Ryan here." Her eyes got wide, and a smile from ear to ear formed on her face. "I can ask her more questions that I didn't get to ask back in Canterlot!"

"Ummm... Twilight...."

Twilight's horn ignited, and rolls of paper flew across the room. "Everything! Culture, geography, politics, religion, everything!"

"Twilight..."

"Spike!" Twilight yelled, and a little purple head popped around the corner. "I need you to clean up the library! Even the book shelves!"

He groaned. "I just put the books back."

"Twilight..."

Twilight turned her head towards Fluttershy. "Yes, Fluttershy?"

"I really don't want an alien in my house with all the critters..."

Twilight's smile faded. "What?"

"I mean... I just don't know how they'll act... or how she'll act..."

"Well, she seemed nice with us. A lot more nice than the other one. And he'll be in Manehatten."

"I know, I was just... maybe... she could stay with you until I am sure Angel's alright with it?"

**Describing the heart attack in this scene would be cruel**

Canvas of the future to be

Luna walked through the dark dreamscape, her own dreamscape. It was never filled with the characters or ponies others were able to experience. In Luna's dreams roamed prophicies, from the past, and a new one from time to time. She found it was always fun to study the new, to learn of the future, knowing what to expect. Sometimes they were as simple as a new foal will be born, to a large flood. But this time, it was different.

As Luna walked, she saw a creature. It stood on two legs, its back to Luna. It was just as tall as DJ, but taller than Ryan. It wasn't as wide as DJ either. It wore something that looked like a rugged blue material for pants, and a white shirt with orange stains spotting it. A strap wrapping around the back of its head.

As Luns got closer, the thing turned. In its right hand, it held a strange object. It had a large container on top, with orange balls on the inside, a long barrel, a trigger like Ryan and DJ's weapons, but it also had another cylinder on the back, which appeared to be screwed in.

And it's face, was anything but. It was a mask, with a tinted visor, multiple small holes where the mouth was to be, with a white skull painted over it. It wore black gloves, only allowing the tips of ita fingers to poke through. It wore dark shoes, made of a tough material.

Luna stared, and the more she did, the more appeared. They would walk out from behind the one, wearing similar attire, but with noticeable diffrences. They were all different sizes, from small and fat, to tall and built like a brick shit house. Luna hadn't even noticed the things had surrounded her.

The first raised its weapon, and pulled the trigger.

Instead of the loud explosion that came from DJ's weapon, instead, came a softer 'thunk' noise. But Luna still screamed in pain as the projectile collided with her chest. She looked down, expecting to see a gaping hole, but instead, found an already rising welp, and orange splatter.

The other creatures began to fire the non leathal projectiles, leaving welps and orange spots. Luna was eventually on her knees, pain covering her body. She looked up as the one with the skull mask came up face to face with her. It slowly removed the mask, revealing a set of green eyes, staring into hers. It gave a small smile.

"We're on our way." It said, before placing one more shot right under her chin. Shakinh her awake in the real world.

She sat straight up in her bed, almost jumping out for her journal, her dream journal. Writing every detail. The weapons, all shaped the same, but colors, sizes, and letters were all different. 'Arrow Precision', 'Diablo', 'System X', and 'Brass Eagle'. She drew the common shaped of the weapons, along with the masks.

She looked over at the clock on the wall, it was about time for her to wake anyway. She closed the journal, and made her way to her bathroom, where a small scroll lay. A bit of magic residue still floating around, suggesting it was recently put there. She picked it up, reading it to herself. Sister, I fear that my decision with our guests may be too quick for one to comprehend. I fear he will act out, lash at me or you with violence. I wish for your advice on this, while I believe it would be great for Ryan to visit Ponyville for a time, DJ will be very unhappy with my decision, and we will lose all progress with him. He will be waking around twenty minutes from when I sent this to your room.

Luna checked the time at the bottom, sent just five minutes ago. She set the letter down, and prepared to meet her sister.

________________

DJ opened his eyes. Something's wrong... He rolled his head, light streaming in through the windows. He sat up in his bed, grabbing for his phone on his nightstand. He checked the clock. "It's almost seven..." He said to himself. He stood from his bed, making his way for the window. He crossed his arms as he began to relive the day's events, and how he was missing an hour. As he pondered an answer, he realized something.

Something that he had taken note of, but never really noticed. The throbbing headache he had been having since day three of football, was gone. The tan lines where his gloves met his wrists, were gone. All the scabs, bruises, cuts, sores, were gone. DJ took in a deep.breath through his nostrils. And smiled.

No longer was he in constant pain, it had all subsided, and for the first time since arriving in Equestria, his vision wasn't cloudy. "Today, well, tonight, may just get better..." He said to himself.

Then, in the distance, DJ heard a familiar sound. A small, four cylinder engine, turning over.

He didn't even think about what it was, he already knew. His Lil Red was alive!

He ran down the hallways, pushing maids and royalty out of the way. He knew where his truck was, he had visited it so many times, it was almost like visiting a loved one in a hospital. When DJ finally made it to thw door, he threw it open, running straight towards the red S10. The scientists all looked to DJ in fear.

"It did it! Not us!" They screamed, obviously thinking the engine's whine was an incorrect noise.

DJ pulled his good set of keys from his pocket, discarding the spare that was currently in the ignition. He pushed it in, and turned them. The engine roared to life.

DJ smiled as he gripped the steering wheel with both hands. Somehow, he had a full tank of gas, and all the other needles were pointing exactly where they are designed. One of the scientists knocked on the window.

"We are opening the doors to the gardens!" He screamed.

DJ gave a nod, before pulling a lever under the dash, disengaging the parking break, and pulling it into drive. When the doors were open enough, DJ slammed on the gas, flying straight into the gardens. He found his way through the semi maze, eventually reaching an open field.

DJ's foot never left the floor, flinging the Equestrian mud flying through the air, and tire marks where he had been. The truck's engine whined and whined and whined some more, begging for a break. Begging to be back on pavement, going a simple thirty-five mile an hour. But DJ couldn't resist.

Eventually, DJ stopped the vehicle, smiling, for some reason breathing heavily, and the happiest he had been since arriving in Equestria. He looked around, and saw a familiar someone.

She knocked on the window. "You got 'er runnin'?" Ryan asked.

DJ rolled the window down. "I didn't, I haven't touched her in a while. But yeah. She's alive!"

Ryan bit her lip, and tapped the window. "DJ, there's something we need to talk about..."

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Princess Celestia..." she swallowed. "She wants me to go to Ponyville to teach Twilight about our culture."

"You know damn well I'm not letting you leave my sight." DJ said. He wasn't going to let anything happen to Ryan, and when he wasn't with her, in a strange place, something could.

"She said you didn't want to g..."

"Of course I don't want to go there. But, I know you obviously do."

Ryan raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to force me to stay here?"

DJ frowned. "No? I'm just going to have to follow you."

Ryan started smiling. "You're coming then!"

Fuck me... "Yup."

Ryan leaned through the window into the truck. "We leave tomorrow!"

God fucking dammit... "Okay, I'll get my money from the bank."

Ryan smiled. "Already did!"

"Wait..." before DJ could process what was just said, Ryan was gone. DJ rolled up his windows, allowing the 5% tint to hide him from the world. He put his hands on his head and leaned back. "What the hell did I get myself into..." As he drug his hands down, he noticed a lack of something.

A lack of a metallic scrape on his face. DJ opened his eyes, and looked at his fingers.

A super tan, compressed, spot on his finger in place where his ring should be. DJ's eye twitched. His blood began to boil, and he already knew how he was going to kill the bitch that stole it.

________________

*DEEP IN THE EVERFREE*

Black lust sat behind her desk, surrounded by guards and prisoners. The old castle, once belonging to the Equestrian sisters, now hers. She leaned back, admiring the architecture. Her dark crimson eyes scanning every detail. Until a large crashing drew away her attention.

A grey unicorn walked forward, a smirk plastered on his face. Lust felt a frown growing. "Who are you! And what are you doing in my castle!"

The unicorn stopped. "I come, bearing gifts." He said. A small brown bag floating to the desk.

Lust examined the bag, before taking the contents out. A small silver ring, with a blue gem. "What is this!"

"Surely you have heard of the demon that has infected Canterlot?" Lust gazed up from the ring to the unicorn. "That is its ring."

"A demon's, you say..." Lust didn't know what to think, she leaned back in her cushion. "And why bring this object, containing so much hate, to mt domain?"

"This ring has little value in terms of wealth. However." The unicorn stepped further. "Do you know how the demon came to Equestria in the first place?" Lust shook her head. "Portals!"

"What are you getting at?"

"This demon, hates Celestia. And so do I, and you. But none of us can do anything about it." The unicorn motioned to the ring. "So why not a new demon? One that is not bound by watchful eyes?"

"So you want to bring another unholy creature, into mt palace, and let it roam free?" Lust smiled. "I like it!" She looked up as the unicron was leaving. "Wait! What is your name?"

The unicorn smiled as he walked through the door. "We bring the demon in, then you know. I am off to get scholars, ones who have enough power amd knowledge to open the portal. Celestia's reign, is over."

Breaching's a new life

Celestia pulled the blinders over her eyes, and receeded into her matress. She was ready for Luna's night to carry her away into the beautiful world of sleep. She took in a deep breath, before clearing her mind of all the past month's events. Trying as hard as she could to calm her tense nerves on how DJ was reacting to Ryan's move. It had been two whole days, and still no word from either of them. She gad at least expected Ryan to send her a letter, seeing as she had no grudge against her.

But she pushed it out of her mind. Relaxing as much as possi...

"Halt! In t..." *THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK THUNK*

Celestia sat straight up in her bed at the sound of royal guard's armor being crushed. She heard moans of pain from the other side of the door. Then, four loud bangs on the door. "Let me in dammit!" Screamed a familiar voice.

Celestia raised the lock on her door, and opened it with her magic. A dark figure approached the bed. In full padding, a shotgun in his hand.

His ring, firmly in place, caked with orange paint, and red blood.

"We have a problem." He said, as a purple unicorn walked up beside DJ.

Celestia squinted. "Twilight?"

Just as she looked back to DJ, more figures started to appear. First one, then five, then ten of the most pissed off humans Equestria has ever seen were standing in the archway, in camo gear, guns dangling from their hands, bloodshot eyes.

And growling stomachs.

__________________________________

*Two days earlier*

Twilight tapped her foot out of anxiety and exitement as the train pulled into the station. She looked over to her friends. "See if you can see her." Twilight said.

The ponies all smiled amd nodded, dissecting the crowd with their eyes as Rainbow and Fluttershy flew overhead. But, as the station cleared out, there was no sign of the female human. Twilight frowned and looked at Spike, who gave a shrug. "The letter said noon."

Twilight brought her hoof to her chin. Maybe she got off on the wrong stop? Maybe she's asleep? A tap on the shoulder brought her back to reality. She looked over to see Rarity pointing into the distance. "What's that?"

Twilight strained her eyes, and saw the oddity. A red square was coming towards them, over the rolling hills, a loud whine when it tried to climb. Twilight recognized the square, as the truck.

DJ's truck.

As it bounced and got closer, she noticed bags bouncing in the back, along with Ryan's bike that was tied down using multi-colored stretchy cords. When it pulled up, it was obvious DJ wasn't the one who got to choose the song being played, as a deep man's voice filled the air, instead of bass or electric guitars.

The truck bounced over that tracks, then slowly made its way towards the large tree in the center of town. Rainbow flew down beside Twilight. "I thought just Ryan was coming?"

"So did I." Twilight said as she frowned and started towards her home, which in the front yard held a quarter ton vehicle, a hundred pound angel, and two hundred pound devil.

_________________________

DJ pushed down on the brake, and shut off the engine. "Are you sure this is it?" Ryan asked, looking up at the massive tree.

"Ry, I've loathed this show for years now. I think I know what the main character's house looks like." DJ replied as he threw open the door, unloading the bags onto the ground.

Ryan got out of the truck, looking around. She noticed a lot of looks. Fear, cofusion, and curiosity. She looked to DJ as he got to the bike. "Need help?"

"Please." He said, rolling it to the end of the bed. As they started unloading, DJ heard hooves behind him, he glanced back to see the all too familiar purple unicorn leading the pack. An unhappy look on her face. But before he could speak, a cyan pegasus flew into his face.

"What are you doing here?"

DJ looked back, bowing up, and sticking his nose just an inch from hers. "Whatever the fuck I want."

A hand came in fast and hard, making solid contact with the back of DJ's skull, but in a way that didn't push his face straight forward, but to the side. "DJ! Language!" Ryan belted our as she propped her bike against the tree. She put her hand on DJ and Rainbows' s chest. "Let's all calm down, and let me explain."

_________________________________

*Ten kilometers away, Everfree forest*

Lust stared at the red door, the ring sitting on top, the markings on the floor, and the circle of stones, each with its own unicorn for power. Their portal would be different then Celestia, Luna, and Cadence's. Instead of just the tear in space, they would allow a pre-existing tear to re-open. The door, serving as the tear, alone is just another door. But when powered, it finds a, or all, the previous tears, within a proximity. Bending them into the general location, and from there, the ring directs where the open end of the tear ends up.

The unicorn walked next to Lust. "This thing, are you sure you will be able to contain it?"

Lust grunted. "If we can't, then we don't deserve it. It shouldn't be too hard. From what you said, it's fast and strong, but weak against magic." The unicorn nodded, before studying the items. "What's your name?" Lust asked.

The unicorn raised an eyebrow. "I have many, why are you so curious about it?"

"I don't like referring to ponies as 'you'. I like to have a name."

The unicorn nodded. "That's a fair enough reason. My name is Red. And yes, I am not the color red. But that is my name."

Before Lust could respond, a noise caught her attention. A small line of smoke started to trail towards the door. "The tears are converging!" A unicron yelled. "Everypony to your stations!"

As the ponies scurried to their spots, the wind picked up, and Lust was starting to regret the idea. What if they couldn't hold it? What if it got out? But on the other hand, what if they captured it. Detained it. As the stones and ring started floating, her nervousness was showing to everypony.

Then, the door was engulfed in a bright blue light, from the gem in the ring, and the handle on the door shaking. Then, in a second, the door flew open, and four small balls flew through. With each one, a different color smoke. The ponies looked down as the smoke filled the room.

Lust looked away from the smoke balls just long enough to see red lasers start cutting through the smoke. And, in one booming voice, multiple demons screamed "Get on the fucking floor!"

__________________________

*Five minutes prior, Lake Thunderbird, Oklahoma*

Kendrick hit the ground as the paint balls flew over his head. He looked to Corben as he popped open another container to fill his hopper. "Who's bright idea was it for it to be coaches versus players?"

Corben shrugged. "It wouldn't be so bad, but Davidson's trigger finger is fucking isane. And he's a deer, have you seen him go from cover to cover?"

Kendrick grunted. "Barely." He peaked his head around the corner barely, already attracting multiple shots. "We need to regroup."

"Agreed." Corben said, reaching into his bag.

"You have a lighter, right?"

Corben looked over, and even though a mask was worn, you could still see the 'are you fucking kidding m?' Look on his face. He pulled out the small rocket, lit it, and let it fly. "Alright, we all meet back at the trail. We should be able to flank them at their camp from there.

*A regroup and quick jog later*

Then ten remaining player slowly walked up to the abandoned lake house, now used as Coach Base. They crept up to the front door, stacking five on each side. Tyler looked to Corben. "What else you got to breach?"

Corben sighed. "All I gots is smoke. Everyone still has their lasers from our night run, right?"

Everyone nodded, except for a single person. "No, why would I keep that on?"

Freddy looked behind him. "Shelby, shut the fuck up, no one cares." Followed by muffled laughs.

Corben took the smoke grenades in his hands. "Alright, you guys ready?" Everyone nodded. "Alright, three... two..." he lit the fuses. "One..." he threw the door open, tossing in the grenades. "Wait a few for the room to fill...... and go!" Corben switched on his laser, and kicked the door in with his foot. The grenades had done their job, the room was completely smoked out, but he could make out living shadows. Then in onw voise, the playeds screamed "Get on the fucking floor!"

Idea Recall

As the players moved into the room, the red lasers fixed on the multiple targets began to fade as more and more smoke left the small grenades. Kendrick let out a loud cough, then looked for Corben. "Jesus, I thought those things only put out a little smoke?"

"Enough to fill a room, and I tossed a couple." He replied, pulling his trigger, painting his target.

A laugh rang out through the room, causing the players to stop. "Alright, which of you cunts was it with the creepy laugh?" Michael said, grinding his teeth.

"I'll bet it was Smith." Matt said, rapidly pulling his triggers. "Fuck you, Smith!"

"Hey, asshat, that's me!" Shelby screamed as the balls impacted his side. He looked down to see none had left their orange tint. "What the hell?"

"Dammit, Matt!" Trevor screamed. "Did you freeze yours again?"

Matt turned his head. "No one sa..." He was cut off by a booming voice.

"Enough!" A large gust of wind flowed into the room, slamming the door, and doing away with the smoke. All lasers pointed to the source.

The player's mouths all dropped under their masks, save one smile. Then a frown. Corben pointed at Colton. "Dammit! We said no drugs, and you go and put some in my sandwich!"

"Wait, I'm not the only one seeing a black horse with a glowy pointy dildo on its head?" Trevor asked, lowering his guard a bit.

"Wow... it's beauti..."

"Shelby, I swear to God, finish that word and I will break your neck."

Then, among the chaos, the voice boomed again. "Silence!" All lasers went back to the source.

"Did it just talk?" Matt whispered.

"Now... you may be wondering why I have summoned you, demons."

"Yeah, hey, you sure he didn't slip us something?" Tyler replied.

"The reason is. I have seen your kind before. You are fast, strong, violent, and smart."

A muffled laugh filled the room. "Not Shelby! Bitch is slow, weak, fat and the biggest dumbass around!"

The room filled with laughs and "We're just fuckin' with ya."

"You may not know this, but, currently, our county of Equestria is being ruled by a ponyz n by the name o..."

"Of Princess Celestia." Kendrick spoke up. All eyes turned to him. "And from wanting demons, I can assume you want her out?"

The black horse smiled. "You pick up on things quick."

"Yes. Now, we'll do it. By my way."

"The hell we won't!" Dustin screamed.

Kendrick looked back, and whispered "Trust me on this." He hesitated, then finally nodded.

"Your way?"

Kendrick looked back to the black horse. "Yes. We strike today. Right where it will hurt Celestia the most."

"Canterlot?"

Kendrick shook his head. "Ponyville, the home of her student."

_______________________

DJ stared straight into Rainbow's eyes. Both with looks that could kill. Not moving. Not blinking. Barely breathing. Ryan was sat down with Twilight, explaining why he had decided to come along.

"He already said he would sleep in the bed of his truck, he he could borrow a blanket." Ryan said.

Applejack rubbed the back of her head. "Shoot... I know he's mean an' all... but that 'bed' of his is made of metal."

Ryan shrugged. "Says he's slept in worse places."

Before Twilight could speak, a shriek filled the room. "That's cheating!" Rainbow said, pointing a hoof at DJ's face.

"Because you didn't think of it first makes it cheating?" DJ asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You blew into my eye!"

"Wouldn't be so easy if they weren't so damn big." DJ said as he stood up. "Where's the closest coffee shop?" He asked.

Pinkie startimed jumping. "Maybe, instead of coffe, you could come to sugarcube corner and get a cupcake! Maybe that won't make you such a grumpy pants!"

"Coffee... straight, black, no sugar, no cream, no cupcake icing. Just straight black coffee. Where can I get some?"

Twilight rubbed her chin. "There's an herb store in town that sells beans, I'm not sure of any place that sells plain coffee."

DJ nodded his head before he walked out the door. Fluttershy looked to Ryan. "Why is he so 'grumpy'?" She asked, hiding behind her hair.

"It's rude and barbaric the way he acts!" Rarity shrieked.

Ryan kinda frowned. "He's just scared."

"Scared!" Rainbow screamed, flying into Ryan's face. "Explain the Gala, when he tried to scare every pony in there! And you tell us he's scared?!"

"Really, he is overreacting to this." Ryan said. "But, I have got him to calm down a lot. But if you think about it, he was alone for a month. If I would have been here, he wouldn't be nearly this scared. Trust me." Ryan smiled. "Once you get under his thick outer layer, he is one of the sweetest guys out there."

Rainbow waved her hoof at Ryan. "First you tell us he's scared, then sweet? What next?"

Ryan smiled. "Don't believe me?" She reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone. "Our phone, can record video and audio. For my birthday, he stole my phone and made this." All the ponies gathered to watch the device.

It started out looking down, at a pair of cleats on a plastic green field. "Oh, sh..... I hit rec...." the video blurred as the camera was swung around to DJ's face. A warm smile. "Hey Ry! You'll probably kill me for stealing your phone, and are on your way if you know how to activate the 'find my phone', but check this out real fast!" The camera blurred again as it aimed towards a bench. A bouquet of flowers, a couple movies, a card, and a pair of boots. "Now, because I'm headed to Texas to see a few old friends.... yes, it's Wil and Lexi and them, but hey! Anyway, these are going to be in my locker. The combo is 36-12-0. You won't actually know about this video though, until the alarm I set goes off..... or you go into your videos. Anyway, I think I just saw your mom's Ford on the road, so I best scurry off before she gets suspicious! Love ya!"

Ryan looked from the black screen to see Rarity, Fluttershy, Twilight, and Applejack making 'awwww' faces, while Pinkie wept in a pool of happy tears, and Rainbow just hovered with her hooves crossed.

"So where's that DJ?" She asked.

As Ryan prepared to open her mouth, DJ opened the door, holding in his hands his shotgun. "Hey, forest is no bueno for kids right?"

__________________

"Just admit it! We're lost!" Sweetie Belle said. "Again!"

"We ain't lost! I know where we are!" Applebloom replied. "Zecoras' is just up here!"

Scootaloo sighed. "I sure hope this is the right way."

The girls nodded in agreement, then all at oncd stopped, when something caught their eye.

In the middle of a small opening, was a red dot on the forest floor. It was bright, and almost shaky. The girls got closer to examine it. "What is it?" Sweetie asked.

"I haven't got a clue!" Applebloom said, reaching her hoof out to grab the red thing. But when she got close to it, it jumped onto her. The girls were still, and so was the dot. "It... doesn't feel like anything!" Applebloom said with a smile.

"Look!" Scootaloo said, pointing to the ground, as two more lasers red things appeared, moving onto the girls. "You're right! It's like they're not even there!"

The girls started laughing at the dots, as more and more formed and reached out to them, until each girl had three on them. "What are they?" Sweetie asked, trying to pick them up, only for them to just appear on top of her hoof.

_________________

Kendrick felt a bead of sweat forming on his brow. He felt a tap on his shoulder, he turned to see Trevor with a concerned look on his face. "Alright..." he whispered. "You need to explain. Now." He said sternly.

