My Little Princessby pyromANarchistChaptersChapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 1My Little Princess "Who want some more punch?" Pinkie asked everyone, bouncing as she did, as they tucked into a delicious slice of cake. For a while there was just the sound of munching and a happy "mmm" of approval. It had been a great party. It was all Pinkie could do after Twilight said she had something really important to tell everyone. They had gathered in Applejack's barn and decorated it in true Pinkie style. After some music, dancing and party games they had all enjoyed a meal and now were eating cake. "Ah might have some, if there's some goin'" Applejack said in reply to the question. Pinkie waded through some streamers and poured a generous helping of purple punch in the empty glass. "Anyone else?" she asked, glad to be of service. "No? ok then" she said as she sat back down. She looked at Applejack and gave her a wild look that said 'go on, now!' "Ah believe Twilight had something to tell us all, something really important. Go on Twi, tell us." she said after finishing a mouthful of confectionary. Twilight was still finishing one last mouthful when Pinkie exploded. "Ooh ooh wait, let's guess! Errm hang on, ooh yes that's it, you got an A in your last test? No wait, that's not it, you are getting your mane permed? No, you're building an extension to the library? Did I get it, was that it? Or..." "Pinkie. No, that's not it. I do have something really important though. Something that could change everything." Twilight said, not quite sure how to word what she had to say. Everyone in the room looked on with tense expectation. "Go on..." they all said at once. "I am becoming a princess. An Alicorn Princess. Celestia told me in person, at the gala, but I haven't had the... The guts to tell you all. We will still be friends..." she said, nervous of their responses. There was a ghastly moment of silence. Accompanying it was the sudden feel of shock from the group. It lasted just a millisecond, just long enough for Pinkie to pull the trigger on her party cannon. A loud cheer erupted from the group, and the moment passed without anyone noticing. Broad smiles of warm adulation adorned the faces of the 5 happy friends. They happily chatted about how it came to be, that Twilight, their friend, had been made a princess. "I'll show you the letter, it's with Spike where is he anyway? I'd better go get him, he's probably up to no good" Twilight said as she walked to the door "I'll be right back!" and she was gone. The 5 ponies looked around the room at each other. No one was smiling. The awkward feeling returned. "This really couldn't get much worse could it" Rarity stated frankly. "She's going to leave us behind" she said, with a tone of voice that showed nothing less than absolute seriousness. "I don't get it. I put all my effort, literally all, into joining the Wonderbolts, and she just gets the whole thing handed to her on a silver platter. That's just not fair" Rainbow Dash said with more than a hint of sadness in her voice. "An am here bustin mah gut out in the field, an what ah get for it? Jus enough to get by. Thats all. Why does she get everythin?" Applejack spouted in righteous anger. "But she'll be gone, and even if he stays she'll be too busy to come to any parties and that would just be bad, and with all her responsibilities no one will see her as much and then we won't be bestest bestest friends anymore" babbled Pinkie with no coherence and tears forming at the corner of her eyes. Only one pony wasn't mortified by the news. That's because Fluttershy had a plan. It was such a simple plan, yet it would work. It was perfect. It was genius. She knew how to make everything better, like how it always had been. How to get rid of all this Alicorn nonsense. But instead of saying it out loud she simply spoke in her usual quiet tone. "I mean I understand why she is a princess, I just don't understand... Why" the other ponies all agreed. "The one thing we can't do is tell Twi. Honestly ah tell you it's for the best" Applejack explained. A murmur of agreement arose from the others. Twilight chose that moment to burst into the room levitating a scroll just ahead of her. She looked around the room at her friends happy, beaming faces. "I found it!" she said. Time passed. Not one of the 5 stepped out of character, or gave any impression of their worried anger over Twilight's new role in Equestria. Soon the party was over, and one by one the ponies left the barn and went home. Applejack watched as 5 ponies became silhouettes in the dark and vanished. What she didn't notice is that Fluttershy wasn't going home. If she had maybe what horrors and nightmares that were to be might not have happened. Something cracked at the party, something that should have stayed put. This is what happens when a mind cracks. Twilight walked home full of cake and delicious punch. She was on top of the world. She had just been to a great party, been with great friends and despite the shocking news no one had overreacted, not even Pinkie Pie. She thought her life through. She had great friends, great neighbours, she was becoming a princess, a princess! And she would be that little bit closer to Celestia. Things couldn't be better. She strolled home with a heart full of joy. The smell of the evening and the beautiful moonlit countryside made an intoxicating aura. In the distance she heard the clip clop of a pony and the rattle and shake of a heavy cart. She though it was slightly odd that a pony would be dragging such a heavy load as that at this time of night. Still, as happy as she was, she didn't think much to it. She rounded a blind corner and everything happened at once. Twilight didn't see what happened, she simply felt a colossal whump as a black cloud of nothing enveloped her mind. If there had been somepony around to see it, as indeed there was, they would have seen the stallion pulling the heavy cart cross a T junction at the exact moment Twilight chose to. The stallion had already passed but the corner of the massive cart struck her square in the head as she aimlessly meandered long the road. The stallion, pulling the heavy load that he was, didn't notice as he effectively ran over a future princess. One pony did notice though, and her name was Fluttershy. Waiting like a predator, she flew down from her vantage point in the trees and stooped next to the body, caressing the bleeding, half conscious head and half whispering sweet nothings into Twilight's ear as she dragged the heavy body to her home "There there, it's ok, I've got you, it will all be ok..." Twilight woke up in a dark, barely lit room. There was a terrible pounding in her head. It throbbed and pulsed. She recalled what had happened, the cart, the... Voices? Who was it? She didn't know. She opened her eyes to try and make better sense of her situation. She appeared to be in a dusty basement. Whoever it was rarely came down here. She was lying on a dusty yet comfortable sofa. Here and there was a few things scattered about that seemed out of place. Crutches of all shapes and sizes, small wheelchairs for mice, and rows upon rows of medicine bottles. Medical equipment. She desperately tried to remember how she got here. She remembered seeing through half open eyes the familiar outline of a pony. Fluttershy. She was in Fluttershy's basement. Now it made sense. But why would Fluttershy take her here? Why didn't she take her to the hospital? She supposed she had better find Fluttershy and find out. She tried to get up. Twilight realised with shock that she could barely move. It was like her body weighed a tonne. Every move she made took enormous effort. It felt like someone had strapped cement bags to the ends of her limbs. After struggling for some time she rolled off the sofa and came crashing onto the grimy floor. The impact shook her as her limp body fell awkwardly. She lied there for several seconds contemplating whether she actually could find Fluttershy if she tried. She tried standing up but was too weak. Slowly, she crawled along the dirty floor, inch by inch and with tremendous effort. She reached a set of stairs that seemed to be the only way out of the room and listened. There was dead silence. She crawled up the stairs one huge step at a time. The bare wood scratched her as she made her way up the clifflike slope. After much struggling she made it to the door. She reached up and turned the handle. Locked. She tried unlocking the door with magic, but like her body, her horn was unresponsive. Only a dim glow came, not even enough to lift a pencil, let alone unlock a door. She tried her hardest, but nothing happened. After all this effort it remained locked. She had fallen at the last hurdle, defeated by a door. Now what? All she could do was wait for Fluttershy to come. She could be here for hours. Then without warning a quiet but clear voice rang out from the darkness "Hehe, I was wondering how far you would get." came the disembodied voice. Twilight jumped. It seemed to come from directly above her. She looked up to see Fluttershy hovering silently above her. At the staircase the ceiling rose and there waited the canary coloured Pegasus. Watching like a vulture, she silently waited for Twilight to give in to her futile struggle, grinning the whole time. Twilight watched now as she floated noiselessly towards her like an angel. As she got closer she saw an unnatural demonic light behind her bright, dewey eyes. It was clear from the very aura the came from her that something was wrong. It made Twilight's fur stand on end. She was holding a spoonful of deep yellow liquid and gently stroked Twilight's body as she offered the medicine. "You're very ill, Twilight. You need to rest" she softly spoke, watching as the consciousness drained from her friend. Twilight couldn't do anything as she was dragged under by the effect of the drug. She thought it odd that Fluttershy would knock her out like so, but before any other thoughts could be processed, she was gone. Twilight came to on the same sofa in the same room. Immediately her mind was awake, yet her body still wouldn't respond. As she stirred, a shape moved in the shadows. Fluttershy lifted her head, and noticing Twilight was awake, she got up and quietly strode over to the purple unicorn. She sat down on the floor next to the sofa so her and Twilight were eye to eye. Twilight was the first to speak. "What happened?" "You had an accident. A cart hit you, you knocked your head so I took you home. I'm taking care of you. I'm going to look after you." Fluttershy still spoke gently, yet differently. It was the hollow, chilling tone that crept in her voice. It had a haunting quality to it. The demonic look came into he eyes as she said the final two sentences. Twilight noticed these things but refused to believe that it meant anything. It couldn't mean anything, could it? "When will I be better?" she asked. There was a ghostly silence again. She asked again "When can I leave?" she said, more insistently this time. Fluttershy didn't respond for a while. "I said I'm going to take care of you." she said as if it answered her question. "I don't understand, when will I be well enough to leave?" Twilight replied, the first signs of panic rising in her mind. "I'm looking after you now, Twilight, I'm taking care of you... Your mine." she said, the last words barely a whisper, yet crystal clear in the dead silence. "I know you're looking after me, but when can I get back to the princess? I have a lot to do, and the coronation is coming up soon. I need to get back as soon as I can." she said, doubts forming in her mind as to Fluttershy's intentions. Half of her saw something else in the young Pegasus, something dark, yet the other half couldn't believe that Fluttershy would be doing such a thing. "Your mine... You can't leave. I'm taking care of you, looking after you" came the ice cold whisper of a reply. Twilight panicked. "No. Fluttershy, why? I need to leave. Princess Celestia needs me, I'm a princess. Spike needs me, you don't want to hurt spike, do you? The princess will find you. You'll be found out. Please, just let me go." she spurted in nervous panic. Fluttershy seemed to stare beyond Twilight's face, beyond the wall and into the open universe behind her. "It came to me at the party". Her eyes focused sharply on Twilight as she paused. "You were moving on, Twilight. You were becoming a princess. I realised then that you would be Celestia's. Not mine. You were always mine, Twilight. I always cared for you, even when you didn't notice. Even when you couldn't possibly have seen I was looking after you. I didn't want you to be Celestia's, I wanted you to be mine. So now you are. All mine. I'm looking after you now, not the princess. I'm taking care of you." the words came as if saying what she had to say was difficult, as if she was expressing some deep inner triumph. Her eyes drifted to the unseen universe and Twilight struggled against the drug that bound her so tightly to the sofa. Fluttershy was so intensely staring into the void that she didn't seem to notice when Twilight rolled off the sofa and crawled along the floor. Not that she needed to. Not that she could have escaped if she tried. Twilight saw the door and knew from Fluttershy's lack of interest that is was locked. She sobbed on the floor, finally admitting defeat. Fluttershy returned to the present and silently slid over to Twilight's heaving body as sobs wracked her body. Twilight felt a sharp jab as a hypodermic syringe was injected into her flank, and saw black envelop her vision as she was taken under once again. When Twilight awoke Fluttershy was gone. Her body still wouldn't work. What now? What would she do to her? How long would she be trapped here? What did Fluttershy want from her? All these questions and no answer. Author's Note I don't own MLP. And you can be bloody thankful of that fact. Chapter 2MLP chapter 2 Hours passed. Nothing happened. Nothing other than the continually recycling chain of questions that wore on her mind. Everything had happened so fast, Twilight had a hard time realising just what had become of these last few hours. Being alone for so long after what had happened with nothing but thoughts to keep company slowly drained Twilight's sanity. Slowly, but surely, her imagination ran away with her mind. In the silence she began to hear something. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. The distant hammering rang out in Twilight's head. It sounded like machinery of some sort. What would Fluttershy be doing with machinery? She listened again. ThudThudThudThudThud It was still there, now faster. Twilight lay wondering for a few seconds before curiosity got the better of her, but to her confusion, as she lifted her head up, the noise vanished. That confused her. Was Fluttershy watching her? She lay back down and scanned the room. ThudThudThudThudThud The noise returned, even faster. Then she realised. If Twilight could have moved easier she would have kicked herself. It was her heartbeat. She felt rather foolish upon reflection. She tried to relax again, but despite the worry being over, her heart refused to slow down. Out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw a shadow move. She jerked her head to look but saw nothing. She turned back, suddenly feeling a dread come over her. On the shelf just at the edge of her sight, something was staring at her. Again she jerked her head but saw it was only a bottle. Fluttershy had given her the creeps. Seeing such a lovely pony such as Fluttershy in that state was a shock to say the least. It was the eyes, she was sure. The way she seemed to stare straight through her. Being alone for so long in the absolute silence scared her too. Fear began to take over Twilight's mind. Something moved again. Twilight tried desperately to resist the urge to look. In her mind she knew it was nothing, but the more she tried not to give in to the desire, the more it pulled. It moved again. She looked. She was right. It was nothing. Something else moved. Twilight felt her skin crawl as if an army of ants was running across her. She closed her eyes tight and put a foreleg over her face in a vain attempt to shut out the imaginary sensory assault. In her mind she saw the shadows creeping around her. She opened her eyes in time to see something flicker behind her. She turned to see nothing. What did she expect? What DID she expect? Goosebumps ran up and down her skin under her fur. Was that a cold breath of air? Why was their a breeze inside? Twilight couldn't take it anymore. She rose off the sofa, raging against the drug that kept her still this long, and let out a weak scream. "Heeeeeeelp" Her cry barely echoed around the empty room. Did she hear someone calling out to her? No, it was just her echo. Or was it? No, it WAS. "Aaaaaargh" She half ran, half fell towards the wall, the effects of the drug causing her to sway and stagger like a drunk. She pounded the wall using all of her sapped strength. All it did was make a few soft patting sounds and she slumped to the floor. Weakly she spoke out loud "Just let me out" She sobbed on the floor for a minute, but all that did was give her a numb leg from the cold hard floor. She dragged herself back to the dreaded sofa and lay face down, curled up in the tightest shape she could make, and prepared a mental barrier against the horrors of the room. She listened to the silence that was the only thing she could be sure of. She lay there for several minutes with a blank mind. Twilight thought she felt a presence near her. She blocked the thought before it could run away with her mind. The presence was still there in Twilight's mind but she ignored it, willing it to go away. "Twilight?" spoke Fluttershy, her quiet voice sounding loud in the cold silence of the room. Twilight jumped with an almighty jolt that, if it wasn't for the drugs, would have skyrocketed her to the ceiling. How could she have snook up to her like that? There