Chapters Cutie Marks in...Geology!
It was like this every time Rarity had to go and save the world. Rarity would leave, and then she would put Sweetie Belle in charge. Then, Sweetie Belle would take Tom everywhere, making Tom do everything that Sweetie Belle and her friends wanted to do. Then, when Tom would stand up for himself or others, then The Cutie Mark Crusaders, mainly Sweetie Belle, would threaten that they would tell on Tom. I mean it wasn't even worth it, but suicide, No Tom could NEVER do that. He just dealt with it. Tom was a pretty tough guy, it was just his inside that was soft. Anyway, Tom knew that he couldn't stop what was inevitable so he went with Sweetie Belle without complaint.
It was at 2:00 when Sweetie Belle had gathered her friends: Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. They were all laughing and shouting. Tom couldn't take it. These ponies were so selfish. I mean they weren't laughing about getting some pizza or ice cream or whatever else ponies eat... NO! They were laughing about how they were going to get their cutie marks in Geology...and they were going to do this on, yup, you guessed it, Tom. They didn't even ask for his permission. Instead, they were just going to drill holes, carve pieces, and chisel away at Tom's poor body. Tom thought about up and leaving right there, but Tom, as all rocks are, wasn't a quitter, and neither was he a complainer. Tom decided that he would stay, and hopefully, these ponies would give him the respect rocks deserve one day.
Anyways, it took about an hour before Tom and the CMC made it to the Everfree Forest. Tom advised against the ponies going in there, but they didn't listen to, as they mocked at Tom with, a "Stupid, old, clumsy, and fat rock". Tom was getting furious, but he kept his cool. Anyway, Tom figured that maybe he could make them realize how stupid they were in return when some TimberWolve tried and gobbles them up. Then Tom would be the one to see who was laughing then. Anyway, they entered the forest.
It was a dark and scary forest, the Everfree Forest was. It was so dark that, well, many a black guy was lost in there. No, I am just kidding, but it was dark though. It was also so thick that many a fat white guy got trapped in there. See, all of you racists out there I just put forth two jokes mocking both so there. Stop being angry! Let me get on with the story. Man, why they always got to be starting trouble. Anyways, It was dark, very dark. Most couldn't see. It was also thick, very thick. It was practically a forest of those annoying things that are always getting stuck on you, not allowing you to move. They are so annoying, I mean...
"Hey Narrator! GET BACK TO THE STORY!!!"
Oh sorry, so very sorry audience, right, so where was I? Oh yes, so it was a dark and scary forest. Tom and the CMC were going through the forest like the CMC did every other day practically. Tom personally thought that they were stupid. He also saw no reason for it. "I mean seriously" Tom would imagine "these fillies never got there marks anyway". It was true though, I mean three seasons and not one of those little guys got there little butt tattoo things that determine who somepony is even though half the time they have nothing to do with what you are. Think about Silver Spoon. I mean seriously, a spoon, what type of talent is that? I mean is that really going to change the world. NO of course not, a spoon, how stupid. Anyway, I digress, so Tom and the CMC are walking through the forest. There are creepy noises all around. Every pony is scared, but Tom. Rocks don't fear. Then, somepony steps on a stick, and every body screams, except Tom. Tom is a rock. Rocks don't scream. Then howl of Timberwolves. Everypony shivers together, except Tom. He is a rock. Rocks don't--
"Hey Narrator!"
Oh yes audience?
"Could you maybe make the story, oh I don't know, JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE INTERESTING!!!!!"
Right, right sorry about that audience, will do. Alright then, let us resume where we left off. Tom and the ponies are crossing a mysterious, foggy river. The river itself is going a million miles a minute, swishing in every direction. Howls in the distance are creeping into everyone's bones, except for the fearless rock, Tom, who shows no fear. Then, a lone tentacle shoots up, and everyone cowers back screaming in the highest of girly pitches. The tentacle is grabbed by a huge sea monster who comes crashing down on the beastly tentacle. The tentacle crashes back into the vast bottom below, and the fearsome sea serpent follows. So how is that audience?
"Oh much better, but don't keep interrupting narrator man, its getting a little bit annoying"
Right, right sorry, makes sense will do. Alright before I move on, is there anything else you need?
"Well, could you possibly speed up to the point where we find out about this geology thing?"
Oh of course audience. Alright, so after many travels, the CMC finally come to the filly playground. Now why, you may ask, would there be a fillies playground in the middle of one of the worst forests ever. The forests where practically all pure evil lurks, well, I will tell you, the answer is budget cuts. Yes sir, that is why, the mayor needed money, but the people wanted a playground, so they built one in the Everfree Forest. Simple as that. Anyways, the CMC brought all of their cutie mark crusader Geology equipment. It said it was 100% genuine, but Tom could tell it was bought at a one bit store. Anyways, the fillies went to go play, while Tom sat at a bench. It was, well, boring, especially for a rock. I mean seriously rocks usually lived the high life. They had gold, diamonds, all that crap man. They also had the ladies. No rock Tom knew didn't have a wife. Tom was working on that. He thought he would move out soon and find a nice lady, but he never got around to it. Anyway, Tom sat down. Now audience, do you want me to explain how Tom sat down or can you just deal with the fact that Tom sat down?
"TELL US HOW!!! TELL US HOW!!!"
Fine. fine, alright audience here is how Tom sat down. Man, you guys need to know everything, anyways, here it is. Tom began to roll ever so slightly to the old, wooden bench. It creaked and bore those nasty little bugs called Earwigs everywhere. Good thing for Tom that he was a rock. Tom was within two feet from the bench when a little ladybug came to Tom, and began to speak with him.
"Dear sir? I am a poor old widow. Could you possibly offer me any money? I only need a little bit." said the Ladybug.
"Oh, well, ma'am I guess I could lend you something. Let me see how much I have. Oh, I have these two bits, would you mind that?" said Tom
"Oh no that is perfect" replied the Ladybug. As Tom handed the bits over to the lady bug, the lady bug ripped them from Tom's one arm. She then flew away and called Tom a loser before dashing away. Tom was kind of angry, but then he saw the Ladybug get eaten by a stork. It was kind of like one of those movies. Anyways, Tom continued to roll toward the bench because he really didn't care what happened to a lady bug. He made it to the bench and sat down, but the bench fell apart under his weight. Well, that stunk because now Tom would have to repay all the money for the bench. He blamed this all on taxes. Tom was in deep thought when Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo came over. They all had these really weird grins on their faces. "Oh no", thought Tom, "Something I won't like is about to happen".
"So Tom... we were wondering if we could borrow you for our... Geology tests?", asked Scootaloo.
"Ya, Tom we really need ya'" retorted Apple Bloom. Tom was sure that they really needed him for one of their dang experiments. Tom really hated those butt tattoo things. They were called cutie marks or something like that.
"Please Tom? We won't tell Rarity that you were a bad rock", Sweetie Belle was trying to pin this on Tom. It made Tom furious, but Tom would still need a place to stay so, for the time being, he would allow them to do their geology thing. After all, how bad could it be (Don't you hate this question in a story, I mean whenever it is asked you know something bad is about to happen especially when they put this phrase in a sentence then you just know some thing is about to happen... Don't you also hate it when some one puts in parentheses a humongous hint as to what is about to happen... Ya, I hate that too).
"Fine" replied Tom, "Just for now".
"Thanks Tom", replied Scootaloo, "Thanks a ton". When Scootaloo finished, of course, she pulled out, yup you guessed it, a huge sledgehammer. Apple Bloom followed her lead and pulled out a jack hammer. Then came Sweetie Belle with her prized... HUGE HAMMER MALLET. Yup, Tom went and said the phrase, and something very bad did happen (at least for Tom).
"Well...Crap" said Tom, "Just crap".
"Okay Tom, now this may only hurt a bit", said Scootaloo.
"Ya right", said Tom. Actually, Tom was going to say, "Hit me with your best shot", but he really didn't want to get sued by the person who wrote that song, so he decided to say, "Ya right". Anyways, they hammered at Tom for a while. It started to hurt after about an hour. Then, it burned after two. Tom was almost going to run home, or at least to wherever he could go, but he didn't because he knew that would be unwise. Finally, the CMC stopped after two more grueling hours. They didn't even apologize. They just started to head home. They were actually going to leave Tom in the dust, but Tom was still strong enough to stay with them, so he did.
They started to head back into the brush when a wild Mr. Timn appeared. Mr. Timn's, by the way, were notorious for annoying ponies to death (the younger ones anyways). This Mr. Timn could have had the three ponies in his clutches. He could have killed them by annoyance, and Tom could have sat back and watched it all. Tom considered it, but he also remembered what his great grandfather had told him years before. His great grandfather had once told Tom that, "Grandson you should never eat poison berries because they upset your stomach, and oh yeah, also we are rock kind known for our forgiveness, so always forgive as a rock and strive to protect and serve". Tom remembered that, but he also remembered all of the cruel things that the CMC had done to him. Tom had a choice to make. Tom the rock did, in fact, have a choice to make.
Tom decided that he would save the CMC, so he rushed the wild Mr. Timn. Tom was a madman...or a mad rock. Did you all see that pun. Wasn't it just funny. I mean I am dying laughing over here. You know wouldn't that stink. I mean when you go to a gravesight you see things like, "Here lies so and so who died from a gunshot wound or old age or whatever", but could you imagine seeing, "Here lies So and so (ha you thought I would reveal my name) who died of laughter", man that would stink. Anyways, so Tom rushes the Mr. Timn. Tom knew there was only one way to defeat a Mr. Timn, and that was by beating him at his annoyance. Its a good thing Tom was in to comedy and randomness because if he wasn't, well, he probably would have lost. Tom began the random battle first.
"So Mr. Timn, you thought you could defeat me, but you don't realize that I like trains, so what now punk?! What you going to do!!", Tom spoke with the most pwning tone.
"I see you know the ways of the hot dog", replied Mr. Timn, "but do you know the ways of... the pork fried rice!!?", Mr. Timn's were known for their pure randomness that was so evil, it was despicable.
"Well, Mr. Timn I know not of the ways of the pork fried rice, but I know that the cookie is the best part of the oreo!! What you going to do now, Mr. Timn?", Tom was on a roll, a rock hard one that is...
"You think you're a smart rock, but you don't even realize that I got that bling from that swag store form that place in L.A. in the area where people poop, and order patties!!", Mr. Timn was talking so fast, that Superman turned into a bird.
Tom was getting a little nervous now. He knew that Mr. Timn was beating him back, but what could Tom do. He was running out of randomness. He was going mad. He was getting a severe case of rock diarrhea. He was getting--
"Hey narrator... Get on with the story!! We get what was happening to Tom" the audience was always interrupting.
Ya ya audience fine. Anyways, Mr. Timn was getting out of hand. He was beating Tom back, and then it got worse.
"Hey you big orange... whatever you are, stop being a bully!!", screamed Apple Bloom. Oh no, that's right boys and girls, Apple Bloom said something that wasn't even random. This just made it worse. Every Rock knew that if you encountered a wild Mr. Timn in the forest that you never said anything not random or else... Someone might steal your ice cream, and also that the Mr. Timn would get worse and call all of his friends. This was getting very bad, and Tom knew it.
"Oh yeah", concured Mr. Timn while baking some bacon (pigs were bacon before it was cool you know), "You don't even realize that when 2+2=5 that it is because a dog somewhere in Mercury is pooping all over your favorite blanket which Celestia banished to Mercury because, well, Mercury is her favorite travel spot, and we all know that Celestia is scared of the dark, so she keeps herself a blanket". Tis true, Celestia was scared of the dark.
What the heck, another narrator in my story about Tom get out of here other narrator.
"No!" replied the other narrator.
Oh so you're going to be a wise guy well.
"What the heck... does any pony else hear those random voices from the sky", replied Scootaloo.
"Thats it!!!!!" screamed Tom, "I am done, This story is suppose to be about me, so get back to this story being about me!!".
Oh right, so sorry Tom right I will stop okay, so here is the deal I shot the other narrator, and I am going to resume from where I left off so Mr. Timn says what he just said about three or more paragraphs up, and here is what Sweetie Belle replies with.
"That is a lie... Princess Celestia isn't scared of any one or anything!!", Sweetie Belle was furious with this Mr. Timn creature.
"Ha ha your the princess and I am the poop. I also like to eat pie, unless it is pie flavor!", Replied Mr. Timn.
"How could you disrespect our princess like that, you villain!!", replied Apple Bloom.
"I am the new princess... every pony bow down to me, unless you're a horse, then go fart on yourself!", Mr. Timn was no princess, but he sure thought he was.
"That's it," yelled Scootaloo, "I am going to kick you in the shin, and call you a rip off artist!!", Scootaloo began to walk over to Mr. Timn. Tom stopped her just in time, though.
"No!!", yelled Tom, "These wild Mr. Timn's are very dangerous, do not engage them!!". Mr. Timn was right, it was very dangerous to engage a Mr. Timn head on.
"What's a matter?" asked Mr. Timn to Scootaloo, "Chicken?". Oh Mr. Timn, you're just so funny calling out a brony meme out like that, oh you. Mr. Timn began to laugh. He also continued to talk. He must have talked for 12 hours before Tom finally did something. It all happened like this.
Tom and the CMC are sitting there listening to Mr. Timn, when Tom notices that the CMC are getting annoyed almost to the point of death. Tom realized that he had to do something, but he wasn't sure what. Tom knew that he wouldn't win in a random duel, but he wasn't sure what he was to do. Tom thought about this question for one hour, and then Tom was just fed up. He just jumped on top of Mr. Timn, and Mr. Timn was crushed, and that was the end of that. I know, I know, pretty awesome huh? Ya, I thought the same thing. Tom is just so stinking awesome (No but seriously Tom doesn't shower often). Anyways, so the CMC were all like...
"Tom, Tom that was awesome... You just saved us!! Tom you are the best, we love you", began Scootaloo. Then Apple Bloom started to speak too.
"Tom, you is so nice... Thanks you kindly for saving us, we love you!!", followed up Apple Bloom. Finally, Sweetie Belle started up.
"Tom... I am so so so sorry for being so mean to you... Could you ever forgive me?", Sweetie Belle was sincere.
"Yes", replied Tom, "I forgive all of you, and I always will!!". Tom was a very forgiving rock just like Jesus Christ (and I am very serious here). Also, get ready to cry even more because then all of the CMC went over and hugged Tom. They all forgave each other, and Tom even shed a tear. It was a great day for Tom. Things finally started to turn around. In fact, they all walked back to Ponyville and had ice cream and ate pizza and random music started playing in the back ground. It was beautiful. The CMC even let Tom join their group. It was a great day for Tom, and Tom was finally starting to learn his destiny.
In this next issue of Tom's Destiny, Larry the Cucumber will finally find his hairbrush, which he had lost over 12 years ago. He will find it in--
Hey!! This new narrator, I just wanted to let you know that... You're in the WRONG Story!!!!
Oh, Am I? I am so sorry. I get mixed up all the time. You know, Larry always did have a ton of silly songs, and man fellow narrator, There were just so many. I felt sometimes like--
Other Narrator... LEAVE PLEASE!!! I really have to explain to my fellow audience what happens next in Tom's Destiny, so if you could just go for only a little bit, I would be much obliged.
Oh yes, yes sorry fellow narrator I will go, but could you possibly point me to the direction of where they record silly songs with Larry?
Of course fellow comrade narrator, It is just down the hall to your left.
Thank You!!
No problem so where was I? Oh yes, Tom's Destiny, so in this next installment of Tom's Destiny, we find that Tom and the CMC after barely escaping death from the wild Mr. Timn are on their way home to Carousel Boutique where they will make all types of soups. The only problem is that... all of the CMC have changed their diets to... cannibalism. DUH DUH DUHHHHHH. No just kidding. The actual problem is that they are out of Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup which means that they have to go to the grocery store. This might seem like an easy task except that there are two problems. One is that they don't have a credit card, and the other is that at this hour there are some...dare I say it... RUSSIAN DANCING MEN. Yes, Yes, I know that you all flinched at the very word. It was almost worst than the very word tomato, but it had to be said. You see when you're in Ponyville and you encounter RUSSIAN DANCING MEN, you normally start... dancing. Yes, Yes, I know very scary, but it is the truth, and we all know that when you start dancing with RUSSIAN DANCING MEN, you NEVER Stop!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Anyways, the CMC and Tom didn't go to the grocery store because, like I said, they didn't have a credit card and there were RUSSIAN DANCING MEN. Instead, they all went for ice cream. YAY!!
