Circumstantial Evidence

by Mad Hatter

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Zecora, Twilight Sparkle, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 22005

Sun Shower gets a call from the Ponyville Fire Department, and things are more gruesome than usual.

Sun Shower, a rough-and-tumble mare from the Ponyville Fire Department (PFD) gets another call while out. After shooting off her mouth, she discovers what kind of trouble she may be in when she's accused of something heinous.

*This takes place during (And ends just after) season 3*

Published 2012-01-27 08:20:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-27 20:15:30 UTC

Expected Call, Unexpected Reality

Sun Shower had a hard day's (Night's, in this case) work from the Ponyville Fire Department. Crawling back into bed for the second time, the olive pegasus with the two-tone blue and green mane and the cutie mark of rain under a shining orb attempts to get a bit of sleep before work tomorrow. That nutjob Java. I'll never get anything else done fixing his screw-ups.

Ms. Shower had been in the PFD for a little over two years now, having moved from Cloudsdale to Ponyville for convenience. She was good at her job.

She was also perpetually single. Not for lack of beauty though; she had a lean, muscled frame (Though built for a mare), and her wingspan provoked the wings of many colts back in Cloudsdale to react of their own accord. The issue at hand was that she was a tomboy through-and-through. She could get a colt for a night if she wanted, but she wanted a stallion. Big Macintosh was one she kept an eye on for a while, but decided against it. He was a good, hard working stallion, but he was boring; too traditional for a mare that liked the occasional party. Besides, Fluttershy seemed to have a thing for him, and they were a better match in her sea-green eyes.

So it was back to the bar scene on her days off. A small, somewhat rough pub on the eastern edge of town called The Charred Barrel. Pickings were slim (As in most of Ponyville, where single stallions of repute were scarce), but it had potential. Also, that local lush Berry Punch had a tendency to take the desperate colts off her more discerning hooves. Sipping an apple whiskey sour and surveying the scene, she found nothing of interest. Resigned to defeat for another few days, she headed home, seeing Berry leaning on a colt. Looks more like that colt had a fake ID. She's gonna get in trouble one of these days..

A hoof grabs her flank. She whirls around to find another colt, barely old enough to be there from the looks of it. “Heeeey babe, y'don't neeed ta' go home al-alonee.” This guy was wasted. “No, now get some sleep. You've got enough of a headache tomorrow without botherin' me.” she flatly replied. “Whassamatta? Ohhh, yer a filly-fooler ain'tcha? Caan't hand-dle a real stallion!” followed, along with a slap on the flank. She answered this with a backhoof to the muzzle. “Little shit, I said get lost!” She always did have a mouth on her. Fortunately she could back it up when needed. It didn't take any more than that to have the colt back off. “Iiii'm gonna tell all mah fr-*blaarg*”. The backhoof was probably the least of the head pains he'll have in the morning - not that he'll remember the lot of it anyway. She left the retching drunk to go home.

The next morning she sat over toast and tea. A knock on the door was answered to the walleyed face of the mailmare. “Hey Ditzy, how's it goin'?” The question was met with a smile, if not an answer. Ditzy retrieved the mail from her saddlebags and deposited them into Sun's waiting hooves, and flew off again, almost looping at one point before she was out of sight. Shuffling through the envelopes, she likewise found nothing of note. “Junk, junk, junk. Damn, 'nother day of nothing.” was thought out loud as she tossed the collection of papers into a bin.

Work was likewise boring, though that was a good thing. When one's job is putting out fires, a slow day means nopony got hurt from it. A mild surprise though, as Pinkie Pie was hosting one of her regular parties, which tended to end in property damage. The bad news came at the end-of-shift meeting. “Sun, you're on call tonight.” spoke the head of the PFD, a coincidentally red mare by the name of Flash Bright. It meant that Sun had to watch the drinking tonight during her search.

Not that it mattered much. It was mostly drunken college colts again. Sun was just about to leave when she got word of a fire on the northern edge, near the Everfree forest. “Dammit! If it's that psycho Java again I'll tie him to one of his machines and kill him myself if he doesn't do it for me!” was bitterly uttered as she raced to the scene. Yep, it was Java's.

She arrived at the scene with the skill of a powerful flier, and started working on the ring of fire that was carving a circular hole in the side of the workshop barn. When it was reduced to a couple of embers, she charged inside. “You in here?” she yelled into the space. No reply this time. Sun walked into the shop via the gap in the wall when she felt something stick to her hooves. Looking down, she noticed some red substance. Paint? she mused as she looked at the once-again wreckage of the automaton that was to be Java's assistant. She noticed protrusions attached to the machine this time, and looked around. That's when she realized that the hole from the previous fire a little over a week ago wasn't repaired yet, and the consistency of the liquid on the floor definitely wasn't paint. “Oh Celestia...”

Author's Note

Standard warning: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is property of Hasboro, created by Lauren Faust (4th generation). All ponies and locations mentioned, with the exception of Java Chip and Sun Shower, are the properties of above.

Grim Realizations

It was blood. Java Chip had caught himself on the machine when it malfunctioned, and paid for it dearly. The sudden realization brought the smells of the gore and burnt flesh to Sun in a hurry. She had seen death before in her line of work, but this was especially gruesome. A quick check, flying near the ceiling showed that he was the only pony here, and apparently the only victim. She returned to the station and walked into the office. “Get the coroner.” and the address was the only thing she had to say.

Back at the shop, the coroner quickly developed a case of the dry heaves. “Suck it up, the worst is over.” Sun flatly stated. Sans bones and the hoof still attached to the creation, there wasn't much to collect. Plenty to clean up though. Arrangements were made and the Chips were contacted. They reacted as expected.

Sun watched the funeral from a distance. A (Obviously) closed-casket affair, somber and simple, laced with tradition. The standard for earth ponies. She walked home as the crowd herded themselves to the reception for Java's favorite coffees and reminisces regarding him. She had been given a couple of days off; a standard practice for when things like this happened, rare as they were in Equestria.

Sun took a cup of tea, almost feeling bad for not having coffee this time. The record player was set up with a regular of hers.

I must've dreamed a thousand dreams
been haunted by a million screams
but I can hear the marching hooves
they're marching into the streets
now did you read the news today
they say the danger's gone away
but I can see the fire's still alight
and burning into the night

There's too many stallions
too many ponies making too many problems
and there's no friendship to go 'round
can't you see Equestria's in confusion ah ah ah ah

This is the world we live in (Oh oh oh)
and these are the hooves we're given (Oh oh oh)
use them and let's start trying (Oh oh oh)
to make it a place worth living in

Oh Mare-do-well where are you now...

Sun Shower was always into the heavy stuff. She went through her regular workout to this, putting even more energy than usual into it, despite knowing that it wouldn't have saved this one. It was the night she'd usually go out, but these occurrences just ruined the mood. An early night was the result.

The next morning she had the usual routine, almost waiting to get back to work. Sun wasn't heartless by any means, but it was almost expected eventually, and she was mentally prepared for it. What wasn't prepared for arrived in the mail.

Sun Shower,
You are hereby required to report to Canterlot Court Tuesday at nine am. Any attempt to flee will result in capture and an additional charge of evading justice. You will answer any questions before the court and it's heads, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna in all honesty in all cases.
Equestria Dept. of Justice

This was bad news. Sun turned to the other page, filled with normally minor details. It seemed like a mistake of the system until she reached a mid-point.

Murder... Java Chip of Ponyville.

Tuesday was tomorrow. For the first time in a year, Sun felt sick.

Author's Note

Along with the standard notice given at the top of chapter 1, the ponified lyrics are based off of "Land of Confusion": Copyright Genesis (Though this version is based on the cover done by Disturbed).

The Trial: Part One

The Trial: Part One

Tuesday morning Sun arrived at the station. She'd be tired from lack of sleep if the stress wasn't still clinging to the back of her brain. “10 bits please.” noted the service attendant in the monotone voice of a pony who's well jaded with the nine-to-five. Sun paid up, but displayed a mild surprise. “Something wrong miss?”
“No, somethin' else on my mind is all.” Sun replied, though it was about the ticket. When a pony was called to Canterlot, even as a potential criminal, a ticket was generally given with the notice, from what she'd heard. Maybe I'm in more trouble than I thought, and that's a hay of a lot.

The methodical sounds of the beast as it traveled down it's rails towards the mountain where Canterlot resided was uneventful physically, but absolutely wracking mentally. What's gonna happen to me over this? If this isn't cleared up, I'll be jailed. Or exiled. Or exiled and jailed where I... Get it together Sun! That's like saying Pinkie Pie's making cupcakes out of ponies - it's just crazy. I'm sure once this hits the courts it'll be sorted out fast. Gotta calm down. The calming effect of the internal talking-down lasted until the stop at the station.

There was a royal guard at the station, waiting, golden plate gleaming in the late morning sun. Of course they won't just let me walk up there. Sun resigned herself with a small snort at the indignity as she approached the large unicorn. “Sun Showers?” She could tell the barely restrained hostility behind the professional veneer. He knew the details. “Yeah.”
“Follow me.”
The guard had a chariot waiting. It seems that serious cases were just known enough in Canterlot that everypony knew the signs. For the short distance to it parents pulled their foals back from the pair, and someponies shot venomous glances at her before returning to business. Sun returned the favor to the overstuffed and likely overpaid city ponies. Staring down the strangers in defiance couldn't have looked good, but Sun was a pony of action. As soon as she had mounted the chariot's carriage with the guard the action of jamming a hoof upwards into the air in front of her muzzle and making a twisting motion was made. However, it was in turn met with said hoof being slammed to the chariot's floorboards with a resounding thud by the guard. “There's foals out there punk.” he stated, horn's glow dimming. The guard had a near-imperceptible tick of the eye after saying that; the stress was getting to him too. “And I thought my job sucked at times.” After that the guard and Sun kept silent, reaching an understanding on at least one thing. The rest of the trip was spent trying to overhear the pair of pegasi driving.

“...Should have two or three guards. Especially...big one like her.”
“Something about Ponyville...takes care of itself usually.”
“How...small town...”
“Element bearers.”
“Ohh...'s the place.”
“Right.”

The rest was incoherent over the beat of wings, and the whole was not much she didn't already know from having a subscription to the Equestria Daily. Enough time was passed doing this to bring them to a halt relatively close to the castle itself.

Canterlot castle is imposing to anypony to behold it. This was enough to bring the nervousness back as Sun and the guard departed and walked the polished cobblestone way to the entrance. The princesses will see this as a mistake, just have to tell the truth. It'll be fine... Snapping back to reality revealed that her escort had stopped, and they were now in a waiting room. A hoofful of ponies were there as well, in varying states of worry as guards posted at the entrance and a set of even greater doors at the opposite end stood emotionless and still. A colt near the corner was visibly shaking, only to virtually shout “I-I can't take this anymore! I'm innocent!” and bolting for the door. He was taken down before getting halfway across the room. “So am I, but I'm not runnin' like a foal.” she blithely remarked at the pony as he started to cry.

“Next!” called out an officer from behind a desk near the second set of doors. The colt was next, and started looking around frantically as he followed a guard. The tremendous doors shut, making considerable noise even when not slammed, if it were possible for any pony other than Celestia herself to slam doors of that size. Two hours ticked by excruciatingly slowly as Sun watched ponies one-by-one enter and leave the room to face and return from trial. Most of them were for minor offenses, and returned with orders for community service or fines, including the unfortunate colt. The tick of a large wall-mounted clock and a periodic “Next!” was the only respite from the deafening silence that pervaded the room.

“Next!” This one was directed at Sun. She followed the guard to the doors. “Hold it.” he said, and grabbed the papers she got in the mail yesterday from between the feathers of her wings. Shuffling was heard, and the letters were put back, with more of a jab than a placement. Sun sneered but remained looking forward at the wooden gates to ponies' fates. The doors creaked open and they stepped inside, to have them shut behind, locked out from the world. A trio of elderly ponies placed behind podiums stared out at the world currently occupied by the two. One looked over a series of paperwork and her eyes widened. “This is the one. Call in her royal majesties.” In unison all three got up from their haunches and calmly placed themselves in a line to the left of a smaller door in the back. The youngest (Though not by much) gave three sharp raps with his hoof and returned to the line. They called out “Her royal majesties, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna.” and bowed. With that, the princesses entered side-by-side. Sun felt a tug on her back legs and grimaced a bit, but overpowered the feeling and knelt. That damned pony just tried to make me insult them! I see where this is going.

The royalty took places behind two podiums, with the regular judges seated behind them, listening intently to what will transpire. “You may rise.” Celestia stated, her voice regal as her station. Luna looked on with disinterest, likely there to catch up on modern Equestrian law. “As per regulation and standing tradition of the court, you are to answer with all honesty in all matters. For the duration of this trial we are to be answered via our stations, also as per tradition. Is that understood?” Celestia's turn to show a degree of apathy arrived with that proclamation - She didn't like having to play the part of the terrible authority.
“Yes, your highness.” Sun responded with a deep nod.
“Your name?”
“Sun Showers, your highness.” At that Luna visibly rolled her eyes. She must be sick of hearing ponies with her sister's kind of names. Not good for me.
“And you understand why you are brought before the court today?”
“Yes, your highness.”
“And that is?”
“I stand falsely accused of murder.”
“That will be for us to decide.” Luna's royal Canterlot voice rang out.
“You were scheduled to be here two hours ago. What had happened?”
“The first train was full, your highness. I had to wait for the next one.”
“A ticket for that first train was supplied with the summons, was it not?” Celestia raised a brow ever so slightly.
“No, your highness. There wasn't any ticket in the letter.”
The guard stepped forward. “This pony lies, your majesty.”
“What!? I have the -”
“You are not to speak until spoken to!” he snapped back.
“Silence, both of you. Bring forth this proof of either claim immediately.” Luna declared.

