How the hell did this happen? Or should that now be hay?

Chapters

The first fight
What do we you call you?
Evasion games and help.
Dreams.....and breakfast?
"You have unlocked a new weapon"
The trolling begins!
I just want some f[buy some apples]g apples!!!
A nefarious plot, a Canterlot Clash.......and the fall
Nightmares and regaining consciousness
Interlude: Back home.
Comfort, and a new job, and a apology.
Meeting Equestria's biggest fucktard.
Who'd thought it? Followed by curiosity almost killing the pony, and a range day.
Why you shouldn't let drivers fly, changing times, and another massage.
Being split up and a possible reuniting party.
A bitch slap sanctioned by Celestia.
Check ups
Broken hearted colt
I hope Rarity knows how to make swimming trunks.......
The Big Pony Apple
Lucky's Seven
Well, I wasn't expecting that.......
The night before the bug hunt.
You locate a bug hole..............
Sorry guys.
It has finally arrived.
Sneak preview: The Changeling Hunters.
Arrival Alpha
Extraction.....of some sort. And a hoof massage.
You don't just walk in to Fluttershy's cottage and leave with your dignity
Arrival round 2

The first fight

“This can't be real. This can't be real. This can't be real. This can't be real.”

Okay, so I was freaking out a little bit. After reading one too many fan fictions about humans waking up here, the fist thing I did was to chamber a round. Heh. Here I am in, apparently Equestria, with a crappy L85A2 that doesn't even have a SUSAT on it, and I'm preparing to defend myself with it? Really, against magic? The fuck is wrong with me?

Once I'd finished my little mental meltdown, to which I'm sure I'd get the chance to have a better one later, I decided to try and find civilisation. Even if it was ponies. Hell for all I know, I wasn't actually on the RLF team, my mates had gotten me completely rat-arsed, and the few who knew I was a brony put me in some collapsing building and made it look like something from the show. It didn't explain my uniform or my rifle, but that's the kind of thing we did to each other!!

I went with the whole “my mates are dicks” routine, and fished out my water bottle, hoping that some nice cold refreshing non-alcoholic liquid might clear my head. Well, it did, but not how I hoped. Turns out I was in that particular castle, which meant I was in Equestria.

Just fucking great!! Every bronies dream, it happened to me by accident, and I've just realised none of us actually know the route from here to Ponyville.....or anywhere else for that matter!!! Wait, if they ask, then I'll tell them they are myths in our world and we know stories of them. Hopefully AJ won't pick up on the half truth there!!

In the end, having a limited supply of water and a not very nutritionally supply of Haribo, I started walking towards the opposite end of the hall where I had seen a door, keeping to the shadows and watching for anything that might like to snack on a fresh human. Hey, you'd be paranoid as well!!! As I pushed the door open, I realised where exactly I was. Another hall, with a stone feature in the middle, that used to house, what I believed them to be anyway, representations of the Elements Of Harmony, and just beyond that...Fuck yes, the main entrance!! Ponyville here I come!!!....After the Everfree forest....fuck!!!

Thinking there was no use waiting around, I made my way cautiously over to the rather tatty looking rope bridge. Okay, just think about this for a second. The ponies maybe small, but surely their combined wait is more than me, right? Gingerly I put a foot out on to the first plank. I felt a sudden rush of adrenaline as I heard a strained creak throughout the wood. I looked around for another way across, but as far as I could see, there wasn't one. Okay, so the wood looks old and will probably break because I don't spread my weight as evenly as a pony. I had a sudden flashback to training when we had to cross a river with just two ropes, and the moron who set it up tied them at the same level!!

Okay, you did this then, you can do it now. It was river then, now it's chasm god (Or should the be Celestia now?) knows how deep. Don't panic. Wait, where'd the rope go?? Before I knew it, I was across on the other side, with solid ground beneath me again. Just as I jumped down, I heard a snap, and watch as the bridge fell away from my side. Heh, I guess that's why I choose 'Lucky' for all my user names!!

I tried to somehow get bearings, but as I didn't know the terrain, I went with my gut instinct from all my time running through woods after my mates with my BB guns. Good times. Even better with beer. I shouldered my rifle and started walking straight ahead. Damn, why didn't I bring a torch?

I had been walking for what felt like days, but in reality, it was a little over four hours. I was beginning to think I'd picked the wrong way when I spied what looked like a landslide, but the cracks in the cliff face didn't look......natural.

Of course!! This is where Nightmare Moon tried to throw them off a cliff!! Wait, just exactly when am I? Shit I hope it's after the episodes I've seen, otherwise things could go from bad to worse pretty fuc...

…...what the hell was that growling? As I turned around, I saw a set of green eyes glowing at me. Timber-wolves. Right, so according to the show, if I break it to pieces, it'll just make itself whole again. Let's what did they give me, armour (with no plating), webbing, field dressing, and a emergency survival kit....for the airfield where I work? Really? What's the poi....wait, it has wind proof matches. Timber-wolves are made of wood...This is the stupidest fucking idea I've ever had.
.

I ripped out the kit from my pocket and grabbed the matches. Time for plan 'A'. “Here doggy doggy doggy, here boy, come get something to eat!!” I said, trying to goad it a bit closer. Unfortunately, it got a bit closer then I wanted it to! About four foot from me, it suddenly leaped, and closed it's jaws around the chest part of my armour holder, and thankfully didn't pierce my skin. It had me pinned, and perhaps it was either a stupid one or luck was still on my side, as I moved my hands closer together and lit a match. I tried to thing of something witty to say, but nothing came to mind.

“Fuck it, burn you wooden piece of shit”, I cried as I thrust the match in to one of it's nostrils. Seriously, who knew they had them. It's eyes suddenly stopped glowing and focused on it's snout before turning tail and running away, as the glow kept getting brighter and brighter. After it went dark again, I felt like I was being watched. It was then I noticed more green eyes looking at me, the had to be at least five more wolves. I took stock of my matches, six left. Okay, lets see how lucky I really am today!! I lit one and looked directly in to the nearest set of eyes and calmly said, “Right then, who's next?”

The reaction was instantaneous. They all turned around and fled whimpering. Wow, if they weren't dogs, they'd make great pussies!! I turned around and continued my trek for around another half an hour before I hit a clearing. I checked my watch and it said Eighteen-thirty-three. Looking to the sky I could see the line where day met night, so it was either dawn or dusk here. Either way I just wanted out of this forest. Trying to find a clue as to which direction to go, I spotted three things that I knew did not belong there, you could tell just by looking. The first was a red ribbon tied in to a bow. The second was a few strands of purple/pink hair. And the third was a orange feather. On the ground nearby was something that made me angry instantly, though I don't know why. There on the grass, was a few patches of blood.

Looking around for more clues, I found six sets of tracks. three were obviously the fillies, so I knew the general direction of Ponyville. The other set made my blood boil. I been there perhaps a total of five hours, and already felt like it was my duty to help. These tracks looked like paw prints, but they were spread out like a humans stride. There was only one type of creature I could think of like that, and I was not going to let those three be left to a fate like that.

Any sane or sensible person would've followed the fillies tracks home and got help or at least raised the alarm. Fortunately, I am neither. I started following the Diamond Dog tracks, and after an hour of walking, the forest finally began to thin. As I got near the edge, I could hear what sound like three little girls crying. I stopped and checked my gear over. Rifle ready to go with a thirty round mag, three spares, total of a hundred and twenty rounds. I hope there aren't that many, or it'll be “Swing batter batter swing!!”.

I pulled out my head-over and put it over my neck. I took out the cam cream and started to break up my face. Once satisfied, I dumped my pack, pulled my head over above my nose, donned my helmet, and started to crawl to a good vantage point....

What do we you call you?

And now you join me back in the action....

Time to check on the target. Wait, what? Their armour is bullet proof?? Fuck!!! Screw centre mass, the next one is going between his fucking eyes, here we go again, get a good grip.....

Just as I took my second breath and held it in coming up to aim, the guard dog, Oh the irony, looked up from the dent in it's armour and straight at me, and that's when I squeezed the trigger the second time. The bullet flew straight and true, and I was reward with brains, blood and bone exploding out the back of it's head. There were three very high pitched screams which could've only come from one source, and just a I was about to approach, two dogs wearing no armour appeared. I didn't recognise them from the show, which meant valid targets, especially as the were both armed with a spear. They looked at the dead guard for a while, whilst I decided which to shoot first. I wasn't give a choice as the bigger of the two approached the fillies and the I heard it's voice.

“Ponies tell us what happened. Now”

The next voice I heard left me a little shocked. I was expecting a brash, tom-coltish voice, or perhaps one with a southern drawl to it. Instead I heard the sweetest voice you could imagine. The show doesn't even do it justice!!

“W-w-we don't know. T-t-there was l-l-l-loud bang and then a dink, and he looked down and back up. And then there was another bang and his head just exploded”

For some reason, the dog asking questions wasn't too happy, but his next statement made me act. Celestia can send me to the sun. There was no way I was letting that happen.

“Ponies tell us truth. Or I stab orange one again. Serve her right for trying to fly away”

As I started to stand I could here a fearful whimper. I gave a quick glance around and realised there were only three sets of dog tracks. I had killed one. Two left. And against a far rock, were two set of armour. Okay, so they were all guard/soldier dogs. As I had the realisation, I made my self known.

“Hey fuck wit!! Leave. The. Fillies. Alone. Or feel my wrath.”

They both turned to look at me and the smaller one gave a snort of laughter, all he could see was the whites of my eyes.

“What is two eyes going to do to us? Stare us too death? Who and what are you?”