was absolute silence in the room, she would have heard a drop of water fall, yet she hadn't heard a thing. Like a ghost, she was just there. Twilight half expected her to just fade away into nothing like an apparition. She was hovering silently just a few inches from the floor. Completely silently. She was holding, balanced delicately on one hoof, a tray with a plate full of food and a glass of deep yellow punch. "I got you some food, Twilight. Don't be scared." she reassured her. For a few achingly long seconds Twilight just stared blankly. "How did you get here?" she finally asked, realising after she said it how stupid the question sounded. "Why, the door..." she replied, voice trailing off at the end. An idea struck Twilight. An idea that could end all the misery all together. Twilight considered running. The drug couldn't keep her from trying. Even if she had locked the door she could get the key off Fluttershy. What could she do anyway? She could easily overpower the slight pegasus. Fluttershy was weak and helpless after all. Several awkward seconds passed, tension building in the atmosphere between the two ponies. It wasn't until Twilight looked into the eyes of her opponent that she realised she could never bring herself to do it. She knew she could escape that way, but Fluttershy was her friend. Even at this dire time she just couldn't. Years of loyalty made her stop and think about attacking her, even when she had been attacked herself. And yet this could be her chance to escape. Her life could be in danger of she didn't act now. Her mind was a battlefield of conflicting thoughts and feelings. Fluttershy seemed to stare straight into her eyes with an innocent, slightly troubled look. She seemed perfectly content to just sit there and watch the thoughts spin around Twilight's dizzy head. Twilight tried magic again, in desperate search for a way out not including violence. Nothing happened. She had to run. Still, as he turned to Fluttershy and looked deep into her eyes she couldn't bring herself to hurt Fluttershy. Yet she could still try running. She looked away and geared her mind up to bolt towards the door. Fluttershy placed the tray on the floor and turned to leave. She felt her heart beating out of her mouth. She might just have one shot at this. She waited a few precious seconds to put distance between her and Fluttershy. There was now at least ten paces between them. While she was looking away Twilight shot up out of her chair and ran with a surprising turn of speed. No sooner had she taken two steps when Fluttershy, swift as lightening, jabbed a syringe deep into her neck, threatening to kill her outright. Twilight choked at the sudden impact to her neck. Fluttershy had closed the gap between them just a few milliseconds too quickly. How did she move that fast? It was almost supernatural. She felt her body fall in a heap on the floor. "Please don't try to run. I kind of knew you would, but I'm trying my best to look after you. Don't make this any harder than it needs to be, I don't want to hurt you" came the soft voice, the words seeming to be spoken directly into her head as she lost consciousness. 'This is starting to become a theme now, isn't it?' she thought as she blacked out. When she awoke her food was cold. She still ate it hungrily, she hadn't eaten since the party that suddenly seemed so distant in the past. She chugged down the punch, but saved some just in case she felt thirsty later. As she finished the meal the reality of her situation dawned on her once again. She was stuck here, with nothing to do, imprisoned by what she could only describe as a maniac, waiting for something to happen and completely at the mercy of some complex drug. How could this have happened? Well, she knew how, but not why. Twilight suddenly felt alone. She felt alone in a way that she had never felt before. One moment she had everything going for her, and the next, she had everything taken away from her. She wanted to cry again. How long was this going to last for? Surely someone would notice. Maybe Fluttershy would give it away. She hoped and prayed that someone would find her soon. It had been just a few hours and yet it had already taken it's toll on her mind. What would Fluttershy do to her? What did she want? She shuddered at the thought of possible answers to those questions. What did the future hold? She thought about her failed attempt at escape. Escape was impossible. Not with Fluttershy the way she was. There was no other door, and the one grimy window was behind thick metal bars. She probably didn't have the strength to break it anyway. She was trapped, in the greatest sense one could ever be trapped, but she knew worrying wouldn't do anything. She felt completely hopeless, and yet, she knew that with that attitude, she was. Despite everything, Twilight knew she must stay strong. Worrying would only get her to the sorry state she had been in before the meal came. She would not let Fluttershy's madness make her give in. She would refuse to let her win. She would stay strong, for Celestia. No more of that shadows moving nonsense. She just had to stay calm and not panic, then she would be ok. Just not loose her mind, and then she would be fine until someone came to rescue her. She had to find something to do, something to occupy her mind. She looked around the room and saw the shelves. There was a few dusty books, old veterinary textbooks. Well, what else was there to do? Twilight lost herself in the book. As she read, she became so engrossed in the material, she forgot her predicament. She managed to relax a little. All she had to do was keep her head while she waited for Celestia to come and rescue her. She had every confidence that Celestia would come, or at least someone, so much so she didn't feel the need to question it. To her it wasn't a question of 'how will I leave' as much as 'when will I leave'. And of course the question of will she keep her sanity until she does leave? Later that day Fluttershy came into the room again. She held in her hoof two small pills, and a glass of clear water. This time Twilight heard her coming. "Hey Twilight. It's late now. You should probably get some sleep. Here, I got you something to help you" she said, offering the pills. Twilight looked from Fluttershy to the tablets, then back again. "Fluttershy, why are you doing this? Why can't you just let me go?" asked Twilight. "Because I want you to be mine. If I let you out then you wouldn't be. I didn't realise how much I wanted you until I nearly lost you. I'm not going to let that happen again." explained the canary yellow Pegasus. "But we were still going to be friends..." "But you weren't going to be MINE. You were going to be Celestia's. I wanted you, all of you. Not just what was left." Fluttershy interrupted, with a loud, harsh tone in her voice that Twilight had only heard her use against a dragon that one time. Twilight looked on, shocked. Fluttershy noticed and she continued in a softer voice. "I don't want to hurt you. These are to help you get to sleep." she said, motioning to the pills. "I hope they help" she added as she got up and left Twilight couldn't make any sense out of Fluttershy's actions. She didn't seem to want to hurt her, and yet wanted to keep her imprisoned in her basement. It just didn't make any sense. She wasn't hers. She was her own person. What did she mean by being hers? Like as a pet? She was a pony, not a pet. Why did she have to do that? "Fluttershy. I'm not yours. I'm my own pony. You can't have a pony as a pet. It doesn't work like that. I don't want to be here, you can't own me" Twilight desperately explained, her voice raised Fluttershy stopped and slowly turned around. At first she looked viciously angry, but she slowly grinned a sadistic, maniacal grin "Oh no Twilight, I think you'll find I can have you. And I will have you. Despite your best attempt you are still here, and you will be for a long time". And with that she left, the heavy door thudding into place. Twilight raged in her mind. She wasn't hers. She wasn't. She would show Fluttershy that. She would make sure that no matter how long she was here she would not be scared as she had been that first time. Eventually all would be good. She swallowed the pills with the refreshing drink and went back to reading on the sofa, hoping to nod off fairly quickly. After about fifteen minutes Twilight realised she might be enjoying herself slightly too much. The text started to swirl around the page and the usually dim colours of the room seemed unusually bright. Her head started to sway and spin. Despite the strange and slightly frightening experience, it didn't feel in the least bit displeasing. It felt amazing. Suddenly Twilight was forgetting everything and getting completely caught up in the moment. The ecstasy grew higher. Nothing else mattered to Twilight at that moment. Not even her imprisonment meant anything anymore. She was on top of the world. She was the one. It was thrilling! She never wanted to come down off the almighty high. Colours danced and flashed in front of her face. Rainbows did somersaults over sparking shapes. Twilight just rolled over onto her back and enjoyed the show. After a few hours, the colours started to fade. Twilight was flat out on the sofa, her body and mind completely relaxed. As she came off the upper, she quickly fell into a deep, undisturbed sleep. She awoke late the next morning. At first she felt embarrassed at how juvenile she had thought under the influence of the drug. Then she felt foolish that she had been tricked that easily. Then she felt stupid that she had enjoyed herself so much when she was in a situation as bleak as this. It felt so good, like nothing else she had ever experienced. She thought maybe Fluttershy would bring the drug again... No. No way. She knew how bad it was. She wasn't a junkie. Heck, what was she thinking about? She had been kidnapped, drugged repeatedly and now was trying to tell herself she wasn't a druggie. She couldn't let herself be drugged like that again. Fluttershy was just messing with her mind, and the truth was, it was working. As she tried to move she found once again her body was under the influence of the dreaded drug. Breakfast was already there, and she ate and finished off the juice she had saved. It was when looking for a new book to read that she discovered the notepad, with a pencil. Twilight had an idea. Using the pencil, she engraved two tally marks in the wall behind the sofa. She then turned her attention to the notepad. She wrote at the top of the first page: 'Day 1'. She chewed the end of the pencil contemplatively, and then furiously scribbled the events of the day. She then began 'Day 2' before burying herself in the book. Hours passed. Lunch came and went while Twilight patiently awaited rescue. She waited, and waited, and waited. It would come eventually. She would just have to wait. Fluttershy came again with another meal, and later once more. This last visit surprised Twilight, until she remembered the two small pills she had held in her hoof the previous night. Her stomach sank. She knew how good she would feel, yet she knew she didn't want the drug really. She had already made it up in her mind. She wasn't going to let Fluttershy mess up her mind like that again. "I'm not taking those pills, Fluttershy. Not after how you tricked me yesterday" Twilight called out through the dim light that she had grown accustomed too, but Fluttershy struggled to see through for a moment. "I thought you might say that. That's why I put it in your drink, I just came down to see that you'd drunk it, that's all" "Aaargh. Why would you do that? I thought you wanted me? Don't you want to look after me? Why do you keep doing this? This is going to kill me" she shouted. Fluttershy just smiled, then grinned again "It will be ok Twilight, it will be all ok" And she left. Already Twilight felt the oncoming effects of the drug. Soon she was just a heap of unconscious pony lying flat in the sofa. From then on things fell into a routine. Meals, books, and nightly Fluttershy would find a way of forcing two small pills into Twilight, and the ballerina of colour would begin, and end as always with unconscious sleep. Many lonely days passed, but Twilight kept writing her diary, at first to keep track, then out of habit, then later just to stay sane. Chapter 3MLP chapter 3 Day 3: Another day alone. It's hard to imagine I've only been here three days, it feels like weeks. I'm still keeping healthy though, Fluttershy seems to feed me well, although the continuous drugging may cause side effects upon rescue. Day 4: The meal was drugged again. At breakfast I told her I will refuse the meal. At this Fluttershy promised me that she wouldn't drug it so long as I ate. This backs up my previous theory that she doesn't mean to hurt me, she just wants to keep me, almost like a pet. The endless tedium of not having anything to do but read is beginning to wear on my mind. Fortunately Fluttershy brought more books, novels this time. I hope the variation helps, but I think it's just prolonging the inevitable. Day 5: I should have seen that one coming. Fluttershy insisted I took the drug. By that I mean I had no choice. It was either I took it or she injected it. She wasn't violent, I think that's why she relies so heavily on drugs to hold me in the first place. It was like a sick parody of getting a child to eat vegetables, first she asked, ('I would really like it if you did') then pleaded, ('come on Twilight, it's for the best in the long run') then threatened ('if you don't I'll have to do it myself, and you know what that means'). She said it in a way that made me half expect her to say 'don't make me count to three'. What could I have done? I reluctantly took the pills, but made it perfectly clear I didn't want to. I told her I would never be hers. Then Fluttershy did something I never saw her do before, she scowled at me. A deep, hurtful scowl with fire in her eyes. I was quite taken aback by this, but soon I was taken over by the drug again. Day 6: The constant semi dark of the basement is breaking me. I can't tell what time of day it is. My body clock is broken. I'm not sure if I should be eating, sleeping or reading. It's the lack of sunlight. Without the rise and fall of the sun each day I can't make sense out of anything. Oh what I'd give to see the sun again. I miss the smell of the outdoors as well. In the basement it's just the same, all day, every day, every time of day. It's disorienting. I'm starting to feel dizzy from it. Is this cabin fever? I don't even know anymore. Day 7: A week has gone by. Celestia must be looking for me by now. There's no way a future princess goes missing and no one looks for her. I'm still confident the search party is out there. They will find me eventually. I will be rescued. I will. I know things take time but a week here feels like a month. I'm just desperately hoping they will come soon. My patience is wearing thin. I just need somewhere outside of these four walls. But I know they will find me, so it will be all ok. It will. Day 8: The cabin fever is slowly progressing. There's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm trying to do other things besides reading, like arranging the shelves, or trying to dust. Just anything to occupy my mind. It did little to help. I just hope something happens soon. Day 9: What is taking Celestia so long? Surely they will be searching here soon? I am having to remind myself it's only been 9 days. How long does it take to solve a case like this? Several weeks? I'm scared to think what might happen to me in those weeks. I'm loosing my grip on things. Day 10: Nothing to do. But I've already said that. Many many times before. I need something to do. The waiting would be fine, if I had something to do. I've got nothing to do, so I just sit here reading. All day. At first it was ok, then it was boring, now its frustrating. It's turning me inside out. I need a clock as well. Just something to tell me what I should be doing. It's like I'm on a roundabout, I can't tell where I am, where I'm going and what is next. Only with time. If I had a clock, something to set my body clock by, I think I would be better. Day 11: Today I got fed up with not knowing what time of day it was. There is a small, grimy cellar window, the kind that is on the floor at ground level, but above the ceiling in a recess on the wall here, barred by iron strips and well beyond my reach. It was so grimy I couldn't see anything, barely light at all. So I waited, watching to see a change in the light. I don't know how many hours I was there waiting, but I saw nothing. I just sat there, hoping to see something, a sign sign maybe, not quite sure what I was going to see. But I saw nothing. I haven't eaten all day. I've just been staring at the window. Fluttershy will come and make me eat, and then drug me again. There's no escaping it. It's the same old same old. Day after day, always the same. I can't stand it. Day 12: It's not cabin fever. Im going stir crazy. Noting to do, nothing to do, nothing to do. I found myself pacing around the room, chasing my tail, simply just for something to do. I flung myself at the shelf and threw everything around, breaking half of it, just so I had something to tidy up. The glass bottles I threw cut my skin, but at least that gave me something to think about besides nothing. I've been having mood swings, like one moment I could be reading and the next I'm smashing glass again. Then I'd go and sit by the window and aimlessly stare again. I'm going insane and I know it. I can't help it. Day 13: Fluttershy noticed the mess I had made. Overnight she emptied the room of anything that I could hurt myself with, or break, or throw, besides books. I feel powerless. I can't do anything, not even hurt myself. I am completely at the mercy of whatever Fluttershy chooses for me, and yet she chooses nothing. I wish she would do something, or at least give me something to do. There's no break from the routine. Every day it's just meals and drugs. That's it. I, physically, cannot do anything else. I'm trapped. I can't cope. I'm loosing it. I've had everything taken away from me, everything. My entire life. And it's been replaced by nothing, and endless, empty stretch of nothing. Did I die at the cart incident? Am I in hell? What do I have as my existence? Four walls, a covered window, exactly 14 stairs, a sofa, an empty shelf and books. That's it. There's no escape. No escape. Day 14: 2 weeks. 