Fine Feathered Fillyfriend

Indecision

Indecision

As soon as I shut the door, I scurried up to my room and leaned over the edge of the windowsill, watching as Scootaloo left. My heart was beating faster than it ever had before and I didn't know why.

The feeling confused me because I was certain I didn't feel the same way as she did.

I figured she would probably be crying for the rest of the day.

Poor filly...

Maybe the feeling came from knowing that somepony loved me. I couldn't be entirely sure, but at least I had a start.

As I thought more about it, I couldn't help but feel ashamed of how I acted during that date. How could I have been so inconsiderate?

I buried my face in my forelegs. 'Way to go, Apple Bloom... You done made her sad, and now she's going to have to live this way. You should at least do as much as you can without going too far...'

I knew it now. The feeling was sympathy. I had sympathy because she knew I didn't share her feelings. Because I didn't love her back.

But still...

Knowing that somepony loves you is something that nopony can simply put their hoof on. It was hard to understand why she loved me.

I then realized that it was because I didn't know why.

"Why does she love me?" I said aloud. I let myself ponder this as I kept looking out the window. What did she love about me? What was there to love? What did she see in me?

I had a definite feeling that the prospect of being loved was going to linger in my head for quite awhile. I felt like I would never be able to understand it.

"Why does who love you?"

My head shot up, hearing the deep, low voice behind me. I turned around quickly and tried to look innocent. "Nopony!" I grinned. "Jus' talkin' ta mahself, tha's all! Don' you worry none, Big Mac." The words came out too fast for me to actually decide what I would say. I knew it wasn't likely that he would just back away from this one.

He stepped further into my room. "What's goin' on, Apple Bloom?"

I recomposed myself and tried to look him in the eye. "It's... a pretty personal matter..." I mumbled.

He stepped closer and lifted my chin. "That's okay, sis. Ah figured that. Ah'm yer brother, remember? Ah won' judge ya none..."

I sighed and looked down again, complying with what he wanted to know. "A-ah jus' went on a short little date with mah friend, Scootaloo, and... well..."

"Well what?"

I turned back to the window. "Ah didn' even know why Ah went on it in the first place... But somewhere in the middle of it, she..."

"She what?"

I turned back toward the big red stallion. "She told me she loved me."

I saw his eyes look up for ideas while he rubbed his neck. "That quick, huh? Well, Ah reckon that sure is sudden..."

I nodded. "Yeah, it is."

He stopped rubbing his neck and looked me. "Did she tell ya why, though?"

"No! That's the thing that bothers me!" I sank down to the floor. "Ah don't know why she loves me! She knows Ah don't feel the same way an' Ah'm not really sure, mahself... How can Ah tell her Ah love her back when don't even know if Ah really do?"

I was basically talking to myself, or it felt like it until he spoke up again.

"You wanna know how ta find out, don't ya?"

I nodded again.

"Do ya think it'd be nice ta be in love with somepony?"

"Yeah... But she's a filly! A-and Ah'm a--"

"A filly, too, yes," he interrupted. "But ya know what? Ah don' think it really matters, as long as the both of you are happy."

I looked up at him for what felt like the hundredth time. I could have sworn he would get taller every time I looked away. "Ya think so?"

He nodded simply. "Ee-yup."

His words must have had an effect on me, because now I was standing up fully again. I never realized how understanding he really was until now. "Okay, Ah think Ah might give it a try. Ah'm gonna see her at Sugarcube corner tonight, anyway." I started to trot back out of my room. "Thanks, big brother."

"Ee-yup."

I felt relieved, but part of me was still worried about the outcome of this whole thing. Maybe this was the right thing to do...

...but maybe it wasn't.