By this point they had moved away from the fillies, so I could shoot and not worry about any collateral. I didn't know if this world knew of humans, so I thought I'd play it safe. The big one took a step forward and stopped, realising I wasn't just a set of eyes.

“Ha, he stand like dog, but he has funny fir, and his spear not sharp. He might taste good. I go get him”

Okay, dogs eat meat. And they think my rifle is a spear. Morons. Time to put an end to this!!

“You want to know who I am? Creatures such as yourselves do not deserve to know. As to what I am? I.....am the Demon of the Everfree, and now you shall die.”

This seemed to rile up the small one and he charged at me. If they were slightly more intelligent, then they would've realised that charging me at the same time was the best way to go. Oh well. As Runt, as I decided to call him, came at me, I got ready to move. I saw the spear tip about a metre away and moved to my left. As it passed I grabbed the spear and twisted it out of Runt's grip, swinging around in a three sixty and catching him in the back of his knees. He went down instantly, and I put my foot on his chest, leaning my weight on him. At this time, I was expecting to get gored by Grunt's (that's the other one by the way) spear. This didn't happen, and I was not about to let these two go to do whatever they had done again. Screw the ROE. They don't exist here. I shouldered my rifle and aimed at his head.

“Any last words?”

“NO!! Please!! We do anyth....”Boom!!!!

“Too many words.”

As I turned around, I found out why Grunt hadn't attacked yet. If front of him, with his spear pointing at them were a rough looking Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, but the one that made me angriest was Scootaloo. I could see blood dripping from her left wing, which looked like it was broken as well. I looked Grunt square in the eyes, thankfully already aiming at him.

“You did not want to show them to me. Now you have just made me angry.”

His reply was a bit cockier then I expected. “Ha! You come for little ponies. You no hurt them to get to me! I not give them up! So you leave now!”

“Really? How close do you think I have to be to use this?” I asked, patting my rifle.

He look at Braindead (sue me), a little bit behind him, and I saw his eyes go wide, so he tried to gore one of the fillies, but he wasn't fast enough. I squeezed the trigger, and there was a flash followed by more screaming from the girls, and a howl from Grunt. His left paw was clutching his right arm where I'd shot it, and he was walking backwards dragging his spear limply in his right paw.

I moved forward, never taking my aim off him and got between him and the fillies. Once I ascertained they were safe, I turned my attention back to Grunt. “As I said, by showing them to me, you have made me angry.” I pulled the trigger twice more, rendering his legs useless. I wanted to see him suffer. I walked up to him and put the muzzle right against his snout, and said the same thing I said to Runt. “Any last words?”

Never had I seen such defiance and hatred in anythings eyes as he stared back at me and grinned.

“Yes. Die”

I pulled the trigger as I felt something jab in to my side. A quick dead man check to make sure he was down, I looked to my right.

“Motherfucker!!!” The bastard had managed to get his spear in to his good paw and stuck in just above my kidney, but thankfully not that deep. I pulled it out, Fuck that hurt!!!, and put pressure on the wound, about to use my dressing when I head crying just behind me. Turning around, I saw Applebloom and Sweetie Belle, hugging a now unconscious Scootaloo, whose wing was still bleeding. I did not know how old they were, and I was still young, in human terms. I was not about to be selfish when they still had much to live for. Hell, they still didn't have their Cutie Marks. I set my rifle to safe and slung it around my back, then started limping my way over.

The girls stopped crying and started shaking uncontrollably out of fear. Hell, in that situation, I'd have pissed myself, so they were doing all right. I knelt down beside them and spoke to them in the most gentle voice I could muster.

“Girls, I am not here to harm you, I am here to help you. But you must help me. Where are you saddle bags?”

Sweetie Belle looked me in the eyes, and they must have been radiating kindness or something, for she nodded towards Grunt's body. Sure enough I found some bandages, but not enough. Well, at least they've learnt something from all their crusading! I walked back over and nudged them gently away from Scootaloo. I took my own dressing and wrapped it around the spear wound, not tight enough to block movement, but enough to stop the bleeding. As I tied it off, she stirred and looked at me in complete terror. I was about to explain when someone---sorry, somepony else did for me.

“It's Ok Scoots, he's jus' tryin' to help ya......aren't ya?” I looked up at a hopeful yellow filly looking at me and nodded. I returned my gaze to Scootaloo and put my gloved hand on her cheek. If Pegasus wings are as sensitive as the fandom makes out, this is going to be immensely painful for her, and I don't know if my painkillers will work for them.

I was about to call her by name, but stopped myself just in time. “Young one, this is going to be very painful, but if I do not do this, it could make it worse in the long run. May I continue?” They may be young, but they have a choice. She looked me in the eyes again and nodded, lowering her head and closing here eyes. Here we go, if her scream don't bring any visitors, then we're safe...for now.

I looked to Applebloom and Sweetie Belle, for this I needed their help. “Hold her steady, but allow me access to her wing” They both moved in and held her down by her shoulders and flanks. I grabbed Runt's spear and broke the wood in two. I needed a splint of some sort.

“Okay, on the count of three.”

“One”

“Two”

“Three" As I said it out loud, I moved the wing to what looked like a more natural position. As long as we got her to hospital quick it should be all right. The screams that rent through the air were bone-chilling, and as I splinted her wing in to position, she finally cave to the pain and lost consciousness again. I left her on the ground with the other two and dragged the bodies over to the rock. I picked up the fillies saddle bags, Scootaloo and told the others to follow. I left them at the tree line and told them NOT to look. If these dogs were operating from a pack, the others needed a warning. I grabbed the tip of Runt's spear, and with Braindead being the largest, carved a message in to his chest.

I am the Demon of the Everfree. All
ponies who enter here are under my
protection. If you try to claim any as
your own, you will meet the same fate.

After I finished my grim task I head back to the girls. With an extra bandage, I made a makeshift pouch to carry Scootaloo on my back, whilst the other two split the contents of her saddle bag between them. I should have used it on my wound, but their needs came first. This wasn't from any sort of training, it's just who I was. I could then head back through the forest to the clearing, then follow the fillies tracks to Ponyville, and to safety for them. And to try grab a bandage for the hole in my side!!

As we were about to set off, I head a timid voice behind me, and turned to see Sweetie Belle looking at me with a mix of hope and fear on her face as she posed her question.

“Are you really a Demon of the Everfree?”

“No. No I'm not. I just said that in the hopes they would give you up peacefully”

“Did you save just so you could make us your slaves? O-o-or eat us?”

“......I...I stepped in because it is the right thing to do, and yes, I do eat meat.”

“What do we you call you? Because “Demon” isn't a very nice name”

“You can call me.....” Fuck it, why not? I have been since I got here. Hell, even my bleeding has stopped!! “.....Lucky”

“Okay Mr Lucky!!” Man, that makes me feel old!! “Wait, why are we heading back in to the forest?”

“Listen young one, I am not from.....around here. I do not know my way, so we will head back to where you encountered the dogs, and then on to your home from there. But you must be quiet from here until we get there. By the way, what is your home called?” I can't just come out and say it.

“We live in Ponyville.”

“Sounds nice. Lets get going, and remember, no talking from now on.”

I got two nods in return.

Author's Note

So here's how things will go. Between my job, reading ponies, and blowing shit up on my Xbox, I will try to get some more writing done. I am currently editing Ch 4, and will post it as soon as I'm done, the rest will come sporadically. I have no schedule and they will be done when they are done.

Now some advice I was given was not to make this a Gary Stu. As you might have gathered, this is a self insert. The events preceding my arrival in Equestria actually happened, but went off without a hitch. Now as to the Gary Stu bit, I am not strong, I am not fast, and I am not intelligent. Well, enough that the I'm paid to fix planes.....and am fit enough for the job.

I will not start using magic. I will not gain vast amounts of speed and strength. I will gain some over the current time period I have planned, but nothing drastic. And I will not be immune to magic.....well, most of it. I have some plans for being a jackass and annoying a certain librarian. Any advice you can give will be greatly received, unless it's just "you suck, go away", which will be promptly ignored. I have written this with no pre-reader or editor, so if you spot any mistakes, please point them out.

Evasion games and help.

It must've have been raining before I arrived, as my boot prints we easily visible in the fading light. There was just enough to see by, but there was no chance of me hitting anything with my rifle. Hell, I'd never done a live night shoot!! We followed the tracks until we couldn't see them any more, so I stopped and made sure we were alone before turning my attention to the fillies, and started speaking in a whisper.

“Hey, do you two have anything in your bags that can be used for a fire?”

They looked each other in confusion, and then started rummaging around. Moments later I was given a stack full of what looked like paper, but it was thin like sugar paper and glowing, being informed that they had "liberated" them from Twilight. Okay, radioactive paper, that can't be healthy!! Crouching down, and feeling around, my hands found what they were looking for, a nice long stick. Taking the strange paper and wrapping it around one end, I prepared to strike a match when I saw five sets of glowing green eyes, and a set of some very pissed off red ones.

Well, look who came back for more pain. “Girls, when I light this, I want you to promise not to scream, okay?”

I felt two warm bodies pull up close behind my legs and struck the match. The sets of eyes seemed to think twice before the red ones advanced on me. “Hey there Smokey, back for some more?” I asked as I held the match out, watching him eye it cautiously. I slowly drew it back and he came closer. That's when the match hit the paper and all hell broke loose. The area was bathed in a strange blue light, coming from my makeshift torch. I could now see how many Timber-wolves there were, and even on my own I'd have trouble getting away!! There had to be forty of the bloody things!!!

Thankfully for myself and the fillies, the hell that broke out was simply the wolves as they panicked and tried to get away, running in to tress, rocks and each other. Smokey was the last to go, with what sounded like a disappointing growl. I'll have to deal with him later, Scootaloo needs help!! But there was one question at the forefront of my mind, and I just had to ask it.