14 days. 336 hours. 20,160 minutes. 1,209,600 seconds. I know this because I worked it out. At least 50 times. No rescue. No hope. Celestia must still be out there looking for me. But there's no way she could take so long to do this, not with all the royal guard. I don't understand. She can't have abandoned me, could she? Could she? I'm still holding to the hope that she is looking for me. She would be. She cares about me. I was going to be a princess. She wouldn't leave me. She wouldn't. She wouldn't. I will hold on to that hope. It's the only thing I have left. I only she knew how much I need her right now. Day 15: Like a candle that is running out, my faith in Celestia is dwindling. My hope is draining away like my ability to think. I still hope she will come, but it's now not as sure in my mind. I'm running out of things to write here. I don't have anything to write about, because I don't have anything to do. Still. Just nothing. I'm not thinking right. I know I'm unwell. I've been sat here staring at the wall for the whole day now. The only thoughts in my mind were 'no escape' 'nothing to do' 'no hope' over and over. I must hold on hope. I will be rescued. Without that hope I am nothing. Day 16: I know I said that without hope I am nothing. But now I feel as if I've been reduced to exactly that. Celestia isn't coming. I am mostly certain of that now. This is it. I've been resigned to spend the rest of my life here, imprisoned, slowly going insane. For as long as I live. I've been crying all day. There just is no way out. I've given up all hope of ever making it out. How many futile hours have I spent at the door, pounding and working magic to no avail? The drugs saw fit to that. How many times have I tried working the iron loose around the recess in the ceiling where the window is? It's no use. I've given up. But I can't even do that. I can't just walk out on life. You know what I mean by that. There nothing I can do. I must stay here and suffer. But why? Why is this happening to me? I caught myself calling out to no one in particular, calling for help. But no one is coming, no one will help. I'm on my own. Day 17: I didn't realise just how much I appreciated my friends until I lost them. Or rather they lost me. I want them back more than anyone can imagine. I would die a thousand deaths just to have one conversation with them all again. After all I've been through in my mind, Pinkie Pie's hyperactivity, Rainbow Dash's over confidence, Rarity's prissiness and Applejack's stubbornness all seem like a welcome break. I haven't left my sofa all day. Mostly I've been asleep, dreaming away my life until it ends. I dreamt of Celestia, what life would have been like. I dreamt of escape, but whenever I awoke I realised it would never work. I dreamt of everything me and my friends ever did together, all we accomplished. I'm happier in my dreams. I never want to wake up to this hell again. Day 18: Dreams. They're only dreams. I might be happy in them, but whenever I wake up I'm reminded of what I have as my life now. Nothing. I can't sleep. I'm not tired. Yet I want to sleep. I don't want to be awake in this purgatory. I discovered an alarming fact today. Every night I'm waiting for Fluttershy to come. I'm waiting for the drugs. I need them. I want them. With them I can be away from this dungeon. With them I can escape. I'm not scared to admit it anymore. I hope they kill me. Just let it end already. Please, I don't want to be here. Someone help me, please. I can't take it anymore. Please help. Please. Just end my life here. Day 19: I'm not thinking right. Something has broken in my mind. The same thoughts seem to be playing in loop in my head. I can't help it. It taken over my mind so much I can't concentrate on doing anything else. Not that there is anything else to concentrate on Day 20: ...No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape... Day 21: Why am I keeping this journal? I hope you've seen enough, Fluttershy. I hope once you've looked through this, I know you will, you'll see how much you've hurt me. I'll never be yours. Why would you do this to your friend? Today Fluttershy came to see me. After 3 weeks. She tried to talk to me. I... I don't know what to think. Every part of me wants to hate her, but the company was, well, needed. It's difficult to explain. I hate her. I hate her a lot. But after isolation, I need her. Why is she doing this to me? I can't help it, she has messed my mind up so badly. I need those drugs, to get it all out of my head. I'm craving them. Without them I don't know if I could cope. Day 22: Fluttershy. I know you will read this. I hate you. I hate you with my entire being. My burning hate will always be there, even once I'm dead and gone this diary will carry my utter disgust. I hate you. I HATE YOU. How much I want to hurt you, you will never know. How badly this fire inside me longs to tear you apart. How much I would give to make you suffer. You could never understand. Today she came to speak to me again. Of course she would. That's what she always wanted. Because I'm 'hers'. No I'm not. And I never will be. I realise what she is doing now. She is making me dependent on her, so I will have to come to her for help. Just as I fell into insanity she comes and 'saves' me. But I'm not falling for it. I can't wait until this day is over and I can escape. Day 23: I don't think she understands. I hate her. Yet she seems so happy when I talk to her, even when I make it perfectly clear I don't want to. She must be as insane as I am. First I tried ignoring her. She kept on talking. Then I tried ending the conversation. She changed the subject. Then I asked when she would let me go, and she just laughed and said 'never, your mine, Twilight'. I'm so sick of her saying that. Nothing I said made any difference. I'm not giving up, though, I have one more plan. Tomorrow I will make it perfectly clear I'm not drawn in by her tricks. Day 24: Well I didn't expect that. But then again I'm not quite sure what I expected. She came to see me again, as has been routine these past few days. She began talking but this time I spoke out and told her I would never be hers and that no matter what she did I would never like her. It was very satisfying. After a minute long shouting fit I expected her to drug me or go away, but she didn't. She actually laughed. I had shouted, screamed and wailed at her and all she did was laugh. What can I do? I can't hurt her, she's invincible. I'm powerless. I can't even get her to stop talking at me. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not sure if I should just give in and be hers. Would that get me anywhere? I'm not sure if I care anymore. Day 25: I'm not giving in. I've decided that much. I'm not playing her games. I'm not hers. Again she came today, but now I've started fighting back, at everything she says I'm cutting in and shouting back with hurtful remarks. It feels good to see her hurt. It's the one last thing of mine she can't control, my speech. It's a triumph of mine, a victory. Even if she is determined to keep me as a pet, I'll make it so that she could never like me. It's my rebellion, my act of defiance. There wasn't much she could do. Every conversation we had ended up as an argument. She wasn't expecting it obviously. She was visible shaken by it. I'm glad of that fact. This is the way forward for me. Day 26: For the last few days a shocking fact has been haunting me. It's always been there at the back of my mind for the past week now, but recently it has been made clearer. I'm craving drugs. The sleeping pills I'm taking. Last night Fluttershy was late coming, probably due to our skirmish earlier. But I'm craving them, I need them to sleep, I don't feel right without them. It didn't feel right not having them this late. It's a startling truth, one I'm not willingly accepting as such. But at the end of the day it is. I'm not feeling angry as such, just nervous. What will this mean? I suspect these feelings will pass again and the all to familiar rage against HER will return. But even now I'm getting butterflies in my stomach. I'm addicted to drugs. What has become of me? I'm sat here in a gibbering heap of insane pony, waiting for death to come. I'm saying to myself 'Oh Celestia help me' but I know not even she can save me. I'm not sure which I prefer, complete insanity, or knowing what I have come to know. I wish Fluttershy hadn't tried talking to me now, and taken me out of my trance of insanity. I was better off running into walls than thinking. Day 27: It was too much to ask wasn't it? That my little rebellion would work? Today, she came again. As I had done yesterday and the day before I fought back. Since she had been shaken at first and then annoyed yesterday I expected something today. At least something. Nothing. Well, that's not true. She laughed it off again. She actually said 'Its so cute when you do that'. She actually said THAT. Just when I think I'm getting somewhere, just when I'm making progress, she turns around and crushes it. I can't win. There is no future where I come out on top. The best I can do is try, but I will always fail. I'm not giving in, but I'm never going to win. This worthless price of futility is all I have. Day 28: Back into a routine. Back into insanity. A routine of nothing. An endless stretch of empty nothing. Fluttershy's appearances to 'talk' have simply been added to the routine. Before long I will fall back into the depths of hell I came from. But what was I thinking? I've already been through this, many times before. There is no way out. No escape. This is my life. Here we go again. The same old things. I can almost feel myself sliding back. Twilight didn't know, she couldn't have known, but it was true. Fluttershy's actions over the past few days weren't just the beginnings of a new part of a routine, they were the beginnings of something much bigger. They were the beginning of the end. Author's Note Just one more chapter after this fellas. Wow this was originally going to be a 5k words short, but I couldn't help myself :P Big thanks to everyone who has faved this I honestly expected it to be ignored! Thanks for the motivation. Love you allx Chapter 4MLP chapter 4 For a month Twilight had waited, waited for a chance, a mistake on Fluttershy's part. Not at all times patiently, but she waited. Fluttershy wasn't perfect, and so therefore had to make a mistake somewhere, surely? Well, you would be right. One day it happened, so much without warning that it came to a shock to Twilight. Tea had been served. Today's meal was tomato soup with thick slices of buttered bread. As Fluttershy left Twilight has grown accustomed to hearing a heavy thunk as a metal bolt was drawn across the door. So when she heard nothing but silence a twinge of hope ignited in her heart. She waited, as if expecting at any moment to hear the familiar sound. The silence continued. Butterflies wriggled in her stomach. This is what she had been waiting for all this time. She felt her heart thumping faster and faster. Almost in disbelief Twilight refused to believe what she has perceived until she had felt the door for herself. She suppressed her panicked hope for fear that she had misheard. She hauled herself up and took a few tentative steps towards the stairs. In all her time here she hasn't grown immune to the effects of the miracle drug Fluttershy used to keep her imprisoned. She dragged herself up the stairs step by slow step. She was sweating, could it be true? Could she finally have a chance to escape? After what seemed like hours she summited the steps and shuffled along to the heavy door. For a few seconds she stared at the door contemplatively, wondering what she would do if it was locked. Her weeks of imprisonment had turned her pessimistic and cynical, and she expected it to be locked and her to be crazy. She almost wanted it to be so she had an excuse to feel the way she was. So when she shoved the door gently and it opened Twilight fell over in surprise. She scrambled to her feet and looked around nervously. She couldn't believe this had happened. Was she dreaming? No, this was real. She regained her balance and slowly stumbled along the corridor, praying Fluttershy didn't play her party trick of appearing out of nowhere. Fortunately she didn't. She made it to the end of the corridor. There was a windowed door ahead that seemed to lead to the back of the kitchen. She apprehensively looked around the room, expecting to see Fluttershy's grinning face staring at her from a vantage point, hypodermic needle in hoof. She even looked up to the ceiling. She wasn't falling for that one again. Placing a hoof on the handle, she pushed open the door. It let out a long, drawn out squeak, but besides that, there was dead silence. Twilight awkwardly straggled across the hard kitchen floor towards a door. Through the window in the door she could see a dazzling light. Daylight. Finally she had seen the sight she believed she would never see again. The gorgeous red sun radiated down onto lush green meadows, and animals milled around munching on dewy grass. It was a perfect sunset. Twilight rushed towards it. All that lay between her and escape was an inch thick slab of wood and glass. The square of heaven seemed to fly towards her as she advanced. Opening the door she took a breath of fresh air, her first in a month. The scent of pollen and grass filled her lungs. She bursted out into the open air. The intense light was almost too much for Twilight after her weeks of darkness. She squinted heavily and looked around. There was sweet smelling trees around her, with rolling hills of thick, soft grass stretching into the distance. The smell of outside overwhelmed her. It was intoxicating. Putting a foreleg over her head to shield her eyes from the slanting evening sun she located a single track that led over a small, sparkling stream and into the town, just half a mile away. She was free at last! At long long last she had escaped! Twilight began to walk towards the town. Slowly and unsteadily she dragged herself along the road. Weeks of dependence on drugs made her unsteady. Night quickly fell. What would have taken a normal pony about ten minutes took Twilight in her weakened state over an hour. Her joy at escaping quickly subsided into a physical struggle to keep walking. It was like trying to climb a mountain or run a marathon. She almost felt like she couldn't carry on. Every step was a struggle. A pang of worry struck her. Could she make it into Ponyville if she tried? She dismissed the thought. She would rather die trying than go back. The time quickly came that Fluttershy would come to her with the drugs for sleeping. Twilight was shaking from the physical exertion but she knew she had to carry on. To admit defeat now would be impossible. She was feeling very ill now, she presumed from the sheer exertion of struggling against the drug. Or was it physical exertion? Something definitely wasn't right with her. Something else, besides exhaustion. She stopped walking, stood still and took stock of her situation. Something definitely wasn't right. Being a faithful student and having read books on self diagnosis before, she ran through a few simple checks. Twilight felt nausea, muscle aches and cold sweats. Her stomach dropped. She recognised those symptoms. She knew where but desperately didn't want to admit it to herself. She didn't want to face it. She was dependent on the drugs. Her rear leg twitched. She wanted to go back and get some more. She knew she couldn't, but she wanted to. She carried on walking, hoping the exercise would shake the symptoms away, but instead they progressed. The cravings grew more and more intense. It was like Fluttershy had attached a leash to her hind leg that was reeling her in. It was a mental struggle to press on. She had doubts as to whether she could make it back. She knew she had to try. Half of her wanted to say she would rather die trying, but as the pain intensified she knew that wasn't the case. She looked up to see how much ground she had covered. Barely half way. A long long way still to go. She carried on. She knew it was only a matter of time before her body packed in, but she hoped that time would come after she arrived in town. Minutes passes like hours. Every step intensified the worry and sickness. But she carried on. The evening soon settled into dusk. At her achingly slow rate the scenery was immediately more apparent to Twilight. Fluttershy had chosen, of all the places, to live right next to the Everfree forest. Looking at it again, she still shivered at the sight of the crooked branches and deep, pitch black shadows, concealing unspeakable evils. In her weak condition, she would have no way of hiding should a Manticore or Timber Woolf appear. Or Fluttershy. The temperature quickly dropped under the clear indigo sky. It would have been a beautiful sight if Twilight had the peace of mind to enjoy it. Silvery blue swathes of countryside rolled into the distance, and trees became outlined in shining white. Twilight's shivering and twitching progressed, half due to the temperature, half otherwise. Her stomach cramped. She clutched it with a forehoof and lowered her head in pain, her face twisted. Grimacing, she took another step forward. The pain refused to go away. Focusing on the scenery hadn't done anything to solve her problem. It was becoming harder and harder to walk. She looked back at the house that had been