When the CMC and Tom got there, however, there standing there was...was...was...was..........was...Diamond Tiara and...and...and...and...and.......and........and Silver Spoon. It was horrifying (although if you ask me, I would have beaten those two up already, I mean come on there were three of the CMC compared to the measly two of the...Whatever there called. I mean think about it, when Spiderman came to Ponyville he kicked Diamond Tiara into a nearby tree...although I guess he did that to Apple Bloom too...hmmm... I guess it is a small world after all, and don't bust into singing. I'm warning you!). Anyways, so Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon turned around like they always do, and started to mock, guess who? yup, the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
"Well if it isn't the blank flanks?", oh my like we haven't heard that line come out of Diamond Tiara's mouth before. Then of course Silver Spoon would say.
"YAAAAAAAAAAA!!". You know I feel like they stole this from Lilo and Stitch, but then again if they did, you already know that every one would be sued. I mean Weird Al even wrote a song about it. Anyways (man I use this alot, but its just so catchy).
"No it's not!!", said my boss. I didn't say anything back, because I didn't want to be fired. That is a good goal, right? Not being fired. Man this world is just--
"Hey Narrator!!!!!!!! Stop with the interrupting of the story!!" said the audience again.
Dang it audience, Why you always gotta be interrupting me. You know what, I am sick and tired of you. I am just going to ignore you, and I am going to move on with life.
"If you do that Narrator we're going to be disliking your story, and we may even contact Hasbro to make toys out of you except that we're going to make you look just plain stupid... And we'll tell your boss!"
Wait!! Wait! Hey audience, I just rethought my life like Obi Wan Kenobi told me to do in the second movie. I'll stop interrupting, okay? Just please don't do all of the horrible things you said you would do a second ago? Please?
"Alright... THEN GET BACK TO THE STORY!!!!!!!"
Right, sorry about that audience so Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon say their two lines, and then Apple Bloom is all like...
"You guys are such bullies. Why don't you just leave us alone! Why can't we be friends (Don't even think about the song)" said Apple Bloom.
"Ya", replied Scootaloo, "What Apple Bloom just said"
"Ya", replied Sweetie Belle, "What Scootaloo just said about Apple Bloom saying!"
"Well, you Cutie Marks Crusaders (yes, yes audience she said it in a sarcastic way) can't even have a good catch phrase like we do" replied Diamond Tiara.
"Oh yeah!!", screamed Apple Bloom, "Well at least we have one, Fred doesn't"
"Fred? Who is he? Is he one of those little dolls you have?", retorted Diamond Tiara. Man, I must admit Sweetie Belle was on a roll (No, not on an egg roll).
"No!! Fred is that human being from Scooby Doo! He never got any catch phrase, while we at least have one so what now, Diamond Tiara!!", Apple Bloom was correct in a way though, I mean Fred always came up with the plans, but he himself didn't even have a good catch phrase.
"Man, you guys watch waaaay too much Television", replied Diamond Tiara.
"We do not", replied Scootaloo, "well, actually... we do"
"Ga ha" burst out Silver Spoon (oh my word, man she actually said something other than that incessant YAAAAAA... Oh my word she is continuing to speak, man this is just way to interesting so every body shut up, clap your hands, and listen). "I bet you CMC that that is the reason you don't have your cutie mark because you watch way too much television while you could be getting your cutie mark."
"Ya, you tell them Silver Spoon!!", Diamond Tiara had to say something, and she did.
"Thank you Captain Obvious!!" came the audience again.
Dang it audience, can't you just listen to the story and stop opening your mouths. I am getting just so sick and tired of you bothering me. Just shut up. That joke, the Captain Obvious one, is soooooo old. You guys seriously need to update your stuff.
"Find then... we all have it... we will start a new fad, from now on we will say Thank you Capitan Obvious!!"
Seriously audience, are you serious? You guys are making me so angry, can we please all just sit back and listen.
"Ya... Just as soon as you get back to the story"
What?!?! I was telling the story, and then you guys just-- Oh never mind, anyways, so Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara walk away laughing annoyingly and stupidly like they always do. Good writhens to them (I wish I could say good writhens to the audience too).
"We heard that!!"
I bet you did audience, I bet you did! Back to the story, so when the CMC and Tom get to the ice cream man, they find out that he ran over a bunch of fat kids with his van, and also that the two people/dogs are, in fact, Scooby-Doo and Shaggy. How they got here, I don't know, but if I were you I would go ask the audience. Anyways, because the ice cream booth was occupied by these two guys/dogs, the ice cream ran out by the time that the CMC and Tom got there. This was sad for every one, but, of course, only for a moment because the ice cream supply factory (Why they would have one in the middle of Ponyville, I don't know, but they did so don't question it), but anyways, the ice cream supply factory was open so Scooby and Shaggy ran over, got more ice cream, and every body/pony/dog/rock/whatever you are spent their cash and ate happily ever after, except for Tom, he doesn't eat. Then all of the Cutie Marks Crusaders went home because the sun was going down (even though Celestia was rotting in a prison cell with the whole chain thing and the random skeleton that is always in the cell and the blah blah blah, but that part of the story will be revealed in the next chapter unless, for some reason, the Mayans were only a few days off, and the world will end before I can publish the next chapter, then sorry guys but I will not reveal the end of this story early so until then go do something else!! Thanks, have a nice day). Anyways, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo went home, while Sweetie Belle and Tom galloped and rolled the final way to the Carousel Boutique. On the way, Sweetie Belle and Tom got in a discussion.
"Hey Tom", said Sweetie Belle.
"Yes, my dear Sweetie Belle", replied Tom.
"I think you are the most nicest rock I ever met, and I am so sorry that I was so mean to you all of those days before I found out just what a nice rock you are"
"Well...Thanks Sweetie Belle, I am just so glad that we both appreciate each other now"
"Hey Tom?"
"Yes, Sweetie Belle"
"Are you... Are you ever going to leave us because I don't want you to go... I... I really like you Tom, and I never want you to leave"
"No Sweetie Belle, You know what... No I am never going to leave you or Rarity, I just hope that I can convince Rarity to like me more, but do not worry, I will not be leaving any time I know, and if I do it is only because I am going to do something for someone else"
"Okay Tom... I am just so glad that you aren't going to leave us. Thanks for comforting me, and Tom?"
"Yes Sweetie Belle?"
"I really enjoyed this day with you"
"Thanks Sweetie Belle... I really enjoyed this day with you too"
Hello! Hello? Is this thing on? Oh, good, okay hello, This is the boss man speaking. Umm, the other narrator broke into sobs so we are just going to give him about five minutes, and then he will continue the story, so ummm, ya just wait five minutes...
FIVE MINUTES LATER
Okay, Okay, I am done being manly back there, so where was--
"Hey Narrator?"
Oh, what now audience?
"We all know that you were crying back there"
What NO! Me? I don't cry. I am so manly that when I came out of the womb, I never even shed a tear.
"Well the boss put us all on hold because you were crying"
No! That was just my liquid pride going off again.
"Narrator, you just stole that from Shining Armor"
What? Where would you guys ever come up with a crazy idea like that?
"Whatever Narrator! We all know you were crying back there"
Ya okay audience... whatever you say? Psssh, stupid audience thinking I was crying. They don't even realize that I was making my daily bowl of nails without any milk.
"Whatever Narrator"
Ya whatever. Anyways, so Tom and Sweetie Belle all walked back home, and when they got inside Tom went up into Sweetie Belle's room, and tucked her in. They both said good night, and Tom went down stairs. He went into his bed, pulled on his covers, and before he went to sleep, he wondered why Rarity was taking so long to get back. I mean, Tom knew that Rarity usually took like one 20 minute episode, maybe a 40 minute episode to get back, but it had already been like two or three days. Something was up, and Tom would soon find out what.
Tom awoke like he did every afternoon only this time he would be visited by none other than... yup you guessed it... the mail man.
There was a faint knock on the Carousel Boutique's door. Tom was awakened by the sound, and quickly got up, and went to go see who could be knocking at such an hour (even though it was like 2:00 in the afternoon, sheesh Tom, I see why Rarity wakes you up so early you lazy rock). Anyways, Tom went over to the door, opened it, and found out that the mysterious knocker was actually just the mailman. He was angry. He yelled at Tom that he had been knocking on Tom's door for over three hours. Tom, of course, didn't hear the knocking because Tom had a hearing problem. The mailman didn't move on to the next house because One: The Carousel Boutique didn't have a mailbox, Two: The mailman was required to wait to deliver mail, and Three: The mailman was just plain stupid. Actually, the mailman was a very smart pony but he has his own story, and this is Tom's so lets get back to it. Anyways, Tom took the mail, apologized to the mailman, and then Tom went and sat down to read it.
He opened the message. It was from Spike. "Spike", thought Tom, "Why would he send me a message. I could have sworn that he didn't go on the trip with the Mane 6. Hmmph, Oh well, let's see what it says". Tom then tore the paper open, and read it to himself. It read...
"Dear Tom. This is Spike (No duh Spike of course it is you!! Man, these Equestrians can be so dumb). I have an urgent message so come over immediately to Twilight's library". Well, that was a quick message, and oh hey look that is exactly what Tom thought.
"Well, that was a quick message", thought Tom. See look at that, I can see into the future. I must be one of those psychiatrists or whatever.
"Hey Narrator, Its called a Psychic!"
Oh shut up audience, what do you know?
"Well, we know a ton of stuff that you don't like, for example, that you cried in the last chapter"
I already told you audience, I was not crying, I was just eating a bowl of nails without any milk.
"Ya, and where did you get that from, SpongeBob SquarePants?"
No, heh, I got it from my manly brain.
"Hey Narrator!?"
What?
"Chuck Norris."
What where!? Quick Hide me! Don't let him kill me ple-- Oh, I mean I would take Chuck Norris down any day of the wekewkfnewnfeo.
Ummm Hello? Ya this is the boss man again. Ummm, well you see the other narrator was killed by Chuck Norris so, ummm, ya we're going to have to get a new one. It could take like three days so, ummmm, please just wait until then.
THREE DAYS LATER
Hi, I am the new Narrator. My name is Normal, and I am here to tell you a story. Let's get to it then. Okay, lets see where the other narrator left off. Oh my!? What the crap is this crap? A toilet? Now wait a second? What type of story is this? Where the heck am I?
"Hey new narrator?"
Oh my look the new audience. How are you guys doing? Are you doing well? I am happy if you are doing well? If you aren't, though, I might have to kill you!!
"Okay, well then, so new narrator you left off at the part where Tom just got a letter from Spike"
Oh, okay, ya I found it , okay thanks guys, okay well lets continue. Alright, so after Spike sends this message to Tom, Tom, who thinks that Spike is such a lazy slug because Tom's house is right next to Twilight's library where Spike resides, and I mean seriously couldn't Spike have just walked over and gave Tom the message, or better yet, couldn't Spike have just told Tom in person. I mean what the crap man, Tom was right next door, and the message was like only two sentences long. Man, you know what I think that Spike got a little lazy in his days off. Twilight, you seriously need to get back here, and deal with your lazy, little slob of a pet.
"Well, I would except that, oh I don't know, I am just captured by this new villain that will soon be shown in like two or three chapters", Twilight interrupted my story.
What the crap? Twilight, how the heck did you get here? You're supposed to be all criveling in fear because the villain got you guys all captured.
"Dang it Narrator!! Why you always gotta be spoiling everything?", the audience again.
Hey audience, You stay out of this! I didn't spoil anything, and Twilight was the one who interrupted in the first place!
"Me interrupted? Maybe if you didn't call Spike lazy, and then go and say that I should come back, then maybe I wouldn't have interrupted your dang story!!", Twilight spoke again.
Well, you know what? Why don't I ju--
"Hey guys!!! This is my story anyways, so please get back to it!! You want to have your own story afterward, be my guest, but this is mine, and so lets leave it that way!!!", Tom came on the phone.
Now you listen up Tom! I am the one who was hired to tell your story, and you listen up I can quit anytime I want, so you better just shut up, and-- Wait Tom what are you doing? Tom, wait don't come in my house... Wait Tom I'm sorry, No please don't do that------
Man, How many people am I going to have to hire. Ya, by the way, this is the boss man again. Tom went and killed the other narrator so, here is what we are going to do, I am going to hire another one. He will be here in like thirty days so, ya sorry, but he is shipping from Antarctica. He is coming. As for what just happened, let's pretend that it didn't happen for just a second, and continue to let the story play out, okay? Good, now sit back and listen.
THIRTY DAYS LATER
Hello! I am going to get right to the story, after I introduce this joke. The joke is, Why did the fat turkey cross the road? Because he was going to get hit by my car! Ahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahaha......... Laugh or die. Okay, so about three hundred people didn't laugh, and they all died. No just kidding. Or am I? Mwhahahahahahahahahahah. Okay, back to the story, so Tom gets this message, and walks over to Spike's house, which is literally like ten feet away. When Tom knocks on the door, no dragon answers. Tom knocks again. No dragon answers. Tom knocks again. A dragon replies, "Who is it?".
"Yo, Narrator (Tom got his whole gangsta setup on), I didn't even say that lame joke! And dude, we heard that like a million times before!!"
Oh right sorry, I was just like in the zone, as it were, so here is the real conversation between Spike and Tom.
"Hey, is any dragon home?", asked Tom.
"Ya, man, I-- I (Spike burps, which means that he is probably drunk from hot sauce) I-- bro, I am just like here man", Spike replied.
"Okay, well Spike, You sent me a message in the mail, even though we're like two feet away. Dude, why did you spend all that money on that stamp, there like two million dollars for one, man?"
"Oh, well Tom, actually I used Twilight's entire (burp) life savings on that crap man, It was like so totally awesome bro (Spike burps again)"
"Okay, well Spike, you don't sound so good perhaps I should come back at another time?"
"No! no man, I got this here let me open the door". Spike heads over to the door, but since he is like really drunk it takes him like two hundred minutes to get there. He finally does though. "Yo man, what up look man so come in to like the outside man?"
"Spike, you do realize that you are in Twilight's house, right?"
"No bro, I am outside of Twilight's house dude."
"Okay, well anyway, umm Spike what was that message that you wanted to give me?"
"Oh, ya, well look Tom basically, everyone's been enslaved up in over in that Canterlot place, so basically, they need you to go and like rescue them, man"
"ME!! Spike why didn't they ask for you? I mean seriously! Didn't you save the Crystal Empire or something?"
"No, dude, Cadance saved that dump (Of course, Spike was saying this even though his place was worse than Davy Jone's locker)"
"But dude, every body said that you saved it, man"
"Ya well whatever Tom, look you going to go and save them or what? Because if you ask me, I am enjoying my hot sauce just fine, thank you very much! So anyways, I am going to-- (Spike falls on the floor, knocked out because he had way too much hot sauce)"
"Okay... Well, I guess I will just leave Spike there because I am a good rock", said Tom (How that is a good thing, I don't know, but if you recall Tom killed our other narrator like thirty paragraphs back or whatever so just let Tom be Tom, and stop interrupting the story!).
Anyways, Tom goes back home to think about what just happened, and what he should do about it. He thinks so hard, that when he comes out of his thought, he finds that someone had sculpted him into the Thinker (No, I am just kidding, but he does think late into the day, or night because Tom actually woke up in the day). Tom finally decides. However, because I am a sinister narrator, I am going to make you wait until the next chapter to hear what happens. Mwhahahahahahahahahahahahaha--uhh Choking, random fly came into my mouth. I am dying. I am dead.
DANG IT!!!! I am sick and tired of hiring all of these narrators! Ya, by the way, its the boss man again, and the other narrator just died because he swallowed a fly, the spider went to the fly, the cat went to eat the spider, the dog went to eat the cat, Oh, for the love of Pete, I think you already know this nursery rhyme. Basically, the other narrator died, and I have to hire another one, so in the next chapter you will get a new narrator who will reveal Tom's decision of whether he will go and save the day or whether he will stay at home, and be a bum. Good luck, and just wait for the next chapter.
THE NEXT CHAPTER
Hey, I am like the new narrator so what's up dudes. Okay, I am like totally going to get right to Tom's decision bro's. So, bro's, here is Tom's decision, but I must warn you dudes and dudets, its a doozy. Anyways, bro's, here is Tom's decision.