“Girls, what exactly is in this stu.....you know what, never mind. I don't even want to know!!”

We resumed our trek, and eventually make it back to the clearing, where Applebloom, of all ponies, was almost sick at remembering what happened here. I was about to tell her it was okay, that they were safe now, but I couldn't outright lie to her. Thankfully, and worryingly, a pained whisper came from behind me as Scootaloo spoke.

“It's okay Applebloom, we're almost home. We can get help there”

The distraught filly's ears perked at her friends voice, and she nodded once, taking the lead along the way they had come to the clearing. I fell in to step behind, checking my watch and noting it was past 8 in the evening. Ponyville is going to be hive of activity when we arrive.

It didn't take long, perhaps another hour or so, to reach the Ponyville side of the Everfree. Even still, I kept an eye out for anything that might cross our paths. We snuck in to an alley way and Sweetie Belle led the way towards the hospital, treating it as some kind of sneaking game. As we crossed a main road, I saw a gathering around the town hall. Damn, that must be all the adult ponies who live here. That's a lot of ponies!!

As we entered another alley on the other side, I caught the tail end of a speech, which could only be coming from one pony......

“....so as I was saying, we have searched every house from top to bottom twice, all the shops and community buildings, and there is still no sign of the fillies. There can be only one place they've gone, even though we have told them never to go there alone. So we will spread out along the border of the Everfree, and look for signs of them there!”

As Twilight finished up, she turned to the mayor and informed her of what to do next. “I shouldn't be long, but if they went to see Zecora, then they're probably still with her. I'll be back in a jiffy” Preparing to venture in to the forest alone, she was shocked when a little colt ran up to her.

“Miss Sparkle, Miss Sparkle, we found something!”

“Pip, how many times do I have to say call me Twilight? Now what have you found?”

The colt gave her a bashful smile, and turned around. “Come on, I'll show you”, he called as he started galloping off to a section of the border. Twilight sighed and followed, stopping at what she saw. There in the mud were the tracks of three fillies. And about thirty metres further along, where Pipsqueak now stood waiting, were more tracks heading in to Ponyville. Two belonged to fillies. The other set, she had no clue about, and she instantly set about gathering more information.

“Everypony come here!!!” She had been given permission to us the Traditional Royal Voice in emergencies, such as now, and once she had most of the other ponies around her she continued. “Pip has found these tracks. There are three filly tracks going out, but two coming in. With something else!”

There were audible gasps all round, and before mass panic set in, an all ready panicked Twilight stepped in.

“Here's what's going to happen. AJ and Pinkie, you head around town and see if you spot any signs of them. Rainbow and Fluttershy, gather up the other Pegasi and start a patrol over the town. Rarity and I will follow these tracks. Everypony else, make a perimeter around the town. Nothing in, nothing out. Not even Celestia or Luna themselves!!”

By this point, we had made it to Ponyville General. I marched straight in not worrying about scaring any ponies that maybe in reception. Instead it was deserted. Shrugging, I set Scootaloo gently down on the desk, and turned towards the other two.

“I am going to get help, stay here okay?”

I got two nods as they climbed up next to Scootaloo to wait. Right, time to find a nurse. As I walked round one corner, I heard a loud gasp. Easing myself against the wall, I spotted Nurse Redheart fussing over Scootaloo and giving orders to a orderly. I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding in. She's safe now, and so are the other two. Time to patch myself up and get out of here.

I turned back to the corridor and looked for a supply cupboard. There was one half way down the hall, so I slipped inside and couldn't believe my luck, it was stocked with everything I needed.

Placing my gear on the floor, I took my jackets and t-shirt off, then grabbed some swabs and cleaned the area, getting my first good look. It was a clean cut, and not very deep as I thought. Another inch or so and it could've punctured a lung. I grabbed a bottle of anti-septic and hesitated slightly. Grabbing a spare bandage, I shoved it in my mouth as I poured the liquid on in copious amounts, the bandage doing it's job and muffling my groans. After emptying the bottle, I slapped a dressing on it and began to wrap a bandage around my midsection. Tying it off, I put my clothes back on and picked up my gear.

Hopefully, the lobby is clear, as I hadn't seen any other exits on the way in. As I came close, Scootaloo, Redheart, and the orderly had disappeared. Now was my chance to slip out and observe from a distance. As I approached the corner, I heard two very animated voices talking to what must be other ponies.

“....and then there was a second loud bang, and the dog's head exploded!”

“An' when the other two came runnin', it stood up and told them to leave us alone.”

“It then said something and finished with shouting 'I.....am the Demon of the Everfree, and now you shall die'.”

“An' on the way back through the forest, it faced down a load o' Timber-wolves, mainly one called 'Smokey', an' when it lit some of Miss Sparkles special paper, it set off a blue flame an' scarred them all away!!”

“And the best part is, it did most of that after helping Scootaloo and carrying her all the way back!”

“Well, shoot, Ah don' think Ah like the sound o' this critter.” Thanks AJ, for giving me a chance!!

“I can't say that I agree with you Applejack.” Ah, Miss Rarity, giving a chance before judging me. “Sweetie Belle, didn't you say that it was injured as well?”

“Yeah, when it....I think it was actually a he.....was bandaging Scootaloo up, I noticed some blood on his side, but we started to walk before I could ask him about it. And he used the last bandage to carry Scoots.” Damn, they saw that?

“You see Applejack my dear? He held the lives of the fillies over his own. What kind of critter, as you so kindly put it, would do such a thing?”

“He sounds pretty cool to me, standing up for others. But I think I know what's bugging AJ. It's that he killed those Diamond Dogs without thinking from what they said.” To the point as always, Dash.

The next voice I heard, while as adorable as you'd think, shocked me with the content of what it conveyed.

“um, he killed them to protect others. Isn't that the role of a soldier? If you don't mind me saying...”
Oh god, right in the hnng metre!!!

“I wonder if he likes parties?” Fuck, why couldn't she be locked up in this reality?? Okay, ways of avoiding a pink ball of fluff......nope, got nothing.

“Girls, until we know exactly what we're dealing with nopony is allowed to go anywhere on their own. They must be with at least one other outside. It, or even he, may seem to have out best interests at heart, but there is no denying 'he' is dangerous.” Ah, the rationality and level headedness of Ponyville's resident freak-out mare, one miss.....

“Twilight Sparkle!!”

“Yes mayor? Oh, of course, I'll be right back girls.”

At the latching of the door, I realised now was my chance to escape, and a luck would have it, the light switch for the lobby was just within reach. I recalled the layout as best as I could and clicked the lights off.

“What in tarnation? Who the hay turned out the lights?”

“I'll get them.....wait, what's that sound??”

All panic stopped as they started to listen closely. I carried on making my way towards the door, albeit a bit slower, but still, even I could hear it now.

Thud......thud......thud.......thud.........thud....

“It's heading to the door, RD get the lights.”

I realised I still had a sheet of Twilight's “special” paper and my matches. Well, it worked as a pretty good flashbang before, let's see if it works again. As I struck the match I could hear two little fillies draw in their breath in excited anticipation. The little flame pulsed amidst the slight gust from, I'm guessing, Rainbow's wings, as I touched it to the paper. As expected it flared really bright, but I all ready had my eyes closed, and I finally made it to door which I had cracked open just as there were two squeals of joy.......followed by five screams of terror.

One final thought flew through my head as I ran outside. Fuck. I think maybe I should be in the running of the going now. The fast running.

Dreams.....and breakfast?

Early the next morning, so early the sun had not risen yet, a very quiet pegasus knocked on the back door to Sugarcube Corner. She didn't want to use the front door, as she didn't want anypony to know of her plans.....expect the one who's help she needed. Unfortunately, it was not Pinkie that answered, but Mrs Cake.

“Oh good morning deary. How can I help? Oh, but why are you at the back door, surely you meant to come in the front?”

“um, good morning Mrs Cake, I was wondering if Pinkie is around as I wanted to talk to her. If you don't mind.”

“Of course deary, she's looking after the twins whilst we plan our next special cake for Hearts Warming. They're are upstairs in the foals room, but be warned, they are all a bit boisterous this morning.”

“Okay, thank you Mrs Cake.” As she made her way out to the store front and upstairs, she greeted Mr Cake in her usual friendly manner. Cresting the last step, she gave a start as the foal's room door swung open and a all-white mare trotted out. “Oh good morning miss. Is my friend Pinkie Pie in there? I need to talk to her.”

The other pony opened her eyes and then shook off all the flour from her coat and mane before tackle hugging the slightly nervous yellow mare. “Fluttershy!! I knew one of my friends was coming by, but I couldn't tell who, as I have a different Pinkie Sense for all of you, but when they all went off, it either meant you were all coming or somepony was coming to talk to me about something they didn't want others to know yet!!!

Fluttershy just let her brain reboot as it scrambled to intercept the hundred-words a second speech Pinkie had just spouted not an inch from her face. “Um, good morning Pinkie. How are you today?”

“I'm good Fluttershy, how are you? Oh, but you didn't come by just to ask me that did you? Now what can Auntie Pinkie do for you?

“You know, I am a year......um, never mind. Well, you know when Rarity said about finding that creature, if it was disguised like the forest?” The pink mare bounced her head up and down as she listened. “Well, I went to where in entered, and it didn't go back to the Everfree. He went to Whitetail Woods.”

Pinkies eyes widened as comprehension kicked in. She got off Fluttershy and motioned her in to the foals room, who were both fast asleep. Dropping her voice to a whisper, the pegasus continued to tell her friend her plan. “Well, the guards aren't looking in there for him, so there is a good chance we can find him first. I think that if we can, then he won't run. If I'm right, and he is a soldier, then he probably sees the guards as enemies.”

