The Scootaloo Diaries

Chapters

Pre-entry: Happy to Be Here
Entry: Innocence
Entry: Torn in Two
Entry: Torn in Two: Leaving

Pre-entry: Happy to Be Here

The latenight moon sent its dim light trickling through the open window of a dark and cluttered bedroom. It washed over the tired eyes of a young mare, whose gaze stayed fixed on the ceiling. She began to shiver as the cold night breeze crept in, her head aching. Her small orange wings suddenly fluttered as she placed her front hooves over her churning stomach.

Drifting clouds slowly fell over the moon casting dark shadows over the room once again. The mare shuddered and brushed the long fuchsia mane from her misty eyes. She shivered in bed, her mind absent of thought as trembling breaths fell from her cold, dry lips.

Her eyes drifted to the dusty blades of a ceiling fan that squeaked as it slowly rotated, the chain dangling from it clanking against the base like an offbeat metronome. She drearily let her hoof fall across her head as the clanking reverberated through her skull, sending pulsing aches through her every bone. With a deep breath, tears welled up in her purple, bloodshot eyes. She wiped them to realize her foreleg was terribly dirty and ruffled. She began to choke and coughed into her hoof. As she pulled it away, her vision went blurry with welling tears.

Scootaloo forced herself out of bed, sliding onto the hardwood floor as she wiped her eyes. She dragged her hooves up to a small desk and grabbed a thick journal, then flipped it to a blank page and began to write.

They say everypony has a fair chance in life, that we're all created equally. The sad truth is that nopony has the same chances or privileges as another. Some are destined to shine, and be happy in life without ever really trying. Others will work their lives away for just a taste of happiness, and die regretting never having found it.

You see, some ponies are meant to be failures. They're meant to struggle at the bottom of society and claw their ways up with hard work and sheer determination. At the top of the barrel shines a bright, warming light, luring the poor out from the darkness. The promise of a better life fuels them, and keeps them motivated. They work for years on end, flipping burgers, running cash-registers, fixing toilets. They fall into the promise, the lie, the never-ending, mundane cycle that eventually chokes the light from their eyes.

The dreams die with them, and their time is served. However, that isn't the life that everypony is forced to lead, not by any means. Some of us are born with a diamond tiara on our heads and a silver spoon in our mouths. Some of us have it all without even trying.

There are still others. Some ponies—ponies like me—wander the world just trying to find themselves. I wonder if I'll ever find myself, or my place on this earth.

Scootaloo closed her journal and dropped her cheek flat against the cover. A glimmer of light streaked across picture of her and Rainbow Dash sitting on the corner of her desk, and she grimaced.

"I never thought I'd miss you this much," she whispered towards the photograph.

From behind the picture, a Wonderbolts poster came into focus. She squeezed her eyes shut and forced the source of her idol's absence away.

"I wish you were here, I need your advice..." The young mare sighed deeply yet again, her heart torn.

***

Tick tock... tick tock... The clock ticked on and on, hammering against the wall with its taunting monotony.

I subtly shook my head, trying to match my dangling pink mane with the ticking like a pendulum to the clock. There wasn't much time left, then we'd officially be out of school for the summer. Needless to say, I was excited to spend three months away from my least favorite place in the world... well, second least favorite place.

The one downside to being out of school was that it meant spending more time at home. My stomach churned at the thought of my dad coming back home next month. If it were up to me, he could rot in prison for the rest of his life. I wouldn't miss him.

"Alright my little ponies, I hope you all have a great summer vacation. When you come back, you'll all officially be in high school. Isn't that exciting?" my teacher announced. That Miss Bumble Fly, she's such a floozy.

I jumped over my desk and rushed to the door, placing my wing over Apple Bloom's back.

"Hey AB, wanna hang out later today?" I asked, knowing she would.

"Of course I do, Scootaloo," she winked and nodded towards the exit. "Head on over to the acres in a couple hours and we'll meet up in the usual spot."

I nodded with a grin and she turned to another group of ponies ready to exit. My evenings with Apple Bloom were the highlight of my life. As always, I couldn't wait to spend more time with her, and it was the only thing I had to look forward to. I just wish Sweetie Belle could be here with us. Things have been rough since she left to Canterlot with her sister. Heh, at least she's getting the education everypony dreams of. That kid's gonna be a star. With a voice like hers, she'll go pretty far, I know it.

I watched Apple Bloom trot ahead through the halls and talk to her other friends. She was definitely more popular than me, and everypony in school seemed to like her. I just stood there and waited, watching her hug them and smile, not really sure what I was doing. I waved and smiled as a few familiar faces rushed by, but I was unacknowledged. I'm not really a pony-friendly kind of mare anyway, so I can't blame them. There's only one pony other than Apple Bloom that I really cared about at all in that school, and that was Silver Spoon. I thought about going to say goodbye, but at the sight of Diamond Tiara standing next to her, I instead turned and headed towards the exit at the other end of the hallway. I figured I'd drop my bag off at home and just go hang out at the acres while I waited for Apple Bloom to show up.

It was hot out. The heat washed over my body as soon as I pushed through the doors and stepped into the sunlight. The breeze felt nice at least, even though it blew the dirt from the roads into the air. I picked up my pace and felt my saddlebag slapping against my sides. The corner of one of my books pounded against my ribs, but I kept trotting despite the pain. I'm not sure why, but I liked it a bit, like a subtle sense of nostalgia. It's the little things in life like that, that really begin to let you know who you are and who you've become.

I stopped and let my bag rest to glance back at my cutie mark. I don't think I've ever hated the sight of anything as much as I hated that thing. I closed my eyes, but that image was imprinted in the back of my mind. It was all I saw at any given moment for at least a year after I got it. I so desperately wanted to know what I was meant to do in this world, and thought that my cutie mark would hold the answer. To my greatest disappointment, it arrived with more confusion than anything else. I woke up one morning to spot it as I trotted past my bedroom mirror. A white feather with a black tip and two lines spiraling around it. Even now I have no idea what it means, or how I could have invoked its appearance. What I thought would be the happiest day of my life still brings tears to my eyes with its memory.

I looked up and realized I was home. My old shack of a house was barely standing, and the maintenance it so desperately needs will likely never arrive. My mother and my uncle were too involved with their habits to pay any attention to it, or me for that matter. I took a deep breath and pushed through the front door. I could hear a foal crying—my cousin—and it stunk like cheap booze and cigarettes.

"I'm home!" I called out, but wasn't welcomed or greeted at all.

I glanced into the foal's room to see my mother sitting in a rocking chair with my baby cousin in her grip. She was looking pretty stressed out and talking to some pony I didn't recognize.

"We gotta pay him back before my husband gets home. If we don't there'll be hell to pay for all of us!"

The younger stallion recoiled at my mother's shouting lifted his hooves. "Look, I ain't got the cash, and business is slow this time o' year."

"I don't care! Find a way or I will!" She continued shouting at him, then shooed him away when the baby started crying. He then shoved past me, glancing down at me with a nasty look.

I dropped my bag in the hallway and headed back outside. Spending a minimal amount of time in that mess was always my goal, it seemed.

Back in the fresh air, I headed out to the acres. It was a short trot through town that led to the trail into the trees. I kept my pace up and got there quickly. The shade was a relief, and the apples were looking pretty good. I kicked at a nice and full tree a few times until a couple ripe pieces of fruit came falling down. Fresh apples were a gourmet meal compared to the cheap crap in my house.

I slumped up against the tree, nibbling at the refreshing apple. Birds chirped in the distance, and insects made their various... insect noises. I didn't mind the noise, it was actually pretty relaxing. There was always something nice about being alone in the orchard. I liked the way the sun speckled my coat through the dense leaves in the summer, and how I seemed completely alone aside from the wildlife. It was peaceful, so different from being home or anywhere else. But no matter how much I enjoyed the quiet, I couldn't wait for Apple Bloom to show up.

I started whistling to the sounds of the birds chirping. "Feather cutie mark? Maybe I'm a bird charmer, heh..."

I tossed my half-eaten apple into the air and caught it a few times. A couple pegasi flew by overhead and my mind began to drift. I wondered what they were doing, where they were going, then I began to think about the fact that I couldn't join them even if I wanted to. Maybe they were out on a search-and-rescue for a lost foal, or maybe they were thieves and were fleeing with a bag full of bits. Who knows?

A funny thought occurred: I'm a pegasus with a feather for a cutie mark, and I can't even fly. Interesting at the very least...

I really started wondering what was taking that filly so long. It had been at least an hour, and I was hoping she'd show up soon.

Boredom was really starting to sink in after what felt like an eternity went by. I stared up at the clouds through the trees, and noticed the faint hint of orange glow painting the clouds from the western horizon. It must have been getting late.

Plap!

A bag landed in my lap and I jumped.

"About time you showed up." I laughed and leaped up to hug her, but she quickly put a hoof on my shoulder and held me down.

"Now don't you give me that, you're just too early as usual." Apple Bloom plopped down next to me and wrapped a foreleg around my neck.

I pulled a little glass bowl out from the bag and grinned. It smelled good and familiar. It was a scent that I grew up with, but couldn't have identified until Apple Bloom and I had fallen into this habit. Sweet Apple Acres had been struggling and was approaching bankruptcy. Then when Granny Smith had to go to the nursing home, Applejack and her brother took on a bit of a side job. They started growing marijuana somewhere deep in the orchard and using the profits of muling it into Manehatten and Las Pegasus to more than keep the acres afloat. Apple Bloom started getting into the lots to sneak us a bit now and then to take the edge off. Considering the amount they move, they'd never notice a bit missing here and there.

"Y'alright Scoots?" Apple Bloom snapped me out of my thoughts, poking at my ribs.

"Yeah I'm good." I took a small portion on the tip of my hoof and tapped it in.

She struck a match and lit up a long taper candle that she had pulled from her saddlebag.

I took it from her and stuck the pipe in my mouth. With the tip of one hoof over the carb and a candle in the other, I lowered the flame onto the pale green grass. I inhaled and pulled the flame down, charring the herb. Once the clear tube was filled with white smoke, I released the carb and let it all stream into my lungs.

"Ahhhhh." I closed my eyes and leaned back as I exhaled into the breeze.

I always loved the first hit, and the dizzy tingling feeling it left in my head. My eyes teared up as I forced myself not to cough.

"Gimme that." She snatched the bowl from my relaxed hooves and helped herself.

I watched her carefully as she did what she did. I loved watching her, she did everything so smoothly and gracefully, even this. She could be a surgeon.

Her gorgeous red mane fell over her soft yellow cheeks as she leaned down and tapped the ash from the bowl. While she was packing it with a fresh hit, she glanced up at me and winked. My heart skipped a beat, and I smiled.

"You're in a good mood today, aren't you?" I asked while she took her puff from the pipe.

She looked at me with a cocky smile and tapped on her chest for a moment, then coughed out a breath of white smoke.

She continued coughing for a moment longer and cleared her throat. "Yeah, what's not to feel good about?"

"Good point. I do miss Sweetie though. I wonder when she'll be down to visit us again." I spoke without thinking. What was I doing trying to bring the good mood down?

"Yeah, me too..." I watched the smile slide off her face.

"Soon I bet. So has anything interesting been going on lately?"

"I got another letter from Babs. She says she misses me, loves me, and can't wait to see me again." Apple Bloom let out a bubbly breath and put on a goofy grin.

"I swear, you two should hook up or something, you're both way, way too close for cousins," I teased and slapped her leg.

She raised an eyebrow and shook her head. "Funny you should say that... wanna know a secret?"

I gulped, almost too afraid to ask. "What?"

"When she came to visit last Hearth's Warming, we kissed..." Apple Bloom chuckled and shied away.

"You what?!" I covered my mouth and began to giggle uncontrollably.

She threw her hooves up and waved then dismissively. "Wait wait! I shoulda told you this other part first."

"Pass. I've heard too much already."

"No, it's that we were talking to her parents, and it turns out that we're only related through marriage. So it's all good," she explained, casually tilting her head back.

"Still a little creepy if you ask me." I laughed and stuck my tongue out.

"Not really, but did I tell ya 'bout the rumors? I heard that Diamond's gonna be goin' down to Manehatten this summer..." She looked me in the eye and grinned.

"So? She goes down there every summer." I figured she must have more to say, so I played along.

"... permanently."

My eyes shot open and I jumped up. "Really?! Where did you hear that?!"

"Oh, it's just floatin' around the school. I think somepony overheard a teacher talkin' about forwarding transcripts or... something." Apple Bloom casually waved a hoof and looked back down, passing the bowl back to me.

"That would be awesome, I think. As long as Silver doesn't get too depressed."

I stuffed the bowl full and Apple Bloom shot me a distinct glance. "What exactly's goin' on between you three anyhow? Are you, like, Silver's call-girl while Diamond's away?"

I felt my heart sink into my stomach at those words. "No! I mean... I'm just, well, we're just friends and Diamond Tiara doesn't like me. So we can only really hang out when she's away."

Apple Bloom widened a skeptical eye and smirked. "And does this hangin' out take place in the bedroom?"

I blushed and laughed, but at the same time I wanted to hide my shame. "Look, it's not like that, okay?"

She shrugged and shook her head. I reached over to offer her the bowl before I took my hit, I wanted to think clearly. My dad, well my step-dad, getting out of jail and coming back home was bad news for me. I hate the ponies that he brings around and how they look at me and treat me.

"Hey, Apple Bloom, I was thinking about something."

She smiled and slowly blew a stream of smoke in my direction. I took a deep breath as she did so, and laughed.

"What's on yer mind, kiddo?"

"Heh, yeah. I was wondering what you think the chances are of AJ letting me stay on the farm with you guys for a while." I knew they were slim, but I hoped to at least get Apple Bloom to talk to her sister about it.

"Not sure. Why? Is everything alright at home?" Her eyes shone with concern as she leaned towards me.

"Yeah, for now. My dad's getting out of jail soon, and well, you know how I feel about that guy." I placed a hoof to my cheek and slumped down.