Kendrick sighed, looking back into the open field with the laughing foals. "Alright. Like I said, we are in a fictional world called 'Equestria.' Those three, are Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Apple Bloom."

"Damn your gay..." Corben threw in, his bead training on Scootaloo's temple.

Kendrick rolled his eyes. "Anyway, since these three are here, we aren't far from Ponyville. We can get help there."

"But you told that Black bitch that we would take the student hostage?" Tyler asked.

"Really? Think I was serious when I decided to take a fucking god'sfavorite student?" Kendrick glared at Tyler. "We go in, get her, and get out. Assuming that we aren't really on drugs."

Shelby swallowed nervously. "Guys... I took something back there..."

"God.... dammit..." Dustin said. "What did you take!"

Shelby held out his hand. "Lookit."

Colton reached out to try and grab whatever was in Shelby's hand. But in doing so, he fell over. Snapping multiple twigs. Kendrick's heart stopped as the three girls all looked to the source of the lasers. The three, with fearful eyes but curious minds started slowly walking towards the players. Matt turned to Colton, unloading fifteen shots into his back. "You cocksuck!"

Kendrick's elbow landed in Matt's groin, causing him to fall to the floor. "Dude! Shut up!" He turned back to the opening, only to be face to face with a small orange pegasus. "Please don't panic..." He said, behind his skull painted mask.

The sound of three screaming girls rang through the player's ears.

Meet the blue team

"Shut up!" Corben yelled as he reached over, picking up the three foals. "Jesus! You'll blow my ears out!"

"Corben!" Kendrick screamed, pulling his mask off. "You have you have to be calm with them, or they'll freak out more."

"Just get them to shut up!" Tyler screamed over the high pitch shrieks.

Corben reached into his back pocket, pulling out a match and a roll of blackcats. "I got this." He said, igniting the match and firecrackers, and throwing them into the field. The dozens of explosions brought silence to the girls, now frozen in fear of the creatures.

"Put 'em down." Kendrick said, getting on a knee. Corben complied and gently set the three foals on the ground. "Sweetie Belle.... Scootaloo.... Apple Bloom...."

'How do ya know our names?" Apple Bloom whimpered.

"We're....." Kendrick looked around, for some kind of inspiration to feed a lie off of. "We are the Blues... We're your... guardian humans."

"You've got to be ki..." Trevor was cut off by a palm to the back of the head.

"Dude, shut up." Kenny said, holding his finger to his lips.

Corben smiled. "Oh, there's Kenny! Couldn't see him with his eyes closed!"

"Racist fuck." Kenny said with a smile, pulling his mask off. "I have a joke for you too."

Kendrick sighed. "Do we really have to do this now?"

"You know why you got all that hair?"

Corben shrugged. "Go for it."

"It's so you can hide that tiny pecker of yours!"

The forest filled with a chorus of 'Ohhhhhh shiiiiit!'

"Guys! Little girls here!" Kendrick said, trying to hold back a smile. He turned back to the three girls. "Don't listen to them, okay? They're crazy."

The three nodded, and looked around. "So... you're not gonna eat us?"

Kendrick smiled. "No, we're not gonna eat you."

"Hey, asshat." Jose started. "It's getting dark, and we all know from that hunting trip, shit goes down at night."

Kendrick sighed. "Alright, do you three know the way back to Ponyville?"

They shook their heads. "We were headed t' Zecora's."

"Do you know where that is?"

"Well... we thought we did."

Kendrick let out a sigh. "Alright, let's just see if we can't find any landmarks." Kendrick stood up, pulling his mask down. "Corben, there room in your bag?"

"For what?"

"For them. No reason they should walk any more than they got to."

Corben sighed. "Yeah, I got room." He set the bag on the ground, and opened it. "Enough for the lot of ya, and no, I won't zip it up on ya."

"Wait... we don't even know your names yet!" Sweetie Belle said.

Corben sighed again. "I'm Corben. That there's Kendrick, behind him is Tyler, Matt, Shelby, Dustin, Trevor, and Kenny. Then behind me is Jose and Shawn."

"Do you work together?"

Shawn got down on a knee. "We can socialize later, right now, we got to go."

Tyler nodded to Corben. "Hey, why don't you pop off the ol' blue yellow and white rockets? Maybe someone will see it?"

"A dragon, Tyler. A dragon would see it before anything." Kendrick stated as they started walking in the direction the girls would point.

"Alright, now we know you watch the show, bu..."

Kendrick made a slicing motion at his throat. "What. Show...?" He then nodded to Corben, who looked as if his head would explode with the three girls in his bag.

"Oh, yeah. Right. Anyway, how do you know a dragon would see it first? Surely one of the bigger orange horses would see it? And I'm sure Corb brought some Excals."

Kendrick rubbed his chin. "Good point, with these three missing, they mist likley have the pegasi flying overhead..." Kendrick looked to Corben. "Eyo! Go ahead and launch 'em!"

__________________

"We've been walking foooooreeeeverrrrrr." Rarity moaned, giving a hatefilled look to DJ, who plowed ahead with his shotgun shouldered.

"Stop bitching. Want to find your sister or not?"

"Do you even know where you're going?" Twilight asked, frowing at DJ' language.

"Yes." He replied, grinding his teeth.

"How could you POSSIBLY know where we're going in the Everfee?" Rainbow asked, flying right behindDJ.

DJ pointed at the ground. "Three sets of hoofprints heading South enough evidence for you?"

"How do you know that's their prints?" Fluttershy asked, in almost a whisper.

"Red fuzz from a bow every now and again, and I saw an orange feather a little ways back." DJ said as he followed the prints into an open area. "Alright, if you want, we can rest here. Or we can power..." DJ trailed off as something caught his eye. "Through........" He slowly made his way yo the edge of the opening. He got down on a knee, and picked something out of the dirt.

Twilight walked up behind him while the others.rested.their hooves. "What is that?"

DJ brought it up to his nose, and took a deep sniff. "They're...... Blackcats...?" He said, feeling the casing. "Fired off not too long ago."

"Blackcats?"

DJ looked back to Twilight. "Super low explosive. Hurts like hell if you forget how short the fuse really is." He looked up, and frowned even more. "What the fuck...?" He took a few steps forward, running his fingers through the dirt. The orange dirt.

"Is that.... blood?"

DJ shook his head. "Paint...?" He reached down, picking up a dirt covered orange ball. "Paintballs?"

"What are paintballs?"

"Not supposed to be here." He said. Then, a loud explosion rang through the forest. DJ stood up, pointing at Raibow. "Hey, Bandicoot! Fly up and tell me what you see."

"Wh..."

"Just fucking do it." DJ said, his voice on edge.

Twilight look to DJ as Rainbow flew through the forest canopy. "Bandicoot?"

"Yeah. Crash Bandicoot." DJ said with a smile.

"That's not funny..." Twilight said, giving DJ a death glare.

"You're right, it's hilarious." DJ said as another explosion rang through the forest. Followed by Rainbow flying flying back through the trees.

"There was a bright blue light!" Rainbow said.

DJ's face fell as he clenched the explosives and orange ball. "No...... nononono...." he whispered to himself. He looked up to Rainbow. "Which was was it?"

___________________

"And mortar's up. Now, we set up camp." Corben said, placing the metal tube back in his bag.

"Camp?" Applebloom asked, a worried look on her face. "But what 'bout Zecora's?

"Once we launch the mortars, we have to stay put. Or it's pointless." Corben said, as he and the rest of the group took off their masks and gear.stripping down to the shorts and Tee's underneath.

"Oh..." the girls all said at once.

"Hey, if you girls want to help, mind grabbing rocks and sticks?" Tyler asked.

"Seriously Tyler?" Kendrick asked. He turned to thw girls. "Y'all just stay put." He said.

Shawn looked around. "Alright guys, I know we've done this before. But just to pass the time alright?"

"Dammit Shawn..." Kenny said. "Yeah, alright."

"Okay, if you could fuck anyone in the world, who would it be?"

"Katy Perry, hands down." Corben said, getting out his large lighter and firestarter.

"Probably that bitch from the song 'Good Time' or some shit like that."

"Rihanna, from the scene in 'Where have you been' where she's in the desert, with the fucking bandana." Trevor said.

"Yeah, remember that game? Where you find the hottest picture, showing the least amount of skin as possible? Didn't that one win?" Kenny asked.

"No, I think that one came in second." Shawn pointed out. "The first I thought was of... oh what's her tits..."

"Taylor Swift?"

"There ya go!"

"Hey guys, I just realized something." Kendrick said, throwing his sticks on the pile. "We don't have any food, do we?"

"Well... actually..." Shelby started.

"Shelby, you beautiful son of a bitch. If you have food I will love you forever." Colton said, eyeing the lineman.

"I brought cans of chili."

Colton ran over to Shelby, tackling his to the ground. "You sexy bastard! I love you! I love you so much!"

Kendrick froze. "Guys..."

"I'm never going to make you do the truffle shuffle ever again!"

"Tyler.... Grab your knife..." Kendrick said, and he slowly reached for his.

Tyler turned as he started to pull out his knife, something he never even knew existed. A lion, with wings, and a scorpion tail. "Fuck..." he said. "I knew I should have brought my rifle just in case."

"It was paintball. You didn't know." Kendrick said, staring down the beast. None of the others had taken notice yet, as they were too busy laughing at Colton love Shelby."

"Wha'do we do?"

Kendrick rolled his shoulders. "Hope for the best."

"We're dead aren't we?"

Kendrick gave a nod. "We all are."

"Then, I just want you to know..... you're a horrible lead blocker."

Kendrick smiled. "And you have no hands."

Day for making some Z's

Corben gave a loud laugh as the fire turned into a decent blaze. "Ha! We're Survivormaning the shit out of this forest!"

"Survivorman doesn't use matches and explosives." Dustin pointed out as he forced the lid off the chili can.

"I don't give a fuck!" Corben said. "Hey Kendrick, ch... THE FUCK IS THAT?!" Corben screamed, pointing towards Tyler and Kendrick.

The girls all gasped. "A manticore!" Scootaloo screamed.

The players by the fire slowly started to reassemble their guns, trying to make the *pssssst* of air from the gun’s tanks when screwed on as silent and quick as possible.

"Are we shooting it?" Dustin asked in a whisper, as Kendrick and Tyler danced their blades in the air, keeping the beast's head on a motion path.

"Not yet." Shawn said, pulling his gun's safety off.

"Maybe he ha-" Sweetie Belle started.

"Kid, be quiet." Corben said, his hand running over the laser.

The laser!

Corben looked to Kendrick and Tyler. "I'll get it closer, and you shank it." He whispered.

"How do you plan on doing that?" Kendrick asked all the while sweat formed on his brow.

"It's a cat, and I have a laser pointer. That is a pretty damn good plan." Corben said, as he turned his laser on, pointing it at the ground just inches from the manticore.

Receiving an instant result.

The manticore got down in a stance that resembled a playful kitten. Its tail twitched back and forth, wings tight at its side. Corben swung the laser even closer, causing the beast to slam its paw into the dirt where the laser was. Corben quickly moved the laser closer towards the group, but only a little.

Kendrick looked to Tyler. "What do we do about the stinger?"

The manticore pounced onto the laser, two yards away from Kendrick. Causing him to slightly tremble. "You know... just..."

"I need an answer, man!"

Kendrick looked at the giant stinger swinging back and forth on the ground, the thought of the poison shooting through his veins sent shivers down his body. "Just..."

Dustin started shifting back and forth. "We are so boned..."

The manticore again pounced on the laser, just a foot away from Kendrick. It saw his foot, and slowly looked up, a rumble coming from deep inside its stomach. A growing roar, that would lead to death.

Kendrick closed his eyes, preparing for the blow. "I don't know..."

The beast was about to let out a roar, when it's ears twitched to the left. A snapping twig. It turned in curiosity, to yet another human. A human with a long metal tube pointed straight at its forehead.

"Nighty night, kitty cat."

_______________

DJ's finger inched towards the trigger, ready to blow the brains of the monster across the forest floor. The bead lined up right between the eyes. Right before he could pull the trigger though, a butter yellow pegasus flew in front of his gun.

"You can't hurt him!" She shouted.

"Bullshit, if I don't kill this bastard, then poor Ken-dick is dead."

"Then I'll talk to him." Fluttershy said. Turning towards the beast. "Hey there, little guy."

"Little my ass." DJ said, sights still trained on its head.

The beast glared at Fluttershy, before its eyes widened. It picked up the pegasus, and gave a warm smile. Starting to purr, it gave a large lick to her head.

"You've got to be shitting me." Kendrick said, dropping his knife back in its place.

"Is that the one that had the thorn in its paw?" Twilight asked, moving a little closer.

"Uh-huh, and he was just a little hungry."

"Nope," Corben said, standing up. "I'm not about to be dinner."

The beast gave a low growl. Fluttershy nodded, turning to Dustin. "He wants whatever is in the can..."

Dustin looked down at the chili, a tear almost forcing in his eye. "But..."

DJ gave a small cough. "Umm, Dustin. I don't know if you noticed, but this thing could pretty quickly kill and eat you, and the chili. Just give up the chili."

Dustin looked down once again, before holding it out. Twilight then used her magic to grab the can, and hand it to the manticore, which licked its chomps and left the camp with the chili in tow.

DJ rubbed his fingers through his hair, then looked to Tyler. "Now, tell me... how the fuck did you get here?!”

Shelby stood up, stretching out his back. "Well, some bitch with a dildo strapped to her head said something about killing a princess."

All the ponies let out a loud gasp. "You're going to kill Princess Celestia?!" Twilight screamed.

"I guess, that's what she said." Shelby said with a shrug.

"Shelby?" Trevor looked behind him.

"Yeah?"

"When are you going to learn to keep your mouth shut?"

"He asked!" He cried out, pointing at DJ. "I don't even know who this guy is!"

DJ frowned. "Good point, Kendrick, who the hell is that?"

"His name is Shelby. Moved here... well... to Noble, about a month ago." He glanced to Tyler. “Supposedly the strongest lifter in Lawton.”

DJ smiled. "Is this like Dobby's story? Second string the whole year, come in championship game for game winning touchdown?"

The forest erupted in laughter. "Hey, remember! 'Gotta keep going! Gotta keep going!'"

Rarity gasped when she saw Sweetie in the bag. "Sweetie! Have these ruffians hurt you?" She said, as she and the rest of the six ran to the bag.

"Yes, we ate their livers." Colton said, rolling his eyes.

Rainbow frowned. "I really didn't like one of them, now there's twelve."

Kendrick sighed and looked at his watch. "Well, doesn't matter if you like us or not, fact of the matter is, it's getting dark. And there is no way we are finding Zecora's or getting out of the forest tonight."

"So, looks like we're off to sleep soon!" Corben said. "DJ, you got the gun, you got guard duty."

"Horse shit! Make the newbie!" He said, pointing at Shelby.

"I don't know who you think you are," Shelby started, moving towards DJ. "but you're not just going to push me around like dirt."

DJ just smiled. "Go on." He gave a nod to Corben, mouthing 'get 'em'

"You're not just gonna bully me around! Okay?!"

"Okay."

"So! Yeah! Umm... well..." Shelby rubbed the back of his head. "I wasn't expecting it to be that easy."

DJ set his gun on the ground. "It isn't."

"Huh?"

DJ held up his hand, catching a pair of black boxing gloves. "You're new here. Assuming I'm the first one you've mouthed off to like that, I get to find out where you rank."

Tyler and Kendrick smiled. "Oh, hey! I forgot about this! Been years since we got a new guy!"

"Where I rank?" Shelby repeated as Corben slipped the gloves on his hands.

"Oh yeah. You see, in our FASST program, we have the strength index, and speed index. But, that doesn't really give a power and quickness index." DJ raised his fists up. "So, we came up with something to help do that; we box."

"Box?" Shelby asked, noticing a circle of men forming around them.

"Yup. Oh, I almost forgot..." DJ smiled. "Ding ding, bitch." DJ immediately landed a right hook on Shelby's jaw, sending him to the ground.

"What's going on?!" Twilight screamed, just peeking through as DJ's padded fist made contact.

Colton sighed. "Still trying to wake up, or sober up." He smiled and looked at Twilight. "Fifty bucks says you're really a squirrel."

Twilight frowned, then stepped into the circle. "DJ! Why did you do that?"

"Sparkly, move. This is our turf." DJ said, waiting for Shelby to stand back up. "What's wrong? Right now you're pretty low on the totem pole."

Shelby stood up. "Oh yeah? What about now!" Shelby swung his left arm, trying to land a hit on DJ's temple. DJ moved back a step, letting Shelby lose his balance, then landed two more shots in his gut, knocking the breath out of him.

"You know, you can stop if you want?" DJ asked.

"Yeah... alright..." Shelby said, taking off the gloves. "I got guard duty..."

DJ nodded. "Good, I knew you'd see it my way."

As DJ removed his gloves, and looked down to Twilight, who had a bewildered look on her face. "Your harmony bullshit doesn't work with us."

__________________

Lust watched the final blows, and cringed. Her guards walked up beside her. "What are we doing here?" One asked.

"Watching. Remember, the reason they wanted to attack Ponyville was for the student. There she is. Let's see how they act now."

"What are we watching for?"

"Compassion. If they give any to the student, we will know the demons tried to deceive us."

"And what will we do?"

"We put them to sleep, and bring them back to the castle. All of them." Lust said, looking back to the camp, just as the one with the skull mask started talking to Twilight.

"Is that what we're looking for?"

"Exactly what we are looking for." Lust said, giving a frown.

"Just put them to sleep?"

Lust shook her head. "No. Make them dream. But not just dream, connect their dreams. One large dreamscape. And make it a nightmare. The worst place any of them has ever been. It doesn't matter which mind it comes from, just be sure it is the worst scenario possible."

The guards saluted. "Yes Ma'am!" They said, before their horns ignited. A green mist eventually emitting from the tips, and flowing towards the camp. There was no struggle, the bodies just went limp, falling over in deep sleep. Then a blue mist came from the horns, connecting the dreams. Then a red.

Finding the nightmare.

Lust looked to the guards. "And? Where is the nightmare set?"

"Some group of islands, called 'Taviana."

Lust smiled. "Sweet nightmares."

______________________

DJ heard a pounding on his door. "DJ! Dude, get up!"

DJ pulled the pillow over his head. "Fuck off!"

"We have a problem! A big fucking problem!"

"What?" DJ asked, sitting straight up in his bed. "What is so fu..cking....... important......." DJ looked around the small room, recognizing the pictures and padlock on the door. "What the hell?" He stood up, and towards the padlock. He pressed the '1' button four times, and slowly opened the door. He looked around. "Ah shit..."

"DJ! What the fuck are we doing in Taviana?"

"How the fuck should I know?" DJ rocked back on his heels, sticking his hands in his pockets. He felt a small piece of paper. He frowned, and pulled it out. "Huh, my map."

"Yeah, from what I can tell, this is our server? All our cars are here. The Huey, Praga, Limos, Urals, all that shit."

DJ opened the map. His eyes getting wide. "Wake everyone else up!"

"Why?"

DJ put the map back in his pocket, and opened his bag, fishing out his SA-58V ACOG. "I just looked, and I can see who is on the island. It's us four, Shelby, Colton, Trevor, Dustin, Kenny, Jose, and every one of the girls."

Kendrick's eyes got big. "Even the kids?"

DJ nodded. "Even the kids. We can figure out what happened later, how we got here, and you in Equestria. But right now, I don't know what will happen if they die. I don't think they'll respawn."

Kendrick nodded. "We need to move."

"You get Tyler, I'll get Corben." DJ said, chambering a round. "Be sure we all have flares, blood, morphine, and bandages. And carry at least six mags, if we run into Patient Zero, I want him dead."

"Got it."

DJ grabbed his radio from the limo. "Alright, I'm low on fuel, I'm going to head straight to Branibor, and just pass Mitro. Tyler, take the Praga to Mitro, Corben and Kendrick, get the East and SouthEast part of the island. Assume the server just restarted, so watch for the AI Huey."

DJ recieved a chorus of "Gotcha!" And vehicles firing up. DJ gripped the wheel tight. "How the hell..." He said to himself. "Did we end up in DayZ?"

"There isn't a chance they are in Sector B, is there?" Tyler asked.

"Shouldn't be. Hey, you guys all have food right?"

"Fuck..." Corben said, hopping out of the blue 'shit' Ural. "Almost forgot."

DJ sighed, taking the keys out of the ignition. "Okay, let's check all of our stuff again. This isn't our first search and rescue, I don't know how you're forgetting all the simple stuff." He let out a sigh, looking at his watch. "Guys, we have two hours to blindly find all of them!" DJ pushed the keys back into the ignition. "We'll meet back here, coordinates zero-six-five, two-five-three."

"Look for fresh spawns, we are all hero level two, except Corben, who is a bandit level three." Tyler said.

"I don't think anyone else is going to be with us. But that's a good point, try and talk first." DJ said, as his limo bounded over the bumpy terrain, trying to reach the small road near Vedich.

Variety of the damned

Warning! This chapter may contain spoilers for the game "The Last of Us"!

You have been warned, so don't bitch about it later! (The spoiler is a YouTube link, clicking on play is optional!)

DJ nervously tapped the steering wheel of the limo. He was still two kilometers from Branibor, going over one-twenty on the highway. He knew that with every second the undead could be inching closer to one of the ponies, or his men. And while he was worried about the girls, he feared more for the men.

There were two kinds of people in their group of gamers; those who played DayZ, and those who survive. And as far as DJ knew, only his four man squad, and the two man squad of Colton and Trevor, survived the demanding game.

A crackle from the radio got DJ's attention, reaching over, he picked it up from the seat. "Say again?"

"I said I'm over Mitro, and no signs of movement. Imma set 'er down and see if I can't find anything. Maybe some ammo."

DJ sighed. "That's fine, but remember what we are really looking for."

"Colton and Trevor know what they're doing. They just play on Chernarus and not Tavi."

"I'm talking about the girls," DJ said. "they won't make it through the night alone. Hell, they may not make it through the day." DJ slowed his vehicle as he rounded the bend in the highway. “Hey, I’m getting close to the city guys. I’m gonna see if I can’t see anything.”

As DJ got ready to get out, he stopped. He rubbed the now rather long hairs growing on his chin, and thought about where they really were. Taviana, the biggest shit hole, right next to Equestria. Shaking his head, he decided he should get to work. Leaving behind his radio and grabbing his binoculars, he hopped out of the vehicle. He looked at the city, his heart skipping a beat. Zombies, spawned in. Not just a few, but more than should be. Which meant there was survivors. Plural. Then, DJ watched as their paths and motions changed, from a slow wobbly walk, to a dead sprint around the building. "Fuck!" He screamed, jumping back into the limo, pushing the pedal to the floor.