Tom went right back home to think over what he could decide. It was either save every body or like totally let them rot in a jail cell until they die. Tom looked at the pro's and con's of both. He decided. He was going to let every body rot in a jail cell until they died. Seriously, bro's, this is what Tom decided. NO!!!! I am just messing with you, Tom actually decided to go and save every body. He then went to pack.
After packing which took Tom like thirty minutes because he is like a rock and all. I mean he doesn't need anything to defend himself with. He works out. Tom has like rock hard abs, a bulging bicep, and like the strongest pecs ever man. Anyways, Tom packed and then went to go and wake up Sweetie Belle.
"Sweeetie Belle? Sweetie Belle? Are you awake (I don't get why people ask that question, I mean seriously) Sweetie Belle?", asked Tom again and again until Sweetie Belle awoke.
"Huh, oh yes Big brother?", questioned Sweetie Belle.
Before continuing and since you can't like see Tom's emotions, I must say that Tom started to crack. It was like Humpty Dumpty except without the fall. Tom almost cried because Sweetie Belle had called Tom Big brother. No pony/rock/whatever you are ever called Tom a big brother. It made Tom crumble inside. Tom almost didn't go, but he knew that for the sake of everyone, he had to.
"Well... well listen Sweetie Belle...Something's...Something's come up over in Canterlot with your sister Rarity. I... I have to go and see what she needs.", spoke Tom again.
"Oh cool Tom, here I will go and get the CMC and we can go with you too that way we can tell Rarity and all of the ponies that you are so nice.", Sweetie Belle like jumped out of bed, and like totally went to run for her things, but Tom like stopped her.
"No Sweetie Belle, no, you can not come with me. I have to do this on my own. I have to take this journey." Tom was like on the verge (what a cool word to say, verge, laugh out loud brothers), anyways Tom was on the verge of crying, but he couldn't because, well, he had to be strong for Sweetie Belle, and also because, well, Rocks just didn't cry on a regular basis.
"But Tom, we can help you, I mean what is the danger involved anyways. Its not like Rarity and her friends didn't stop whatever problem they had this time, is it?", Sweetie Belle was like doing that thing where like you know, but you don't. Its annoying, bro's.
"Listen, Sweetie Belle, I have to go alone. I have to go without you. I am sorry, but I have to do this."
"Oh, okay Tom, if you have to, but who is going to watch over me, Spike?"
Tom knew he couldn't like let Sweetie Belle like stay home alone (I mean we all saw that movie, and we all knew what happened there), but Tom also knew he couldn't let Spike watch them. Spike was a stinking drunkard while Twilight was gone. This left Spike no choice. He had to ask his other good friend Big Mac.
"Actually", Tom spoke, "I am going to see if you can stay with Big Mac and Granny Smith for a while, is that okay with you, Sweetie Belle?"
"OH YESSS!!! I want too! I want too! I WANT TOO!", screamed Sweetie Belle. It was actually so loud that I went like deaf in my left ear man. It was loud.
"Okay. Okay.", Tom chuckled or whatever rocks like do when they laugh. He then made Sweetie Belle some breakfast and went to go and talk to Granny Smith and Big Mac, while Sweetie Belle enjoyed her pony BREAKFAST OF PRINCESSES (ha ha did you see what I did there? Or actually read it? But see, I totally did a play on words of like Breakfast of Champions). Alright, fine, don't laugh and just get back to what Tom and Granny Smith and Big Mac discussed.
Tom rolled on over to Granny Smith's and Big Mac's house. When he arrived, he found Big Mac in the fields, kicking apple trees to get the apples (NO DUH). Tom went over to talk to Big Mac, but he tripped twice (How a rock trips, don't ask me). He then got to Big Mac who didn't even notice Tom.
"Hey Big Mac, nice weather we're having, isn't it?", asked Tom.
"Oh, hey Tom? How are you? and oh yes, EEEYUP!", replied Big Mac. You must understand that Big Mac was a man of action instead of just words, bro's.
"Hey Big Mac, can I talk to you and Granny Smith for a bit?"
"Of course Tom. Here let me just finish doing this last tree, and then I'll join you".
"Okay, thanks Big Mac, here I'll help you real quick.". Then Tom went and rolled into the apple tree, while Big Mac kicked the trees. Personally, I thought this was mean because, well, you know its not nice to just kick people, but what does the audience like care, man? They hate to hear me, so just listen to the rest of the story.
When Tom and Big Mac finished the last tree, they picked up the apples that were gained, and brought them over to wherever the Apple Family dumps their apples. Then Tom and Big Mac went over to talk to Granny Smith after both Tom and Big Mac greeted Apple Bloom. Finally, they found Granny Smith working the kitchen.
"Hey Granny Smith?", interrupted and questioned Big Mac, "Can we talk for a second?"
"Oh of course dear." replied Granny Smith, "What do you need?". Granny Smith turned around and also saw Tom. Se gave him a warm greeting too. "Oh, hello Tom how are you this fine evening?"
"Uh Granny?", interrupted Big Mac, "It's actually the morning."
"Oh, horse feathers, Big Mac, they're all the same to me" replied Granny Smith.
"Well, anyway, hello Granny Smith, how are you?", asked Tom.
"Very well, thank you Tom, its always nice to see a big, strong rock around protecting Ponyville", replied Granny Smith. I have to interrupt the story here to tell you that truly the only ponies at first who were ever nice to Tom were, in fact, the Apple Family and that is why Tom liked them the most. He was also like glad that others were starting to enjoy him.
"Thanks, Granny Smith", replied Tom.
Okay, well, dude and dudets they all basically like talked for a while, but it was one of those conversations that has nothing to do with the story, and I am sure that you all don't want to hear that. If you do, well, too bad bro's because I lost the script to that part so there! Anyways, here is the rest of the script that I do have. Okay, so Tom, Big Mac, and Granny Smith talked for what seemed like hours before Big Mac finally remembered that Tom had come there for a reason besides just saying hi.
"Oh yes Tom, did you have something you wanted to ask us again? I forgot if you said so." asked Big Mac.
"Oh right, right, sorry guys. Ya, look I hate to be a burden or anything, but I was just wondering if you could possibly take Sweetie Belle for a little while? You see something has come up in Canterlot that has to do with all of our sisters and the rest of the mane 6. I don't know what exactly yet, but I know it is bad so could you take her for a while? Or is that too much?", pleaded Tom.
"Oh, of course, we can take Sweetie Belle for a while. Ya, here just bring her tommorrow, and we will watch her for all the time that you need". Granny Smith said this most excitedly.
"Oh thank you thank you guys. I will owe you big time. Okay, well I will bring her tomorrow, and then I will be off on my quest", replied Tom.
"Anytime Tom" replied Big Mac, "we will see you tomorrow. I still have a ton of thing that need doing, but we will see you."
"Okay thanks guys, bye". With this, Tom embarked back home, and told Sweetie Belle the good news. He went to bed early to prepare for his great adventure, and then he dreamed about poop. Why poop? Well, dudes and dudets I don't like know, but he dreamed of poop nonetheless.
Tom awoke early the next morning. He got Sweetie Belle up and rushed over to Sweet Apple Acres. When he got there, every pony was awake and ready to greet Sweetie Belle and Tom. Tom thanked every pony, said goodbye to Sweetie Belle, and then he was off on an adventure. He headed through the Everfree Forest as that was the quickest route to Canterlot. Of course, I am sure that most of the audience is all like, "well wait, what about the train". Well, listen audience, the reason Tom didn't take the train is because the train was way too girly, and if a rock was ever seen in that, he would probably be destroyed. Two was because the villain like made sure no one was allowed on the train. Three was because this story has to be longer, and because that is how the boss man wants it, so don't question the story. Anyways, Tom walked over to the Everfree Forest. He looked inside, but he wasn't scared. Why wasn't Tom scared? Well, Tom wasn't scared because Tom is a rock, and rocks don't get very scared. Anyways, Tom entered the deep, dark forest. His journey began.
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The Tree of Despicableness (if that's even a word)
Tom crept through the Everfree forest. Things now started to come out as night started to settle the scene. Things began to howl, and to snap, to bite, and to crawl. Of course, Tom wasn't scared because he was a rock, but if any other pony were in this forest, well, they would be as scared as a scared pony. I never saw one so I don't know how ponies get scared or act when they are scared. Anyways, however, this scene was setting up the beginning of a rock's destiny. A rock who had a name. An average one, but a name that was solid. He was Tom, and he wasn't going to let any forest scare him, and especially not the Everfree Forest...
Tom crept through Hangponie's bog. It was a nasty place. Apparently, during the War of HeadStrong's Mane, this was a place where ponies could choose death by hanging or to try and live out there days in the Everfree Forest. Every single one chose death. Ya man or woman, very scary place. Anyways, here is the beginning of the first beast which Tom had to fight to learn his destiny. It all began like this.
Night was on its way, and Tom would need somewhere to sleep. He saw a dark cave, and he decided that he would take his rest over there. However, as he was rolling to the cave, he heard a faint, but mysterious voice. It began like this.
"Tom...Tom... Do not take your journey into there. It will only bring you shame, but come over here to where that rosebush is, and there you will find your place of rest."
The voice actually almost scared Tom, but like said practically thirty times in this story, Tom was a rock, and so he didn't fear anything. Tom said something back to the mysterious voice.
"Show yourself mysterious voice, and then perhaps I will decide upon going over to that rosebush!", Tom yelled back to the voice.
"But Tom...", said the voice, "I am showing my self everywhere. I am here. I am there. I am in your underwear. Actually, forget the underwear bit. I am not there, but I am here.", the mysterious voice came back louder, and more creepy this time.
"That doesn't tell me much mysterious voice. Where are you? Show yourself or die by my blade which I don't have."
"If you do not have a blade, then why should I be afraid of you!", the mysterious voice shot back.
"Because I am a rock, and let me tell you something, you don't want to mess with a rock because if you do, well, then harm will come to you!"
"Oh really Tom, well let me ask you something... I want you to give back the slab which you stole, and then I want you to admit to me that you are a worthless piece of junk. Nothing. Rocks always lose. They can't do anything. They may try and try, but they will always fail. You crack under pressure, you break from a hammer. What are you really worth Tom?", the voice was getting more and more sinister.
"Now listen here!", shot back Tom, "I may be a rock. I may not be able to do things, but I am who I am and I am proud of that. I am not scared of you. God made me who I am, and for that I will be proud! At least I can show my face! I don't see you showing yours!".
Before continuing the story, there must be a pause. All of you reading, you must realize that you are you. You all have a specific purpose in this life and like bro's and sis's, live it to the fullest and thank God everyday that he allows you to live. Rock on dudes! Rock on! Alright, well, back to the conversation.
"WHAT!!!", the mysterious voice was getting angry, "Well you know what. You are nothing! You will melt away and be destroyed! You can't even lift! You--YOU!! You piece of hard headed junk. What are you worth! What?". The mysterious voice was getting despicable. It was trying to hit the very heart of Tom's soul. The tree was trying to break his heart of gold, his kidneys of emeralds, his mind of rubies, but Tom wouldn't take it. Tom knew he wasn't the most handsome rock on the outside. He knew that most didn't think he was pretty. Most rocks weren't beautiful, but its not the outside of a person that defines him, it is the inside. You see what is a beautiful face going to matter when you are 345 years old. It will be nothing. It will be dust, but what will matter is what you did in your heart. That is what matters, and Tom knew that.
"Listen here you mysterious voice! I may not be pretty. I may be rough on the outside. I may not have good looks or flowing hair, but here is what I do have; I have a family that loves me, and is learning to love me. I have a heart that will not hurt anybody, but tries as best as it can to help others. I have a mind that can think, and a working arm. I may not have all those things on the outside, but on the inside, I am worth a million diamonds." Tom was correct. He was worth a million diamonds (and not just figuratively). You see, we must do what we can to make the world a better place. Also, while you are living people, enjoy your families because one day you mat not have them. Lets move on with the conversation.
"YOU!!! YOU!!!! YOU ARE A DUMB ROCK!! YOU ARE WORTH NOTHING. NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL NEVER AMOUNT TO ANYTHING! YOU WILL FALL AWAY IN PIECES, AND YOU WILL DIE IN THIS FOREST!!!!! DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!", the mysterious voice was enraged. He hated Tom, but he was a coward. He would not show himself, and he would not discuss a matter with Tom personally. This is why Tom didn't believe him. Tom didn't care what this mysterious voice accused him of. Tom was Tom, and this voice was this voice. Tom was not selfish, and this voice was selfish. Tom felt bad for this voice. He really did, and because Tom felt bad for this voice, he decided to try and help him.
"Dear mysterious voice, I know not what you have gone through in years past. I don't know if someone hurt you, but I feel bad for you mysterious voice. I truly do. Listen my dear friend, I hope that whatever you went through, you can forgive the person who did you the wrong, and that you can forgive yourself. I must needs continue on my journey, but I truly hope that you will find peace in knowing that you are you. You are what God has made you. I also hope that you can find peace in knowing that the outside is not what matters, but the inside. Good luck to you dear friend and God bless! I must needs go now." As Tom began to embark, the mysterious voice became known. You see, Tom had just heaped coals upon the head of this evildoer. Tom could have just been just as mean as this culprit. He could have mocked him back or did who knows what else, but Tom didn't. Tom forgave, and tried to help this poor soul. Tom also could have wasted his time with this culprit, but Tom knew that he was who he was, and because of this Tom went on feeling even better. In fact this culprit had helped Tom realize more and more that he is who he is, and he should be proud of that. Now you're probably all wondering who the culprit was, well, in the next paragraph you will find out.
As Tom began to walk away, he heard some very loud screaming and anger coming from the voice. He turned around and saw a tree burning up. Tom realized that it was the tree who had tried to mock him. The tree began to burn, and eventually fell prey to its own hate. It died. However, Tom did not feel a victory over defeating this tree, but instead a compassion. Tom felt bad that this poor tree had to die in his hate, anger, and bitterness, but Tom realized that there was nothing he could do. Tom moved on. Little did he know, that what had just come to him would prepare him for the next evil of the forest.
To summarize, my dear readers, remember that throughout life, people will mock you. However, do not hate them, but try to help them out of their circumstances. Also, always remember that you are who God made you, so do not care what others think, but instead, live your life, but live your life the life that God gave you. Finally, remember to never let hate build in your heart, and to love your family and enjoy your youth while you can. That is all for now, and in the next chapter, the evil will be greater. Will Tom defeat it? Find out next time, and to close like a Japanese manga, TO BE CONTINUED...
Tom continued his quest deeper and deeper into the Everfree Forest. As he went deeper and deeper, it got eviler and eviler. For example, as he went deeper in, there were less hot dog carts. A sad, sad thing, but like we all know, the deeper you went into the Everfree, the more of a slave you became. Mwhahahahahahaha....Okay, I am done so back to the story.
Tom continued on his journey. He opened his map (which he could tel was a mess of crayon drawings and scribbles, but was still readable. He realized he was at the halfway point now so he put away the map and continued about three more miles before running into two strangers. One a fox and one a serpent of a sort. They were both dressed in fancier clothes and they both had a carriage of sorts. Tom greeted them.
"Hello sirs!", yelled Tom, "How are you this evening?".
"Oh my oh my", barked the fox, "It looks like we have a customer. How are you dear sir? Would you like some water for your journey?".
"Yes yes", hissed the serpent, "some water or perhaps some food. Maybe even a blanket or sleeping bag, it does get mighty cold in these here woods."
"No no", said Tom, "I am fine, really."
"Oh my dear Clever" hissed the serpent to the fox, "It seems he is beyond the point of no return. He's already delusional. Crazy. Insane. He can't even think straight. We needs get him this device here...For $32.99 of course."
"Yes yes me dear brother Hiss", barked the fox to his comrade, "This poor soul is already out if it. Let us make you a deal poor soul so that you will not fare horribly in this forest of darkness. Come, come, and get what you want. We will make a deal from there."
"No no", said Tom, "I am fine honest. I am a rock after all, and so I don't require much. In fact, thank you for the offer, but I be--"
"My dear boy", hissed the serpent who's name was Hiss, a Mr. Hiss at that, "We can not let you travel alone. We are just too compassionate. I am sorry my dear boy, but we can not let you go without something." hissed the serpent.
"Okay then", said Tom, "Give it to me for free, and I will believe you.", Tom was playing his cards.
"Well, actually dear sir", interrupted the fox, who's name was Clever, "We just can't let you go without something, but business is business as it were, and so we will let you off with a deal. How does that sound?"