"Right, well I'll talk to my sister and see what we can't do. If worse comes to worse, I'll just sneak ya into my room at night." She winked at me and wrapped a foreleg lovingly around my neck.

I hugged her and scooted close. "Thanks, AB. I'm lucky to have you."

For a pony with very few friends, it meant a lot to have one as great as Apple Bloom. I really don't know where I'd be if not for her. It feels good having a pony to call my best friend, one who I know I can depend on no matter what. And just the same, I enjoy being there for her whenever she needs me.

"So how are things on the farm anyway?"

She shrugged and put the bowl away. "Okay I guess. You know, the usual and all."

"Right. Well if you ever need anything..."

"I know, I know. I can always count on you, Scoots." She leaned in close and nuzzled my neck, rubbing the tip of her hoof around my chest in circles.

I just closed my eyes and leaned back, never one to object to any physical attention from her. I could spend the rest of my life here. There are so many conflicting things I want out of life, but when I feel close to one, that one always seems to be the thing I reach out for and cling to.

I pressed my muzzle into her mane and breathed in her scent.

"Hey... I should be gettin' back soon. AJ says she needs my help around the farmhouse tonight." She looked up at me with her wide, adorable eyes.

Those words were heartbreaking, and I squeezed her with my front legs. "Noooooo, you just got here."

"Scoot, it's been like two hours. I'll come hang out with you tomorrow, okay?" She eased out of my grip and stood up, brushing herself off.

I stayed slumped against the tree and looked down. "'Kay," I muttered, letting out an overdrawn sigh.

She gave me a woeful nod and a smile as she trotted down the trail and away from me. I had no intention of leaving anytime soon. I looked back up to the sky and noticed the darkening orangeness that had appeared. It would be getting dark soon, and I'd be expected home, but I just sat there, thinking.

I thought about what it would be like to live with Apple Bloom. I mean, she's my best friend, but I think I get on her nerves from time to time. I'd hate for us to fight over anything stupid. Then again, it'd be better than living with my step-dad and his lowlife friends. I hate the way they look at me, and the older I get, the scarier they behave.

Birds fluttered away and stars began to appear twinkling in the sky one by one. They sparkled from behind the leaves and made me realize how long I had been sitting there, just thinking about nothing. The wind was a bit chilly, but I didn't mind. I just kept staring up through the trees at the night sky, mystified by its beauty. I think as I grow older, I'm learning to appreciate all the more subtle beauties life has to offer. Once you've been put in your mundane place, and dreams disappear, you'll learn to cling to anything that seems magical.

I really began to feel the sting of missing Rainbow Dash at that point. The way she used to hold me up and fly me through the sky still brings joyful chills to my spine. I hope she's happy with the Wonderbolts. I only wish she didn't have to travel so far away, so frequently.

I closed my eyes as I pictured her wide, confident smile and took in the cool, summer night air. Crickets chirped and there was a faint howl in the distance, and at that moment I decided it was time to head on home. I forced myself to my hooves and began down the trail with a slow, steady trot. There was something eerily charming about nighttime Ponyville, and the way the dim lights and street lanterns flickered throughout the dark city filled me with a hollow, lonely pit.

"Hehe."

I jumped, startled by sudden giggling. There were a couple of ponies trotting down another path, bumping one another and laughing. I realized that this would become a more common occurrence, I mean spotting ponies my age out and about at night now that school was out for the summer.

I ducked and stepped quietly down the trail, hoping they wouldn't see me or recognize me. The last thing I needed right now was to end up getting in a fight or something stupid like that.

I shook my head and continued trotting. My house was at the edge of a string of old rundown homes on the outskirts of town. They were the cheapest properties in the county, so it's no surprise that's where my mom decided to live. I think these rat infested shacks should be demolished, and we'd be better off homeless.

With yet another painful sigh, I pushed through the front door and quietly closed it behind myself. I saw my mom sitting at the kitchen table with a cigarette in her mouth. The ashes were piled up high, and her hooves here shaking.

"Y'alright?" I asked, hardly concerned.

"Go to your room kiddo, and be quiet." She didn't look up at me, and I could tell something was off.

"Something wrong? Am I home too late or something?" I started toward the refrigerator for a drink, but she stopped me.

"Scootaloo, do as you're told and get into your bedroom. Now." She stood up in front of me and nudged me away.

Without another word, I trotted into the hallway and took my saddlebag in my mouth as I headed towards my bedroom. My door was cracked open, but I always close it. I figured it was just my mom snooping around or something, probably the reason she's so mad at me right now, no big deal.

I dropped my bag down and flipped on the light, and lying on my bed was a big white unicorn.

"What are you doing here?!"

He smiled and chuckled. My heart sank into my stomach and I turned for the door, but he held the knob tight with his magic.

"Nuh-uh. Where ya goin' in such a hurry?" he growled in a deep, raspy voice as he stood and trotted up to me.

I was shaking, and I opened my mouth to scream, but before I could, he gagged me with a washcloth. My muffled shouting didn't do me any good. He turned me around and forced my upper body against my dresser. I could see myself in my mirror as he took my tail in his mouth and thrust himself against me. I tried to take the cloth out of my mouth but it was held tightly in place with his deep blue aura of magic. I tried to kick him off of me, but he was impervious to my hooves.

"Shh, stop fighting and this'll be better for both of us." He grinned and looked me in the eye through my reflection.

I stared back at him with pure, burning hatred. I never felt that I could murder another pony before, but at that moment, it was exactly what I wanted to do. I spread my wings and flailed against the dresser, kicking and fighting as hard as I could. He then struck me in the back of my head with a powerful hoof, and I stopped moving, dizzy and unable to think.

I closed my eyes and felt my tears soaking my cheeks. Suddenly a searing, unimaginable pain coursed through my entire body. I bit down on the cloth and screamed into it, but just couldn't make a sound loud enough. I opened my eyes for a moment and looked at myself. My tears flowed down my muzzle and splashed onto the polished surface of my dresser, and he laughed.

"Ah, they didn't tell me you'd be such a cry baby. I thought you were a grownup."

I pounded on my dresser and deeply inhaled through my nose. He placed his front hoof on the back of my head and forced it down against the wood.

"That's right. You were worth every bit," he said as he slammed himself into me.

I couldn't begin to imagine what those words meant. Did he pay for this? Did my mom sell me to him? I couldn't think beneath the pain. I squeezed my eyes shut and forced myself to drown him out. I thought of Silver Spoon, and the day we first got to know one another. It was the happiest day of my life.

Silver Spoon stood at the edge of the dance floor. She looked unhappy, which didn't sit well with me on that particular night. Diamond was supposed to be her date, but she was off philandering with any colt or filly that would look her way. Silver still didn't like me very much, but I figured I'd try to cheer her up. I mean, I didn't really like her either, but it was just sad seeing her all dressed up and looking pretty all alone over there beneath the dim, colorful lights.

Diamond is such a bitch. I'd never consider doing anything nice for that little hayseed, but I could just tell that Silver was different. Maybe it was the innocent gleam in her eye, or the way her cute braids dangled. I bet if she wasn't so attached to Diamond, she'd be a really cool mare.

"Apple Bloom, I'm gonna go talk to Silver Spoon. She looks pretty lonely." I tapped her shoulder and nodded towards the filly.

"Yeah, so? She deserves it if ya ask me!" my charming friend shouted, apparently not so sympathetic.

"Hey come on. We're supposed to be learning about the magic of friendship and all that jazz. This is a perfect opportunity to be good friends." I nudged her with my elbow and raised my eyebrows.

"Whatever you say. If you wanna go make friends with that little donkey, be my guest. But don't come cryin' to me when she knocks you back on your flank with that sharp tongue of hers." Apple Bloom gave me a quick hug and trotted off to the punch bowl, glancing back with a crooked frown.

"Heh, yeah..." Suddenly I didn't feel so confident.

I gulped and fixed my bow tie, then headed across the room. As I approached her, she spotted me and threw on a look of disdain.

"What do you want, Scootaloo." Silver Spoon spat my name out with a hurtful sense of disgust.

"I uh... well..." I scratched my mane and glanced around the room.

"What is it? Spit it out." She crossed her hooves and the gems on her gown sparkled beneath the stage lights.

I looked her over and gulped again, she was beautiful. Her bright purple eyes matched mine, but held so much more beauty from behind her lustrous glasses.

"Nothing, you just... well you looked a little lonely, and I thought..." I could feel myself blushing under my hot cheeks, and turned to leave.

"You thought what? That I would like your company?" She chuckled, then began to laugh.

"I only hoped..." I muttered, as I started trotting away.

Silver lost her smile and let her ears droop, then sighed and shook her head.

"Wait!" she shouted, and I stopped walking.

"Yeah?" I asked, turning back around to face her.

"Heh, well. You're kind of right, maybe I am a little lonely..." She looked over to Diamond, who was slow-dancing with some colt from another school.

"Diamond is a crappy date," I scoffed.

Silver stood straight up and glared down at me. "She is not a crappy date! She's just... she's just trying to have fun."

"Sorry, jeez. I didn't mean anything by it, it just seems like you're not enjoying yourself over here. I wanted to try and help with that." I caught my breath, but my heart was still racing.

I was usually so cool about everything, I don't know what it was about her that got me so worked up.

"I'm fine on my own. But if you're feeling lonely too, then maybe we can share a dance until Diamond comes back." Silver stared into my eyes with a straight face.

I could feel my hooves getting sweaty, but I couldn't turn her down, not now.

"Yeah sure. Sounds like fun to me." I swallowed the lump in my throat and held up my front hooves, offering to take hers.

She straightened her silky white gown and stood upright. It felt like my heart stopped beating and I couldn't find a breath. Another song began to play and the ponies around us started dancing. She looked up at me expectantly, but I was frozen.

"I thought you wanted to dance... What in the hoof are you doing?!" She whispered loudly, ducking and hiding her face from our classmates.

"I do! I just," I choked and cringed.

I couldn't believe how big of an egghead I was being, Rainbow would have whooped my flank. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down, then I reached over and took her hooves in mine. We twirled around and joined the crowd.

She glared at me while we danced, and I continued trying to avoid eye contact. Then I stumbled.

"Come on Scootaloo, I thought you were supposed to be good. If I knew you were so clumsy, I wouldn't have let you do this."

I blushed deeply and felt myself begin to shake. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little nervous, I guess."

Silver glanced around and ensured nopony was watching, then stopped dancing. "Look, Scootaloo, you need to settle down before you humiliate both of us. Here, take your front hoof and wrap it around my waist, like this."

She took my foreleg and placed it on her hip, then reached her up around my neck.

"Now you lead, just step in time with the music and spin with me, and I'll match your movements." Silver sighed and waited for me to take the lead.

I looked down into her eyes and saw her staring at the floor. I came here to help her enjoy herself, but only made things worse with my sudden clumsy nervousness. I knew how to dance, and I've done it plenty of times before. I couldn't quite figure out why this mare had me tripping over myself like this, but somehow I liked it.

I took a deep breath and calmed myself, then started guiding her around the dance floor in graceful sweeps. Her eyes lit up, and we span around. Other ponies began to look at us while we danced in perfect synchronization, and Silver quickly took notice of the extra attention. Dancing was one of the few things I did well, and once I got into the flow of things, I was sure to impress my partner.

"That's not so hard, is it?" She winked while I held her up and twirled.

"Nah, I'm just a dope sometimes." I laughed a bit too loudly and managed to embarrass myself yet again.

She smirked and seemed to be lightening up. "Hey, I didn't realize you were such a good dancer, Scootaloo. No offense, but, how did you learn to move like this?"

I smiled, finally regaining some of my confidence. "I practiced a lot, and I learned how to balance my weight pretty well while learning tricks on my scooter. The two pretty much go hoof in hoof. Once I learned the steps, I had the ability to glide through them already down."

Silver looked up at me and broke a smile. "That's interesting. I've been attending dances and the like since I was still a blank flank. My father has a lot of dinner parties and charity events that he enjoys dragging me to, where dancing is usually commonplace."

"Ah, I've never been to anything other than a school dance." I laughed, and accidentally snorted as I did so. She didn't seem to mind my dorkiness too much, though it wasn't a characteristic I was used to exerting.

"Well you'd make for a much more enticing dance partner than I'm used to at those dull events. Maybe I could invite you to join me sometime."

"Heh, maybe." I looked down and away. I even felt out of place here, I couldn't imagine trying to blend in at a fancy charity party for high donors. "I'm not really cut out for that sort of thing, ya know?"

Silver shrugged and slowed down, then began swaying back and forth. "You're actually pretty cute, Scootaloo. I never realized you could be so friendly." She smiled softly and looked into my eyes, almost as if we were actually friends.

"Hey, I'm a real charmer once you get to know me." I smirked and let my pride shine.

"Are you? Well I'll have to see about that for myself." She wrapped her hoof around my hip and forcefully spun me around, then pulled me in tightly until our bodies were touching.

My pride was suddenly gone, and a large lump in my throat remained. "I... uh..."

She giggled and pushed her glasses up. "Charming."

It was almost irritating how easily she threw me off my game, like I'm just some young filly being teased by an older mare.

The song came to an end, and she let me fall to all fours. I cleared my throat and backed away. "Ya know, we can try that again if you want. I promise to be a little more charming this time."

She glanced over to Diamond, who was stumbling out the front door with two different colts by her side. "Yeah, I'd like that. You were terrible this time around."

"Well I need practice. I'm not used to dancing with such proper mares. You're pretty intimidating you know," I admitted. I'm not sure why I threw that out there, but thinking before speaking isn't something I do well under pressure.

"I'm intimidating? Because of my social status?" She looked down and away, her smile fading.

"Not that. It's because you're..." I cleared my throat. "You're really pretty."

She blinked several times, then scoffed. "So if you're after looks, why not go for Diamond Tiara? Everypony knows she's the prettiest mare in school."

"That's a matter of opinion. And in my opinion, you're the most beautiful mare I've ever seen." Suddenly it hit me, why I kept getting so nervous: I had a crush on her.

"Do you really mean that?" she asked, her eyes wide and her smile wider.

