Chapter 1
Where are we?
What can I say? I got bored. This is the product of a twisted mind with far too much time on its hands. Don’t bother saying it doesn’t make sense, I know it doesn’t, It’s not really supposed to.
I don’t even know what I’m saying.
I own nothing. ]
Twilight groaned as the alarm blared. She rolled over in bed and slapped at the alarm clock until it stopped making noise.
She stumbled out of bed and made for the stairs. Rubbing her sleep-filled eyes, she didn’t notice there WERE no stairs until she stepped down where the first step should have been, tripped, and preformed a truly magnificent prat-fall onto her ass.
Retrieving her slippers and rubbing the sore spot on her rear, she padded around the strange house. It consisted of four rooms, a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen, and a lounge room of sorts with a flat screen and a couch.
The kitchen had a coffee maker. She didn’t drink coffee. Today was a good day to start, though.
She didn’t remember coming here. She hadn’t been to any parties- even if she had, she rarely drank.
Oddly, she was still dressed in her usual skirt-and-blouse-and stockings outfit. She usually changed into an old t-shirt and shorts she used for pajamas. Curious, she went to the wardrobe and opened it up.
It took her a moment to process what she was seeing.
The wardrobe contained nothing but- SWIMSUITS.
What the hay?
Most were decent. But some were rather ridiculously skimpy.
Almost afraid to do so, she moved on to the drawers. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that the drawers contained her usual blouses, skirts, stockings, and underthings.
But what was going on? What was-?
She stepped over to the window and threw open the curtains.
Her jaw dropped.
“No way.”
Unable to believe what she was seeing, Twilight went to the door and threw it open. She kicked of her shoes and stepped outside, her feet sinking slightly in the warm sand as she stared at her surroundings in shock.
Palm trees. Sand. The ocean.
What in Celestia’s name…
“Hello, Twilight!”
Speak of the devil. Well, sun goddess, technically.
Twilight turned to question her teacher, but stopped cold.
“Princess! What- What are you wearing?”
Celestia glanced down at herself, then grinned at her student.
“As little as possible, Twilight. That dress is really quite stuffy.”
Twilight picked her jaw up off the ground and nodded, still rather shocked that her teacher would wear something that bared that much skin.
“Our sister has gone mad.” Grumbled Celestia’s raven-haired companion, trying- Futilely- to make her own one-piece (and much more modest) swimsuit cover more of her leg.
“Oh, don’t be such a spoil-sport, Luna!” Celestia cried. “I’ve been saying we needed a vacation for literally eons. And here it is, dropped right in front of us!”
“Oh, wondrous day.” Luna said with only the slightest bit of sarcasm in her tone. She tugged aggressively at the neckline of her swimsuit, trying to make it come up further. The only thing she succeeded in doing was setting her breasts bouncing rather energetically.
Twilight shook her head, trying to clear her mind. What was going on? Was this some sort of bizarre dream?
“Where are we?” she asked, trying to NOT sound like she was about to have a panic attack.
Luna ignored her, still tugging on her swimsuit. Celestia shrugged, setting her own breasts bouncing.
“No idea. Come ON, sister, I want to work on my tan!”
Celestia quite literally dragged her sister down the beach. Luna protested and struggled valiantly.
“Be wary, Twilight Sparkle!” Luna cried out. “’Tis something strange afoot!”
Twilight took in the entirety of her surroundings. It was very warm and humid, the sun telling her it was about nine ’o clock on a summer day.
That made no sense! It was winter in Pennville.
There was one explanation that Twilight usually fell back to at times like this. Because Magic.
There were about fifteen mid-sized bamboo huts lined up neatly on the beach. They were all more or less the same as the one she’d woken up in, which was on the far left, and all looked to have four rooms each.
A tropical island in the middle of nowhere. Some sort of resort. Which meant-
Absolutely nothing.
A couple of huts down, a door swung open. A familiar flat-chested, rainbow-haired girl in a blue tank top and shorts stepped out, looking about as disoriented as Twilight.
Twilight waver her hand and waved to at Rainbow Dash, trying to attract her attention. Rainbow glanced at her, unlimbered her wings, and swooped over.
“Twilight! What’s going on? Where are we?”
“I have no idea, Rainbow. We’re on an Island somewhere.”
“No shit, Sherlock. I thought you were the genius girl here.”
“Like I said, I have no idea.”
Rainbow groaned and sat down cross-legged. “Am I dreaming all this?” she glanced up at Twilight. “No, if I was dreaming, you’d be naked by now.” She muttered to herself.
“What?”
“Nothing. “ Rainbow blushed furiously. “I didn't say anything.”
“Well.” Twilight said, giving her a strange look. “If this is a dream, then we need to find something that wouldn't normally happen in real life. That should give us enough information to determine if we’re awake or asleep.”
With a loud squeal of glee, Pinkie pie came charging out of one of the huts, wearing a two-piece bikini, rubber floaties, swim fins, and a false moustache. She reached the shore and jumped impossibly high, grasping her legs and cannonballing into the ocean.
A gigantic wave washed over Twilight and Rainbow, soaking them both and leaving them spitting salt water.
With a disgusted noise, Twilight reached into her blouse and pulled a fish out of her cleavage.
“Yeah, that doesn’t help.”
Rainbow laughed.
"Pinkie Pie, you're so random!"
Pinkie Pie waded out of the water, giggling.
"I know, right? This is fun!"
She skipped over, breasts bouncing. Rainbow's wings snapped out with an audible POOMPH!
Pinkie giggled again.
"Well..." Twilight said. "Whether it's a dream or not, I suppose it won't hurt just to sit back and enjoy it."
"Oh, Dah-ling!" a familiar voice with a ridiculously thick Cantelot accent cried out.
"Hide me!" Rainbow squeaked, ducking behind Twilight.