her prison for so long. It seemed so far away, yet so did the lights from the town. If she couldn't make it to the town, she had no choice, she would have to go back. But looking at it now, she seemed to be exactly half way. If she couldn't make it to town, she couldn't make it back either. She has gone too far to turn back. She was on her own now, until she reached safety. She slugged on, falling into a routine of throwing herself at the next step, then the next, then the next. Every step was a battle in her mind and body. This continued for what seemed like hours, until finally her step faltered. She slumped against a tree that chaffed against her matted fur. Looking between the house and back, she felt as if she was out at sea, swimming against the tide from one shore to another. If she stayed out, she would die. But exhaustion, or whatever it was, prevented further movement. She was sweating, despite being freezing. She was shivering, although not getting any warmer. Het head pulsed and she saw stars. Her stomach cramped again, her mind a turmoil of pain. She was drowning, the shore just too far out of reach. Drawing on inner reserves of strength the stood up and desperately tried again to move. She scarcely made it to the next tree before collapsing. She could hear nothing but her own heavy breathing. Was this it? Was this all she had? It couldn't be. She tried lifting her legs to drag herself to her hooves, but nothing came of it. Instead she could only watch the world as time passed. But not much time passed before something happened. Within a matter of seconds an all too familiar face calmly floated down from the heavens to come against Twilight's. Twilight knew this was the end. "I allowed that, to show you how useless trying to rebel is. Come on Twilight, wouldn't it just be easier to accept it? You're mine." A small pinprick in her hind, and soon her mind was laid to rest. The next day brought with it a cold, bleak light. Red adorned the outline of the thin, jagged clouds that clung to the horizon, as if they were blades threatening the ground to retaliate. A stiff breeze ran it's fingers through the branches of the forest, rattling as it went. The weather was changing for the worse. As Twilight regained consciousness the truth stabbed her through in a wave of hopelessness. Her only chance of escape had passed her by, now the only thing that lay ahead was the eternal purgatory of imprisonment. There would be no more mistakes. That was it. She had her chance, but failed. She had been here before, feeling these feelings and thinking these thoughts, but never like this. Something had snapped that last night. The all to usual self pity and grief were gone. In replacement was pure, unadulterated hate. Her lengthy time of insanity had removed any semblance of Twilight Sparkle and put in place an effigy of hate. Instead of hope, there was depression. Instead of fear, there was recklessness. Instead of optimism, there was cynicism. Twilight was no longer Twilight. Her mind was sucked dry, void of all emotion other than twisted depression. She had become a snake, poised and ready for ambush, waiting for another chance to get back at her captor. And as soon as she could, she would. But that wasn't the only thing to have changed in recent days. Fluttershy too, was sliding further and further into the mind trap she had set herself. Of course, she had Twilight as hers, no one could refute that, yet still something was lacking. Twilight didn't want to be hers. That could be expected. But even now, when it would be so much easier to give up and accept it, she still fought. Even after all this time she still actively refused. Why couldn't she just accept her fate? She doesn't need to fight back, she has everything provided for her. Fluttershy just didn't understand how this situation could still feel so empty. That is why she let Twilight out, so she could see for her self how fighting is not worth it. There's no point being awkward, when you could just go with it and be fine. She hoped Twilight would see that now, and things would be different. That Twilight would see things from her perspective, and how she didn't need to feel anger towards her. She had done all she could. After all, that was the reason why she had done so, so she could have Twilight and not loose her. She just wanted to always be there for her, to care and look after her, forever. And she was doing so, but still it just didn't feel right. Though with the new development, this might change. Fluttershy carried the cooked breakfast along the corridor to the stairs. The door was unlocked. She floated graciously down the stairs and smiled at Twilight. Twilight wasn't looking, she was staring at a patch of wall in front of Fluttershy, but she felt the air of hostility around her friend. Her smile wavered, but remained. She cleared her throat. "Twilight, breakfast is ready" she spoke Twilight turned and glared straight at Fluttershy with frenzied intensity. Fluttershy was quite taken aback at the aggressiveness of her stance. "What use does it make? If I refuse to eat you will only force feed me. You won't let me just curl up and die, will you?" came the curt reply. Fluttershy laughed gently. "And why would I do something like that?" "Because it's what I want to do" Twilight said firmly. There was a moments grim silence. "You don't need to fight, Twilight. All I wanted was to be here for you, and I have been. I'm looking after you. I'm not your enemy, I'm your friend. There's no need to be like that, so why carry on?" "You're not my friend" she said shortly. She stuffed her mouth full of food and refused to talk. Fluttershy gave up. She gently lifted off the ground and floated up the stairs, not locking the door as she went. Many conversations had gone like this before, but none held the same significance as this one had. Things were changing, and Fluttershy was changing too. She had already given it time, and things hadn't improved. She was at a loss as to what had gone wrong. Why would Twilight say something like that? She was her friend, wasn't she? They were all friends. But things were so different now. Twilight was different. Her intentions were innocent, she hadn't meant any harm to anyone, let alone Twilight. She just didn't want to loose a friend. She couldn't live with the loss of a friend. That's the reason for her shyness, because she is permanently scared of loosing what she has. So she made sure she would never loose her friend. But things didn't exactly go to plan. She shook herself. The morning was still young, but Fluttershy has things to do. She didn't need to lock the door anymore, Twilight couldn't escape, she was fairly certain of that. Besides, she needed something to clear her head. Underneath her Twilight silently waited for a thud that meant the upstairs outside door has closed. Fluttershy had left. Picking herself up off the floor, she made her slow way over to the stairs. She knew what she had to do. Ascending the stairs she contemplated the prospect before her. Strangely there was no emotion. No fear, no dread, no apprehension. She reached the corridor. There wasn't even relief, no hope, just in case her plan died before she did. Reaching the kitchen she looked around. Fluttershy was nowhere. To her left was the wall, painted a simple off white. Ahead was the door that lead to the outside, it's window casting a rectangle of harsh light onto the stone tiled floor. To her right was the kitchen proper. On one side there were old cupboards below and above the working surface and a sink. On the far wall was a cooker. On the side nearer her was a desk like working surface with cupboards above and stools below. There were several drawers by the sink, but Twilight quickly found what she was looking for on the desk. The knife rack held several long, sharp blades. Not the type that would look inappropriate in a kitchen, but long and sharp all the same. Clutching at one with two hooves, she picked out of the wooden rack a thin but pointy one, about three inches long. It didn't need to be long to cut her throat. She raised it to her throat to take aim, lowered it to her chest, took a deep breath in, and collapsed to the ground. The clean knife clattered to the ground right next to her chest, as Fluttershy reclaimed the needle that pierced her flesh at the base of her spine. She wouldn't even let her just curl up and die. Fluttershy looked on with mixed emotions burning her heart like cyanide. She stared as Twilight's eyes filled with rage and then gently closed, her mouth preparing to scream obscenities at her before loosing and hanging open as she crumpled up on the cold stone floor. First there was quiet anger that she would try to do that. That was quickly dispelled as it was always. Then came sadness, that Twilight honestly felt like committing the act. Then came utter depression in knowing that her actions had done such a thing. Fluttershy stood and stared at the corpse-like body that lay before her. Her mind raced, a mixer of volatile emotions. She was having yet another revelation. She felt this way the night Twilight declared she was becoming an Alicorn. Then she realised she never wanted to let Twilight out of her sight, never wanted to loose her. Now, things are different. True, Twilight would never be out of her sight again. But that creature in her basement was not Twilight. It could never be Twilight again. She bad broken her. In the act of preserving her friendship, she had lost it. Twilight was conscious, she just hadn't opened her eyes yet. That put the metaphorical axe through that idea. Now life became a game of waiting. Waiting for food, waiting for a chance to hurt her captor, and maybe, just maybe, just waiting for a chance to escape, alive or not. All the empty hours spent now meant nothing. They passed by without Twilight even noticing. She knew now that her life was nothing, she had no choice. The only thing left was to take Fluttershy down with her. Slowly the red sun rose into the grey sky. Through a thin layer of hazy cloud, vague shadows shrunk with the passing of time. The grey haze thickened and thinned as spring rain showers rolled across the miserable sky. The sun seemed forgotten, trekking a solitary path from horizon to horizon, at midday having no more strength than it did at sunrise. Wildlife seemed to have forgotten to wake up, and the waterlogged fields were void of animals. Besides the pitter patter of rain, the landscape was oddly silent. At noon the sky was darkened as a heavy shower was pushed across the sky by a team of Pegasi. Down below on the ground Fluttershy was thinking. Not intentionally, but as she worked, her mind was chipping away at the problem that seemed so insolvable. What went wrong? A large vulture was perched on the window sill, staring intently away from the portal to freedom by his side. He had once been a handsome bird, soaring majestically on currents, without moving a muscle. Then he broke his wing and was grounded for several weeks. Fluttershy found him entangled in a tree, half dead and helpless. Now, after all this time, he refused to take to the skies once more. It was a sad sight, really. The once proud flier grounded, too afraid to return to his former glory. Fluttershy had been pleading with the animal to at least try, but it was no use. It wasn't that he was a nervous creature before the accident, he was always bold and full of bravado and pride, but the crash seemed to have taken away that confidence. He had changed. He just wasn't the same. "Honestly, you've not been the same since, it's as if you are a different person..." There was a long, drawn out silence as an epiphany hit her like a blackjack. It was a revelation. Of course, that's what went wrong. It was obvious now she looked at it this way. She had taken Twilight, but after everything that happened, she had changed. Twilight wasn't Twilight anymore. Just like the vulture had lost it's former self, Fluttershy had lost the former Twilight she knew and loved. It made sense to her now. How could she have ben so stupid before? For a short while that new idea pleased her, after all, it was the solution to her problem. But that made her stop and think more, and after a bit, her half smile was wiped from her face as the full impacts became clear to her. Just the same as the vulture, Twilight wasn't coming back. Not now, not ever. It was suddenly quite clear to her, what she had done, what that entailed. She had done everything to make sure, to be certain, that she would never loose a friend. A friend that she thought she could never live without. But now that friend was gone. In the very action she took to save her friend, she had lost her. And it would never, ever, be the same again. Fluttershy thought back to all she had subjected her friend to. All the pain, all the misery, all the heartbreak. Her friend didn't deserve that. No, she had been cruel, hurtful and had damaged her friend. She knew that now. Emotions coursed through her in a surge that engulfed her. Sadness, pain, depression, anger. She just wanted to take it all back, say sorry and have it over and done with. Just to forget everything about the last month. But she knew she could never do that. It had gone too far, too long. Twilight was broken beyond repair, and it was all her fault. She couldn't do anything about that. This time, there was no getting away from it. She would be banished, her friends would never see her again, and she would be an outcast. She could never live with that. She could never live knowing she had done what she had done. But she would have to. Sooner or later, she would have to face up to her punishment, whatever that meant. And it all starts now. She stared at the vulture, and at the desk like working surface on which it's shadow was cast. She knew what she had to do. Twilight hadn't moved. She didn't feel the need to. She heard a familiar creak as the door was pushed open. She didn't react. Now was her chance. She would ignore her, completely blank her. It would be as if she didn't exist. That is the only thing in her life she had left to control, was when she spoke. And she would control it. Still staring at the wall, she didn't see Fluttershy standing there in the doorway. Instead of trying to illicit a response, Fluttershy glided over to in front of Twilight's face. Still she didn't see her, she seemed to look straight through her. "I'm sorry" Fluttershy said, simply "What? Sorry? No, you don't get it do you? Sorry is when you step on someponies hoof, or spill a drink on someponies carpet, this is not sorry. Sorry just doesn't cut it here, and never could" "I know. I know you could never forgive me, and I couldn't either. That's why I'm doing this" she said as she raised the knife from where it was tucked into her wing. Twilight flinched and scrambled backwards, ready to give one final struggle before Fluttershy put her out of her misery for good. It was what she wanted, but she wasn't going to go without hurting Fluttershy as much as she could. She was closer now, advancing with long wingbeats. Raising the knife above her head in her right hoof, she prepared to strike. Twilight ducked back further but it was no use, Fluttershy would always be in reach as long as she could fly. Bracing herself, Fluttershy closed her eyes, took a deep breath and brought the knife down. It found it's target, sinking into the soft flesh. With a single swift movement, there was a soft patter as a spurt of crimson liquid sprayed onto the wall, and a muffled clump as the body of a pony fell to the floor. Then, there was silence. Twilight looked at the corpse of her friend. A small trickle of blood from her severed neck formed a trail down into the grout of the floor. She felt the passing of something, as if a huge weight was lifted off her. It took a few seconds for everything to sink in. Fluttershy was dead. Her captor, gone. She was free. As if all of a sudden, the old Twilight groggily awoke from her grave inside her mind. It was over. The torment was no more. That was it, it was done. She was free at long, long last. No more empty nothing, no more insanity. No more passing time, waiting to die, no more drugs. Twilight smiled. Life would soon return to normal for her. She could leave, nothing was stopping her, she didn't have to spend a minute longer in this place. She turned to the stairs and made her wobbly, unsteady way to the base, grinning wildly. She turned and saw the motionless body at the centre of the room. She felt sad that it had to end like that. She wished her friend would have just let her go. She was sure after a while Fluttershy could have returned to normal. No one had to die. It was obvious she was insane, but her base intentions weren't bad. Twilight still couldn't see her point of view, but she was sure she hadn't meant to hurt her. One thing above all made Twilight think: maybe if she hadn't been so horrible to her, she wouldn't have felt so bad. After all, in her insanity she had been quite mean. But could she have avoided that when the mental bonds of her treatment messed her so? It was confusing, and painful to think about. That her friend had slid down into that low state of mind made for a twinge of pain in her liberation. Twilight would miss her shy friend. Taking a few bottles of drugs Fluttershy has displayed in the kitchen, she opened the door. A cold red sun met her. The skies had long since cleared themselves of the grey film that wreathed the horizon, and now an indigo bowl was left to greet the unicorn as she walked out to meet a cool, fresh air that welcomed her back to life. Author's Note Well that's all folks. Thanks for reading this pile of crap, I know it's not brilliant but it's only my second story, and my new one is going to be better by a country mile, so please check it out. I'm not sure if I can keep the teen rating with this, I mean suicide and blood spurts are kinda bad. Or maybe I should put a gore tag on, I don't know. Let me know in the comments, also constructive criticism is very welcome. Once again thanks!