Sun gave a single step forward and stretched out a wing. She pulled the letter out to give to the princesses. A ticket fell out of the papers onto the floor. “The hay?” “Guard Stone Hill, retrieve the papers for the court.” Celestia stated. Stone took the letter from Sun forcefully and walked it up, sliding a hoof along the edge of the folded papers. Sun stared at the ticket, dumbfounded by the turn of events for a moment before looking at the papers making their way to the princesses. Then she noticed the guard's running his hoof over a side of the folded letters. Those were folded right after I read - oh, hay no! “Quit tampering with the evidence!” she shouted. Stone froze in his tracks and turned to give a dirty look. “How many times do you have to be told the rules? I am merely delivering as per the orders of -”
“Griffinshit! You're -”

“That is quite enough.” Celestia's use of the royal voice came as a surprise to all involved. Luna perked an ear at this, knowing that something interesting was about to happen. Meanwhile, Sun froze up, realizing that she just cussed out a royal guard in front of the rulers of the known world while on trial. I am so screwed right now... “Deliver the letter here at once.” sang through the halls, no doubt causing consternation in the waiting room adjacent to them, as Stone meekly placed the letter to the podium.

Celestia's horn glowed as the papers separated and Luna looked on with renewed interest. The papers unfolded into three distinct partitions from the folds. Except one, which the top portion lacked. It was also missing a small tea stain in the corner that had soaked through the other two pages. This page was a scheduling sheet, one that would have contained the ticket. Celestia noticed this at once, and stared down at both of them. “Guard Stone Hill, you are hereby suspended from active duty, pending an investigation of this matter. You are dismissed.” The look of fear in Stone's eyes were palpable as he gave a bow and retreated out the doors of the waiting room. Anypony who was in a position to was trying to look into the proceedings during the short time the door was open. Eyes widened even among the guards as they saw the princesses seated in place of the usual judges. Sun narrowed her eyes at him and smiled as he left.

“This is highly unusual, but do not presume yourself free yet.” Celestia warned, as the smile faded. “I would have expected you to inquire about the missing page, as you had one week to reply.”
“Your highness, the letter arrived only yesterday. Not enough time to send a letter back about it.”
“This is troubling. These proceedings were instigated with the idea that the accused had time to prepare. Therefore, you are to return and gather evidence as possible and return. However, due to the extenuating circumstances this case currently involves, a guard will accompany you during this week. In addition, I will personally see to it that the notice with the next travel arrangements will arrive complete and untampered. As it is, this case is now on an extended recess. The guard will arrive shortly.” With that, Celestia and Luna rose and excused themselves, the three judges and Sun bowing again until the door closed behind them. Taking their usual places, the elderly ponies dismissed Sun.

Living Arrangements

Sun left the proceedings with a very mild confusion, but grateful for the stay of punishment - for the time being. She hardly noticed the stares of the other ponies in the waiting room as she passed through. They had better have checked this one. Just past the waiting room, standing calmly at the main doors to the castle, was a new guard. A young pegasus, with a deep brick red coat and flaming orange mane.

“Miss Sun Shower?” He queried. “That's right. Guess you're the one to follow me around while I sort this out, yeah?” Sun stared him right in the eyes. The gaze was met with a calm, only slightly stoic expression. Good, this one looks like he'll give me the time of day. Sun was pretty good at reading ponies, or specifically those under stress. It helped when working with the Ponyville police on suspicious fires. Royal guard was close enough in her mind, it had to be stressful. “Correct. Blaze Fire.” extending a hoof. “Transport back to Ponyville has already been arranged.” After completing the hoofshake, and noticing that Blaze was of a similar strength to her, though oddly of the standard pony build, she followed him to the station.

This time the direct intervention of the castle assured a smooth transition. Soon they were on the next train to the Ponyville area. The time was spent going over the details of the case, though few. “And so you found the body upon arrival.” asked Blaze.
“Right. Nasty that was. Still owe the cleanup crew a couple of drinks for that one.”
Blaze looked like he was going to be perplexed for a moment at that. “Why would you owe them drinks for doing their job?”
“Fire department, cops, forensics ponies, we're all pretty tight like that. When one of us has to deal with somethin' like that, the rest of us chip in on relaxing after.” After a moment it sunk in precisely how bad her owing somepony over that sounded. The resulting facehoof could be heard in the next car of the train. “You guards got anythin' like that? Or does nothing happen over there knowing your boss could take out any problem herself?”
“You're referring to the princesses Celestia and Luna, correct?”
“Yeah. Makes me wonder why they have guards at all.”
“Same reason we have the judges, accountants, and other ponies every other town has. There's only so much time in a day, even for the princesses. Or night, for that matter.”
“Makes sense. What doesn't is why that Stone jackass tried to plant the missing part of the letter. Or why I was charged in the first place. Everypony who knew about Java's inventing knew to stay away. He messed with dangerous stuff; kinda reckless. Lot of the ponies in my department knew something like this would probably happen sooner or later. I mean, it was sad, but it was basically expected ya know? We were ready for it.”
“I see.”

With that dispensed with, the conversation drifted to less serious matters. Small talk, other news from their respective towns, pony-interest stories. “Not entirely sure why Spitfire strings her name together like that. Stage presence I suppose, or perhaps because she always hated it when other ponies just called her Spit.” Blaze wondered aloud during a part about the Wonderbolts. Sun's eyes widened a bit at that. “Spitfire's your sis?” Blaze nodded. “I see the show when they perform in Canterlot. Royal duties, however, rarely have me outside of the city.”
“Least you can get some fresh air out in Ponyville then.”

Having run out of things to say for the time being, they trotted from the station to Ponyville, both thinking on where to start. The sun reaching it's nadir on the horizon shifted thoughts to that of sleep. With mutual agreement they headed to Sun's place. Surprising all this trial mess was only a day. “We'll get started tomorrow, shouldn't take long to get all the facts. Where're you staying?” Sun said while stifling a yawn.
“Here.” Blaze replied in a borderline monotone.
“...What? Oh hay no!” Sun snapped both to full attention and at the guard.
“It should not come as too great a surprise. You are still effectively on trial.”
“Oh, yeah... Well, guess I can't really argue that. Hold on.”

Sun went to a storage closet and dragged a spare mattress with her teeth to the parlor floor. “Good thing some ponies I hang with party a bit too hard sometimes. Don't try anything stupid, or -”
“That is not what I'm here for Ms. Shower.” Blaze interjected. “And remember to watch what you say.” She snorted at that “Gonna have to get used to that. Good thing it's only a few days.” Considering the arrangements Sun was surprised they didn't send a mare. Maybe he's getting punished for something, heh. Sleep came quickly despite the events of the day.

Morning Ritual/Investigation: Part One

Morning Ritual/Investigation: Part One

Waking up at the usual time, Sun trotted to the kitchen for her morning tea, only to find another pegasus sleeping on the floor in the living room. “What the bu-” was interrupted by the mental click as the shock obliterated the common morning haze. Oh yeah, on trial for murder. Buck... How many ponies can say that? The morning musing was stopped by Blaze's getting up. She wasn't sure if the outburst woke him, or if he was just used to getting up at this time, not that it mattered. “Mornin'... Er, Blaze, right?”
“Blaze Fire, correct miss Sun Shower.” Apparently Blaze was more of a morning pony than Sun was, lacking the dim eyes and slightly gritty voice Sun displayed.
“Well, I better offer breakfast. No use having two guards pissed at me.” Making a mental note to buy more groceries than usual next trip and cursing her fate again, she dug through cabinets and the icebox to produce some eggs and wheat.

A few minutes, a couple cups of tea, and some sustenance put anything still out of focus back to it's proper place. They ate quietly, lacking any new information since the trip back to Ponyville. Putting the dishes in the sink Sun declared “Right. First the workout, then we get going on this.”
“Workout miss Sun Shower?”
“Yeah. Can't be slow when this's all over.” In a small room off to the side between the parlor and bedroom was a number of weights and miscellaneous equipment, as well as the record player on a small table in the corner. “Grab a record, gotta have music for this.” Silently obliging Blaze picked out one with a sleeve in various greens and placed it on the player. Within a few notes Sun smirked to herself. Of all the things for a royal guard to put down, heh.

I first met this colt by the Clopton Street tracks
In no shape for success headed nowhere too fast

He may've been somepony once by the sound of his call
Now he answers to no one, no one at all

We all die alone, he shouted as he passed
with no sense of regret, see he never looked back

For his pride was wounded, his ego was strong
Yea that was his trouble and this is his song

You said we die alone, in this case you were right
No friends by your side or family in sight
There'll be no talking your way out this time
So don't count the bits 'cause you leave 'em behind

His friends come and go like the seasons and tide
He can't keep a mare they all realize
He loves them, leaves them, takes what he needs
He's loyal to no one, no one at all

Blaze couldn't understand the light chuckle Sun gave as she started, until he listened to the lyrics while waiting. Attempting to deflect embarrassment from his pick, he asked “So you a clover, or just like the music?” Sun shot him a dark glare at that. “Highlander. You'd have had a lot of angry ponies at you callin' someone a clover over there. Grandparents were anyway.”
“Oh. My apologies Sun Shower.”
“Guess it's OK, seeing as you prob'ly weren't taught about countries Canterlot doesn't seem to hold a hoof over as much.”
“What do you mean 'hold a hoof over'?”
“The Highlands pretty much run themselves. Old honor codes make most of the law over there. They don't cause no trouble, and it works fine without anypony stepping in.”
“I see.”
“Haven't visited in a while. Maybe take a vacation when this' over.”

Cleaning up afterwards, Sun threw on a saddlebag and stepped out with Blaze in tow. The first stop was, unsurprisingly, the fire house. "Hey Sun. Hear some crazy stuff about you going to Canterlot for a trial or something."
"Yeah. That crap's true too." she somewhat sarcastically replied, jerking her head back to draw attention to the guard. "Busy day, we need to see Flash. Now."
"Y-Yes, sure Sun. Hey boss!" The firepony rushed to the office. In a tinted window they could see the outlines of both of them, hooves flying in the air as if in a panic. Sun walked up to the door and impatiently waited, tapping a hoof at the indistinct noise coming from the next room. Within a minute the door opened and the pony left in short order. Sun and Blaze entered quietly to face a rather nervous Flash Bright. "Calm down boss. This here's an investigation, so all you have to do is answer Blaze here.
"Yes Flash Bright, it won't take long. Sun, if you would."
"Would what?"
"Protocol to prevent ponies from putting words into somepony's muzzle."
"Oh. Makes enough sense. It'll be the same thing I told you earlier anyway." she confidently assured as she left. More indistinct words, sans hoof-waving ensued. A half hour later Blaze returned, a handful of papers in hoof. Sun preempted any attempt to get the first word in with "Reports from other fires that pony started. Good."
"In as many words, yes."
"While I'm guessing this stuff, you need to see city hall for some more records."
"...Correct Sun Shower."
"Sun'll do, day's too short to be formal for all of it. Save that for the mayor. The wait for that place is gonna be a pain."
"Very well miss Sun."
"Just Sun."
"Miss Just Sun."
Sun blinked. Did this guy just get a riff out on me? This might not be as bad as I'd thought.

The wait at city hall was just as Sun feared. Blaze stood stoic as paper-pushing ponies gave them both looks, while Sun was valiantly fighting the urge to make snide comments or rude gestures. Remember, pissing 'em off will only make the wait longer. It took nigh the rest of the day to aquire the obituary, the government copy of the fire reports, and for him to get some words with the mayor.

Author's Note

For the record, I know I'm mixing Irish and Scottish here. Was originally going to call it “haylander”, but highland is an actual breed of pony, so I think it fits even better. The lyrics below (With minor changes) are "Loyal to No-One" by Dropkick Murphys and unchanged lyrics are the property thereof.

Shopping/Investigation: Part Two

Shopping/Investigation: Part Two

The next morning brought a new problem along with the investigation. Being on trial for murder generally doesn't come with paid leave, and this was no exception. Breakfast was reduced to an single egg (Split amongst the two of them) and wheat grits, and shopping was added to the list of things to do. Trawling the bar scene for somepony left little in the way of savings, and cooking for two just added insult to injury. But first came the usual workout.