I could see in her eyes how important the answer to this question was to her, even if I meant absolutely nothing to her only half an hour ago. "I really do."

It didn't matter, I was infatuated and I hoped to spread it.

"So, should we dance again?" she asked as the next song began to play.

It was a softer beat, so slower dancing would be required, and that wasn't something I was so comfortable doing. Of course I said yes.

"Why not?" We each stood up again and our hooves interlocked.

She pressed herself against me and rested her chin on my shoulder. I could hardly breath while we slowly stepped in circles to the soft rhythm. I looked over her shoulder to see all the well-dressed ponies with their dance partners locked together in a romantic embrace. I knew I was out of place here, but it didn't really bother me until now.

"Silver, what are you doing with me? You know you could have anypony in here, right?" Shame sank into my stomach.

She shrugged and ran her hooves down my back. "You're the one who was nice enough to come talk to me when I was feeling alone. So thank you, Scootaloo."

I closed my eyes and nodded, then pressed my cheek up against hers. The song came to an end, and all the ponies dispersed to mingle and drink punch.

"Hey, you wanna get out of here?" She nodded towards the door.

My heart fell into my stomach and I winced. "Um, yeah, sure. Where do you wanna go?"

"I don't know, just anywhere we can be alone for a little while. We've never really gotten to know each other even though we've been in class together for like five years now. I just want to talk, you know?" She led the way towards the exit, her tail swaying back and forth noticeably beneath her silky gown.

"Right, sounds nice." I chased after her and tried to prepare myself for what might come next.

She pressed through the doors and cantered across the schoolyard. I spread my wings and matched her pace as she ran into a small wooded area.

"Where ya goin?" I called out, but she only glanced back and giggled.

Soon she twirled around and caught me in a hug, then pulled us both to the ground.

"This is far enough. I don't think anypony will be bothering us here." She smiled and placed a hoof over mine.

I let my mane fall over my face as I looked over her gorgeous body. Her eyes were reflecting the moonlight beneath her glasses, and her snowy-white mane was positively glowing in the night. I felt like I could just sit there and stare at her forever. I knew I was swooning, but I liked it.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I asked from behind my mane.

She lifted a hoof to brush it from my face, then rested it on my cheek. "I really wanted to say thank you for being a friend when I was in need. I love Diamond, but she's good at ditching me from time to time. It's just who she is, it doesn't really make her a bad pony or a bad friend. I'd be a bad friend if I didn't get it, or tried to be selfish and clingy about it."

I wanted to set her straight so badly, to tell her that Diamond was a worthless, horrible pony who didn't deserve one bit of her affection. I could feel my blood boiling, but I just took a deep breathed and calmed myself down.

"Enough about Diamond. I want to get to know you a little better, that was really the point of this, right?" I looked up and smiled, meeting her eyes.

She nodded and looked to the sky. "Right. Ask me anything, and I might answer you."

"Might?" I laughed. "Well, why did you decide to dance with me? I kind of thought you hated me, and that going over there was a waste of time to begin with."

"Honestly I thought you were the one who hated me. I figured you had just come over to mock me or something, like when we were younger... you and your friends were always the subject of our cruelty, I guess I was expecting revenge or something. I thought you wanted to, you know, kick me when I was down, maybe. I deserve that actually, after all I've done to you." Silver looked to the ground and blinked the tears from her eyes.

I lifted her chin with a hoof and looked into her watery eyes. "Wow, you're really beating yourself up over all that, aren't you..."

She shook her head and hugged me. "I guess I wish I was the one to go be nice to you first."

I grinned and pulled her close. "You being nice at all was a surprise, a good one. And Silver, you really made my night tonight. I'm glad we did what we did. Now don't cry, we're supposed to be getting to know each other better, remember?"

She laughed and tapped my wing. "You're right, and I believe it's my turn to ask you a question."

I leaned back and took her hooves in mine. "So ask away. I'm an open book."

"I can ask anything then, right?" She smiled and a hint of blush spread across her muzzle.

I nodded and she leaned in closer.

"Can I kiss you?"

My eyes shot open wide and I gulped. "Uh! Yeah, no, I don't see why not!"

She leaned in further until our muzzles were pressed against one another. I felt my body shudder, then she tilted her neck and brushed her muzzle across mine until our lips were nearly touching. I could feel her breath spilling across my cheek, and I closed my eyes. My heart exploded, and our lips connected. I could feel her hoof slowly sliding up my back and wrapping around my neck, and mine made its way into her mane. Our lips went from simply touching to interlocking, and she pressed harder. My heart was pumping bliss into my veins, and it coursed throughout my entire body. I'd never been happier in all my life.

I opened my eyes, and was staring up at the ceiling now alone in my bedroom. Tears poured down my cheeks, and I coughed. It was dark, and I was alone. The white stallion was nowhere to be seen.

It was then that I realized I had to leave home, and never look back.

"And I just stayed there, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about nothing. I don't know for how long, but it felt like hours. At some point a couple police ponies came into my room to talk to me. I guess my mom had called them, probably trying to make sure she didn't get blamed for anything. She came into my room with them, crying and acting worried or whatever. It was all bullshit, I know her better than that." Scootaloo shook her head and stared down at the table in front of her.

A pink earth pony wiped a tear from her eye and reached across the table to touch the young mare's hoof. "I'm so sorry Scootaloo. And thank you for talking to me about this, I know it must be... difficult."

"Heh, right..." Scootaloo scoffed, then fell silent.

"If there's anything at all on your mind that you want to talk about, feel free. I'm here to listen to anything and everything you'd like to share," she said, placing her quill to her notebook.

Both mares sat still for several long, drawn out moments. Scootaloo forced her forehead against the table, her eyes straining to focus on the wood grains and her hoof dangling limply. With a deep huff, she leaned up.

"So this is what you do now? Listen to messed up foals whine about their problems? Huh Cheerilee?"

The older mare grinned and let out a hot breath. "I'm a student counselor. And what I do is evaluate the psychological wellness of troubled youths."

"Oh, so that's why you abandoned me then? To become some kind of shrink? Awesome." Scootaloo pressed her hooves into her eyes and let her head fall to the table once again.

"Please Scootaloo, I didn't abandon you. I've always been there for you whenever I could be. Now this session is for you to talk about yourself, and I would really like to know what you've been up to for the past couple years." Cheerilee tapped the notebook and smiled down at her former student.

"So what, we can't talk about you for a while? What if you're what's on my mind?" The young pegasus smiled and tilted her head.

"Very well then, ask me anything you want to know. But I expect you to return the favor." The older mare winked and set her notebook down.

"Fine, tell me why you had to leave me behind when I needed you the most." Scootaloo sat straight up and stared into her eyes.

Cheerilee shook her head and fidgeted in her chair. "I didn't know... I mean, I didn't realize that you'd... What I'm trying to say is that I had no idea Rainbow Dash was going to leave so soon. I didn't expect things to go the way they did, or I'd have stayed. And that's saying a lot! I honestly, truly would have put my career on hold for you, Scootaloo. I know you don't think so right now, but I really care about you, as if you were my own daughter, or sister. You're a very special filly to me. In fact, you're the reason I decided to pursue counseling in the first place. My time spent with you, helping you through life's throes, really inspired me. I loved being there for you, and I always want to be there for you."

Scootaloo's eyes watered over as she watched her teacher's mouth moving. "So then... why didn't you write me a letter? Or visit? I didn't hear from you for over two years, and I missed you."

"I know, and I wish I had done things differently, but I honestly thought you were fine. Rainbow Dash told me that she was back in Ponyville for good, and I didn't think twice before taking that as my opportunity attain my Counselor's Degree. I wish I could go back in time and just put everything on hold, but what's done is done. If it's any consolation, I'm here for you right now, and I'll always be here for you whenever you need me." Cheerilee smiled softly as she reached across the table and placed her hoof over Scootaloo's.

The small orange pegasus stared at her teacher's hoof, then turned her own to cup it. "No no, don't think I'm forgiving you that easily. You have a lot of making up to do."

Cheerilee laughed and wiped another tear. "It's good to see you again, but not like this. I still need to ask you a few more questions. I'm told that I have to give a report to the police, and that requires me asking you a few more questions."

"Seriously?! Why didn't they just ask me themselves?!" Scootaloo smacked the table and shouted.

"I'm somepony you can trust, and that you're comfortable with. They feel you'll be the most open with me. Now a deal's a deal, so let me just get this over with and we can go back to just talking between the two of us. Now, your mom mentioned in her report that you had let a young white colt sneak into your room? And that this wasn't an uncommon occurrence?" Cheerilee asked, relifting her notebook and quill.

"Wait what?!" Scootaloo stood off her chair and smacked the table. "I never heard that. And that's a lie!"

"Okay. Settle down there. Tell me the truth then, Scootaloo. That's what this session is all about." Cheerilee eased her student down as her face fell into a worrisome gaze.

"I never let anypony into my room! Not even Apple Bloom goes in there. And this stallion was no young colt, he was huge! And there's another thing..." Scootaloo lowered her eyes and sighed. "He said that I was worth every bit."

Cheerilee narrowed her eyes and bit down on the end of the quill. "Do you have any idea what he could have meant by that?"

"Not sure, but it seems like he paid somepony to get into my room, or like my mom sold me to him in some way. Last week, on the same day that it happened, my mom was arguing with some little punk about money, so I was thinking that it might be connected or something. But she denies that anypony was at the house that day, and the police won't listen to me. I've pretty much given up, all I know for sure is that I'm never going back there..." Scootaloo looked up at Cheerilee, teary eyed and with a small grin.

"So how are things at the apple farm?"

"Fine I guess." The filly glanced away and tapped the table.

"Are you still... eh, partaking in the use of illegal substances?" Cheerilee asked as she drew circles and figure-eights on her notebook.

"Last week was the last time. I haven't really done much of anything since then. I did remember to write in my journal, but that's about it." Scootaloo glanced over to her saddlebag and raised an eyebrow.

Cheerilee smiled and trotted over to it. "Is that the one I bought you? I'm glad to see you're still using it."

"Actually that's a new one. The one you got me filled up a few months ago. I did a lot of writing after you left... a lot of writing."

"You filled that whole thing up in just over two years? There were at least five years worth of entries in it," Cheerilee pointed out as she lifted Scootaloo's saddle bag onto the table.

"Well some of my entries were pretty long, and well, they leaked onto other days' spots and stuff. I don't know, it is what it is," she explained.

"So tell me about the time you spent while I was away at school. I'm curious to know what all happened, I mean, it couldn't be all bad. Right?" Cheerilee asked as Scootaloo reached into her bag and lifted out two large journals.

"Here, go ahead and see for yourself. I wrote about every single day, even if nothing interesting at all happened. I had absolutely nothing better to do. I mean, between Apple Bloom and Silver Spoon, a sixteenth of my day was spent. So all I did was write about it..."

"Are you sure you want me to read this? It's your personal journal after all." Cheerilee slid the book across the table and scanned over the cover. Property of Scootaloo, Stay out or Rainbow Dash will kick your flank!

"Go for it. You're my shrink now, right? Maybe you can, you know, help me out with a few things. I could use some real relationship advice, I'll admit it. The details are in there. I guess I'll see you tomorrow then?" Scootaloo stood up and brushed herself off, and seconds later the school bell rang.

"Wow, I guess you're right. Times up already huh?" Cheerilee glanced to the clock behind her and placed Scootaloo's diary into her own saddlebag.

"Yup. See ya." The young pegasus rushed towards the door, turning back with a wide, beaming smile as she turned the knob.

"Hey Scootaloo, I just want to say that I'm really proud of you. You made huge progress today, telling me everything that happened like that. You never cease to amaze me. How about I treat you to dinner sometime? You know, to get you out of that barn for a little while." Cheerilee leaned over the table and fluttered her lashes.

"Yeah, happy to be here. And that'd be... cool, I guess. Sure. When?" Scootaloo blushed and took a step into the hallway.

"I'll get back to you on that. Now have fun, and don't forget to keep on writing in that journal. Remember, writing your feelings down can really help you see yourself more clearly." Cheerilee shooed her student away and locked her office door behind her.

She then closed the blinds on her door and retreated into her private office. She slumped down into her cushioned chair and let out a deep, overdrawn sigh as she tapped on her desk. Heavily dropping her saddlebag onto the floor next to her, she lifted Scootaloo's diary and dropped it onto the table.

... Rainbow Dash. Her nostrils flared at the sight of the name, and she took several deep breaths. As a deep sense of rage boiled in her stomach, she violently yanked open a drawer on her desk, pulling a cigarette from within. She struck a match and took a deep drag, puffing a plume of smoke into the air. Her hoof slowly stopped shaking, and she hung her head as the relaxation washed over her.

With another puff, she flipped open the diary. Entry: 1

_____________________________________________________________________________________

The Scootaloo

Diaries

______________________________________________________________________________________

Entry: Innocence

I dreamed about her again last night. It wasn't the same as when she visited me, and I can barely remember this. I wish I had started writing sooner, but there's nothing I can do about it now. I wonder if I'll ever see Princess Luna again. I hope I do, I bet she could offer some sort of advice or at least tell me that I'll be okay. It's really bugging me that I can't remember this dream when the time she came to me all those years ago is still such a vivid memory. I saw her, she smiled, it was dark, getting darker, but her eyes, I remember the way she looked at me. It was like-

"Scootaloo? What's up? Are you okay?" Silver Spoon trotted up to Scootaloo with lowered ears and peeked over her journal.

The pegasus snapped the book closed and smiled, glancing up to her silhouetted friend, the sun glaring behind her head. "You know, just writing some stuff down while I waited. I wanted to see you."

Silver Spoon tilted her head up as her father trotted past the two, stopping only to pat Scootaloo on the head before entering the large home.

The young pegasus shuddered and sat upright before she stuffed her journal into her saddle bag. "That was weird, no shooing me away? Huh, well yeah I'm fine. Why?"