As he got closer to the city, his grip on the assault weapon got tighter. He wouldn't be able to use the laser, but the small iron sights on top of the ACOG would suffice just fine in the close quarters.

When DJ was in the city, he already saw what aggroed the undead. A butter yellow pegasus, running as fast as she could down the street. Grabbing the handbrake, DJ threw the limo into a tight drift around the corner. DJ started honking the horn of the limo, trying to get the mare’s attention. But instead of turning to the car, Fluttershy just thought it was another threat. She then made the biggest move a Bambi could make.

She ran upstairs, with no weapon.

The zombies hoarded into the building, and even as DJ plowed into half of them, five still made it inside. As DJ was jumping out of the car with his weapon's safety off and clicked to full auto, he heard a scream.

It wasn't a scream of fear, but pain.

DJ ran up the stairs, unloading the magazine into the zombies. He saw the room on his right, where he heard one more of the undead bastards. He rounded the corner, to witness the arm of the zombie raised for another blow. A loud cracking noise from the 7.62 round however, brought the zombie to the floor.

The thrill of blowing a zombie's brains out was quickly stomped out, when DJ looked down. There, whimpering, in immense pain, bleeding, crying, was a stained red pegasus. The noises she made, made DJ go to his knees. As he fished out the bandages, his hand starting shaking more and more. He couldn't take it. (The sounds similar to this scene:

Youtube Video

Starting at 1:08)

DJ crawled to Fluttershy who tried to move away, but broken bones and bleeding sides prevented her. "Shhhhh...." DJ said. "It's okay, hun. I just want to help. This may sting a little." He said, as he tightly wrapped the bandage around her body, stopping the bleeding but causing her to cringe in pain. Her body shaking even more violently at the sights of her own blood on the floor, and the blood on DJ’s shirt. DJ grabbed the antibiotics and painkillers from his bag. "Alright, sweetie. I know these taste bad, but you have to swallow them." He also gotten a water bottle out of his bag. Fluttershy kept her mouth shut, shaking her head at the blood soaked human.

"Please, to prevent infection and stop your pain."

She thought for a moment, then complied. Opening her mouth, DJ gently set each pill on her tongue, then allowed her to swallow with the water. "There we go. Now, can you stand?" DJ asked.

Fluttershy attempted to stand, only to yelp in pain, and drop back onto the floor. Tears of pain running down her face. DJ took out the morphine. "This will sting, okay? I won't lie to you. But it will help your legs. Are you ready?"

Fluttershy looked at the needle, and whispered something to the sense of 'not yet.' DJ nodded. "Whenever you're ready, sweetie."

Fluttershy took a deep breath, and gave a nod. DJ took the pin, and held it over her leg. "Can you tell me about your animals?"

Fluttershy looked confused.

"Tell me about Angel." He said, trying to take her mind off the needle.

"Well... h..." Fluttershy was about to start, when she cringed in pain again, due to the injector shoved in her leg.

"I'm sorry, hunny. But I had to." DJ said, tossing the used pin to the side. "Are you lightheaded?" He asked, looking at the pool of blood.

Fluttershy gave a small nod. "A... a little..."

DJ reached into his bag, grabbing the bag of blood, needle, and tube. "I need to do this, okay? You need to stay awake with me on our way to base, so you can help me look for anyone. Now I'm going to give you a blood transfusion." DJ held out his hand. "Can you give me your hoof? I need to find a vein on you."

Fluttershy slowly extended her hoof into the usually hostile human's hand. DJ gently started pushing fur out of the way, looking for a place for the I.V.. Fluttershy gathered herself, and talked to DJ. "You're... different..."

"I'm not the big meanie you're used to," DJ said, placing the needle in her leg. "I know."

"Why?"

"You're the most innocent thing here right now." DJ said, holding the bag over his head as it quickly drained, much faster than it really would. "You were just attacked by a monster. A brain dead monster. You are hurt, and if I had been any slower, you could have died." DJ continued, trying his best to keep a straight face and stop his body from shaking. "But, I got here in time. And I took them down. And you needed help. So, I was being as calm and nice as possible." DJ said. While in reality, the thing that hit DJ wasn't the fact she was hurt. But her screams. The small cries of pain. DJ had one weak spot, and that was little girls.

DJ couldn’t stand to see little girls in pain. He always felt they had a sense of innocence that no other beings could hold. They didn’t know what they were doing, how they got there. Even though Fluttershy was a full grown mare, she was in his world. Just a few hours old in the constantly hostile environment of DayZ.

DJ looked to Fluttershy. "Did you see any other of your friends?"

Fluttershy shook her head.

DJ sighed. "Alright." DJ ran his fingers through his hair. "You're pretty scared right now, I can see it in your eyes." DJ said, reaching under Fluttershy, picking her up. "But don't worry, I haven’t let a single person in this place die on me." DJ took in a deep breath. "Close your eyes, Fluttershy. You don't want to see this."

"Okay."

Fluttershy squeezed her eyes closed, as DJ walked around the corner. Stepping over mangled and bleeding corpses of the undead. He almost told her to plug her ears as well when he stepped in a large puddle of the red liquid.

DJ walked down the stairs, the pegasus in his arms. He could smell the wet fur from the red liquid. He could feel her heart, racing at a million miles an hour. He could hear her breathing heavily. He could see her eyes darting under her eyelids.

"I'm going to put you in the car, alright? They can't get you there."

Fluttershy turned her head, eyes still sealed shut. "Are you sure?"

DJ gave a warm smile. "Positive."

As DJ opened the door, and sat her down, making sure she didn't see the flattened bodies strung out in the road. Then, he heard a strange noise in the distance. A 'thumping' sound. DJ grabbed his radio. "Tyler, I told you to stay in Mitro."

"I am in Mitro! I was just about to land and pick up Shelby and the pink bitch."

DJ frowned. Then dread and fear washed over his body. He looked up to the sky, as a black Huey turned to face the town. He looked at the scared yellow pegasus, with no clue about the dual M240 mounted flying bringer of death that was closing in on them. DJ started sweating, before he realized that not too far away, was a firehouse.

DJ hopped into the driver's seat, pushing the pedal to the floor. Fluttershy looked concerned in the back seat. "We're going to stop in the fire station for a bit."

"Okay?" DJ rounded the corner, getting closer to the safety spot. The two were just two hundred yards away, when an all too familiar sound of automatic LMG fire started raining down on the limo.

"Stay down!" DJ yelled, as he reached the fire station, the heli circling around for another run. DJ hopped out of the vehicle, trying with all his might to force the second door open. He glanced up, watching the Huey slowly turn around for another run.

He pushed, his whole body straining to open the bright red doors. When the door was open enough for the car to fit inside the building, DJ ran back to the driver’s side of the car. Thankful that he left it running, DJ pulled the vehicle forward, and immediately hopping out again. When the two were safe inside the building, he ran back over to the doors, forcing them shut just as another barrage of bullets impacted the ground a few feet away.

DJ, breathing heavily, sweating, and leaning on the door, closed his eyes.I would rather be in Equestria. There I don't have to worry about getting shot at. He let out a sigh as he looked back to Fluttershy, who peered at him through the back window.

"I think there's a shower somewhere around here." DJ said when he opened the limo door again, grabbing his weapon. "I really don't think you want your fur to be caked red."

She nodded, getting out of the car. She turned to look at DJ. He started pulling things out of the trunk, more magazines. His whole body shaking, all the while Fluttershy’s mind began to wander. ‘Maybe... maybe he isn't so bad.’ Before she could think too deeply on it, a loud clicking noise from an upper level stopped her train of thought.

______________

Colton looked out the window of the upper floor in the ATC tower, his shotgun tucked under his arm. "How long are we going to sit here?"

Trevor sat back in the chair, taking the arrow out of his new crossbow. "We're gonna sit our happy asses here until either the server restarts, we wake up, become sober, or we see someone."

Colton pointed his finger at Trevor. "This is bullshit and you know it!"

"What other choice do we have?"

"I don't know, rig up a car, get a tent, make a base, find a map, guns, chopper, SURVIVE!"

"It took us a week to find a car, let alone get it up and running!" Trevor screamed.

Colton stood up to his full height, which really didn’t so much. The two were almost the same height. "There is a car, literally right below us! And the hangars occasionally spawn car parts!"

Trevor sighed. "Can you just not sit down and..." He cut himself off, holding a fist in the air.

"What is it?" Colton whispered.

"Player." Trevor said, looking down the stairs.

"Do we talk to them?" Colton asked.

Trevor nodded. "Go ahead."

Colton cleared his throat. "Hey! You!"

No reply.

"We know you're down there! We got our sights on the stairs!'

Still no reply. Colton tightened his grip. "Anyone else would have replied." He said.

"Waste 'em." Trevor replied.

Colton slowly made his way down the stairs. His cheek against the weapon. He made it down the first flight, and was preparing to go down the second, when he heard something. Small quick breaths and whispering, though he couldn't make it out.

“Hey!” Colton screamed, his finger inching closer and closer to the trigger. He still received no reply. He started to make his way down the final flight of stairs. Anything that moved, was hostile. Which is a good reason the three children were frozen in fear.

Colton lowered his gun, looking at the three foals. a voice came from above. “And?’

Colton sighed. “False alarm.” He looked down. “Just a couple of the drugs from before still sticking around.”

Trevor made his way downstairs, and looked at the foals. “Ah, shit.” He looked over to Colton. “Where did they come from?”

Colton ran his fingers through his hair. “No idea.” He looked down to the kids, and got on a knee. “Don’t worry... we ain’t going to hurt ya.”

Apple Bloom took a deep breath. “We’ve been runnin’ from those things forever...”

Trevor frowned. “From what things?”

Scootaloo stepped forward. “They looked like you, but... they just groaned and moaned, and tried to eat us.”

Colton put his hand on Scootaloo’s shoulder. “How long ago was this?”

“Just now.” Sweetie said.

As she said that, the all too familiar yells of the undead grew louder and louder. “Get them upstairs.” Colton said, bringing his gun up, pointed at the door. “Come back down when they are safe.”

Trevor gave a half ass salute, before saying “Yessur!” and scooping the children up in his arms, carrying them into the glass dome of the Air Trafic Control tower.

Colton took in a deep breath, as the yells grew closer and closer. I just hope they still glitch when they get inside a building.

_____________________

Kendrick leaned on the mounted fifty caliber rifle. "They could be on the northern island? Kameni?"

"Let's just see what we can find here first, then we'll go up north."

"And another thing, when did we decide to leave the Ural and take this?"

"When we realized the chopper could be anywhere, and we wanted a way to defend ourselves."

Kendrick gave a nod. "Hey, do we got anything to drink in this thing?"

Corben shrugged. "Take a look, I don’t remember everything I put in here."

Kendrick leaned forward, opening the center console. "Umm... any reason why there's three frags in here?"

"Oh..." Corben reached over, grabbing the explosives, and shoving them in his bag. "No reason."

"What the fuck man? This is a capture the flag mission, not search and destroy."

"You never know man. You can never be over prepared."

"Yes you can! You're packing three frags, a M240, a revolver, and a moving death machine! We are way over prepared!"

"We could have taken the Huey..."

"You know damn well that thing doesn't go airborne for the first thirty minutes to an hour after a restart. Only the Praga."

Corben rolled his eyes. "I haven't even put on the ghillie yet."

"You took my ghillie suit!"

"It was in the APC! I thought it was free game!"

"MY APC! Give me one good reason why I shouldn't light your bandit ass up when we stop."

Corben smiled as he turned to Kendrick. "Because I hid your NVGs in my house."

"You. Fucking. Bitch."

Corben was about to retaliate, when a flash of color caught his eye. He jerked the wheel and slammed on the brakes, making an immediate right.

"What the hell was that?" Kendrick asked, holding his now hurting stomach.

"I think I saw someone."

"There!" Kendrick screamed, pointing to the left. Corben whipped the car around, weaving through trees. "Two! There's two!"

"Fuck me, that one is fast." Corben said as the blue object pulled farther and farther away.

"Stop and let me out!" Kendrick screamed. Corben complied. "You go and get number two, I'll get the fast one."

Corben saluted, then drove off, chasing the white object.

Kendrick took out his trusty DMR. Bringing the scope up to his eye, he lined up the shot. Preparing to squeeze the trigger, he gave a loud sigh. "She is going to hate me for this." He squeezed the trigger, causing the round to soar through the air faster than the rainbow pegasus could fly. The bullet impacted in her right leg, causing the bone to break, making her scream in pain, and fall unconscious.

Kendrick stood up, and ran to the fallen pony. When he arrived, he gave a sigh of relief. Didn't kill 'er. He grabbed a bandage wrapping . Corben rolled up behind him, Rarity sitting in the passenger seat. She gave a loud gasp at the sight of her fallen friend.

"What did you do to Rainbow Dash?!" She screamed.

Corben hopped out, and walked to Kendrick. "Need an Epi?"

"Hell no! I'm not giving her that, or morphine. She can have painkillers when she wakes up, but no morphine."

Kendrick scooped up the pegasus, placing her in the back next to the gun. Grabbing his radio, he intended to find out where everyone was standing. "Count, who has what?"

"I've got Shelby and... Pinkie... dropping them off at base, then searching some more." Tyler said, annoyance in his voice. “By the way, I hate you all.”

"Fluttershy and Dustin, who about blew my head off. Asshole." DJ said.

"We've got Rainbow and Rarity, the difficult one is out cold." Kendrick said.

"Guys! It's Trevor! We're at an airfield next to the freeway! It's me, Colton, and the little girls!"

"I'll come get you in a minute." Tyler said, almost eager to leave his current cargo.

"Okay. So, we're still missing AJ, Twilight, Jose, Shawn, Matt, and Kenny. I'd say this is going pretty well." DJ said.

"Let's get back to base. We'll grab the Huey and find the others." Tyler said.

"Sounds like a plan."

Kendrick sighed, turning to Corben. "We need to drop them off, then look for more."

Corben nodded. "Yup."

Kendrick got back on the gun, taking in mind Dash at his feet. Let's just hope we can make it there without getting into too much trouble.

Kendrick's hopes were stamped out when the sound of Makarov shots filled the air.

______________

The first sound Twilight heard was the crashing of giant waves. The second, was the crackling of fire. Her eyes shot open, and immediately stood up, looking at her surroundings.

“Hey, it’s alright, calm down.” A voice said. Twilight turned to the voice, to see a single human poking at a small fire. “I found you on the shore here in Kameni, out cold. I found some matches, got some wood, and made a fire not too long ago. Thought you might want to wake up to something besides just the sand.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” She said, slowly sitting back down. “Who are you?”

“Name’s Matt.” He put the stick down, holding out his hand.

“My name is Twilight Sparkle.” She said with a smile, shaking the human’s hand.

Matt gave a small nod. “Jose is out getting some food and drink. He should be back soon.”

Twilight gave a nod, then a question popped into her head. “Why didn’t you go with him?”

Matt shrugged. “All we found before we found you was a Dinner Bell, and a SKS.” Matt reached behind him, and pulled out a long wooden rifle. “We may not play DayZ a lot, but we watch it on YouTube. And this weapon here, while it can do work if you know how to use it, will do more harm than good.”

“How so?” She asked.

“If you pop one zombie with this thing it’s so loud that ten more will take its place.” Matt said, setting down the rifle. “I have a feeling we may be here for a while longer, and I haven’t heard Jose shoot yet. So we might as well get to know each other a little bit.” Matt sat back down, rubbing his hands in front of the fire. “Where ya from?”

Twilight was about to answer, when another human came over the hill, a large bag on his back. “Well look who’s up.” Jose tossed the bag on the ground. “Found a shit ton of beans, some coke, and a few water bottles.”

Matt smiled. “Awesome. Run into any trouble?”

“Nope.” Jose rubbed his chin. “Well, actually, I almost got pinned down by some of ‘em, but I managed to sneak out the back of the building.”

Matt looked over to Twilight. “Oh! I’m sorry! Jose, this is Twilight. Twilight, this is Jose.”

Jose looked down to Twilight. “Ah, okay. Wait, you’re the one that tried to stop DJ from putting Shelby in his place?”

Twilight nodded. “Jose, really? You tried to stop DJ when he kicked Brett’s ass.” Matt said.

Jose looked to Matt. “Hey man, there’s a stronger family connection in soccer than Football.”

Matt gave a small grunt. “Bullshit.”

Twilight rubbed her chin. “Does DJ beat everyone that he fights?”

Matt and Jose looked at each other before bursting into laughter. “Babe, when you find someone that wins EVERY fight, give me a call.” Jose said.

“In some schools there’s what’s called ‘Freshman Hell Week’, which is usually when the boxing begins for us. Sophomores, Juniors, even Seniors all step into the ring, and find where the Freshies rank outside FASST.” Matt said.

“DJ, somehow just so happened to get matched up with Alex. Who ended up going into the NFL. Only the second ever to leave Noble and hit the big leagues.” Jose said, with a smile on his face.

“It was over in about ten seconds. DJ got two shots in his gut, and one to his head. Then BOOM! Right fist hit DJ right under the jaw, knocking him out cold.”

“It looked like something from the cartoons.”

Jose gave a sigh as he sat down. “Hey Matt?”

“Yeah, man, what’s up?”

“You hear that?”

Twilight and Matt both strained their ears. Blocking out any of the normal noises they heard before, they focussed on the anomalies. “I hear a... I don’t know what that sounds like.” Twilight said, a quizzical look on her face. “It sounds like a bird, or really big wings, flapping super fast.”

Matt smiled. “That’s our way out of this hell hole.” Matt stood up, digging into his pocket for his red flare. Lighting it he, he threw it as high as he could in the air. The ‘thumping’ of the chopper rapidly got closer.

___________________

Kenny’s heart was pounding. He knew what a car engine meant. He knew what shots meant. Baddies everywhere. He couldn’t trust anyone, or anything. If it bleeds, he should kill it. Kill or be killed. Hunt the hunters.

Slowly, with only his Makarov, Kenny made his way down the apartment stairs, taking great care to look for anything that could benefit him. More mags, a bigger gun, food, drink, a radio.

When he made his way to the first floor, he peeked his head around the corner, he looked for anything that could potentially be dangerous. He saw one thing.

A single zombie, wearing a orange coat. He stood still, but leaned to and fro in a wobbly, drunk motion. Kenny smiled, a headshot should put it down pretty quick. He raised the weapon, aligning the sights and squeezing the trigger.

The bullet impacted the zombie’s head, right in the ear. Kenny smiled, but that soon vanished when the zombie turned to face him, and gave a loud yell. “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!” He screamed, unloading the last six bullets into his head. The zombie just began sprinting to Kenny.

Kenny popped in his next mag, unloading another seven shots, but still the zombie ran at him. “Fucking die!” Kenny screamed, throwing down the small pistol, and began running from the zombie.

As he rounded the corner, his stomach hit the floor. Thirteen zombies all running straight for him. Kenny looked to the fence on his right. “Oh, really? We’re doing this?” He gave a sigh, running to the fence and hopping over.

When he hit the ground, he gave a big smile. “Thank you! Thank you! Now go fuck yourselves!”

His smile quickly faded when the zombies, instead of running into the fence, started to run around the building. And to make matters worse, the vehicle he heard earlier was getting closer. Kenny looked around, giving a loud sigh of relief when he saw a ladder. Wasting no time, he grabbed hold, and began to climb up.

“Kenny!” A voice screamed.

Kenny looked down, to see the vehicle come to a stop on the other side of the fence, the fifty caliber cutting down zombies. “Kenny! Get in!”

“Don’t gotta tell me twice!” He said as he started sliding down the ladder. As he hopped the fence again, Kendrick’s face twisted into pure horror.

“Zero! Patient Zero!” He screamed, holding down the trigger. “Kenny! get your ass in the fucking car!”

Kenny ran towards the passenger seat, already occupied by a white mare. “Move bitch!” He screamed.

“How ru-HEY!” Rarity screamed, as Kenny shoved her onto the center console.

“Drive you hairy bastard, drive!” Kenny screamed in Corben’s ear.

Corben, however, did the opposite. Instead, he rolled out of the vehicle with on of the three frags in his hand. “Over prepared my ass!” He screamed as he ran up to Patient Zero, placing the frag in his coat pocket, barely avoiding Zero’s deadly blow. Planting his foot, he turned and ran back to the car, pushing his foot to the floor pulling them out of the blast radius. Corben looked to Kendrick as the monster turned into a red mist, painting all the buildings around them. “What was that? I think that you owe me an apology.” Corben said with a wide grin.

Kendrick rolled his eyes. “Kiss my ass.”

Corben shrugged. “If that’s as close as I’ll get to an apology, I’ll take it.”

________________

Shawn groaned in pain, looking at his now twisted leg. “Fucking doors...” He said. He looked up across the street. It’s a long shot, but maybe there’s some morphine in the church. He slowly began his crawl to the large building. He looked over to his left to find two military tens. Inside one, the beautiful long tube with orange and purple tips. He smiled, quickly crawling over.

When he got inside the tent he immediately popped open the tube, stabbing the needle into his leg. He gave a sigh of relief when the fluid entered his veins. Once the fluid was depleted, he decided to look around the church for anything else that could be useful. When he walked in, he looked around at the piles of stuff sitting everywhere. He smiled when he saw a pile of loot, consisting of bandages, food, coke, and a revolver with ammo. “Oh, hells to the yes!” He said.

He began picking up the items, shoving them in his pockets, when something caught his attention. He became uber paranoid and decided to look over his shoulder.

And saw nothing.

He shrugged, and grabbed the last of the loot. He walked over to the back of the church, discarding the scrap metal, but grabbing the pile of flares. He turned to the exit, almost shitting himself at what he saw.

Hiding in the corner, on the right side of walking into the church, was an orange pony. A cowboy hat on the ground next to her. In a pool of dark red blood; her blood.

“Shit.” Shawn said, sprinting to the downed pony. His hands hovered in front of him for a second, before he composed himself, checking for a pulse.

It was there, but slow, and weak.

“Okay... okay... ummm...let’s see... you need a... bandage! You need a bandage!” He said, rolling her over, he found the wound. Multiple small lacerations grouped together, undoubtedly caused by the rotted nails of the undead. Shawn wrapped the bandage around her in a sloppy fashion, but in a way that would still get the job done.

“Alright... that should work for now.” He said, as he dragged her to the back of the church. Shawn let out a sigh. “Too bad I don’t have a blood bag...” He reached into his pocket, pulling out one of his flares. “I guess I could light this, just in case someone comes by.”

Shawn walked to just outside the front of the church, and tossed down the flare. He gave a nod, and walked back to the back of the church. He sighed as he took a seat next to the unconscious orange pony. He gave a small grunt, before leaning against the podium. He closed his eyes, and took in a deep breath. Before drifting off to sleep, for a quick nap.