You say you don't wanna hide
A muzzle no one knows
And everyone you meet
You wanna show
You're nopony's slave
Nopony's chains are holding you
You hold your hoof up high

Sun deposited a small bag of bits into her saddlebags and left with Blaze to the market. The arrival of a royal guard who was not hobknobbing with the Elements of Harmony prompted questions that Sun would rather not bother with. Soon enough she discovered that answering them truthfully kept others at bay. They'd better run it in the paper that I'm innocent when all this' done. she thought with a dissatisfaction that could almost be felt outside her mind. A couple of salesponies were loath to deal with her, for fear of loss of reputation. Blaze's simple, blunt command to barter as normal likely provoked more fear than the charges levied at Sun (What pony says no to a royal guard?). In the end she was still convinced she got some sort of upcharge, and it looked like provisions for the rest of the week were to be barley, beans, and other fare as cheap as the dirt they were grown in. Fortunately for both, one salespony was entirely on the level with them, an orange filly dealing apples. Still high in terms of pantry fare, but the last bit supplied lunch. She even threw in a second one on-the-house, with a tip of a hat towards the guard and a smile to Sun. "Thanks, I'll owe ya one sometime."
"Think nothin' of it sugarcube. Ah'm sure you got enough on yer plate without worryin' about not havin' enough on the other." the blonde-maned pony replied in a drawl.
"Thanks again." Sun said with a slight smile and a nod, and turned towards home with Blaze. "Dunno what they feed you guards up in Canterlot, but it'll have to do."
"It's all pre-prepared en mass for the force. Often simple, so this isn't too far off."
"Good to know I won't be annoyin' the escort on top of all this crap." she flatly noted, heading towards home and wondering what the hay rams had to do with the extraordinarily cheap noodles mixed in with the rest.

Once the foodstuffs were put away, Sun looked at the clock on the wall. Not much time left, not enough for the library's collection of law books. She thought on the next step for a moment. With the sun going down, the idea that latched on had to wait. Tomorrow they would search the scene.

Your cruel device
Your blood, like ice
One look, could kill
My pain, your thrill~

I wanna love you but I better not touch
I wanna hold you but my senses tell me to stop

Blaze was getting used to this kind of music, going to far as to join in the workout with a set of weights Sun wasn't using. "Can't let myself get soft either, after all."
"Good call Blaze, but we're not sharing the bath."
"Aww..." The sudden realization of that remark left Blaze to quickly add "Sorry, that was highly unprofessional of me."
"S'okay. Your wings are down, so you're got more control than some other ponies." Blaze decided not to comment on that one.

The scene was cleaned up and the property left void of warning tape. Unsurprisingly, the house hadn't had any prospective buyers yet. Houses that site unusual deaths do tend to provoke a superstitious wariness from the masses. Plus it had only been a few days. Seems a lot longer. Sun mused as they slowly paced through the large hole left in the wall from Java's suicidal explosion. The place was as disheveled as she remembered from earlier (And more successful) trips to fight fires. The workbench contained books at varying pages, the open ones with a thin layer of dust and a couple spots of dried blood stain the cleanup crew couldn't get. It was cleaned, but the stains will stay there. Twilight will have some questions of her own when they're returned. "Can't read this stuff, looks like manuals to somethin'." Sun jerked her head toward the open books from Blaze and trotted to another section of the shop while he tried his hoof at making sense of it.

Scanning over boxes with labels only a mechanic would use, and some that nopony would. She pulled down a box marked "Flux Capacitor" and looked inside. Nothing but assorted screws and small spare parts. Whatever. The massive assortment of pipes that formed Java's prototype industrial coffeemaker remained on the table, the remnants of the last brewing black and thick as tar after the fire below had reduced it to a fraction and went out. next to it was another thin layer of dust. Sun looked around at the other shelves and found it about the same. She was trotting back towards Blaze when it hit her That's the only thing that crazy pony kept clean. "Hey, check this out!." He trotted over to the machine with her.
"I don't see any difference."
"This is the only thing here he ever kept clean. It shouldn't be dirty as the rest." She wondered as she ran the edge of a hoof over the layer and brought it to her muzzle. Her pupils dilated instantly. "Not dust!" She quickly shook her hoof off and pawed the floor to clear it.

Blaze produced a small evidence bag from his saddlebags and pushed two hoof-lines of the powder into it before sealing it. "Better take this to Ms. Sparkle."
"Whozatagain?" Sun stuttered, clearly agitated. Darting her head left and right "Whatzinthatstuff?!"
"Twilight Sparkle the librarian, and current holder of the Element of Magic. She'll have the tools we need I think"
"Ohyaya."
"Are you alright Sun?"
*Thud*

Author's Note

The lyrics are (At least the unchanged portion) "I Wanna Be Somebody" by W.A.S.P.. All rights reserved, etc.
As a side note, if anyone's currently in that piss-broke state commonly associated with ramen, a big bag of rice (The slow cooking kind) is overall the same or cheaper, as well as healthier than ramen. Lived off rice & beans for months, and no worse for the wear for it - it just gets kind of bland. Hope that helps someone :) Sorry for the delay in this chapter.

Lost Time/Investigation: Part Three

Lost Time/Investigation: Part Three

*Beep* *beep* beep*

The Ponyville General's machines kept a rhythmic time attached to the unconscious form of Sun Shower. Blaze kept watch most of the day, stepping out for a quick lunch, and more importantly, to send a letter to Canterlot regarding the events and deliver the sample to the library.

"We're not sure what caused it yet, but it appears that her system went into 'overdrive' if you will. Extreme excitement, followed by a massive drop in blood pressure. The loss of consciousness was her body's reflex from the resulting crash to prevent additional damage. Unusual, the rare cases we get of this are almost entirely overdoses. Obviously I can't tell you who the others were, you know patient confidentiality. She isn't known for this though."

"Estimated time of waking?" Blaze asked in a tone that hid the majority, but not all, of his trepidations.

"Unknown." the pale gray nurse replied professionally. "This one shouldn't be permanent, but it could be weeks. Expecting a few days."

"I've heard that ponies can hear in this state, and familiar sounds can help. Is that true?"

"It's not a guarantee, but it's commonly considered a comforting influence, and will help on occasion."

Blaze gave a smirk that unnerved the nurse a bit. "I'll be back in an hour. Keep ponies with sensitive ears away." With that, he was gone before the nurse could ask precisely why.

Weights, not now. They have tea in the hospital. Here we are! Blaze balanced the record player on his back, and grabbed a random record in his mouth, heading back to the hospital.

He began to set up the player next to the bed, cone pointed at Sun. The nurse trotted in just as he was finishing. "Ah, of course. Many families have brought in music. But that doesn't explain why you said not to let any ponies with sensitive ears near."

Blaze chided himself a bit for implementing such a rather unprofessional act, but wrote it off to a necessity. He smiled at the nurse. "You do now." The needle hit the record.

Whoooah, come on!
Close the city and tell the ponies that
Something is coming to crawl
Death and darkness are rushing forward to
Take a bite from the wall, oh

You've nothing to say
They're breakin' away.
If you listen to foals, the mob rules
The mob rules

Kill the spirit, you'll be blinded, the end is always the same
Play with fire, you burn your hooves and

"What the hay are you doing!?" Nurse Redheart practically shrieked as she ran into the room, taking a stance next to the nurse.

"Wakin' me up, what did you think he was gonna do?" Sun gave a weary smirk to the shock of the medics, but not to the guard. "Let's get outta here, we need to find what Twilight's found on that powder and we lost too much time as it is."

The hospital protested the unusual event, but the word of a royal guard was not to be questioned. They grudgingly signed the paperwork and allowed them to leave, along with a few other release forms that essentially entitled them to amnesty if Sun drops dead. Blaze noted this to Sun, who was mindlessly hoofwriting her signature on each page in turn. "Trust me." was all she said, and from what Blaze had heard from the firehouse's other members, this was to be believed.

After stopping just long enough to drop off the record player, they cantered to the library-tree. Spike answered the door, to nopony's surprise. "Can I help y.... A royal Canterlot guard? Twilight!" he yelled. "Oh, uh, come on in."

A lavender young mare trotted down the stairs. "I'm in the middle of some important research Spike, what do... Oh. Hello again Mr. Fire, Ms. Shower. Honestly I expected you a little earlier, but I'm almost done. Follow me please."

"Earlier? Blaze, how long was I out?"
"About a day and a half Sun."
"WHAT?"
"With Blaze escorting you, I presume this is timely business."
"Yeah, I got about 3 days, if that, to prove I didn't kill nopony."

Twilight displayed a rare image for a moment: Confusion. "But doesn't Canterlot law give more advanced notice for court dates?" she queried.

"Usually yeah, but this son-of-a-diamond-dog was messi-"
Blaze cut her off. "Ms. Sun, regardless of opinions or other matters, that is not to be discusses as such."
"Whaddaya mean?"
Blaze thought for a moment. "Consider it a separate trial. We are not to influence the public in these matters while said trial is ongoing."
Sun was nonplussed. "Fine." Turning back to Twilight "Anyway, I have time now instead of before. I gotta know what's in that dust."

"Oh yes, the particulate matter you brought to my attention! Follow me please." she noted, back to her usual analytical self as soon as research was mentioned.

The trio trotted to a basement laboratory where beakers and samples of various materials were laid out in sections according to types, and then according to alphabetizing per the periodic tables.

Twilight approached one of the tables, and drew a paper closer with a hoof before focusing on the writing. "This substance is natural, though refined via means I don't personally know right now. It was done organically, and doesn't bear any traces of artificial ingredients or other tampering or the base product. It's composed of 98.5% coffee, and 1.5% cocoa, both refined to the highest degree of their functional chemicals."

Sun blinked. "Say that in Equestrian."
"Coffee and chocolate, turned into almost-pure caffeine. Dangerously strong." she explained again, with slight annoyance at having to re-word it in such a way. "It also explains your temporary coma. Anypony who isn't inured to this level would experience extreme agitation, followed by nigh-immediate slowing of functions at it's zenith."
Sun raised an eyebrow.
Twilight sighed and translated. "You went hyper, then 'crashed'. Hard."
Sun nodded. "Makes sense. So what does it all mean?"

Twilight paced a bit as she read the last of the sheet, now suspended in front of her in her trademark-hued glow. "Everything here would leave traces of artificiality. The only... of course! We need to see Zecora. She would probably know how to do this naturally." She looks at a clock on the wall. "But it's so late now. We can go tomorrow."

Sun double-checked the clock Twilight just looked at, followed by sinking spirits. "Yeah, it is that late. We'll be here first thing in the morning, this needs to be done fast."

Author's Note

No, I don't know much about medicine. The song is "The Mob Rules" by Black Sabbath. Did I already use this one? Damn I should've finished the story by now. Sorry for still writing this; I'd just done major work on my computer, and lost some things (Like the copy of this that isn't hosted on FIMFiction.)

What Once Was/Investigation: Part Four

What Once Was/Investigation: Part Four

Millennia ago while lost in barren seas
There whispered murmurs of a bloody mutiny
We took up arms, slain Lunar Guards of rank
Blades drawn, wings tied the captain walked the plank
As he fell down to the depths, he swore a deadly curse
With Tartarus my final fate, you'll all soon die or worse
Now we stare down Celestia, waiting for the end
I'll say these final words my friend~
At sunrise we all trot the hempen jig
So raise your hoof, your pint of rum and take another swig
The curse of Captain Maregan has led us to this fate
So have no fear and don't look back, the afterlife awaits

By this time Blaze Fire had gotten into the exercise routine that Sun Shower held. It was a bit shorter than normal, mere maintenance to the usual. "Fifth day, and we're just now gettin' somewhere. This better be what we need." she mused under the weights.
"Indeed." Blaze intoned.
The trot through town was less eventful than previous days, as ponies had gotten used to the sight of the imperial escort. Perhaps seeing Sun with her muzzle still held high after these days was a form of proof of her innocence to them. Trotting past town to the edges of the Everfree Forest, however, elicited some odd looks.

The two stuck to the path that had been partially worn by Zecora and the Bearers. The creatures had begun to avoid this throughway, content to skulk and hunt in the shadowed corners they were used to.

The presence of foreign masks marked the hut as Zecora's home, just as Twilight had described.
"This must be it." Blaze said matter-of-factly.
"Nah. It must be off in the swamps. Y'know, next to all that stuff that wants to eat us." Sun sardonically remarked.
"Smartass." He replied with a smirk. Sun offered a small smile of her own as they approached, and Blaze knocked on the door and waited for the answer.

The door looked crude to an outside eye, but was actually quite well-made of the natural woods of the forest. It opened outwardly without a squeak. "Ah, Twilight, I was expecting you. Here for a recipe or a book or two... Pardon me, but not whom I was expecting to see. Who might you two be?"

"Blaze Fire, and the mare to my side *glancing over* is Sun Shower. Twilight did send us, but seemingly not on business you expect." Sun held out a hoof and gave a jarring hoofshake to the zebra. "Heard you'd know about this stuff." she said as Blaze produced a bag of the powder.

Zecora looked into the bag, and her face visibly lengthened. "I know of the powder of which you produced, come inside for what must be deduced." She held the door open with a hoof as Sun and Blaze followed the instruction. Closing it, she trotted to the wall bearing a number of herbs as the other two took a seat next to a large cauldron. She came to a table nearby and with a sprinkling of herbs and a wave of the hoof produced three cups of a steaming liquid. "Here then, take a drink. The story you hear may not be what you think." The three of them took up a cup and had a sip, a very mild, soothing tea. "We are here to inquire about that powder and the fate of one Java Chip." requested Blaze.

Zecora went back to the shelf and took a hoofful of another powder, and with a puff of breath produced a green-tinted illusion of the pony in question. A stallion with a long mane and glasses over a work apron. "I knew of this Java Chip. And of how fate had sailed his ship."

Sun, lacking in decorum, bluntly asked "Why do you talk like that anyway?" as her escort facehoofed.

"The history of home is often sung, and Equestrian is not my native tongue. To acknowledge the way one has come, I have no need to change the way it is done." She replied, preempting the mare's next question with a slight smirk. She resumed a stoic expression and turned to the illusionary image. "The substance you bring is of my make, and I have warned him of amount of intake."

