Celestia's Creamy Caper

by Danupert

The only chapter

Load Full Story

Celestia was excited.

Scratch that.

Celestia was very excited, delighted even, thrilled perhaps, wild, in fact... so yes very VERY excited

After months and months and MONTHS of waiting... it had finally arrived... the double triple extra quintuple chocolate caramel cherry delight, famous for making lesser ponies vomit after eating a mere teaspoon-full, ordered all the way from a small village in the Griffon Empire, well known for producing some of the richest, and most indulgent desserts in all of in the Griffon Empire, and indeed, on all of Equus.

It had taken so long for the alabaster princess to find an uninterrupted evening when she could gorge herself on an entire tub of the stuff (if she was going to make herself sick she was going to do it right) , and the day had finally come, the day she had been waiting so long for, was finally here.

She had already teleported down to the cellars to retrieve the wondrous ice cream, had stopped off in the kitchens to grab the largest spoon she could find (a soup ladle used for the fancy banquets)   and was now back up in her personal chambers, and was eyeing the tub like a lion eyes a gazelle, if by 'lion' we mean all powerful alicorn with a sweet tooth the size of Manehatten, and by gazelle we mean a tub of the finest ice cream in all the land (which, of course, we do)

Yes this was it, she would finally get to-

Time seemed to slow down as Celestia’s magic faltered, she was so busy thinking about eating the ice cream, that she didn’t even remember to keep the simple levitation spell surrounding the tub going. Her pupils shrunk to pin pricks as the tub of -what was in her mind- ambrosia, fell, tilting to the side mid-air as the container came ever closer to the floor. And then-

*SPLAT!*

The  tub managed to flip around mid air, and the ice cream was now all over the, previously, spotless marble of her bedroom floor, an island of delicious stick brownness in a sea of cold white

No..

She thought

All those months of waiting... and this is what happens

The princess of Equestria fell to her knees

Must it all end like this?

A small thought occurred to her, sure most of it was on the floor... but some of it wasn’t even touching the marble... surely if she just ate that bit and left the rest...

I could... but... NO I’m a princess! Not a dog!

But slowly the small taste she had had of this special dessert a few months back on her annual visit to the Griffon Empire crept into the front of her mind once again: the luxurious taste of the chocolate and caramel, counteracted by the sharp flavour of cherry... she let out an audible moan at the mere thought.

So... good... a lick or two wouldn't hurt, surely?

It started as a few tentative licks from the sun goddess, and built to her taking large bites, but soon became her barely taking a breath in between mouthfuls of ice cream, the princess of Equestria, shamelessly eating off her own floor.

That was, of course, when the door to her chambers creaked open

“Greetings Tia! We just wished to talk with you about the-”

Celestia froze as the cheerful tones of her sister’s greeting bounced of the high walls of her bedroom like so many trumpets of doom, sounding off in a cacophony that pronounced the lunar diarchs’ arrival into the room, and the soon-to-be headline all across Equestria.

She slowly turned to face her sister, royal gob still full of griffon produced cream, and locked eyes with the midnight blue alicorn, the two sisters simply stared at each other, one trying to figure out WHAT IN THE HAY the other was doing eating off the floor, and the other trying to figure out WHY IN THE HAY the other had just interrupted them eating off the floor.

The silence was so heavy, you could have stuck it on the end of a stick and called it a hammer.

Celestia slowly swallowed her mouthful and began in a calming tone “Now Luna, I know what this looks like-” but was cut off by the sound of thunderous (Celestia literally felt like she was in the middle of a storm of giggles) laughter from Luna, with small snippets of barely comprehensible speech mixed into her joyous outburst.

“ HA HA HA, Y- YOU SHOULD SEE THYSELF SISTER, HAHAHA, OH CREATORS YOUR FACE!!!”

This carried on for over a minute until Celestia was getting tired of it, a scowl pulling at her chocolate covered lips, and her sister was rolling on the floor, clutching at her sides and laugh so hard that it came out as wheezes, before returning to a sound more like lightning bolts hitting a large brass gong.

“Sister please-”

But no, Luna paid no heed to the agitated alicorn, and continued rolling about, laughing like a thunderstorm. It got to the point where Celestia decided to simply to take her sister in her magical grasp, and dump her out of her room, leaving the younger alicorn rolling around in the corridor, shaking with laughter, but she could still hear the laughing, oh yes, it was finding its way through the cracks in her door and continued pounding on her eardrums, relentless in its mission to remind her that she had just been caught by her sister, eating- no, chugging ice cream from the floor.

She scooped up the rest of the ice cream off the floor, shoved it in her mouth, drew her curtains, and then flopped, very un-princessly, onto her bed.

Boy, future Celestia really is going to regret me eating all that ice cream

Just as that thought entered her mind, she felt a rumbling from her stomach, and a bitter taste came to her mouth, as she rushed to her bathroom.

                                                                                             THE END