Silver Spoon tentatively kicked at the ground with the tip of her hoof, rolling a small pebble back and forth. "I heard about what happened. I'm really sorry. I guess it makes sense why I haven't seen you in, like, a week."

Scootaloo stiffened her wings and stamped her hoof. "Who told you?!"

The young gray mare stepped back, lifting her foreleg defensively. "What? I don't know. Why does it matter? I guess Apple Bloom told me at the market. I didn't think it was that big of a deal, and I was kind of thinking of going too, just to have something to do all summer."

Scootaloo tilted her head and raised an eyebrow, then began to laugh. "What exactly did Apple Bloom say?"

"She said you got stuck going to summer school, and you're really upset about it. That's why I haven't seen... you... Right?" Silver Spoon circled around her friend and shrugged.

"Right, summer school. I was gonna tell you. Damn Apple Bloom running her mouth all the time. You now how she is. But yeah, that's where I just came from, actually." Scootaloo scratched the back of her mane and sighed.

"Wanna talk about this inside? It's pretty hot out here." Silver Spoon fanned herself with her hoof and nodded towards the door.

"Yeah, sure."

She winked and adjusted her glasses as she placed a hoof on her front door. Scootaloo stood still, her hooves shaking and her heart racing as her friend disappeared into the indoors. Her eyes lowered to the dirt beneath her, and she bit down on her tongue, snuffing out the urge to cry. She took a deep, calming breath, and slowly glanced upward to the building in front of her.

"Scootaloo?" Silver chirped from just inside. "You coming?"

The pegasus dragged a hoof across the ground, her heart skipping beats and her ears ringing. "Yeah. Just enjoying the nice day."

A smile spread across her face and she forced pep in her step as she trotted into her friend's home. Shutting the door behind herself, she sank into the familiar, cool air of the wealthy home. A large silver-coated stallion trotted up to her, tilting his head and examining her closely.

Scootaloo flinched and fluttered her wings. "Hello, Silver Dollar. Is something wrong?"

He placed a hoof under her chin and tilted her face up, his eyes scanning up and down neck and jaw. "You look good, despite all that's happened. Now go upstairs, my daughter is waiting."

Scootaloo scurried away as he turned and stepped towards the den. Chills shot up her spine with each creak of the stairs beneath her hooves. She squeezed her eyes shut and quickened her pace, shoving Silver Spoon's bedroom door open and rushing in.

Silver jumped and dropped her mane-brush as the door slammed open. "What's with you today?"

"Your dad was totally creeping me out just now. What's up with that?" Scootaloo steeled her nerves and breathed into her front hooves.

"Oh!" Silver perked her ears up. "That's right. He said that you got in a fight last week, and that if you got yourself, like, too beat up or whatever, then you wouldn't be able to go to Fillydelphia's First Annual Charity Auction that his company is hosting with me. Which reminds me, you wanna go to the charity auction with me? There'll be dancing, and plenty of entertainment.."

Scootaloo trotted up to Silver's large vanity mirror, her face void of emotion. She placed her front hooves on the dresser in front of it and gazed into her own eyes. Her heart pounded in her head as she watched her own deep purple eyes staring at her. Her hooves began to shake, and she ground her teeth and tears welled up in her eyes.

Silver Spoon placed a hoof on her friend's shoulder, resting her muzzle against her back. "Scootsy, what's wrong? Please tell me."

The pegasus' eyes fell down to the glossy wood grains of the polished dresser, and a deep, overdrawn breath fell from her lips as she stopped shaking. "I don't know. I thought I was okay... I thought..."

Silver Spoon pulled her friend away from the mirror and led her to the bed, setting her down. "What happened to you? I've never seen you like this before..."

Scootaloo shook her head and let her mane fall over her face. "Nah, it's nothing. My dad is coming home soon, and you know, I don't like him. That's why I left to go stay with Apple Bloom, if she didn't already tell you."

Silver wiggled herself onto the bed next to the pegasus and nudged her onto her back. She then lay down with her, her muzzle nuzzling the filly's chest. "She did tell me."

Scootaloo sank into the soft bedding, the thick comforter absorbing her body as she closed her eyes. She ran her hoof across Silver Spoon's braids as the young mare spilled her warm breath over her coat. A small grin stretched across Silver's face as she listened to her friend's heart beating, and she gently ran the tip of her hoof over the filly's chest in small circles, watching as it slowly rose and fell with each calming breath.

Wrapping both hooves around Silver Spoon, Scootaloo opened her eyes, her gaze fixed on the endless array of dust particles drifting through the beams of sun shining between deep blue curtains. With small gray hooves reaching behind her wings, she exhaled, serenity flooding her lungs.

"You know, speaking of things Apple Bloom says, I heard Diamond Tiara is moving away. What's up with that?" Scootaloo asked, a subtle smile blooming.

Silver flinched and squeezed the pegasus. "Yeah..."

"You cool with that?"

Silver Spoon huffed and buried her face against Scootaloo's chest. "I don't wanna talk about it... So are you gonna come with me to the thing or what?"

She nodded and ran her hooves up and down the filly's back. "Wouldn't miss it."

Silver Spoon leaned up and took her glasses off, reaching over Scootaloo and placing them on a small nightstand next to her bed. As she rested her head, her muzzle softly made its way beneath her friend's chin, warmly nuzzling her neck as she shut her eyes. "I'm tired."

"So sleep," Scootaloo whispered as she gently resumed stroking Silver's soft white braids.

The light shining through the closed curtains slowly turned a deep orange as the sun set, Silver Spoon's brilliant, glossy coat sparkling beneath it as she dozed off. Faint, muffled laughter permeated the walls from the streets below, and Scootaloo scoffed.

She tilted her head down and planted a kiss on the snoozing young mare's forehead, taking a moment to admire the warm, soothing scent of her beautiful white mane. "Sleep tight..."

***

Last weekend was the best weekend ever! I can't believe it! Rainbow Dash said that she'll be my big sister! My big sister. This is everything that I hoped for. I never thought it would happen, I mean, she's so cool, and I'm so... me. But none of that matters, she doesn't even care that I can't fly. She actually picked me up and flew me around! It was the greatest day of my life. I can't wait to see her agian, she said we could hang out by the pond tomorrow and "chill". I'm so excited I can't sleep! But I have to, I don't know what time she'll be expecting me, so I'll show up first thing in the morning and wait. That means sleep, now.

~Scootaloo, signing out!

Cheerilee turned the page and blinked the tears from her eyes. Snuffing out the smoldering butt of her cigarette, she took a moment to lean back in her office chair and reflect. Faint remnants of smoke trailed towards the ceiling as she stared unfocused into the space above. As the gray streams danced into their dissipation, Cheerilee leaned forward and pulled open the bottom drawer of her desk. She pulled out a small silver flask and slammed it on the hardwood surface in front of her, a mirthful frown slithering across her face.

With a deep, trembling breath, her eyes fell back over the diary, having reached approximately the middle. Pressing forward, she took another journey into the past; a journey into the life of a once innocent, loving filly.

***

Ding Ding Ding Ding

"Noooo... Five more..." I reached out to the object of incessant ringing and slapped it off the table it so irritatingly sat perched upon.

It fell to the floor, silencing itself, reading six o'clock...

I stretched my limbs and yawned, deciding I may as well get up now. I wiped the sleepiness from my eyes and leaned up, the sun speckling my room as it shone through the tree outside my window.

"The sun?!" I jumped out of bed and grabbed my clock. "Shoot!"

It was after eleven. I rushed to the mirror and wet my mane, smashing its messiness down into place and fixing it up as fast as I could. I splashed some water on my face and took a deep breath.

"Okay, stay cool. It's fine, just get there quick." I ran my hooves down my face and shook my head. "No problem."

I held my chin up and puffed my chest out, nothing could go wrong. Trotting towards my bedroom door, I stepped on the clock and stumbled into the wall, ramming my head into the doorknob. "Ouch!"

That was stupid. I'm stupid. I wobbled backwards, my front hooves holding my aching head as I fell onto my flank. What a way to start the day... Hopefully I'm getting the bad out of the way now, so all that's left is awesomeness.

I trotted into the front room opened the fridge, snatching up an apple and jumping for an ice-cube to rub on my head. Cool drops slid down my head and I fell against the white refrigerator door. Stupid clock... stupid door...

"You're up early." My mom trotted into the kitchen, wheezing and pointing on her chest as she lit up another cigarette.

I bit into my apple and smiled as I chewed. "Yup, I got a big day ahead of me. I'm gonna hang out with Rainbow Dash at the pond!"

She snorted and shook her head. "That mare's trouble, you hear? What would a grown mare want with a little foal like you anyway? Huh? You ever think of that?"

"She wants to be my sister, and she likes hanging out with me." I gritted my teeth and headed towards the door.

"Well be careful, I don't want her doing anything reckless with you, alright?"

"Come on, I'm almost eleven, I think I can handle myself..." I rolled my eyes and pushed through the front door.

My trusty scooter leaned against the side of the house with my helmet on the handle bars. I strapped up and hopped onto the scooter. The one thing my little wings are good for is propelling me at lightning speed down the streets of Ponyville while I'm on this thing. I flew into town, the cool air rushing through my mane as I zipped past the townsfolk and rounded corners. This is what it truly means to be a pegasus. I'm unstoppable when I'm flying like this, nopony can touch me or tell me what to do. This is freedom.

As I neared the other edge of town, a yellow pegasus fluttered out in my path and held her hooves up.

"Stoooooop!" she shouted, but I could barely make out the word as I slid to a screeching halt, dirt and dust clouding around me.

Inches away from her outstretched hooves, I stood still on the side of my scooter, then toppled over onto the dirt road. Despite the protection of my helmet, the bump on my head sent waves of pain coursing through every bone in my body.

"Owwee. What gives! Fluttershy?!"

"Oh... my... I'm so sorry, but I couldn't have you running over these tiny baby ducklings, now could I?" Behind her a large duck led its line of ducklings across the road.

"Are you kidding me?!" I jumped up and brushed myself off, the dirt still clinging to my coat while Fluttershy bit her lip and teared up.

I shook my head and continued down the road. I really can't stand her, she is the worst pegasus ever. She can fly, but chooses not to! What's up with that?! I'd give anything to be able to fly. And why is she so timid and scared of everything stupid little thing. If I was her, I'd fly everywhere, everyday instead of just fluttering around like a scared chicken.

She makes me so angry, I hate being around her. Whatever, it doesn't matter because today is going to be awesome as soon as I meet up with Rainbow Dash. Nothing's gonna ruin that.

So I shook off the annoying pegasus and hurried down the road towards the pond. As I reached the top of the hill, the water came into view, and sure enough Rainbow Dash was already there. She was lying stretched out on a beech chair with some really cool sunglasses on, her sky-blue coat gleaming in the sunlight. She's so... cool.

I rolled down the hill and slid to a smooth stop near the shore. I tossed my helmet down and trotted up to her, and she leaned up and lifted her shades.

"Hey kiddo. 'Bout time you showed up." She grinned nodded towards me. "Why do you look like you just got dragged around in the dirt? And why is there a huge bump on your head?"

I brushed my mane over my forehead and blushed. "Oh that? That's nothing, I just... slipped."

I wanted to slap myself. So uncool...

"Right... so how's it goin', Li'l Sis? Heh, doesn't really roll off the tongue. I guess I'm not used to this whole thing yet, you know?"

"I know. It's okay though, because we'll get used to it soon right?" I gave a reassuring smile and trotted up to her, holding my hooves out.

She leaned over her chair and grabbed me, pulling me into a hug. I lost my breath, and my limbs reacted on their own, wrapping themselves around her as tightly as they could. Before I closed my eyes I caught a glimpse of a few birds flying overhead, and I smiled wider. Her gorgeous rainbow mane fell across my cheek while buried myself against her, and I swear it was the best hug anypony had ever received. Ever.

"Scoots? Um..." She tapped my shoulder but I couldn't let her go.

After several long, enjoyable moments, she stood up with me still clinging to her and shook me off. "So now that you're here, what should we do?"

I lay flat on my back with the wind knocked out of me, and shrugged.

"Well the pond is turning out to be unusually boring. I usually like just relaxing in the sun, but today I'm in the mood for something a little more... exciting." She grinned and stood over me.

Catching my breath, I nodded rapidly. "Exciting sounds fun. What should we do?"

"I dunno, wanna fly around and do some tricks?" She jumped up into the air and hovered just above me.

"Uh..." My ears flattened and I choked up.

She gulped and dove down next to me. "What's the matter, scared?"

Before I could respond, she picked me up and jumped into the air. We accelerated into the sky and I spread my wings and held my forelegs out while she carried me higher and higher. The air grew colder and my ears popped as we soared above the clouds. Then, we began to slow down, and Rainbow tilted backwards until we were facing the ground and gaining speed once again. I felt my heart sink into my stomach as we raced downwards, and I could hardly breath as we plummeted straight towards the center of the pond.

I squeezed my eyes shut and shielded my face with my hooves as we reached the surface. Suddenly, I felt a sharp turn as we pulled back towards the sky. When I opened my eyes, we were facing a big group of clouds in the distance. My racing heart began to slow down as we leveled out, and I took a deep breath, my hooves dangling over the treetops.

I gulped and tilted my head as we flew over and across Ponyville. "Where are we going?"

Rainbow lifted me over her head and sat me on her back as she flew. I wrapped my hooves around her chest and held on tightly as she picked up speed, squinting my eyes when the sun appeared from behind the mass of clouds.

She glanced back at me and smiled. "I have somewhere to go later, but I thought you might like to visit Cloudsdale with me."

I just nodded and hugged onto her as we flew into the sky. Rainbow picked up speed and flew higher. I spread my wings and felt the cold air rushing beneath them and through my mane. I relaxed my body and lightly fluffed my wings back down, and with my eyes closed I savored every moment of the flight, from her flapping wings brushing against my sides, to her warm back beneath my chest, everything felt perfect.

I couldn't help but be reminded of when she held up me and flew me through the air for the first time. I felt so free, with the wind beneath my wings and my face to the sky. For the first time in my life, I knew what it felt like to be a pegasus, to truly be a pegasus. To truly be myself, at least, the version of myself I wanted to be.