"So you created this then." noted Blaze.
"Others have bought it from my store, with warnings if they take any more."
"Have any more of the stuff?" asked Sun.
"The production of it I have quit, for the history of it sour does sit." she sadly explained with her muzzle towards the ground.
"So he took too much of it?"
"A side-effect taken a turn for the worse, overdone it can by a type of curse."

Zecora took a long draught of the tea, nerves shaken by the memories. "He had proven trustworthy of a larger supply, if only I had known how strong his inspiration and why..." Her eyes began to well up, no mere tea capable of handling the memory of what's happened on her watch.

Sun looked on with compassion. "Don't blame yourself Zecora. Java was...weird, to say the least." She put down her cup and turned to Blaze. "Think we've done enough damage. Got everything you need?"
"Yes. It's obvious what happened. We are sorry for bringing up the memories Miss Zecora."
"It is alright, these things must be set to light." she somberly replied. The two exited quietly and headed back towards Ponyville, passing Twilight on the way with a saddlebag full of books.

Inside the hut, Zecora waved away the phased image of Java. "What brings on this tear... The past, or that he was sincere?..."

Author's Note

Original lyrics are from "Captain Morgan's Revenge" by Alestorm. This ties in more strongly to Madness By The Cup, so if anyone's confused about Java and Zecora's reaction, the answer lies in there.

Delivery/Ancient Laws: Part One

Delivery/Ancient Laws: Part One

The sun rose diligently over Ponyville as Sun and Blaze mused the last few days over the increasingly cheaper breakfast.

"Think we got everything we need to prove this?" Sun asked.
"Yes. The reports from the fire department, previous history, and the zebra all point to the same conclusion."
"That Java was more messed up than a fruit bat in a salt mine?"
"In as many words, I suppose."

Blaze went over notes and transcriptions of the interviews of the past few days, including copies of fire reports and city hall's effects before the final accident. "It seems obvious to me at any rate."

"Right. Now we can relax a bit and really get things done."
"What do you mean?"
"You think the piddly little morning workouts were what I do? Heh, that's nothing. On a good day I could tire out the royal guard!"
"With all due respect, I doubt that Sun."
"Wanna make a bet on it?"
"I'm forbidden from gambling on royal duty."
"Whatever. Then a challenge. Keep up with me?"
"I'll take that challenge."
"Heh, let's rock!"

Sun grabbed a set of weights, and tossed one to Blaze. He caught it with minor difficulty, not expecting a heavy weight to be practically thrown at him. "You know what to do." She put a record on and started pumping the iron to the tune.

We the ponies of the country of Equrestria, in order to form a perfect friendship
Stop pretendin' that you've never been bad, you're never wrong an' you've never been dirty
Like Celestia, that ain't the way we see you
Ahh, you wanna rule us with an iron hoof, change the lyrics become alicorns
Like Stallionrad, you ain't my dad or mother (They never knew anyway!)
'Cause I never trot away from what I know is right, but I'm gonna face my flank to you
Freedom! We're gonna ring the bell, freedom to rock, freedom to talk
Freedom! Raise your hoof and yell, freedom to rock, freedom to talk
Freedom, ring!
Ahh, acting Celestial in your ancient tower
Back off preachy, don't care if it's festival
I ain't no angel, but I never felt better

The song continued as Sun got back into her vibe. Blaze kept up well, but started flagging a bit towards the very end. A few more songs in they were both sweating like tartarus.

"Not bad. Not many keep up with me, stallion or not, heh."
"I must admit, you're accomplished at this."
"Comes with the job, my little pony." She bragged with a smirk.

Truth be told, Blaze was just barely behind Sun. After their turns in the shower they both settled down to rest a bit. Then, a knock came at the door. Sun opened up without fanfare to find about the only pony that required it.

Celestia stood at the threshold, a pair of guards in golden armor at her sides. Sun turned her muzzle towards Blaze. "Hey Blaze. Uh, you're gonna wanna get over here for this..." Blaze looked up from the pile of reports and scribed interviews to see the solar diarch. Rainbow Dash couldn't have gotten to the door faster. He quickly bowed and regained his professionalism. "Welcome, your majesty. What would you require of us this day?"

Celestia gave a smirk imperceptible to all but the royal guards at her flanks. She levitated a scroll from the saddlebag of the one to her right and placed it in front of Blaze. "As promised, the arrangements for travel tomorrow."
"Yes. Thank you, Princess."
"Oh yeah, almost forgot about that part. Thanks your highness." she said with a slight bow.
The serene goddess took a step back from the door. "And with that, even royalty are forbidden from all but the most necessary interventions during such situations. I must return to Canterlot."
"Can I ask a question first Princess?" Sun asked as Celestia had half-turned towards the street.
"Provided it has nothing to do with the trial itself, you may." as she looked back, and her guards (Even if only there for show) exchanged looks of annoyance at the situation.
"What happened to that pony at... Well hay, guess the question does have the trial in it."
"Watch your muzzle around royalty" The guard to her left admonished.
Celestia nodded. "It does have to do with the trial, so there will be no direct answer for that. Suffice to say it's been taken care of, so do not worry about it upon your return to Canterlot." With that she resumed facing the royal flank to the building and spread her wings.
"Fare you well, Princess." Blaze said as a downward gust gave notice of royalty's departure.

That mare reminds me of a filly I've met before. Wonder if they've met. Celestia thought to herself as the three flew back to Canterlot.

Sun unrolled the scroll and looked over it alongside Blaze. As expected, a virtual copy of the one from last time, save the changes in dates and a pair of tickets for the new trial. "How's the other stuff lookin'?"
"Completed. It seems we have all we need to proceed with the trial tomorrow. Looks like the only thing that's left is to return the law books to Ms. Sparkle's library."
"Better get that done then so we can relax a bit."

The pair trotted towards the immense tree-house at a leisurely pace they haven't been able to take in the past week. The interior was spotless as always, with the small purple dragonling and the Princess' prodigy going over lists. It was a checklist far too long for any sane pony.
"Trip to Sofas and Quills to restock...check!" as the clawed appendage scratched a mark on the list.

"'Scuse me."
"Oh! Pardon me, a little lost in the list. What can I help with?"
"Here to return some books." as Sun unloaded a half dozen law books onto a nearby table, the audible *thunk* of the heavy tomes resonating for a second.
"Thank you. Oh yes, there's another pony who was waiting for these. Law isn't the most studied subject in Ponyville, so we don't have many copies. Spike, could you please go tell him that the books are here? He was in a real hurry to get them."
"Wonder why anypony else'd need law books so fast 'round here?" Sun asked, turning to Blaze.
"Something about slander and family. Oh, sorry! I probably shouldn't have mentioned anything. Oh, is this list ever going to get done?..." Twilight absentmindedly replied while going over the checklist again.

Sun and Blaze stood there for a moment, somewhat mystified by the lavender unicorn. The door swung open again and Spike walked in, another pony trotting right behind him. He wore the scowl that designated either a bad attitude or a bad hangover. He looked at the stack of books and immediately began to slide one off the other until he found a pair on modern Equestrian law.

Seems familiar.

The pony looked up at the pair and bluntly asked "What're you two looking at?" His gaze settled on Sun, and it clicked for both of them. Buck, it's that drunk from last time. "Oh, nothin'." Sun replied, doing a bad job of hiding the smirk.

"Yeah, yeah." He picked up the books and walked towards the door. On the way he bumped into Sun and dropped to a knee. "Ow! You assaulted me!"

Twilight and Spike looked up from the list with surprise and stared at the scene.
"You all saw it! I'm getting a lawyer."

Blaze gave a steely gaze at the colt. "She did no such thing."
"Prove it!"
"I am Blaze Fire, royal guard dispatched from Canterlot to witness events regarding Miss Sun Shower, and I saw what you were attempting to do." The colt shut his muzzle with a snap. He slunk out of the library, muttering under his breath "All her fault, filly-foolin' diamond dog..."
"Who was that Sun?" he asked.
"Some drunk that tried to rut me back last time I was at the bar. Slapped my flank a couple times an' I stopped it fast."
Twilight would have a visible blush if her fur was only a shade lighter. "Woulda liked to just knock the stupid outta him, but I'm not tryin' to get into any more trouble."

"Yes. Unfortunately there is no recourse for this that I see. The old laws regarding duels must have been repealed by now." Blaze said somewhat apologetically.
"Duels? Ponies used to be able to do that?"
"Used to, yes. The institution fell out of practice a couple hundred years ago."
"Guess that's why the laws were taken out. Too bad. Some ponies have it comin'."
"Think they were repealed..." Blaze pondered.
"Think?"
"Yes, well... Nopony has invoked them since well before our generation."
"Huh. Hey Twilight. You know what old laws are still around?"

Twilight racked her brain over it. "The Dry Equestria act was repealed with the return of Princess Luna.."
"Wow, only that long ago?" Sun interrupted. She would have to deliver a personal thanks to Luna for that tomorrow.
"...Yes. And the Equestrian tax code was modified eight years ago with the last census and again a few months ago with the revival of the Crystal Kingdom. But.... The laws of duels haven't been touched. Just ignored since nopony uses them. Very few laws are actively removed due to disuse."

Midway through the last sentence Sun had opened the book on ancient Equestrian law and was hoofing through the table to contents.

"With all due respect Miss Sparkle, how did you know this?" Blaze asked.
"Oh, when Luna returned we - well, after the reunion with Celestia - were teaching her about modern Equestria. It seems that Celestia actively avoided changing many laws during the thousand years. So the ancient laws are still in effect, they're just not enforced."

"Awesome!" Sun exclaimed with entirely too much enthusiasm for the subject matter at hoof. "Think we'll be taking these books out again."
Twilight placed the record of the book out with a rare hesitation when dealing with knowledge. As soon as it was signed and stamped Sun and Blazed made their goodbyes and exited.

Sun spent most of dinner and the night going over the section of the book.
"Sun, we had better get some sleep. The trial is tomorrow."
"Oh yeah. Well, I got enough of it. Gotta clear my name first anyway."

Author's Note

Wonder if I could write (Or do much of anything really, at least anymore) when I'm not half-drunk. Oh well. Frankly, I think I'm doing pretty well on catching errors. A solid liter of my personal mix (Which is about 20-40% straight gin) would floor a lightweight, and I find that hilarious.

The original song lyrics are to "Freedom" by Alice Cooper. Not my best ponification, but I really like the Coop.

"Dry Equestria Act" shamelessly stolen from Pen Stroke, mastermind behind "A Drop of Moonshine" and "A Mug of Hard Cider"

Arrival/The Trial: Part Two

Arrival/The Trial: Part Two

Sun and Blaze woke from a rather light sleep, what was to come weighing heavily on their minds. Sun was sure of her innocence, but was far from used to being in court as anything other than a witness (A few times total, revolving around other accidents of less magnitude). Blaze was worrying about his likely evaluation after all this was over.

Hope I've been professional enough this week. If the guard saw it as me getting too personal it could hurt both our chances. he mused as he looked over at Sun and played back the past week in his head.

Knowing what's coming, Blaze pre-empted her this time and put a record on himself before starting. Not enough time for anything serious, but hay, it was practically his duty as a guard to keep up.

Who would be a poor one, beggarpony, a thief
If he had rich ponies in his hooves
And who would steal the candy from a laughing filly's mouth
If he could take it from the moneyed mares
Derp-eyed Marey goes jumping in again
Hoof-prints no contract, but always plays the game

"Not bad. Gettin' a taste for this stuff?" she smirked.
"Been a fan of the classics for some time, actually. Haven't much time though, so tell me when you're out of the bath."
"All business now huh?"
"We've the trial in a few hours Sun. Sorry if I'm not up for the usual tete a tete."
"But you got time to speak fancy?"
"Heh."

They arrived at the train station, saddlebags full of reports on Blaze and Sun holding the letter in her wing as she hoofed the tickets to the station attendant. The sight of a royal guard on a Canterlot-bound train wasn't explicitly unusual, so Sun was spared a good number of views, sans the ponies seated across the aisle.

A mint noblepony glared across at them. "So, what are your crimes, you ruffian?"
"Nothin'"
"That is what they all say."
"Like you did when you were busted with that Mexicolt pool stallion?"
"Why I never!"
"Sun, mind your muzzle. Now isn't the time for this."
"Oh, all right. Get this mess outta the way and then it's back to life."

The arrival at the Canterlot station was met by a second guard, fortunately not the one from before. Another unicorn in guard armor, but with an orange coat. "Sun Shower and Blaze Fire, correct?"

"Yes." Blaze said.
"Follow me."
The two boarded the cart and waited for the trip to the castle to be through. Sun kept quiet, knowing that causing any scene would only hurt her chances. She certainly wanted to say something to the ponies watching from the street though, and the glares she returned probably wouldn't have done her any favors if they'd been involved in the trial.

They disembarked at the gates. The new escort announced their arrival to a pair of guards at the castle gates, and the doors slowly opened. The waiting room hadn't changed a bit in the time, to nopony's surprise. Seeing Sun walk in with a guard in tow didn't offer any surprises either. Seeing him stay with her, however, did draw some looks as the clock ticked on. All the ponies in the room having their own problems, they kept quiet, aside from the desk worker occasionally shouting "Next!".