“Bitch, wake up!” A voice screamed in Shawn’s ear.

Shawn’s eyes opened, to see DJ and Tyler. “What the hell man?”

“We’re here to wake your ass up and take you to base.” Tyler said.

Shawn looked past Tyler to see DJ holding a blood bag over his head. “Man, she’s lucky you were here man. Gonna guess she was pretty close to death. She only stays awake for about five seconds then she’s out again.” DJ said.

“I guess.” Shawn said, standing up. “How’d you guys get here?”

“Chopper.” Tyler said.

Shawn gave a nod then watched as DJ injected the epi into AJ, who slowly opened her eyes. “Where...”

“Shhhhhh.... Wait a second. Let your body start firing on all cylinders first.” DJ said, placing her hat on her head with a smile.

Shawn turned to Tyler. “So, what’s the plan?”

Tyler shrugged. “Besides get back to base, we don’t know. We haven’t got that far.”

Shawn nodded. “Who all is here?”

“If by here you mean Taviana, all of us. If you mean just this church and city, just the four of us.”

“Where’s everyone else?”

“Back at base.” DJ said, helping AJ to her hooves. “You guys are the last one we had to find and pick up. Thanks for the flare by the way.” He looked over to Shawn. “Made finding you guys a ton easier.”

Shawn gave a nod. “Yeah... no problem.”

Tyler looked at Shawn with a frown. “Dude, you alright? You don’t sound like yourself?”

Shawn shook his head. “No... I’m not alright...” He turned to Tyler. “I’m fucking starving!”

Tyler gave a smile, and motioned for the door. “Let’s get back to base, we have plenty of food there. And we can get our plan of action together from there.”

DJ nodded. “We got showers too. Because you...” He pointed to Shawn. “...smell like shit. And you...” He pointed to AJ “...need to get that red out of your fur.”

Really though?

Fluttershy's eyes slowly opened, and get senses all starting to come online. She smelt a fire, and the cozy contents of the room she was in. She felt the warm thick blanket covering her body, along with the bandages and small welts from the day before. She saw light streaming in through the windows, and ponies and people passing by the house. She heard loud machines outside, mainly a rapid chopping sound similar to the machine that had chased her and DJ.

Then, she heard a knock.

"Fluttershy, we have to go. Are you awake?" A familiar voice said through the door. A voice that had been violent beyond comprehension before, now gently waking the mare.

"Yes, I'm awake." She replied, easing herself out of the bed. She gave a small yelp of pain as her hooves touched the floor. The injury still present.

"Are you decent?" The voice asked.

"I'm fine. Just a..."

"I meant can I walk in and not get screamed at?"

"Yes."

With that, the sound of buttons being pressed and the door unlocking filled the room. When the door swung open, DJ stood in the doorway. He had in his hands fresh bandages, painkillers, food, and water. "Sit on the bed." He commanded.

Fluttershy nodded, turning back to the bed. She crawled up and turned to face DJ, who was grabbing something from a dresser. He pulled out four silver objects and put them in his bag. "What are those?" She asked.

DJ stood up, zipping his bag, and continuing over to the pony. "Ammo." He said. He got down on one knee next to the bed. "Alright, raise your wing up."

Fluttershy lifted her wings up, allowing DJ to remove the old bandages. "I didn't know you were a doctor?" She said as DJ started cleaning the wound with extreme caution.

"I'm not, but my mama is a nurse and she taught me a lot." He replied, focusing on the task at hand. "Are you hurting?" He asked.

"Ummm... a little."

"Alright, let me finish this then I'll let you eat and get some pills. We have to leave very soon though, Corben is getting impatient in the chopper."

Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. "Are we leaving?"

DJ nodded as he finished up the wrappings and opened the box of pills. "Yeah, we're headed south to the docks where we can get a lot of supplies."

Fluttershy said "Okay," as she took the pills and had the quickest breakfast of her life. DJ went over and held the door open as the yellow pegasus stepped outside. They were the last to get in the chopper.

As Fluttershy got in, she immediately heard DJ tell Corben to take off. Waking a little more quickly, she took a seat next to Rarity and Twilight, who helped fasten her in.

As the helicopter slowly lifted off, the humans (who were armed to the teeth with weapons and ammo) began to converse amongst themselves. Talking about girls, loot, guns, and other strange things.

Fluttershy looked over her shoulder to see DJ. He was near the edge of the door, looking like he was about to fall out of the chopper. He leaned against a massive weapon that had multiple barrels. Every now and again he would hit a button on his weapon causing it to spin at different speeds.

A yell from the other gunner caught DJ's attention. "Hey, DJ!" DJ turned around, raising his eyebrows in a questioning way. "What have you got your RPM set at?"

"Six." He replied.

"Don't you think that's a little overkill?" Kendrick asked from his seat.

"The more bullets you put into something, the quicker it dies. And I like my targets dead." He said with a smile.

Kendrick shrugged as he leaned back in his seat, checking his DMR mag. Another voice came from Tyler. “Alright, Kendrick. You know who Jessica Alba is right?”

Kendrick frowned. “Yeah, why?”

“Okay, would you fuck her?” He asked, raising his eyebrows in a concerned manner.

Kendrick laughed. “Hell ya, who wouldn’t?”

Tyler held out his hand. “Just wait… What if you were about to fuck her, you know, play with her tatas, smoochin', all that good stuff. Then you take her pants off and there’s a dick. Would you suck it?”

Kendrick rubbed his chin for a moment in thought. “Probably.”

Tyler’s eyes widened “Are you serious?”

Kendrick threw his hands to the side. “We’ve already got that far, might as well!”

Tyler shook his head. “What about you, Jose?”

Jose leaned back from his gunner seat. “Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeell no!” He stated.

Tyler pointed at Jose, with a nod of approval. “DJ, what about you?” Tyler asked.

"What about me?" DJ asked.

"Would you suck on Jessica Alba's dick?"

"Who's Jessica Alba?" DJ asked, real confusion in his voice.

Jose looked at DJ. "Are you serious? She's the bitch from "Fantastic Four"!"

DJ's eyes widened. "Oh, that bitch!"

Jose nodded. "Yeeeeees."

DJ sighed as he leaned against the gun. “That’s a hard one, no pun intended. But… It depends.”

Tyler leaned forward in disbelief. “Are you serious? ‘It depends?’ On what! What does it depend on?”

“Well, I’d fuck her in the ass right now. So a dick wouldn’t deter me from that. But suck it… It depends…”

“What the fuck does it depend on!” Tyler screamed. It was more of a statement than a question, but brought the older mare's attention to the human's conversation, causing them to close the young one’s ears.

“Well it depends on if it’s artificial or not!”

“Artificial?” Tyler frowned, confusion in his voice.

“Well was she born with a dick, or did she get older and decide, ‘Hey, I want a penis?’” DJ said, turning his eyes from the sky and into the chopper.

“It doesn’t matter! It’s still a dick!”

“But it’s Jessica Alba!” DJ yelled back.

“Okay, let’s say it was someone like… some random chick you see when you go to college, and you and Ry have broke up. She has a nice rack, nice ass, pretty perfect. You kick it off and get to her place, it starts to get hot and heavy when BOOM! She has a dick. Would. You. Suck it?”

DJ threw his hands out. “It depends if it’s natural or not!”

“What the fuck does that have to do with anything? It’s a penis. P-E-N-I-S!”

“Well if she was born with a vadge, then she is a girl! I would be having sex with a women. But if it was a guy that got implants in surgery, then it’s gay.”

“It’s still a fucking penis!”

“But it’s a woman from birth, that’s why it matters!”

No one heard Corben banging on the window from the cockpit.

“Bullshit!” Tyler screamed.

“Okay, what if your girl one day came up to you and said ‘So, I’m having surgery and getting a dick.’ Are you going to break up with her?”

Tyler’s mouth slammed shut as he went into a deep thought. “Come on Tyler, would ya?” Kendrick asked with a smile.

_____________________

Matt pinched the bridge of his nose as group of linebackers, besides Jose, went on and on and on. He let out a defeated sigh as he looked at the people and ponies around him, looking for any kind of conversation.

"Hey, Shelby?" Matt asked, leaning forward in his seat. "What other sport do you do?"

Shelby looked up to Matt from across the chopper. "I throw shot and discuss."

Matt smiled. "So you're in track?"

Shelby nodded. "Now, I haven't thrown in years, but it's just like riding a bike. You never forget." Shelby frowned. "What do you do?"

"I wrestle." Matt replied. "Me and Colton both."

"Ha, gay!" Trevor said with a wink, getting a quick punch from Colton.

Curiosity eventually gripped the rainbow pegasus. "What all sports do you have?" She asked, glad to get her attention away from the linebackers.

"Let's see..." Dustin said, holding up a finger for each sport they had. "Football, fast and slow pitch softball, soccer, baseball, track and field, golf, wrestling, and... would you consider FFA's shooting a sport?" He asked, looking over to Trevor.

"Uhhhh... well it's a club... I don't think so?" He said, just as confused as Dustin.

The entire helicopter eventually was filled with different conversations between ponies and humans, all trying to ignore the massive argument that was being has just a foot away. Trevor looked over to the orange mare, with apples on her hip. Sticking out his hand, he gave a weak smile. “I don’t believe we’ve been properly introduced,” he said, “my name’s Trevor. Unlike another Trevor we all know though, I’m actually pretty sane.” He said with a light chuckle.

Applejack smiled back as she stuck out her hoof. “Pleasure to meet ya, even under these circumstances.”

Trevor gave a quick nod. “So, Applejack, what do you do for a living? And yes, I know it’s small talk, but it beats anything else going on in this stupid heli.”

“Yup, that d’scribes it pretty well.” Applejack said. “I help run an apple farm back in Ponyville!’

Trevor raised his eyebrows. “Funny, I used to… Kinda work on a farm myself… We all have.” Applejack raised an eyebrow in question. “Coach made us haul hay during the summer when we couldn’t practice. Because we can build up weight strength all we want, but nothing beats country strength!”

Colton laughed. “Seriously? Old man strength would put country strength in the dirt anyday!”

Trevor thought for a second before nodding in agreement. “That is true, old man strength beats country strength, and both of those beat weight strength.”

Applejack cocked her head. “So what do ya do now?”

Trevor made a motion to Colton. “We both work in a boat shop in Norman, old man there is a genius with engines. Can straight up stick his ear to an engine and can HEAR what’s wrong with it!”

Applejack had an even more confused look on her face. “Ain’t that dangerous?”

Trevor and Colton glanced at each other before shrugging and looking back to Applejack. “Well, it can be, but I don’t really see how?”

“Well… Boat engines, aren’t them a bit unstable?”

Trevor slowly shook his head. “No more unstable than a car engine?”

“Car engine?”

Trevor’s eyes got extremely wide. “Oh! What kind of boats do you have?”

“Steam?”

Colton and Trevor facepalmed. “God dammit…” They said in unison.

Trevor let out a sigh and looked over to Applejack. “Our boats are gasoline powered, not steam. We help work on racing boats.”

Rainbow Dash laughed. “That must be the slowest race ever!” She stated.

“Erm… Boats aren’t slow where we’re from.” Trevor said with a smile. “They go well over two-hundred miles an hour in a few seconds. ANYTHING but slow.”

Colton sighed. “You know what I miss already? From the… what? Two days? Three days we’ve been gone?”

Trevor looked over to Colton. “What?”

“Fishin’. I. Miss. Fishin’.”

Trevor smiled. “First thing we do when we get back, we go out to Thunderbird or something for a few hours?”

Colton smiled. “You know what would be even better than fishin’?”

Trevor raised an eyebrow in question. “What?”

“Baseball season!”

Trevor sighed. “Not really, we won’t get nearly as far this year as we did last year. We lost too many people. Too many good people.”

Matt looked over to Trevor. “The sophomores are good aren’t they?”

Trevor looked over to Matt. “They may be good, but they ain’t no Jon-Jon.”

Twilight looked over to Matt. “Jon-Jon?”

Matt nodded. “He was awesome, but he graduated.”

Twilight leaned forward. “So how does your education system work? DJ was a little… unresponsive with any questions he was asked.”

Matt rubbed his fingers through his hair. “Pretty much, you start when you’re like five, all the way until you’re eighteen, then choose if you want to learn more. College. But high school will probably be the highlight of most of our lives.”

“Oh, how so?”

Matt smiled. “Because, we’re still too ignorant to think things out before we do it. We see it better to do and ask for forgiveness than ask for permission.”

“So, what were you doing before you came into Equestria?” Rarity asked, coming into the conversation kinda late.

Dustin made hand pistols, shooting everyone and everypony in the chopper. “Paintball!”

“Paintball? What’s that?” Pinkie asked. “Oh! is it some kind of game?”

Dustin nodded. “Oh yeah!” He said. “We get a bunch of weapons, like what we got now,” he held up his M16 “But instead of bullets, they are filled with these little balls that are filled with paint. They pop when they hit you, and you’re 'out.’”

“Do they hurt?” Fluttershy asked.

“Well, a little. But only if you think about it too much. But you know what pain is good for?”

“What?”

Trevor, Matt, Shelby, Colton, Kenny, and Shawn in unison all said: “It let’s you know you’re alive!”

Kenny laughed a little. “If you’re hurtin’, that means you’re still kickin’!”

A sudden change in the linebacker’s voice cut off the conversation pretty quickly.

____________________________________

Jose just shook his head at the gunner’s seat. “Y’all are gay as fuck…” He looked up to DJ, his eyes turning to the size of pins. “DJ!” He screamed.

DJ frowned before Jose pointed outside of the Huey. DJ turned, his heart skipping a beat. Multiple helicopters were closing in, as well as a biplane gaining on them.

Over the intercom, Corben’s voice came in as static. “Dammit DJ!”

DJ grabbed the weapon, spinning it around at the aircraft. “Jose, If any come to your side, they’re yours!”

“Got it!” He screamed.

Twilight started to panic as she heard the jokes switch over to a serious tone. She turned to Jose; the closest gunner. “What’s going on?”

Jose wiped the sweat forming on his brow. “The Japs have a grudge, and I guess they found us flying around.”

Twilight frowned. “The Japs?”

“Japanese. They fucking hate us.”

“What did you do?” She asked. Jose’s weapon started spinning.

“We stole their helicopter.” He looked over to Twilight with a smirk. “This helicopter.”

As Twilight started to understand, bullets whizzed through the huey, almost hitting the passengers. Screams filled the chopper. Static came over the speaker. “Hang on! DJ, get ready!”

The helicopter banked into a sharp turn, causing everyone and everypony to shift in their seats, the only thing keeping them in was the straps in the seats. Shawn and Shelby leaned over, making sure the little kids, who had tears running down their faces, didn’t slide out. Fluttershy had sunk as far into the seat as possible as DJ’s gun spun. Then, an ear shattering sound. Six thousand rounds per minute shot from the weapon to the biplane, with almost all of them hitting. A bone shaking explosion caused everyone inside to cover their ears. The chopper filled with light as the plane burst into flames.

“Gotcha mother fucker!” DJ screamed, aiming the gun at the next target, a Mi-17.

“Jose, we have two tangos on your side!” Corben screamed over the speaker as the heli lurched over. Twilight looked over the edge, realizing that below them was a vast blue ocean.

Jose's scanned the sky, the noise from his spinning weapon sounding more and more violent. A static came over the speakers again. "I'm getting us over land. Maybe we can lose them in the mountains!"

"Just get us out of here!" Jose screamed as he let loose four hundred rounds per minute into another Huey that was pulling up beside them.

Twilight started to relax just a little as she saw solid land getting closer and closer. But then, she saw the sunrise.

This sun was nothing like princess Celestia's sun. But despite that fact, Twilight couldn't help but be mesmerized by the way the glowing orb's colors reflected of the surface of the ocean. However, this didn't last long.

DJ and Jose both let out battle cries as they held down the triggers for their enormous weapons. After about five seconds, two more explosions filled the air. The result was a chorus of 'fuck yeah!'

DJ looked around for anymore hostiles. When he was satisfied there weren't any, he leaned back and started laughing. "Ho-ly shit that was close!" He stated. "Everyone alright back there?" DJ asked, looking around at his passengers.

Judging by their new pale faces, the answer was a definite no. DJ shrugged. "Ah well, can't do much about that." He chuckled.

"That was all of them, wasn't it?" Kendrick asked, trying to hide his shaking hands.

"Should be, unless they are still looting up north."

Kendrick nodded.

Twilight looked down onto the land, the massive forest reminded her off the Everfree, only without a thick canopy to hide the forest floor. Despite an occasional road, it was almost untouched. One thing caught her eye in the giant wilderness though. "What are those?" She asked, pointing to two black moving objects.

Kendrick looked over the edge. "I dunno.... they look like..."

As he was about to answer, familiar red lines started coming from the black dots. Jose's eyes got wide. "Armored SUV!" He screamed as the bullets impacted the chopper. The harsh *tings* on the metal shell eventually caused the chopper to lurch.

Corben's voice came over once again. "They hit our ta..." Corben's voice was cut off as bullets from the ground mounted mini guns impacted the cockpit, destroying all the instruments.

Almost immediately after, the helicopter started to spin. The SUV's had landed some lucky shots on the tail rotor. All the ponies and people were thrown to the side once again, DJ and Jose holding onto the weapons with every ounce of strength they had. But it was too much; DJ was thrown from the chopper.

As he was ejected, he spun himself around. The heli was spinning faster and faster as more and more bullets impacted the side. He closed his eyes as the air rushed through his hair.

And he smiled.

Not because he was going to die, or the ponies. But because they were going to wake up. Because he would soon learn the truth. Because, it was all according to plan.

DJ knew they were dreaming, and needed a way to wake them all up at one time. He also knew Corben's flying patterns. All he needed to do was say some coords and a time. And guess who showed up.

DJ spun himself around as he got closer and closer to the ground. He made his body as aerodynamic as possible, he would be the first to hit the ground. He needed to wake up first. He needed to know his surround first. He needed to find his friends first. But most importantly...

He needed to make sure Ryan hadn't followed him.

Kendrick let out a groan of pain as his eyes eased open. His vision was filled with twisted metal, blood, smoke, and fire. Slowly, Kendrick released the belts holding him into the seat, his body shaking with every subtle movement. Once his restraints were off, Kendrick looked around at his surroundings, surveying the damage done.

The helicopter was wedged into the ground with bodies scattered both inside and out. Supplies from the cargo bay lay thrown across the forest floor. Kendrick let out a groan as he pulled himself out of the helicopter. "Fuckin' Japs..." He mumbled to himself.

Standing up slowly, Kendrick looked around at the supplies. He gave a small chuckle. "I always wanted to find a heli crash site. This isn't how I wanted to find it though."

Kendrick started to lean over and grab food, when a noise caused him to whip around with his his weapon shouldered. Kendrick, crouched down, slowly started moving towards the sound. As he got closer and the sound got louder though, he quickened his pace. When he had got all the way around, he was almost in a dead sprint.

Laying on the ground, was a yellow filly with a red bow. An Earth pony. Covered in a pool of blood from the SUV rounds. Her small whimpers made Kendrick drop his weapon and search for supplies. "DJ... DJ always had medical sh... DJ got ejected from the chopper..." Kendrick started looking on the ground for anything that could stop the bleeding, ease the pain, or bring life back into the pony. Nothing.

Kendrick started to panic, holding his hands above his head for oxygen. Then, a voice. "It's o... okay..."

Kendrick looked down at the pony that was managing a weak smile. "What?"

"You..." Applebloom seized in pain before continuing. "You tried y'er best."

Kendrick fell down on both his knees in front of the pony, ignoring the nearing voices in the forest. "I'm so sorry..."

Applebloom looked up to Kendrick. "I'm... I'm tired..."

Kendrick looked down at the filly, before gently sitting down beside her, and reaching his hands underneath her. She let out a yelp, but was quickly silenced by the warm embrace in the cold forest. Kendrick slowly started to rock to and fro with the filly in his arms. There was no one else above besides them. And soon, he would be alone.

"A'hm really tired..." she said again.

Kendrick thought for a second, before an idea came to him. He would lull her to sleep, ease the pain of death.

"Hush...." Kendrick had to stop and compose himself, he could feel her heart rate getting slower and slower.

"Hush little baby, don't you cry.

Evening's gunna be alright

Stiffen up that upper lip, little lady

I told you, daddy's here to hold you through the night..."

The voices were getting closer, and her heart was getting slower. Choking on his words, Kendrick continued.

"I know mommy's not here right now

And we don't know why

We fear how we feel inside

It may seem crazy, pretty baby...."

Her heart rate was almost non existent.

"But I promise, momma's gonna be alright"

Kendrick took in a deep breath as the filly let out her last. Tears streamed down Kendrick's face, but he still held the child, and continued.

"And if you ask me to, daddy's gonna buy you a mocking bird

Imma give you the world

Imma buy a diamond ring for you

Imma sing for you

I'll do anything for you to see you smile..."

And with that, Kendrick gently placed the filly on the ground and grabbed his DMR. The Japanese flashlights scanning the burning heli made Kendrick duck down behind what he assumed was part of the old metal plating.

"And if that bird don't sing and that ring don't shine

Imma break that birdie's neck!" Kendrick chambered a round to his DMR.

"I'll go back to the jeweler who sold it to ya

Make him eat every carat..." Kendrick stood up with his finger on the trigger.

"DON'T FUCK WITH DAD!" He screamed as he looked down the scope, crosshairs on a forehead already. He pulled the trigger, blood exploding from the head and the body falling to the forest floor. Without skipping a beat, he whipped the rifle around, the crosshairs landing on another Japanese soldier's chest. He quickly pulled the trigger twice as that body fell to the ground. But before Kendrick could make another move, two Japanese soldiers had their weapons to their shoulders, letting the barrage of bullets rain into Kendrick's body.

Kendrick quickly died.

Wake me up, when September ends

DJ kept his eyes sealed shut, observing his surroundings with his other senses first. If he was being watched, he didn’t want to be immediately found out. He took in a deep breath through his nose… Ash, water, humid air, and dirty laundry filling his nostrils. He could hear the occasional steps of what he assumed was patrolling guards as well as other slow melodic breaths. He could only assume they were coming from his friends sharing the room with him. He learned quickly that he was not in any type of bed, but laid down on a solid, stone, floor.

He slowly peeked one eye open, glancing at anything he could. All he could see was dark walls, and a little light coming from a little window in a door. Assuming he wasn't being watched, he slowly sat up, taking a good look around.

Everyone, and everypony, was laying flat on their backs perfectly still. The only movement from them was the rise and fall of their breaths, their eyes under their eyelids, and the occasional twitch. DJ slowly got to his feet, checking everything he had on him.

Which was only his phone in his pocket. Other than that, all he had was the clothes on his back.

"WHAT T..." Jose could only get a fraction of a sentence out before DJ had landed on top of him, hand sealing his mouth shut.

