“I never wished to do any harm to anypony. I’m leaving Ponyville.”
Scootaloo’s serious declaration took her two friends totally by surprise. They had expected to spend the day together, playing and crusading to their heart contempt. Not that Scootaloo would announce them she would go away.
“What do you mean you’re leaving?” asked Applebloom. “You mean for some holidays or something?”
“I’m just leaving, forever. I wanted to come and say goodbye.” replied Scootaloo. “I’ve got to go now.”
“Wait!” shouted Applebloom. “You can’t just leave us like that. Aren’t we your friends anymore?”
“Yeah.” added Sweetie Belle, “What have we done to you? What’s going on all of a sudden?”
The question was more than pertinent. Not only Scootaloo’s behavior was really strange and her seriousness was almost frightening, but she was wearing a dress, which they thought she would never do on her own will.
This was asking many questions that they wanted answers to.
“We have the right to know.” said Sweetie Belle. “Maybe we could help.”
Scootaloo looked at them and a huge wave of sadness seemed to submerge her eyes.
“I can’t tell you. Believe me, you really don’t want to know. I don’t want you to know.”
The pegasus was about to cry. That simple fact terrified her two friends. Scootaloo had almost never showed any tears in public, preferring to hide behind anger or hatred not to look weak in the eyes of others or, more importantly, in her own eyes.
“Well, we will be the judge of that.” replied Applebloom. “Just tell us what it is.”
But the pegasus clearly wasn’t ready to speak, even if she probably wanted to. So Sweetie Belle thought of another approach and proposed to her friend to, at least, stay a little more time for one last cup of tea together, as a departure party.
She was able to convince Scootaloo and they sat around the table with the hot flavored water in front of them.
“Where are you going?” asked Sweetie Belle. “So we can come visit once in a while.”
“I don’t know. As far away as possible.” answered Scootaloo.
Those words were too caricatural even for the filly not to understand Scootaloo had probably done something wrong and didn’t want to bear the consequences of her acts. In the end, it was probably only a big overreaction. A strange one, but still nothing too serious with some luck.
“Say…” began Applebloom, slowly getting Sweetie Belle’s plan. “If we aren’t going to see you ever again, could you stay a little longer and help us tidy up the house?”
To her surprise, Scootaloo accepted. She exchanged a look with Sweetie Belle and they both smiled. It probably really wasn’t as serious as they had feared it would be.
The three fillies spent some time fighting the dust and rearranging what little furniture they had and it seemed that Scootaloo was slowly relaxing and coming back to them. Sometimes, she would even smile as you do when you think back of a good joke, but some other times, she would grimace as if something was still bothering her heavily.
The night came and Scootaloo was still with them. Proving their action had been effective.
To pursue with the plan, Sweetie Belle and Applebloom engaged in a discussion about the only subject they were sure would work: what cutie mark they were going to get one day.
“I heard about something called quantum physic. Maybe if we can figure out what it is, I could become a quantumer physicianist something.” proposed Applebloom.
“Did you know that some ponies spend their whole life writing stories?” asked Sweetie Belle. “Wouldn’t it be nice to just stay at your home and write all day long?”
“You mean like an essay for school?” replied Applebloom. “That seems like the most boring job ever.”
And eventually, what they awaited happened when Scootaloo took the initiative to speak. But her words weren’t the expected one, as there was no cutie mark proposition, but a strange question instead.
“Say…” began the pegasus, “Do you think that, if you get your cutie mark and you don’t like it, you can still go crusading to find a new one?”
Her two friends looked at each other with the same surprised and lost expression on their faces.
“Why would anypony want to change her cutie mark?” asked Sweetie Belle, as if she was stating the obvious.
“Yeah.” added Applebloom, “A cutie mark tells you who you really are and what you are meant to do with your life. I mean, why would you want to change who you truly are?”
“When I get my cutie mark” began Sweetie Belle, “She will be so awesome I most certainly never would any other. Just like my sister.”
“But” replied Scootaloo, “Would it, just theoretically, be possible in your opinion, if the pony just didn’t want the cutie mark she had gotten, let’s say, if Applebloom was to get a rock as a cutie mark.”
She had thought about saying an orange before remembering about that part of Applebloom’s family.
“Why would I get a rock as my cutie mark?” asked Applebloom, upset to be taken as the example. “I don’t have anything to do with… rocks. I’ll get my cutie mark for something great and amazing.”
“She is right you know.” said Sweetie Belle to Scootaloo, “I don’t know anypony who would like to change her cutie mark, it would just be plain stupid.”
“It’s not stupid!” shouted Scootaloo in an outburst she quickly took back under control.
Her two friends backed away a little. They didn’t expect such a reaction. Still, reassured about the retrieved calm, they began do discuss again.