At her time Sun and Blaze entered the tremendous doors. The three judges, decrepit as ever, looked over the pages of the case. They nodded in tandem and stood to the side, announcing the princesses as before. The pair of rulers likewise took on their positions from a week ago. Luna maintained a greater degree of attention than before, clearly more interested in this case than before. Celestia kept a stoic expression, equally clearly displeased with having to command this sort of event.

"Sun Shower, do you understand why you have been summoned here today?"
Sun wanted quite badly to have a snarky reply to the most obvious question she'd ever heard. She forced out "Yes, Princess."
"And that is?"
"I stand accused of murder."
"Royal guard Blaze Fire, step forward." Celestia commanded. Blaze took a few steps ahead and looked slightly upward at the princess.
"Have the investigations been completed this time?"
"Yes, Princess Celestia."
"What evidence have you collected over the course of the investigation?"
Blaze produced a stack of papers. "Records from city hall and the Ponyville fire department regarding the night in question, as well as previous calls on other occasions..." He shuffles through them "And witness reports of Java Chip's mental state in the time leading to his death."
"Previous calls?"
"Yes, Princess. Java Chip's, um, projects were, according to the records, sometimes dangerous, and there have been a total of eight instances of the Ponyville Fire Department dispatching units, including the fatal night."

Luna chimed in (With all the "chime" of the great bell of Canterlot Cathedral) "And what of Java Chip's, as you put it, mental state?"
Blaze and Sun winced slightly at the echoing assault. Quickly recovering his composure, he answered "According to witnesses Twilight Sparkle of Ponyville and Zecora of Everfree Forest-"
Celestia interrupted "Twilight Sparkle was involved? Why was this kept from me?"

Virtually the only thing that can disturb Celestia, and they just stepped in it. Blaze considered his next words very carefully, or they were bucked. The gaze that followed Blaze's movements could only be matched by Nightmare Moon herself.

"Erm... peripherally, Princess. There were books labeled as property of the Ponyville Library, Twilight Sparkle's residence as you know, at the site of the accident. As to the lack of notice, I've seen first-hoof Ms. Sparkle's knowledge of Equestrian law. We are both aware of the standard procedure of non-disclosure during capital cases." Celestia's visage softened during the explanation, and Blaze finished with more confidence. "Ms. Sparkle noted during the interview and during the testing-"

"Testing, Blaze Fire?"

"-Yes, Princess. Of a substance found at the site. The results of the test are here as well as the interview with the producer. Well, former producer. During the interview Twilight reported that Java Chip was highly agitated and focused on subjects of electricity and magical theory, especially artifacts and gems.

Celestia seemed content with the answer, but retained an expression more serious than the beginning nonetheless. "We will require the witnesses to corroborate this story, Blaze Fire."

Blaze stared for a minute. He knew that if it was anypony besides Twilight Sparkle, the recordings on the parchments would be enough. Though this could be called an abuse of power to drag on the case, nopony said no to Celestia.

Sun kept a clear look of annoyance at the pronouncement, followed by a bow in tandem with her guard. As they turned around Celestia called out "We are not quite finished with this session." Both turned around with surprise at this.

"There is still the matter of the other charge."
"Other charge?!" Sun borderline shouted.
"Yes. During the previous arraignment. Obscenity before the courts. Of that you have been found guilty."

Sun's jaw dropped.

Celestia continued. "You are to be given a lesson in maintaining composure in a professional manner. Therefore, as the summons and arrangements for our witnesses are being processed, you are to spend the time - still in the company of Blaze Fire - training with the Equestrian military during the weekend drills. Blaze Fire, lead her to the barracks."

Author's Note

Original lyrics are "Cross-Eyed Mary" by Jethro Tull. I know, it's only a fraction. Just wait, there's a big one coming up. Yeah, I'm cheating by acting like the plural counts for rhymes, but where else was I gonna get a Derpy Hooves reference in?

Intermission: Witness

Intermission: Witness

At the library of Ponyville, Spike belched up a scroll. "Hey, Twilight!"
Twilight Sparkle looked up from the latest edition of Super Naturals (Now with credits to Zecora and Twilight for research responsible for most of the additions!).
"Message from the Princess!"
Twilight practically jumped from behind the desk and rushed over. She wasn't expecting anything from Celestia, and that meant it was time to panic. Snatching the scroll up in her magic and breaking the seal in one fluid motion, she began to read as Spike thanked his reflexes for keeping his claws in one piece.

Dear Twilight Sparkle,
I doubt you've forgotten about the royal guard Blaze Fire's visit recently. As soon as I was aware of his visiting you, I requested that you come to Canterlot via the train tickets enclosed with this letter. The date on said tickets will give you time to prepare. Bring the samples you have tested and give the remaining ticket to Zecora. I have questions for her as well.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia

Twilight lowered the magical grip on the parchment to under her muzzle. "Spike, I'm going to Canterlot. I'll need you to take care of things here, alright?" as she rolled the scroll up and placed it on a shelf filled with similar.

"Why?" the dragonling inquired.
"I don't know entirely, but it involves that guard that was here, and I need the samples I tested. And to bring Zecora with me." she said while levitating a saddlebag onto her back and cantering towards the basement. Spike barely made out the last part. A minute later the lavender mare returned. "I'm going to go see Zecora."

Twilight had gotten used to the unusual (By local standards) decor of the hut months ago. She calmly knocked on the door. The contrasting stripes, mohawk, and teal eyes peered thought the opening portal. "As previous guests, I was not expecting you. Welcome Twilight, what can I do for you too?"
Twilight looked pensive as the door finished its journey, revealing the whole zebra. "Um, I didn't expect this either." she pseudo-explained to the curous look from Zecora. "I just got a letter from Princess Celestia. She needs both of us at Canterlot early next week." She held the remaining ticket in her magic to view.
Zecora gently took the ticket from twilight and trotted towards the back. "This is troubling news indeed. What would cause the Princess to do such a deed?"
"I don't know Zecora. All I know is Celestia wants us both at Canterlot, and for me to bring the samples of what they found at Java Chip's house."
Zecora froze halfway through packing saddlebags. "I am surprised you do not see. So that is what is to be..." Her newly subdued demeanor worried Twilight.
"What do you mean Zecora?"
"It is best if you leave. I do not want cause to grieve."

Twilight stared for a minute, worry in her eyes as Zecora silently finished packing. The bags were finished with several small charms, the space on the wall behind them noting that they had not been removed from their place in a long time.

"The station at three. Do not worry about me."

Defeated, but trusting Zecora to show up at the proper time, Twilight silently left to ponder what she meant on the walk home.

Intermission: Trials and Tribulations

Intermission: Trials and Tribulations

The next day Twilight and Zecora were at the station, tickets punched and waiting for the 3 o'clock train to Canterlot. Zecora was still looking despondent, giving a blank stare in the direction of one of her charms held in a hoof.

The distant whistle grew close, then almost painfully loud as it came to a stop at the station. "Aaaall aboard! Crossroads Station to Canterlot Station! Have your tickets ready!"

They both showed the tickets, marked by the attendant for this ride, to the pony placed next to the door as they dragged their respective luggage behind them. Finding a booth seat at the very back of the passenger car, Twilight spoke up.

"I think it's about time you tell me what's going on Zecora. I can help, whatever's bothering you."

The zebra sighed, and replied without raising her muzzle from it's downward direction. "I have committed a crime most foul, to hear of it's details would make your soul howl."

Twilight was taken aback by the low, almost muttered utterance. Only from her extensive knowledge of linguistics and familiarity with Zecora's rhyming was she able to understand without asking for her to repeat herself. The meaning and intensity of the notion, however, escaped her. “W-What do you mean? What could be so heinous?”

Zecora looked to her side to be sure that nopony else had heard the first sentence before answering in a similar subdued tone. “I have committed Murder. I have led an innocent to slaugher.” Though it seemed impossible, her visage drooped even further. “Justice will be met for certain. I will also greet the final curtain.”

For the first time since Discord altered reality itself, Twilight had neither a question nor an answer. The pair retained silence and a somber look all the way to their destination station.

The arrival whistle to Canterlot station seemed to be a distant background noise, despite being about the third loudest sound in Equestria (Behind DJ-Pon3 and Luna's Royal Canterlot Voice, respectively). They silently disembarked to be greeted by a pair of royal guards.

"Miss Twilight Sparkle and Miss Zecora, if I am correct?" A powerfully-built unicorn inquired.
"Yes." Listlessly replied Twilight.
"We are here to escort you to the castle."
"Indeed." The guard had seen Twilight on a couple of occasions before, and was a little concerned over her now-mopey attitude. Business reigned, however, and he put the thoughts away.
"Follow us." as he took the lead, and the other guard the rear behind Zecora.

Unlike Sun Showers' crowd of neigh-sayers, many ponies recognized Twilight from her appearances both in the prescence of Celestia, and as the Element Bearer/savior figure to many. Not as many by far remembered Zecora. Strange and occasionally hostile looks inundated the rear of the procession, obviously presuming Twilight had caught some kind of criminal. Zecora kept her downcast countenance, believing these new rumors completely.

As the approached the grand entrance to the palatial palace, the crossed spears of the guardsponies took a vertical orientation, and the double doors opened.

Author's Note

How the hell did I miss accidentally copying part of the beginning onto the end? Fixed now, and going to add more to this one at a later point.

Intermission: Waiting for Celebrity

Intermission: Waiting for Celebrity

The massive double doors opened and shut behind them, showing it's doppelganger at the far end. The waiting room had, as is reasonable, no change whatsoever in the short time since Sun Shower's first trial. The only differences were most of the faces of the waiting accused, and a different pony working behind the desk. This younger mare retained freckles under a pale blue mane and over a tan coat. Upon seeing Twilight, she did what any responsible schedule-keeping unicorn would do.

She fangirled out on the spot.

A telekinetically-held pen hit the floor and papers in her immediate vicinity disorganized themselves slightly on the desk as she pushed the chair back in a jumping motion. “T-Twilight Sparkle!”

A majority of muzzles turned in the direction of the first bit of entertainment in hours. Reactions varied from noticeable interest to intensified fear regarding their own reasons for being there. The show continued with her galloping towards her quarry, stopping merely a foot from her muzzle.

“I-it's such an honor to meet you – I always wanted to meet the Princess' faithful student!” She takes Twilight's hoof into both of hers and gives an intense shake that would've been respectable to a farmpony. “There's so much I want to ask you! You know, I wanted to go to Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, but my family didn't have the money. It doesn't matter though, think I did pretty good for myself, right?” The starry-eyed stare continued as Twilight looked between her, Zecora, and the door.

Twilight collected herself just before needing her breathing exercises and began to answer. “Yes, of course. Always nice to meet a... fan. Before we start talking about our individual exploits, perhaps we can sign in?” The over-excited mare blinked a few times, realization sinking in.

“O-of course, Ms. Sparkle. Right this way!” as she practically dragged the protégé' with her to the desk where she picked up the pen and straightened her papers. Zecora plodded behind, reaching the desk a few seconds after the first two, even in such a short distance. Twilight calmly signed her name on the sheet in it's proper place and stepped aside, pen laid at the edge of the table for Zecora's signature. The zebra reluctantly took the writing instrument in her muzzle and signed in the place just below Twilight's. The mare of the mahogany noticed the attitude of Zecora and leaned in with a sneer.

“So that's why Twilight Sparkle's here. She caught you red-hoofed doing something? Don't deny it, zebra – the courts will deal with you and she'll-” Remaining words were suppressed when a small flare of magic lit up Twilight's horn.

“No. That's not why I'm here. You listen to me – We are here for reasons of our own, and if you keep throwing around accusations, it will mean your job. Understand?” The cold tone surprised both Zecora and Twilight's fan as the aura dissipated. By this time the guards were standing next to the group.

“What's the meaning of this interruption?” a stone-faced guard inquired while starting down the three.

Twilight answered without shifting her equally stoic gaze. “It seems the new employee has forgotten protocol four.” (Protocol four being the responsibility of the employee to reserve judgment regarding anypony brought in and process all petitioners equally). The guard gave a blank stare for a moment to try and remember what that exact rule was. Instead, he turned to the secretary and asked “And your rebuttal, miss Glossy Ink?”

Glossy looked sheepish for a moment, digging through memories to recall that exact rule herself. Once it hit her she looked outright nervous. “Um, yes sir.” Turning to Twilight “I'm very sorry Ms. Sparkle, I forgot my place for a moment.”

“I'm not the one to apologize to, Ms. Ink.”

Glossy turned her head to Zecora but didn't make eye contact. “I apologize Ms...” looking at the sheet “Zecora. It was unprofessional of me.”

Zecora's expression took on a slight edge of annoyance that faded after her reply. “I accept your apology, but please mind your job as it ought to be.” With that she returned to moping and took a nearby space against the wall.

“Seems that's settled, please excuse us officer.” as she took her place nearby.

The Trial: Part Three

The Trial: Part Three

After a half-hour or so, Twilight was met with Sun Showers, She looked at the pony quizzically as Sun stood proudly waiting, the slightest hint of a smile on her muzzle. Blaze Fire stationed himself near and slightly behind her.

"Next!" repeated itself four times as other ponies entered the immense portal to judgement. Each returned with a frown and a piece of paper - save one, who wore a massive smile and nigh skipped out the door. All three of them assumed that one was found innocent and didn't question the reaction to trial.

The proceeding "Next!" indicated their turn. The ponies calmly entered the courtroom.

The four proceeded to the aged judges, whom looked over the papers and repeated the previous motions of nodding and moving to the rear door, announcing the Princesses' entrance.