Chapter 1My Little Princess "Who want some more punch?" Pinkie asked everyone, bouncing as she did, as they tucked into a delicious slice of cake. For a while there was just the sound of munching and a happy "mmm" of approval. It had been a great party. It was all Pinkie could do after Twilight said she had something really important to tell everyone. They had gathered in Applejack's barn and decorated it in true Pinkie style. After some music, dancing and party games they had all enjoyed a meal and now were eating cake. "Ah might have some, if there's some goin'" Applejack said in reply to the question. Pinkie waded through some streamers and poured a generous helping of purple punch in the empty glass. "Anyone else?" she asked, glad to be of service. "No? ok then" she said as she sat back down. She looked at Applejack and gave her a wild look that said 'go on, now!' "Ah believe Twilight had something to tell us all, something really important. Go on Twi, tell us." she said after finishing a mouthful of confectionary. Twilight was still finishing one last mouthful when Pinkie exploded. "Ooh ooh wait, let's guess! Errm hang on, ooh yes that's it, you got an A in your last test? No wait, that's not it, you are getting your mane permed? No, you're building an extension to the library? Did I get it, was that it? Or..." "Pinkie. No, that's not it. I do have something really important though. Something that could change everything." Twilight said, not quite sure how to word what she had to say. Everyone in the room looked on with tense expectation. "Go on..." they all said at once. "I am becoming a princess. An Alicorn Princess. Celestia told me in person, at the gala, but I haven't had the... The guts to tell you all. We will still be friends..." she said, nervous of their responses. There was a ghastly moment of silence. Accompanying it was the sudden feel of shock from the group. It lasted just a millisecond, just long enough for Pinkie to pull the trigger on her party cannon. A loud cheer erupted from the group, and the moment passed without anyone noticing. Broad smiles of warm adulation adorned the faces of the 5 happy friends. They happily chatted about how it came to be, that Twilight, their friend, had been made a princess. "I'll show you the letter, it's with Spike where is he anyway? I'd better go get him, he's probably up to no good" Twilight said as she walked to the door "I'll be right back!" and she was gone. The 5 ponies looked around the room at each other. No one was smiling. The awkward feeling returned. "This really couldn't get much worse could it" Rarity stated frankly. "She's going to leave us behind" she said, with a tone of voice that showed nothing less than absolute seriousness. "I don't get it. I put all my effort, literally all, into joining the Wonderbolts, and she just gets the whole thing handed to her on a silver platter. That's just not fair" Rainbow Dash said with more than a hint of sadness in her voice. "An am here bustin mah gut out in the field, an what ah get for it? Jus enough to get by. Thats all. Why does she get everythin?" Applejack spouted in righteous anger. "But she'll be gone, and even if he stays she'll be too busy to come to any parties and that would just be bad, and with all her responsibilities no one will see her as much and then we won't be bestest bestest friends anymore" babbled Pinkie with no coherence and tears forming at the corner of her eyes. Only one pony wasn't mortified by the news. That's because Fluttershy had a plan. It was such a simple plan, yet it would work. It was perfect. It was genius. She knew how to make everything better, like how it always had been. How to get rid of all this Alicorn nonsense. But instead of saying it out loud she simply spoke in her usual quiet tone. "I mean I understand why she is a princess, I just don't understand... Why" the other ponies all agreed. "The one thing we can't do is tell Twi. Honestly ah tell you it's for the best" Applejack explained. A murmur of agreement arose from the others. Twilight chose that moment to burst into the room levitating a scroll just ahead of her. She looked around the room at her friends happy, beaming faces. "I found it!" she said. Time passed. Not one of the 5 stepped out of character, or gave any impression of their worried anger over Twilight's new role in Equestria. Soon the party was over, and one by one the ponies left the barn and went home. Applejack watched as 5 ponies became silhouettes in the dark and vanished. What she didn't notice is that Fluttershy wasn't going home. If she had maybe what horrors and nightmares that were to be might not have happened. Something cracked at the party, something that should have stayed put. This is what happens when a mind cracks. Twilight walked home full of cake and delicious punch. She was on top of the world. She had just been to a great party, been with great friends and despite the shocking news no one had overreacted, not even Pinkie Pie. She thought her life through. She had great friends, great neighbours, she was becoming a princess, a princess! And she would be that little bit closer to Celestia. Things couldn't be better. She strolled home with a heart full of joy. The smell of the evening and the beautiful moonlit countryside made an intoxicating aura. In the distance she heard the clip clop of a pony and the rattle and shake of a heavy cart. She though it was slightly odd that a pony would be dragging such a heavy load as that at this time of night. Still, as happy as she was, she didn't think much to it. She rounded a blind corner and everything happened at once. Twilight didn't see what happened, she simply felt a colossal whump as a black cloud of nothing enveloped her mind. If there had been somepony around to see it, as indeed there was, they would have seen the stallion pulling the heavy cart cross a T junction at the exact moment Twilight chose to. The stallion had already passed but the corner of the massive cart struck her square in the head as she aimlessly meandered long the road. The stallion, pulling the heavy load that he was, didn't notice as he effectively ran over a future princess. One pony did notice though, and her name was Fluttershy. Waiting like a predator, she flew down from her vantage point in the trees and stooped next to the body, caressing the bleeding, half conscious head and half whispering sweet nothings into Twilight's ear as she dragged the heavy body to her home "There there, it's ok, I've got you, it will all be ok..." Twilight woke up in a dark, barely lit room. There was a terrible pounding in her head. It throbbed and pulsed. She recalled what had happened, the cart, the... Voices? Who was it? She didn't know. She opened her eyes to try and make better sense of her situation. She appeared to be in a dusty basement. Whoever it was rarely came down here. She was lying on a dusty yet comfortable sofa. Here and there was a few things scattered about that seemed out of place. Crutches of all shapes and sizes, small wheelchairs for mice, and rows upon rows of medicine bottles. Medical equipment. She desperately tried to remember how she got here. She remembered seeing through half open eyes the familiar outline of a pony. Fluttershy. She was in Fluttershy's basement. Now it made sense. But why would Fluttershy take her here? Why didn't she take her to the hospital? She supposed she had better find Fluttershy and find out. She tried to get up. Twilight realised with shock that she could barely move. It was like her body weighed a tonne. Every move she made took enormous effort. It felt like someone had strapped cement bags to the ends of her limbs. After struggling for some time she rolled off the sofa and came crashing onto the grimy floor. The impact shook her as her limp body fell awkwardly. She lied there for several seconds contemplating whether she actually could find Fluttershy if she tried. She tried standing up but was too weak. Slowly, she crawled along the dirty floor, inch by inch and with tremendous effort. She reached a set of stairs that seemed to be the only way out of the room and listened. There was dead silence. She crawled up the stairs one huge step at a time. The bare wood scratched her as she made her way up the clifflike slope. After much struggling she made it to the door. She reached up and turned the handle. Locked. She tried unlocking the door with magic, but like her body, her horn was unresponsive. Only a dim glow came, not even enough to lift a pencil, let alone unlock a door. She tried her hardest, but nothing happened. After all this effort it remained locked. She had fallen at the last hurdle, defeated by a door. Now what? All she could do was wait for Fluttershy to come. She could be here for hours. Then without warning a quiet but clear voice rang out from the darkness "Hehe, I was wondering how far you would get." came the disembodied voice. Twilight jumped. It seemed to come from directly above her. She looked up to see Fluttershy hovering silently above her. At the staircase the ceiling rose and there waited the canary coloured Pegasus. Watching like a vulture, she silently waited for Twilight to give in to her futile struggle, grinning the whole time. Twilight watched now as she floated noiselessly towards her like an angel. As she got closer she saw an unnatural demonic light behind her bright, dewey eyes. It was clear from the very aura the came from her that something was wrong. It made Twilight's fur stand on end. She was holding a spoonful of deep yellow liquid and gently stroked Twilight's body as she offered the medicine. "You're very ill, Twilight. You need to rest" she softly spoke, watching as the consciousness drained from her friend. Twilight couldn't do anything as she was dragged under by the effect of the drug. She thought it odd that Fluttershy would knock her out like so, but before any other thoughts could be processed, she was gone. Twilight came to on the same sofa in the same room. Immediately her mind was awake, yet her body still wouldn't respond. As she stirred, a shape moved in the shadows. Fluttershy lifted her head, and noticing Twilight was awake, she got up and quietly strode over to the purple unicorn. She sat down on the floor next to the sofa so her and Twilight were eye to eye. Twilight was the first to speak. "What happened?" "You had an accident. A cart hit you, you knocked your head so I took you home. I'm taking care of you. I'm going to look after you." Fluttershy still spoke gently, yet differently. It was the hollow, chilling tone that crept in her voice. It had a haunting quality to it. The demonic look came into he eyes as she said the final two sentences. Twilight noticed these things but refused to believe that it meant anything. It couldn't mean anything, could it? "When will I be better?" she asked. There was a ghostly silence again. She asked again "When can I leave?" she said, more insistently this time. Fluttershy didn't respond for a while. "I said I'm going to take care of you." she said as if it answered her question. "I don't understand, when will I be well enough to leave?" Twilight replied, the first signs of panic rising in her mind. "I'm looking after you now, Twilight, I'm taking care of you... Your mine." she said, the last words barely a whisper, yet crystal clear in the dead silence. "I know you're looking after me, but when can I get back to the princess? I have a lot to do, and the coronation is coming up soon. I need to get back as soon as I can." she said, doubts forming in her mind as to Fluttershy's intentions. Half of her saw something else in the young Pegasus, something dark, yet the other half couldn't believe that Fluttershy would be doing such a thing. "Your mine... You can't leave. I'm taking care of you, looking after you" came the ice cold whisper of a reply. Twilight panicked. "No. Fluttershy, why? I need to leave. Princess Celestia needs me, I'm a princess. Spike needs me, you don't want to hurt spike, do you? The princess will find you. You'll be found out. Please, just let me go." she spurted in nervous panic. Fluttershy seemed to stare beyond Twilight's face, beyond the wall and into the open universe behind her. "It came to me at the party". Her eyes focused sharply on Twilight as she paused. "You were moving on, Twilight. You were becoming a princess. I realised then that you would be Celestia's. Not mine. You were always mine, Twilight. I always cared for you, even when you didn't notice. Even when you couldn't possibly have seen I was looking after you. I didn't want you to be Celestia's, I wanted you to be mine. So now you are. All mine. I'm looking after you now, not the princess. I'm taking care of you." the words came as if saying what she had to say was difficult, as if she was expressing some deep inner triumph. Her eyes drifted to the unseen universe and Twilight struggled against the drug that bound her so tightly to the sofa. Fluttershy was so intensely staring into the void that she didn't seem to notice when Twilight rolled off the sofa and crawled along the floor. Not that she needed to. Not that she could have escaped if she tried. Twilight saw the door and knew from Fluttershy's lack of interest that is was locked. She sobbed on the floor, finally admitting defeat. Fluttershy returned to the present and silently slid over to Twilight's heaving body as sobs wracked her body. Twilight felt a sharp jab as a hypodermic syringe was injected into her flank, and saw black envelop her vision as she was taken under once again. When Twilight awoke Fluttershy was gone. Her body still wouldn't work. What now? What would she do to her? How long would she be trapped here? What did Fluttershy want from her? All these questions and no answer. Author's Note I don't own MLP. And you can be bloody thankful of that fact.
Chapter 2MLP chapter 2 Hours passed. Nothing happened. Nothing other than the continually recycling chain of questions that wore on her mind. Everything had happened so fast, Twilight had a hard time realising just what had become of these last few hours. Being alone for so long after what had happened with nothing but thoughts to keep company slowly drained Twilight's sanity. Slowly, but surely, her imagination ran away with her mind. In the silence she began to hear something. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. The distant hammering rang out in Twilight's head. It sounded like machinery of some sort. What would Fluttershy be doing with machinery? She listened again. ThudThudThudThudThud It was still there, now faster. Twilight lay wondering for a few seconds before curiosity got the better of her, but to her confusion, as she lifted her head up, the noise vanished. That confused her. Was Fluttershy watching her? She lay back down and scanned the room. ThudThudThudThudThud The noise returned, even faster. Then she realised. If Twilight could have moved easier she would have kicked herself. It was her heartbeat. She felt rather foolish upon reflection. She tried to relax again, but despite the worry being over, her heart refused to slow down. Out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw a shadow move. She jerked her head to look but saw nothing. She turned back, suddenly feeling a dread come over her. On the shelf just at the edge of her sight, something was staring at her. Again she jerked her head but saw it was only a bottle. Fluttershy had given her the creeps. Seeing such a lovely pony such as Fluttershy in that state was a shock to say the least. It was the eyes, she was sure. The way she seemed to stare straight through her. Being alone for so long in the absolute silence scared her too. Fear began to take over Twilight's mind. Something moved again. Twilight tried desperately to resist the urge to look. In her mind she knew it was nothing, but the more she tried not to give in to the desire, the more it pulled. It moved again. She looked. She was right. It was nothing. Something else moved. Twilight felt her skin crawl as if an army of ants was running across her. She closed her eyes tight and put a foreleg over her face in a vain attempt to shut out the imaginary sensory assault. In her mind she saw the shadows creeping around her. She opened her eyes in time to see something flicker behind her. She turned to see nothing. What did she expect? What DID she expect? Goosebumps ran up and down her skin under her fur. Was that a cold breath of air? Why was their a breeze inside? Twilight couldn't take it anymore. She rose off the sofa, raging against the drug that kept her still this long, and let out a weak scream. "Heeeeeeelp" Her cry barely echoed around the empty room. Did she hear someone calling out to her? No, it was just her echo. Or was it? No, it WAS. "Aaaaaargh" She half ran, half fell towards the wall, the effects of the drug causing her to sway and stagger like a drunk. She pounded the wall using all of her sapped strength. All it did was make a few soft patting sounds and she slumped to the floor. Weakly she spoke out loud "Just let me out" She sobbed on the floor for a minute, but all that did was give her a numb leg from the cold hard floor. She dragged herself back to the dreaded sofa and lay face down, curled up in the tightest shape she could make, and prepared a mental barrier against the horrors of the room. She listened to the silence that was the only thing she could be sure of. She lay there for several minutes with a blank mind. Twilight thought she felt a presence near her. She blocked the thought before it could run away with her mind. The presence was still there in Twilight's mind but she ignored it, willing it to go away. "Twilight?" spoke Fluttershy, her quiet voice sounding loud in the cold silence of the room. Twilight jumped with an almighty jolt that, if it wasn't for the drugs, would have skyrocketed her to the ceiling. How could she have snook up to her like that? There was absolute silence in the room, she