I looked down over her shoulder at the cloud-tops that seemed to be drifting miles beneath us. The trees began to look like broccoli and the roads like cracks in the ground. A loud roaring sound began to ring in my ears, and I looked up. There were huge rainbow waterfalls tumbling from the sky into a giant lake beneath us, and buildings spiraling high into the sky.

"This place is amazing!" I leaned up and watched the majestic city passing by as we flew forward.

"You like it?" Rainbow Dash spread her wings wide and slowly skidded across the the soft cloud surface.

As she lowered herself, I hopped off her back and trotted around. The clouds felt weird beneath my hooves, like I was gonna sink right through them at any moment, but I just didn't for whatever reason.

"Yeah, I love it. I... I've always wondered what it's like up here.... but..." I stared off at the distant buildings, a giant factory with puffs of black clouds escaping its vents, a huge, round stadium with ponies cheering from within.

She patted me on the head and nudged me down a flattened pathway. "Heh, well focus. I brought you here for a reason."

I looked down the path and spotted an obstacle course of some kind, or something. "What's this?"

"This is where I learned to fly when I was a filly. I thought you'd like to check it out." Rainbow nodded with a smile and trotted backwards up to the course.

I slowly stepped towards her and gulped as I looked over the edge. There were round clouds and rings to fly through, but at least there was a wide floor at the bottom. "I don't know Dash, this looks pretty... advanced."

"You don't become the fastest, greatest flyer in all of Equestria by taking baby steps. Come on, worst case scenario you'll just take a dive onto the soft clouds down there. Give it a shot, and just remember the first rule of flying!"

"The first rule of flying?"

Her grin fell into a cold, adamant stare, and she puffed her chest out. "Always expect the unexpected!"

I flinched and stepped back. "Okay? What are the other rules?"

"Just keep that in mind, and you'll be fine for now." She smiled down at me and nudged me to the edge.

I looked back up into her wide, encouraging eyes, and I knew I couldn't disappoint her... not now. "Alright. I got this."

I took a step back and spread my wings, the thought of flying through this course and impressing her fueling my courage. I galloped to the edge and jumped! My wings flapped as hard as they could, but I couldn't gain any air. I just slowly fluttered to the bottom, but it was exhausting to even do that much. Sweat dripped down my forehead and I struggled to catch my breath.

Rainbow fluttered down by my side and helped me up. She glanced over her shoulder and scratched her mane, and I could tell she was ashamed of me. "Hey, how about we take a break from this. You can come with me to my hangout spot."

I nodded and folded my wobbly wings back down, glad to be off the topic of me flying. "Your hangout spot?"

"Yeah you know... hangout spot. Like a spot to go hang out." She shook her head and rolled her eyes, as if she were being forced to explain the most obvious thing in the world.

"I know what you mean, but I was wondering where it is."

"Right over there." She pointed to a dark gray cloud building near the edge of the city.

I trotted behind her as she led the way. Her awesome cutie mark caught my eye as she went, and couldn't stop staring. It was so cool, and I couldn't wait for mine to appear.

"You like that huh?"

I squeaked and stumbled backwards onto my flank.

"It is a pretty fine example of a cutie mark if I do say so myself." Rainbow stopped and slowly waved her flank from side to side.

"Yeah... I hope mine is that cool." I gulped and tried to force myself to look away.

"Everypony hopes that. You're a cool kid though, so I bet your cutie mark will be just as cool." She nodded and kept trotting forward, approaching the building's front door.

We walked into the dark cloud and she led me down a long hallway, thunder rumbling in the distance. I could feel my fur standing on my spine, but, I didn't feel scared. Suddenly a bright flash appeared next to us, followed by a boom and deep, loud roaring thunder. I gulped and scratched my head.

"So uh... what exactly is this place again?"

"Heh, it's a little creepy isn't it. This is Thunder Head, and it's only the coolest chillout spot in all of Cloudsdale."

I wasn't sure what was going on, but I could hear music as we approached the end of the hallway. At the entrance to a huge room stood a big, mean looking stallion, who stared down at me like he wanted to kill me.

"Whose da kid..." he squinted his eyes and looked me over.

"She's my sister Chubs. She's cool." Rainbow Dash rubbed my mane and smiled.

"Oh really? I didn't know you had a sister. Go on in." Chubs unlatched a velvet rope and signaled us through.

We headed through into a dark room. There were glowing pictures of lightning and ponies around the walls, and dim lights overhead.

"In like an hour or so this place will really start filling up. It gets pretty crazy sometimes, like, on weekends and stuff," Rainbow Dash explained as she led me to a group of ponies dancing on a shiny square floor.

"Come on kiddo. Let's dance." Rainbow let go of my hoof and walked backwards onto the dance floor.

She twirled around, pumping her shoulders and kicking at the ground to the beat of the fast paced, heavy song. I couldn't help but tap my hoof as I listened, but I didn't feel like dancing in front of all those strangers. Rainbow Dash kept at it, though, and she closed her eyes while she got even more into it. The other ponies moved away and watched her using her wings to propel her abrupt spins as she jerked her hips and whipped her mane.

Different colored lights flashed overhead and she slowed down as the music faded out. She stretched her hooves and smiled at all the other ponies, who looked up at her in awe.

"Hey kid. Why you standing out here by yourself. Come on in, it's fun!" Another song started up and she dragged me onto the center of the dance floor.

"Alright... I guess I'm just a little nervous. Heh..." I gulped and the base boomed along with more flashes of lightning.

"It'll pass. Just cut loose and be yourself."

There were some fast, light drums and robotic sounding electronic noises, but it was a nice beat overall. I nodded and started tapping my hoof. She smiled down at me with, her eyes gleaming. I could almost feel her pride as she watched me. All I ever wanted was to make her proud, and this was my chance.

I tapped my hoof to the beat, and as it grew louder and more intense, I started stomping. I just closed my eyes and let myself go, like she said to. I felt my shoulders and hips sharply swaying from side to side as I stepped in tune to the thumping rhythm. I looked around at all the other ponies dancing, and couldn't help but notice there were just jumping around randomly, off beat and unsynchronized. I shook it off and kept at it. Rainbow Dash was a much better dancer than them, and I had to be on her level.

She stood next to me and started copying my movements. "Hey Scoots, you're pretty good at this. Are you just improvising right now? Because that's awesome!"

My heart bursting with pride, I nodded. Long, drawn out synths echoed through the club and the beat slowed down. I closed my eyes again and let my body move itself to the gentle, yet heavy sounds. I felt a little dizzy, and every inch of my body was tingling as I swayed back and forth between steps. I could feel Rainbow Dash next to me, and felt free to do whatever I wanted.

For the first time in my life, I was among other pegasi, I was among my peers and I was fitting in just fine. For the first time, I felt like I was exactly who I wanted to be, and it was all thanks to her.

The music faded out, and another song began with some mare singing to something generic sounding. I stepped back, feeling a little light headed and out of breath.

"Wow, you're something else. You've got to come hang out with me more often Scootaloo." Rainbow patted my mane down and trotted past me.

I followed her to a table and she bought us some drinks. I got some applejuice, and I'm not sure what she got, but it looked good and colorful. I wasn't about to ask and look like a dork, but I have a good guess as to what it was.

***

We spent who knows how long just sitting there and talking about random stuff. Rainbow Dash once again gave me the best day of my life. I love her more than I could ever love a sister, and her becoming my new sister is the best thing that ever happened to me. I hope this lasts forever.

~Scootaloo, signing out

Cheerilee marked her spot in the diary before yawning and stretching out. She closed it and stuffed it into a drawer, glancing to the clock behind her. It was dark outside, and crickets chirped in the silent night. With a quick twist to crack her back, the mare flipped the lights off and locked her office doors. She headed out into the night and began the short journey home, a single thought lingering in the back of her mind.

She looked up to the sky and whispered, "Rainbow Dash... what happened to you..."

Scootaloo lay silent in the dark as she stroked her dear friend's brilliant white braids.

"What would I do without you..." she whispered. "You and Apple Bloom..."

Entry: Torn in Two

It seems that no matter how bad things get, life will always have these moments to remind you that it's worth living. Seeing Silver like this makes me feel strange, and I like it a lot, even though a younger version of myself would probably just feel incredibly bored. It makes me wonder on what I missed out on when I was younger. I wish I had known to savor all the good things in life the way I do now. It's funny to think about how quickly everything went from so great to so bad, and I can't help but wonder exactly what happened and why. Maybe I'm being punished for being so full of myself, or maybe I'm just bad luck. All I know for sure is that without Silver Spoon and Apple Bloom to take care of me, I'd be lost...

Scootaloo lay perfectly still with her eyes closed, her mind running a mile a minute while Silver Spoon peacefully rested on her chest, fast asleep. The young pegasus gently poked her friend's side and watched carefully for a reaction. She poked her again, slightly harder, and the filly began to stir.

With a huge yawn, Silver Spoon stretched her legs and opened her eyes. "Hmm," she smiled and nuzzled her friend. "Sleep well?"

"Well enough." Scootaloo shrugged and sat up.

"That's good, because we've got a big day tomorrow. Think you'll be able to get out of Summer School?" Silver asked, leaning over and reaching for her glasses.

Scootaloo scoffed and rolled her eyes. "You're joking, right? Of course I can, Cheerilee's cool with me so it shouldn't be a problem. I'll just swing by and tell her what's going on in the morning."

"Great. So I was wondering, who else is in Summer School this year? I might not want to go depending on who's there," Silver Spoon asked.

Scootaloo tilted her head and thought. "Heh... I don't really know."

Silver frowned and raised an eyebrow. "How do you not know? Weren't you just there a few hours ago?"

"Well yeah but I didn't really pay attention. I mostly just sat there with my head on my desk until it was about time to leave," Scootaloo explained.

"You better not get held back a year... My dad will never let you hang out with me again if that happens, you know that."

Scootaloo smiled confidently and puffed out her chest. "Come on, you really think I'd fail? I already passed the grade just fine, Cheerilee just wants me to attend summer classes because she thinks I need more social interactions while school's out, plus I think she knows about what me and Apple Bloom do in the orchard, so... You know how she is."

Silver looked down and lowered her ears. "I thought you said you stopped doing that."

"I did stop. I just..." Scootaloo sighed and buried her face in her hooves. "I'm sorry, I just got really stressed out when I found out my dad was coming home, and Apple Bloom was quick to suggest it. I promise that was the last time though, and honestly, laying in bed with you makes me feel a million times better than smoking anyway."

Silver cracked a smile and leaned into her friend. "Thank you, Scootsy. You know you're always welcome in my bedroom."

The pegasus blushed and nodded. "If only your dad felt the same."

"You want to be welcome in my dad's bedroom?" Silver smirked and widened an eye.

Scootaloo squeezed her eyes shut and rapidly shook her head back and forth. "Gross, Silver Spoon."

The two giggled, and Silver reached up to grab her friend's hoof. "I know. In all seriousness, I wish he'd let you over more often. You're, like, the highlight of my day every time you come over. I love having you around."

"I love being around... but..."

"But what?" Silver lowered her eyebrows and frowned, concerned.

"Well, if what you said is true, then why do you always send me away when Diamond is around?" Scootaloo gulped and stared at the floor.

"Scootaloo..." Silver bit her lip and shook her head. "Forget about all of that, because it doesn't matter anymore. She's leaving, and, if you want, I can be..."

The young pegasus looked up into her friend's deep purple eyes, and she shrugged.

Silver cleared her throat and placed a hoof on Scootaloo's lower leg. "I can be all yours, if you want."

A bittersweet pain flooded Scootaloo's chest as she took in what her friend had said. "I think I've been dying to hear you say that for a very long time now. I'm so sick of living in Diamond Tiara's shadow, because I like you a lot, but I hate her. I hate everything about her, especially the way she treats you. Even though the thought of her leaving makes me happy, the thought of it hurting you makes me want her to stay. I don't know how I feel... But I know I don't want to simply be her replacement."

Silver Spoon wore a crooked frown as she listened. "Old habits die hard, right? Diamond was just a bad habit that I could never break on my own. Maybe I'm just weak-minded, but her leaving to Manehatten is the push I need to make things right between you and me."

"Make things right?"

"I want you to be with me. I want to tell Diamond that she was wrong about you, and you've been a better friend to me than she has by far. I don't care what my dad says or thinks, because being with you is what makes me happy. So, will you?" Silver Spoon smiled widely with starry eyes.

Scootaloo looked her friend in the eye, then her gaze slowly trailed down the young mare's neck and chest, sliding further to her delicate, slender body. "Yeah let's do this."

Silver Spoon squeaked in delight before jumping across the bed and tackling her new marefriend with a painfully loving embrace. "Stay the night with me?"

Scootaloo gulped from beneath the affectionate gray filly and blinked. "What? Won't your dad-"

"Shh! Forget my dad. Do you want to stay the night with me?" Silver repeated.

Scootaloo fought back blush as the warmth from the young mare above her seeped into her coat. Then she nodded.

"Good..."

Silver Spoon took her glasses off and tossed them onto the floor. She then leaned down until her muzzle was brushed up against Scootaloo's, and she took a deep breath. The pegasus spread her wings and reached around her friend, running her hooves down her sides then up her back, pulling her down tightly.

Their lips touched, and Scootaloo's heart pounded in her chest. She parted her lips as Silver's tongue slipped past, and felt a small gray hoof trailing down her stomach, making its way towards her thighs. Scootaloo's pulse quickened and she squeezed her legs shut along with her eyes. Her breaths grew shorter and her stomach filled with sickening pains of fear and nervousness.

Silver leaned up and winced. "Is something wrong?"

Scootaloo huffed and nudged her friend off of her. "I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

"Wait. Why?! Did I do something?" Silver's lip quivered and she reached out to the pegasus.

Scootaloo shook her head as she grabbed her saddlebag and opened the bedroom window, leaping out and fluttering to the street beneath it. As she cantered down the road, she began to choke on the tears she had been holding back. She grabbed onto her aching stomach and curled up against a tree, sobbing and sniffling.