Having taken their places, Celestia and Luna began. Celestia started: "As per protocol of the courts, the new witnesses to this trial are to be sworn in. Twilight Sparkle, do you swear to tell truth in all matters before this court?"

"Yes, Princess Celestia." Twilight bowed. "But what is-"

Her mentor interrupted "That will be explained shortly." almost displaying a sadness at having to treat her student so cooly. "And Zecora, do you swear to tell truth in all matters before this court?"

Zecora gave a subdued, but clear enough reply. "An oath of truth I give as well. Only honesty is what I shall tell."

Celestia was slightly used to this, having heard of the rhyming zebra before. Luna displayed a very slight confusion, but decided not to question it at the moment.

Celestia continued after the assurances. "I remind Sun Showers and Blaze Fire that they are still under the previous oath. Is this understood?"

"Yes, Princess." they replied in near-unison.

"Very well. With that, we may return to the proceedings from their previous point. Twilight Sparkle and Zecora, you are both here for testimony regarding the fate of Java Chip, and will be requested and required to give said testimony when necessary. Before we begin the proceedings on this trial. Blaze Fire, report on the punishment regarding the charge of obscenity before the courts." Twilight and Zecora nearly blushed, if not for being slightly curious as to this charge they were unaware of.

"Your majesties, Sun Showers has completed her sentence quite satisfactorily regarding that charge."

"Understood. Are there any recommendations as to further punishment or remarks on her behavior during time of said sentence?"

"Yes, Princess."

Sun's eyes bugged out as she whipped her head to Blaze, fearful of what compounding this would bring. The diarchs themselves were slightly surprised as well, though showing no signs of it. "And what are your recommendations on this matter, Blaze Fire?"

"Princess, due to both the level of aptitude displayed during the enforced training and the mitigating circumstances -namely the stress of the situation with the previous escort - I suggest that the charges from this offense be expunged from the records."

Celestia blinked. "This is an unusual request. But, due to the previous situation, we shall take it into consideration."

Sun's eyes retained their unnatural size for a moment longer as it sunk in. He's sticking up for me... She regained her composure a moment later to finish the current trial, a slight smile playing across her muzzle before all facial aspects returned to their normal status.

"Now, we have during said time of punishment read the contents of these reports in their entirety. Twilight Sparkle, step forward." The lavender unicorn obliged as Celestia organized a few of the sheets, hoofing them to the bailiff, who in a short distance gave them to her. "Are these the results of the testing of the dust found at the scene?"

Twilight read thoroughly the papers given to her before looking up. "Yes Princess. These are the results of the tests done on the powder found at the scene."

"Do you have the sample of the product the courts requested?"

"Yes Princess. I have it with me here." she notes, levitating a bag in front of her, which was unceremoniously retrieved by the bailiff and placed on the podium.

"And what processes were used in the testing?"

The waterfall of information was understandable only to Celestia and her student, with Luna taking a close second due to studying scientific advances alongside popular culture and modern history. Blaze stood stoic, having given up paying specific attention to it shortly, and Sun growing confused quickly.

"I see. Zecora, step forward." as the zebra quietly obliged. "According to this, you were the producer of this substance, correct?"

"Correct, your majesty. Java's death is my responsibility."

Celestia and Luna looked at each other for a moment before returning to the shamaness. "You admit to the deed?"

"Yes, your majesty. All the fault is mine you can see."

"This is a highly unusual development. Zecora, explain what led to this act."

Her countenance dropped as she explained her place in this case. "A few years ago, I found my nights beginning to slow. That powder you hold, were the fruits of experiments bold. It aided focus for extended hours, that late work may have more power. A few trusted ponies this I have supplied, to help their long works for pride. Some have used much hence, and the stop was found to cause turbulence. Withdrawl causes a depression, which can harm one's profession. This warning was given to Mr. Chip, though he replied with a confident quip. 'I won't overuse it, merely when I need just a bit.' But over time he would use more, which caused me thoughts sore. Finally one day, and experiment went the wrong way. I eventually cut off his supply, though for more he would cry. I ordered rest and recuperation, but he asked for a single bout of experimentation. This I allowed, but did not expect what followed. His final invention he used, to create the explosion that ensued. His end a sick story's plot, because of that product I had wrought. So you see your majesty, how the fault lies alone with me." She finished be sobbing softly, never daring to raise her muzzle.

"I see..." the solar diarch mused. "Are there any more instances of evidence regarding this event, or pertaining to the trial in any way?" After a minute of silence, she announced "Then we shall deliberate. Wait here for our judgement. Bailiff, it is late. Send the remaining petitioners away for the night, arrange lodging as needed." With that, they placed a magical warding eye to monitor the room as they retreated to another room.

Twilight almost immediately followed the door's closing by turning to Zecora. "It's not your fault! You warned him, so why blame yourself?"

"The warning was not early enough, much sooner should I have gotten tough." as she fell to her haunches, awaiting an (In her mind) inevitable fate. Twilight kneeled next to her, with futile efforts of comfort. Blaze watched, ready to aid the witnesses if needed. Sun stared, dumbfounded at this turn of events but unable to help out of both not knowing this story before, and too paranoid of implicating herself somehow.

Two agonizing hours of waiting passed, as Zecora ran out of tears and they all ran out of time. The alicorns returned from the rear, and took their positions.

Verdict/Vacation

Celestia and Luna nodded to each other, and began.

"Sun Showers, in light of this evidence brought before us today." Luna finished for her, as Celestia took a deep breath, as if attempting to dispel the misery permeating the room.

"Thou has been found by this high court.... Not guilty of the murder of Java Chip."

A very relieved breath left Sun Showers, not realizing she'd been holding it.

"In addition to this, and under consideration of guard Blaze Fire's request, the charge of obscenity before the court has been expunged from the records."

She visibly smiled at the twofold bits of very good news. It faded instantly when, in the course of looking at the others, she saw Zecora.

Luna's face fell when she turned to Zecora. "Zecora of the Everfree Forest, this is troubling news that has been brought before the court. Indeed, the majority of our deliberation was concerning your fate."

Zecora bowed right to the ground. "I see my place in history's black spot, and am ready for my death and rot..."

Celestia finished for Luna this time. "Not guilty."

Zecora looked up with enough haste to pop her neck, obviously surprised at the verdict. "But what of Java's death? Of right my conscience is bereft!"

Celestia gave a serene, if sad, smile at the zebra. "You have warned him, and his fate was his choice, sad as it may be. However..."

Zecora looked on for the caveat.

"This creation of yours is still dangerous. You are to immediately stop production, until such time as it can be rendered safer. Do you understand?" a short nod. "Twilight, I - not the court, but I as your mentor - request that you watch over Zecora until she feels better about all this. We don't need another tragedy. Do you agree?"

"Y-yes Princess!" Twilight nearly yelled, both relieved at the verdict and that Celestia was holding her in such high esteem as to charge her with the life of another. She always was obsessively willing to please her teacher.

Celestia turned to Luna once more. "And with that said-"

Luna boomed over the room (And all adjoining ones) "Court is adjourned!"

The two pairs began to leave the courtroom, Zecora so drained she was leaning on Twilight for support.

Sun looked at Blaze and smiled, as they both began to exit. "Guard Blaze Fire and Sun Showers" Snapped them both to attention. Celestia looked down at them from in front of the podium this time. "Due to this unusual trial, I will take a page from the Fire Department's book, so to speak" she held the remaining papers in her telekinetic grasp to make the point. "Blaze Fire, take the next week off. With pay." With that, and a slight smirk, she left the room, for the three regular attendants of law to finally resume their places.

The two pegasi exited the courtroom triumphant, passing the waiting room and finally rejoicing in the free light of the outside.

Sun turned to Blaze. "Thanks for puttin' up with me, and giving me a chance in there."

"Think nothing of it Sun Showers. It was my job, after all. Now I just have to decide where to spend this little vacation."

"Ever been to Cloudsdale? Nice place. Haven't been there in a while though."

Blaze thinks for a moment. "Yes, that's a good idea. I haven't been there in years either, since I moved."

"You used to live in Cloudsdale too?"

"Yes. Family's moved away from there too, but it would be interesting to see."

"Great! I'll see ya there!" Sun said as she flew away.

"Sure, I'll see you-..." Thirty seconds later and a near audible *click* came from his brain. "Did I just agree to a date?"

A week later, Sun is fixing breakfast at home, with an added guest of Blaze Fire. "Good thing one of the guys at the firehouse still owed me over poker night, or that week couldn'tve happened, heh. And we avoided all that crazy stuff that happened here."

Blaze smiled and nuzzled his new marefriend. "Yeah. Too bad we have to get back to work after this."

"Maybe." she smirked. "But nothin's keepin' us from visiting each other. No use stopping now." as she nuzzled back.

The mailmare came right on cue with the paper. She gave a smile and a knowing wink (Sort of) to the pair before flying off. "Good, this' the paper that'll have my being found not guilty in it. This'll shut up the rest of them still giving me trouble."

She unfolded the paper, eagerly finding the declaration on the front page of her innocence. If it was there.

TWILIGHT SPARKLE BECOMES ALICORN - NEW PRINCESS CORONATION

The response soundly replace the number two in terms of loudest volume on record.

"BUCK"

The Challenge

Sun went home to get some much deserved rest after work, having taken care of a small fire in the building next to Sugarcube Corner (Which building the source lied at was still under investigation). She was in a particularly bright mood, to nopony's surprise. The rather unnerving smile that played across her muzzle from time to time, however, gave her coworkers pause. After a minute most of them wrote it off to memories of the verdict, presuming it one of those things that they couldn't understand without experiencing it. They were partially right.

In the usual amount of junk mail for this day, one was off. It was of a particularly fancy, sturdy type of paper, usually reserved for legal documents that needed storage for a long time (There was a drawer full of them from investigations at the firehouse, stretching back about a decade at least). More unusual, the clasp appeared to be pure silver, and bore the image of a crescent moon. Sun opened it without delay. The parchment therein would've been a surprise if the container didn't give it away.

Sun Showers of Ponyville,

It has come to my attention that you seek a duel of honor, and have requested I to oversee it, as per the laws set forth over a millennium ago. Indeed my sister Princess Celestia was quite surprised at this turn of events. After confirmation of the status of the law in modern Equestrian society, I assent to the position of judge in this matter. Return the envelope forthwith containing the name of yourself and the challenger, and the time, location, and date. Re-seal it, and press the royal symbol upon the clasp. This will return it to me in the most expedient way.

Princess Luna of Equestria

Sun Showers packed it into her saddlebags, along with a pen and protective hoofcover from her firefighting uniform. Now she just had to get the bastard's name. Without a name, number, or address, there was only one way to find him.

Off to the bar. it was the last week before it was back to the regular rotation of "on call". Sun sauntered into the old watering hole with purpose. Swinging open the door somewhat dramatically, she scanned the crowd. "Hey Sun. The usual?"

"You got it. Hey, you know the name of that guy who was on my flank last time?"

"Yes... But all due respect, after everything that's happened I can't assume the best."

"No worries, it's nothin' illegal, heh." she assured with a smirk that did anything but.

"Can't just go giving out information you know. He's over there though. You understand that I'll be watching. Recommend you leave well enough alone." The last part was completely lost as Sun trotted over to the corner and the bartender readied to get the bouncer.

The cerulean-maned pony was slumped over a table in the corner. He looked up at the enroaching shadow to see Sun. "Huh? Oh, you. Get lost before the bouncer does it for you."

Sun smirked. "Good, you're not completely shitfaced this time. This won't take long. What's your name?"

"The tartarus you wanna know my name for?" He snarled back.

Thinking back to what the book said, she knew that any false pretenses would only end against her - and that was before factoring in that it was considered an insult to the princesses to run royalty on what amounted to a fool's errand. "I'm going to challenge you to a duel." she responded.

"Duel?... Heh. Heheh. Hehahahaha!" The derisive laughter rang out across the bar as patrons started to watch the unusual event. "Yeah, sure. Name's Blue Beet." He twisted his head toward his cutie mark of the same.

Sun pulled out the paper and wrote his name next to hers. "And what time and place for the duel?"

*Snort* "Town square, noon tomorrow. You done bothering me?"

She wrote that down as well, and placed it into the silver-clasped envelope. That caught Beet's eye. "Almost. Jus' one more thing." She pulled the hoofcover out of her bags.

*WHOMP*

"What the buck was that for? Bouncer!" The bouncer trotted up behind them.

"Why did you go and do that Sun? You know the rules. To top it off you told the bartender you weren't going to do anything like this."

Sun looked at the bouncer. "I said I wasn't going to do anything illegal, and I didn't. This is how you challenge someone to a duel." She put the cover back in her saddlebag. "Watch." She pounded her hoof on the emblem. It began to glow and seemingly disintegrated into silver-blue particles that shot out the window, much like how Spike's letters do with the fire.

"I'll see ya tomorrow in the square. Don't be late - it'll piss off princess Luna." She turned and exited the bar to the dumbfounded stares.

Ancient Laws: Part Three/The Duel: Part One

Ancient Laws: Part Three/The Duel: Part One

Sun and Blaze mused at the table over breakfast about what was going to happen in no more than a few hours.