would have heard a drop of water fall, yet she hadn't heard a thing. Like a ghost, she was just there. Twilight half expected her to just fade away into nothing like an apparition. She was hovering silently just a few inches from the floor. Completely silently. She was holding, balanced delicately on one hoof, a tray with a plate full of food and a glass of deep yellow punch. "I got you some food, Twilight. Don't be scared." she reassured her. For a few achingly long seconds Twilight just stared blankly. "How did you get here?" she finally asked, realising after she said it how stupid the question sounded. "Why, the door..." she replied, voice trailing off at the end. An idea struck Twilight. An idea that could end all the misery all together. Twilight considered running. The drug couldn't keep her from trying. Even if she had locked the door she could get the key off Fluttershy. What could she do anyway? She could easily overpower the slight pegasus. Fluttershy was weak and helpless after all. Several awkward seconds passed, tension building in the atmosphere between the two ponies. It wasn't until Twilight looked into the eyes of her opponent that she realised she could never bring herself to do it. She knew she could escape that way, but Fluttershy was her friend. Even at this dire time she just couldn't. Years of loyalty made her stop and think about attacking her, even when she had been attacked herself. And yet this could be her chance to escape. Her life could be in danger of she didn't act now. Her mind was a battlefield of conflicting thoughts and feelings. Fluttershy seemed to stare straight into her eyes with an innocent, slightly troubled look. She seemed perfectly content to just sit there and watch the thoughts spin around Twilight's dizzy head. Twilight tried magic again, in desperate search for a way out not including violence. Nothing happened. She had to run. Still, as he turned to Fluttershy and looked deep into her eyes she couldn't bring herself to hurt Fluttershy. Yet she could still try running. She looked away and geared her mind up to bolt towards the door. Fluttershy placed the tray on the floor and turned to leave. She felt her heart beating out of her mouth. She might just have one shot at this. She waited a few precious seconds to put distance between her and Fluttershy. There was now at least ten paces between them. While she was looking away Twilight shot up out of her chair and ran with a surprising turn of speed. No sooner had she taken two steps when Fluttershy, swift as lightening, jabbed a syringe deep into her neck, threatening to kill her outright. Twilight choked at the sudden impact to her neck. Fluttershy had closed the gap between them just a few milliseconds too quickly. How did she move that fast? It was almost supernatural. She felt her body fall in a heap on the floor. "Please don't try to run. I kind of knew you would, but I'm trying my best to look after you. Don't make this any harder than it needs to be, I don't want to hurt you" came the soft voice, the words seeming to be spoken directly into her head as she lost consciousness. 'This is starting to become a theme now, isn't it?' she thought as she blacked out. When she awoke her food was cold. She still ate it hungrily, she hadn't eaten since the party that suddenly seemed so distant in the past. She chugged down the punch, but saved some just in case she felt thirsty later. As she finished the meal the reality of her situation dawned on her once again. She was stuck here, with nothing to do, imprisoned by what she could only describe as a maniac, waiting for something to happen and completely at the mercy of some complex drug. How could this have happened? Well, she knew how, but not why. Twilight suddenly felt alone. She felt alone in a way that she had never felt before. One moment she had everything going for her, and the next, she had everything taken away from her. She wanted to cry again. How long was this going to last for? Surely someone would notice. Maybe Fluttershy would give it away. She hoped and prayed that someone would find her soon. It had been just a few hours and yet it had already taken it's toll on her mind. What would Fluttershy do to her? What did she want? She shuddered at the thought of possible answers to those questions. What did the future hold? She thought about her failed attempt at escape. Escape was impossible. Not with Fluttershy the way she was. There was no other door, and the one grimy window was behind thick metal bars. She probably didn't have the strength to break it anyway. She was trapped, in the greatest sense one could ever be trapped, but she knew worrying wouldn't do anything. She felt completely hopeless, and yet, she knew that with that attitude, she was. Despite everything, Twilight knew she must stay strong. Worrying would only get her to the sorry state she had been in before the meal came. She would not let Fluttershy's madness make her give in. She would refuse to let her win. She would stay strong, for Celestia. No more of that shadows moving nonsense. She just had to stay calm and not panic, then she would be ok. Just not loose her mind, and then she would be fine until someone came to rescue her. She had to find something to do, something to occupy her mind. She looked around the room and saw the shelves. There was a few dusty books, old veterinary textbooks. Well, what else was there to do? Twilight lost herself in the book. As she read, she became so engrossed in the material, she forgot her predicament. She managed to relax a little. All she had to do was keep her head while she waited for Celestia to come and rescue her. She had every confidence that Celestia would come, or at least someone, so much so she didn't feel the need to question it. To her it wasn't a question of 'how will I leave' as much as 'when will I leave'. And of course the question of will she keep her sanity until she does leave? Later that day Fluttershy came into the room again. She held in her hoof two small pills, and a glass of clear water. This time Twilight heard her coming. "Hey Twilight. It's late now. You should probably get some sleep. Here, I got you something to help you" she said, offering the pills. Twilight looked from Fluttershy to the tablets, then back again. "Fluttershy, why are you doing this? Why can't you just let me go?" asked Twilight. "Because I want you to be mine. If I let you out then you wouldn't be. I didn't realise how much I wanted you until I nearly lost you. I'm not going to let that happen again." explained the canary yellow Pegasus. "But we were still going to be friends..." "But you weren't going to be MINE. You were going to be Celestia's. I wanted you, all of you. Not just what was left." Fluttershy interrupted, with a loud, harsh tone in her voice that Twilight had only heard her use against a dragon that one time. Twilight looked on, shocked. Fluttershy noticed and she continued in a softer voice. "I don't want to hurt you. These are to help you get to sleep." she said, motioning to the pills. "I hope they help" she added as she got up and left Twilight couldn't make any sense out of Fluttershy's actions. She didn't seem to want to hurt her, and yet wanted to keep her imprisoned in her basement. It just didn't make any sense. She wasn't hers. She was her own person. What did she mean by being hers? Like as a pet? She was a pony, not a pet. Why did she have to do that? "Fluttershy. I'm not yours. I'm my own pony. You can't have a pony as a pet. It doesn't work like that. I don't want to be here, you can't own me" Twilight desperately explained, her voice raised Fluttershy stopped and slowly turned around. At first she looked viciously angry, but she slowly grinned a sadistic, maniacal grin "Oh no Twilight, I think you'll find I can have you. And I will have you. Despite your best attempt you are still here, and you will be for a long time". And with that she left, the heavy door thudding into place. Twilight raged in her mind. She wasn't hers. She wasn't. She would show Fluttershy that. She would make sure that no matter how long she was here she would not be scared as she had been that first time. Eventually all would be good. She swallowed the pills with the refreshing drink and went back to reading on the sofa, hoping to nod off fairly quickly. After about fifteen minutes Twilight realised she might be enjoying herself slightly too much. The text started to swirl around the page and the usually dim colours of the room seemed unusually bright. Her head started to sway and spin. Despite the strange and slightly frightening experience, it didn't feel in the least bit displeasing. It felt amazing. Suddenly Twilight was forgetting everything and getting completely caught up in the moment. The ecstasy grew higher. Nothing else mattered to Twilight at that moment. Not even her imprisonment meant anything anymore. She was on top of the world. She was the one. It was thrilling! She never wanted to come down off the almighty high. Colours danced and flashed in front of her face. Rainbows did somersaults over sparking shapes. Twilight just rolled over onto her back and enjoyed the show. After a few hours, the colours started to fade. Twilight was flat out on the sofa, her body and mind completely relaxed. As she came off the upper, she quickly fell into a deep, undisturbed sleep. She awoke late the next morning. At first she felt embarrassed at how juvenile she had thought under the influence of the drug. Then she felt foolish that she had been tricked that easily. Then she felt stupid that she had enjoyed herself so much when she was in a situation as bleak as this. It felt so good, like nothing else she had ever experienced. She thought maybe Fluttershy would bring the drug again... No. No way. She knew how bad it was. She wasn't a junkie. Heck, what was she thinking about? She had been kidnapped, drugged repeatedly and now was trying to tell herself she wasn't a druggie. She couldn't let herself be drugged like that again. Fluttershy was just messing with her mind, and the truth was, it was working. As she tried to move she found once again her body was under the influence of the dreaded drug. Breakfast was already there, and she ate and finished off the juice she had saved. It was when looking for a new book to read that she discovered the notepad, with a pencil. Twilight had an idea. Using the pencil, she engraved two tally marks in the wall behind the sofa. She then turned her attention to the notepad. She wrote at the top of the first page: 'Day 1'. She chewed the end of the pencil contemplatively, and then furiously scribbled the events of the day. She then began 'Day 2' before burying herself in the book. Hours passed. Lunch came and went while Twilight patiently awaited rescue. She waited, and waited, and waited. It would come eventually. She would just have to wait. Fluttershy came again with another meal, and later once more. This last visit surprised Twilight, until she remembered the two small pills she had held in her hoof the previous night. Her stomach sank. She knew how good she would feel, yet she knew she didn't want the drug really. She had already made it up in her mind. She wasn't going to let Fluttershy mess up her mind like that again. "I'm not taking those pills, Fluttershy. Not after how you tricked me yesterday" Twilight called out through the dim light that she had grown accustomed too, but Fluttershy struggled to see through for a moment. "I thought you might say that. That's why I put it in your drink, I just came down to see that you'd drunk it, that's all" "Aaargh. Why would you do that? I thought you wanted me? Don't you want to look after me? Why do you keep doing this? This is going to kill me" she shouted. Fluttershy just smiled, then grinned again "It will be ok Twilight, it will be all ok" And she left. Already Twilight felt the oncoming effects of the drug. Soon she was just a heap of unconscious pony lying flat in the sofa. From then on things fell into a routine. Meals, books, and nightly Fluttershy would find a way of forcing two small pills into Twilight, and the ballerina of colour would begin, and end as always with unconscious sleep. Many lonely days passed, but Twilight kept writing her diary, at first to keep track, then out of habit, then later just to stay sane.
Chapter 3MLP chapter 3 Day 3: Another day alone. It's hard to imagine I've only been here three days, it feels like weeks. I'm still keeping healthy though, Fluttershy seems to feed me well, although the continuous drugging may cause side effects upon rescue. Day 4: The meal was drugged again. At breakfast I told her I will refuse the meal. At this Fluttershy promised me that she wouldn't drug it so long as I ate. This backs up my previous theory that she doesn't mean to hurt me, she just wants to keep me, almost like a pet. The endless tedium of not having anything to do but read is beginning to wear on my mind. Fortunately Fluttershy brought more books, novels this time. I hope the variation helps, but I think it's just prolonging the inevitable. Day 5: I should have seen that one coming. Fluttershy insisted I took the drug. By that I mean I had no choice. It was either I took it or she injected it. She wasn't violent, I think that's why she relies so heavily on drugs to hold me in the first place. It was like a sick parody of getting a child to eat vegetables, first she asked, ('I would really like it if you did') then pleaded, ('come on Twilight, it's for the best in the long run') then threatened ('if you don't I'll have to do it myself, and you know what that means'). She said it in a way that made me half expect her to say 'don't make me count to three'. What could I have done? I reluctantly took the pills, but made it perfectly clear I didn't want to. I told her I would never be hers. Then Fluttershy did something I never saw her do before, she scowled at me. A deep, hurtful scowl with fire in her eyes. I was quite taken aback by this, but soon I was taken over by the drug again. Day 6: The constant semi dark of the basement is breaking me. I can't tell what time of day it is. My body clock is broken. I'm not sure if I should be eating, sleeping or reading. It's the lack of sunlight. Without the rise and fall of the sun each day I can't make sense out of anything. Oh what I'd give to see the sun again. I miss the smell of the outdoors as well. In the basement it's just the same, all day, every day, every time of day. It's disorienting. I'm starting to feel dizzy from it. Is this cabin fever? I don't even know anymore. Day 7: A week has gone by. Celestia must be looking for me by now. There's no way a future princess goes missing and no one looks for her. I'm still confident the search party is out there. They will find me eventually. I will be rescued. I will. I know things take time but a week here feels like a month. I'm just desperately hoping they will come soon. My patience is wearing thin. I just need somewhere outside of these four walls. But I know they will find me, so it will be all ok. It will. Day 8: The cabin fever is slowly progressing. There's nothing I can do to stop it. I'm trying to do other things besides reading, like arranging the shelves, or trying to dust. Just anything to occupy my mind. It did little to help. I just hope something happens soon. Day 9: What is taking Celestia so long? Surely they will be searching here soon? I am having to remind myself it's only been 9 days. How long does it take to solve a case like this? Several weeks? I'm scared to think what might happen to me in those weeks. I'm loosing my grip on things. Day 10: Nothing to do. But I've already said that. Many many times before. I need something to do. The waiting would be fine, if I had something to do. I've got nothing to do, so I just sit here reading. All day. At first it was ok, then it was boring, now its frustrating. It's turning me inside out. I need a clock as well. Just something to tell me what I should be doing. It's like I'm on a roundabout, I can't tell where I am, where I'm going and what is next. Only with time. If I had a clock, something to set my body clock by, I think I would be better. Day 11: Today I got fed up with not knowing what time of day it was. There is a small, grimy cellar window, the kind that is on the floor at ground level, but above the ceiling in a recess on the wall here, barred by iron strips and well beyond my reach. It was so grimy I couldn't see anything, barely light at all. So I waited, watching to see a change in the light. I don't know how many hours I was there waiting, but I saw nothing. I just sat there, hoping to see something, a sign sign maybe, not quite sure what I was going to see. But I saw nothing. I haven't eaten all day. I've just been staring at the window. Fluttershy will come and make me eat, and then drug me again. There's no escaping it. It's the same old same old. Day after day, always the same. I can't stand it. Day 12: It's not cabin fever. Im going stir crazy. Noting to do, nothing to do, nothing to do. I found myself pacing around the room, chasing my tail, simply just for something to do. I flung myself at the shelf and threw everything around, breaking half of it, just so I had something to tidy up. The glass bottles I threw cut my skin, but at least that gave me something to think about besides nothing. I've been having mood swings, like one moment I could be reading and the next I'm smashing glass again. Then I'd go and sit by the window and aimlessly stare again. I'm going insane and I know it. I can't help it. Day 13: Fluttershy noticed the mess I had made. Overnight she emptied the room of anything that I could hurt myself with, or break, or throw, besides books. I feel powerless. I can't do anything, not even hurt myself. I am completely at the mercy of whatever Fluttershy chooses for me, and yet she chooses nothing. I wish she would do something, or at least give me something to do. There's no break from the routine. Every day it's just meals and drugs. That's it. I, physically, cannot do anything else. I'm trapped. I can't cope. I'm loosing it. I've had everything taken away from me, everything. My entire life. And it's been replaced by nothing, and endless, empty stretch of nothing. Did I die at the cart incident? Am I in hell? What do I have as my existence? Four walls, a covered window, exactly 14 stairs, a sofa, an empty shelf and books. That's it. There's no escape. No escape. Day 14: 2 weeks. 