With tears dripping down her cheeks, she pulled her journal from her bag and began to write.

It seems that no matter how good things get, life will always have these moments to remind you that it just isn't worth living...

Apple Bloom sat on her bed against the wall with a pencil in her mouth. She doodled on a blank page of her notebook, drawing hearts and sketching Babs' name over and over. She sighed longingly and glanced to a photo of her cousin sitting at the edge of her dresser.

She stood off her bed and trotted around her room, admiring the various paintings lining the wall. She stopped at her favorite piece, the painting she was most proud of. In the image, Babs Seed and Apple Bloom stood close, each with a foreleg around the other's neck. The sun sat behind them, casting a orange glow over the orchard trees.

Apple Bloom put on a smug grin and glanced back at her own cutie mark. It was a small paintbrush leaning against a half-painted rainbow apple. She yawned and headed back to bed, stopping to rub her hoof across the custom cut and polished headboard. The tip of her small yellow hoof stopped at a set of tally marks gashed into it near the base. A grin stretched across her face, and she began to miss her cousin more than ever.

"Only four?" she whispered, then closed her eyes and pressed her face into the pillow, a familiar Manehatten scent trapped within.

She pictured the young mare, her voice and accent ringing in her ears. With another deep inhale from her pillow, she imagined Babs coming back to see her, and what they would do. She shuddered as she ran a hoof down her stomach and pressed it between her legs.

"Babs..." she whispered as she bit down on her pillow, squeezing her eyes tightly shut.

Tap Tap

Apple Bloom froze and gulped.

Tap

With a deep huff, she rolled her eyes and hopped off the bed, trotting up to the window. Scootaloo stood outside, preparing to toss another pebble.

"What do you need?" Apple Bloom quietly called out.

"I wanna talk to you."

"Shh!" The young earth pony flattened her ears and ducked. "Hold on..."

She closed the window and silently tiptoed out into the hallway of the farmhouse, careful not to wake Applejack who was fast asleep in the room across from hers. Once downstairs, she sighed and wiped her brow before trotting outside.

"Hey, if we wake AJ up, she's gonna be awful mad at us. She's been extra stressed about something lately, and she's real snappy about it," Apple Bloom explained.

Scootaloo stayed staring at the ground and shrugged. "Sorry. I just needed to talk."

"Alright, come with me then." The red-maned filly trotted up to the barn doors and very carefully opened them up.

Scootaloo took a deep breath and wiped the moisture from her tired eyes. She followed her friend into the barn and leaned into a stack of hay bales. Apple Bloom ran her front hooves through her mane and groaned.

"It's been a long day Scoots... So anyway, what's goin' on?" Apple Bloom asked just before letting a deep, drawn out yawn escape.

The little pegasus shook her head and slumped down to the dirt beneath her. "So I found out that you've been talking to Silver Spoon. Are there any other lies I should know about?"

Apple Bloom chuckled and shrugged. "Depends on what you already know."

"I'm stuck in summer school, and that's why I've been missing for a week." Scootaloo raised an eyebrow and looked the earth pony in the eye.

"Well shoot! What was I supposed to say to her? She was drillin' me for answers, and I don't know, it just slipped out. I was tryin' to cover for ya, you know, 'cause you wanted privacy and whatnot." Apple Bloom took a deep breath and began to rub her temples.

"Well you also told her I was staying with you..." Scootaloo pointed out.

"Yeah, but that was like three days later. I'm sorry if you feel like I crossed some line somehow, I just wanted to help."

Scootaloo trotted up to her friend and lowered her hooves. "I'm sorry, I'm not mad at you. I've just had a pretty crappy day myself. The real reason I woke you up is because... well..."

Apple Bloom tilted her head and placed a hoof under the pegasus' chin. "Hmm?"

"I guess I just don't wanna sleep alone tonight, or I won't sleep at all."

The earth pony nodded and smiled. "Wait here, I'll be right back."

Scootaloo sat back down as her friend trotted back through the barn doors and rounded the corner. She took several deep breaths and bit down on the tip of her hoof. A rock sat in her heart while she rocked herself back and forth. Just stay calm... you're okay... Breath...

The barn door creaked and startled her as Apple Bloom came trotting back in with an old blanked wrapped around a couple of pillows. She tossed them onto the dirt and spread the blanket out.

"I figure the summer air is plenty warm and we don't need to cover up. Plus, if I get cold, you'll be here to keep me warm, right?" Apple Bloom winked and giggled as she fluffed the pillows.

Scootaloo snapped her teeth and scoffed, but Apple Bloom didn't notice. "Maybe."

"What, you gonna make me beg?" The earth pony stretched herself out on the blanket and fluttered her eyelashes.

"I was thinking we could just... cuddle." Scootaloo climbed onto the blanket and tentatively curled up next to her friend.

Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow as the usually energetic and devious pegasus quietly and apathetically rested. "So, what happened to you? I figured you'd wanna like, you know... I guess you're not quite yourself. I heard you got into a fight..."

Scootaloo bit down on her lip and fought back tears. "Will you please just hug me and be quiet..."

Apple Bloom cringed and reluctantly agreed. She leaned over and wrapped a foreleg around the sulking filly's chest. With another deep breath, she closed her eyes and nuzzled her friend's neck and ear. "I love you, Scootaloo."

"Do you?" Scootaloo asked, her eyes partially open and staring into the darkness at the other end of the barn.

"Of course I do... Haven't I proved it yet?" Apple Bloom fidgeted against the young mare's wings.

"So what are you saying exactly? You mean you love me because I'm your best friend? Or because we've known each other for so long? Or what?!" Scootaloo abruptly turned to face her friend with wide, concerned eyes.

"I don't know, Scootaloo. I wish I had a simple answer, but I just don't know how I feel about you. I don't even know what kind of relationship we have. If we're best friends, then what kinda friends are we? I don't think ponies who are just friends do the things that we do together. I have eleven tally marks behind my headboard with your name on 'em. Why do I have those?! It ain't normal, and it's drivin' me nuts." Apple Bloom flopped over onto her back and pressed her hooves into her eyes.

"You keep tally marks? So... you have more than just mine on there?" Scootaloo asked, a jealous pit in her stomach.

Apple Bloom turned red and huffed. "Really? I'm over hear pourin' my guts out to you, and you wanna get jealous? Come on now Scoots, you ain't got no room to talk."

Scootaloo smiled and began to giggle. "Come on now AB, you're the one that ain't got no room... no room left on your head board for tallies that is. Slut."

The earth pony scoffed and shook her head. "And there she is. I was beginning to worry I'd never see the real you again."

Scootaloo choked down the pain in her chest and smiled. "I'm sorry. I can't resist burning you no matter how depressed I am. Seriously though... how many tallies do you have?"

"Scootaloo, that is none of your business. You don't see me asking you about all the random ponies you've been with. Like, dozens, right? Should I list the ones I know about?" Apple Bloom looked up and began silently counting.

"What?! Dozens? And you're always asking about my personal life, especially when it comes to Silver Spoon, who is the only pony other than you I've ever been with! What's this list you claim to know about?" Scootaloo shouted.

"What about Babs... did you two ever do anything?" Apple Bloom looked into Scootaloo's eyes, carefully watching and waiting to detect a lie.

"Nope. I honestly don't even really like her at all." Scootaloo held her gaze and a straight face as she answered.

Apple Bloom smiled and let out a sigh of relief. "So you've really just been with me and Silver?"

"Yup. What about you?" Scootaloo hesitantly asked, fearing the answer.

"Well, there's you... and one other pony." The earth pony grinned and sat back down.

"Who?" Scootaloo asked as she knelt down and made herself comfortable.

"Nope. Not telling... You'll find out soon enough, Scoots." Apple Bloom reached forward and gently pulled on the filly's back, urging her to lay down.

"So how many tallies does this mystery pony have?" Scootaloo rolled onto her side and wrapped her front hooves around the earth pony, pulling her close.

"Four."

Scootaloo winced and swallowed her jealousy. "Will this pony be getting any more?"

"Hopefully."

"What?!" the young pegasus shouted. "What's that supposed to mean? Hopefully."

Apple Bloom nuzzled her angry friend's chest and giggled. "It means exactly what I just said, silly. I hope that in the future, I get to add more tallies for her. Don't you want to be with Silver Spoon again sometime too?"

Scootaloo grimaced and looked away. "I could have been tonight, but I ran away from her for some reason, and I just wanted to come see you instead."

Apple Bloom lowered her eyes and tucked her legs in as she lay on the hard ground with her closest friend. "You did? Why?"

The pegasus stroked the filly's soft red mane and scooted down to face her. "I can't explain why we do the things we do to and with each other..."

"Heh. You're right about that at least." Apple Bloom smiled and looked into Scootaloo's eyes. "So... what should we do now? Sleep?"

"You wanna sleep?" Scootaloo asked, a knot in her throat.

Apple Bloom leaned forward and planted a kiss on the pegasus' muzzle. She placed her hoof on her friend's hip and ran it down her flank and thigh. Scootaloo shuddered beneath its soft touch and bit her lip.

"Apple Bloom..."

"Shh." The young earth pony kissed her friend, effectively silencing her.

Scootaloo closed her eyes and kissed back, tingles trailing down her neck and spine. She parted her lips and pulled the young mare on top, her heart beginning to race.

Apple Bloom pinned her friends forelegs down and bit on her ear, playfully nibbling down its length to her cheek.

Scootaloo huffed and took sever deep breaths, her heart kicking at her rib-cage. "I'll do whatever you want..."

"Huh?" Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow and glanced down at her friend, who had her eyes squeezed tightly shut and seemed to be nearly hyperventilating. "Y'alright Scoots?"

The small orange pegasus nodded and slowly opened her eyes, her cheeks hot and turning red. "Yeah, I think so. Just be gentle okay? And take your time..."

Apple Bloom placed her hoof on Scootaloo's cheek, then leaned down with a soft kiss. "Okay... Who needs sleep anyway? Am I right?"

"Hm. Right." The pegasus relaxed her nerves and slipped into the moment, closing her eyes and letting her friend's warmth envelope her entire body.

"Crap..." Apple Bloom turned away and smacked her forehead with a hoof. "I almost forgot that I need to wake up pretty early."

"You're joking..." Scootaloo huffed and let her hooves fall limp. "Whatever, I have stuff to do tomorrow too."

"Sorry Scootaloo, it's just 'cause I gotta help AJ load up some hay bales. It's this month's secret crop harvest hidden inside the bottom layer of hay bales going to Manehatten, and if my sister finds me sleepin' late out here with you, well... It won't be pretty," Apple Bloom explained.

"It's fine. Let's just get some sleep, and we'll say you owe me one." The pegasus winked and rolled over on her side, a deep sigh of relief escaping her lungs.

"Fair enough." Apple Bloom winked and kissed her friend on the cheek. "So what are you doing tomorrow anyway?"

"Not much, really. I have to talk to Cheerilee in the morning because I'm going to some charity auction thing with Silver Spoon in Manehatten, so I'll be gone all weekend probably," Scootaloo explained as she yawned and closed her eyes.

"Whoa whoa whoa, what?! You're going to Manehatten too?! You gotta go see Babs while you're there, tell her I miss her and... hold on, I'll give you a letter to deliver before you leave in the morning. Dang it, I wish my stubborn sister would let me go too... I'll miss you, Scootaloo." Apple Bloom sighed and tightly hugged her friend from behind.

"That's actually the only reason I considered not going... I'll miss you too."

"Well don't worry about me too much, you just focus on having a good time. Somethin' tells me you could really use it right about now. Anyway, we really should get to sleep now... Night Scoots." The small yellow earth pony yawned and nuzzled Scootaloo's back.

"Goodnight, AB."

***

Cheerilee yawned and stretched her legs out before drearily kicking the sheets off of herself. Her heavy eyes inched open and she climbed out of bed. As she trudged towards the shower, she thought of Scootaloo. Unanswered questions and curiosity sat heavily on her shoulders, and she began to pick up her pace as she walked through her daily morning routines, if only to hurry back to her office where the diaries sat.

Hot steamy water poured over her back while she lathered herself up, suds pouring through her mane and down her sides. She quickly washed herself off and hopped out of the shower, tossing a towel over her mane as she headed back into her bedroom. Shaking herself dry, she brushed her curly mane to perfection and threw her saddlebag over her shoulder before she headed out the front door.

Cheerilee wore a bright smile as she pranced down the sidewalk. A purple unicorn was crossing her path as she headed towards the school.

Cheerilee trotted up to her and eyed her stack of books and brown paper bag floating in her magical purple aura. "Hello Twilight Sparkle. How are you on this fine summer morning?"

"Oh hi. I'm doing just fine, how about you?" Twilight blushed and quickly levitated the bag behind her back.

"I'm great," Cheerilee said as she lifted her head to peek at the bag. "What do you have there? If you don't mind me asking."

"Oh this? Nothing. It's nothing, just uhm, just something for later." Twilight put on a goofy smile and lightly kicked at the ground. "Something to celebrate with."

"Oh, what's the occasion?" Cheerilee smiled and stepped closer.

Twilight folded the top of the bag closed and stepped back. "Rainbow Dash is coming to visit us this weekend, so I thought I'd pick something up for tonight. It's stupid, really."

Cheerilee frowned and placed a hoof to her chin. "That's a bottle of liquor, right? It's really none of my business... I'm late. I should be going."

"You should swing by the library later. Pinkie Pie is going all out this time. I think she misses Rainbow more than anypony." Twilight smiled and looked up at the clouds.

Cheerilee lowered her ears and shook her head. "I doubt that... Well I hope you all have a wonderful time, and I just might take you up on that offer. Will you do me a favor though? I think it would really mean a lot to Scootaloo to see Rainbow Dash before she leaves again for who knows how long, but I don't want her to see her role model drunk or getting... laid, or whatever she does these days."

Twilight frowned and tilted her head. "Of course... I'll talk to her."