“Okay, so what do you need my help for? You're the one who's good with woodland critters.”

“I know, but after he ran in there last night, they all abandoned their homes. I was wondering if any of your Pinkie Senses might pick him out”

“Okay, just give me a minute.” Pinkie then proceeded out of the room and downstairs, leaving Fluttershy to ponder following her. As she was about to move, Pinkie bounced back in to the room. “Okay, I spoke to the Cakes, and they'll sort the foals out when they wake up. Let's go!”

Trotting down the stairs and outside, Pinkie followed Fluttershy to where they saw a strange imprint in the mud. “Huh, that doesn't look like his hoof prints to me.”

“No Pinkie, that's where Rainbow dropped him. He landed on his flank.”

“Ohhhh....wait, I'm getting something......” Fluttershy turned to her friend, and sure enough, something was happening. Pinkie's mane and coat we moving as if there was a full force gale blowing at her, when there was no more than a gentle breeze everywhere else. “....I know where he is.”

With nothing else to say, Pinkie started trotting in to the woods, with Fluttershy following her. After around an hour walking straight and saying nothing, Pinkie stopped, sat down and closed her eyes. To anypony else, she would have looked like she was mediating in the woods, but Fluttershy shy knew different.

“He's up there, on the largest branch, about half way up. I'll wait down here for you to come back.” She said pointing at a massive tree.

I walked for what felt like hours. There were no landmarks, there were no trees, there were no animals. There is only this path. I can not go back. The path disappears behind me. I can not change direction, for this place will not allow me. I can only move forwards, along a darken path, with no light sources what so ever.

I hear growling around me, and notice glowing eyes. This must be my punishment for torturing Smokey. Wonder what's going to happen when it comes to Runt, Grunt and Braindeads turn? As I continue forwards, more features start to show themselves. These timber-wolves are massive. So big, that the three largest have Diamond Dogs on them. No prizes for guessing who they were.

At a signal from Grunt, they all surged towards me. I went to cock my rifle, but then noticed something wrong about it. I have a L85A2. In my grip was something that didn't exist....yet. I took a double take at the ammo counter on the top of it, noticing the blue lights had “60” displayed. I also noticed that instead of black leather gloves and DPM patterned sleeves, my limbs were now covered in a very light shade of red.

“Wait, what? An MA5B and PINK armour? This has to be a dream. My own fucking dream and my subconscious turns me in to freaking Donut?

I racked a round in to the chamber and went to fire, but nothing happened. Pulling the mag, I was expecting to find it empty, and the ammo counter frozen. Was I that lucky? Fuck no. Sat in the magazine were crayons. Motherfucking crayons! “Really brain? First you put me in pink, and now you've given me Caboose's gun? Just what the fuck is wrong with you?”

I didn't have time to continue my self-interrogation, as the nearest wolf was at an arms length. Oh well, at least the gun is real. Stepping forward, I lashed out and caught it on the nose. Hard. The impact sent it sprawling back, as it's rider jumped off. Runt. I went to hit him, but he pulled my own move on me, wrenching the rifle out of my grip. I didn't know what to do as Runt suddenly pulled out a fresh mag, this one I could clearly see loaded with bullets. I looked around my visor trying to find the shield bar, which to my horror, was dead, and not recharging. By this point, Runt had removed the crayon and chambered a round. I tried to run at him, Mjölnir is supposed to make you stronger and faster, but I couldn't move. There was only one thing that I could do, and it was exactly what I did.

No, it was not die with dignity. It was the opposite. “Hey Runt!! I'd just like to let you know that my last memory alive is going to be what happened between me and your mother last night. She really is a bitch, in bed anyway!”

Screaming in anger, he clicked the safety off and fired. He we go, at least I did something right getting those fillies home. As I hear the click of a rifle with no bullets in, I opened my eyes, and got quite a shock.

There, standing in front of me, warping her magic in to a shield, was the princess of the night and dreams, Luna. Keeping the shield up she turned to me. “Only you have the power to vanquish the demons of you mind and heart. Know that what you did to these three, whilst cruel, was necessary.” A quick flash of her horn, and both she and the shield had disappeared. Only I have the power huh?

As Runt pulled out a new mag, I thought about what I needed. A new weapon, one with enough power to deal with them, and the ability to move. As I thought this my armour started to glow, and when it faded, I was left with green now covering me. Floating the air in front of me was a M739 LMG. Damn, I really do play Halo too much. Grabbing the weapon and checking to see that it was loaded with bullets, I chambered a round and stared at my attackers. It was just the Diamond Dogs left, but they were all wearing their armour.

“So, that armour can deflect a 5.56 round? Wonder what it does against 7.62 FMJ-AP rounds?”
Clicking the safety off, only one more thought came to me before I let rip.

“Let's ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!”

Fluttershy nodded and took wing, gracefully flying up and coming to a stop when she saw it. Lying on the branch against the thick trunk, huddled over for warmth, was the creature. Fear instantly took hold, but also her caring nature when it rolled over and she caught sight of the bandage around its midsection. She was about to wake it up when it turned again, and in it's limbs was the metal object, no doubt a weapon of some kind. All of a sudden, a shudder went though it and continued for a few seconds before starting again.

“Oh dear, you must be cold having spent the night out here, and hungry too. Don't go anywhere I'll be back soon” As she took wing again, she met Pinkie still sat down and with her eyes closed. “Pinkie, are you okay?”

Pinkie slowly opened her eyes and looked at Fluttershy, a contemplative look usually reserved for academics on her face. “I know some times you and the others think I'm strange, with how random things can be around me, not to mention my Pinkie Sense.” Fluttershy made to interject but a raised hoof bid her to hold her piece. “The whole reason my cutie mark is balloons and I like making others laugh is because of the true nature of my cutie mark. I can hear and feel the souls of others and what they need to make them smile. I felt your fear as you saw it up there. I felt his soul as well, and his is a kind one. He would not hurt us unless he had to. But I think we should keep his location to ourselves for now. Maybe he'd like some breakfast?”

Fluttershy was shocked at the seriousness with what had just come out of Pinkie at a normal pace, and returned her greeting from the morning, tackle hugging the mare as she spoke. “Oh thankyouthankyouthankyoutahnkyou!!!! He seemed cold as well, so I'll go get him some blankets whilst you get the food, and well' meet back here okay?”

Pinkie just nodded and they took off in different directions, both with a mission their own, but one with which they could not ask for help.

As I stood the looking at the smouldering bodies of the Diamond Dogs, I felt a strange feeling come over me.

“Why do I feel guilty for killing them? I did it to save those fillies. Who knows what would have happened to them if I didn't do anything. Surely Scootaloo would have died from blood loss, as they hadn't done anything to help her. Did I do wrong?”

As the emotions crowded over me, one finally over took the others. Despair. I was in Equestria, I had killed three of their citizens, threatened the personal student of it's leader, and attacked the guards. And I don't know if I can go home.

I took the helmet off so that my tears wouldn't flood and drown me. I had smelled blood mixed with gunpowder before and was expecting that horrible smell. Instead, I was drawn towards the nearest body, and I gave it a tentative sniff.

“Eggs? Why the fuck does this dead body smell like scrambled egg?”

All off a sudden the dark area got lighter. There was no sun rising, and no other light sources. Everything just seemed to get brighter.

I awoke gripping my rifle and instantly sat up. Not that I could've shot anything with the blood rushing to my head, but then I realised why I had smelt eggs in my dream. There, on a plate in front of me, was enough scrambled egg on toast to feed my entire shift at work, and a tray of blueberry muffins. Which is to say a lot!! As I shrugged off my blanket, I leaned for......wait, blanket?

As I looked around for my mysterious host, I heard the best thing I ever awoke to, and started in on my break fast with a smile

Author's Note

Just to let you know, that "special cake" is a shout out to one of my favourite stories on here, the second one I read if I remember correctly.

Anyway, as a unintentional shout out (seriously, I didn't even think about it until I had typed it!), go read this one.
A Sweet Taste Of Cake by The Descendant. Go read it. Now.

Yeah, I know, that's 4 references to it now!! Should hear me and my mates playing online, there's always quotes flying around. Mainly when someone gets shot by friendly fire as all you will hear then is "Tucker did it". So yeah have them as ponies.

"You have unlocked a new weapon"

“Hey, has anypony seen Fluttershy? We're late for our spa appointment.”

At this everypony turned to the newcomer, and ushered her in to the library. Rainbow was the first to speak up. “We were just talking about that. Tank woke me up early being sick and I was worried, so I took him to Fluttershy's just after eight, but she wasn't there. I left Tank there and came here to see if I could find her.”

At this Rarity grew quite concerned. “So none of you have seen her this morning?” Get head shakes all around, she posed her next question as Shining Armour walked in. “Do....you...think that the creature got her?” The was a slam as the door was shut and orders were barked followed by the thundering of hooves as the guard took off to begin searching.

Twilight was the next to speak, the mud on her coat and in her mane examples of what she had been doing that morning. “No, she lives near the Everfree. The creature ran in to Whitetail.” As she was about to continue, the door burst open with a ragged looking farmer standing there.

“Everypony, we have a problem!!! Ah just saw Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie coming back from the woods with a smile on their faces!! They then just nodded and went their separate ways!”

Twilight instantly started to over think things. “Do you think they found it? How are they not injured? Why didn't they come to us??” A blue hoof clamped her muzzle shut as Rainbow stared in to her eyes.

“Calm down. Here's what we should do. You and AJ go talk to Pinkie Pie. Me and Rarity will go talk to Fluttershy. Nod if you agree?”