"Shush! You're gonna get us killed!" DJ whispered. "Hurry, take your shirt off, and rip it into long strands." DJ said as the realization that all others in the room would scream when they woke up as well.

"Uhhhh, why?" Jose asked, but still complied.

DJ looked over to Jose. "Gag 'em so they can't scream."

Jose had a look of confusion, which suddenly changed when he remembered how he himself woke up. "Hey, where the fuck are we?" He asked.

"Not sure, but we can't stay h..."

A muffled scream came from Corben, who sat straight up with sweat pouring down his forehead. He looked over to DJ, who had a finger on his lips.

"..here for long." DJ finished. Corben's hands quickly fumbled around in his mouth, before the torn fabric was fished out of his mouth.

"What the fuck, man!?" He whispered with as much intensity as possible.

"I'll explain later!" DJ said. "Just hurry up and get them gagged! I don't wa..."

A cyan pegasus bolted straight upright, fear and pain clearly shown in her eyes. She tried to let out a blood curdling scream, but was stopped by the gag. Confused, she worked her hoof around in her mouth, fishing out the gag. Jose quickly made his way over to her, tapping her on the shoulder. She turned and was about to say something, when his finger touched her lips to silence her. He then put another finger on his own lips, letting out a “shhhhhhhh.” He pointed to the other unconscious ponies on the ground. “Can you help us keep them quiet when they wake up?” Jose whispered.

Rainbow Dash slowly nodded as Jose made his way back to Corben. Reality hit Rainbow like a train. “Wait, where are we?” She asked in a hushed voice.

“No clue.” DJ said as he used the last of his fabric to gag Kenny. “But whoever h…”

“MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!” Tyler started flopping on the ground violently, before a frown formed on his face. “Mmmm… Mmmm mmm mmmm?” His fingers reached into his mouth. “You g…”

“Dude, shut up!” DJ said, grabbing the fabric from Tyler’s hand, reusing it on Rarity.

Tyler looked around him. “Oh shit…” He said. When he realized what the other two humans were doing, he started tearing fabric from his shirt as well.

This continued for a solid five minutes. Jose and DJ gagging the ponies and humans, Rainbow Dash would quickly fly over to the next person who woke up, then Corben and Tyler would then arrive to explain the situation. But in all reality, they didn’t have a clue about what they were in. It was obvious that the ponies were real and Taviana wasn’t, but why were they in a cell?

Kendrick was the last person to wake up, and seemed more relieved than scared and in pain. Looking at each other, they all had a look of “What now?”

The answer quickly came when a set of voices, one male and one female started approaching the door. DJ looked over to the groups. “Lay down, act like you’re asleep and maybe we can capture the captors!” He whispered. Laying flat on their backs, everypony and every human in the room, acted like they were once again in the dreamland of Taviana.

_____________________________________

“You have them subdued?” Red asked, a raised eyebrow showed he was impressed with the mare’s accomplishment.

“Yes, they are all under a sleeping spell. We also have their dreams linked together, they think they are in another world entirely.” Lust said with a proud smile. “They should be out for another two hours.”

Red looked over. “Do they know?” He asked.

Her smile slowly started to fade. “Know what?”

“Do they know they are in a dream?” His voice carrying a very serious tone as they got closer to the cell door.

“There’s no way they can know, we have the dream as clear as we can get it.” She insisted.

The stallion turned to look at the mare. “You haven’t been monitoring their dream?” A frown clear on his face.

“We watched it for an hour, then we cut the feed. With this many ponies under the spell, it requires way more energy than you can imagine. They had no clue when we cut it though, they were just talking around campfires.” She said, trying her best to defend herself.

The stallion looked through the cell door’s window at the demons and ponies. They lay still, their chest rising and falling slowly. He let out a sigh. “You got lucky, Lust. But luck doesn’t last forever.” He slowly opened the door. He wanted to observe the demon from Canterlot, he was the biggest, and from the reports, the meanest. Stepping over the bodies on the floor, Lust and Red made their way to the demon, DJ.

When they got to him, Red smiled. “He’s perfect.” He said. He observed everything, every twitch, the rise and fall of his chest, even the eyes under his eyelids moving. “Lust, tell me. What is in his mind now?”

Lust’s horn ignited, a small strand of magic going onto DJ’s forehead. She frowned. “He’s walking through a field of some crop.” She said. “He has one of those weapons we got from the other demons. He looks as if he’s on a mission to get somewhere, but in no hurry.”

Red frowned. “I thought the groups were together? And why is he missing an article of clothing?” He asked, still staring at the demon. He didn’t receive a response. “Lust, when I ask you a question, you answer it.” He said sternly. Still nothing. With anger building inside him, he whipped his head around. “Lust! Whe…” He was cut short at a new sight.

One of the demons had Lust in a headlock, cutting off the air to her lungs, a hand firmly grasping the base of her horn. Red heard a shuffle behind him. Slowly turning, he was met with a pair of icy blue eyes staring into his soul. Before he could react, the demon had a firm grasp on Red’s horn.

“Well well well…” It said with a devilish smile. “What have we here? It would appear the captors have been captured.” The demon said. Before Red could respond, he heard more shuffling. His eyes darted to his right as every demon and pony stood up to their full height. He gulped. He didn’t know what to say in this situation.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen.” DJ said, his hand holding the horn in a way that would result in a quick *snap*. “You’re going to tell us where our stuff is, where my ring is, the way out, and the direction to Ponyville. Then, you are going to forget we ever existed, and shut down whatever operation you have going on here.”

Red thought for a moment. “And what if I don’t?” He asked.

The demon got right next to Red’s ear. “Then I will find my gear, find my way out of here, and find my way back to Ponyville. But that will make me very upset. You won’t like me when I’m upset.” It said.

Red sighed. “Your gear is in the next room to the right. Keep going straight then take a right, you’ll run into some stairs, take those then take a right. The double doors lead out and directly to a path that runs into Ponyville.”

The demon smiled.”Corb, go check if our gear is there.”

“Roger!” The other demon said, jogging over to the next room. A minute later, 'Corb' came back. “Yup, everything’s there.” He said.

DJ smiled, looking back to Red. “Good, you all leave me and Tyler, go get geared up.” He said. “We need to have a chat with these amazing hosts of ours." The demons nodded, leaving the room with the ponies in tow. Once they left, DJ gripped the horn even harder.

"Now listen and listen good." He said, yanking Red's head closer. " You will not follow us, and I will kill you if your information is wrong. But, do not think that you're getting out of here without punishment." With a quick yank, Red's horn was disconnected from his head. Leaning down, the demon spoke into his ear. " Remember me." He said. Standing up, he nodded to the other demon, who held the mare up in the air.

"P-p-please." She whimpered.

DJ smiled. "Oh, I'm not going to knock you out. You know, you're a very pretty mare." He said, running his hand down her cheek. "It would be a shame if those just barbaric guards got in here, I'm sure the first thing they would to their unconscious leader would be too help her." Lust's face started to turn pale. DJ chuckled. "Disband this little group of yours, and never let me see your face again."

The mare quickly nodded as the second demon dropped her to the ground. When the two left the room, Lust looked over to the stallion. His horn dismembered from his head. With that sight, Lust gave a quick nod, agreeing to the deal that was made between the demon and the pony. She had seen what they were capable of, and how quickly they were able to make their violent decisions and make one sided deals. She knew that she never should have tried to bring them into her world.

They were worse than Discord.

__________________________

“You realize you are way too rich to be from Noble, right Corben?” Kendrick said as he pulled his mask over his face.

Corben smiled as he picked up his MILSIG paintball gun. “What makes you say that?”

“Oh , I dunno, maybe because you’re packing a thousand dollar rifle.” Kendrick said as he screwed his air tank into his own gun, a much more modest Brass Eagle.

A more metallic click caught the Defensive End and Linebacker’s attention. They turned to see Shelby holding a very real shotgun. His eyes getting big and bright with a smile forming on his face. “Yeah, you guys have fun with your paintball, I found my loadout!”

Before Shelby could react, a hand reached out and snatched it from his hand. “Don’t think so, mate.” DJ said as he flipped the safety on and ejected the shell.

“Hey asshole! I found that first!” Shelby protested.

DJ looked to Shelby in disbelief. “This is my fucking gun, It’ll be a chilly day in hell when I let you have it.”

Before Shelby could protest, his own gun was put into his chest. “Come on, man. Just shut up and let’s get going. I don’t want to be in this fucking castle or forest for long.” Matt said.

DJ looked around the room. “Where are the girls?”

“Outside with Kenny and Dustin.” Corben said. “They already got their gear, and the girls are rather eager to get home.”

“Don’t blame ‘em.” DJ said as he put his own items in his pockets. “Hey, you guys got an extra shirt?”

Corben opened his bag, before emerging with only a wife beater. “Will this work?”

DJ nodded. “It’ll have to. I got a shirt back in my truck.”

Corben smiled. “So, Lil’ Red’s here too?”

DJ gave a quick nod. “Yup.” He said, looking to everyone else in the room. “Let’s go, we need to get a plan sorted out.”

As everyone left the small room, DJ checked once more to be sure he wasn’t forgetting anything. After a quick pat down of himself, he assumed that everything that he should have, he did have.

Until his thumb ran over his finger. His ring was still in the castle. He walked back into the room, checking every little box and corner. After two minutes, Kendrick peeked his head into the room. “Hey, man. We got to go, what are you hunting for?”

DJ let out a sigh. “Someone stole my ring not too long ago…”

Kendrick snapped his fingers, pointing and waving his finger. “Shelby has it!”

Shaking his head and standing up, DJ made his way to the door. “Why the hell he has it, I don’t know. But he better not think he’s gonna keep it.”

Once outside, the group formed a small circle, waiting for instruction from Twilight or DJ. He stepped forward first. “Here’s what we’re doing. We’re gonna get out of this forest as fast as we can, then me, Twilight, and the guys are loading up in Lil’ Red and headed to Canterlot. Twilight, you are coming with us. There isn't enough room in the truck, so if you want to come, take the train." Looking over to Shelby, DJ held out his hand. "You found a ring, it belongs to me."

Shelby fished in his pockets, eventually finding the silver ring. Taking it, DJ made a whirling motion above his head. "Let's move!" Playing with the ring between his fingers, it felt different. But at the same time, vaguely familiar. Frowning, DJ looked down at the ring. A smile crept on his face at the sight of a small rainbow aura of colors that circled the ring. This had happened before, but a god have given it to him.

As the group started to leave, DJ felt a slight tug on his shoe. A small vine had broken the surface and was starting to wrap around his foot. Placing the ring on his finger, he pointed the gem at the strange plant. A sharp blue light quickly flashed from the ring, turning the vine into ash. Looking around to make sure no one saw, he brought it up to his face. A large smile forming on his face.

As he brought his shotgun to his shoulder, Kendrick walked up beside him. "Hey, you see what I see?"

DJ looked around for anything out of the ordinary. "See what?"

Kendrick pointed into the forest. Following the finger, DJ saw the item in question. Two yellow glowing orbs. At first they just looked like lanterns.

Then, they blinked.

Kendrick glared at DJ, hitting him in the chest. "Are you serious right now? This is the fucking universe we got trapped in?"

DJ narrowed his eyes. "Is that..."

"Ruby? Yup, which means..."

"That we need to get the fuck out of here." DJ said. Walking a little faster he got behind the group. "Come on ladies, let's go! We're burnin' daylight!"

Kendrick shook his head. "Out of every universe for us to get stuck in, we landed in this one?"

"If we ignore it we won't have to deal with it." DJ said, glancing back at the orbs. "And Nightmare night isn't for another couple months."

Kendrick have a weak smile. "Just as long as we funny have to deal with those Bl..."

DJ glared at Kendrick. "This stays between us, understand? We don't tell anyone about what we just saw or what it means, got it?"

"Have I ever let you down?" He asked with a grin.

"Sophomore year." DJ said, hitting his friend's shoulder.

__________________________________________

It was strange for Matt. He wasn't tired at all, and it was like he just woke up from the greatest nap ever. But he still felt exhausted. Every chance he got he would lean on a tree or against a rock just to get a few seconds of rest.

The forest was thick and humid, eventually making him take off his mask just due to the amount of effort of keeping the sweat and humidity from clouding his vision. Pushing the mask to the top of his head, he realized some of his friends were having the same problem with their masks. But none seemed to be as exhausted as him.

With a grunt, he pushed himself off the rock. His small duffle bag and gun getting more and more heavy by the second. He felt a hand fest on his shoulder, turning, he was met with a concerned look.

“You alright, man?” Tyler asked, pulling his mask up.

Matt let out a sigh. “Dude, I dunno. I’m exhausted.” He said. Looking over to Tyler again, he realized his friend wasn’t doing too well either. His eyes had large bags under them while being completely bloodshot. He had a small slouch that others may not have noticed, but having been around the man for over ten years, Matt knew Tyler all too well. “Holy shit bro, you look like crap.”

Tyler let out a small chuckle. “Yeah, you don’t look so good yourself.” Tyler said, grunting as he readjusted his gun while they continues to walk with the group through the forest. “You know, I don’t feel too good about this.”

“About what? The forest?”

Tyler shook his head. “No, wherever we are. This fucking ponyland shit.”

Matt nodded. “I agree. It’s bullshit. But hey, might as well make the most of it. Right?” Matt asked, shrugging while looking at Tyler.

“How do you plan on making the most of it?” Tyler asked.

Matt rubbed his chin. “Well, I assumed that we could get a loan and start some kind of business?” He looked to Tyler. “I mean, we could start a 7-11 or create a bunch of clubs?” He said with a smile.

Tyler started nodding. Then, he frowned. Looking to the front of the group, he saw DJ and Twilight talking. “Eyo, Deeje!”

DJ turned around with a raised eyebrow. “Waddup?”

“Hey, where are we staying?”

“Staying… As in tonight or…?”

Tyler shook his head. “Look, you’ve been here for months now with, from what I can tell, no closer than when you got here to getting back. If this is the case, we need a place to stay until we either go home, or get a home.”

DJ looked down to Twilight. “I can’t afford to house all of them. I barely got enough to rent out that house by the sofa place and get food and stuff. And I doubt Ry can get a job anytime soon. I kinda gave humans a bad name, and I had to work in secret.” He said.

Twilight shook her head. “I have no idea, honestly. Maybe we can find a place for them once we get to Canterlot?”

Tyler frowned. “Wait a minute… What do you mean you have enough to start renting a place? You got a job here?” He asked, curiosity written all over his face.

DJ’s face started to turn a little red. Turning back towards the forest, he shook his head. “None-ya.” He said.

Corben gave a grunt as he readjusted his bag. The large pack filled with low grade explosives was also occupied by three sleeping fillies. “You know, we’ll find out eventually anyways. Might as well just tell us now and get the harassment over with.”

DJ groaned, grinding his teeth a little. “Alright, fine… I’m a massage therapist.”

The entire group stopped to stare at DJ, who let out a sigh as he felt his team’s eyes digging into his skull. “Waitwaitwaitwaitwait, you mean to tell me that you’re a masseuse?” Jose asked, the devil’s smile on his face.

“That’s a bit more sexual than what I do.” He said, keeping his bright red face from his friend’s eyes. “I just relieve muscle tension.”

Tyler tried to stop himself from laughing, but eventually just completely let loose. “Bahaha! Are you serious? That’s what you’ve been doing!” Tyler asked, tears starting to stream from his eyes.

DJ turned to his other linebacker, pointing his finger. “It paid the bills, dammit!” He said.

Shelby smiled. “Oh look at me, my name is DJ, I put my fingers on ponies all day long for money and think I’m Billy Badass a hur du durr!” He said in a mocking voice.

DJ held up his middle finger to Shelby. “Why don’t we get you a box and call that home for you?”

Shelby narrowed his eyes. “You aren’t serious are you?”

DJ shrugged. "Could be.”

________________________

Ryan’s eyes slowly opened as the rapid beeping assaulted her ears. Reaching over, her finger reflexively hit the lock button, postponing the alarm five minutes. She let out a groan, rolling onto her side and pulling the covers over her head. She was never a morning person, and never saw how anyone was. She had heard the rumors of the ‘magical’ coffee, but couldn’t stand the taste.

The second alarm came much quicker than she expected, and made her sigh. Sitting up and grabbing her phone, she rubbed her tired eyes. When her vision finally came into focus, she stood up from the cold floor. Looking around, she eventually found the entrance to the kitchen. She was told to make herself at home, and with a growling stomach, she intended to do just that.

Opening the fridge, she didn’t see too much that was edible. The few things being eggs, milk, cheese, and fruits. Sighing, she grabbed all the items and set them on the counter. She searched through the cupboards for anything to cook with, eventually finding it and a loaf of bread. But before she could actually start making anything, a knock on the door caught her attention.

Not knowing if she should answer it, she just called out for Spike. “Spike…? Someone’s at the door.” There was no response as she set down the tools and made her way to the door herself. “Spike, lazy ass, are you even up yet?” Still nothing. Shaking her head, Ryan opened the door.

Opening the door, a mint green unicorn was searching through her bag. “One second Twilight, I have those books I was going to return real fast.”

Ryan rubbed the back of her head, the group had said they would be back before she woke up. But looking over to the red truck and a lack of a sleeping human in the cabin disproved that pretty quick. “Hate to tell you this, Twilight’s not here.”

The unicorn still searched through her bag. “Well, maybe you could get Spike to ch…” When the unicorn’s eyes met with Ryan, they doubled in size. Then with a quick glance to the red truck, her face grew a huge smile.

“Spike’s out right now, I could put them on a table or something?” Ryan asked, trying to break the silence the unicorn had created.

“Am I dreaming?” She asked, her hoof reaching out to touch Ryan, who took a step back.

“Uhhh, can I just get those books? I kinda need to get breakfast ready.” She said, looking back into the kitchen, where an omelet to be created lay in wait.

The unicorn’s smile grew larger and larger. “I knew it… I knew it!” She started to say.

Ryan sighed. “Listen just give me the books.” She said, holding out one hand while the other rubbed her forehead, trying to ease the quickly forming headache.

The unicorn was slowly walking forward, the books that were in her magic grasp now laying on the ground. “I have soooooooooo many things to ask you!” She said.

Ryan took another step back, reaching to close the door with an awkward smile. “Uhhh, heh, ummmm… We’re closed?” Before slamming the door shut, flipping the lock. She stared at the door for a solid minute, making sure the crazy pony wouldn’t burst through. When she was satisfied that wouldn’t happen, she turned and made for her meal.

Walking in, her pants were almost shat as a loud flapping noise filled her ears, from two inches away. Throwing her arms, she searched for the source of the noise. Her eyes eventually met a small owl, staring back. Smiling, she cocked her head. “What’s your name?” She asked, expecting it too to talk.

“Who.”

Ryan shrugged. “Guess not everything here can talk.”

“Yeah, he isn’t the brightest.”

The new voice caused Ryan to jump a good six inches in the air. Turning to Spike, who was also rubbing tired eyes. Ryan leaned over with her hand over her heart. “Jesus Christ… Don’t scare me like that, Spike!” She said, before letting out a light laugh.

Spike looked into the kitchen, his brain still not working at full speed. “You’re making breakfast?”

Ryan nodded. “Yeah, I was planning on it, Then some weirdo knocked on the door.”

Spike frowned. “What classifies a weirdo for you?” He asked.

Ryan stuck her tongue out at the dragon before walking into the kitchen. “Some… green unicorn wanted to drop off some books. Well, she then s…”

Spike let out a breath of air. “That’s Lyra, don’t worry about her.”

Ryan looked over to Spike. “What, not going to let me finish my story? No way I’m making you an omelet now.” She said.

Before Spike could respond, another knock sounded on the door, accompanied with a ton of voices. His eyebrows raised. “Wow, that’s got to be a record.”

Ryan frowned. “For what?”

As Spike made his way to the door, he looked back at Ryan. “For some kind of disaster, in this case Lyra finding an alien, for everypony in town to run to Twilight.”

Ryan put her hands on her hips. “She’s…. a librarian?”

Spike grabbed the knob for the door and looked at Ryan. “You’re still new here. I’ll have to tell you later.”

Ryan rolled her eyes, going back to her omelette. When the door opened, a familiar voice filled the air. Twilight’s. Rather than getting in the way of the reunion, Ryan just tried to listen in. But before a single word between the pony and the dragon was said, a too familiar voice filled the air.

“What the fuck, how do you listen to this shit?” A voice screamed.

Ryan looked over to the door. “That wasn’t Dustin… wa…”

“Fuck you, man! This shit’s great!” Another voice rang out.

“Kendrick?” Ryan asked herself, walking towards the door. Stepping outside, her jaw hit the floor. DJ and his defense, standing in a circle around the red truck fighting about music. DJ eventually looked over, his eyes getting the size of dinner plates, violently pointing his finger back inside. But Ryan was too confused with the random amount of players that she hadn’t a clue what he was signaling for.

Everything made sense with his next motion. Yelling “Holy shit, dragon!” and pointing at the sky, DJ looked back to Ryan. He took his two hands, placing them firmly on his breasts, and shook them up and down. Frowning, Ryan looked down. Realization hit her like a train.

With only Spike, a baby that had no idea how human anatomy worked, she had yet to change out of her sleepwear. Shorts and a bra.

She started to take a step back, but it was too late. “Seriously, DJ? You c…” Kendrick locked eyes with Ryan in the doorway, his own eyes turning to the size of dinner plates, mouthing “Jesus Christ.”

Slamming the door, Ryan quickly got dressed. But that was probably going to be a conversation starter for a while.

Dark music dealings

DJ sat on the front steps of the elementary school, his blue and black jacket keeping him warm while he used his bag as a pillow. His principal sat next to him, reading a small book. He glanced at his watch. "Dakota, shouldn't your mom be here by now? It's almost four-thirty."

DJ sighed. "She's not my mom... but yeah... but it's Wednesday, and if I don't go, my parents could get in trouble."

He sat his book down. "I think that we should go into my office and call your dad."

DJ nodded as he stood up, grabbing his bag. He and the principal walked back into the school, and into the main office. The principal smiled. "I don't see you in here often."

"Not since the one time last year." He said flatly. The principal smiled.

"Well, let's get you home, shall we?" He said as he sat behind his desk. He punched in the numbers that read from DJ's profile on the computer.

"Home..." DJ said. The dream started flashing images, like from the PC game "Slender," but instead of static and a faceless man, a shotgun barrel, and three ponies continued to flash, until DJ shut his eyes tight, holding his ears, to block out the noise that would eventually come. But none did. He opened his eyes, to be hit in the shoulder in a playful motion.

"Hey, D!" The voice, Wil, said. "You listening to me?"

DJ smiled. "Yeah, what have you got?" DJ opened his Spider-man lunch box, pulling out the contents. "Okay, I got a Twix, Capri-sun, gushers, a lunchable, and a stick of mint gum."