"Listen here", said Tom, "I don't know what you're selling (Its funny because Tom really didn't), but I will not take your business junk. Either you give me something for free or I leave. Simple as that."
"But-- But-- Kind sir, we can not let you go alone. It is too dangerous in this hear hundred acre wood. It might even be more sir. the Everfree forest is an evil place especially at night. We must not let you go without something." hissed Hiss the serpent.
"Yes yes, my comrade is right. It is too dangerous to go alone and do you really want to be forever alone.", barked Clever, "Here let us make a deal. Does that sound promising?"
"Listen here... I will take time to look at your items, but if they displease me, I am leaving. Do you both understand?" questioned Tom.
"Yes." Both Clever and Hiss agreed.
"Good", said Tom, "Now what pieces of junk do you have here?".
The Fox and the Serpent showed Tom all sorts of amazing things. They showed him attachable wings, and they showed him laser weapons, and they showed him crazy fire beams, and ice cream, and portable Spongebob grenades which would annoy the poop out of enemies. They showed him all sorts of junk. Tom was impressed. However, Tom wasn't buying it literally. He told it to the business animals straight.
"Listen, your stuff is very impressive, but I am not going to buy it. It is simple as that. I don't even have money to--" Tom was interrupted.
"What?!", barked Clever, "You don't have money!! Get out of here! We don't like your kind!" yelled Clever who was very angry at Tom.
"Yessssssss" said Hiss, "No money, no business, we don't like any one who wastes our time, and you just wasted it big, big time! You need to leave right now!" At this, both Hiss and Clever pulled out two pistols which they had been hiding. They pointed them at Tom's face and aimed. "LEAVE!" they both said in unison.
"Woah fellas, I just was sa--" started Tom.
"LEAVE!!!" they yelled at Tom. "NOW!!"
Tom left. He rolled away mildly fast, not because he was scared (remember rocks don't get scared), but because he realized how much time he had wasted. It must have been two days talking to those buffoons and they would have tried to kill him if he hadn't left. Tom was actually getting furious. He was about to go back and take those two out when he heard a bang. He slowly crept back and found that Hiss and Clever had killed a poor, lonely pony who had ventured too far into their depths. Tom eavesdropped as the Hiss and Clever began to speak.
"Ha ha ha" hissed Hiss, "That dumb old pony. We had her buy an item, and then we killed her. It never gets old Clever. Oh how treacherous we are. We get the money, go to give them the item, and then we kill them, and now we have the money and the item. Its a one way streak. Killing tow birds with one stone, only literally. It is too fun Clever old boy too fun."
"Yes yes Hiss", started Clever to his companion, "It is too fun, and the things don't even know that most of this is just junk from China anyways. It breaks in two seconds. Oh ho how I love it. Wait wait look here comes another idiot. Quick move that body and prepare for the next one."
"YESSSSSSS:" Hissed Hiss laughing.
The poor pony started on her way over to the fox and the serpent. Tom recognized her. It was none other than Roseluck. How she had ended up over here, Tom didn't know, but he continued to watch to see the scene unfold.
"Hello ms.", barked Clever, "What brings you out here in this deep dark forest. You must be frightened."
"Ye--yes sir", began Roseluck, " I-- I am very frightened. Could you help me?"
"Of course", hissed Hiss, "We can sell you some items that will get you right back on your feet. In fact, here take a look see. We have all manner of items here and--"
"Hiss", started Clever, "I have a deal I need to put forth for this pony... lets go and discuss it then?"
"Oh of course Clever my dear boy", began Hiss, and then he turned to the pony, "One second ma'am, we are feeling so generous today that we want to strike you a deal."
"Oh thank you sirs", began Roseluck, "Thank you."
"Oh but of course", barked Clever, "Hang on while I go over there and discuss a good deal with my partner here."
Hiss and Clever began to walk over to where Tom was. Tom hid in the bush a little bit, but Hiss and Clever did not come all the way. They were still in ear distance though, so Tom listened. Clever and Hiss's conversation went like this.
"Hiss my boy, that pony is in perfect working condition. We can capture her, and then sell her to the orks. They can decide what to do with her from there, but he is in perfect condition." Clever put his plan forth.
"You are correct", hissed Hiss, "but we have to take her down. She is a pony and she will be able to get away from us. How do you propose we capture her?"
"Well", began Clever, "First we will say that we have the perfect item for her. However, we will turn around and gas her with sleeping dust. Then we will bring her to the holding area and finally tie her up and sell her at the Evil Auction. We'll make a fortune because someone will buy her perhaps even the Troll king himself."
"It is perfeccccccccct" hissed Hiss, "Lets do it!"
At this, Hiss and Clever went back to the pony and began to show her something. Tom knew their plan and he knew he could take these evildoers on, but should he act? Of course he should act, but that wasn't what was holding back Tom. You see, Roseluck was the meanest pony ever to Tom. She had mocked him, jeared at him, and even tried to smack him once. Not only that, but she had done other unspeakable horrors to Tom. Tom had a choice. It seems Tom had a lot of these lately. Tom chose quick. He would save her.
Tom rolled out of the bushes just as Roseluck had been gassed. Roseluck fell to the ground knocked out while Tom rushed Clever and Hiss. Clever was hit while Hiss dodged. Clever went flying into a nearby tree, and was knocked out momentarily. Hiss tried to retaliate and hit Tom hard in his back. Tom, however, was a rock and was solid enough to hold on tight. He smacked Hiss into an nearby tree just as Clever jumped on Tom's back. Clever started to choke Tom's neck withholding whatever it is a rock breathes. Tom started to faint, but he held on. He slammed Clever into a nearby tree, but Hiss was already back. Hiss pulled out his pistol and yelled at Tom to stop or he would shoot the pony. Tom turned around and saw that Hiss had Roseluck's legs tied up in a knot, and Hiss had his pistol pointing at Roseluck.
"Don't make me do it rock!", hissed Tom, "Because you obviously know that I will".
Tom did know. He knew full well. However, Tom said something.
"Don't make me do it either!". Tom rolled back over to where Clever was knocked out and started to roll on top of Clever. Clever started to groan for help.
"You won't do it rock!" hissed Hiss, "I know you won't"
"You're right", began Tom, "but I will do this." Tom fired Clever's pistol at Hiss's face. Hiss dodged it just for a moment giving Tom just enough time to charge Hiss. Hiss's pistol was knocked to the ground, and Hiss was soon to follow. At this point, both Hiss and Clever were knocked out. Tom took this as the time to tie them up to a tree. Tom then picked up Roseluck and put her in a carriage backpack on his back. He knew she wasn't dead just knocked out. Tom would have brought her back, but he didn't have time to turn around so, for now, she would have to deal with it. Tom also knew that Clever and Hiss would be stuck there for a while hopefully giving them enough time to rethink their evil ways. If not, then something else would get them first, this would be Opal. Tom and Opal were actually good friends, and Tom knew that everybody feared Opal, so if the fox and serpent caused anymore trouble, then Opal they would have to deal with.
Tom continued on his journey. He was coming on the final villain. This one was going to be the worst (after of course the final final villain). Tom was ready to face this one, but this time he had to be more cautious.
As Tom continued on he learned some new lessons. They were these. First of all, always forgive those that do you wrong just as Jesus did. It is kind to forgive, and it will only heap coals of fire upon their heads because they won't be able to take the fact that you just gave all to save them. Not only that though, you gave all to save them even though they mistreated you. The second lesson that Tom learned was to be wary of liars and smooth talkers because they will only bring you trouble. Also No is No, if you say No then they will have to respect that. The third lesson that Tom learned was to stand up for others and to stop criminals. Finally, the final lesson Tom learned is, Never trust a business man.
Tom was learning lessons left and right. They were good though because they were preparing Tom for what he would soon face ahead and ahead...
Tom was coming at the end of the forest. He was almost there. He could even see the light which was, in his case, a very good thing. However, as everyone should know, nothing ever can just finish smooth. No, in fact, there always has to be a bump in the road. Its like a banana. We can't just eat them in peace, and be done with them. Now, we have to walk the streets, and make sure we don't trip over the peel because some loser couldn't take two seconds to throw it out. Ya, that is what stories are like. There is always that random banana peel just lurking about seeking whom it may trip. Anyways, Roseluck awoke, and found herself on Tom's backpack. She started to question what had happened and Tom shared everything. He even shared about the time he lost his arm in a fight with mineral diggers. It was crazy. Anywho (see not anyways), Roseluck was very thankful for Tom saving her. Tom was happy to see that she was happy and safe, but told her that she had to continue on with Tom because it was too dangerous for her to go alone, and Tom frankly didn't have anything to give her for her journey. Roseluck didn't mind. They continued on.
It was about two hour's more into the journey. The light was like blinding, man, like even now I am wearing a welding mask. Tom went on his way when out of nowhere, a random rock came out of the bush. It was one of Tom's brothers. Tom greeted him.
"Hello there brother of mine! How are you?", asked Tom.
"Fine, fine, Here why don't you come in and see what I have to eat. Your journey must have been long Tom, was it not?", asked the rock.
"Oh yes brother of mine it was, but what is your name first?", questioned Tom.
"I am William.", the rock said. You all must understand that rocks did not choose crazy names like Poopface the Third or like Farah Hamed Jahdidier or Big Headed Obstinate Loser. Rocks were simple folk, and so they enjoyed their names like Tom, Will, Bob, or something along those lines. Anywho, Roseluck did not trust this rock, and whispered this to Tom.
"Tom, maybe we shouldn't follow this rock. He looks... He worries me.", said Roseluck.
"Oh Roseluck, don't worry. I am sure that if he tries anything, I can stop him.", responded Tom to Roseluck.
"Okay, Tom... I will trust you", said Roseluck to Tom.
Both Roseluck and Tom ventured into the cave where Will lived. It was dark, and as they ventured further in, the more they couldn't see. This is when it happened. Yes, that is right, it happened. Boom, there was a quick burst before Tom was knocked to the ground. Then another rock jumped on top of him, and punched him hard in the face. How he did it? I don't know, Remember this is a story and so it defies physics and crap. Anyways, Tom was blinded and unable to see. Then he heard Roseluck scream, and then everything went dark (even though it already was), but this time it went dark, like lights out man, for Tom.
Tom awoke by a fire. He was in a cage of some sort. When he finally came to all of his senses, all he could see was a whole bunch of rocks near a spit. You know, I just have to interrupt real quick and say that I wonder why they called it a spit. I mean seriously. Why would anyone name something after something so gross, especially since you cook on it. Man, and not even that-- Wait! Unless animals named it a spit, then that would make more sense. The animals would hope that no one would use it because of its vulgar name. Its a conspiracy man. All makes sense now. Anyways, back to the story. On this spit was none other than Roseluck. She was being a cooked. It was not right, but Tom realized that he had run into a group of Rock Cannibals. These cannibals loved to eat pony meat. It was disgusting, but Tom realized that he should have listened to Roseluck. Now Roseluck would be killed, and Tom would slowly become one of these despicable cannibals. Unless, thought Tom, unless he could get out of this cage. How? Well, stop asking and lets see what Tom does.
Tom yelled over to one of the rocks.
"Excuse me sir", yelled Tom, "but could you possibly let me out. I am terribly hungry, and could really go for some pony meat!", finished Tom.
"Ogga Booga You wanta meata!", screamed the rock cannibal Tom was speaking to.
"Yes sir, I am so very hungry! I could go for a ton of pony meat. Here let me out, and let me help you cook this very fine specimen." Tom was playing his cards right (I mean who would ever play cards left anyways too bland.).
"Ooka Mokka Okaya dokiea I willa letta you outta", said the tribal dude. The tribal dude went over to Tom ,and popped the cage door open. Then Tom and him went to the spit where Roseluck was. Tom took one of the arms of the spit and did whatever the equivalent of a wink is for a rock to Roseluck. At this, Roseluck knew she was safe. Tom waited about one more minute, and then put his plan into action.
Tom grabbed the spit, and threw it up. He rolled over tow of the guards knocking them down to the floor. he then quickly caught Roseluck. Music also started to play from the heavens. However, everyone paused the first time because the music was Scooby-Doo when it was supposed to be something else. However, the DJ fixed this quickly, and the chase began.
Tom caught Roseluck on his arms. He then started to roll away very quickly as Rock spears started to hit very close to both Roseluck and Tom. Then Two more guards came out of the sides of some random walls. Tom took both of them down, and then grabbed the spear of one. He threw it at a nearby guard who fell back instantly stunned. Tom continued to roll hard and fast. He was coming up on the exit. He could see the light. However, the rock cannibals had one more trick up their sleeves or whatever they wear. They unleashed the Rock Lion. It roared right in front of Tom and Roseluck as it jumped into their path. Roseluck screamed and Tom, well, he's a rock. Tom punched one of the tribal dudes, and took his spear. He thrust it into the mouth of the Rock lion. It went into the rock lion's throat, and then the thing started to choke. It crumpled to the ground, and then blew up and died. It was actually pretty easy. Not only was it easy, all of the rock cannibals were so crushed that they just fell down, and started doing crunches saying, "Future...Future", just as Squidward did when he traveled to the future.
The rock cannibals taking a break or whatever they were doing gave Tom and Roseluck enough time to get away. They both ran away, and entered back into the forest. Finally, they were home free. Tom and Roseluck ran all the way out of the Everfree. Tom even shed a tear once he got out of there. He was so happy. He was out of the Everfree. He was out of the mess which it was. Most importantly, he was done with all of this evil. He could continue on and save everypony. He had learned another lesson too. Tom had learned that whatever situation you may find yourself in, always use the brain which God gave you to get out. Also, do not just trust anyone even if they are your brother but be wise.
Anyways, Tom had learned the three lessons which he would need to defeat the final monster which is... comin gin the next chapter. Ha ha you thought I was going to spoil it. Nope, not at all, Alright so Tom untied Roseluck from the spit, and then they began walking to Canterlot. It was here that Tom would soon discover his destiny. He would also fight the hardest enemy he was ever going to fight. Good luck Tom, Good luck because you are going to need it. You are going to need it.
Canterlot was...in a pot.
It took another thirty minutes before Tom and Roseluck made it into Canterlot, but when they did, Canterlot was... well, Canterlot just wasn't Canterlot...At all. I mean like dudes and dudets, there was like death destroyed buildings and junk all over the place. You had like messed up towns and like buildings with shattered glass and like ghost towns and everything. Dudes and dudets it was like crazy. Oh and then the sky was all like gray and like cloudy and stuff, man, if only you could have seen it. Anyways, I always did wonder how that happened. I mean think about it... How in the world does a city go from being beautiful to like a dump in three days. It amazes me. I mean maybe if it was like three hundred years or something, but in three days or a week, I mean was the evil super villain dude really that bad. Seriously?! Anyways, I am sure that the audience has ants in their pants and wants to see this story finished. I am sure that they want to see how Tom saves everypony and how he gets things and what his destiny is. I am sure that the au--
"Hey narrator!?", asked the audience.
HOLD YOUR HORSES AUDIENCE!!! Alright, well, let me get back to the story at hand. Tom started to head for the city gates. He was stopped, however, because two scorpion guards stood before him. They asked Tom and Roseluck a question.
"Where are your passes?", asked the first one, "Let us see them now or you may not enter!", he yelled.
"Well", began Tom, "I actually don't have a pass, but--"
"No pass No entrance!", screamed the second guard, "Get out!", he finished.
Just as Tom began to turn around, trying to think of a plan to enter in, Roseluck told him to wait.
"Tom, hold on!", yelled Roseluck, "I have a pass." Roseluck then turned back to the two scorpion guards and gave them her pass. She also said that Tom was with her. The scorpion guards looked at her, the pass, Tom, and each other, and finally decided to let Tom and Roseluck in. Tom and Roseluck both entered, and here begins the beginning of the end.
The scene was a mess. On every corner, block, and street there were five guards. They were all scorpions. Tom wondered why every single guard was a scorpion and he wondered what had happened to the Royal Guard soldiers. Tom had a lot of questions. I mean Tom was a nice rock and all, but sometimes he could be just a tiny bit, well, just a tiny bit impatient. It wasn't a rocks big suit to be patient, but patience could be learned, and for now, Tom would have to wait upon his questions. Anyways, Tom dropped off Roseluck at the train station, and he told her that he had to finish this journey on his own. Roseluck, who actually wanted to help Tom, understood. She thanked Tom again for saving her, wished him good luck, and finally, kissed Tom on his equivalent to a cheek (I'm sorry I don't know much about rock anatomy, but I just never really paid much attention during Rock anatomy class), and finally she left. It was up to Tom now. He had to get into the castle, Celestia's castle that is. Tom knew this was going to be fun, and fun it was going to be.
