The Ponyville Killer
By Red Velvet
Lyra's body lay on the floor of apartment 6A in a mangled heap. Yellow police tape held back any ponies that might want to get a closer look at the first Ponyville murder in twenty years. Distant screams and cries from Bon Bon could be heard in the next room over, but Spectrum didn't care. He had a job to do and he was going to do it. He looked down and examined the room again. He hadn't even the slightest idea of what to do in a murder investigation.
"Badge!" Spectrum called over his shoulder to the newest recruit at the PVPD.
"Coming." Came the reply followed by a light gray pegasus running up holding a Starpony coffee.
"Why would you bring a coffee to an ongoing murder investigation?" Spectrum asked with a sigh.
Badge looked down at his drink and then turned back to his boss. "This? I found it on the counter. I figured it was Lyra's so I took it to save Bon Bon the trouble." He took a sip of coffee. "Man that's a good cup of joe."
Spectrum facehoofed and grabbed the coffee, throwing it towards the trash can, but missing by a foot.
"Now," Spectrum said trying to focus on the case. "What do we know about what happened here?"
Badge nodded still upset over losing his coffee. "Right. The neighbors say they heard a scream at around one o'clock and Bon Bon got home to find Lyra dead at six."
Spectrum nodded and began walking around the room looking for clues. After looking around for about ten minutes he sighed and sat down on Lyra's couch.
"I have no idea what the hell I'm doing." He confessed to Badge.
"Well, sir." Badge began. "Up in Canterlot they have murders and robberies all the time. Maybe we could ask one of them for help?"
"And make the PVPD seem weak!" Spectrum growled. "Never. What we need is a citizen of Ponyville that we can hire as a private eye. But who?"
Badge shrugged. "I dunno, but if we're done here then I'm gonna go down to Starpony and get me a big old cup of coffee."
Spectrum sighed and followed Badge out of the apartment.
*******************
Twilight Sparkle sat in the coffee shop eating a pastry and reading a new book. She had been looking forward to getting this book for weeks and when it finally arrived she almost passed out.
"What!" She cried out. "The murderer was Cherry Cakes!"
As soon as she said two men dressed in police uniforms came charging up to her. One was a young looking gray pegasus wearing a ridiculously oversized badge. While the other was an older unicorn with a long sharp horn.
"Who did you say was the murderer?" The unicorn asked.
"It-it was Cherry Cakes." Twilight stammered. The whole situation was confusing her and she still didn't understand why these boys in blue were talking to her.
The two cops brohoofed. "Looks like we nabbed our killer." The pegasus said smiling.
Twilight stared at them with a confused look on her face. "Wha-what?"
The older one responded. " m name is Spectrum and this is Badge. We work for the PVPD and we'd like to ask you a few questions on how you know who the murderer was."
"Well," said Twilight still confused. "I read it."
"A confession note!" Badge said happily.
"Well, actually it wasn't a confession." Twilight said. "Holly Fruit figured it out."
"Excellent." Spectrum said happily. "Now where is she so we can pay her?"
"Umm... She isn't real." Twilight said to the two strange cops.
"What!" They both said in unison.
Twilight laughed. "She's a character from my book."
"Oh." Spectrum said. "I feel like a bucking idiot."
Badge sighed. "I guess we'll have to solve Lyra's murder ourselves."
"Lyra was murdered!" Twilight said gasping.
"Duh." Said Badge. "Don't you watch the news?"
Twilight nodded. "Of course. I've just been so into this book I haven't done anything else."
Spectrum shrugged. "Whatever. Come on Badge let's go find a pony who can help us solve this murder."
Twilight stared at him excitement flowing through her. "I could help you solve it!"
Spectrum looked at her. "Do you have any qualifications?"
Twilight thought for a moment before answering. "I've read over a thousand murder mysteries."
"That's good enough for me." Spectrum said shaking Twilight's hoof. "Welcome to the Ponyville Police Department."
Twilight smiled. This was going to be fun. She knew it.
***********************
When the purple unicorn finally arrived in her library home she found her baby dragon, Spike, franticly pacing back and forth.
"There you are, Twilight!" He said running up to her. "I was afraid Lyra's killer had got you too!"
Twilight giggled. "Oh, Spike. Why would the murderer want to kill me?"
"Because then the murderer can steal the books from the library!" Spike shivered at the thought.
"Why would a murderer want to steal from a library?" Twilight said confused.
"Because they're cray cray!" Spike said looking over his shoulder for murderers lurking within the bookshelves.
Twilight just giggled and walked over to a nearby desk full of unopened mail.
"Let's see," She said skimming through it. "Bill. Ad. Coupon. Bill. A letter from my brother."
Just then a loud high pitched scream broke Twilight from her thoughts to see Spike laying in a wet puddle. At first Twilight feared it was blood, but then she noticed it was urine.
"Spike? What's wrong?" Twilight said while rushing towards him.
"I-I..."
"What, Spike? What!"
"Spider."
"Are you bucking kidding me."
"It was huge!"
Twilight Sparkle fell over laughing at Spike. "You... Spider!" Was all she managed to say between laughs.
Spike frowned angrily at Twilight before going over to his bed to pout.
"Watch out for spiders, Spike!" She called still giggling.
*******************
Twilight walked into apartment 6A and looked around. She had never been to Lyra's apartment before and she didn't really like the design. After a quick glimpse into the kitchen she found Spectrum and Badge standing over a white chalk outline of a pony.
"There you are." Spectrum said when he noticed her approach.
"Hi guys." Twilight said waving a hoof at the two cops as she approached. "I was wondering. Did Lyra have any enemies?"
"That's a good question." Badge said nodding.
"Well?" Said Twilight. "What's the answer?"
"How should I know?" Badge said shocked.
Twilight facehoofed. "Ok then. Did you check the apartments security cameras?"
"This place has cameras?" Spectrum asked.
"What's a camera." Badge asked genuinely confused.
"Spectrum, can you go down and get the camera footage from the front desk? Badge, can you go count the number of steps their are on the stairs? It could be important."
The two cops nodded and left Twilight alone in Lyra's home.
"Now I can look for clues!" She said happily.
Twilight began to walk around the apartment checking under pillows and searching sofas for clues. When Twilight walked into the kitchen she found a hoof print on the floor.
"My first clue!" She squeaked.
The unicorn pulled out a camera and took a picture of the evidence. When she got up she turned to see Spectrum had returned.
"You've got to see this." He said grabbing Twilight's hoof and pulling her into the hallway. As they walked toward the lobby they passed by Badge who was still counting steps.
When they finally reached the office they turned on the footage they were looking for.
"No!" Twilight said when she saw the pony who had entered the apartment building.
"Do you know this pony?" Spectrum asked seriously.
Twilight nodded. "She's one of my best friends. Her name is Fluttershy."