“You're really going to do this?” Blaze inquired.
“Of course. Bastard set me up and it took weeks to get it sorted out. Some ponies still look at me funny. Wouldn't you if you were in my spot?”
“I suppose so...”
“Now then. Lessee here...” as Sun got up and began sifting through her record collection. She pulled out 3 albums and balanced them and the player on her back, along with the page of genealogy Twilight provided. “No time to waste, let's get goin'.”

“What are those for?”
“Duel needs proper music, yeah?”

Blaze decided not to question her motives on this – today was going to be unusual enough as it is.

Word spread quickly in this town for normal matters. For the first duel in at least everypony's lifetime (Sans perhaps Granny Smith), everyone in town knew within hours. Nearly the entire population of Ponyville ringed the fountain, waiting for the events to unfold.

Sun expected as much as she sauntered to the location at about 11 am. She placed the record player and albums on the edge of the ring of ponies and stood near the center, waiting.

As the minutes ticked by, everypony waited with baited breath. 15 till the hour a chariot appeared on the horizon. A cadre of batponies harnessed to their load. It swept the crowd-ring twice, and landed on the southern edge. Everypony there backed off as Princess Luna stepped out. She was in full regalia usually reserved for diplomatic visits of neighboring royalty. These items haven't been used for this purpose in over a thousand years. She faced the center of the ring, and announced her presence to the town.

”My little ponies, my subjects. We are here today to witness a duel of honor between Sun Showers and Blue Beet. Duelists, present thyselves!”

Sun proudly stepped forward, puffing up her barrel and announcing “Sun Showers, your highness!”

They waited. Small murmurs raised a background noise as ponies took note at the absence of Blue. Luna traced the crowd with here eyes before continuing.

“Blue Beet. Present thyself.”

Nopony stepped forward. Luna quickly grew agitated. ”Find Blue Beet at once! He must present himself before the arbiter for proceedings to begin.”

The batpony guards quickly flew off in cardinal directions to comb the town. Five after noon the eastbound guard came with Blue in tow.

“What the buck is going on?!” he cried as he was dropped from two feet off the ground in front on Luna. “Who's responsible for this travesty?”

”I am”

“What do you mean you are, who the tartarus do you think you......” Beet trailed off as he finally looked up and saw the princess glaring down.

”You were to present yourself at precisely noon today at this location, Blue Beet.”

“Wh-wha? But she couldn't have been...” he looked at Luna for a moment before a smirk played across his muzzle. “What do you mean, dear princess? I was told nothing of this event.”

Luna looked at him with suspicion, but tradition dictated that she verify. ”Sun Showers and Blue Beet. The laws demand that both are aware of the nature of this proceeding. Bring forth proof of the arrangement immediately!”

Sun would have been worried, if not the entire town had shown up. She turned to the crowd and shouted. “Everypony who was at the Charred Barrel the night I challenged him, step forward now, by order of Princess Luna!” Being only noon, the bartender was among the dozen ponies not content to keep at their places of work on this unusual day. Blue's face went shades that only Fluttershy could muster most of the time. The witness ponies bowed before the princess.

”You are witnesses to the challenge?”

They responded in tandem, though not in complete synchronicity. “We are, uh, Princess Luna, your majesty.”

”What occurred on the night in question?”

They explained from their respective angles, though the stories did all mention Sun specifically stating that it was for a duel.

Luna stared down Blue. ”These witnesses attest to your knowledge on this matter. Their number is more than necessary to determine you are aware of the event. All ponies not involved in the duel return to your places outside of the determined ring. Sun Showers and Blue Beet, stand before me.”

Sun again placed herself proudly before Luna, while Blue worriedly stepped up beside her. “But...I didn't know she was serious! This is ludicrous!”

”The challenge has been made, as per the laws set forth. Do you accept, or do you rescind competition and forfeit to the demands of Sun Showers?”

“Uh..” as he turns to Sun. “What were you trying for?”

“You tried to ruin me, so I'm gonna return the favor. All your money, and a public apology for whatcha did.”

“I-I can't do that!”

“Then you accept, or you do it.”

“.......Fine. If I must beat a mare to get out of this.” he spat.

”Now then, proffer evidence of your station that I may officiate.”

Blue Beet gave a wicked smile, thinking that this would be over before it began. “Nothing more than some lowborn. You're the one that has to back down.” Sun produced the genealogy page Twilight created when testing the spell and hoofed it to Luna. She announced loudly and proudly “I, Sun Showers, am a descendant of Duchess Windspear of what is now Cloudsdale, according to the title granted to her by Princess Celestia.” To Blue's surprise and horror.

Luna traced the familial lines to her name, recognizing both the translation of titles and the magical signature of Twilight. ”This suffices as proof of thy ancestry. And Blue Beet, dost thou have ancestry commensurate with Sun Showers?”

“Um...”

“Don't try to give us that shit again. Witnesses!”

“Fine! *sigh* Yes, I'm related to Prince Blueblood.”

”And that neither of the combatants have previous instances of moral turpitude?”

“Wait, you were gone for a while, didn't you get convicted of something?” Blue stared at Sun, but now beyond the hopes of smiling.

“The records of anything were expunged. For all legal purposes, I haven't got a record.” Sun sneered at him.

Sun's smug look contrasted Blue's angry sneer as Luna declared ”Then all measures are in place, and according to the laws this will be a legal duel between these two parties.”

The Duel: Part Two

The Duel: Part Two

The crowd clopped it's applause on the ring for five full minutes, until Luna silenced them with an upraised hoof.

”As per the ancient rules set forth, the combatants will now decide upon specific rules of the engagement.”

Blue Beet sneered at Sun Showers. “No flying”

Sun sneered back. “Agreed.” To Blue and the crowd's surprise. “I pick the music, which Blaze Fire will handle. No one. You, or anypony else, messes with it.”

Blue was slightly taken aback by the unusual request. “Erm... Agreed.” The crowd murmured confusion at this seemingly one-sided tradeoff. Luna remained stoic outwardly. Hmm, she is taking a tactical stance for this battle. We are curious as to it's purpose.

”Are there any additional rules you wish to consider?”

In tandem; without breaking eye contact, they replied. “No, your highness.”

Luna's horn glowed as a searing beam traced its way around the ring, causing many in the front of the crowd to jump back. A vivid blue border faintly glowed, creating an official ring for the match. Slight reflections of the light shows that it was a shield roughly triple the height of Luna. A few crowd ponies tentatively tapped at the force field, and all realized it's purpose as protection both for the crowd and to prevent interference.

”The rules have been agreed upon and the barrier is in place. Combatants...” As she flew towards the top of the force field, leveling her wing-beats to maintain her position. “Allez lutte!”

Both contestants knew that, despite it being in an ancient dialect of Equus, it was the call to begin.

Without breaking her view away, Sun shouted “Blaze! Black Festival and bucking crank it!”. The call stifled the reaction time needed for Blue Beet's surprising first assault. She lunged to the side, but still took a half-hoof's scrape across the muzzle. He pressed on, each blow being sufficiently deflected. He had more earth pony in him than her, and more potential strength. Sun, however, actually worked and knew how to use it. As the record scratch became the intro, the music flooded the ring. A heavy drum followed by a deep, grinding riff. As she started hearing the music, it became like the ultimate workout. A nasty gleam reflected off her eyes as she began to go on the offensive.

I AM IRON MARE

The base and volume could be felt at their hooves. Blocking a blow with her right hoof, the left sent a cross that left Blue with a surprised expression and a busted lip.

Has she lost her mind
Can she see or is she blind
Can she trot at all
Or if she moves will she fall

Luna was largely unfamiliar with this particular style of music, but she surmised its purpose quickly. She's losing herself to the raw energy oh this piece. Reminds us of Neightoven's frenzied playing. All those broken instruments of quality. It nearly caused a riot that night. Meanwhile Blue was on the defensive now, successfully blocking most blows, but wincing at each strike.

She was turned to steel
In the great magical field
Where she traveled time
Future's lost for pony kind

Blue recovered from the shock and need to be on the defensive. He started flailing wildly. This proved mostly fruitless, as the indirect strikes were often countered.

Now the time is here
for iron mare to spread fear
Vengeance from the grave
Killed ponies she could've save

The future bruises piled up as the song went on. Blue was growing furious and attempted to think of a way to win as he backed off, creating space between the two.

Horseshoes of lead
fills her victims full of dread
Galloping fast as they can
Iron mare lives again

As the outro lingers Sun revved up her wings similar to Scootaloo's method of propulsion. The burst of speed cleared the distance and ended with a massive uppercut. Blue flew backwards, slamming into the shield around the viewers and falling to the ground. Sun's wings snapped shut after the blow, and she skidded to a stop after hitting the ground.

“H-Hold on! No flying, you broke the rules!” He declared through a half-smile, half-grimace of pain. Both stalled as Luna lowered her position, though still flying over both their heads. Luna paused a moment, thinking on it as the pair breathed heavily, attempting to recover as much energy as possible during the brief lull. A minute later, Luna declared her judgment. ”The rule agreed upon specifically stated flight. Her wings were used for propulsion, but it was not by their use that she left the ground. Therefore, we shall allow it.” Luna regained her former higher position as Sun smirked and Blue glared daggers. Not wanting to waste another opportunity, Sun charged again while screaming “Blaze, Reanimate!” Blaze pulled an album sleeve of a dreadlocked pony and placed it on the record player. Sounds similar to a mare in estrus emerged, shortly followed by the vicious riffs of the music.

Yeah I am the astro-creep
A tartarus-styled war equestria's freak
Yeah I am the trotting dead
a nightmare in the box shadow in your head

Sun connected with a headbutt that drove Blue back into the magical wall, using her forehooves to push herself back as he slid to the ground.

More pony than pony
More pony than pony
More pony than pony
More pony than pony
More pony than pony
More pony than pony

It finally clicked to Blue that Sun wasn't going to play around. If he wanted to walk away from this, he needed to be at least as dirty. He kept his distance, waiting for the next charge.

But not victimize
Read the motherbucker psycoholic lines yeah
into a magic war
I tear your soul apart then I eat it some more yeah

He didn't have to wait long. Sun blazed her path, only for Blue to rush forward and slide himself under her hooves. And upward thrust of his rear hooves sent her flying into the wall.

Yeah I am the ripper man
A locomotion mind love equestrian style yeah
I am the nexus one
I want your life bucker I ain't done yet

Blue took the opportunity to pounce on her, keeping his rear hooves anchoring her front as he began to rain down punches. Blaze looked on, unable as any other pony to change the direction the fight had gone. Sun looked at him for a moment and resumed struggling. Blaze notice the lack of music and grabbed the next album on the top of the small pile.

Alright
we are scanning the scene in the city tonight
we are looking for you to start up a fight
there is an evil feeling in our brains
but it is nothing now you know it drives us insane

Sun finally shot her rear hooves up far enough to unseat Blue, escaping to the middle of the ring for the next assault. She readied to launch herself again, being mindful of what happened last time. Blue kept a low stance only to jump before contact. He bucked hard as she passed by. A sickening *crack* echoed through the air, as loudly as the music. Sun stumbled and slid in the dirt. Glancing to the side, she saw bone protruding from the first joint.

Galloping
On our way hiding
Ponies pay dying
One thousand deaths
Galloping
On our way hiding
Ponies pay dying
One thousand deaths

Matters of honor or justice were gone. Sun was blinded with rage as the sounds of the crowd and the music faded. She charged again, juking to the left, and using her remaining wing to propel a massive hook, completely unaware of the primal scream that accompanied it. A resounding crack noted that Blue's jaw was shattered. The small cracks formed in Sun's hoof weren't felt.

Searching seek and destroy
Searching seek and destroy
Searching seek and destroy

She slammed both forehooves into his chest, knocking all remaining breath out of him. She reared up and repeated the two-hooved crush, lost to rage and adrenaline of the fight. Tried to bucking ruin me!

Searching

Everything I went through!

*THUD*

Seek and

I'll

*CRUNCH*

DESTROY

You!

*SQUELCH*

A smaller shield separated the pair. Luna descended to ground level as Sun beat on the barrier.

”It is done. This match is concluded!”

Sun slowed down and shortly stopped to look up at the princess, followed by her own bloodied hooves, and the unmoving form of Blue Beet. There was no doubt about the idea of saving him. He was dead.

Author's Note

Hopefully this is as epic as the wait demands. I did ponify all the lyrics at first, but putting them all here broke the flow with too much music. The songs are (Of course): Black Sabbath "Iron Man", Metallica "Seek and Destroy", and White Zombie "More Human Than Human".

Aftermath/Ancient Laws: Part Four

Aftermath/Ancient Laws: Part Four

Sun Showers stood stunned as the haze of battle finished clearing away from her mind. The ambulance arrived in record time (If only because they had one ready for such an unusual event), and Blue was loaded in to the cart on a stretcher. Sun shakily stepped onto another while the first sped away.

Luna and a night guard met them at the hospital, one having teleported and the other being stationed here with the expectation of injuries. The remaining guards caught up with the second ambulance, chariot in tow. They parked it and unhitched themselves just as Sun exited the secondary vehicle and trotted in, flanked on either side by the hospital pony and guard respectively. She nervously followed the guard and doctor into a small room.

“This should dull the pain, but brace yourself anyway. It will sting when we set the bone.” said the nurse as she hoofed Sun a vial. Sun slugged it down in a shot and waited for a minute. She nodded when a dull, pins-and-needles feeling took hold, and closed her eyes.