14 days. 336 hours. 20,160 minutes. 1,209,600 seconds. I know this because I worked it out. At least 50 times. No rescue. No hope. Celestia must still be out there looking for me. But there's no way she could take so long to do this, not with all the royal guard. I don't understand. She can't have abandoned me, could she? Could she? I'm still holding to the hope that she is looking for me. She would be. She cares about me. I was going to be a princess. She wouldn't leave me. She wouldn't. She wouldn't. I will hold on to that hope. It's the only thing I have left. I only she knew how much I need her right now. Day 15: Like a candle that is running out, my faith in Celestia is dwindling. My hope is draining away like my ability to think. I still hope she will come, but it's now not as sure in my mind. I'm running out of things to write here. I don't have anything to write about, because I don't have anything to do. Still. Just nothing. I'm not thinking right. I know I'm unwell. I've been sat here staring at the wall for the whole day now. The only thoughts in my mind were 'no escape' 'nothing to do' 'no hope' over and over. I must hold on hope. I will be rescued. Without that hope I am nothing. Day 16: I know I said that without hope I am nothing. But now I feel as if I've been reduced to exactly that. Celestia isn't coming. I am mostly certain of that now. This is it. I've been resigned to spend the rest of my life here, imprisoned, slowly going insane. For as long as I live. I've been crying all day. There just is no way out. I've given up all hope of ever making it out. How many futile hours have I spent at the door, pounding and working magic to no avail? The drugs saw fit to that. How many times have I tried working the iron loose around the recess in the ceiling where the window is? It's no use. I've given up. But I can't even do that. I can't just walk out on life. You know what I mean by that. There nothing I can do. I must stay here and suffer. But why? Why is this happening to me? I caught myself calling out to no one in particular, calling for help. But no one is coming, no one will help. I'm on my own. Day 17: I didn't realise just how much I appreciated my friends until I lost them. Or rather they lost me. I want them back more than anyone can imagine. I would die a thousand deaths just to have one conversation with them all again. After all I've been through in my mind, Pinkie Pie's hyperactivity, Rainbow Dash's over confidence, Rarity's prissiness and Applejack's stubbornness all seem like a welcome break. I haven't left my sofa all day. Mostly I've been asleep, dreaming away my life until it ends. I dreamt of Celestia, what life would have been like. I dreamt of escape, but whenever I awoke I realised it would never work. I dreamt of everything me and my friends ever did together, all we accomplished. I'm happier in my dreams. I never want to wake up to this hell again. Day 18: Dreams. They're only dreams. I might be happy in them, but whenever I wake up I'm reminded of what I have as my life now. Nothing. I can't sleep. I'm not tired. Yet I want to sleep. I don't want to be awake in this purgatory. I discovered an alarming fact today. Every night I'm waiting for Fluttershy to come. I'm waiting for the drugs. I need them. I want them. With them I can be away from this dungeon. With them I can escape. I'm not scared to admit it anymore. I hope they kill me. Just let it end already. Please, I don't want to be here. Someone help me, please. I can't take it anymore. Please help. Please. Just end my life here. Day 19: I'm not thinking right. Something has broken in my mind. The same thoughts seem to be playing in loop in my head. I can't help it. It taken over my mind so much I can't concentrate on doing anything else. Not that there is anything else to concentrate on Day 20: ...No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape. No escape... Day 21: Why am I keeping this journal? I hope you've seen enough, Fluttershy. I hope once you've looked through this, I know you will, you'll see how much you've hurt me. I'll never be yours. Why would you do this to your friend? Today Fluttershy came to see me. After 3 weeks. She tried to talk to me. I... I don't know what to think. Every part of me wants to hate her, but the company was, well, needed. It's difficult to explain. I hate her. I hate her a lot. But after isolation, I need her. Why is she doing this to me? I can't help it, she has messed my mind up so badly. I need those drugs, to get it all out of my head. I'm craving them. Without them I don't know if I could cope. Day 22: Fluttershy. I know you will read this. I hate you. I hate you with my entire being. My burning hate will always be there, even once I'm dead and gone this diary will carry my utter disgust. I hate you. I HATE YOU. How much I want to hurt you, you will never know. How badly this fire inside me longs to tear you apart. How much I would give to make you suffer. You could never understand. Today she came to speak to me again. Of course she would. That's what she always wanted. Because I'm 'hers'. No I'm not. And I never will be. I realise what she is doing now. She is making me dependent on her, so I will have to come to her for help. Just as I fell into insanity she comes and 'saves' me. But I'm not falling for it. I can't wait until this day is over and I can escape. Day 23: I don't think she understands. I hate her. Yet she seems so happy when I talk to her, even when I make it perfectly clear I don't want to. She must be as insane as I am. First I tried ignoring her. She kept on talking. Then I tried ending the conversation. She changed the subject. Then I asked when she would let me go, and she just laughed and said 'never, your mine, Twilight'. I'm so sick of her saying that. Nothing I said made any difference. I'm not giving up, though, I have one more plan. Tomorrow I will make it perfectly clear I'm not drawn in by her tricks. Day 24: Well I didn't expect that. But then again I'm not quite sure what I expected. She came to see me again, as has been routine these past few days. She began talking but this time I spoke out and told her I would never be hers and that no matter what she did I would never like her. It was very satisfying. After a minute long shouting fit I expected her to drug me or go away, but she didn't. She actually laughed. I had shouted, screamed and wailed at her and all she did was laugh. What can I do? I can't hurt her, she's invincible. I'm powerless. I can't even get her to stop talking at me. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not sure if I should just give in and be hers. Would that get me anywhere? I'm not sure if I care anymore. Day 25: I'm not giving in. I've decided that much. I'm not playing her games. I'm not hers. Again she came today, but now I've started fighting back, at everything she says I'm cutting in and shouting back with hurtful remarks. It feels good to see her hurt. It's the one last thing of mine she can't control, my speech. It's a triumph of mine, a victory. Even if she is determined to keep me as a pet, I'll make it so that she could never like me. It's my rebellion, my act of defiance. There wasn't much she could do. Every conversation we had ended up as an argument. She wasn't expecting it obviously. She was visible shaken by it. I'm glad of that fact. This is the way forward for me. Day 26: For the last few days a shocking fact has been haunting me. It's always been there at the back of my mind for the past week now, but recently it has been made clearer. I'm craving drugs. The sleeping pills I'm taking. Last night Fluttershy was late coming, probably due to our skirmish earlier. But I'm craving them, I need them to sleep, I don't feel right without them. It didn't feel right not having them this late. It's a startling truth, one I'm not willingly accepting as such. But at the end of the day it is. I'm not feeling angry as such, just nervous. What will this mean? I suspect these feelings will pass again and the all to familiar rage against HER will return. But even now I'm getting butterflies in my stomach. I'm addicted to drugs. What has become of me? I'm sat here in a gibbering heap of insane pony, waiting for death to come. I'm saying to myself 'Oh Celestia help me' but I know not even she can save me. I'm not sure which I prefer, complete insanity, or knowing what I have come to know. I wish Fluttershy hadn't tried talking to me now, and taken me out of my trance of insanity. I was better off running into walls than thinking. Day 27: It was too much to ask wasn't it? That my little rebellion would work? Today, she came again. As I had done yesterday and the day before I fought back. Since she had been shaken at first and then annoyed yesterday I expected something today. At least something. Nothing. Well, that's not true. She laughed it off again. She actually said 'Its so cute when you do that'. She actually said THAT. Just when I think I'm getting somewhere, just when I'm making progress, she turns around and crushes it. I can't win. There is no future where I come out on top. The best I can do is try, but I will always fail. I'm not giving in, but I'm never going to win. This worthless price of futility is all I have. Day 28: Back into a routine. Back into insanity. A routine of nothing. An endless stretch of empty nothing. Fluttershy's appearances to 'talk' have simply been added to the routine. Before long I will fall back into the depths of hell I came from. But what was I thinking? I've already been through this, many times before. There is no way out. No escape. This is my life. Here we go again. The same old things. I can almost feel myself sliding back. Twilight didn't know, she couldn't have known, but it was true. Fluttershy's actions over the past few days weren't just the beginnings of a new part of a routine, they were the beginnings of something much bigger. They were the beginning of the end. Author's Note Just one more chapter after this fellas. Wow this was originally going to be a 5k words short, but I couldn't help myself :P Big thanks to everyone who has faved this I honestly expected it to be ignored! Thanks for the motivation. Love you allx
Chapter 4MLP chapter 4 For a month Twilight had waited, waited for a chance, a mistake on Fluttershy's part. Not at all times patiently, but she waited. Fluttershy wasn't perfect, and so therefore had to make a mistake somewhere, surely? Well, you would be right. One day it happened, so much without warning that it came to a shock to Twilight. Tea had been served. Today's meal was tomato soup with thick slices of buttered bread. As Fluttershy left Twilight has grown accustomed to hearing a heavy thunk as a metal bolt was drawn across the door. So when she heard nothing but silence a twinge of hope ignited in her heart. She waited, as if expecting at any moment to hear the familiar sound. The silence continued. Butterflies wriggled in her stomach. This is what she had been waiting for all this time. She felt her heart thumping faster and faster. Almost in disbelief Twilight refused to believe what she has perceived until she had felt the door for herself. She suppressed her panicked hope for fear that she had misheard. She hauled herself up and took a few tentative steps towards the stairs. In all her time here she hasn't grown immune to the effects of the miracle drug Fluttershy used to keep her imprisoned. She dragged herself up the stairs step by slow step. She was sweating, could it be true? Could she finally have a chance to escape? After what seemed like hours she summited the steps and shuffled along to the heavy door. For a few seconds she stared at the door contemplatively, wondering what she would do if it was locked. Her weeks of imprisonment had turned her pessimistic and cynical, and she expected it to be locked and her to be crazy. She almost wanted it to be so she had an excuse to feel the way she was. So when she shoved the door gently and it opened Twilight fell over in surprise. She scrambled to her feet and looked around nervously. She couldn't believe this had happened. Was she dreaming? No, this was real. She regained her balance and slowly stumbled along the corridor, praying Fluttershy didn't play her party trick of appearing out of nowhere. Fortunately she didn't. She made it to the end of the corridor. There was a windowed door ahead that seemed to lead to the back of the kitchen. She apprehensively looked around the room, expecting to see Fluttershy's grinning face staring at her from a vantage point, hypodermic needle in hoof. She even looked up to the ceiling. She wasn't falling for that one again. Placing a hoof on the handle, she pushed open the door. It let out a long, drawn out squeak, but besides that, there was dead silence. Twilight awkwardly straggled across the hard kitchen floor towards a door. Through the window in the door she could see a dazzling light. Daylight. Finally she had seen the sight she believed she would never see again. The gorgeous red sun radiated down onto lush green meadows, and animals milled around munching on dewy grass. It was a perfect sunset. Twilight rushed towards it. All that lay between her and escape was an inch thick slab of wood and glass. The square of heaven seemed to fly towards her as she advanced. Opening the door she took a breath of fresh air, her first in a month. The scent of pollen and grass filled her lungs. She bursted out into the open air. The intense light was almost too much for Twilight after her weeks of darkness. She squinted heavily and looked around. There was sweet smelling trees around her, with rolling hills of thick, soft grass stretching into the distance. The smell of outside overwhelmed her. It was intoxicating. Putting a foreleg over her head to shield her eyes from the slanting evening sun she located a single track that led over a small, sparkling stream and into the town, just half a mile away. She was free at last! At long long last she had escaped! Twilight began to walk towards the town. Slowly and unsteadily she dragged herself along the road. Weeks of dependence on drugs made her unsteady. Night quickly fell. What would have taken a normal pony about ten minutes took Twilight in her weakened state over an hour. Her joy at escaping quickly subsided into a physical struggle to keep walking. It was like trying to climb a mountain or run a marathon. She almost felt like she couldn't carry on. Every step was a struggle. A pang of worry struck her. Could she make it into Ponyville if she tried? She dismissed the thought. She would rather die trying than go back. The time quickly came that Fluttershy would come to her with the drugs for sleeping. Twilight was shaking from the physical exertion but she knew she had to carry on. To admit defeat now would be impossible. She was feeling very ill now, she presumed from the sheer exertion of struggling against the drug. Or was it physical exertion? Something definitely wasn't right with her. Something else, besides exhaustion. She stopped walking, stood still and took stock of her situation. Something definitely wasn't right. Being a faithful student and having read books on self diagnosis before, she ran through a few simple checks. Twilight felt nausea, muscle aches and cold sweats. Her stomach dropped. She recognised those symptoms. She knew where but desperately didn't want to admit it to herself. She didn't want to face it. She was dependent on the drugs. Her rear leg twitched. She wanted to go back and get some more. She knew she couldn't, but she wanted to. She carried on walking, hoping the exercise would shake the symptoms away, but instead they progressed. The cravings grew more and more intense. It was like Fluttershy had attached a leash to her hind leg that was reeling her in. It was a mental struggle to press on. She had doubts as to whether she could make it back. She knew she had to try. Half of her wanted to say she would rather die trying, but as the pain intensified she knew that wasn't the case. She looked up to see how much ground she had covered. Barely half way. A long long way still to go. She carried on. She knew it was only a matter of time before her body packed in, but she hoped that time would come after she arrived in town. Minutes passes like hours. Every step intensified the worry and sickness. But she carried on. The evening soon settled into dusk. At her achingly slow rate the scenery was immediately more apparent to Twilight. Fluttershy had chosen, of all the places, to live right next to the Everfree forest. Looking at it again, she still shivered at the sight of the crooked branches and deep, pitch black shadows, concealing unspeakable evils. In her weak condition, she would have no way of hiding should a Manticore or Timber Woolf appear. Or Fluttershy. The temperature quickly dropped under the clear indigo sky. It would have been a beautiful sight if Twilight had the peace of mind to enjoy it. Silvery blue swathes of countryside rolled into the distance, and trees became outlined in shining white. Twilight's shivering and twitching progressed, half due to the temperature, half otherwise. Her stomach cramped. She clutched it with a forehoof and lowered her head in pain, her face twisted. Grimacing, she took another step forward. The pain refused to go away. Focusing on the scenery hadn't done anything to solve her problem. It was becoming harder and harder to walk. She looked back at the house that had been her prison for so long. It seemed so far away, yet so