Tom headed for the castle. He had to be pretty secretive because there was like a scorpion guard on every corner. It was like 1984, but in a story about Tom. Anyways, Tom didn't have to beat anybody up...yet, but he did have to take the sewer at one point. It all started like this.
Tom turned around one corner, and then just out of nowhere two scorpion guards came around. Tom could tell by the patch on their arms that they were border patrol soldiers. They would have stopped Tom in a heart beat, and he would have been arrested in two. Tom quickly jumped to the side. However, just as he hit the side of the wall, he noticed two more soldiers (these ones were normal) who started to walk down where Tom was hiding. Tom knew that if they found him hiding there, then they would have questioned his hiding. Basically, either way Tom went, he would have been stopped and then punished. Tom wasn't quite sure what to do when he realized a sewer vent. He knew he had one shot, and he was missing it right now. He decided to take it. He jumped into the sewer vent, and landed with a splash into so much muck and disgusting things that he almost cried, but rocks don't normally cry so he didn't. Tom looked up and saw both of the scorpion soldiers greet each other and then they turned away and left. Tom was going to start climbing up the ladder, but then he realized that it was broken. Tom realized that there was only one thing left to do. Tom had to go through the sewers and then go up into the castle. It was a good thing that Tom was once a plumber and sewer fixer or else he might have never known the ways of the sewer. Tom took his right because he knew that was the way into the castle.
As Tom walked for what seemed like hours, he saw two scorpion guards. They were standing right in front of the only path into the castle. Tom knew that if he was to make it into the castle then he would have to fight all of these guards. The problem was that these specific guards were much bigger than the average soldier. There was also another problem. It was that just as Tom was about to charge these two guards, two more came into Tom's sight and one of them was a leader. Tom, however, decided that it may have been now or never so he charged.
Tom was yelling and screaming his charge down the road. Quickly, I must interrupt and say that I don't get why you yelled when you charged. I believe General Custer said it best when he said that when you charge if you scream they will hear you. Wow, I just looked at that sentence and realized how much it didn't make sense. Man, I really ought to--
"Narrator!! Get back on Tra--", the audience began to interrupt.
SHUT UP AUDIENCE!!! I'm doing that right now. Man! Alright, so Tom was charging these guys, but just as Tom was within ten feet from them, a random white horse came rushing out. Tom realized it was a she, a female horse. Tom saw this horse kneeling (or whatever a horse does) looking at all the four guards who had her surrounded. The light that was coming partly through a hole from above shined on this horse. The horse had a whole Rambo get up. Tom stared at this horse trying to make her out because she looked very familiar. Then the horse looked up, and Tom recognized her. It was none other than...
It's Celestia!!!", the leader scorpion guard yelled, "The boss wants her alive. Get her!".
At that moment, all of the guards tried to pounce on Celestia. However, just as they jumped, Celestia jumped up, and landed on two with a thunk. She kicked one in the head, and punched the other one twice. Then, one of the guards went to grab Celestia, but he was too slow as Celestia jumped back doing an amazing backflip in slow-motion (How that happened, I don't know). Anyways, then Celestia grabbed the guard who missed her, and flung him back into the leader scorpion. The leader scorpion collapsed just as soon as he got up. Celestia turned around again and punched the one scorpion in the neck, and then grabbed the other scorpion by his arm. She flung him again. She also threw one of the scorpions right into pony poop. Tom actually chuckled a little bit. Anyways, Celestia was kicking these scorpion's butts. Literally. For example, one tried to grab her, but she pun around, dodged him, and then kicked him right in the butt. He then flew into more sewer muck. Celestia was good, but she was still no match for four especially big scorpions. These guys, remember, were like the size of the Hulk, Igor the Strong man, or Arnold Schwarzenegger. Your pick. Anyways, so Celestia was kicking their butts when she threw a flying roundhouse at the leader. The leader scorpion dodged the attack, and grabbed her leg. The leader then spun her around bringing her off balance. Celestia fell into the muck. She got up quickly, but not in enough time because as she got up to regain herself, one of the scorpion guards hit Celestia in the back of the neck knocking her to the ground. Then two other guards grabbed her by her front legs, and held her tight. She struggled, but she couldn't get free. The leader began to mock her too.
The leader grabbed her by the chin, and said, "Oh look at the poor pony princess. Look how she falls before our scorpion might...Poor Poor little pony princess girl, probably saw yourself ruling a wonderful kingdom, but I guess not now. Alright, lets take her back to the dungeon, and the boss, I am sure he will be pleased. Knock her out.", the leader scorpion finished. Then one of the scorpion soldiers raised her beefy arms, and was just about to hit Celestia when Tom began rolling and yelling again. You see Tom knew that he had to save Celestia because he needed to know what was going on, and just to save her. He charged.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH", yelled Tom. He crashed into the leader, and like threw the leader twelve feet back. Then Celestia saw this as a good chance so she spun around and did a backflip loosening the scorpion's grip on her even more. Then with her two hind legs, she tripped the scorpions. They both fell into the muck. Tom rolled over and hit the scorpion soldier, who was going to hit Celestia, right in his gut. The scorpion soldier fell back, knocked out.
"One down, three to go", thought Tom as him and Celestia were surrounded. Celestia and Tom were back to back and they were surrounded by the three scorpion soldiers. The whole scene was all like dramatic and junk. Anyways, Celestia whispered something to Tom.
"You ready to kick some tail?", she whispered to Tom.
"Correction", said Tom, "You ready to kick three tails?"
Celestia chuckled, and then threw herself on top of the leader with a flying punch kick. The leader went down, and him and Celestia were beating the crap out of each other. Tom, however, attacked his culprits very nicely. He threw himself on top of the first scorpion, knocking the soldier down into the muck. That soldier was knocked out instantly. The other soldier, however, grabbed Tom. Tom threw himself back into the muck, practically knocking the air out of the scorpion soldier behind him. The soldier wasn't totally knocked out though, and so he grabbed Tom by whatever Tom's leg would be. Tom went down hard into the muck. The soldier then jumped onto Tom, but Tom was able to quickly throw him back. The scorpion soldier went down hard, and hit a bar. Tom thought he was knocked out.
Tom got up, brushing himself up. He was about to turn around and go help Celestia. That didn't happen, however.
"Don't move rock!", yelled the scorpion leader to Tom, "Or else your little princess gets it". Tom turned around to see that the leader guy had Celestia pinned against a sewer wall. The leader also had his huge pincers around Celestia's neck.
"You wouldn't kill her!", said Tom.
"Oh really?", said the scorpion leader, "and why not?".
"Because", said Tom, "Because then your boss would find out that you killed the princess. How would you explain that to him?"
"Ha ha ha", laughed the scorpion, "Listen rock, I could say that she has never been found. That she died. I could say anything I wanted. It's not like he would ever find out."
Tom knew the leader was right. He could easily kill Celestia and get away with it. Tom had to think and he had to think fast. It was at that moment, though, that Tom heard a buzzing sound. He mildly looked back, and saw that the scorpion soldier who had hit the bar was not knocked out. The soldier was pointing his pistol at Tom. The soldier then pulled the trigger. Tom dodged. The blast hit the leader scorpion dead in the chest. The leader was killed, and Tom rolled himself very quickly into the soldier who had fired the gun's chest. The soldier was knocked out instantly. Tom then went over to help Celestia.
"Princess!", Tom yelled, "Are you alright?"
"Yes *cough cough* yes... I'll be fine." answered Celestia.
Tom helped Celestia up, and walked with her back to where Celestia was hiding out. He helped Celestia recover from her injuries, and fed her. Tom let her sleep, and when Celestia awoke about five hours later, Tom asked her what had happened to her. Celestia then began to tell the story of what had happened while Tom was gone...
Celestia the Commando!!
Tom waited about two days before Celestia finally felt better. He thought about going a few times by himself into the castle to save everyone, but he couldn't leave Celestia alone because she might need Tom's help, and Tom himself knew that he would need all the help he could get. Therefore, Tom waited. Finally, when Celestia did wake up and was much, much better, Tom gave her some of his famous (Not really but it did taste good) Goulash. Celestia enjoyed it like Celestia enjoyed that cake. Not only was Tom's Goulash delicious, it was also nutritious. Shut Up!! I didn't steal that from anywhere. Anyways, Tom asked Celestia how she got down here, and Celestia began her story.
"Well Tom", began Celestia, "It all started like this. I was reading the daily Canterlot newspaper like a week ago. I have always read the newspaper because I get bored being a high and mighty princess and all. Anyways, I felt a disturbance in the force. It was something I had never felt before (Oh and by the way just to interrupt Celestia and let you all know a little secret, Princess Celestia was a Jedi at heart). Anyways, Tom, so I was worried. It was like all the other times when some bad villain person came to Equestria. I knew something was coming. That is why I brought the gang together, you know, the main 6. It was at that time that battle began in the royal gardens. It was horrible. I peeked outside and saw the Scorpion soldiers fighting my royal soldiers. My soldiers fought bravely, but they were no match for the Scorpion soldiers. I thought we might lose very quickly, and we almost did. However, at that time, the main 6 finally made it to Canterlot, and more Royal soldiers came to reinforce our stallions. The tide of the battle soon turned as our stallions, the main 6, and I began fighting off the Scorpion soldiers. We had them on the run. Then, he came, the villain. He came with more soldiers, and with his powerful paralyzing tail. As the Scorpion soldier reinforcements began fighting our reinforcements, me and the main 6 began taking on this new villain. At first, it seemed like we would beat him, but then he used his powerful tail. He took out Applejack and Rainbow Dash first. They were knocked out. The elements then became of no use. Next, Rarity tried to use her magic to take down a statue to crush him, but he was so strong. He took the pedestal and flung it at my captain who was coming to reinforce me. My captain--he-- he died. (By the way, Princess Celestia is crying right now, and Tom is trying to comfort her). No! No Tom, I must continue. Okay, so then he grabbed Rarity, and hit her with his tail. She was knocked out, she was paralyzed for a while. The fight continued for what must have been thirty more minutes, but eventually, the villain took out all of the main 6. I must say, though, that Fluttershy put up a very good fight. She like knocked the scorpion back a few times, and even he was impressed. However, even poor Fluttershy was no match, and she went down. It was then just me and Twilight. Twilight hit him in the face with a very powerful beam. He was blinded for a while. I took this as my chance. I charged him, but he was able to knock me away. I went flying into a wall for a very small amount of time. Twilight started to run to me, but I told her to watch out. She turned around, and the villain was right behind her. He went to strike at her, but she dodged. She then blew him back with a powerful blast. The villain went flying back, his vision clouded. Twilight then hit him again and again and again. She was turning the tide. Then, Twilight missed. The villain saw it as his perfect opportunity. He struck Twilight with his tail, and she was knocked out, paralyzed. I was able to get up in time so I rushed over and knocked him back. I then used my magic to blow him back. The villain went flying back into a wall. I was his main match. Our battle continued for a while. I threw powerful beams at him, and he flung powerful beams right back at me. It was then that I made a wrong move. I went to strike him deep in the heart, but he turned around, and hit me hard against the back of my neck. I went flying into the nearby statue of my great great grandfather, King Founder. I was too weak to get up. The villain began to walk over to me. However, Discord had finally gotten out. He rushed the villain. It was funny Tom, Discord was always there to save me (Celestia and Discord had dated, and almost got married way back when). Discord pounded the villain into the ground so many times that I am surprised he didn't fall. However, the villain struck Discord square in his chest. Discord flew back almost thirty feet into a cement carving of Shining Armor. Discord was still strong and got right back up, and pounded the villain hard into the ground. Discord then used one of his most powerful beams and sent the villain crashing into a nearby greenhouse. The whole place collapsed on top of the villain. Discord slowly walked over to the place. It was his downfall. A huge beam came rushing out of the collapsed greenhouse, and hit Discord square in his face. Discord went flying back, and crashed into a nearby wall. He was knocked out instantly. The villain then got up, and skulked over to me. He then hit me with his tail, and everything went dark. I was paralyzed."
"Is that all, princess? How did you get out of there?", Tom interrupted.
"No Tom that is not all. Here I will continue. I awoke in a dungeon. I was chained up in special cuffs that would not allow me to use my magic. There were also at least five guards stationed around my cell door. I didn't know where the main 6, Discord, or anypony else was, so for now I was on my own. I basically sat there, and I was treated very poorly. It took around five days before I was able to escape. On the fifth day, I did. It went like this. One of the guards had accidentally dropped his keys, and he didn't notice. He had also dropped him inside the prison. I was able to get the keys, and I was able to unlock my cuffs. I then used my magic to open the door, and with that, I was able to come out. I was too weak to fight off all five guards, but thankfully, they were not there. They had to go eat lunch. I was then able to get outside without being detected. I had to go outside, though, through one of the vents that my father had built during the Rebellion years. I snuck out through the vent and ended up in the sewer. Thankfully, I had memorized the patterns and structure when I was a filly. I used this to find out a place to hide. Then, I retrained myself in the art of fighting normally. Every princess you know must know some type of Ka-ra-te. After about three more days, I was going to head back up to fight the scorpion. However, I had to get through those guards. As you know from there, I almost got recaptured, but you saved me Tom. For that, I am very thankful. Not only that, but you saved me three times. Tom, you are a very nice rock." Celestia had finished with her story.
"Thank--Thank you Princess. It is my duty.", said Tom although he was partially sobbing. He came to realize that there were more people who liked him than he knew. For that, he was very grateful.
"Tom", said Celestia, "Do you think that you and I are ready to go back and take back the castle?"
"We had better be", began Tom," because I am going tomorrow whether I am ready or not".
This was true. Tomorrow, Tom and Celestia would embark upon their final journey. Tom was heading into the belly of the beast, the pit of the Sarlac. This was going to be a dangerous ride, but Tom loved danger. It was time. Tom and Celestia went to sleep. They both had to get their rest for tomorrow because tomorrow was going to be the end of the beginning of the end.
It was finally time. Yes, that's right, it was finally time for me to eat my sandwich. Hey, I mean I get hungry to you know. Anyways, so there you have it. I made myself a nice turkey sandwich and I ate chocolate hershey's junk. Ya, my life was good right about then, now, however, I have to go back to telling my story so here I go. The story time she comes. Alright, so Tom and Celestia woke up early. They packed all of their junk and then left. It was time. They headed past the first guard station easily. In fact, they got past every guard station easily. I mean there was like only two, and one wasn't even on duty. Ha ha that's funny, duty, because get it everyone is in a sewer right now. Ha ha!! Okay back to the story. Tom and Celestia headed for the exit. The main sewer exit was right underneath the castle. Why? Ask Celestia she is right here!
"Narrator! I told you a thousand times before, I didn't mean to have it installed there! Luna, my younger sister, accidentally messed up and put it there!", said Celestia.
Ya ya whatever you say Celestia! Ha ha. Okay, so Tom and Celestia went up to the top. The light was like practically blinding. They both had to like shield their eyes for like 20 seconds man. They were in the sewers. I mean you try living in the sewers for like twenty days. It ain't easy. Finally, though, they both came up through the entrance. There were three guards around, but the guards didn't notice them. Tom and Celestia continued down the hallway.
When they turned their first corner, better known as Celestia's private cake room, they--
"Narrator!! How could you tell them that!", again interrupted Celestia.
Listen, Celestia baby, no need to worry. I mean who doesn't have a private cake room, oh yeah, I don't because I only get paid like a dollar an hour! Stop complaining Celestia, you should be stinking happy. Anywho, Celestia and Tom went through the cake room. It was empty. Apparently, the main villain dude didn't like cake.
"I do too!", interrupted the main villain dude.
Listen, main villain dude, Just shut up! You aren't suppose to come in until the end of this chapter so stop whining! I understand you like cake, sheesh, what is it with everybody interrupting me! Back to the story, Tom and Celestia continued through the castle. For some reason, it was very much deserted except for the occasional guard. Tom was getting sand crystals in his pants, even though Tom didn't wear pants. However, Tom and Celestia knew that they had to continue and so they did without question.
When Tom and Celestia finally made it to the hall before Celestia's throne room, Tom stopped.