“Okay, if we accept that, for some reason, a pony would want to change her cutie mark, and I still think that nopony ever would…” tried to elaborate Applebloom, “Then she probably couldn’t. Because the cutie mark says who she is. Nopony can change who she really is.”
It was logical. A cutie mark truly does represent a pony’s destiny and there was not much point trying to fight one’s own destiny. Even magic had no impact on cutie marks, as Applebloom had had the opportunity to experiment at least two times with Twilight and Zecora.
Sweetie Belle agreed. It was vain for a pony to try and go away from her destiny.
But Scootaloo wasn’t sharing that opinion.
“You’re wrong.” she told the two others, “It must be possible to change it. It has to be.”
“But why, why do you bother about that ? Unless…”
And just saying those words, Applebloom understood, just at the same time as Sweetie Belle, what it was all about.
“Scootaloo!” she shouted joyfully, “You got your cutie mark!”
In her opinion, it was a great thing, something worth being celebrated. Obviously, the pegasus wasn’t thinking the same way. But she didn’t deny what was true. She had gotten her cutie mark.
“So what is it?” asked Sweetie Belle, pretty happy too about the news. “Is it why you’re wearing a dress today?”
Scootaloo nodded.
“I can’t show it to you. I won’t.” she told her two friends. “It’s not mine, it’s not me. I don’t want this cutie mark.”
“Oh come on.” said Applebloom, “You can’t just not show your cutie mark to your two best friends.”
And being more sensible, Sweetie Belle tried to add:
“Is your cutie mark related to your difficulties for flying? Is it what bothers you?”
It made Scootaloo laugh. Just genuinely and happily laugh.
“You’re really happy for me, aren’t you?” she asked her friends.
“Of course we are.” they both answered at the same time.
“I really don’t deserve good friends like you, you know?” told them Scootaloo, “Until the very end, you’ll have been the best I could have ever hoped for. Caring, joyful. It’s true when they say you don’t know what you’ve got before you’ve lost it.”
“Hey” replied Applebloom. “You haven’t lost us. We are still her and we are still your friends if you accept our friendship.”
“I’ll leave now.” said Scootaloo, “I really must leave now. It has been a pleasure and an honor knowing you.”
But Sweetie Belle wasn’t ready to let her friend go away like that.
“Wait just a moment there.” she told the pegasus with enough authority in her voice to make her stop. “You can’t go like that. Not after what you’ve said. I’m sure that you don’t have to go like you say. You’re overreacting, that’s all. Just show us your cutie mark and let us share what is really bothering you, like true friends do.”
Scootaloo thought about it. Her friends could very clearly see that she was fighting inside her mind over two opposite wishes, in a big mix of different emotions. They just didn’t know what was at stake, they just hoped for the best.
“You really want to see my cutie mark?” asked Scootaloo, back to a more serious and dark tone.
“Of course we do.” answered Applebloom, not the least impressed.
“Even if it could put you into danger?” asked Scootaloo again.
When she heard the word danger, Sweetie Belle hesitated. She wasn’t sure if she was truly ready to face any real danger or if it was wise to go blindly where it could be dangerous. But Applebloom decided for her.
“I said of course we do, are you deaf or something?”
Applejack’s sister, just as Applejack herself, was a strong pony, even if only a filly. She wasn’t frightened by just words.
“Alright.” said Scootaloo.
And for some reason, she smiled at that moment.
She moved to the door and shut it, standing between the door and her friends. Then, she took her dress away and, showing the most atrocious cutie mark the two other fillies would ever see in their whole life, she told them:
“I got it this morning. I didn’t want it. It’s not who I wanted to become. But it just all happened too fast. And now, I can’t come back. Not anymore.”
“But what is it?” asked Applebloom, as scared as she was confused.
“It’s the cutie mark that says who I’m really supposed to be, my destiny that I despise, but my destiny nonetheless. It’s the cutie mark I received when I ended the destiny of another pony, one I loved above all others.”
“You mean…?” asked Sweetie Belle, slowly understanding and shocked beyond measure by what she was understanding.
“She will never fly ever again. She won’t ever smile to me and she will never be able to hug me anymore. Because of me. Only because of the despicable me.” answered Scootaloo, whose face was contracted by the anger and covered with tears.
A silence ensued.
Neither Sweetie Belle nor Applebloom knew how to react. This was just off chart. Something nopony was prepared to face. And the worst was to come.
“You don’t even know why I stayed with you.” said Scootaloo. “It wasn’t just because I was happy to be with you.”
And her look began to lose contact with reality in a terrible way.
“I wanted to leave because I feel the need to hurt you too. I was just enjoying the thought of how I would harm you and dispose of you.”
Scootaloo’s words were ringing like a death knell, with passion and madness. And sadness, a huge, incredible powerful sadness.
The three fillies stayed quiet. There was no way out. Scootaloo was blocking the door and her friends could see that they wouldn’t have time to escape through the window. They would have to fight, and probably lose. Which meant losing absolutely everything.