Twilight gently moved her head up and down, and Rainbow released her grasp. She turned towards the door and started walking. “Thanks Rainbow. Okay girls, lets go get us some information!!!”

Damn, those eggs were good. I bet they were fresh as well.

Finishing up a blueberry muffin, how did she know they were my favourite?, I gathered up my gear and thought about what to do next. I can't just go wondering back in to town. Maybe I should head back to the castle and see if there are any clues there. I stowed the rest of the muffins in my bag, and considered what gear to take. If there was a CBRN skin threat, it was all ready too late for me. I felt fine, so I took my NBC suit out and left it in the tree. That left me deciding between my S10 and my GSR. The GSR was fairly new in to service, and when I went on a week long course to learn about it, some more information came to light.

Our course had been chosen to test a new feature, not just the respirators, but in general. Apparently, some eggheads down at R&D had come up with a HUD system, using a layer of LCD inside the visor. My GSR happened to be one of these. They linked to sensors on the weapon to give a general area of aim, showing up just like a video game, and they had even put a motion sensor on it. Unfortunately, my rifle was bog standard. No sensors or anything. S10 it is then. Plus it's smaller, so less to carry.

Climbing out of the tree, I remembered I had just woke up. Time to answer the call of nature. Finishing my business, I set off in the opposite direction from town, hoping to find my tracks from the day before, not knowing I was in a different forest. Hey, trees all look the same to me!!!

“Good afternoon Pinkie Pie, do you have any time to talk?”

The pink mare turned from the back counter to see an eager looking Twilight and Applejack. She guessed what this was about, and with Applejack there, it would be harder not to tell her the truth. “Oh sure girls, just let me finish up, and I'll be right with you okay?” Nodding the two grabbed some snacks and trotted over to a table to wait.

A short while later, Pinkie let out a sigh before she trotted over to her friends and sat opposite them. “So girls, what did you want to talk about? Are you planning a surprise party? Because I'm the best choice for parties you know!”

Applejack pulled off her hat and set it on the table, giving a sign that this was a serious thing. “Actually, Pinkie, we were wondering what you an' Fluttershy were doing in Whitetail Wood this morning?”

“Well, she asked for my help in tracking down an animal, thinking that my Pinkie Sense might pick up on it. We found it and she helped it, and you must have seen us when we came back to town!”

“Well, there's your answer AJ, it was just Fluttershy being Fluttershy. I've got to get back to the library.” As she made to leave, Applejack began speaking again.

“Pinkie, Ah am shocked at you. Never have Ah know you to lie, even if it's just a small one.” Twilight turned around as she continued. “You an' Fluttershy went to look for it, didn't you?”

At this Pinkie's head dropped, and she knew that their secret was out, and there was no denying it now. “Yes”

All of a sudden, her head was yanked up and she found herself staring in to a set of lavender eyes wide with worry and excitement. “Did you find it?”

“Yes.” Twilight and Applejack gasped, and seeing no reason not to, she continued. “Fluttershy was worried that it might still be injured, so we went to look for it. It was hiding up a tree, so she flew up to take a look. When she came back she told me it looked cold and hungry, so we came back. She went to get a blanket, and I grabbed some muffins. When we met up again, Fluttershy had the blanket and had cooked some eggs for it. When we got back she flew up there and delivered it. She then came back down, and we returned to town.” She drew in a deep breath before finishing. “There, that's all of it. So what now?”

Twilight spun around and ran in to the kitchen. “Mr and Mrs Cake!! We need to take Pinkie to the library, she and Fluttershy went looking for the creature, and found it!!!”

At this, she was pushed out of the kitchen, followed by the bakers themselves. “Take her, this is too important to ignore.”

“Thank you both, I'll try to have her back as soon as possible.” Setting her attention on the downcast mare sat at the table, she wrapped a hoof around her. “It's okay Pinkie, we're not upset, we were just worried. Applejack, go find the others. Pinkie, come on, lets go to the library and sort this out.”

As I made my way through the forest, something didn't feel right. I thought the Everfree was supposed to be dark even during the day, but I can see everything in here. My thoughts came to an end as the trees started to thin. Thinking I had gone the wrong way, I slowed and edged my way forward. It wasn't Ponyville I saw in front of me, it was a cliff on the opposite side of a canyon. Ghastly Gorge. It has to be. Looking down, I could see the river at its bottom, and I followed the flow with my eyes. I could see holes in one side of the canyon wall, and that confirmed my suspicions. Looking upstream, I spotted something that made my heart jump.

Sticking out above the tree line there was a structure, a tower to be precise, that looked old and dilapidated. Perfect, just where I wanted to go. There was just one small problem, it looked like it was on the other side of the canyon. Sighing, I looked along my edge and noted the tree line followed the edge almost exactly. Perfect, I still got cover. Moving back under the trees, I started off in the direction of the tower.

“She's still not here? She must have gone to look after some animals. Why don't head you back to the boutique, I'm sure you've got work to do right?”

As Rarity was about to respond, a shout from outside drew their attention. “Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow!! Where y'all at?” As they went outside, they met Applejack galloping across Fluttershy's bridge. “Wh.....wh......where's Fluttershy?”

“Applejack, do calm down dear. You will just injure yourself otherwise. As for Fluttershy, she has not returned yet. Now, what has you all riled up like this?”

“Pinkie an' Fluttershy went for looking for that thing, and they found it!!”

This instantly gained Rainbows attention. “Whoa, really? Was it all sneaky like in the hospital?”

“No, Pinkie said it was sleeping.”

“Did they wake it up?”

“No not right away. Pinkie said Fluttershy went to look and said it looked cold an' hungry, so they went to collect a blanket and get some food for it. It was on their way back when Ah noticed them. Twilight has taken Pinkie to the library. Now we just need to find Fluttershy.”

Not having an idea of where to look, they trotted back in to the cottage. Rarity spotted Fluttershy's appointment schedule on the side and opened it up. “Girls, we must go now. It says here that after our spa appointment that she has a check up with Owlowiscious.” She gave a glance at the clock. “In ten minutes!”

The ponies looked at each other before galloping out the door.

Turns out that if karma really does exist in Equestria, then it gives the bad to me in my dreams. The canyon had twisted away to the right, and as I followed it the tower was on my side of the river. The ground had started to gradually rise until I was almost climbing up the side. It wasn't straight up, but it was definitely a higher angle then forty five degrees. Making it to the top, and feeling completely fucked, I took a moment to rest. After catching my breath, I made my way back inside to where I had arrived, and noted it was still dark. Making my way over to where a window should be, I started to remove the vegetation that was blocking the light.

Turning back, I noticed the other stuff that had made it through. Sitting in a hole in the wall was a RB211. Well, that's not right! That should be mounted to a wing of a C17. What the fuck is it doing in the wall? I'm not a pilot, and with out the rest of the aircraft, it was just a heap of scrap. Continuing my search, I spotted some wooden crates balanced precariously on a ledge.

“Well, only one way to get them down.” I checked around to make sure it was safe and then put down my gear, removing my field jacket. Reaching up to the ledge, I grabbed the nearest crate and yanked it off. The rest followed as they were all tethered to each other, and I was rewarded by a series of cracks as they burst open. Inspecting the first one, I grew excited. Spread around the floor were little brown boxes. Stamped on a side of each box was the following:

5.56mm x 45mm
L2A2 BALL
x 30 rounds

“Fuck yes, ammo!!! At least I'm not going to run out soon!!” Getting over my giddiness, I moved to the second destroyed crate. Inside I could make out the muzzle of a rifle, so I started out removing the broken wood. After doing so, I was rewarded with not one, but two rifles. One, another L85A2, the other a M4A1. But more importantly, both of these weapons had the sensor system installed. I should have brought my GSR. In the bottom of the crate was a small black case, which I opened right away. Sitting in it was a HK USP .45 Auto, fitted with the aiming sensors. Okay, if this isn't all a dream, then damn. I always wanted one of these!!! It was then I remembered that it only came in .45 ACP, .40 S&W, and 9mm.

Going back to the ammunition, I started to organise them, hoping there was some ammo for the pistol. Once I was finished, I had three piles. The largest was the 5.56 rounds. The smallest was the .45 rounds. However the middle pile was 7.62 rounds. Both the L85's and the M4 were 5.56, so what were these for? As I looked around, I spotted what looked like a rifle case teetering on the edge of a broken wall. It slipped off the edge, outside the wall, and I just managed to grab the handle in time.

Pulling in the crate, I noted in was longer than the M4, and it was definitely a rifle case. But it was padlocked, and there was no sign of the keys. Now I was not worrying about running out of bullets, I picked up the USP and a empty mag, which now littered the floor from the third box, I bombed up and chambered a round. I pointed it at the padlock and fired. The resulting echo made my ears ring, but it had done it's job. Opening the crate my eyes grew wide. Sitting in foam padding was a stock, a bi-pod, a barrel, and a body with a scope on it. Pulling it out, I started to piece it together. I looked at the barrel and I knew just what the 7.62 were for now. And it also had the sensors built in to the main body. There was even a complete user guide for all weapons with the sensor systems in there.

“Well, time to get my GSR.”

If I had known just how “easy” that would be, my last sentence would have been “Fuck you, Murphy.”

Author's Note

Yep, Murphy's law comes in to play soon. Anyone want to guess how?

Oh, and to the 14 of you who have Favorited this story? You're all bucking crazy.

But thanks, I appreciate it.

The trolling begins!

“Chin up Pinkie, we're not angry with you, and we don't have to tell Shining Armour about this. Not yet anyway.”