"Thank you. Now, I really should be going."

"Me too. It was nice to see you again." Twilight Sparkle smiled and nodded before walking away with a worried frown.

Cheerilee sighed and headed to the school grounds in the opposite direction, a sickening sense of fear sinking into her stomach. She opened the unlocked the back door and headed in, her office down the hall and around the corner. As she turned towards her door, she spotted a young orange pegasus on the floor leaning against the door.

"Scootaloo?" Cheerilee smiled crookedly and raised an eyebrow.

The pegasus sat with her face pressed against the wood and drool dripping down the door to the floor as she snored with her mouth wide open. She began to choke and her eyes popped open. Blushing, she wiped her mouth and stood up.

"Is everything okay?" the teacher asked with a growing smirk.

"Yes. I just wanted to let you know that I can't see you today, because I'm leaving for the weekend," Scootaloo explained mid-yawn.

Cheerilee frowned and crossed her front hooves. "Are you now... This doesn't have anything to do with some big party at the library, does it? I don't want you getting involved in such adult activities."

"Eh, no... I don't know anything about any of that. I'm going to a charity auction with Silver Spoon. We'll be staying the weekend in Manehatten, and I just... I really really want to go." Scootaloo widened her starry purple eyes and pouted.

Cheerilee stood silently and scratched her mane. The thought of Rainbow Dash coming back screaming in the back of her head. "Did you hear about... never mind. Of course you can go. I think some time away from town will do you some good. When are you heading out?"

"In about an hour. I'm going to go meet Silver Spoon now and help her get ready," Scootaloo said as she smiled and hopped up and down, her wings fluttering. "And thank you Cheerilee. I'm glad you're not upset with me."

"Nonsense. You don't really have any obligation to come see me, I just worry, and I'll be here everyday just in case you need to talk." Cheerilee yawned and reached into her saddlebag, then unlocked her office door. "I'll just go catch up on some reading for now."

Scootaloo looked down and let her ears droop. "Oh yeah... How's that coming along?"

"You're a wonderful writer. This diary really pulls me into your life, and I'm actually looking forward to continuing it. I'll talk to you about everything on Monday. I should be done by then." The teacher trotted into the office and grabbed a small bag of bits from her desk drawer.

Scootaloo followed the drawstring bag with her eyes as her teacher trotted up to her and dropped the bag at her hooves. "Huh?"

"I know you probably don't have any money to spend, so take these as a gift and get yourself something. You'll be glad you have something to remember the trip by." Cheerilee nodded with a smile as she headed back to her desk. "Go on now. You're friend is waiting."

Scootaloo fought back welling tears and rushed to her teacher's side, clinging onto her with a tight hug. "Thank you."

"You're welcome sweetheart. Now go on and have fun." The older mare shooed her student away.

Scootaloo trotted back to the door, picking the bag up with a wide smile. She glanced over her shoulder and looked Cheerilee in the eye for a moment, then turned to leave.

The generous mare shut the door behind the young pegasus, then headed into her private office. She pulled the diary out from the lower drawer along with a partially crumpled pack of cigarettes. Flipping the top of the pack open, she pulled the last one out with her teeth, then flipped the diary back open to where she had left off.

Scootaloo tapped on the front door of the Silver Dollar Estates, then began rapidly fixing her mane. The front door creaked open and a tall gray stallion stood in the doorway.

"You're early. We won't be leaving for another hour." Silver Dollar lowered his gaze down the young mare's chin and chest.

"I know sir, I just wanted to see if I could help your daughter get ready to go." Scootaloo gulped and glanced away.

The wealthy stallion rolled his eyes and stepped aside. "Come on in..."

Scootaloo smiled and skipped inside, quickly heading towards the stairway.

"Wait a minute, will you?" Silver Dollar cleared his throat and nodded towards the front door.

The pegasus nodded and slowly stepped back towards him with her ears flat.

"My daughter... she likes you for whatever reason, and because of that I'm allowing you to spend time with her. That doesn't mean I'm okay with you behaving inappropriately at this event. A lot of my peers and very important ponies will be attending. Scootaloo, I know what happened to you. Word travels fast. Ponyville is my home and I hate knowing what kinds of scum bags live in and around here. I'm not just doing this for Silver Spoon, I think the two of you are good for each other right now, and I'm giving you a chance to prove yourself. Don't make me regret it." The older stallion took a deep breath and trotted into another room.

Scootaloo stood quietly staring at the floor, her heart pounding in her head.

"Scootsy?" A voice sounded from the top of the stairs. "Hey get up here."

The pegasus smiled and shook her head, then trotted up the stairs. "Coming."

"I found a dress for you to wear that's perfect for you! Come try it on."

"Do I really have to..." Scootaloo groaned and closed the door behind herself.

"Please please please, Sis!" Apple Bloom whined and stomped on the ground.

Applejack huffed and adamantly shook her head. "For the last time, no. I need you to stay here and keep an eye on the farm. Not to mention the fact that we're just droppin' this here bumper crop off and comin' straight back. You won't get to see Babs anyhow."

Apple Bloom fell to the ground and flailed her front legs around. "You're sooooo mean AJ. I just... I just wanna spend time with my family... Isn't that the thing you said is most important in life?"

Applejack looked down into her younger sister's wide teary eyes and sighed. "Fine... You can tag along and we'll make a quick stop at my auntie's house."

"Can I see Scootaloo at the fancy shmancy charity thing too?" Apple Bloom hopped onto the loaded wagon with a bright smile and dry eyes.

"Uh, we'll have to see about that," Applejack said as she latched the wagon to a small tractor.

"'Kay," Apple Bloom yawned and made herself comfortable atop the bales of hay.

"You best behave, Sugarcube..." Applejack started up the small machine and began navigating it down the long road to Manehatten, the morning sun inching above the treetops.

Cheerilee felt her heart skip a beat as she flipped the page to the next entry.

Entry: Torn in Two

Entry: Torn in Two: Leaving

Entry: Torn in Two,

I've never felt so torn before. I know I should be happy for her, and I feel terrible for not being completely supportive, but I just hate the thought of her going away so much that it's killing me. Just when everything feels like it couldn't get better, she goes and gets accepted into The Wonderbolts Academy. I know it's her dream to be a Wonderbolt, and I think it would be totally awesome if my big sister was one of them... I'm just scared of being left alone. It really hurts knowing this is happening, but I have to go meet her at the pond. I have to say goodbye.

She left today without saying goodbye to me. Maybe she forgot I was waiting for her at the pond, or maybe she just couldn't stand the thought of facing me and was afraid that she'd be unable to go if she saw me. Maybe she just doesn't care about me as much as I care about her. Who am I kidding, of course she doesn't.

I don't feel like being alone anymore, so I guess I'll go hang out with Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. I have to make sure I don't let myself cry in front of them. I just hope they don't ask about Rainbow, or I might not be able to help myself.

Cheerilee shook her head, an expression of sheer disdain appearing as she took in the diary. She turned the page and closed her eyes for a moment, thoughts of Rainbow Dash filling her mind.

I should march over there and give her a piece of my mind... she thought, but quickly recalled that the events she read about took place nearly four years ago.

With a sour pit in her stomach, she sighed and continued reading.

***

I didn't sleep much last night. It felt weird knowing that Rainbow Dash was gone, and that I wouldn't be able to see her for a month or two. I couldn't help but dwell on the fact that she didn't even bother saying goodbye, or letting me know she'd miss me, or anything at all. I don't know what to think, or how to make myself believe that it was a mistake, and that she really does think of me as a little sister. It's just so hard to believe that right now.

The sun was finally rising above the treetops, so it was safe to assume that Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were up. I opened up my bedroom window and jumped out so I could leave without my mom bugging me. I get so sick of her trying to act like she cares about me, when more than half the time she makes it obvious that she couldn't care less. As soon as my dad and his friends get home, it's like I don't even exist.

Whatever. I don't care about her anyway; I'm trying to cheer myself up and thinking about her and the rest of my family just makes me feel worse. I can't wait to see what Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom are up to, they always bring out the best in me.

I hopped onto my scooter and zipped down the road towards the center of town. Sweetie Belle was usually hanging out around her sister's place if she wasn't out crusading with us. Something tells me she doesn't get along with her parents too well either. As Sugarcube Corner came into view, I took a turn on Stable Street and picked up my pace. Dirt kicked up behind me as I sped on, and as I reached the end of the street, I pulled hard on the handle bars. My scooter turned sideways, and I slid across the road, skidding to a stop directly in front of the Carousel Boutique.

A cloud of dirt caught up with me and I coughed, waving the air in front of my nose as I trotted to the front door, pushing my way inside. A bell chimed overhead and a pretty white unicorn rolled her eyes at me.

"What do you think you're doing, Scootaloo?! Just look at all that... ugh, dirt you're getting everywhere." She trotted past me and covered her mouth.

"Sorry. Is Sweetie Belle here?" I asked her, glancing over to her green saddlebag spilled across the floor.

Rarity shrugged and levitated a broom in her aura of magic, her hoof over her muzzle as she swept. "Yes I think so. She was here earlier, but she may have left. Check the front room."

I nodded and pulled my eyes away from her. I wonder if she knows about Rainbow Dash, or what she thinks about everything. I thought those two are good friends, but the more I thought about it, the less certain I felt. Honestly I didn't really care, I had plenty of my own problems on my mind.

"Sweetie Belle?" I called out, trotting into the other room and peeking around.

"Hi Scootaloo!" the little cutie came hopping into the room with me while she hummed. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to see if you and Apple Bloom felt like hanging out. I've had a really bad day, and wanted to see you guys." I lowered my ears and smiled up at her, just being in the same room with her was making me feel better already.

"Uhm, we can hang out, but I already stopped by Apple Bloom's to see if she wanted go crusading with us later, but I guess she's grounded," Sweetie said, her eyes wide and with a grin.

"Grounded for what? And why do you seem so... like, whatever about it?" I shook my head and giggled.

Sweetie Belle blushed and leaned in. "Apple Bloom got caught saying bad words that she learned from Babs, so now she has to do extra chores and can't play with us for a whole week."

That was dumb, I just shrugged it off and nodded towards the door. "I didn't know Applejack was so strict. My mom says bad words to me all the time, and I usually say whatever I want without getting in trouble." At those words, my heart began to sink. I wonder what Rainbow Dash would say to me saying bad words. There was I time when I'd have guessed that she'd yell at me or tell me not to, but maybe she wouldn't care. I don't really know anymore.

"Hmph. I'm just mad that we have to miss a whole week of crusading because Apple Bloom can't keep her big mouth shut. I'd say we could go do stuff, but it'd feel wrong without her." Sweetie Belle lowered her eyes and frowned.

She was right; there was no way we could go crusading without her. I can't even imagine how bad I'd feel if I got my cutie mark without her to see it happen. We're going to get them together, or not at all. "Wanna just go talk at the clubhouse then?"

"Yeah sure. Why do you seem so sad anyway?" She looked me in the eye, then I saw her shiver and flatten her ears. "Oh... I'm sorry Scootaloo. I forgot that Rainbow Dash left to do the Wonderbolts thing, my sister made a big fuss about it earlier. Are you okay?"

I almost choked on the lump in my throat, and felt my eyes flooding with tears. Just the mention of her name broke my heart, and I turned away and trotted outside. I couldn't bring myself to face Sweetie Belle with tears in my eyes. I'm supposed to be strong and brave. I just couldn't look at her. I headed outside and bit my lip, and felt her hoof on my shoulder.

"Scootaloo..."

I took a deep breath and turned around to look at her. She stared at me with her beautiful pale green eyes, and I could feel her heart breaking beneath my own. I reached out to her, and she pulled me against her chest, her hooves tightly pressing against my back. I bit down on my tongue and buried my face in her neck. "I'm sorry, Sweetie. I didn't mean to cry. I really tried not to. I just..."

"Hey, shh. It's okay. I know I'd cry if my sister left. Apple Bloom and I will be here for you though, okay?"

I took her words in, and they only forced more tears to the surface. I'm not sure why, but I began to like the way it felt. I enjoyed the pain in my heart, and my gasps as bursts of emotion poured from my eyes. I squeezed my friend tighter and shook against her, trying to recompose myself. After a moment, I backed away, wiping my eyes and sniffling. "I'm really sorry..."

"Don't be. I'm the one who's sorry. I didn't realize you were so upset, and now I just wanna make you feel better." She looked me over with a crooked smile that made my heart flutter.

I smiled myself as I wiped more fresh tears from my cheeks. "Thanks. You're already making me feel better, but this is still really embarrassing... Mind if we go to the clubhouse where it's more private? I don't need a bunch of ponies stopping and asking if I'm okay. This is hard enough as it is."

"I totally get it. Let's go." Sweetie beamed as she led the way down the street. I looked over at my scooter which was leaning up against the Boutique, and left it behind, trotting up to my friend's side.

I never knew that it could feel so good to cry, and there was still so much left inside that I wanted to get out. The urge started slipping away as we made it to the acres and went down the familiar trail. Just seeing the clubhouse felt like a huge relief, it was so much more of a home to me than anything else in the world.

"So, you're taking this really hard, huh?" Sweetie asked me as she slumped against the wall.

"I can't help it. It's like, just as soon as I finally got the only thing in I've every really, really wanted, it's gone. I almost wish she never said she wanted to be my sister, because this just isn't fair." Guilt coursed through my veins as I said that, because I hated being so selfish, but I couldn't help it. Rainbow Dash was supposed to be my sister, and sisters have obligations!

Sweetie frowned and looked down. "Why weren't you at her send-off thing? Everypony in town was there, and I kept wondering why you didn't show up. I guessed you were upset, but you weren't at your house."

"Wait, Rainbow Dash told me to meet her at the pond to say goodbye! There was a send off? I waited at the pond for hours! I waited all day!" I bit my lip, the familiar pain returning to my chest. "She tricked me?"

"Uhm... I don't know, Scootaloo." Sweetie grimaced and trotted up to me. "I don't know what happened, but I hate seeing you like this. Is there something I can do to help?"