"I have a sandwich, two Zero's, Doritos, and a dollar."

"Alright, I'll give yo..."

"Dakota!" A female voice yelled. DJ's heart skipped a beat, and he lost the color in his face.

DJ turned to the voice. "No..." he muttered.

She had tears in her eyes as she ran forward through the lunchroom. Eyes following. "Dakota! I need to talk to you!"

"My name's not Dakota! My name is DJ!" He screamed at her.

She grabbed his arm. "Don't you scream at me! Do you hear me! I. Am. Your. Mother!"

"You. Are. Not. My. Mother!" He screamed back, trembling in hate, fear, and embarrassment.

She gripped him tighter, later to leave bruises. "We are going back to my car, and we are going home. Understand?"

His hand made solid contact with her face. "Screw you!" He was still not at the cussing age.

"Let's go!" She said, about to rip him out of his seat, when a hand grabbed her shoulder.

"Ma'am, you need to leave. And leave my student alone." The voice, Mr. Conley, his teacher, said.

"He is my son. I have the right to take him whenever I want!"

"Not when he is on a 'parent watch' list, and your name is not on the check-out sheet. And that little thing you pulled in the office will not go without charges."

Before she could say anything, a large man wearing a blue uniform stepped into the room, silver cuffs hanging from his hands. "Ma'am, you have the right to remain silent." He said as he placed the cuffs around her wrists.

"I know my rights...."

As the woman as escorted out of the building, DJ sat in his seat, tears running down his face. He just wanted it all to be over. He couldn't wait until he was older, then he could tell the judge he didn't want to see her anymore, and the judge would believe him. He knew he didn't want to see her, even if he was 'too young to make a decision like that.' As he sat in the chair, he waited for the dream to continue. Get a hug from every person in that room. Waited for his grandpa to come and get him for ice-cream, and to the small building in the city where his dad and mom would be sitting with their lawyer. Where DJ would be persuaded to call her while recorders were held to the speaker and mic. But instead, he felt something on his shoulder. He wiped his eyes, looking at the anomaly.

"Luna?" His eyes focused on the alicorn, who also had tears in her eyes.

"I..."

"Luna!" He looked around. "Thanks," he put a pistol to his head. "Fuck this dream!" He pulled the trigger.

DJ sat straight up in his bed, light pouring in through the window. It was his day off, but he didn't feel like sleeping in. The first thing he did was grab his phone, playing the chosen four songs. Two by B.o.b, one by Eminem, and one by Disturbed. He thought that he would go with the hardest first, then calm down, then blow the brains out of everyone in the room at the time. If he was stuck in this shithole, he wanted everyone to know to leave him alone. And he knew the press would be there. He just wanted the night to come as quick as possible. So he could get everything out of his way.

He walked down to the dining room, wearing his usual get-up. He had his shaker filled, and music blaring as loud as it could go. He was getting ready to kick the guards out of the weight room, save one unicorn, who would spot him. When you have hundreds of pounds hovering over your throat, you want something to keep it from crushing your wind-pipe. As he rounded the corner to the dining room, a single thought popped into hid head. Fuck...

Three alicorns, three unicorns, two pegasi, and two earth ponies conversed with each other, all sharing laughs and smiles. None noticed DJ.

Until he turned to leave, amd his shoe squeaked. God fucking dammit...

All eyes turned to the strange noise. Gasps and wide eyes were all directed at him. DJ clapped his hands together. "I am so sorry to interrupt, but since I have your attention..." He pointed at Rainbow Dash. "Fuck you." He pointed at Twilight. "And fuck you. That is all." He turned to leave the room, when a voice grabbed his attention.

"DJ, would you like to join us? You seem distressed." Luna said. She knew exactly what happened, but hadn't told anypony. And while she told them he was having nightmares, she didn't say what of.

DJ stopped. His stomach growled, demanding to be fed. "Sure, why not?" He said, walking back into the room, taking the seat farthest from any other pony. The waiter came up to DJ.

"Sir?"

DJ held uo his shaker. "Water, and my usual omelet, with toast." He said. The waiter nodded, and left. DJ put his music back in, closing his eyes, and smacking the table to the beat of 'Make It Burn Them' by Skrillex. The ponies all stared at him, not saying anything.

_________________________

Twilight had so many questions running through her head, but not a single one would be answered. And she knew it. No matter how much she wanted to deny it. Her eyes studied the human, taking mental notes of every feature. She didn't notice the human take the things out of his ears.

"See something you like?" He asked, waving his eyebrows.

"Wha... no! I mean... ahhh..." Twilight bit her tongue, red forming in her cheeks while the human leaned back and laughed.

He stopped for a second. "Oh man... you know, I think I know a guy you may like." Twilight cocked her head in confusion. "'Name's Guy Montag."

"Guy Montag?"

"Oh yeah, he was in a book, 'Fahrenheit 451.' He was a firefighter."

"I do..."

"He burned books for a living." DJ said with a smile.

"He... burned.... books?" Twilight asked.

DJ nodded. "Oh yeah, kerosene all over, and set 'em ablaze." The waiter placed the glass of water and food down in front of DJ. "Thanks man." He said. He immediately popped off the lid of the shaker, pouring in the water.

Rainbow Dash looked at in curiously. "What is that?"

DJ looked at his shaker. "A nice glass of nunya."

"Nunya?" Five ponies asked in unison. A pink mare missing.

"Yeah, nunya damn buisness." He said as he downed the nasty liquid and devoured his breakfast.

"DJ..." Princess Celestia said. He looked up.

"What? They set themselves up!" He pleaded.

Celestia sighed. "I believe you have already met everypony in the room. But they may not have met you." She turned to Shining Armor and Cadence. "This is DJ, a guest in our world. However, you may know him as DéJà."

Cadence's eyes got even bigger. "I knew I had heard that voice before! From the spa right?"

DJ rolled his eyes. "Yeah, from the spa." He stood from the table, his meal already gone. "I'm out, I have things to do." He said, standing up.

Twilight couldn't contain herself. "Wait!" She called out.

He stopped. "Yes?"

Twilight bit her lip. "Umm... I was wondering... would you answer my questions?"

DJ just stared blankly at her. "You're joking, right?"

"Well..."

"How 'bout this. You fix my truck, to perfect condition, every horse back in the engine, without a single scratch, I will answer any questions you have. As for now." He made a gesture with his hand, rasining his middle finger. "Hasta la vista. Bitch." He looked up to Luna. "Later, nig!"

Luna grew a big smile on her face as she waved. "Later, cracka!" As DJ made his escape, all eyes turned to Luna. "What? He taught me those terms. See, Tia, Rarity, and Shining are all 'crackas' and I'm a 'nigga.' But he just said 'nig' works!" She said with a giant smile.

All the ponies were confused, then, Rainbow Dash noticed something. "Uh... where's Pinkie?"

_____________________

As DJ continued down towards the gym, he was mumbling "Stuff is Messed up" to himself. He stopped and looked around for a second. Something was wrong. He shrugged and changed the song, getting pumped for the gym. As he looked back up, he felt something. He turned the music up louder, and the feeling was gone.

He thought about what he was going to do for the mini concert. He had everything he needed, they said. All he has to do is ask. He would need a choir, a pony with a deep voice, a DJ, a string orchestra, and a rock band. Lights, bass, electricity, flames, and smoke. Oh, and a chainsaw.

He needed a chainsaw.

He kept feeling something though as he walked, and it wouldn't go away. Finally, he stopped and looked around. "Why do I want to murder myself?" He looked behind him to see a pink mare, her mouth moving a million miles an hour. He slowly took out one of his buds.

"....iewhatsyournamedoyoulikepartieswhereareyoufromiknowyouarethehum..."

DJ's eye twitched. "Go away." He said.

She tilted her head. "Why? Don't you want a friend?"

The last 'friend' here is a bitch... "I want you to leave."

"But I was goi...."

"Let's play hide and seek! I'll count! Ready! One..." he covered his eyes. "Two..." he heard a strange noise, peeking out, she was gone. "Huh, that worked pretty well." He said as he turned around, only to be met with the ugliest fucker he'd ever seen.

'Nice trick you pulled there." Discord stated, clapping a little.

DJ pointed his finger at the deity. "Discord, right? I'm a fan of your work."

"Oh, please. Nopony really is." He said.

"Really? Good thing I'm not a pony." He said, shifting his weight over to his hip. "I've seen you observing me, I'm not blind."

Discord smiled. "Maybe I wanted you to see me, hm?"

An idea popped into DJ's head. "Hey, you going to be at the Gala?"

"Ha!"

"Hear me out, you may be 'reformed' or some shit like that, but I know deep down, you still love to cause a little chaos."

"Deep down? Not that deep." He snapped his fingers, as a vase came to life, rolling on the floor on its own, barking like a dog.

"I know you can do things that break every law out there, political and physical. I have to do some things for this show that I normally wouldn't be able to do."

Discord rubbed his chin. "And what's in this for me?" He stared at the human. "Wow, never thought I'd be in this position."

DJ smiled. "Oh, how about a prank on Celestia, that no one in this damned world has the nuts to do."

Discord wore an evil smile. "Explain?"

"Oh I have a couple condoms, some mayo, my camera, and a bunch of other ideas." He replied, with a matching smile.

Discord stuck out his hand. "I believe we have something in common."

As DJ shook the strange hand he laughed. "That, and we both think Fluttershy's a bitch."

"Alright, which of you pussies is gonna spot me?" DJ looked around the room, seeing a blue unicorn. "You!" He pointed. "Get'cho ass over here!"

The unicorn looked around. "M-me?"

"Yes you! You know how to keep this from crushing my throat right?"

"Well, yeah..."

"Then get over here and do it!" DJ sighed. "For fuck's sake..." He lowered himself onto the bench, under the bar that was bearing one hundred and forty-five kilos. DJ thought it was funny. Weight and fluids were in metric, while, everything else wasn't. Distance, temperature, and all that.

"Alright..." The unicorn said as he stood behind the silver bar.

DJ took in large inhales, and exhaled deeply. Removing any unwanted thoughts. Finally, he shifted his back flat on the bench, rapidly nodding his head. He waited, and nodded again. Nothing happened. He looked at the unicorn. "Uhhh, are you just going to stand there all day?"

"What?"

"Pick the fucking weight up!" DJ almost screamed. The ponies here, save one, had absolutely no idea how to lift, nor know any of the signs of 'Go.' And 'Oh shit.' The unicorn picked the weight off the rack, slowly removing his grasp, letting the weight sink into DJ's locked joints. He took in another breath as the weight slowly fell to his chest, sure to keep his back perfectly flat. As soon as it made contact with his chest, he pushed with every ounce of strength in his body.

"Ooooooooooooone..." He gasped, preparing for the next rep. The weight fell again, a little quicker this time. Once it made contact, DJ pushed. He held his breath, trying to force the weight up, something you should never do. He eventually got it up, breathing heavily. "Two... one more..." he looked at the unicorn. "Scream at me."

"Wh..."

"Just fucking do it! I have one more and I need you to scream at me!" The weight quickly fell to his chest. He arched his back and held his breath. He finally got the weight up, slamming ut into the rack. He rose from the bench, pointing to the unicorn. "Fuck..." *gasp for air* "...you!"

The unicorn just stared at him. Not saying a word. DJ shrugged and left the weight room, he wasn't going to kill himself over someone not getting a good spot. He downed the second part of his shake, silently cursing that he was carrying vanilla instead of strawberry flavor, but glad it wasn't chocolate. He did, however, wish he had been carrying his 'No-Shotgun' pre-workout. It tasted like chalk, but the feeling he would get would have made the three hundred pounds as light as a feather. And no, it's not steroids.

He put his music back in, turning the volume to the max, 'Bombshell' by Powerman5000 coming on first. This was more helpful than that piece of shit... Before the main part could hit, his buds were ripped out of his ears.

"That wasn't funny!" A voice screamed. DJ raised an eyebrow, a purple unicorn wearing a heavy frown.

"Pardon?"

"'Hide and go seek!'"

"Oh yeah, that was good wasn't it?" He said with a smile.

"What were you thinking?"

"Ah, 'you're an annoying bitch the needs to get the fuck out?'" He replied, putting his headphones back in.

Twilight just stared at the creature. "How can somepony be so mean?" She muttered to herself. DJ had continued to walk away from her, and knowing he wouldn't be able to hear her, she followed.

After.a couple minutes, DJ rounded a corner, and a smile grew on his face. He popped out his headphones. "Well if it isn't my favorite asshole. How's it goin, bud?"

Discord walked up to DJ. "I think I have a solution to your little performance problem." He held out his hand, a black ring floating in the middle. "I've decided to share some of my abilities, not all of them, but the basics for your show."

DJ grabbed the ring. "How long does it last?"

"Half an hour after you first put it on." Discord smiled. "Which is enough time to get the hang of it, do your show, and your prank."

DJ shook his head. "This is too good to be true. This morning I woke up in hell, now I'm talking with the devil and... I made a deal."

Discord smirked. "You know, you should let me listen to your selection of music for this evening."

DJ grew a giant smile. "With pleasure."

____________________________________________________________

"Auntie, must we really watch the monster perform while we eat?"

"Prince Blueblood, this is an amazing opportunity for us! To experience another world's music! To learn about their culture and beliefs!" Luna said as they all took a seat around the large opening in the ballroom. "I just wonder what he will be playing?"

Celestia opened her packet. "Well, two songs by a Bob, one by Marshall, and one by..."

Luna looked at her sister. "By who?"

Celestia read it again. "Disturbed?"

As she said that, a pony with black mane and a dark blue body appeared, beating on a set of drums. Everypony was just taking their seats. The six sat next to the Princesses. "What do you think hi..."

Do you feel that?

"...s music will be like?" Twilight asked, looking for the source of the strange noise. Now a pony similar in colors with an electric guitar appeared.

Rainbow Dash leaned back. "I don't know, sounds pretty cool so far."

Ah shit...

Fluttershy tried to hide from the voice in the air. Applejack put a hoof on her shoulder. The human still wasn't to be seen. A third guitar pony had appeared. Then, in a bright flash of fire and light, DJ had his face just inches from Celestia's.

"OH AH AH AH AH!" The music got much louder, and violent. DJ disapeered. Then again, in a bath of fire, infront of Blueblood. "OH AH AH AH AH!"

As he jumped back to the middle of the room, everypony was in complete shock as to what just happened. Luna leaned over to Celestia. "I thought he didn't have magic!"

Discord appeared behind both of the monarchs. "Oh he doesn't, but his ring does."

"Drowning in me sea of loathing

Broken your servent, I kneel

Will you give it to me

It seems what's left on my human side is slowly changing

In me

Will you give it to me"

Celestia turned to Discord. "You gave him magic?"

He shrugged. "Can't hurt anything, can it?"

Mirrors filled the room on the walls.

"Looking at my own reflection

When suddenly it changes!

Violently it changes!

Oh!

There is no turning back now

You've woken up the demon

In meeeeeeeee!"

Flames engulfed the room.

"Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Open up your hate, and let it flow into me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

You mother get up, come on get down with the sickness

You fucker get up, come on get down with the sickness

Madness is a gift, that has been given to me!"

The flames died down, a single spotlight, as DJ walked towards Blueblood.

"I can see inside you

The sickness is rising

Don't try to deny what you feel!

Will you give it to me

It seems that all that was good has died

And is decaying

In me

Will you give it to me

It seems you're having trouble

Dealing with these changes

Living with these changes

Oh!

The world is a scary place

Now that you've woken up the demon

In me!"

The room was once agin engulfed in flames as DJ sung the chorus, poining at random ponies. Then, the room went black as DJ walked up to Luna.

"And when I dream..."

Static filled the air.

"And when I dream...!"

Thw static started to turn blood red.

"And when I dream...!"

Images started to form on the walls.

"AND WHEN I DREAM!" Images from random moments in DJ's life flashed around the room, as he screamed the lyrics in her face.

"No mommy!

Don't do it again!

I'll be a good boy!

I promise!

No mommy don't hit me!

Why do you have to hit me like that mommy?

Don't do it! You're hurting me!

Why do you have to be such a BITCH!

Why don't you just fuck off and die

Why can't you just fuck off and die

Why can't you just leave me here and die

Never stick your hand in my face bitch!

Fuck you!

I don't need this shit!

You stupid sadistic abusive fucking whore!

How would you like to see how it feels mommy

Come on, get ready to die!

DJ vanished in a cloud of smoke, leaving Luna on the verge of tears. He reappeared to finish the song, then he and the rock band, vanished.

Celestia looked around at everypony in the room. Shock across all their faces. Before she could say anything however, a orchestra of string instruments, and the DJ, Vinyl Scratch, all appeared. The strings started playing, and a dark black stallion with a brown mane walked out. His deep voice almost soothing.

"As the war between light and darkness continues, heros and villains become harder to identify. Kindred spirits separated at birth, fighting for their place in time, to be solidified. The clock ticks faster and faster as time runs a marathon, in this Babylon. But, see. The end is only the beginning.

"The beginning of the calm, before the storm."

As he walked away, a voice filled the air.

"I used to dream of success

Now success is inadequate.

It seems the bigger I get

The more they get mad at me.

Cuz there ain't no rules in this fight that we battlin

And there ain't no leftover scraps

You only eat if you capture it

And I swear it's like a fucked up reality

But creation needs a devil

And the devil needs an advocate

I guess

And I ain't too big on duality

But

You think you know me?

You ain't seen the half of me!"

He appeared in the air, no smoke or flames, just there. Duplicates of the ponies appear, clapping their hooves to each other's.

"So BOP!

No gravity

So ha!

Mount Everest!

And the show must go on, yes

But I don't have to act in it.

And they don't make a television that handles the frequencies of my channels

And there ain't no computer that can hack it

It just don't have the capacity

Hell naw that ain't happenin'

You hustle?

Well we are Grand Hustle

Nigga we mastered it

Y'all workin on your bachelors

We ball like we athletes

Drink wine out of chalices on Sunday like we Catholics

And if this is an Embassy

Consider me Ambasador

Official

No artificial preservatives or additives

I love it all

We call this a game because it is exactly"

Two of DJ walked around the crowd as they sung the chorus, but Celestia saw something in DJ. He was thinking on something. And he was really thinking hard, so hard he almost missed his part to come back into reality.

"And it seems like

In the grand scheme of it all

The world's run by a few people

But we never see them at all.

How do they exist if we don't even know who they are?

They could be you!

They could be me!

They could be queens or gods!

Some say that we're slaves

Aliens created us all

From a distant star

Some say through evolution we evolved" DJ walked a step forward, as apes walked out of him, getting smaller and harrier.

"If anything

What you finna see

Is a change

Don't be alarmed

And whoever they are

I say its time we start takin' charge!" A large flag formed behind DJ, a red 'A' with a circle.

"Fuck rules!

Fuck boss!

You can be whatever you want!

You can be a star!

With a car!

And a house made out of gold!" He teleported to right in front of Celestia.

"In the Spring

On the Fall

You can never see it all!

If you don't know what I mean

Have you seen Niagara falls?" At that time, hundreds of gallons of water fell from the ceiling, immediately disappearing. He flashed back to the center of the room.

"Man I swear this world is ours

But I've just been pushed to far!

Now I be in beast mode up on these bars

Freak out a beat

Then beat it out raw

Good God!

If I go this hard

By the time I'm ninety

I won't need viagra, naw

Even if I had a dog.

I'd be a canine

I'd have a ball

Better watch out when you cross my yard

I am a flame

I am the spark

I am in drive

Y'all are in park

Look at my shot

Look at the arc

Look at the crowd soon as I start

Look ay they eyes

And look at they hearts

Two middle fingers

Set at the law!" And DJ proceeded to flip off every royal figure in the room. Luckily for him, they still didn't know what it meant.

"Sincerely yours

For petty your lord

For this is a war

Ain't talkin about bullets and swords

UFOs don't make any noise

When they travel at hyperspeed

So welcome aboard" He vanished into a pile of sand, the wind blowing the remains out the window as his replicas sang the chorus. The dark pony came out once again.

"As the mask of deception falls off the face of humanity unveiling the grim reality of duality in which everyone is a casualty, No one will be exempt. Truth has many shades. It's not a matter of black and white... but gray. Although many, we are one. So in the final analysis, could it be that we are fighting a war that can't be won?"

The ponies, save the DJ, all grabbed their instruments and left the room while the choir finished their number. There was a crash of thunder, and DJ sat in the middle of the room. A straight jacket restricting his arms to his sides. Voices filled the room, then, DJ ripped the jacket off his chest.

"I'm outta my

Outta my mind

Outta my fuckin mind

I'm

I'm It's B.o. outta

My m m m B!

I'm outta outta my mind.

I'm outta my fuckin mind!

Outta my fuckin mind!" The bass hit so hard, Celestia thought the thousand year old murals would shatter.

"I'm outta my fuckin mind

GG gally, oh my

I was doin' fine

Once upon a time

'Til my brain left and didn't say bye!

Don't look at me wrong

I'm outta my mind" DJ wrapped his arms around two other, fake, bipeds.

"Like Nostradamus and da Vince combined

So paranoid of espionage

I'm watchin my doors and checkin' my blinds. My

Brain's on vacation they're tellin me

And I'm bipolar to the disparity

And I need some medication apparently" Electricity crackled through the air as it found it's way to DJ.

"And some electrocompulsive therapy!" A loud pop and bright flashed made everypony wince, when they opened their eyes, gasps filled the room. A large 'NLR' flag hanging behind DJ.

"I am a rebel

But yes I'm so militant

Still I'm eligible for disabilities

I am psychotic

But there is no remedy

This is not figurative

This is literally-y-y

These niggas go dumb I go to the mental facility

Man I so out there I slap fives with E.T.

I don't need a feature...!" DJ clones himself, rambling against his clone as the chorus took over. But what surprised Celestia, was the new biped in the act.

"What's your name, B.o.b?

So they callin' you Bob?

Stop playin' nigga you know I'm known for the bob.

Couple hit songs got you thinkin you're a heartthrob?

Well.this thing so good make a nigga wanna sob

You don't need a feature?

Nigga I'm the feature

You can be the priest

And imma be the preacher

You can be the he-man

And I can be the she-ra

You can be the grimm

And imma be the reaper

And can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?" Shooting stars danced all over the ceiling in the large room.

"Well you really can wish right now

When goons come through and start shootin' stars

You know, I'm all about shoes and cars

I'm kinda drunk off blue Bacardi

I told Baby when I get my advance imma blow it on a blue Buggati" DJ started to drift a blue vehicle through the room until it hit a table, turning into nothing but dew.

"You know I graduates suma cum laude

That's why they thinkin I'm illuminati

As a matter of fact let's kiss and make up

I'll help you escape my blue Ducati

Hallelujah!"

