We're Not Ponies!

by Number52

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Gilda, Adventure, Iron Will
Length: 1069

Spike is violently hurled from Ponyville to land in the middle of nowhere. In order to get home he must team up with some of the stranger citizens of Equestria. No Cutie Marks? No Problem!

Spike is violently hurled from Ponyville to land in the middle of nowhere. In order to get home he must team up with some of the stranger citizens of Equestria.
No Cutie Marks? No Problem!

Published 2013-02-14 06:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-02-14 06:50:01 UTC

Not Flying

Spike was flying. No, that was not the right word. Flying implied that he was moving through the air on his own power. Falling didn't work either, sense he was still gaining altitude. Spike was becoming annoyed that he could not find the proper word to describe his situation. Rocketing again implied self propulsion. Crashing was also a inappropriate, that would come later. Gliding was also wrong sense it implies some level of control. It seemed his vocabulary lacked any word to describe his current state. Maybe if he went over how he got in this predicament it would help him find the right word.

Before starting this ballistic trajectory Spike was in Ponyville town square going back to the library after delivering a book to mayor Mare. Twilight and the girls had left for Canterlot on some Elements of Harmony business. Twilight had left him in charge of the library. Now there was a thought. With Twilight out of town and Spike on his current course who would look after the library? Owlowiscious would have to hold the fort until Spike returned. If he returned.

That was not important at the moment. Spike was in the town square. Apple Bloom stopped him to ask about something, probably for another cutie mark scheme for her little club. That is when the ground started shaking. Apple Bloom and all the other ponies ran for cover. Spike looked around for the source of the disturbance. At first nothing seemed out of place.

The ground exploded. Spike was thrown? No, launched. Spike was launched into the air as some pony laughed. Down in the middle of the street the laughing pony, a unicorn wearing ornate silver armor, emerged from a newly formed tunnel flanked by two large clay golem ponies. Then Ponyville was out of sight and he was over the Everfree forest. That led him to his current predicament. His not flying, not falling, but some other word course.

No, he still could not find the right word.

Never mind, the question had become irrelevant. Spike was now going down. He was now officially falling. He was glad that the problem had sorted itself out. Of course it would not be long before he had another problem to deal with. The ground. The ground would become a very prominent problem in the near future. That process when falling becomes crashing. Then again, he was a dragon. He would survive. Probably. Either way the problem would sort itself out shortly, so there was no point in Spike worrying about it.

Spike spent some time worrying about the ponies who were in town square with him when the ground exploded. After some consideration he came to the conclusion that it was unlikely that any pony else was caught up in the blast. That was good, Spike did not know what he would do if he had to tell Applejack anything happened to her adorable little sister. Though he would still need to hurry back home.

After all that laughing pony definitely seemed like she was up to no good. Then again maybe she did not have any evil, or nefarious plans. Spike considered the odds of a heavily armored pony, commanding large, intimidating magical servitors, opening an underground tunnel in the middle of Ponyville's town square for kind, and benevolent reasons. Yes, such a scenario seemed perfectly probable, and the next time he took a trip to the Crystal Kingdom he would have to have a good laugh about his obviously irrational, and unjustified paranoia over a cup of tea with the good king Sombra. Given Ponyville's track record Spike thought every pony concerned would be lucky if she only turned out to be some power mad sorcerous or necromancer, and not some insane ancient god of death or something.

Then again, a necromancer would be icky. If it was a necromancer then Spike just knew that she would have all of her undead minions ransack the library to get a hold of all of the magical tomes stored there. Never mind the fact he and Twilight had just organized the whole thing yesterday. Never mind that there is a very helpful and easy to use card catalogue. No, a necromancer would just send all the undead in to tear apart the whole place rather then just check out the books like a civilized pony. Also, Spike did not imagine it would be easy to get the stench of rotting flesh out of the library. Spike really hoped she was not a necromancer.

Even if that cackling pony had no sinister plot, as unlikely as that maybe, Owlowiscious could not take care of the library on his own for long. What if some pony wanted to check out a book and the bird was to tired to find it? It could be a disaster. Who knows what chaos would follow.

Spike's train of thought was abruptly cut off when the transition between falling and crashing began. It started with a tree which Spike went through. He was a little amazed that it was not knocked over and at the precise Spike shaped hole he left in it before he was distracted again. The rest of his crash consisted of breaking through or bouncing off of, in no particular order, three more trees, two rocks, four bushes, a small lake, and what might have been a sacked lunch, finishing off with a long and narrow trench in the ground.

Calm and collected, Spike formed a mental check list. One by one he established that all his body parts were still intact and attached. All were accounted for. He took note of all minor injuries. Some scraped scales, and bruises. Everything seem to be in order. Finally he gave voice to his findings.

"Ow."

Soar. That would have fit. Soaring, Spike thought, would have been a good word for earlier. He would have to remember it in case this ever happened again.

Author's Note

This is my first fan fic in years. I am totally out of practice. That being said this was a lot of fun. Though I'm not sure if I will continue this. I have an idea of how this will end but honestly not much else. Anyways hope you've enjoyed.
Also I am dyslexic, so if you see any errors tell me, and I'll fix them.