That was a fight they were not prepared for.
Applebloom was not ready, but in her mind and for her pride, she was willing to accept that ultimate confrontation. She would make her big sister proud and prove that she was worth of the Apple family.
But Sweetie Belle got that they would have probably no chance in a frontal fight with somepony whose special talent was putting her at a disproportionate advantage over them. Would they be able to escape the house, it was night outside and they would probably lose the chase… And even more, she didn’t want to fight. Because it would have meant hurting Scootaloo. And she didn’t want to hurt her friend.
At the time being, she wanted to help her.
Harvesting a courage she had no idea she even possessed, she came closer to Scootaloo and with a very gentle and caring voice, told her scary friend:
“It’s okay Scootaloo, I understand. I won’t fight you, I’m here to help.”
The pegasus was surprised, but ready to counter any trick. She had become, after all, a professional.
“If that’s the choice you want to make, then I won’t oppose you.” continued Sweetie Belle, not showing all the confidence she would have wanted and slowly beginning to cry too. “I don’t want to live in a world where you wouldn’t be my friend anyway.”
Applebloom saw the scene and her flow of adrenaline dropped. Suddenly, she understood that she didn’t want to fight either.
“I won’t fight you either.” she told Scootaloo, “If that’s who you have decided to be, then I guess that I can only try and help you the best I can, being your friend and all.”
Now they were acting mad too. And they truly didn’t want to suffer the consequences of Scootaloo’s destiny. But something was telling them that their friend needed help. They didn’t know how to provide such help, but were willing to try, following nothing but their heart.
It was stupid. It was literally suicide.
But it worked.
Scootaloo looked at them, trying to get where the trap was, but saw only caring and gentle looks from two ponies who were holding a very special place in her heart and soul. A part of the pegasus was telling her to finish the work as soon as possible, as she was getting weaker by the seconds. She had every reason to finish them. They knew too much, they were compromising and their suffering would give just so much to enjoy. Scootaloo could smell and taste the blood already and that was intoxicating.
But on the other side of things, a part of her was pulling her away, shouting and fighting with all her willpower to overcome her fears and just remind her of one simple fact. Just one day ago, she would never have.
“I would never have.” She whispered, in total confusion.
But she had done it in between. And there was no turning back. She had done something that had stained her for the rest of her life, that she could never repair or repay, she had no choice but to go along where her new destiny would take her.
She truly had no choice, she had just ignored it until then. But it was becoming clearer and clearer.
She fell on the floor and cried, defenseless, alone and wishing for the nightmare to just stop.
She felt two pairs of hooves comforting her.
Applebloom and Sweetie Belle exchanged a look. They were happy to still be able to see each other and feel each other. Happy to be able to enjoy the world for some more time. Still, they didn’t know what to do.
“It’s okay.” tried to say Sweetie Belle into Scootaloo’s ear. “We are with you.”
“I didn’t want to, I never wanted to, I don’t want to!” shouted in response the pegasus, not to her friends but to destiny herself. “I swear that I’ll better die myself than harm anypony anymore!”
And there was so much conviction in that voice, so much passion and authority that destiny probably heard her in her far away place where she hides and probably got afraid.
Because when she glanced at it, Applebloom suddenly realized that Scootaloo’s flank was blank. Totally blank.
She made the two other fillies notice. But not one of the three could believe it.
“I…” began Sweetie Belle. “It’s not possible.”
“A pony’s cutie mark can really change?” said Applebloom, not capable to grasp the implication.
But Scootaloo didn’t rejoice with them. She was just crying, all withdrawn on herself. Her two friends understood. Even if she was given a new chance to become somepony else, the past hadn’t been altered. Some things couldn’t be changed, even with all the willpower in Equestria and beyond.
They hugged their pegasus friend and all cried together for some time.
Then, when they had no more tears to spare, Applebloom decided to take the initiative.
“Scootaloo, where is her body?” she asked.
“What?” asked in return, surprised, the pegasus.
“We should go and bury her, that’s the least we owe her.” explained Applebloom.
“And then what?” asked Scootaloo with a little anger. “Then what?”
“Then…?” asked herself Applebloom. “I don’t know. I guess we keep on living, whatever happens, but together.”
And being just fillies after way more emotions than they should have ever endured, their hearts began functioning normally again, telling them to keep hoping for the best and just not expect the worst, just as the sun outside was announcing the dawn of a new day.
THE END
Author's Note
I wrote that story because "The mark of the innocent" (the longer version of what I'm trying to tell here) wasn't satisfying me by a long shot. So I took the core ideas and put them in a way smaller but, in my opinion, better story that focus only on what's important.
Now, am I just unable to write big stories because of a lack of time or because I'm just bad, I don't know, but at least I can say I have tried to develop things a little and I don't think it worked.