That biped disappeared into smoke as the bass hit and DJ sung the chorus with his clones, this time though, when it was over, he had a paper in his hands.

"I'm out of it. I just can't seem to comd out of it. What's goin on inside of my head it feels like I'm bein' John Malkovitch. Ladies and gentlemen, please turn it down a bit, there's an announcement I'd like to... wait..." He started to study the paper more, causing all the ponies to cock their head in confusion. "How am I supposed to pronounce this shit?" As he said that, the paper burst into flames, the bass hit, and he was inches from Twilight's face.

"I don't need this song!

I don't need this nigga!

Cause a nigga bring the noise like an onomatopoeia.

Leave 'em in the dust all they see is my Adidas" Two bright light started to quickly sneak up behind DJ.

"Nana nana boo boo, wouldn't wanna be ya

Never turnin' back, how you think I got here?

And I'm never slowin' down! Fuck, was that a deer?" At that time, the two lights went sideways and began to roll, smashing into DJ's back, a large smoke bomb almost, and he was on a pedestal in the middle of the room again.

"If you got a problem, step to the office

Matter of fact, talk to the Kioak

Biatch!

You have no idea

That's why they call be B dot!

Been a maniac ever since I was knee high!

Someone call Charter

Maybe call FEMA

Because I gotta be crazy or out of my mind to have this many stamps on my VISA"

DJ wrapped up the song with the last chorus and bass, he turned all the lights on, and held a mic to his face.

"Alright, this next one is for every pony in this room, and this whole planet." He pointed at Fluttershy. "But, I want to dedicate it to the yellow Pegasus in the front row." He cleared his throat.

"When I was just a baby boy, my mama used to tell me these crazy things

She used to tell me my dad was an evil man

She used to tell me he hated me

But then I got a little bit older and I realized she was the crazy one

But there was nothing I could do or say to try and change it because that's just the way she was...!"

_______________________

Edited by Sanity

1 Brawl + 1 Night = Apologies

"For the last time. Fucking no!" Kenny screamed, trying his best to stay as far away from Pinkie as possible.

"Pretty please?" She pleaded as she bounded right behind the human.

Kenny looked over to his group of friends around the campfire. "You bastards aren't going to help me!?"

Kendrick winked at Kenny. "She's all yours, mate."

"You're an asshole. I want you to know that." Kenny said as he continued his evasion.

Kendrick turned behind him at the sound of footsteps. A grin forming on his face. "It's like a bad joke. A pony, a ginger, and two linebackers walk into a forest..."

DJ looked at Kendrick with a tired look in his eyes. "What the hell are they doing?" He asked, motioning to Kenny.

Jose started laughing. "Pink motherfucker thinks Kenny is made of chocolate and wants to try a lick."

Tyler started smiling. "That's fucking funny."

DJ shook his head and started heading over to his small house. Barbed wire strung across the roof and the Limo parked right beside, DJ had never felt more at home. He inserted the four digit code and stepped inside the small shack. Giving a sigh of relief, he tossed his backpack on the bed and started unloading all the unused equipment. Blood, morphine, bandages, magazines, he even tossed some of the extra Stanag mags into his dresser for his secret M4A1 CCO he had hid under his bed. It was Tyler’s favorite weapon, but DJ had found it. It was his rifle. And if for some reason he ran out of AKM mags, that was his backup.

Setting his assault rifle on the bed but keeping the revolver on his hip, he made his way out of the house to see how everyone had settled in so far. Two fires burned bright, about thirty yards away from each other. One with eight ponies all talking and nursing their wounds, one with nine men, talking about how they got there and how long they would have to stay. And in between the two, was a man being chased by a pink pony because she thought his skin would taste like chocolate.

DJ shook his head and started walking over to the pickup, grabbing multiple cans of beans and coke. Walking over to the girls first, he set the cans on the ground along with the drinks. “I’m going to assume you’re all getting hungry.” He asked, receiving a few nods.

“What do you care?” Said a very pissed and still broke Rainbow Dash. Her eyes shot daggers at DJ and any human that got anywhere near her and her friends, mainly due to the fact that one put a bullet in her and still refuses to give her morphine to fix her leg.

“Look here, I know you don’t like me, and we haven’t got along in the past. But in a survival situation, which we are currently in, I have to put all past grudges behind me to keep everyone around me alive. That means anything that happened in Equestria between me, you, Joe Bob, and Richard Fist, doesn't matter anymore. If you are going to hold a grudge, that’s fine, I don’t care. But if it hinders my ability to keep any one of you ponies or those guys over there alive, me and you will go round and round. Do I make myself clear?”

The entire camp had gone quiet, even the second campfire. The only sound that could be heard was Kenny trying to keep Pinkie off of him while pinned to the ground, her tongue poking out of her mouth. All eyes were on Rainbow Dash and DJ.

“Yes.” She said, through grinding teeth.

DJ gave a nod, and turned back to his team. Tossing the food on the ground, he took a different approach. “Eat up.” He simply said, before taking a can of beans and coke to his limo, leaning on the vehicle, and eating the cold, tasteless, meal. But it was a meal, and every single member of the two groups were alive.

Corben looked over to Tyler. “What crawled up his ass and died?”

“Turns out, orange one does not like the Praga. I’m gonna guess she doesn't like flying in general. He had to tie her down to the chopper before we could leave.” Tyler popped open his coke, taking a long sip. “He got a few cuts and bruises, maybe a few rope burns.”

“Ouch.” Corben looked over to Kendrick and gave him a small nudge. “Hey, how’s gay pride over there reacting to the bullet in her ass?”

Kendrick groaned, putting his face in his hands. “She probably wants to stab me.”

Shelby shrugged. “We got painkillers and bandages in a videogame.” He turned to Kendrick. “We could always just get it over with?”

Kendrick glared at Shelby. “Hey Shelby, you know what? That’s a great idea! I’ll just willingly get stabbed and bleed out on the forest floor.” Kendrick threw his empty coke can at Shelby. “Shut the fuck up.”

Shawn looked over to Kendrick. "Hey man, why the hostility?"

"Fuck you, ginger."

Shawn raised his middle finger. "Fuck you too, Arrowhead!"

The player's camp erupted in laughter. Tyler held up his hands. "Guys, calm down now..."

Corben nudged Tyler. "Just let them do their thing, Rollingpin."

Tyler slowly turned to Corben. "Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

Corben held up his hands. "Sorry, didn't know you'd get all butt-hurt over it!" He said with a demonic smile.

Each of Tyler's knuckles gave a loud pop. "You better shut the fuck up."

Trevor gave a small laugh. "What's wrong, Tyler? Was it a one night stand?"

Colton started smiling. "Trevor. Freshy year."

Trevor turned to Colton. “Really, you want to go there, Shady?”

_______________

"Are they arguing again?" Scootaloo asked, pointing to the now hostile human camp.

"All they ever do is fight each other." Sweetie added in.

Rarity looked at Twilight. "It's true, even when the three brought us here they argued. And over the most ridiculous things!"

Twilight rubbed her chin. "You know, you're right."

"What are they even arguing about?" Rainbow Dash asked, straining her ears.

"I didn't know she was a fucking lesbian!" Trevor screamed at Colton, veins popping in his neck. "Besides, only bitch you've fucked was that whore from Little Axe!"

Applejack reached over, using her hooves to close Applebloom and Sweetie's outside ears and squish the inside on Scootaloo's ears. "They curse an awful lot, that's f'r sure."

“Guys, shut up.” DJ said from his position. He held the look of a concerned father; trying his best to remain emotionless, but hints of emotion poking through.

But the volume continues to rise. Some of the humans tried to calm the others down, only for them to be dragged into the rage as well. Fluttershy slowly started to make herself as small as possible. “I’ve never seen anypony so angry.” She stated, barely audible.

Twilight was about to say something, when a loud pop rang through the air. Turning her head just in time, she watched as an all out brawl erupted from the human's camp. Trevor landing a hit right under Colton's chin, Kendrick putting Shawn in a headlock, Corben and Tyler circling each other.

Before Twilight could get up however, a loud explosion filled the air. “Enough!” DJ screamed, holding the smoking revolver in the air. “This is pathetic!” He screamed at his team. “You are all precision killing machines, but get pissed off when someone mentions something years ago!” Any concern DJ had was then replaced with anger.

Twilight perked up her ears to hear the conversation.

“Bu...”

“I don’t care anymore!” He screamed. “I know that this is the most hypocritical thing ever, but you all need to grow the fuck up! I didn't handle my Equestrian experience well and I'm ashamed of it! But now, we are all in the same boat. Quit fucking rocking it.

"Who gives a fuck if you banged a whore, you hit up a drunk lesbian, your dick looks like an arrowhead, or you got a rolling pin shoved in your ass! We need to survive, and to do so, we need to forget all of that. Trust me on this."

“It didn't get ‘shoved in my ass’!” Tyler screamed.

“Bull shit it didn't! I was the one that did it at football camp, dumbass!” Corben said with a smile. “All because you wanted to see if your butt hole opens when you fart.”

Tyler turned to Corben with his arm cocked back. But before the explosive blow could fly, a hand grabbed his elbow. “Tyler. Corben. Stop, now.” DJ said as he gave Tyler a shove and Corben a glare. “Anyone else want to smart off? No? Good, now, we obviously need to get a couple things sorted out. How we got here and where we are sleeping.”

“Fuck you!” Shelby screamed, holding his Makarov up to DJ. “We all know it’s your fault we’re here!”

“Explain to me how it’s my fault?” DJ said looking over to the lineman, gripping his revolver tighter.

“Well...”

“Exactly, shut up.” DJ said while walking towards Kendrick who had let Shawn go. “How many tents do we got?”

“Set up or stored?”

“Both.”

“We got about ten up right now with five stored in the APC. We also have the eight houses, the levels one and two for each of us.”

“Perfect. Girls get the houses, we get the tents.”

“Why the fuck do they get the houses?” Shelby asked, pointing to the mares.

“Number one, because they deserve a sturdy roof after what they've been through today. Number two, it’s just the right thing to do. Number three, I don’t want your smelly ass anywhere near my bed and I’m positive neither do they. And number four, because I fucking said so.” DJ said as he started walking towards the APC for the other tents.

“And when did we vote you the leader of this group?” Shelby asked with a smug look on his face.

“This isn't a democracy.” DJ said as he searched the APC for a more powerful firearm as well as the tents. “This is a dictatorship, and I’m head dic.”

“Shelby, just shut up and sit down. DJ has more experience than any of us in DayZ, and I highly doubt that you have more than he does.” Dustin said, tossing down his empty can.

“Why do you guys just let him push you around?” Shelby asked, throwing his hands up in the air. “It’s stupid! Why should he be the one to m...”

*CRACK*

Shelby’s eyes rolled into the back of his head as the 7.62 round entered and exited his torso. Kendrick lowered his DMR and sighed. “When will he learn to shut the fuck up?” He asked, laying the weapon on the ground and grabbing his bandages.

“Nice shot.” DJ said with a wink. “Glad to know you haven’t lost your touch.”

“Are you serious? I can pop a zombie from a kilometer away with this thing and you think I lost my touch at five meters?”

DJ gave a shrug. “Just saying, glad to know you still know how to shoot that thing.” DJ turned to see Twilight with a look of horror on her face. “Hey, Captain, what’s up with you?”

“Captain?” Shawn asked with a look of confusion on his face.

“Yeah, Captain Sparklez. You know, the YouTuber?” Colton said to Shawn.

“I don’t watch YouTube, I have Walmart internet.”

Twilight shook her head then looked up to DJ. “He almost killed him, and you compliment him?”

“He wouldn't shut up. And he didn't almost kill him, just knocked him out and brought him down to half blood with a little bleeding. He’ll be fine when he wakes up tomorrow.” DJ said, checking his watch as the sun started to set. “Alright, let’s get everyone situated."

Kendrick gave a small sigh. “Too bad I can’t just tab out like usual when you do this stuff.”

Twilight looked over to Kendrick. “Tab out?”

“It’s complicated.” Kendrick said, waving his hand.

“No it’s not!” Pinkie said from her restraints. “Tabbing out is when you are playing a game and hold alt and tab, letting you do other things while the game is still running!”

Kendrick and DJ exchanged glances. “The fuck is she talking about?”

“Like Mr. Maine right now is tabbing between Chrome, Teamspeak, and his Steam games!”

DJ rubbed the back of his head. “I think she just explained what tabbing out was.”

“How the f... I don’t wanna know.” Kendrick said as he made his way to the APC.

______________

Rainbow Dash tossed and turned in her bed. She couldn't find a comfortable position among the firm mattress, and her still broken leg. not to mention her still burning hatred for the humans gnawing at her. She couldn't believe that they had not only knocked her out, but wouldn't even fix her leg! She even saw the ‘leader’ grab every one of the tubes Fluttershy said fixed her legs, and put them in his back so she couldn't sneak one out.

Eventually, Rainbow decided she would get out of the bed and see if she could convince DJ to give her one. Rolling out of bed and onto the floor, she began to crawl out of the house. When she opened the door it was almost as if someone had put a rag over her eyes. The only things she could see were the stars and where the trees blocked out the sky. Pitch black she gave a sigh, looking for some kind of indication to where he or his bag may be.

Looking to her right, she saw a small light coming from a doorway of another house. With nothing to lose, she slowly started her crawl. She didn't remember who was in which house, but she did remember that everypony did have a separate house except for the fillies, who were going to all share one.

As she got closer to the light she decided it wouldn't hurt anything to just peek inside. Rounding the corner, her brow started to twitch. DJ was on one knee, talking to the three fillies. Straining her ears just a touch, she started to listen into the conversation.

“Are you sure they won’t get us here?” Scootaloo asked.

DJ gave a small laugh. “Positive. And just to make sure they won’t get anywhere near you three, I will be sitting right outside in the big blue truck outside. I’ll make sure none of them get anywhere near you.”

“Mah sister told me you were a meanie...” Applebloom said, covering her face with the blanket shared by the three.

DJ gave a slow sad nod. “Yeah, I used to be a meanie. And some people think I still am...”

“Damn straight!” Trevor screamed from his tent.

DJ shook his head with a smile and continued. “I realized today, that my actions have been unnecessary. I haven’t been the nicest guy in the world, mainly because of a fan-base of a myth back in my world. I realized today, I have been mean to all the wrong people. I shouldn't have acted how I did to anyone I met in Equestria. It was wrong of me. And I know I won’t be forgiven, because I wouldn't forgive someone like me.”

“But... are you really sorry?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“I am really sorry, and I can Pinkie promise on that.” DJ said, standing up to his full height, and grabbing his weapon from the floor.

“Well, maybe if ya tell them y’er sorry, they’ll forgive ya?” Applebloom suggested.

“Thanks for the idea, but I still don’t think they’ll forgive me so easy. Especially after tomorrow.”

Sweetie frowned. “What’s going to happen tomorrow?”

“We are running low on supplies, and we need a lot more food. Unfortunately, nothing in this world is free. I am going to need all of you to help get some food and drink.” DJ leaned back on the wall. “We are going to have to load everyone up and head over to the docks, hopefully by then we can find out why we aren't in Equestria anymore.”

“Well that doesn't seem so bad.” Scootaloo said.

DJ just gave a sigh. “It doesn't seem like it. But, when we get there, I will need you girls to do me a huge favor okay?” The girls all nodded. DJ took in a deep breath. “When we get there, I need you to keep your eyes shut, and plug your ears. Don’t ask why just do it.” DJ looked down at his watch. “It is way past y’all’s bedtime, I need to go. Like I said before, I’ll make sure none of those things get anywhere near you. If you need me, I’ll be right outside.”

Rainbow Dash began to crawl backwards away from the light as DJ made his way out of the house, turning the light off and shutting the door. Letting out a sigh, DJ pulled the large black things over his eyes, and clicked the button on the side, causing Rainbow Dash to look at him with a bewildered look on her face. Looking around, DJ stopped when he saw a body on the ground.

“How long have you been there?” He asked.

Rainbow Dash kept quiet, making herself as small as possible. ‘There’s no way he can see me! It’s pitch black!’

“Rainbow Dash, I can see you laying there...” DJ said, walking towards the truck. “so I’ll ask again, how long have you been there?”

Rainbow began to crawl over to DJ. “Long enough." She said, raising her voice. "And if y...”

“Don’t get pissy with me yet, I was about to come find you.” DJ said, reaching in his bag and pulling out the morphine tube. “I think I was a bit harsh earlier when I bitched you out over the morphine. You want me to inject it, since you can’t see anything?”

Rainbow glared at DJ before she gave a slow nod. DJ opened the tube, going to grab her leg before she jerked back. “I was a massage therapist back in Canterlot, do not make me lock up your body so I can do this.” She gave a small nod again before DJ grabbed her leg and shoved in the needle.

DJ tossed the needle to the side, and leaned against the truck. Rainbow stood up, flexing her leg out. She gave had a large smile, then wore a frown as she turned to DJ. “How can you see but I can’t?”

DJ tapped the metal object on his face. “Night vision goggles. For me right now, everything is a bright green.”

“What was that about supplies you said to them?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well that’s one way to change a subject.” DJ said, stretching out his legs. “There are some docks just west of here that spawn all kinds of goodies: Mags, food, drink, metal, tires, pretty much anything you need to survive the zombie apocalypse.”

“So why do they need to cover their ears and eyes?”

“Because, the place is usually crawling with the bastards. So, Kendrick, Tyler, Corben, Trevor, and Colton, maybe some others, and I, will clear it out.” DJ held up his Sa-58. “And with Jenny there, it’s gonna get pretty messy pretty quick.”

Rainbow Dash looked over to DJ. “Are you really going to be here all night?”

DJ gave a nod. “I always have the night shift here. I've shot many a bandits whenever everyone else is asleep.” He turned to the mare. “And you should be asleep, it’s way too late for anyone to be awake right now.” He said as he flipped a small switch on his weapon. "Go back to bed."

As Rainbow made her way back to the house, DJ made his way over to the human tents. That were once again in a debate.

"No it's fucking not!" Shelby said to Kendrick. "That's not a common household item!"

"Yes it is! Literally everyone here has one at home!"

“Bullshit!” Shelby screamed. He looked over his shoulder just as DJ walked over to their camp. “Hey, asshole, tell them that it isn't a common household item!”

DJ frowned. “Well I don’t know what it is...”

Kendrick let out a long breath. “A tennis racket.”

Giving a nod, DJ looked back down to Shelby. “Of course it’s a common item.”

“What the hell do you use them for?!”

“Wasps and bees.” Colton said, chewing on one of his crossbow bolts. “The racket flies through the air with little resistance and chops the bastards to pieces.”

“Still, if I were to go door to door and ask for a tennis racket, people would give me one?”

“Well first off, you live in an apartment complex, so it’s less common. It’s a household item, not an apartmenthold item. Secondly, they wouldn't just give it to you, they would let you borrow it. And lastly, every house has one so they would think you were stealing it from them.” Trevor said.

“That is fucking retarded.” Shelby said with a grunt. “You Oklahomans are weird.”

_______________________

*beep beep beep beep*

DJ stopped the small alarm on his watch. The sun was just cresting over the small group of islands as DJ shook his head. He was tired. The last time he remembered actually going to sleep was back in Canterlot when he and Ryan were getting ready to leave the city. Standing up slowly, he made his way over to the first house, occupied by Rarity. Banging on the door and wiping the crap out of his eyes, he waited for a response.

“Don’t you know I need my beauty sleep?” The voice from inside called out to DJ.

“You can sleep when you’re dead, right now we need to get everyone up and ready to move.” DJ said through the door, and heading off to the camping tents.

When he arrived at the tents, the humans laid all over the floor. Sprawled out on the small padding of the beds. Chambering a round, DJ pointed his rifle into the air and pulled the trigger.

“BANDITS!” Tyler screamed, jumping to his feet, only for his head to slam against the ceiling. “Ah, dammit.” Grabbing his M4, he slowly rolled out of the tent. “Alright mother fucker, where ya hidin’?”

"Right here.” DJ said, walking back towards the houses. “Get everyone ready to move, we’re raiding the docks in thirty minutes.”

Tyler rubbed his head as he and the rest of the team started to get out of their beds. “Why the fuck are we raiding now?”

DJ sighed. “Because I’m fucking tired and just want to get it over with.”

Kendrick shrugged as he picked up his DMR. “Sounds good to me. Taking the girls with us?”

“Well we can’t leave them here.” DJ said as he tossed the keys of the yellow and blue Urals to Tyler and Corben. “You’re driving. I’m gonna nap on the way.”

DJ took in a deep breath as he walked around the yellow Ural. “Hey, Twilight, can you talk and walk with me for a minute?”

Twilight frowned but did nod. Hopping out of the Ural next to the human, the two started walking to the opposite time of the camp.

Kendrick gave a small sigh of boredom. He wanted to start a conversation, but didn't know how. Until across from him, he heard a familiar tune. "Dustin, you hummin' what I think you're hummin'?"

Dustin gave a small smile. "Depends on what you think I'm hummin'.,

"Lock and load, gotta drop the clip

These Nazi zombies are comin' too quick

No time to waste, we gotta kill these fools

We can survive if we follow these rules!" Kendrick sung with a smile.

From the front seat came another voice. "Rule one, put your back to the wall

Rule number two, don't trip and fall

Rule number three, be accurate, straight aim for the dome and unload the clip!" Trevor sung.

“What did you want to talk about?” Twilight asked, looking up to DJ.

DJ looked down to Twilight. “A few things actually.”

“Oh?”

“First off, I had a conversation with a few fillies last night. They gave me a suggestion, and I thought they were crazy”

“What was the suggestion?”

“They suggested I apologize.”

Twilight’s face twisted into a large frown. “What’s crazy about apologizing?”

DJ sighed. “That’s not the part I thought was crazy.” He said. “The crazy part was that you would accept it.” The human looked back down at the unicorn, a hint of sadness in his eyes. “I know that if I were in your shoes, I would tell you to fuck off.”

Twilight began to smile a little. “Why wouldn't we accept your apology?”

“If an alien dropped into Noble, and acted like he owned the whole country with his advanced tech then somehow or another drug me into a hell hole like Tavianna, I would be damn well pissed. Then if it tried to say ‘sorry’? No way in hell.”

Twilight started to smile a little more. “It’s alright. Some of us keep grudges longer than others. We just need to learn to forgive and forget.”

“You see, that’s hard for me. I always remember what people do to me and my family...” DJ motioned at his team. His family. “...and it’s hard to forgive when you never forget.”

Twilight nodded. “I und...”

Putting his finger up to Twilight’s mouth, DJ glared down at her. “Don’t fucking say you understand what I mean unless you really do. That is my biggest pet peeve.”

Twilight nodded before continuing. “I know what you mean. But after all you've done for us here...” Twilight waved her hoof around. But not hearing the subtle whine. “...I think it’s fair that we should accept your apology. And we should thank you for all your help here. For all the food, shelter, and entertainment.” She winked while motioning to Pinkie who was in a heated debate with Matt about cupcakes and muffins.