"Wait", began Tom, "Something isn't right. I feel like we're being watched Celestia."
"Oh Tom, stop whining, It will be fine", began Celestia. That is when she turned the corner.
BOOM!! Celestia was thrown back with a huge blast. Tom quickly turned around the corner and saw two squads of Scorpion Guards. A squad, by the way, of scorpion soldiers has about 12 men each. Tom had to take on every single one by himself because Celestia was knocked out. Tom had to protect her, and save everybody else. This was Tom's fight and his alone.
The scorpion soldiers fired three more blasts from their plasma launchers. One hit the wall and blew it apart. The other two totally missed Tom. Tom charged the Soldiers, and rolled heavily into them. They were all firing their blasts from their heavy rifles, but they were not able to hit Tom because he was too fast. Those blasts that did hit Tom didn't do too much damage. Tom hit three and they all went flying into the gun. The gun then fired and blew back ten of the soldiers. There was basically one squad left, and now Tom had to take them on face to face.
One of the soldiers went to strike Tom, but Tom quickly dodged and hit that soldier square in the face. The soldier flew back and crashed through a bunch of glass. The glass shattered, and the soldier fell into the courtyard down below. The courtyard, of course like in every story, was teeming with tons of Scorpion soldiers. Now, Tom had to fight those soon. This was a great day for Tom.
Tom quickly snapped out of his focus upon the other things. He smashed himself into two soldiers, and they crashed against the wall. They were knocked out, and they weren't waking up for a while. Then two other scorpion soldiers grabbed Tom, but Tom knew his wrestling moves well, and so he threw himself back hard against the floor. He crushed those scorpions like bugs. Ohhhh puns. Anyways, now there were only 6 scorpion soldiers left. This was going to be it. Tom threw himself at two, but those two dodged him. They fired both their rifles, but Tom was able to dodge. Tow other scorpion soldiers behind Tom were not so lucky. They both got hit hard, and they both went down. Tom took the opportunity to crash into these two who had just tried firing at him. They tried to shoot him again, but they were not able to hit him. They both went flying back with a crash. Tom did the math in his head, and realized there were still two left, but where were they. Then Tom heard a loud BZZZZ followed by a BABOOSH! Tom went flying into a wall, not three feet from a window. Tom was a rock, and so he was able to take it, but even a rock like Tom couldn't take everything. If Tom took another blast like that, he would have been knocked out. Tom got up, and dodged a second blast. He rolled very quickly into one of the soldiers operating the gun. This soldier was knocked out instantly. Tom turned to the other soldier who was a sergeant. Tom went to roll him over, but the soldier dodged. The soldier then pulled out his blaster and fired hard. Tom flew back because the blaster hits were too furious especially in Tom's weakened state. However, Tom was still strong enough to pull himself together. Tom grabbed one of the knocked out scorpion soldier's blasters and fired three shots. They all struck the sergeant square in the chest. The sergeant went down instantly.
Finally, Tom had finished the battle. He rolled back over to Celestia who was just waking up. Tom helped her up. She, in turn, gave Tom a healing field. Tom felt much better because all of his wounds were healed. Now, it was time to go and fight the super villain. Tom and Celestia walked over to the doors of the throne room. Celestia kicked them in, and there he was, the main villain.
"Ahhhhh, well, would you look at this", began the main villain, "It seems Celestia returns to try and fight me! ME!! Well, Celestia, we will see who will be doing the fighting here. And, who is this rock that you bring, oh wait, I know, this rock is the only one who has been able to take on all of my soldiers. Well then what is your name, sir?" finished the main villain.
"My name", began Tom, "Is Tom."
"Tom the Rock! What a nice name! You know I have been watching you Tom, and I must say that you will be a worthy opponent. Let us let this fight begin shall we?"
At this moment, the villain turned around from the throne chair he was sitting in. He revealed himself as Scorpius, the leader of the Scorpus Empire. He was decked in armor. This leader villain, known as Scorpius, had gold plated armor shins coverings. He was decked in the most rare metals that you could think of. He had a sword the size of the throne. His tail was so sharp that the very looking up at it could paralyze you. This scorpion leader, this main villain, this Scorpius was fearsome in his power. He was strong, wise, smart, powerful, bold, and just plain crazy. He couldn't be stopped. He was just invulnerable. He was only 6 inches.
"WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????", screeched Tom, "You couldn't take on this guy! I mean look at him! I could squash him accidentally if I wanted to! What is wrong with you guys! I mean seriously!!!"
"Oh Tom", began Celestia, "Why? Why did you have to say that?"
It was true. Tom shouldn't have said that because as soon as he did, well, it happened. Scorpius grew until he was twice the size of Tom. Scorpius was now over thirty feet. EEEYUP That is right, Stories, the irony. Anyways, Tom really put his foot in his mouth there.
"Well........", said Tom, "Well....."
"Now Tom", began Scorpius, " I know of your friends. The main 6, am I correct?"
"What have you done with them?!", yelled Celestia.
"Oh nothing", began Scorpius, "They are in their cells. However, I would love for them to see me defeat both of you, so, I am presuming that it is time that they see!".
At this, Scorpius pressed a button, and from the ground came all of the main 6. They were all chained up, and in orbs cells so that they could not move. Then Scorpius pressed another button, and up came Discord. He too had the same treatment as the main 6. Scorpius again turned toward Tom and Celestia. He spoke.
"Before I kick both of your butts, I might be inclined to ask if there would be anything you might like to say to these here friends of yours. Anything anything at all?"
"Well", began Tom, "I have nothing to say."
"Okay...", said Scorpius wondering why. He then turned to Celestia. "What about you?"
"Discord", began Celestia but then she stopped because Discord said, "I know". By the way, for those of you who don't get that, basically, Celestia and Discord like each other.
"Well", said Scorpius, "How about you Main 6? Anything?"
"Yes", the main 6 began in unison, "We want to thank Tom for coming here. He shouldn't have yet he did. Tom, we thank you."
Tom just glared up at them. In his heart, he wasn't sure what to believe. He was only doing this for he wasn't really sure anymore. He thought he wanted to save them, but in his heart, he began to get hateful and bitter. Anyways, for now, he decided to fight.
"Okay", began Tom, "Let's do this!!".
Alright me brothas... and me sistas, so Tom and Celestia had made it. They found the Scorpius, and they were about to fight him. Celestia for the second time, and Tom, me brothas, was going to fight him for the first time. It was time to rock out me brothas and me sistas. Here we go...
"I will take back my kingdom! Do you understand me Scorpius?", screamed Celestia at the top of her lungs.
"Oh my, I am so frightened Celestia", began Scorpius, "But, if you are going to defeat me, Why didn't you just do that at the beginning? Maybe it is because, you will never defeat me! I don't know if you understand Celestia, but after I officially take Canterlot, I am going to conquer the rest of Equestria. Then, after I am through here, I will move on to the rest of Armonia! I will conquer this entire planet! No one will be able to stop the Scorpions! We are the master empire! Nothing, not even those dreaded Changelings will take us out! So Celestia, you were saying that you were going to do what now?"
At this, Celestia was so enraged that she charged Scorpius, but of course she let her anger get the best of her. It would be to her hurt. As soon as Celestia charged at Scorpius, Scorpius dodged her and let her hit her face hard against the throne room. Scorpius then went to paralyze Celestia, but Celestia was able to fly out of the way. She ran back to where Tom was... where Tom was... Well, Where Tom was doing whatever the equivalent to standing for a rock is. Anywho, Tom spoke.
"Maybe this time Princess we could take him at the same time?", said Tom.
"Yes... Maybe that would be better Tom", returned Celestia.
Now they both charged Scorpius at the same time. Scorpius, however, was very quick and he could make himself grow and shrink when he pleased. Scorpius used all of this to his advantage.
"Looks like you guys missed me", said Scorpius tauntingly as he was on the other side of the room. "Oh well, Guess you'll just have to be faster."
Tom and Celestia recuperated very quickly and recharged Scorpius. Tom hit Scorpius hard in the side while Celestia blasted Scorpius dead in the face. Then, Tom and Celestia did the same thing again and again. Scorpius was growing weaker every time, but there was one time when Celestia had to conserve her magic. Celestia was growing tired. Scorpius knew what he had to do.
Tom went to charge Scorpius again, but Scorpius was fast enough to jump over Tom. Tom crashed into a wall. Scorpius ran right over to Celestia.
"Now you go back to sleep princess!", yelled Scorpius. He then went to strike Celestia with his tail. He missed once, twice, and then three times as Celestia, who still had just enough energy left to hold off, kept dodging him. However, there is only so much energy within a pony, and Celestia was running out.
Scorpius could see that Celestia was getting more and more tired by the minute. He realized her vision was growing more and more clouded.
Scorpius began to taunt Celestia. "Oh my is the poor little princess getting tired?", began Scorpius, "Why doesn't she just take a nap?". Then, Scorpius hit Celestia on her left side. He used his claw so Celestia wasn't paralyzed, but the claw took the energy out of her. Scorpius jumped over to where Celestia lay. He pulled his tail high up in the air, and was just about to bring it crashing down into Celestia when Tom slammed right into Scorpius' bottom dollar. Scorpius went flying into a wall, and crashed into the wall with a thud, practically breaking the wall apart.
Tom rolled over to help Celestia. He pulled her on to his back, and rolled her over to a safer location. He put her closer to where the main 6 and Discord were being held. He then turned around and faced Scorpius. This enemy he would now have to face alone. It was Tom versus Scorpius. It was all on Tom's rubies now. It was up to him.
"Looks like its just you and me", began Scorpius laughing menacingly, "Well, at least this is going to be a much better fight. Are you ready, Rock?"
"Well", began Tom, "I guess lets get ready to RUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMBLEEEE!!". They went at it.
Tom slammed himself into Scorpius while Scorpius crashed his humongous pincers into Tom. Tom threw himself on top of Scorpius' back, and rolled the arachnid like he was one of Apple Jack's things that she rides upon screaming yee-haw. Scorpius did not take kindly to this, and so jumped high up in the air crashing into a ceiling. Tom hit that ceiling hard, and came crashing down. Tom started to crack a tiny bit.
"It looks like....huh.... you lost something there Tom", said Scorpius running out of breath, "Perhaps you should give up now, why lose anything else?".
"It looks like I lost something", retaliated Tom, "I think you mean you lost something!". At this, Tom jumped up high, and landed very very swift and hard on Scorpius' left pincer. Scorpius' left pincer was crushed and was not able to be moved for a while. Scorpius yelled and screamed in agony and rage.
"You're going to regret that TOM!!", yelled Scorpius, "And I mean regret that!!"
It was true because Scorpius came sprinting over to Tom, and flung his tail at Tom's chest. Tom wasn't affected by the paralysis, but more by the quickness and heaviness of Scorpius' tail. Tom cracked a lot more this time. Then Scorpius grabbed Tom, and threw him against the wall. Scorpius charged over to Tom again and picked him up and threw him against the wall. Scorpius did this again and again and again. He was full of rage. Scorpius was so full of rage that he went into his most powerful form; His Dark Form.
"Tom... I hate you! I HATE YOU!!!!!", Scorpius was full of anger and hate. He was throwing Tom against the wall so hard that Tom's whole left leg fell off and shattered into a thousand tiny pieces. Tom couldn't take it anymore.
"STOP!!! STOP!!!", yelled Tom, "STOP!!!"
"You want me to stop. YOU WANT ME TO STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!" screeched Scorpius, "I will give you STOP!!!". At this, Scorpius took Tom and threw him through the window. Tom fell over a thousand feet before crashing into the ground. Tom was shattered. He was broken. Everything was broken, but worst of all is that Tom's heart was broken. He was nothing anymore. He was nothing. Tom started to believe the lies. He told himself that he was nothing. Tom told himself that he was a loser, that he couldn't think for himself, and what was the point of risking his life for those others. They didn't even cheer Tom on. What did he care!? What did Tom care anymore?! Tom wanted to let them die. Tom realized that they should. I mean what did they ever do for Tom... NOTHING!!!!!!! Tom lay there shattered in a million tiny pieces. He fell into a deserted alleyway. Tom didn't see life anymore, and he didn't care. He was almost partially glad that Scorpius had hurt him so bad, it opened Tom's heart to what was important... Himself. Tom was becoming bitter and full of hate.
Oh Tom me brotha oh Tom. It is too bad that Tom became this way. Not only that, but Scorpius was so angry he was going to kill Celestia, Discord, and the main 6. What did Tom care for it though? What did they ever do for him? Poor Tom thinking only for himself... I only hope and pray Tom that someone/pony/thing/or whatever would open your eyes. IS THERE ANY HOPE OUT THERE!!!???!!!???!!!???!!!???
Don't fret me brotha Tom, Don't fret. Everything will be allright. Hold on me brotha, hold on.
It was useless. Nothing could convince Tom to go back in. It was useless. Tom didn't care anymore. He just wanted to die. In a way, Tom had died. Tom had lost all the life inside of him, and had replaced it with hate, deceit, and all other evil devices. Tom had gone so far back that he didn't even care anymore whether the main 6, Celestia, and Discord were put to death. They were about to be. Tom could only see all of the suffering that he had gone through. Not only that, but Tom had given up hope. Tom fell into all types of sins because of this one act. It brought Tom low to his knees. Tom only lay there moaning and groaning. It's a shame Tom that you went through all you went through, and yet you lay here on the cold, hard floor groaning and moaning to yourself.
"Shut up Narrator!", yelled Tom, "Life isn't worth it, and those ponies in there, they deserve every last thing that they are going to get!", Tom was furious.
Do they Tom? Do they really? You know everyone deserves death and punishment, yet Jesus Christ died for them to redeem them. Tom I am sure that you did something wrong in your life, have you not? Yet, you still have a bed to sleep in, and quarters to live in. What are you so upset about? Why don't you do something? I mean none of the other taunts and evils that came upon you in the forest or even at home bothered you, yet now you fall because of one fight? Tom, you should be much stronger than this! You should rise up, and march right back in there and defeat Scorpius!
"Its not that simple! I mean why should I waste any more of my life to fight for those losers!" said Tom, "WHY?!".
Well, Tom, well why not? I mean why don't you storm right back in there, and heap coals of fire upon everybody's heads. I mean they will probably realize that even though they did all this evil stuff to you, that you still forgave them. Tom, I think that you should march right back in there, if not for their's or even your sake, at least for Sweetie Belle's and for Apple Bloom's. I mean they are nice to you now. I think you should do it at least for them.
"Forget it! Why should I? I mean they never liked me to begin with! No one did! No one ever has! Not even my own parents loved me!".
Tom, I know, I can see that you went through alot, but that is what makes you so durable and what makes you, you. You have pushed through your injuries like they were nothing. You have fought through every thing that has come at you as if it were the next blow of wind, so why not now?
"Because I realize now, narrator, that I should only care for myself! I I I that is what it should be! Only I!!!!!!", said Tom.
Oh Tom, is there anyone who can save your mind? Anyone who can change you? Anyone? Anypony? SOMETHING??!!??!!?? It seems that there would soon be...
Tom lay there bemoaning himself crying over his whatever he was crying over when a lone can rolled over to where Tom was. Tom glanced up at it for just a second before it burst into a bluish- darkish color. Out of this can sprang Luna, Princess Luna that is. Also, Shining Armor and Princess Cadance came out of it. Tom just glanced up at them, and said, "What do you losers want?"
"What!!", yelled Shining Armor, "How dare you speak to royalt--"
"Hold on 'hon", interrupted Cadance, "Hold on! You don't know what this rock has been through."
"Tom the Rock", requested Princess Luna very calmly and quietly, "Why are laying here? What has happened?"
"NOTHING!!!", shouted Tom, "NOTHING!!!! Why do you incessant ponies question me as to everything? What do you want for me, but to harm me and to crush me, and to do all other manner of evil to me! I despise you! I even despise my own kind! From now on, I am going to look out for me!! and ME ALONE!!!!!!!!" Tom was enraged beyond belief. Perhaps something did get him when Scorpius stung him, perhaps Scorpius hit Tom with Hate.
"Tom", asked Cadance softly, "What has happened to you? You aren't the rock that I talked to many years ago as a little filly? Why have you changed?"