At this, Pinkies expression instantly rose, and she started bouncing alongside Twilight just like her usual self. As they were about to step through the door way, the others rushed up to them, and Rarity began to explain between her deep breaths. “Twi....Twi....Twilight.....Fluttershy...is...all.....ready here!”

The gears in Twilight's head started spinning when she recalled it was Owlowiscious' check up day. They all burst in just as Fluttershy was coming from the kitchen, blissfully unaware of her audience. “Okay, Owlowiscious, that's it for today, and I'm happy to say you're as healthy as ever.”

“Fluttershy!”

Opening her eyes to the noise, she was met with the concerned faces of four of her friends, and a very sheepish Pinkie Pie, who instantly darted forward and hugged her friend, almost crying. “I'm sorry Fluttershy, but they asked me about it and the sent Applejack to talk to me, and you know we can't lie to her!!” As she was about start off on one of her speeches, Fluttershy interjected before she could continue.

“Pinkie Pie, it's okay. We would have had to tell them eventually. How much did you tell them?”

“Just what we did for it, getting it a blanket and some food.”

“Okay then, there is nothing to worry about.” Turing to the others, she posed a question that she all ready knew the answer to. “I suppose you all want to see it then?” There was a chorus of excited replies, and it left little doubt that she could go home before showing them. “Okay then, Pinkie Pie, would you like to lead the way?”

Pinkie drew away and rubbed her eyes before nodding and starting to trot out the door. As Fluttershy started walking, Applejack came up beside her. “Jus' what did Pinkie mean when she said she only told us what y'all did for it?”

A quick glance forward and she saw Pinkie's ears droop a little bit, and it was with this action that she replied. “I'm sorry Applejack, but Pinkie told me something in confidence. I'm sure she will tell you all when she feels the time is right.” Another glance forward and Pinkie's ears had perked up again.

“Okay, as much as Ah would like to know, Ah can wait for Pinkie to tell me.” They continued to walk in silence until a voice spoke up.

“We're here.” Everypony came to a halt behind Pinkie Pie, and looked at the massive tree. “But don't get too excited, he's not here right now.”

“But I had so many questions I wanted to ask it!!! Fluttershy, Rainbow, can you fly up there to see if there are any clues as to where it went?” A quick nod followed by the flap of wings, they waited for a moment before the peace was broken by Rainbows laughter. Flying back down, she came carrying what looked like trousers and a jacket, and some sort of bag. Fluttershy gently glided down beside her with a big smile on her face, and the plate balanced on her back.

“So come on then Rainbow, what was so funny?” At this Fluttershy stepped forward and set the plate down. There in the remains of the egg was a smiley face. And made out of crusts from the toast was the words “thank you”.

“You see girls, he may be dangerous, but he does have a caring heart after all.”

“Okay Fluttershy, I know it was wrong for me to panic. I don't know why he left this stuff behind, but we can at least look after it for him for now. Come on, lets get back to the library.”

They all turned to leave except for Pinkie Pie, who just stayed sat down with her eyes closed again, and Fluttershy noticed this. “um, can you give us a moment girls. We'll catch up okay?”

They looked at each other before nodding and trotting off.

“Pinkie?”

“It's okay Fluttershy, I was just waiting for them to go. Look over there.” Following Pinkie's outstretched hoof, she saw the light reflecting off something made of glass and gave a smile. Both she and Pinkie waved in that direction before leaving.

Having decided to go get the rest of my stuff, I started to organise just what I was going to take back with me. There was a holster for the pistol, and a magazine pouch for five spares. I was going to do some observation of the town as well, and even though the new L85 and the M4 had scopes on, I wanted to be at quite the distance.

Reading the manual for the sniper rifle, I found out it was actually a prototype, and have never been fired in the field. Maybe I was going to get to test it. Maybe not. Placing the 7.62 rounds in the magazines, I took stock of my armaments. One USP with six x twelve round magazines, and the sniper rifle with ten x five round magazines. Stowing both the weapons I placed my helmet back on and started my way out.

I planned to use the same route to get here, and had gathered the ropes from the crates together. Turns out it was just one long rope looped around a few times. Hopefully it was long enough. Tying in to one of the sturdier looking trees, I threw the rest over the edge and took a peek. It looked like it ended at the bottom, so I started the climb down.

Reaching the end of the rope, I had still had about five metres to go, so I turned around and carefully made my way back down the rest of the way. I followed the tree line to where I had left a marker in the ground, telling me what way to go next. Ha, and all my friends thought being in Scouts was gay. None of them would have thought of this. Well maybe a few of them, but they were military as well. As I continued my trek, I started singing quietly just to make it seem like I wasn't alone.

“Row row row your boat gently down the stream, merrily merrily, life is but a dream, aaand row row row your boat......”

After numerous repetitions and a few altered lyrics, I started to get closer to the tree I had camped out in the night before. I must have been around a hundred metres away when I heard the loudest laugh possible. Sounds like they found my plate. Easing my way to the side, I found a bush that gave me cover and a line of sight to the tree, I unslung the rifle and opened up the bi-pod before going prone and looking down the scope. At the bottom of the tree was Rarity, Applejack, Twilight, and Pinkie Pie. I guessed where Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash were.

They were all sat looking up at the tree, except for Pinkie, who turned in my direction and sat with her eyes closed. Shit, she knows where I am. Is she going to give my position away? Whilst I was thinking this, the pegasus ponies had flown back down, and I listened in on their conversation.

“So come on then Rainbow, what was so funny?”

Fluttershy then set my plate on the floor.

“You see girls, he may be dangerous, but he does have a caring heart after all.”

“Okay Fluttershy, I know it was wrong for me to panic. I don't know why he left this stuff behind, but we can at least look after it for him for now. Come on, lets get back to the library.”

Wait, they got my stuff? Fuck you Murphy, fuck you. At least I know where it's going, I'll get it after nightfall.

“um, can you give us a moment girls. We'll catch up okay?”

The rest just nodded and walked away

“Pinkie?”

“It's okay Fluttershy, I was just waiting for them to go. Look over there.”

Her hoof is pointing straight at me, why didn't she tell the others? Wait, are they waving at me? Okay, they're leaving now. I spoke in a whisper. “Thank you girls. We'll meet sometime, when we're both ready.” Standing up, I followed them at a discreet pace until I could make out the town down from the tree line. Looking around, I spotted a likely looking target, and started to climb it, hoping for a good vantage point.

“Okay, I've never done recon in real life, so lets see if those tac team games online line taught me anything. First, observe enemy routines and patrols. Second, exploit any weaknesses. Third, and most importantly, don't get caught.” I settled down on a large branch with gave me a viewpoint covering most of the town, plus an unobstructed view of the library. I watched as the door opened in a lavender aura, and Twilight trotted inside.

“Target acquired.”

I looked at my watch and gave a small groan. I had been there for five hours and I hadn't seen one patrol of the guards. Are they all doing the same, waiting for me to make an appearance? As I was thinking this I spotted some movement around the library. Looking down my scope, I saw Shining Armour hugging Twilight before cantering off in the direction of the train station. Okay, so they have been recalled, I wonder if they are leaving a small contingent behind. Coming out of the aim, I caught more movement around town hall. Zooming in on there, I caught a Unicorn guard raising the Equestrian flag. Yep, there are some left behind, and it looks like they're using town hall as barracks. I'll wait for nightfall.

Another three hours had passed and night finally came. I was a little distracted by the beauty of the night sky here. On Earth you'd have to go miles from any civilisation to just get a decent glimpse of the sky. The guards left behind had started patrolling at around sunset, and they went past my planned route to the library every forty five minutes or so. I climbed down from the tree and put the sniper rifle down against it. I wanted to be mobile, and that thing was heavy.

Crawling my way slowly across the grass, I unholstered the pistol and waited for the next patrol to go by. I didn't have long to wait and as soon as they rounded a corner I was up and in to the alley. Making my way slowly along it, I came to the other end. Checking the main road was clear, I sprinted to an alley on the other side. This went on for ten minutes before I came across an obstacle I had not seen from the tree. There was a six foot wall blocking the way, and this was the last alley before the library.

“Really? six foot? We had to take a eight foot one in basic with no help! This isn't even a challenge!” Stowing the pistol, I reached my hands on top on hoisted myself over. Turns out that was a bad idea, as my stab wound flared in pain and I fell off on to the other side. Laying there and catching my breath, I heard a door open behind me. “Who's there? If that's you again Pipsqueak, then I'll be sending a letter to Princess Luna! And your parents!” The door was slammed shut behind me and I let out a little laugh. So the little guy likes to get in trouble huh? And at least he has parents here. Too many fics have him as a runaway or orphan. Good to see reality isn't like that!

Easing myself up, I crept to the edge of the alley and checked to see if anypony was about. It was clear, and I was about to move when the library door opened. Out trotted Twilight followed by Spike. I slid in to the shadows as they came by.

“I said I was sorry Spike, but this creature made me forget about the meteor shower. I'll make it up to you with some nice gems tomorrow.”

“Okay then Twilight, you win this one!”

Meteor shower? Am I here before season one ends? If I am, I will have to stay here for a year. They're going to need some help with the Changelings. But wait, the others know of Shining Armour, so is it before or after the wedding? Satisfied I'd get my answer soon, and checking that the coast was clear, I darted to the door, and was surprised to find it unlocked. Well, it is a public library I suppose. Now where did she put my gear?

Remembering that Twilight performed her experiments in the basement, I started to look through the doorways to find some steps. As I opened one door, something flew out at me and landed on the table.

“Who?”

Well, I guess that answers that question. Knowing how clever this owl was I thought to get a answer to my other one. “Shining Armour?”