did the lights from the town. If she couldn't make it to the town, she had no choice, she would have to go back. But looking at it now, she seemed to be exactly half way. If she couldn't make it to town, she couldn't make it back either. She has gone too far to turn back. She was on her own now, until she reached safety. She slugged on, falling into a routine of throwing herself at the next step, then the next, then the next. Every step was a battle in her mind and body. This continued for what seemed like hours, until finally her step faltered. She slumped against a tree that chaffed against her matted fur. Looking between the house and back, she felt as if she was out at sea, swimming against the tide from one shore to another. If she stayed out, she would die. But exhaustion, or whatever it was, prevented further movement. She was sweating, despite being freezing. She was shivering, although not getting any warmer. Het head pulsed and she saw stars. Her stomach cramped again, her mind a turmoil of pain. She was drowning, the shore just too far out of reach. Drawing on inner reserves of strength the stood up and desperately tried again to move. She scarcely made it to the next tree before collapsing. She could hear nothing but her own heavy breathing. Was this it? Was this all she had? It couldn't be. She tried lifting her legs to drag herself to her hooves, but nothing came of it. Instead she could only watch the world as time passed. But not much time passed before something happened. Within a matter of seconds an all too familiar face calmly floated down from the heavens to come against Twilight's. Twilight knew this was the end. "I allowed that, to show you how useless trying to rebel is. Come on Twilight, wouldn't it just be easier to accept it? You're mine." A small pinprick in her hind, and soon her mind was laid to rest. The next day brought with it a cold, bleak light. Red adorned the outline of the thin, jagged clouds that clung to the horizon, as if they were blades threatening the ground to retaliate. A stiff breeze ran it's fingers through the branches of the forest, rattling as it went. The weather was changing for the worse. As Twilight regained consciousness the truth stabbed her through in a wave of hopelessness. Her only chance of escape had passed her by, now the only thing that lay ahead was the eternal purgatory of imprisonment. There would be no more mistakes. That was it. She had her chance, but failed. She had been here before, feeling these feelings and thinking these thoughts, but never like this. Something had snapped that last night. The all to usual self pity and grief were gone. In replacement was pure, unadulterated hate. Her lengthy time of insanity had removed any semblance of Twilight Sparkle and put in place an effigy of hate. Instead of hope, there was depression. Instead of fear, there was recklessness. Instead of optimism, there was cynicism. Twilight was no longer Twilight. Her mind was sucked dry, void of all emotion other than twisted depression. She had become a snake, poised and ready for ambush, waiting for another chance to get back at her captor. And as soon as she could, she would. But that wasn't the only thing to have changed in recent days. Fluttershy too, was sliding further and further into the mind trap she had set herself. Of course, she had Twilight as hers, no one could refute that, yet still something was lacking. Twilight didn't want to be hers. That could be expected. But even now, when it would be so much easier to give up and accept it, she still fought. Even after all this time she still actively refused. Why couldn't she just accept her fate? She doesn't need to fight back, she has everything provided for her. Fluttershy just didn't understand how this situation could still feel so empty. That is why she let Twilight out, so she could see for her self how fighting is not worth it. There's no point being awkward, when you could just go with it and be fine. She hoped Twilight would see that now, and things would be different. That Twilight would see things from her perspective, and how she didn't need to feel anger towards her. She had done all she could. After all, that was the reason why she had done so, so she could have Twilight and not loose her. She just wanted to always be there for her, to care and look after her, forever. And she was doing so, but still it just didn't feel right. Though with the new development, this might change. Fluttershy carried the cooked breakfast along the corridor to the stairs. The door was unlocked. She floated graciously down the stairs and smiled at Twilight. Twilight wasn't looking, she was staring at a patch of wall in front of Fluttershy, but she felt the air of hostility around her friend. Her smile wavered, but remained. She cleared her throat. "Twilight, breakfast is ready" she spoke Twilight turned and glared straight at Fluttershy with frenzied intensity. Fluttershy was quite taken aback at the aggressiveness of her stance. "What use does it make? If I refuse to eat you will only force feed me. You won't let me just curl up and die, will you?" came the curt reply. Fluttershy laughed gently. "And why would I do something like that?" "Because it's what I want to do" Twilight said firmly. There was a moments grim silence. "You don't need to fight, Twilight. All I wanted was to be here for you, and I have been. I'm looking after you. I'm not your enemy, I'm your friend. There's no need to be like that, so why carry on?" "You're not my friend" she said shortly. She stuffed her mouth full of food and refused to talk. Fluttershy gave up. She gently lifted off the ground and floated up the stairs, not locking the door as she went. Many conversations had gone like this before, but none held the same significance as this one had. Things were changing, and Fluttershy was changing too. She had already given it time, and things hadn't improved. She was at a loss as to what had gone wrong. Why would Twilight say something like that? She was her friend, wasn't she? They were all friends. But things were so different now. Twilight was different. Her intentions were innocent, she hadn't meant any harm to anyone, let alone Twilight. She just didn't want to loose a friend. She couldn't live with the loss of a friend. That's the reason for her shyness, because she is permanently scared of loosing what she has. So she made sure she would never loose her friend. But things didn't exactly go to plan. She shook herself. The morning was still young, but Fluttershy has things to do. She didn't need to lock the door anymore, Twilight couldn't escape, she was fairly certain of that. Besides, she needed something to clear her head. Underneath her Twilight silently waited for a thud that meant the upstairs outside door has closed. Fluttershy had left. Picking herself up off the floor, she made her slow way over to the stairs. She knew what she had to do. Ascending the stairs she contemplated the prospect before her. Strangely there was no emotion. No fear, no dread, no apprehension. She reached the corridor. There wasn't even relief, no hope, just in case her plan died before she did. Reaching the kitchen she looked around. Fluttershy was nowhere. To her left was the wall, painted a simple off white. Ahead was the door that lead to the outside, it's window casting a rectangle of harsh light onto the stone tiled floor. To her right was the kitchen proper. On one side there were old cupboards below and above the working surface and a sink. On the far wall was a cooker. On the side nearer her was a desk like working surface with cupboards above and stools below. There were several drawers by the sink, but Twilight quickly found what she was looking for on the desk. The knife rack held several long, sharp blades. Not the type that would look inappropriate in a kitchen, but long and sharp all the same. Clutching at one with two hooves, she picked out of the wooden rack a thin but pointy one, about three inches long. It didn't need to be long to cut her throat. She raised it to her throat to take aim, lowered it to her chest, took a deep breath in, and collapsed to the ground. The clean knife clattered to the ground right next to her chest, as Fluttershy reclaimed the needle that pierced her flesh at the base of her spine. She wouldn't even let her just curl up and die. Fluttershy looked on with mixed emotions burning her heart like cyanide. She stared as Twilight's eyes filled with rage and then gently closed, her mouth preparing to scream obscenities at her before loosing and hanging open as she crumpled up on the cold stone floor. First there was quiet anger that she would try to do that. That was quickly dispelled as it was always. Then came sadness, that Twilight honestly felt like committing the act. Then came utter depression in knowing that her actions had done such a thing. Fluttershy stood and stared at the corpse-like body that lay before her. Her mind raced, a mixer of volatile emotions. She was having yet another revelation. She felt this way the night Twilight declared she was becoming an Alicorn. Then she realised she never wanted to let Twilight out of her sight, never wanted to loose her. Now, things are different. True, Twilight would never be out of her sight again. But that creature in her basement was not Twilight. It could never be Twilight again. She bad broken her. In the act of preserving her friendship, she had lost it. Twilight was conscious, she just hadn't opened her eyes yet. That put the metaphorical axe through that idea. Now life became a game of waiting. Waiting for food, waiting for a chance to hurt her captor, and maybe, just maybe, just waiting for a chance to escape, alive or not. All the empty hours spent now meant nothing. They passed by without Twilight even noticing. She knew now that her life was nothing, she had no choice. The only thing left was to take Fluttershy down with her. Slowly the red sun rose into the grey sky. Through a thin layer of hazy cloud, vague shadows shrunk with the passing of time. The grey haze thickened and thinned as spring rain showers rolled across the miserable sky. The sun seemed forgotten, trekking a solitary path from horizon to horizon, at midday having no more strength than it did at sunrise. Wildlife seemed to have forgotten to wake up, and the waterlogged fields were void of animals. Besides the pitter patter of rain, the landscape was oddly silent. At noon the sky was darkened as a heavy shower was pushed across the sky by a team of Pegasi. Down below on the ground Fluttershy was thinking. Not intentionally, but as she worked, her mind was chipping away at the problem that seemed so insolvable. What went wrong? A large vulture was perched on the window sill, staring intently away from the portal to freedom by his side. He had once been a handsome bird, soaring majestically on currents, without moving a muscle. Then he broke his wing and was grounded for several weeks. Fluttershy found him entangled in a tree, half dead and helpless. Now, after all this time, he refused to take to the skies once more. It was a sad sight, really. The once proud flier grounded, too afraid to return to his former glory. Fluttershy had been pleading with the animal to at least try, but it was no use. It wasn't that he was a nervous creature before the accident, he was always bold and full of bravado and pride, but the crash seemed to have taken away that confidence. He had changed. He just wasn't the same. "Honestly, you've not been the same since, it's as if you are a different person..." There was a long, drawn out silence as an epiphany hit her like a blackjack. It was a revelation. Of course, that's what went wrong. It was obvious now she looked at it this way. She had taken Twilight, but after everything that happened, she had changed. Twilight wasn't Twilight anymore. Just like the vulture had lost it's former self, Fluttershy had lost the former Twilight she knew and loved. It made sense to her now. How could she have ben so stupid before? For a short while that new idea pleased her, after all, it was the solution to her problem. But that made her stop and think more, and after a bit, her half smile was wiped from her face as the full impacts became clear to her. Just the same as the vulture, Twilight wasn't coming back. Not now, not ever. It was suddenly quite clear to her, what she had done, what that entailed. She had done everything to make sure, to be certain, that she would never loose a friend. A friend that she thought she could never live without. But now that friend was gone. In the very action she took to save her friend, she had lost her. And it would never, ever, be the same again. Fluttershy thought back to all she had subjected her friend to. All the pain, all the misery, all the heartbreak. Her friend didn't deserve that. No, she had been cruel, hurtful and had damaged her friend. She knew that now. Emotions coursed through her in a surge that engulfed her. Sadness, pain, depression, anger. She just wanted to take it all back, say sorry and have it over and done with. Just to forget everything about the last month. But she knew she could never do that. It had gone too far, too long. Twilight was broken beyond repair, and it was all her fault. She couldn't do anything about that. This time, there was no getting away from it. She would be banished, her friends would never see her again, and she would be an outcast. She could never live with that. She could never live knowing she had done what she had done. But she would have to. Sooner or later, she would have to face up to her punishment, whatever that meant. And it all starts now. She stared at the vulture, and at the desk like working surface on which it's shadow was cast. She knew what she had to do. Twilight hadn't moved. She didn't feel the need to. She heard a familiar creak as the door was pushed open. She didn't react. Now was her chance. She would ignore her, completely blank her. It would be as if she didn't exist. That is the only thing in her life she had left to control, was when she spoke. And she would control it. Still staring at the wall, she didn't see Fluttershy standing there in the doorway. Instead of trying to illicit a response, Fluttershy glided over to in front of Twilight's face. Still she didn't see her, she seemed to look straight through her. "I'm sorry" Fluttershy said, simply "What? Sorry? No, you don't get it do you? Sorry is when you step on someponies hoof, or spill a drink on someponies carpet, this is not sorry. Sorry just doesn't cut it here, and never could" "I know. I know you could never forgive me, and I couldn't either. That's why I'm doing this" she said as she raised the knife from where it was tucked into her wing. Twilight flinched and scrambled backwards, ready to give one final struggle before Fluttershy put her out of her misery for good. It was what she wanted, but she wasn't going to go without hurting Fluttershy as much as she could. She was closer now, advancing with long wingbeats. Raising the knife above her head in her right hoof, she prepared to strike. Twilight ducked back further but it was no use, Fluttershy would always be in reach as long as she could fly. Bracing herself, Fluttershy closed her eyes, took a deep breath and brought the knife down. It found it's target, sinking into the soft flesh. With a single swift movement, there was a soft patter as a spurt of crimson liquid sprayed onto the wall, and a muffled clump as the body of a pony fell to the floor. Then, there was silence. Twilight looked at the corpse of her friend. A small trickle of blood from her severed neck formed a trail down into the grout of the floor. She felt the passing of something, as if a huge weight was lifted off her. It took a few seconds for everything to sink in. Fluttershy was dead. Her captor, gone. She was free. As if all of a sudden, the old Twilight groggily awoke from her grave inside her mind. It was over. The torment was no more. That was it, it was done. She was free at long, long last. No more empty nothing, no more insanity. No more passing time, waiting to die, no more drugs. Twilight smiled. Life would soon return to normal for her. She could leave, nothing was stopping her, she didn't have to spend a minute longer in this place. She turned to the stairs and made her wobbly, unsteady way to the base, grinning wildly. She turned and saw the motionless body at the centre of the room. She felt sad that it had to end like that. She wished her friend would have just let her go. She was sure after a while Fluttershy could have returned to normal. No one had to die. It was obvious she was insane, but her base intentions weren't bad. Twilight still couldn't see her point of view, but she was sure she hadn't meant to hurt her. One thing above all made Twilight think: maybe if she hadn't been so horrible to her, she wouldn't have felt so bad. After all, in her insanity she had been quite mean. But could she have avoided that when the mental bonds of her treatment messed her so? It was confusing, and painful to think about. That her friend had slid down into that low state of mind made for a twinge of pain in her liberation. Twilight would miss her shy friend. Taking a few bottles of drugs Fluttershy has displayed in the kitchen, she opened the door. A cold red sun met her. The skies had long since cleared themselves of the grey film that wreathed the horizon, and now an indigo bowl was left to greet the unicorn as she walked out to meet a cool, fresh air that welcomed her back to life. Author's Note Well that's all folks. Thanks for reading this pile of crap, I know it's not brilliant but it's only my second story, and my new one is going to be better by a country mile, so please check it out. I'm not sure if I can keep the teen rating with this, I mean suicide and blood spurts are kinda bad. Or maybe I should put a gore tag on, I don't know. Let me know in the comments, also constructive criticism is very welcome. Once again thanks!