Tom was taken aback, but he remembered. He remembered the days when he talked with Cadance, and how Cadance would talk back to him. Tom remembered the days when the only one who truly cared for him was Cadance. Not even his own kind cared for him, but oh Cadance, she loved Tom and Tom loved her. They did everything together. Tom shed a tear, but not tears of hate and sorrow, this time Tom shed a tear of... a tear of joy. However, Tom still held on to his bitterness. It was glued to him like a barnacle.
"Cadance... Cadance, it is you. I-- I didn't know that you got married. That is so nice. Why didn't-- Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because Tom", began Cadance, "Because I didn't know what happened to you, Tom. I didn't know. After I had to go away to prepare to become a Princess, I was never allowed to see you again, but oh how I missed you."
"Oh yeah", began Tom his heart becoming black again, "I remember... You were my only friend... MY ONLY FRIEND!!!! Then, your kind, always your kind, took you away! Cadance, you are the only pony that I will ever respect...EVER!!"
"Why are we even here again?", questioned Shining Armor, "Shouldn't we be saving the princesses and my sister and so forth right about now?"
"Shining dear", began Cadance, "We are going to need all of the help that we can get. Tom over here is the strongest rock I know. We need him. Why don't you come with us Tom?"
"CADANCE!!!", yelled Tom, and Shining Armor stepped in front of Cadance to protect her, "Don't you turn on me! DON"T YOU TRY TO USE ME!!!!"
"Tom... Tom I would never do that", began Cadance, "I would ne--"
"Cadance", began Tom, Just stop before something gets out of hand. Now!"
"I-- I'm sorry Tom", began Cadance again, "I'm sorry". At this Cadance and Shining Armor turned away motioning for Luna to come with them. Luna told them that she would be right there, and turned to Tom.
"Tom", began Princess Luna, "I just want you to know that I was once in your shoes. I too hated the whole world, and especially my sister, but I learned to forgive, because I learned that Hate and forgiveness only consume a pony. Tom, I hope that you could learnt that too". Luna waited a moment for Tom to respond, but Tom never did. Luna turned back toward the others, and looked at Tom one more time. She opened her mouth, but decided against it. Luna, Cadance, and Shining Armor went to the castle to try and save their friends and relatives. Tom lay there. He was beginning to crack, but he would need just one more boost. It came.
"Tom...Tom...TOM!! Where are you?", questioned a mysterious rock figure coming closer and closer to Tom.
"I'm over here! What the heck do you want?!!??!!?!", questioned Tom.
As Tom looked over to the mysterious figure, he could recognize that it was his grandfather and the Random Human Hermit. Tom eyeballed them, and then asked them what they wanted.
"What do you guys want?", asked Tom.
"Well", began Tom's grandfather, "We want to know what you are doing here, not fighting the enemy not trying to save everypony?"
"Don't get on my case too grandpa!", yelled Tom, "Don't you dare get on my case!".
"Tom... I want to tell you something that I never told anyone. Tom, you know there was a time when I knew Celestia's parents. That is right. Tom, I have never shared this with anyone/rock/ or just plain anything. Tom I never even told your grandmother, but along time ago, there was an evil crocodile king who came to Equestria. He conquered everything in his path. I could have stopped him Tom, but I was furious with pony kind because one pony betrayed me. I hated this pony so I decided that I pony kind was evil. Tom, I became full of hate and anger and I let Celestia's parents die. I let them die. Tom, Celestia and Luna were able to defeat the villain, but they were not able to have parents. Tom, I felt horrible about it for the rest of my days, and I still do now Tom. It is something I live with. It is also all because I never forgave. Tom, if I would have helped then we could have destroyed that villain, and who knows maybe rock kind would become very prestigious, but Tom I hated and let hate control me, and because of this, I suffered and so did so many others. Tom you must never let hate fill you because if you do it will only destroy you. It will make you so angry that lava will spew forth from your gems, and eventually it will melt you. Tom, I don't want you to go through what I went through. Tom... please forgive...PLEASE!!!!" Tom's grandfather finished. Tom eyeballed him and watched as his grandfather was breaking down in tears.
"What-- What are you doing here?", Tom asked the Random Human Hermit.
"Well", began Random Human Hermit, "I am here to show you this, and to revive you". Then Random Human Hermit pulled that box from his satchel that he had. He turned it on, and Tom watched as Luna, Shining Armor, and Cadance were all being mercilessly beaten be Scorpius. Tom also heard Scorpius maniacally shouting that he was going to kill everyone nationally, and that because of this moment, Equestria would fall even sooner than he anticipated. Tom began to feel sorry especially for Cadance. After Random Human Hermit showed enough, he turned to Tom. "Okay Tom", he began, "Time to be revived". At this, Random Human Hermit threw something at Tom. Tom's rock hard body then began to start becoming the super powerful strong body that Tom once had. Tom felt more alive than ever, but he still had a drop of hate in him.
"Thanks for the revive, but this doesn't mean that I am going to save them. I still hate--"
"Tom", began Tom's grandfather, "You may do what you want, but please realize that hate will only destroy you. You use to love and hearken unto my stories, and believe me, I will not lie to you. I never have. It is your choice Tom, but remember that whatever you do, I still love you. I have to go back now with Random Human Hermit, but I beg and plead of you, don't let hate glue itself to your heart, please don't. Goodbye Tom, and I trust that you will make the right choice."
After this, Random Human Hermit and Tom's grandfather, who were good friends, left. Tom sat there and thought for a while. Then he made a decision.
________________________________________________________________________
Luna was thrown hard into the ground. She was beaten back, and she was hurting and in pain. She looked over and saw Shining Armor trying to hold back Scorpius' paralyzing tail, as Shining Armor tried to protect his wife, Cadance. It was to no avail. Scorpius grabbed Shining Armor, and let him fly into a wall. He then picked up Cadance, and with an evil tone said, "Oh my what a pretty mare you have here". Then Scorpius struck Cadance with his paralysis tail. Shining Armor screamed No, and charged Scorpius. It was just what Scorpius wanted. Scorpius struck Shining Armor with his tail, and Shining went down. Luna was too injured to get up, so Scorpius took it as the time to chain both Shining and Cadance together and then put them into their orb prisons. He then turned to Luna. She was now able to stand.
"You--You... (Luna half-collapsed but was able to pick herself up) You-- You won't be stopping us. We... We will defeat you", said Luna. She glanced over at her friends and family, and she cried a tear knowing that she wouldn't be able to stop Scorpius. Her friends and family yelled out to her, but were withheld as the orbs shocked them back.
"Oh Luna... Poor, poor Luna", began Scorpius, "Maybe if you stop now, then maybe... just maybe, I will aloow you to live. Only you though."
"I would never surrender to an insect like you", screeched Luna.
"So be it then", laughed Scorpius.
Luna used this as the time to blow Scorpius back into a wall, but then she collasped as her magic and energy were running out. Scorpius was angry and skulked over to her. She picked her up in his claws, and then started to squeeze. Luna begged for mercy, and her friends and family pleaded with Scorpius not to kill her. Scorpius just laughed and then spoke, " Ha ha ha you don't recall that I am going to kill all of you, so why not start here?". Then Scorpius thought t would be more fun to throw Luna against things so he chucked her into a nearby wall. Luna gasped and started to breathe heavily as Scorpius skulked over to her. Luna realized that her end was nigh. She looked at her friends and family one last time. She looked at her victor and persecutor. Then, finally, she looked to the door. Her eyes, she thought, were playing tricks on her. There stood Tom.
"Hey Scorpius!", yelled Tom (also imagine right now that Tom's got on some hot sunglasses and that some crzy music like eye of the tiger or something is playing), "Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?". Tom finished tauntingly.
Scorpius turned around. He was enraged and partly frightened. "What", began Scorpius, "How-- How are you still alive?!"
"Oh my", returned Tom, "Am I tasting a hint of scaredy-cat (no offense to all you cat readers out there)".
"I am going to kill you Tom", began Scorpius, "After I finish this". Scorpius turned around to pick up Luna and crush her with his pincers, but Tom interrupted.
"Now hang on", began Tom, "How about we do this the right way. You put Luna in the orb prison like everypony else, and then you and me fight. If I win, well, I obviously free everybody, but if you win, then you do what you want. Sound good to you?"
"Fine!" exclaimed Scorpius. He then picked up Luna and chained her up, and then put her in the prison orb.
"Also", interrupted Tom, "Lets let the ponies speak, and here you can even get some of your best soldiers to cheer you on. We'll make this a full blown wrestling match only this time to the death or at least near it. What do you say?"
"I like it", said Scorpius. Then he lowered the shockers and allowed the captured to speak. Scorpius also brought in some of his soldiers. The scorpion soldiers obviously cheered for Scorpius while the main 6 and the rest of the ponies (and yes Discord) chanted for Tom. The match was set. Tom eyeballed Scorpius and Scorpius eyeballed Tom. This was going to be the finisher. Whoever won this, won the whole thing. Lets see who's going to win, and LETS GET READY TO RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMBBBBBLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tom looked hard into Scorpius' eyes. It was like crazy man. Like stinking fire was starting right in the middle of the floor. Flamethrowers, man, flamethrowers. Then, it was all like more staring straight ahead. Right into each other's eyes. Finally, Tom charged.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH", screamed Tom as he charged head first into Scorpius' side. Scorpius was able to dodge, and threw Tom up into the ceiling. Tom came crashing down, and fell straight onto the floor again. He then heard a crack, but Tom wasn't giving up. He got up and rolled into Scorpius' side, and slammed him hard once, twice, and then thrice. Scorpius hit the wall over twelve times before he was able to dodge Tom. He finally did. Scorpius took his turn, and then grabbed one of his soldier's cannons. He fired it at Tom, but Tom was able to dodge. He rolled at the cannon, but Scorpius had finally locked on. BABOOSH! The charge blasted Tom back into the wall again. Scorpius charged it up again, and just as Tom was getting up, Scorpius fired the charge again. He blasted Tom right back into the wall. He did it again, but Tom was able to dodge this time. He then charged Scorpius again, and was able to knock the cannon away just as it fired. The charge blew right into the ceiling wall, and caused the whole ceiling to collapse. The ceiling collapsed right on top of Scorpius. Tom just dodged it.
The rubble was on top of Scorpius for a while, and nothing came out. Tom was worried, but everypony else cheered. Tom didn't like it, not one bit. Everypony else started to tell Tom to free them, and just as Tom was about to, Scorpius exploded out of the rubble. Tom couldn't turn quick enough. Scorpius grabbed Tom and threw him against the wall. Scorpius did it again. Then, Scorpius grabbed Tom and chucked him right into a window nearby. Tom crashed through the window, and fell all the way down against the ground. He lay there for a few minute. Then, he slowly got up. He started to head right back into the castle. He knew that he had already lost time, and that his friends would soon be destroyed. However, as he got to the castle entrance, twelve Scorpion guards greeted him there. It wasn't good. Tom knew he had to fight them, but he also knew that if he did, then his friends would die. Tom saw no other choice. He began to roll at them, when, out of the corner of his eye, three soldier ponies attacked the soldiers. Then, he saw millions of ponies charging the scorpion soldiers. Tom realized that the ponies were rebelling. They were rebelling against the Scorpion rule. Tom was interrupted when a pony soldier shouted to him.
"Hey", began the pony soldier, "We got your back".
"Thanks", returned Tom. Tom headed back into the belly of the beast.
Tom saw it all around him. The ponies were fighting hoof to pincer. They were also fighting ranged. It was interesting. It was great because it meant that Tom could rescue his friends. Tom charged all the way to the throne room again. He kicked in the doors, and saw Scorpius standing there. He had Luna still in his claws. He was just about to kill her. Tom didn't let that happened. Tom slammed himself right into Scorpius' side. Scorpius crashed back and dropped Luna. Tom caught her, and lay her nicely down away from the battle. Luna was still to weak to fight. Tom turned back to Scorpius, and told him straight.
"Did I not tell you that, 'I'll be Bach'". Tom was taunting Scorpius solidly. Scorpius just yelled. He was angry that Tom would not die. Tom rolled himself straight into Scorpius again. He crashed into Scorpius and nailed him through. Then, as Scorpius went to strike Tom, Tom jumped over Scorpius' pincer, and came crashing down on it. It was crushed. Scorpius screamed in agony. Then, Scorpius went enraged again. Scorpius was in his most dangerous form. Tom had to give him everything he had. Tom did.
Tom blew back Scorpius. Scorpius looked up, but as he did, Tom began to randomly float in the air. Then, there were random lights and then Tom began to transform. When everypony looked back to see what Tom was, they found out. Tom's final form is Alicorn form. Now, I will interrupt and say that Tom only becomes an Alicorn in the most needed places. You see, just as Scorpius has his ENRAGED form which only happens when he gets his angriest, so does Tom have his Alicorn form which only happens when Tom needs it the most. Basically, I could have just summed it up by saying that this was going to be an awesome battle. It was the most powerful verses the most powerful. Here it comes.
Tom was an alicorn and Scorpius was an enraged arachnid. The battle goes on. Scorpius charged Tom, but Tom flew right over Scorpius. Then Scorpius fired a huge beam at Scorpius from his new unicorn horn. Tom blew back Scorpius, but not before Scorpius fired a beam from is tail knocking Tom back himself. However, Tom was able to recover. Tom rolled at Scorpius, but then quickly jumped up flying. Then Tom fired another beam at Scorpius. Scorpius' face crashed down into the floor. Scorpius, however, had some tricks up his sleeve. As Tom came by for another go, Scorpius grabbed Tom's right wing with his tail. Tom went down and crashed into the ground. Then Scorpius jumped on top of Tom and slammed his face into the ground a few times. Scorpius then took both of Tom's wings, and ripped them off of Tom. Tom writhed in agony, but he also took vengeance. Tom threw Scorpius back up in the air, and the Tom rolled out of the way. Then Tom crashed on Scorpius' pincers (they grow back for enraged mode). Tom crushed them both. Scorpius writhed in agony. However, Scorpius fired his bolt from his tail, and threw Tom into the throne chair. Tom recovered and blew two of Scorpius' legs off with his horn. Scorpius was now very injured, but he wasn't destroyed. However, Scorpius knew that he was losing, so, like all villains do, Scorpius cheated.
Scorpius fired another heavy bolt at Tom. Tom was hit square in the face. Scorpius took this as his chance. He rushed over to where Rarity was being held. He opened the orb prison, and then wrapped Rarity in his tail. He yelled to Tom, just as Tom was recuperating.
"Hey Tom", began Scorpius, "Look at this."
Tom looked over and saw that Rarity was in Scorpius' clutches. Tom spoke back, "Don't-- Don't do it Scorpius! She has nothing against you!"
"You're right", began Scorpius, "She has nothing against me, but what about you, Tom? What has Rarity done to you? You know Tom, I know all about what this vermin (Scorpius began to squeeze the life out of Rarity) has done to you. I know Tom. I know. I just have to ask Tom, Why? Why do you fight for some pony who has done you so wrong? Why?"
Tom thought about that for a moment, and then he opened his mouth. "You want to know why, Scorpius? I fight for these ponies and all those who have done me wrong because there are also those who have done me right. I also fight for them to show them something that even though they have done me much wrong, they have also been forgiven. Scorpius I fight for them to make them think. I fight for them to make them realize that even though they have done wrong to me, I can forgive them. I do forgive them. Scorpius, that is why I fight for them. That is why. I forgive them. Forgiveness is a gift, you know? It is not something that can be bought."
Tom looked up and found that Scorpius was crying. He was actually crying. Rarity was on the ground. She was only unconscious. She was knocked out because Scorpius was filled with so much anger that he squeezed her till she became unconscious, then he realized and dropped her. He was crying because of things done in his past, because of hurts he suffered. Tom helped him to realize that he can forgive. Tom helped Scorpius, and every pony to realize that they can forgive. Tom was a hero. Tom was a full-blown hero. Tom rolled over to Scorpius, and hugged him. It was all hugs and forgiveness. It was great. Eventually, Tom and Scorpius made up. Here is the rest of what happens.
Scorpius eventually freed every pony. He took all of his troops and left for his country. Equestria and Scorpia are now allies. Everyone forgave each other, and Tom went back to live with Rarity. Eventually, Tom and Rarity got married. Tom never did become an alicorn (Ha ha tricked you), but Tom did become a successful business man. You see, if you remember way way back in like the fifth chapter, Tom met that hermit guy. Well, if you remember all of that stuff that he had. EEEYUP, that is right, Tom and that guy went into business together. They sold things called televisions. They sold Xbox 360's, Wii-U's, and PS3's. They began a long line of toys and so forth, and they even began a show. They called it My Little Human. It was suppose to be a little filly's show, but it has aquired a ton of older colt followers too (as well as some older mare followers). Anyways, so Tom's Destiny was in fact too become a big business rock. He was a tycoon, in fact. Anyways, that is all. Discord and Celestia got married, and Tom became the royal defender also. Anytime there is an evil villain that can not be stopped, well, Tom is on the way. That is it for now, but I bet you are all wondering who stole that piece of chocolate cake, well, find out in the next chapter.