At this, Owlowiscious flew over to a mantelpiece, and pointed to a photograph frame. Walking over, I picked it up and had a good look. It housed a total of ten photographs, one of each of the Element Bearers, one of Shining Armour in his dress uniform, one of Princess Cadence in her wedding dress, one of the happy couple at the reception, but the largest one in the middle was of all of them, and there was a message at the bottom.

“'To Twilight and her friends, thank you for a wonderful day, Shining Armour and Princess Cadence'. Well, at least I don't have to worry about Changelings.....for now. Thank you for showing me this.”

Owlowiscious just shrugged and hopped back over to the table. Putting down the picture frame, I made my way in to the basement and grew slightly annoyed. “She just had to look at it didn't she?” My GSR was in pieces, but easily repairable. All she had done was remove the filters and PSM. I clicked it all back together and placed it on to check that it worked. But then I realised the seal wouldn't work properly as I hadn't shaved for over 24 hours. Feeling around my chin, I was quite surprised to find it still smooth. Okay this has to be a dream! There is always growth if I don't shave daily!

Stowing the GSR in it's bag, I considered grabbing my CBRN suit as well, but had a better, albeit cruel, idea instead. She is going to kill me when we finally meet!! Taking it back upstairs I grabbed the mop and broom, and two spare poles. I found some string in a drawer and tied them in to a general skeleton structure. After putting the suit on it, I rested it against the wall and felt something was missing. I then realised I still had my S10 on me, and my mouth tugged in to an evil grin. Removing it from it's bag, I placed in on the top most bit of wood, and pulled the hood up, placing my inner gloves on the ends of the “arms”

Stepping back to admire my work, I was quite pleased with myself. When they returned and switched on the lights, they'd probably have a heart attack. Spotting an unopened book, I went to read it and saw some interesting notes.

“It appears to have some kind of military training, but not of any kind I know of.”

“This “Lucky”, or “demon” as it told the Diamond Dogs, seems to be immune to magic. It broke out of my shield spell that is strong enough to hold Rainbow Dash.” Huh, I wonder if it's power drained when she wasn't concentrating, or if it really was that weak?

“It seems to know about our species, in particular that some pegasi do not like their hooves touched. However, there is no possible way it could have known one of those was Rainbow Dash.” Oh shit, they're going to want to know how I know! “It is possible it was just a lucky guess” Lol, “lucky” guess!

“We do not know why it will not show itself to us, but Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy have both been near it since last night, they even gave it breakfast. And the fact that it saved the CMC from some Diamond Dogs and not just returning them here, but providing first aid and making sure that they got to the hospital clearly shows a high set of morals. So why won't it, or rather “he” show himself?”

“Why won't I show myself? Lets see, she wants me to present myself to a magic user that is so immensely powerful, she uses paper that doubles as a flashbang!!! Gee, I wonder why I don't show myself!!!” Turning the next page, I saw that is was blank. “Mess with my stuff huh? Time to return the favour!”

I picked up a quill and dipped it in some ink, before thinking what to write. I had a sudden inspiration from something I had seen on My Little Brony months ago........

"But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die."

"I'd never given much thought to how I would die -- though I'd had reason enough in the last few months -- but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.

Having made it out of town with no encounters with the residents, I had made my way back to my observation point and had just picked up the sniper rifle when I heard the biggest scream ever. Of all time. I chuckled to myself as I started back to the castle to get some much needed rest.

Author's Note

Guess the book!!! I'll give you a clue, this is the picture I'm on about!!

And no, I have never read the book nor seen the films, and I don't plan to either.

I just want some f[buy some apples]g apples!!!

Judging by the sun, I awoke late the next morning, extremely hungry. There was a limit as to how many muffins I could eat, and even then it didn't dull my cravings, mainly for bacon. Standing up, I grabbed the M4 and made way outside, looking for something that had flesh on it. I didn't have to look far, as there were plenty of rabbits bouncing around. Strangely, none of them seemed bothered by me, so I chambered a round and waited. Just as one looked up to check it's surroundings, I sighted on its head and clicked the safety off, to which it turned its head towards the sound.

“Sorry little buddy, but I got to eat, and I need protein.” I fired the rifle and the result was instantaneous. Birds flew out of the trees, and the rabbits scattered, except for my target. There was no brain left to tell it to run. Heading back inside with some wood, I started a fire in the old throne room. For a pan, I had pulled off one of the engines smaller panels, and used some brackets to make a stand. Thinking that I'd need to get stronger, I started to do some push ups and sit ups whilst my breakfast cooked.

After eating, I looked around at my shelter, seeing if I could do anything to improve it. There were plenty of bricks around, so I started to lay the foundations of a wall in one of the corners. I need to some how make it sturdy, and without any cement I was unsure what to do....until I had a flash of memory from my childhood. Hundreds of individual pieces lay at my feet, and with no instructions, I began to piece them together. For added strength, I mad the walls twice as thick, and not only overlapped them lengthways, but inwards as well. Three hours later, and I had a table made out of Lego that my mother could sit on and it wouldn't break. Not bad for a seven year old!

Realising what I needed to do, I looked for fallen walls, ceilings, or anything that would suffice. After a few hours of gathering supplies, I took a break to eat some muffins and plan my building work. Once I was ready, I placed a brick along a wall eight foot away from a corner, and did the same on the other wall from the corner. Once they were in place, I started to lay the first line, but only to see where they met. Once that was done, I pulled some away and left a two foot gap for an entrance, and began building the wall.

By the time I was hungry again, I had a four foot high, two foot wide wall, and still had plenty of bricks left over. Sure, if something strong enough was to hit it, it would be over in a matter of seconds, but I had the distinct feeling that I was the first thing to live in here by choice for a long time. Stuffing a couple more muffins, I realised I need some fruit in my diet, and there was a small farm just past the woods that held the perfect solution. And the sun had just started going down.

By the time I reached my observation post (tree), the night sky was again shining brightly. I followed the tree line around the town and came across a white picket fence. Following along, the was a gap with a simple arch covering it. Hanging from the arch was a wooden plank with “Sweet Apple Acres” on it. Having found my destination, I entered and instead of making for the trees, I headed towards the barn, and the apple cellar.

Cracking open the door, I went to make my way down the steps, but I was met by a growling from the bottom. Looking down, stood there with her gave fixed on me, was Winona, which meant that somewhere around here was....

“What in tarnation are you growlin' at now girl?” I could hear her voice getting closer to the bottom of the stairway. “Nopony's comin' round this la......” As she trailed off, her eyes met mine and they went wide with fear before a colossal shout tore from her lungs.

"MACINTOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Panicking, I turned and ran for the exit just a the crimson farm pony darted out of the house and gave chase. I made it to the exit and hit the sign as I ran through. It had the desired effect and hit Mac square between the eyes, dazing him a little as he continued the chase, before finally flopping over. I hit the tree line and turned to see what had happened to my pursuer.

Applejack and Applebloom were standing next to him as he ran on his side not making any progress before jumping up and running in to the fence causing him to look round reminding me of a video I had laughed at a few times.

“Applebloom, get Big Mac back inside, and put an ice pack on 'is head.”

“Where you goin', sis?”

“Ah'm gonn get Twilight, see if she can find a way to put shield up so that creature can't got on t' the farm.”

I watched as Applebloom guided Mac back to the house and Applejack ran in to town. Making my way back along the tree line, I made it to where I could see the front door of the library just as Twilight and Spike ran out carrying a load of books. I checked my weapon to make sure the sensors were on, having this time deciding to bring the L85, due to its small design. Once satisfied they were working, I placed my GSR on and turned on the HUD suite. Those eggheads had done a really good job. It must have had some sort of low light filter in it as well, because I could make things out in the darkest of shadows. Hitting the sync button on both devices, I was rewarded both with text scrolling across my vision and a computer voice speaking in to my ear.

Integrated Weapon HUD System Online
Would you like me to run the tutorial program?

I wondered for a brief moment if this had a radio system in it. Surely if they had put the HUD in, they would have thought about that too. I could only think of one way to test my theory out. “Tutorial Program, where have I heard that before?” A quick vision played across my eyes. "....No, just load up the weapon system."

Weapon found.....processing
Weapon match....L85A2
Bringing aiming reticle online.....complete
Second Weapon detected
Would you like to sync this weapon as well?

“Yes, I would like to sync my other weapon.”

Please hit the sync button the second weapon

I did as it asked.

Weapon found......processing
Weapon match.....USP .45
Bringing aiming reticle online.....complete
Second weapon synced
Would you like to calibrate the motion sensors?

“Yes.”

Please stand in a area with a five metre clearance.

Moving out of the alley sounded like a bad idea, but there was nobody around at this time of night. Once I was there, I stood as still as possible. “In position.”

Calibrating motion sensor.....
…..
…..
…..
…..
Calibration complete
System is ready.

Error...GPS signal is not active
Would you like to run diagnosis?

“They put a GPS system in this as well? Huh, so much for that 'it's all science fiction' bullshit. No, don't run diagnosis, we're not in Kansas any more.”

Unknown location....last known location
51° 44' 54.61” N
1° 34' 32.78” W
Please insert new co-ordinates

“Sorry GLaDOS, we are no longer on Earth. We are no longer in Sol. I don't even know if we are in the same dimension as home.”

This units designation is not GlaDOS
This units designation is Integrated Weapon HUD System
Please insert new co-ordinates

“I don't have any new co-ordinates. Do you have mapping software?” I asked, hoping that this machine was actually what all the rumours flying around were about. All we had heard was that there was a new way to map non-hostile places without wasting fuel, or waiting for a satellite to be overhead.

Wait one....checking
…..
….
….
Mapping software confirmed
Would you like to start a new map?

“Yes, and have where I am now stood as zero-zero.”