“DJ nodded, “Thanks. I can promise you, I won’t be as big a dick as I was back in Equestria. That was wrong of me. Now for the other thing I wanted to talk about.” DJ sat down on a small stump. “What do you remember before you woke up near Kameni?”

Twilight scratched under her chin. “Well, after you almost killed the manticore and hit Shelby...”

“After that, did you see anything? Feel anything?”

“Well, for a second I thought I felt a bit drowsy. And I remember a kind of mist coming fro...” Twilight’s eyes turned to the size of dinner plates as she looked up to DJ, remembering the spell she had learned in the early days with Celestia but never mastered it.

“We’re asleep.”

As DJ was about to respond, a noise filled his ears. His eyes filled with anger once again. "Who the fuck started up the chopper, we're rolling with the Urals..." He said, before marching over to the growing dust cloud.

The difference between living and dying, can be just a couple seconds.

DJ started walking towards the two other players. Kendrick and Tyler, their fists were flying in a mad furry to bash the other's face in. Normally, DJ would sit back and watch the fight. But now wasn't the time. They were just days away from the state championship game against Guthrie. Kendrick was small, but knew how to flow and cover if the end would peel off. Tyler was bigger, not by much though, but a little. He knew how to fill the hole. DJ got closer to the Sam and Willie backers. He reached his arms out, fist grabbing Tyler by the right shoulder, throwing him to the ground, then turning to Kendrick, placing his hands "right on his tits" as his coach told him back during freshman year, playing as a linemen. DJ stared into Kendrick's eyes. "You need to calm down!" He looked back at the backer on the ground. "And you too! This is ridiculous!" He threw Kendrick on the ground. He looked at the O and D line. They were suppressing giggles. "You think this is funny? We are just days from the most important night of our lives!" He looked over to the backers lying on the ground. "We are seniors, dammit! This is our last chance!"

"But h..." Kendrick started.

"I don't care what he did! You two need to pull your head out of your ass and get to work! I couldn't give two shits if you never talk to one another in a week, but this is now!" His voice rising. "This is a multi million dollar stadium! Thousands of dollars of equipment! Years of practice and training, and you two are acting like you just got the memo! We will be the first Noble football team to win a state championship!" He looked over to the coaches. "They want it just as bad as we do!" He looked back down at the two backers, starting to get up. "You want it, right?"

"Of course!" They said in unison.

"Then act like it! Damn..." He said as he tightened the straps on his helmet. DJ wasn't just another backer. He was the middle linebacker. The Maniac. He was responsible for the whole field, and everything on it. He was six foot four, two-hundred and twenty pounds. He had a killer instinct, he was a head hunter. He would be your best friend in the world, but if you were on the other side of the ball, he would hate every fiber of your being. Just for wearing the wrong colors. That's all he was. A hateful monster. But, he wasn't a brainless jock. He was in the top five percent of the school in academics. But, being as Noble was a school full of drugs and people who just didn't care, it wasn't a hard task.

The coaches noticed DJ had stopped talking, and took this as a chance to teach their positions. Barrett walked over to the linebackers. "Alright, what happened before you two went at it?"

Kendrick spoke first. "It was a counter, to the left. I didn't read the line, only the backfield. The QB lied. He dropped back, and I followed, only to realize my mistake, but I already took two steps, I had to regain myself, then started for the ball, following my path, but slightly curved."

He looked over to Tyler. "You?"

"Same, I kept my eyes in the backfield."

The coach looked at DJ. "What happened?"

"As much as I hate to blame it on others, I saw the pulls, immediately flowing. However, the D-end didn't get hands on their read. The linemen hit me, I had little time to fight him off, and I did, but I was already a second behind where I needed to be."

Barrett nodded. "Run it again!" He yelled, which received an immediate 'yes sir!' and the shuffling of players to their proper places. Barrett looked at the band on his wrist. "Let's go Black 9."

_______________________________________________________________________

"I'm so bored!" Princess Luna said as she flopped onto her bed. With all her royal duties done, she had a couple hours to kill. She rolled over, covering her head with a pillow. "There's nothing to do!" While yes, the bars and clubs were open, it wouldn't be proper for the princess to go there. I could always prank somepony? No, did that last night. Maybe rearrange the stars? No, too much work. I could steal Tia's cake? A smile formed on her face. I've got it! Tia always uses her magic to detect disharmony, then she helps the pony out! Her smile got even wider. I'll do even better! I'll save something from another world!

Luna hopped out of her bed, and started for the library. She started to sing a little phrase. "Tia's gonna be proud of me, Tia's gonna be proud of me!"

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DJ laid in the bed of 'Lil' red,' his 2002 Chevy S10. The little truck had done so much for him. In the spring, summer, and early fall, they would spend hours driving all over, mowing the lawns of multiple people. He smiled at the thought. He was making hundreds of dollars in a few hours, one day a week, while his friends were making minimum wage at Kanes and McDonalds. They worked all week, spending countless hours taking orders and flipping burgers, while DJ was either at the gym, sitting at his desk with homework or film, or in his gaming chair, staring aimlessly at the screen, watching as the ships would fly past the AA gun he usually manned in Planetside 2. But, it was Monday. For an hour every Monday, around ten, he would drive behind the railroad tracks, past the baseball fields. He put is tailgate down, and laid back. Staring at the moon and stars. Mainly the moon.

It's silver surface giving light to the dark world. Sure, it was really the sun's light, but if it wasn't for the magnificent piece of rock, there would be no way the sun could reach the dark side of the Earth. It almost made me smile. Perfect teamwork. It's idiotic! Two rocks work together better than eleven men on a football field. His thoughts stopped when he heard vehicles approach his truck. He sat up in the bed, he saw a black and blue Ford Raptor, and a green Pontiac Firebird. He almost laughed. What are these idiots doing out here?

Corben and Tyler hopped out of their vehicles. "Dude, it's like, ten thirty! What are you doing out here?"

"What I do every Monday. How the hell did y'all find me?"

"We asked Momma." Corben said. He shook his head. She knows I like to be alone.

"So what are y'all doing out here?"

"We texted you, asking if you wanted to hop on PS2, but you didn't reply, so we decided to hunt you down!" Tyler said.

"By asking my Mom?"

Corben started laughing. "We told here we thought you were in trouble!" "You guys are assholes." He said as he stood up, going to grab his phone from the cab. Damn, thirty missed calls...

"So what are you doing out here?" Tyler asked, leaning against his car.

"Just amazed that two rocks can work together better than eleven men. Well, three rocks if you think about it." The moon's gravity and water levels.

"So, want to head back? Some bitch ass platoon was tryin' to take our biodome in Amerish when we left."

He laughed. "If it's the same platoon as last time, you don't stand a chance against their air support. Yeah, I'll head home."

Corben took the phone out of his pocket. His face dropped as he started a little hop to his truck. "They just brought in three squads. We gotta go!"

He laughed as he hopped in his truck. Amazing, we collaborate better as a team when a virtual base is being taken then when someone is running with a football. He looked up at the moon, still there, still shining bright in the sky. I am kinda upset I didn't get to lay there longer.

"Left side, two transport ships." Corben's voice came over.

His mouse swipped on the pad, wipping the guns around. "On it, two transport ships. You forgot to mention the TR fighter tailing them." He pressed on the mouse, the red X appearing on the screen. Eventually popping up the kill points. "One down, one to go. Anyone got a lock on the fighter?"

Blake's voice came in. "I got a rocket headed his way." About that time, a rocket slammed into the side of the fighter, bringing a large cloud of smoke.

"Fighter hit." The second transport blew into pieces as well. "And transport is down. How you guys doing inside?"

"They got a max in here somehow! And it has three engineers!" Tyler's voice cried out.

"If there's a medic, take him down, then the engineers, then the max! Come on man, this isn't the first time they've got one in here."

As night descended on the virtual continent, he couldn't help but notice the night sky. He usually passed it off, but this time, he moved the guns to observe the night. Much more colorful. Much more... he spun the weapons around, hitting a landing transport, some players ejecting early, trying to maybe survive the fall. None of them did. Violent.

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Luna smiled as she found exactly what she was looking for. A book containing an ancient spell, one that could open a portal to a new dimension. And the spell Celestia used to find sources of disharmony. I wonder what thing I will save? Or what I will help! She started bouncing up and down. She could barely contain her excitement.

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DJ walked into his physics class. His music blaring at maximum volume. The violen and bass mixture giving him a calm feeling, but still energizing him for the next night. He could barely sleep, and was hoping on getting some sleep this hour after the few problems he had left to do. As he walked through the doors, his teacher almost sprinted by him. He gave her a weird look as he walked into the class. He dropped his bag by his desk, turning to the unusual occupant in the desk behind his.

He wasn't just sitting there, oh no! This was Noble! The kid was having violent seizures in the chair, drool coming out of his mouth. DJ took the headphones out of his ears. "What's up with him?" He asked.

"Pills, we're guessing he OD'ed on Oxycontin."

He looked over at the student, his body locked up right as he looked at him, his head slamming on the desk. DJ just shook his head. "Idiot."

Coach Barrett, the principal, and the teacher all entered the room. "Y'all need to go to the gym." He said as he and the principal wrapped their arms around the student.

"Need any help, Coach?" He asked.

Soloman looked over at DJ. "No, you need to go to the gym."

DJ just nodded his head. "Yes sir."

DJ made his way to the gym. His bag slung over his shoulder, music still blaring. Being fourth hour, it was freshman lunch. DJ took a seat near the exit. He didn't want to be bothered. He took out his physics work, finishing the last few questions, and laying his head back. The bass was pounding his ears. At this rate, I'll be deaf by age twenty. He felt a tap on his shoulder, his left eye to view whoever was disturbing his nap. He took out his left bud. "Hello?"

The kid was wearing a blue hoodie, with a yellow lightning down the middle. The hood had... ears and goggles? His shirt had a mint green unicorn, sitting in a weird position. Under the pony, the word. 'Believe.' "Are you new here?"

He kinda laughed. "Not quite. Been here for a while. Can I help you with anything?"

"Than why haven't I ever seen you in here before?"

"I'm not a freshie, buddy." He gave a weak smile. "Senior."

"Really? Are you going to college? Where are you going? What do you do for fun? How has your day been?"

He put his hands out. "Listen, as much as I would love to answer all your questions, I would really like to catch up on my sleep."

"Oh! Okay! I'm sorry!" He held out his hand in a closed fist. "Brohoof?"

He stared at the kid for a second, turning the music in his other bud down. "I'm sorry?"

"You know, brohoof!" He demonstrated by hitting his fists together.

DJ sighed. "Listen, I'll fist bump you, but I won't brohoof you." He couldn't stand bronies. He had nothing against the show, but it was the community that got on his nerves. Random pictures on websites with 'I'm a brony! Got a problem with it?' And it annoyed the hell out of him. So much, that he actually went back, watching every show in their series, even the most recent of season three. Why did he do this? For ammo. He would target the weak, newer bronies, using information from the show to back his arguments. Oh how he loved to see people pissed and confused as to what happened. "Fist bump?" He asked again.

The kid sighed. "Fine, fist bump."

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Luna started preparations for the portal. It would require a massive amount of energy, but she could do it! She knew she could! She placed the enchanted gems on the floor of her room in their correct places. Luna looked at the strange drawings on the ground. She took a deep breath. "Come on, Luna! You can do this! If Tia can, you can!" Her horn started to glow, raising the gems from the floor. A small blue dot forming in the center. Luna started to smile. "It's working!" Right as she said that, the doors to her room opened.

"Lu-Lu, how wa... what is that?" Celestia spoke in her calm voice. The blue dot quickly vanished, and the gems fell to the floor. Luna sat there panting.

"Tia! I almost had it!" She complained.

"Luna, what were you doing?" Celestia walked into the room further, observing the gems and symbols.

Luna hid the book under her flank as she sat on the floor. "Nothing..."

Celestia's eyes widened as she recognized the symbols on the floor. "You were trying to create a portal!"

Luna looked down. "Yeah, I was. I was just trying to impress you!" She cried out.

"Lu-Lu, you don't have to impress me." She wrapped a hoof around her sister. "Besides, this is very dangerous. You never know what kind of thing could come through!"

"I guess you're right..." Luna said. That doesn't mean I won't try tomorrow! She hid her grin. Tomorrow was going to be very interesting.

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DJ's heart was pounding. Faster than it probably should. He sat at the locker with his stuff, in an alien locker room. The music blaring in his head. His 'angry' music. He kept his eyes straight ahead. He girdle was starting to itch, but he ignored it. He was trying as hard as he could to remember every defensive play. All ten. The blues, greens, and blacks. The blacks being his favorite. He usually blitzed on a black play. He looked down at his wristband. Damn, I mixed blue two and green five again...

He felt a fist hit shoulder, he looked up, taking his buds out. "Hey, Coach."

Coach Allen stood over him. "You ready, bud?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah, just nervous is all."

He slapped his head on DJ's shoulder. "Just do your job, and trust everyone else to do theirs, and you'll be fine."

He nodded again. "I understand. It's just..." he looked around the room. "This is most of the senior's last game. I have a scholarship to a small college. Yeah, it's small, but who cares? Still free school!"

Allen let out a breath of air. "Yeah, that's true. But hey!" He started to walk away. "At least they left their mark!"

The team formed a circle around the four leaders. DJ, Kendrick, Corben, and Tyler. They started their chant. Their ritual before every game. "Dear, Lord. The battles.we go through life."

"Dear, Lord. The battles we go through life."

"We ask for a chance to spare."

"A chance to equal our strides."

"A chance to do or die."

"If we should win."

"Faith and honor held high."

"If we should lose."

"We'll stand by the road."

"And cheer as the winners go by."

"DAY BY DAY!"

"WE GET BETTER AND BETTER!"

"SO WE CAN'T BE BEAT!"

"WON'T! BE! BEAT!"

Everyone jumped up, screaming. You could feel the energy coming from the players ready to do whatever they could to win the ballgame. DJ put his helmet up in the air. "Seniors! This is it! Our last game! Let's go out with a bang, shall we?"

He got an "Oo-ra!" As a reply. Most of the players were joining the Marines after highschool. They don't have anywhere else to go but the military. While DJ did still have the Air-force in the back of his mind, he still wanted to either fly private aircraft or design video games and do networking.

"Alright! Let's show these Guthrie bitches we mean buisness! Bears on three!"

The whole team erupted. "One! Two! Three! BEARS!"

The team started jumping all around, ready to go. DJ on the other hand, he had a mission. He made his way over the biggest D-tackle. He grabbed him by the shoulder pads, looking him in the eye. "I swear to God, if you do anything stupid out there that will jeopardize this game for us, I will personally beat the living shit out of you!"

He gave a smartass look to DJ. "I'm an Atheist, your threat doesn't affect me."

"Fine. I swear to science, you ungrateful douche." He pushed him away, leaving the linemen to sink in what was just said. DJ walked over with his fellow linebackers for the coin toss. They decided they wanted to receive first, let the offense set up some points before defense would hold them back.

It was gonna be a hell of a game.

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As Luna's eyes opened, a smile formed on her face. In just one hour, she would prove to Celestia that she too could save things in a state of disharmony! It would also help her image, as many of the Equestrian citizens still feared her. If she could save something, it would make her look like a hero. She hopped out of the bed, getting the enchanted gems and chalk. I know I can do this, Tia knows I can too!

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Fourth quarter. Score 14-17, Bears winning. Ten seconds remaining. Guthrie had the ball. Third down, on the five yard-line. DJ was about to explode. His heart was pounding, adrenaline pumping through his body. Cuts on his arms that were wrapped, just well enough for him to continue to play, but would easily get infected. He didn't care, as much as he loved scars, he would want it to get infected, so he could pick at the scab, leaving a story on his skin.

DJ looked over at his coaches. Barrett was pointing at the ground, while Allen held up five fingers. DJ nodded. "Green five! Green five!" The call echoes through the field as every player repeated the call. DJ looked down at his band. "Alright, base it is then." He lowered himself down as the QB got under the center.

"Motion!" Kendrick called, DJ' eyes darted to a receiver running across the field.

"Watch the fake!" Tyler screamed.

The QB started the count. "Ready, ready! Blue ten.... bluuuue ten.... seeeet. Go! Go!"

DJ watched the linemen. Their steps were not in the forward aggresive motion, but instead, a backwards motion. This signalling a pass. "Pass! Pass!" DJ yelled, dropping back into coverage. DJ's eyes saw what the receiver was doing, he planted, heading at a forty-five degree angle towards him. "Bubble! Bubble!"

"Got him!" Tyler screamed. His body slammed into the receiver, two yards in the backfield. The receiver dropped the ball. "Ball!" Tyler yelled, reaching for the egg shaped ball.

The whistle blew. "Damn..." DJ said under his breath. An incomplete pass. DJ looked over to the sidelines once again. This was the last play of the game. His coach pointed to his hat, while the other held up one finger. "Blue one! Blue one!" He yelled. The QB came back up to the line in shotgun. "Ready! Ready!"

DJ ran up to his line. "Don't jump! Don't jump!" He screamed, returning to his spot.

"Seeeeet.... Go! Go!" The QB yelled. Not a single person moved. He looked over to the ref. "Timeout!" He said as he made a T with his hands. The whistle blew, and the teams ran to their sidelines.

DJ held out his right hand, which was quickly filled with an ice cold water bottle. He squirted the icy liquid down his throat, easing the pain in his burning throat. He closed his eyes, letting the water run down his face and jersey. Chills formed on his body when a northern wind blew across the field. He heard voices, but wasn't listening. He knew what to do. He knew where his fit was. The short break ended, DJ handed the bottle back to one of the managers, and ran back to the field.

He eyed the formation, recognizing it immediately. "Trips! Trips! Check forty-two! Check forty-two!" He yelled, pushing Kendrick over into coverage. DJ looked at the QB. Try it and see what happens.

"Ready! Ready!" This is it! "Green eight! Green eight!" He's gonna do it! "Seeeeet.... Go! Go!" The offensive line took a hard step forward and to the right. DJ followed exactly. He saw a hole start to form as the QB tucked the ball into his arm. Huh-uh, bitch! Not in my gap! DJ planted his right foot, shooting straight through the B gap. Fear entered the QB's eyes when the backer broke through, untouched. Then, both players made a potentially deadly mistake.

They lowered their heads, colliding head on.

DJ's butterfly collar absorbed most of the blow, but his brain still shook in his head, colliding against his skull. The QB however, was not as lucky. He lost consciousness immediately. DJ drove him to the ground, his feet still kicking once the two slammed into the ground. He opened his eyes, a smile forming on his face. We did it!

DJ stood up, trying as hard as he could to hide his new condition. Come on, you were able to hide a broken back and torn hip for months, don't let a hard hit stop you now! He was thrown to the ground by his teammates. Smiles all around.

The locker room was filled with laughter and tears. They did it! The first Noble football team to actually win the state championship! While all the other players rejoiced, though, a single player sat with his headphones in, a smile on his face, tears in his eyes. We did it.... we really fuckin' did!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Luna started up her horn. The gems started floating once again, the blue orb forming. You can do it, Luna! The portal was at its maximum size, a large blue hole. Nothing on the other side. Just blue. Alright, now, to find a source of disharmony! Her horn grew brighter, allowing different colors to come from the portal. It was eventually fully open. "A forest?" She looked at the strange portal. Then, a deer hopped in front of it.

"I thought I made a portal to a different world?"

As the deer started to walk away, the portal followed closely behind. The deer's head then shot straight up, looking into the distance. What do you see? Then, four wolves started running for the animal. Luna' face was filled with fear and excitement. So I will still save something! However, the deer was not pulled through the portal. Instead, it continued to follow the animal, until it jumped over a wire fence. Wait, did that have spikes on it?! As the deer ran, another noise became present. On the black smooth surface, the portal shifted, revealing two bright lights. A machine of some sorts. The machine tried to turn away from the animal, but one of its wheels hit a hole in the smooth surface. It started to roll, coming straight to the portal. As it neared, Luna realized she was in immediate danger. She jumped out of the way, cutting off her magic, but not before the portal emitted a loud pop. The machine rolled into the room, slamming against one of the walls.

Luna stared in horror as the portal closed and the gems fell to the floor. The machine was red, and had four wheels. It had a small amount of white smoke coming from the front end. Its noises had stopped, except for the occasional small pop. She started to walk towards the machine. It was a mess. Dirt covered half of it, while scratches covered the rest. A machine is a source o... her eyes got as wide as the moon when she heard a faint groan. She inched closer to the front. The shattered glass revealed something. Luna didn't know what it was, but it had a look of pain in its face. Blood trickled down the side of its head. Luna started to run from her room, towards Celestia's, screaming her sister's name.

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DJ let out a small sigh. Can't even see straight, this shit isn't safe... He shook his head. Gotta prove a point. Can't let Shelby know I got a concussion. Shelby was one of his good friends, but didn't play the same sports. Shelby wrestled while DJ played football and ran track. Shelby didn't play football, mainly because of the amount of concussions he had received in both sports. But wrestling was to Shelby as football was to DJ.

Their life.

DJ heard a small ringing noise, he reached down, grabbing his phone from the passenger seat. What does he want right now? "'Ello?"

Corben's voice came over the cell. "Hey man! We're headed over to Shrabe's for a party, you want to come?"

"You know damn well I don't party." "Come on man! We just won state! You can't say you don't want to!"

DJ laughed. "I'm fucking tired. I need sleep!"

"Don't be a pussy, bitch ass, nigga!"

"Shut the fuck up, Corben! You're a fucking cracker! I'm going home and going to bed, fuck you! Oh, and tell Shrabe I said hey!" He clicked end call.

DJ's head was spinning as he sat behind the wheel of the 2002 Chevy S10. The usual blaring speakers were silent. He had a destination. Home. And he'd be damned if he let the most important night of his life, and the biggest hit of his career stop him from laying in the soft bed for his dreams to be filled with the flashy ring. The ring champions wore. And he was a champion. He smiled, closing his eyes to think of the ring. What would the booster club put on it? Would it look like his class ring? Would it have his name or number on it? He opened his eyes to see a deadly sight. A deer. Jumping a fence. Heading right into the road. He tried to swerve, only for his truck's tire to hit a large pothole. He felt the vehicle go airborne. The roof of the cab caved in, just centimeters from his head. The truck continued to roll as he heard a loud pop, he assumed were the airbags. The vehicle came to a rapid stop, smashing against something very sturdy. Very hard. As he lost consciousness, he heard a voice. At first, he thought it was God. But it couldn't be? God wasn't a women. The voice yelled the same thing over... and over... and over... getting farther and farther away as his world turned to a black abyss.

"Tia! Tia! Tia!"

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Edited by Sanity