Tom the Rock had a hard life. Ever since he was a little rock, he was always crushed and grounded away. When he was just 18 years old, people broke his arm off. They chipped at his arm until it was off because they wanted minerals. Minerals! Can you believe that? How inconsiderate they were. I mean would you want someone to take off your arm because they wanted something you owned. They could have just asked, but NO! They had to tear off Tom's arm. That wasn't the end of it though. When Tom turned 303 years old, someone pushed him off of a cliff because they needed to build themselves a house. A House!! I mean seriously these ponies were so insensitive. Rocks had feelings too you know. Not just that though, people would always say that Tom was stoned, and Tom didn't even do drugs. Everyone mistreated Tom. Tom lived a stony existence, always down and never up. It was horrible, but then Tom was found by Rarity. At first, He thought this would be the day when someone would care for them. It was only partly.
When Tom decided to move in with Rarity, Rarity agreed but only after Tom bothered her for two weeks. It broke Tom's emerald. I mean Rarity said that Tom was her favorite, but then she just threw him off like he was the next fall. Not just that, though, Rarity went and made her 15 year old sister the boss of Tom when Rarity left to go and save the day. I mean really!! Tom was 3,547 years old compared to Sweetie Belle's 15 years old. It just wasn't right. Everyone put down Tom too. For example, Twilight would come visit Rarity, and would look at Tom and say, "Wow you still have that dumb, old rock, Rarity?". That wasn't right. Tom was one of the smartest rocks in all of Equestria. He, in fact, invented the Idiot Formula which allowed any pony to find out whether their friends were idiots or not. Tom also knew practically every formula known to pony kind, and he knew the science of how Equestria changed seasons. Tom wasn't dumb!! No pony listened to him though, they all just called him a dumb, old rock.
Even ponies who should have felt Tom's pain made fun of him. Like, there was this one time when Tom was taking a roll down Luna Avenue, and Derpy stopped him and called him a big, fat baby. A BABY!!!!! Tom became an adult over 2,900 years ago. Not only that, Tom worked out. He wasn't fat, but no pony believed him. They just called him fat. It hurt Tom. He even shed a tear once. Tom, though, had a destiny. He knew in his heart that he would discover it. He told himself this every day, and one day he would discover his destiny. He would, and he knew it. It all started on the third of Celestius in the year 4500 A.S. This is Tom the Rock's destiny.
"TOMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!", yelled Rarity.
Tom knew Rarity was angry, so he quickly rushed down the stairs. "Yes, Ms. Rarity", asked Tom meekly, but with his very deep voice.
"Tom, did I not specifically ask you to take out the trash? Why has it not been taken out?", questioned Rarity again.
"Well, Ms. Rarity, I-- I just only have one arm so I can't--"
"Tom!! What did I tell you about making up excuses? I told you that there would be NONE!! So get over here, and TAKE OUT THIS TRASH!!!!!!".
"Yes, yes sorry Ms. Rarity". Tom went over and grabbed the trash as best as he could. He struggled getting it because his arm really bothered him. He used his last arm so many times that it was bigger than Arnold Scharzenpony. Tom was proud of it, but using it so much wore it out. Anyways, Tom thought it was unfair, while he was doing all the chores, Sweetie Belle would go out and play with all her friends. It just wasn't right. Tom knew that he shouldn't complain, though, at least he had a roof over his house...sometimes. Once, when Tom did all these chores for Rarity, Rarity told him that he had to go sleep outside. Not only was it winter during that time, but it was also raining out during that day. Tom was freezing when he came inside the next day, and he immediately had to go to his chores. Then, when anything bad happened, it was always blamed on Tom. In fact, just yesterday, someone stole a piece of cake from Twilight's fridge, and every pony in Equestria blamed it on Tom. Tom was also always getting interrupted, like right now.
"TOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!... You forgot to take out this pizza" Rarity interrupted Tom.
"Pizza?", thought Tom, "When did we order that?". Tom decided to ask. "When did we get pizza, Rarity?"
"We ate it while you were taking forever outside!", yelled Rarity.
"What?!!?", thought Tom, "You ordered Pizza without me!". This just wasn't right. They order pizza, and don't even share any with Tom. Tom hated this type of treatment, but its what he got everyday for his life. Its a good thing rocks were so forgiving because if they weren't, well, then Rocks would have ruled all of Equestria, if not all of Armonia. Rocks, though, weren't that aggresive.
Anyways, Tom went back inside and fetched the pizza box. He threw it out, and went to go to sleep. He comforted himself with a little bit of comedy which was called, the Three Pony Fools. It was a comedy on Equestrian television. It had these three ponies who acted like dumb ponies. One was called Tangly, the other Joe, and the final one was called Jerry. it was a humorous show. Tom loved it. He loved all things comedy. In fact, when Tom got enough money to leave he planned on becoming a stand up comedian. He had perfect jokes. His favorite joke was, "So why did the pony cross the road?", and the answer Tom would reply with was, "Ponies don't cross the roads...Ponies don't even have roads!". Tom loved this joke, but personally, in my opinion, it wasn't that funny. Anyways, Tom loved the show the Three Pony Fools. This show was, in fact, funny.
The next morning Tom was up early making breakfast for every pony. Tom also loved to cook. He thought about this being his second occupation, and every pony loved his cooking, all except for Spike anyways, but who needed Spike? Not Tom (and not Chuck Testa either). When every pony came down for breakfast, they all thanked Tom for his breakfast, to which Tom replied a big, "Your Welcome". After Breakfast, Twilight stormed into the Carousel boutique.
"Rarity! Rarity! Come quick! Princess Celestia needs our help!", Twilight had a tone of urgency within her voice.
"What? What is it darling? What does the princess need now?" Rarity asked.
"I don't know, but she needs us now. A few stallions will be over to get us in three hours! Pack now!!", Twilight then ran out probably trying to go and get the other ponies. Personally, in Tom's opinion, he thought he should have been princess. He thought he would have done a much better job at it, but he would have never been elected. Anyways, Rarity turned to Tom.
"Tommmmmmmmm!! Quickly, go and pack my things!! I need to be leaving soon, and your still standing here!!", Rarity was furious at how long Tom was taking.
"Yes, sorry Ms. Rarity, I will get right on that". Tom went upstairs, and into Rarity's room to begin packing Rarity's things. When he was done, he came down, and told Rarity he was finished. Rarity rushed over and grabbed her things before telling Tom and Sweetie Belle who would be in charge.
"Okay, Tom, Sweetie Belle, listen up, Sweetie Belle, you are in charge. Make sure Tom doesn't do anything bad, and Tom you make sure that you don't do anything bad or else!! Sweetie Belle will report everything that happened while I was gone... Okay, Goodbye you too, and enjoy your lives, I have to go and save the world again". Rarity rushed out the door, and Sweetie Belle turned to Tom.
"Okay Tom... Time to go and get the Cutie Mark Crusaders... We're going to be getting our Cutie marks in... Geology!!" Sweetie Belle finished.
"OHHHHH NOOOOOO!!!!", screamed Tom's thoughts, "This is going to be a very, very, very LOOOOOOOOONG day."
Tom entered the forest. He traveled a few miles without encountering anything. It was surprising, but it was what happened. When he got about halfway through the forest, he encountered a random shack in the middle of the woods. This was not good. Not good at all. Tom had remembered his brother's uncle's sister's cousin second removed's dog barking to Tom that if you ever encountered a random shack in the middle of the woods, that you should never, ever go into it. Tom knew this wasn't good, but Tom wasn't scared. Tom was a rock. Eventually, he decided to go over and knock on the door of the shack. He slowly rolled over to the shack, and had trouble getting up the hill (we should all know by now that you shouldn't throw a grenade up a hill because it might roll back down and blow you up). Finally, though, Tom made it up. It was a slow push, but he made it. Tom went over and rolled to the door. He knocked with whatever hands or whatever he would use to knock with. Remember, this is a story and stories defy physics half the time. He knocked once, and there was no answer. He knocked twice and there was no answer. He knocked a third time, and this time there was an answer, but Tom knocked so fast that he couldn't stop himself when the guy answered, and so Tom punched him in the face.
"Ow what the crap, rock? What did you do that for?", asked the Random Human Hermit.
"Sorry! Sorry!" replied Tom, "That was an accident".
"An accident my butt! So what the heck are you here for anyways? Don't you know that I haven't been visited by anyone in like thirty years, except that blue horse called Lyra who visits me everyday. Man that horse is annoying. She always wants to find out about humans, but frankly, I don't care what she wants. I am trying to live out my day instead of being bothered by her. Anyways, what do you want rock?"
I hate to interrupt, but I just wanted to point out that I find it really weird how no pony/human/or whatever you are finds it a little bit weird that they are talking to a rock. Anyway, here is what Tom responded with.
"Sorry sir", said Tom, "I just wanted to know if you could point me in the direction to Canterlot. I am on this quest, and I forget where Canterlot is."
"Well, don't you have a map or something?", asked the random human hermit.
"Well, sir, about that. You see there is the cat at this house that I reside in, and well she tore it up. The cat is spoiled, but no pony ever seems to care about it."
"Oh, I know that feeling brother. Here come on in, and I will see what I can do."
"Thanks guy. Hey what's your name?"
"Oh just call me Random Human Hermit".
"Interesting name".
"Ya it is. Come on in."
Tom entered the shack with Random Human Hermit. He found inside all manners of things. It was weirder than Zecora's place. For example, there was this black box when, once turned on, would play this game where you could shoot people and crap. The hermit also had this other item which he called a television. It played all types of shows. One of the shows on was called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Tom thought it resembled their land. He found it very interesting. There was a ton of other things too. The hermit had tons of books from Bibles to comics. He even had this thing called a microwave. It was supposed to heat up food that was cooled. Tom saw a future in this little device. He decided that maybe eventually him and this hermit guy could go into business together and become bitlionares. He saw a future. Tom decided though that perhaps he should do this later on when he was done with his quest. Finally, Tom and the hermit sat down.
"Okay", said the hermit, "I need you to be quiet while I look for a map. Actually, if you want just go over there and enjoy the television. Also, if you hear a knock, see a blue horse, or anything of that matter, lay down, be quiet, and don't do anything!! I am very serious. That little blue horse gets on my nerves way too much. Do you understand Tom?", the hermit finished.
"Yes sir Random Human Hermit sir!!", Tom replied loudly. Then Tom went over to watch this show that was on. It had all manner of things which were in his world. Tom even saw himself and Discord, but Tom had never known of this show, let alone a television. In fact, Tom hadn't seen half the crap in Equestria that he saw here. Tom had to ask, but first he picked up the device called the remote, and changed the channel. On came a channel called the Animal Planet. Tom sat back and listened.
"The Gazelle", came the voice from inside the television, "Is a very interesting creature. It feeds off of grass and other herbs. it is known as an herbivore. In fact, the gazelle has never been seen to even eat other meat, however, there are things that feed on the gazelle. Watch closely as this cheetah rushes the gazelle and tears it limb from limb eating its entrails and body parts. May we remind you also that this show is, in fact, kid-friendly". The television continued to speak. Tom listened. Finally, the hermit guy came back.
"Hey Tom, I got this map for you here. I think it goes to Canterlot, but I still think half of it is missing. Anyways, I wanted to share something with you." said the hermit.
"Go ahead Random Human Hermit, I am listening.", replied Tom.
"Okay, well listen", began the human hermit, "I have to say this. Since this is one of those adventure stories, I have to like tell you all about like what you are going to face and crap along your journey. I also have to like give you all this advice, and tell you that it will like teach you how to become a better rock and all that jazz, so umm, here is all I know. Truthfully, I didn't know you were going to come here, so I kind of have to improvise. Here it is then. (Before you begin reading, imagine that Random Human Hermit gets all into like dramatic voice bro's, okay here it is). Tom on your journey you will face three separate entities. They are pure evil. They will try to turn you away from your journey by any means possible. You must not listen to them, but you will defeat them in very specific ways. The first enemy that comes will test your resolve. You must use your mind to defeat this evil entity. The second entity will come not to long after. You must also defeat this one with your mind. The final entity will come right before you get to the forest's edge. You must defeat this one with your mind. After this you will have learned something, and with all these virtues, you will be able to defeat the main bad guy over in Canterlot. You will free your friend's, save Equestria, and find out your destiny!!!!! Okay, so there you go Tom that is how you will do it."
"Now wait a minute, Random Human Hermit!! All the ways you said I would defeat the three evil's were all the same, with my mind. Isn't it suppose to be like one with compassion, one with love, one with whatever?"
"Tom I already told you. I didn't even know you were coming. The narrator just dropped the ball, and it landed on me. You will defeat all these guys with your mind because you will use your brain. I don't know how you are going to defeat them. You will find out when you get there."
"So wait just a second, Random Human Hermit, you mean to tell me that you don't even know? Do you even know if there are going to be three entities?"
"No not really Tom".
"Well then... Okay well thanks for the map Random Human Hermit, you have a nice rest of the day".
"Yup you too Tom, and as long as Lyra doesn't come, then I will"
"Okay Random Human Hermit, well I will see you!! Bye!"
As Tom went out the door, Lyra went by him, and flew into Random Human Hermit's arms. Random Human Hermit was so angry. He started yelling at Lyra to get out of his house. Tom felt bad, but had his own things to worry about. He continued on his journey, and soon he would find the first beast to fight. It would prepare him, but its all in the next chapter so you will have to wait. Until then, enjoy this picture of a picture.
"Wait a second narrator!", interrupted the boss man, "we are low on money and have just done some budget cuts so we can't put up a picture!" finished the Boss man.
Okay then. Well, sorry, but there will be no picture of a picture. Sorry, but have a nice day otherwise. Bye until next time. Mwhahahahahahahahahahaha.
Who did steal the Chocolate Cake?
Now, I am sure that you are all wondering who stole the chocolate cake? Well, lets find out. It took much searching, but eventually every pony found out that it wasn't Tom. That's right it wasn't. You see, Tom told Twilight that he would never steal the chocolate cake. Actually, Tom was allergic to Chocolate. That's right, he couldn't have it. Not only that, but Chocolate was against Tom. Ya, you must understand that Chocolate and rocks have always had this bitterness toward each other. They actually had three major wars on it, and an untold number of smaller wars. Anyways, the real culprit of the cake eating was Spike. Eeeeyup, Spike the Dragon ate that cake. He gobbled it up. Here is how everybody found out.
Twilight had a special party for Tom. Every pony was invited. Actually, every body was invited. Tom was sitting there next to Spike when they were playing a game of monopony. It was an interesting game. However, Spike, who was drunk off of whatever ponies get drunk off of, accidentally mentioned how good this chocolate cake that he ate recently was. Now, nopony or anybody remembered giving Spike any cake recently, and so they asked him what he meant. He revealed to everypony ad everybody that Twilight's cake, her chocolate one, was the bomb diggety. He loved, and he mean LOVED!! it. Twilight stared at Spike for a long while. Actually, every body stared a t Spike for a long while. Spike really didn't care. He was drunk. Finally, Spike spoke.
"What? What do you guys want?", asked Spike.
"Spike", began Twilight (and you could tell she was getting angry), "You mean to tell me that you ate that chocolate cake?"
"Yes I did", said Spike, "Why is there a problem with that?"
Then everybody, including Tom who just could not forgive this one, yelled at Spike. They then began chasing Spike, and Spike just started running around not knowing at all what was going on. Then as every pony/body/dog/hamster/poofball/whatever you are was chasing Spike, music began playing. The scene started to get further and further away. The black wall began to close, and finally, I say goodbye. Thanks for reading Tom's destiny, and remember, Don't steal chocolate cake. To finish the lessons, Forgive just as Christ has or will forgive you if you let him, Know that you are special in God's eyes, Don't lie, Be wise and smart, and have a great day. God bless my friends, and I hope you enjoyed the story. To close, like every story should close even though they tell you not to at school, but who cares we will close this way anyway. To close.....
THE END