I just sat there, curled up, torn somewhere between anger, confusion, and sadness. I knew Rainbow leaving me would be hard, but with everything that's happened, I just don't know anything anymore.

***

I'm not sure how long I sat there in the clubhouse, just sobbing. I'm glad Sweetie was there with me, because I couldn't have handled it on my own. Even now I can't wrap my head around what happened, or why it did. Why would Rainbow Dash trick me? I thought we were close, and I thought she loved me. I know I love her. I love her so much, and that's why this hurts so bad. I wish I could ask her, or write to her. I don't even know how or where to begin. I can't handle this.

~Scootaloo, out

Cheerilee closed the journal and lowered her head as she thought. I remember this... I remember Scootaloo telling me about this...

She opened another file cabinet and dug through some papers, pulling out an old binder containing Scootaloo's permanent record. Flipping through the pages, Cheerilee spotted some notes she had recorded during her early unprofessional counseling sessions with her student.

Yeah. Rainbow just ditched me and disappeared. I don't really care. It's not like we ever got that close anyway. No big deal.

"Oh Scootaloo... you poor thing." Cheerilee ran a hoof through her mane and over her head. "Why'd you do it, Rainbow?"

Scootaloo lay peacefully on a soft bed, her nose gently pressed up against Silver Spoon's. The train rolled smoothly along the tracks, creating soothing white-noise as the two fillies shared a bed in their private car. The young pegasus yawned and brushed the dangling bangs from Silver Spoon's face, softly stroking her cheek and jawline.

"Hm... That tickles, Scootsy." Silver Spoon smiled and tilted her head away.

"Hey, have I ever told you how amazing I think you are?" Scootaloo whispered, the tip of her hoof trailing down the filly's chest.

Silver Spoon chuckled and shook her head. "No, I don't think you have. So just how amazing do you think I am?"

Scootaloo smiled as she kissed Silver Spoon's cheek and blushed. "I think you're the most amazing thing in the world."

"You're such a flatterer, Scootaloo. You make me so happy..." Silver Spoon leaned closer, softly rubbing her muzzle against Scootaloo's.

"I guess making you happy is what I do best these days. It's something I love doing, too." The pegasus shrugged and closed her eyes, then leaned into her friend's chest.

Silver Spoon wrapped her hooves around Scootaloo's neck and pulled her close, breathing in the distinct scent of her mane as she closed her eyes. She let herself sink into the warmth shared between their bodies, and ran her hooves down the pegasus' back.

Scootaloo let a deep breath out across the young mare's neck, sending shivers up her spine. Silver Spoon gasped and squeezed her friend more tightly. She opened her eyes and scooted down to meet her lover's gaze, their purple eyes locking as their noses brushed against one another.

"Scootaloo... What do you think it feels like to be in love?" Silver Spoon asked as she lowered her gaze and fidgeted.

The pegasus gulped and shrugged. "I don't know..."

"Hm," Silver Spoon giggled. "Maybe someday we can find out together. I think my dad is okay with you spending more time with me. He promised to give you a chance, and I know he'll like you once he gets to know how you really are."

"He told me that I had a chance to prove myself at this thing. I just hope I don't mess it up. I mean, I already know I'm going to feel really awkward in that dress you want me to wear..." Scootaloo widened her eyes and grinned.

Silver Spoon glared down at her lover and shook her head. "Nope. I don't think so, Scootaloo. You are going to dress nicely for me just this once. My dad said this is a big deal for his company, so you looking your best will be sure to impress. Trust me."

"Guh. Fine..." Scootaloo crossed her hooves and pouted.

Silver Spoon giggled and grabbed onto her friend's cheeks. "Come on now. You have to admit that you look ridiculously cute with those little bows in your mane and on your dress."

"I'll admit that I look ridiculous..."

"What can I do to make it up to you? Hmm?" The young earth pony smiled and widened her innocent, purple eyes.

Scootaloo placed a hoof to her chin and thought for a moment. "Okay. How about I get to dress you up later? Seems fair, right?"

Silver Spoon tilted her head and nodded. "Sure, but what did you have in mind?"

"Oh you'll see soon enough." The devious pegasus chuckled and swatted her friend's flank.

"Fine but you better not make me do anything stupid. Got it?" Silver stated with a stern gaze.

"Of course not. It'll be fun. Oh hey, I think we're slowing down," Scootaloo noted as she stood off the bed and helped her lover to her hooves.

Silver Spoon stretched her legs and trotted to the car's window, pulling the curtains back. Sure enough, the train was rolling through the outskirts of the majestic city. "Good, so we'll have a few hours to rest up. I hope you're ready to show off your stuff at the dance."

"Are you kidding? It's gonna be our best one yet." Scootaloo put on a cocky grin and watched the skyscrapers grow taller as they approached.

"I don't know what it is, but you're just, like, the best dancer ever or something. You make me feel dizzy and weightless, I just love it so much." Silver Spoon fluttered her lashes and let herself fall into Scootaloo's forelegs.

The pegasus lifted her friend's front hooves with her own and twirled her around, stepping back towards the bed. "Hey, remember the first time we danced together?"

Silver Spoon chuckled and began to blush. "I do. That was the best night of my life..."

"Mine too." Scootaloo dropped her smile and leaned into Silver Spoon, resting her on the bed as their muzzles brushed together yet again. Scootaloo pressed forward and tilted her head until their lips touched, then she parted her own, gently and lovingly kissing her friend.

Silver Spoon blushed and wrapped her hooves around Scootaloo's neck, pulling the little pegasus overtop of herself. She parted her lips further and became more aggressive, her heart racing and her body tingling. Scootaloo grew uneasy as small gray hooves brushed her sides and ran across her cutie mark.

Silver Spoon detected her hesitance and pulled away from the kiss, catching her breath. "Scootaloo... is there something wrong with me? I don't understand why you... why you keep doing this."

With a painful breath, Scootaloo pressed her face into Silver Spoon's chest. "You're perfect, Silver. It's me..." The pegasus cleared her throat and swallowed a clogging lump. "There's something I want to... I... I need tell you..."

Silver Spoon wrapped her forelegs around Scootaloo's neck and leaned up, taken aback by her dear friend's glistening eyes. "Of course, Scootsy. You can tell me anything."

"Forty-two buckets of oats on the wall! Forty-two buckets of oats! Take one down, pass it around. Forty-uh-forty-one buckets of oats on the wall!" Apple Bloom merrily sang from atop the bales of hay, then let out a deep, overly dramatic sigh. "I miss Sweetie Belle!"

Applejack gritted her teeth and squinted her eyes as she revved the tracker up. "Dang it Apple Bloom! Will you just be quiet for a few minutes?!"

"But I'm sooooo bored! Play a game with me Sis!" the young mare whined and let her limbs fall limp.

The older mare let out a deep sigh and shook her head. "Looky there. Just another hour or so and we'll be there, then you and Babs can play games while I go sell this... hay."

"Can she come home with us?!" Apple Bloom hopped up and leaned over the edge of the bale, staring down at her sister with wide, pleading eyes.

Applejack glanced over her shoulder with a skeptical glare. "Uh... sure, maybe. But only if her mom and sister say it's okay first."

"Yes! Thank you Sis! I promise we'll be extra good, and I'll still do all my chores, and we'll be quiet too!" Apple Bloom rolled over onto her back and placed her hooves over her heart.

"Alright, but don't be too surprised if her sister or mom says no." Applejack stared into the approaching city as she chewed on a stick of wheat.

"Hmm." Apple Bloom shrugged absentmindedly as she stared into the deep blue sky, watching clouds drift by overhead while she imagined the next week or two of her life with Babs.

Cheerilee rested her check on her desk as she tapped the polished wooden surface with the tip of her hoof. Thoughts of the approaching party at the library flooded her mind.

What would Scootaloo think if I saw Rainbow Dash when she wasn't able to... What would I say to Rainbow anyway? What would I do if I saw her now. I can't even... Cheerilee pressed her hooves against her face and scoffed. I'm overthinking this... It's just a little welcome-home party and I'm invited. May as well talk to her while I have the chance.

The clock ticked away, and with a deep huff, she stood off her chair and dragged her hooves to the door. A nervous pit sat in her stomach as she locked her office door and headed out into the cool evening air. It was a short walk across town to the library, and as she approached the typically quiet building, she heard muffled music permeating the oak tree walls.

"Take it easy... don't approach her, and don't provoke her." Cheerilee took several deep breaths, then knocked on the library door.

Twilight Sparkle soon answered and tilted her head with a smile. "Oh, glad you could make it. Come on in and say hi to everypony."

Cheerilee swallowed her disdain and stepped inside, forcing a smile. She glanced around at the many familiar towns ponies, but her gaze found itself fixed on a single target, and her stomach boiled with a volatile concoction of mixed emotions. Rainbow Dash stood with a smug grin and a cocky pose in the center of the room sporting her Wonderbolts uniform. Other ponies gathered around her as she puffed her chest out and carried on.

Cheerilee rolled her eyes and trotted past the crowd to the other side of the room, her gaze fixed on Rainbow Dash as she went. Twilight Sparkle followed her with a crooked smirk.

"Everything alright? You look a little... tense," she asked, chuckling under her breath.

"I'm fine. So how long will she be staying?" Cheerilee asked as she pulled her eyes away from the pegasus.

Twilight shrugged and tilted her head. "I think just for the weekend, or maybe just tonight and tomorrow. Why do you ask? For Scootaloo?"

Cheerilee nodded and sighed. "Yes, because she isn't here right now. She went on a trip to Manehattan with her friends this early this morning, and don't think she knew Rainbow was going to be back in town. It's a shame that she can't stay longer."

"Well, you know. Wonderbolts business and all. I don't understand why she has to leave for such a long amount of time either, but I have to be supportive of her. She's my friend and this is her dream. I'm sure she misses us just as much as we miss her," Twilight said, nodding confidently as she turned away. "I'm going to go mingle a bit. You should say hi too."

Cheerilee flattened her ears as Twilight Sparkle left her sight. She glanced over at a table with adult beverages lining it, and found her source of courage. The teacher took a deep breath as she looked over the drinks, grabbing a plastic cup and filling it with straight Neighgermeister. She sipped on the liquor, cringing as it slid down her throat.

With a tingling rush flooding her head, she stepped towards Rainbow Dash. "Hey, Dash. Mind if I talk to you in private later?"

"Later, sure. Kinda busy right now though." The pegasus nodded towards her friends, who all stood around her, laughing and talking.

Cheerilee raised her eyebrows and took another generous swig of her drink, turning away. "Too busy, huh? I'll be over here."

Rainbow Dash watched the dark pink pony stepping away, wiggling her flank as she trotted. Twilight Sparkle followed Rainbow's gaze and stepped in between. "So Dash, how long are you planning to stay in Ponyville?"

Cheerilee's ears perked up as she stayed facing away and sipping on her drink.

"I gotta head back to Canterlot tomorrow afternoon," Rainbow Dash answered, lowering her eyes. "What's with Cheerilee?"

Twilight blushed and giggled, and empty plastic cup floating in her magical aura. "What do you mean? Nah, ignore her. So when will you be coming back for good, or for an extended period, I mean?"

"I don't know. Hold on." Rainbow trotted around Twilight and made her way across the room, her other friends each looking to each other and shrugging as the pegasus stomped off and tapped Cheerilee's shoulder with some force. "What's your deal? You're giving me dirty looks and acting all snarky."

Cheerilee downed the remainder of her cup and stood wobbly on her hooves. "What's my deal? Nothin'. What's yours? Have you gone and forgotten yourself now that you're some kind of big shot?"

"What are you talking about?" Rainbow Dash snarled and looked away, her uniform gleaming.

"You crushed Scootaloo in every way chasing your dream. I hope it was worth it, because that filly has suffered for it. She's suffered and paid a lot more for that uniform than you have, and what does she have to show for it? Loneliness? Confusion? Tears? You make me sick, Dash. I never should have come here." Cheerilee tossed her cup onto the floor and stomped on it, looking the pegasus up and down with narrowed eyes before stepping towards the door.

Rainbow Dash took deep breaths and watched Cheerilee exit the library. As Twilight placed a hoof on her shoulder, the pegasus smacked it away and stomped towards the exit as well. She pressed through the door and stepped outside, spotting Cheerilee stumbling down the street. With boiling rage in her chest, she took flight and soared up to the mare, landing in front of her with a fearsome pose.

Cheerilee flinched and steeled herself, as wobbly as she was. "What?"

"What's wrong with you? What do you think I did to Scootaloo? It doesn't make any sense! She seemed happy to me last time I checked, and she seemed to like you better than me anyway." Rainbow Dash spat on the ground and stiffened her shoulders. "Why are you trying to make me feel bad about all of this? Everypony else seems to be fine."

"Rainbow, you... you... Ugh!" Cheerilee shook her head and stomped around the pegasus. "I can't deal with you right now. Just go have fun. Scootaloo's better off not knowing you ever came around."

The pegasus looked down at her front legs being adorned by her prestigious suit as Cheerilee walked out of sight, and she gritted her teeth, squeezing her eyes shut. "Scootaloo's fine..." she muttered aloud. "This is stupid... I didn't do anything wrong."

The pegasus turned away, then slowly made her way back to the party. She reached the library door and reentered her party with a wide, forced smile. "Hey guys. Sorry about that. I was gonna go set Cheerilee straight, but she isn't worth my time. I'm here to have fun, not argue, right?"

Twilight Sparkle nodded and trotted up to her. "That's right, so let's get back to it."

Cheerilee trudged into her home, pulling the door shut behind herself and stumbling over to her couch. She fell onto her back and sank into her cushions, staring up at the ceiling and losing herself in thought. She pictured a young, innocent Scootaloo laughing and playing, her bright, carefree purple eyes full of love and hope. Then she began to picture the eyes of the broken young mare she spoke with earlier that same day, so full of doubt and sorrow, and how she lit up at the simplest act of kindness.

"I'm here for you now..." Cheerilee closed her eyes and smiled, dizziness taking her mind. "I love you, Scootaloo."