*Snappop*

She shuddered at the feeling. Sure she'd on rare occasions broken bones in the line of work, but she never did like the setting process. She watched with detached interest as they bandaged the set wing, mind flying as to her fate. You bucked up this time. Like, bucked up bad. Soon as we're done they'll cart me away.

Soon after the setting, Luna came in, with guards in tow. What wasn't expected was Celestia behind her as well.

Sun looked up with surprise. Knew I was gonna pay for this, but both of them I probably won't make it outta here. Only ludicrous nature of the situation kept her from just freaking out.

Redheart approached the princesses, bowing low. “Princesses Celestia and Luna?” As both turned to her.

”How does the other combatant fare?”

Redheart looked nervous and very meekly said “P-please princess Luna. There are patients resting in nearby rooms. I, um, humbly request you keep the volume down.”

Luna paused for a moment, regaining her modern composure after the ancient event. “How is Blue Beet?”

Redheart sighed. “Gone, your majesty. His ribcage was shattered and the bone fragments perforated both his lungs and heart. He bled out before arrival.”

Celestia sighed. “Sorry to hear this, my little pony. We will dispatch guards to deliver the news to his family.” She turned towards a guard on her other side. “Place Sun Showers under arrest.”

Luna stepped in front of the day guard, blocking the entrance. “Nay, sister.”

Celestia, Redheart, the day guards, and Sun all let out a confused “What?”

“We have both perused the laws, and they remained unchanged. Death is unwanted, but not a completely unexpected event in duels. By accepting the terms of combat, both parties took responsibility of their own lives in the process.” She turned to a batpony. “According to the terms of the duel, Sun Showers is to inherit the non-familial assets of the Beet house, after final expenses are accounted for.” The night guard solemnly nodded and flew off to join the messenger to the family of the departed.

“Luna! A pony died from this! Justice must be taken.”

“Sister, justice was meted out. The laws are clear on this.”

Celestia hung her head for a moment. “As much as I would like any other outcome, you are correct. But know that I will fight to remove duels from Equestria now. This must never come to pass again.”

Luna thought on her sister's words. “True. I will not contest your call to remove duels. But know that all this has occurred at such a time as it was legal. Therefore Sun Showers is free, and entitled to the spoils.”

They both looked at Sun, who was bowing prostrate, the bound wing being the only part that was not as low as physically possible.

Luna stepped forward. “Rise, Sun Showers. According to the... current law you have done no wrong. The spoils of the duel will arrive in due time. Guards, escort the victor to her domicile.”

Getting Away With Murder

It had been a week since the duel. A guard arrived with a package. Sun had seen stoic faces of guards from the palace, but this had the cast of ponies giving testimony after a fire. He didn't want to be here, and it showed.

He cleared his throat. “By order of Princess Luna, pursuant to the agreed-upon conditions of the duel between yourself and Blue Beet on 21st Marech, the remaining non-familial assets are awarded as spoils of victory.” He hoofed the package to her and made an abrupt about-face, trotting away before she could mutter a half-hearted “Thanks.”

Sun stepped out of her apartment to collect letters that had piled near the mail slot, most of them trod-upon and wrinkled. Some bore traces of paint splatters – the paint used to scrawl “MURDERER” and varying obscenities on the door and adjoining wall. She gave up cleaning it after three days of finding new ones every morning.

The newspaper made front page of the duel, and subsequently the official abolishment of the practice, with nopony dissenting on the motion. The opinion was nothing but calls for justice, so she tossed it aside after the first article calling for her head.

She entered the abode and locked the door. Opening the box, she found a bag of bits and an accounting ledger. Blue Beet didn't live beyond his means, but he was damn close. The haul amounted to about six months' rent, no more. The ledger detailed the hospital and burial expenses. The family had spent as much as possible on it, knowing where the rest was going. She couldn't blame them. Placing the bag on the table, she hoofed through the pile of letters. Dozens of pieces of hate mail and threats was all she'd gotten this week. Discarding any name she didn't recognize pared down the pile quickly. One, however, was from Blaze. She hadn't seen him since the duel, and opened it without delay.

Sun,

I'm sorry. While the law allows me to stay with you, my conscience cannot. Goodbye.

-Guard Blaze Fire

Tears pattered on the page, streaking patches of inked words. She wordlessly put it down and went to the fridge. Retrieving a bottle of whiskey, she tossed the cap aside and drank. The bottle was halfway gone before she took a moment to breathe.

Sitting on the floor, nursing the bottle, one set of thoughts played across her mind. Every crude joke she'd made on the subject, every fantasy of getting rid of that one flankhole that everypony's had at once point or another, and she did it. Not only that, she'd gotten away with it. In a roundabout way, Blue Beet was right about the charges. He just had the wrong victim.

It was a bucking accident, everypony knows that!

For what it was worth to the world, she was the last to ever do it legally in Equestria. Sun showers had gotten away with killing another pony. She glanced over at her work gear. It had begun to get grimy from not being properly cleaned. After the shock wore off from the event she attempted to get on with her life. But vicious stares were the least of it. Ponies would come up with every conceivable (And inconceivable) excuse to not deal with her. Most had never seen a violent death, and some primal fear had taken hold of the populace. When ponies realized that she wasn't a threat, they went on the offensive. Sun found hostility wherever she went.

But Sun refused to run. Stubborn pride kept her in Ponyville. She took another swig of the bottle. It'll get better, right?

Revelation of Accusation/Ancient Laws: Part Two

Revelation of Accusation/Ancient Laws: Part Two

The killer's breed or Sombra's seed
The glamor, the fortune, the pain
Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain
Don't ask for friendship anymore

Two minutes to midnight
The hooves that threaten doom
Two minutes to midnight
To see the nightmare since the womb~

Back to life as we know it. Sun's routine continues, albeit with the knowledge that somepony else is part of it. She smiles as she goes through her exercises.

On to the firehouse. “How's it goin' Sun?”

“Damn good, heh” she gleefully intoned. “Now that that's all done with, time to get back to life.”

The day went slowly. Almost too slowly, given what the last few weeks were filled with. Who'd have thought she'd miss the sort of excitement that came with being accuse of murder? She was still on pseudo-light duty, being spared from being on call for a few more days. Even more fortunately, the gang had piled together a small congratulatory sum. It wasn't a huge amount, but it filled her larders and ensured she wasn't getting evicted. Everything was as it was.

That night it was to be a bit of a celebration at the bar. Sure, she didn't need to trawl for a stallion anymore, but it was still fun. Just hanging around some friends and shooting the breeze.

Only one pony seemed to not be having fun. Slumped over the bar and blind stinking drunk sat a colt, on his ninth hard mix. He kept glancing over at Sun, bitterness clear on his muzzle. After slamming the final drink (And subsequently falling out of his stool and picking himself up) he staggered to her position on the bar.

“Yu-you!”

“Hm?” Sun turned inquisitively. With a smile ill-fitting to the scene, she added “Sorry, got somepony. Good luck to ya though.”

*SMACK*

The bar froze as eyes turned to the drunk and his victim.

“You..*urgh* You bitch! Yer suppos'd to be in jail! Unc-uncle Bluezblood said he was gunna take-take care of yas...” Followed by unceremonious unconsciousness.

“Take care of.... You piece of shit! You set all this up!?” She bellowed, holding up his head with a hoof. “I oughta-”

“Woah there Sun. No use actually doing something here. That means trouble for both of us.” The bartender stared on to the scene as much as any of the patrons.

Sun releases her grip and drops the bits for the last drink on the counter. “Yeah, you're right. Lil' bastard's got enough problems as it is.” as she left, her hooves hitting the floor perhaps just a bit harder than they had to.

After everything Sun Showers has been through, a grudge would be an understatement. After a solid half-hour of ranting and yelling in her home (Stopped only by being reminded via a knock on the door that she had neighbors), she started to plot. She thought on the matter for some time, and was up half the night before a thought struck her.

Nah, that'd get me arrested all over again. Looks like it's just down to getting him arrested for all that shit. Too bad, you'd think there'd be a better way. Like there used to... Used to?

“But.... The laws of duels haven't been touched. Just ignored since nopony uses them. Very few laws are actively removed due to disuse."

A smile that can be easily described as 'wicked' crept across her muzzle.

Looks like I'm going back to the library tomorrow.

Right after work she found herself at the door to the library before even taking a post-work shower. If Spike's dragon nose could tell, he was doing a good enough job of hiding it. "Welcome to-oh! Good to hear about the trial ending well."

"Surprised you'd heard anything about it, what with your boss gettin' to be a princess all of a sudden. Where'd she go anyway?"

"She's still here. Twilight! Guests!" and sure enough, the former librarian-turned-princess came down the stairway.

Sun displayed a bit of surprise. It would have been more, but after everything that's happened (And being around to see various other crises that hit Ponyville) it wasn't the reaction somepony from out of town would give. "You're still here? Thought they'd give you a kingdom or somethin'"

"Oh, I'm still here. It's really more title than station. Though I have a checklist here of possible outcomes and future requirements..." as she held a list in her magic. One that if unrolled completely could paper the walls.

Spike gave a theatrical cough aimed at Twilight, and she transported the list out of sight. "Yes. What are you looking for today?" she asked with a bit of embarrassment.

"Need the books on old laws again."

"Oh my. Did something else happen?"

"About to, heh."

A single, large tome floated out from it's position on the comically oversized "E" section of a shelf and laid itself out on the table. Sun quickly hoofed through it until reaching duels. Sun muttered aloud reading the requirements.

"Hoofcover slap regular way to challenge, can use my work gear for that...Public venue for witnesses" A smirk as she continues reading.
"No...moral failings?" she looked at Twilight, intending the reading as a question.

"Modern interpretations decided that it means 'no criminal record'"

"OK, I'm good then. Pur-purview of royalty? Whassis?"

Twilight looked over the passes she held a hoof under. "That duels were only for royalty at the time. Since it hasn't been used it's still a requirement."

"Well, buck." *Looks at Spike, who wore that silly grin when youth heard something they weren't supposed to* "Sorry. So what am I gonna do now?"

"You could get your family history studied."

"How do I do that?"

"Fortunately I've been working on a spell to do just that. Originally it was for Applejack to find who came before Granny Smith, but I could test it out here."

"Yeah, fire it up!"

"Well, alright. It's still untested, so make sure to tell me if any unpleasant side-effects arise from the casting." Twilight opened a book with blank pages and laid it on the table. She concentrated on it as her horn glowed it's trademark color. The haze enveloped the book as she turned to Sun. The stream of energy held Twilight, Sun, and the book as the glow from her horn increased. Sun felt a tingling throughout her body as the book autonomously etched her name into the bottom of the page. Small lines linked it to two names above it - her parents. It continued to branch out as the tingling intensified. A few minutes passed as the page filled with generation upon generation. As soon as the casting finished Sun hit the ground.

"Oh my! Are you alright?" Twilight stood over Sun, holding out a hoof.

"Buuh?" Shaking her head, Sun got up. "Yeah. Felt funny for a bit, but kinda shocked when it finished."

"Hmmm. It needs far more testing then. That would likely be too harsh for Granny Smith to take. Can't risk it then..." Twilight scratched out a line on an entirely new checklist. "Sure you're alright?"

"Yeah, fine now. So what's it say?" As she stepped quickly to the book. It now showed a genealogy from her to her ancestors, leading back hundreds of years. Most of it she didn't care about at the moment. Small traces of color adorned each name. "So how can I tell which is which?"

Twilight looked over the page with Sun. "These color-coding are based on several factors. The red tint is for earth ponies. Seems you have more earth in your lineage than a typical pegasus - that helps explain your size and stamina..."

"Hey, I work out a lot to keep this!"

"That's a very big part of it too, but this doesn't hurt. Now where were we...ah, yes. The blue is from pegasus family, which is most of them, as expected. Ponies do have a tendency to stay within their own. The Yellow is unicorn. Only a couple of them in here, also not surprising.."

Sun pointed a hoof near the top "What's this one for? Windspear is in blue and silver."

Twilight studied the color. "Yes. Silver is for titles, and gold would be for blood relations." She took a book named "Pegasi of Historical Note in Equestria: 300-600 AB" which was filed under "Equestria, Pegasi history therein" under E. "It should be within roughly this time period." Flipping through the pages "Here we go. Windspear was a general during the Shadow Conflict - where a extremist group of night-worshipping ponies and some mercenary companies attempted a coup. For her actions Windspear was granted the title of Duchess (Translated from old Equus) and land that is now part of Cloudsdale."

Sun traced a hoof from the name downwards, the colors mixing in a nebulous display until it reached her name, now sparkling with a combination of what came before her, dissipating back to blue when she removed the hoof. "So does that mean...?"

"Yes. Technically, you are a descendant of royalty."

"Wow, what're the odds of that?"

Twilight gave a slight smirk. "Pretty good, actually. Titles never expired, so approximately one-third of Equestrians could claim such a title. Outside of the currently living nobles though, it doesn't mean much."

"Means enough to me. I'm gonna go use this power. Book also said somepony higher had to oversee it. You wanna?"

Slightly perplexed that Sun was presumably serious "You're serious about the duel?"

"Yeah. So you gonna or what? Er, princess Twilight."

Twilight looked over the book. "I need to study this more before I consider myself an authority on the matter. If you're truly serious, I will ask Luna. She is more familiar with the old ways than any of us." Sun almost too enthusiastically nodded. Twilight sighed. "Spike, take a letter"

Author's Note

Song is "Two Minutes to Midnight" by Iron Maiden.