Location being created.....
New Location confirmed
Current co-ordinates are
0° 00' 00.00”
0° 00' 00.00”
Is there anything I can help you with?

“No, just shut down, or go in to sleep mode, whatever it is you do when not needed.” There was a beep in my ear and the text disappeared, leaving me three things on display. A general point of aim, although unlike video games where it stayed in the centre, this moved with the rifle. If I pointed it away from my vision, the edge would tint red to show me what direction the barrel was pointed in. There was the motion tracker, with a range of thirty metres, and it had even mapped out the structures so I knew how far the walls were. The last thing on display was the battery meter, which was fully charged.

Time to start my research, and of course, a bit more trolling.

“Applejack, can you describe it to me?”

“Sure Twi. It was about six foot tall, and had quite a slim build. Ah'd said he was not one of the strongest of 'is kind. He jus' didn't seem to have the build. An' he was holding a different weapon this time. It looked like the first, but it had something else on top.”

“What did it do when you saw it?”

“He jus' stood there looking at me. Ah've never been so frightened in all my life Twi, that's when Ah shouted for Big Mac.”

“And that's when the creature ran off?”

“Yeah, by time I had made it t' the top o' the stairs, Mac was all ready heading out the gate, but the creature had hit our sign, which came back and hit Mac in the face, dazing 'im a little.”

“So, not only is it intelligent, it knows what or who to pick fight with. I'm getting the feeling that it has been here much longer then we thought, as when it jumped out of the hospital the other day, it seemed to be worried when it spotted the guards.”

“You think it thinks they were there for him?”

“It's a possibility, and one we can't rule out yet. The next batch of guards should be arriving on the next train, and they are due in around thirty minutes. I'll go meet them and bring a couple back here for the night. Did I tell you about last night?”

“No, Ah don't think ya did. What happened?”

“I.......think our friend paid a visit. When we got back from the meteor shower, I turned on the lights and I thought it was there. I wouldn't be surprised if you heard my scream. Anyway, that outfit we had taken had been placed across some poles to make it look like something was in there. There was also a mask like the one we discovered on top. And my research diary had extra writing in it. I didn't recognise the symbols, but the scary part is I could read it!! After checking the basement, the mask we had recovered was gone. I think it left the other one in its place.”

“Well, Twi, you were the one that said it was intelligent. Ah think it played a prank on you!”

“Yes, well it wasn't very funny. My reaction got the better of me. The builders are coming to fix the hole in the morning.”

Slamming the book down in frustration, I let out a sigh, I couldn't find anything towards inter-dimensional/universal portals and such. The book that had frustrated me was supposed to list every subject covered in the library, and it didn't help. Giving up on that line of thought, I reopened the book and decided to see what they knew of humans. I couldn't find anything under 'h' that I recognised, and closed the book again. I know what you're all thinking, “How can he read and understand them?”, I don't know. Just like I know that this book is not written in any language I know, but I can read it perfectly.

And it's freaking me out. Just where did that hole in the wall come from?

Flipping to 's', I had a bit more luck. 'Simian'- see Extinct Creatures volume 17.

“Extinct Creatures, huh? Let's see, Pinkie found the book on the Elements under 'e', so is there some sort of system here?” Getting up, I started at the nearest shelf to the right of the main door. I spotted a label on one shelf and checked it, seeing the letter 'b' on it. Moving to the right, I kept checking until I came across 'e'. A quick search of the shelves revealed the book I was after, and I cracked it open, looking through the contents.

“Simians can be defined in two ways. 'Apes', which have no tail, and 'Monkeys' which do have tails.” Okay, so they know about monkeys and apes, what else. “Scientists believe that another species evolved form them, as evidenced by the similar, and at the same time, different skeletons they have found. Whilst nearly identical to the simian creatures, they showed that what ever this creature was, it walked tall, and not hunched over like the other races. It has not been confirmed, but the scientists have dubbed it 'Simian-Erectus'.”

“Looks like I have my connection. These 'Simian-Erectus' sound like 'Homo-Erectus'. I think I'll leave a little note for my little friend.” Picking up the book I had wrote in the night before, I opened it to the last page I had seen. It had hastily scrawled writing next to my neat passage. “Looks like she found my note! Wonder what she put? 'The first passage holds some form of religious significance. I am not sure how, and I would love to ask it....him about it.' Heh, maybe later. What did you put for the second passage? 'The second passage is a bit more confusing. It sounds like he was full of life and then something bad happened, and now he knows his fate. To know the moment of ones death must be a blessing and a curse at the same time.' Oh Miss Sparkle, you have no idea how wrong you are!!!”

Picking up the quill again, I drew a flow charts of a sort. On the left I put 'Your world: Simians-Simian-Erectus-?' On the right was 'My world: Simians-Some other species-Homo-Erectus-Some more Species-Homo-Saipiens=ME!'

And at the bottom I put another well known reference in the centre.

Don't Panic
And don't forget you towel.

Looking around with an evil grin, I spotted my wonderful creation pushed to one side. Grabbing more string from the drawer, I rigged it so that when the door opened, inwards or outwards, my friend would drop down in front of the unsuspecting pony.......upside down. If it weren't for the fact it would start a fire, I'd have put two candles behind the masks for eyes.

Leaving the library, I was glad the new software was working, Using the back entrance as not to ruin my 'surprise', I immediately had several large red blips appear on the motion tracker. Getting my rifle ready, I poked my head out from behind the bins and froze. There was around forty guardsponies stood in the road talking. It was then that Twilight ran in to town and up to the one with the most feathers in his helmet.

“Lieutenant.....sorry I don't know your name yet, but the creature has been sighted over by Sweet Apple Acres. I know you've just arrived, but could you send a couple of guards over there or the night?”

A quick movement of his head and four guards took off in the direction of the farm. “Thank you. Now, my name is Twilight Sparkle, please allow to show you where you'll be staying whilst in Ponyville.”

I waited for them to disperse, half following Twilight, and the other half towards the train station. I waited till my motion sensor showed all clear and darted for the alley. Using my new tech, I managed to get out of town using the main roads and hiding from the patrols with ease.

I couldn't believe it. Sending the guards over there just because I wanted one fucking apple!!! I got my revenge on Twilight however, when she opened the door to the library.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH”

One image came to mind.

A nefarious plot, a Canterlot Clash.......and the fall

Over the next month I had settled in to a nice routine. I'd wake up around midday and go out to catch some meat, normally in the form of a rabbit. They never seemed to run, even as I would kill one of them each day. Man, Fluttershy is going to be pissed when she finds out. Whilst my breakfast was cooking, I'd carry on my exercises, getting to a point where two hundred press ups and two hundred sit ups felt like nothing, even having enough time left over to run up and down the hall. I had even managed to finish building my shelter.

It still wasn't cemented in, but it now reached the ceiling, and I had torn off one of the larger engine panels for the door. Every afternoon I'd head to my OP and watch the day to day life of Ponyville, seeing who did what, and more importantly, what time the guard started their patrols. I had found the clock early on, and only needed to adjust my watch by ten minutes, which was a little freaky. I continued to go in to the library at night to research things, mainly the local and national history. I had to use a different entrance each night, as Twilight was putting up spells on the ones I had used. It felt like she was testing my intelligence.

I'd always leave some sort of note in that book, and my friend in some new position. The screams died off after about a week, I'm guessing she was expecting this by now. Except for when it was in her bed!! The best scribble from her though was for my 'Don't forget you towel', and her thoughts were 'Is there going to be a flood, and how does he know?' That one made me laugh a bit. I had managed to get some apples as well, although avoiding that dog took time to master.

I had “acquired” some blankets and a couple of pillows to stay warm in my shelter, and also some unused window panes so that water could condense on them and I'd have fresh drinking water. It took me a while to realise that I was no longer in the Everfree Forest, but the Whitetail Woods instead. Whilst in my OP, I could hear a tremendous thundering heading my way, and I pulled out my pistol in case I needed to use it.

Turns out it was just the running of the leaves. The usual ponies we're at the front, Rainbow and Applejack competing as usual, just not as aggressive. Trotting, and bouncing, along at the back were Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. As they came past my tree, I froze hoping they wouldn't notice, but as they ran under, Pinkie gave a gasp as her mane and coat looked like she had entered a wind tunnel. I had no idea what this meant until they both looked up.

SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!

They both just smiled and carried on. I couldn't believe, they had looked right at me!!! But then I remembered that one was the Element of Kindness, the other of Laughter. They must have seen it as not nice to reveal me, and somehow it wouldn't make me smile. I had climbed down from my now barren tree once the last few stragglers had gone past, and looked for another hiding place. About a hundred metres down was a massive Evergreen, which would provide the perfect cover. Settling in, I waited for nightfall, and the librarian with OCD to leave with her assistant for the night. Knowing Pinkie Pie, there would be some sort of “Running of the Leaves” Party. I didn't know how right I was as I made my way in to town.......

“Ugh, why do I always eat so much cake?”

Twilight and Spike were walking back home from the party, with Spike holding his stomach. Twilight was gently swaying in the breeze, having had a bit more cider than usual. “I don know Spike, but be quiet in the morning! We've got an early shtart, as we're organising the Grand Galloping Gala tomorrow night.” Getting back home, she turned the light on and found the stick creature sat in a chair. Something was different about it this time, but she couldn't quite put her hoof on it.

Shrugging, she made her way over to her research diary, expecting to see some new research and some more cultural references from the creatures home. It was not what she found as she read the words out loud.

“Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide
No escape from reality
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor colt, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go
A little high, little low
Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me

Mama, just killed a stallion
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he's dead
Mama, life had just begun
But now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine
Body's aching all the time
Goodbye everypony - I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama, ooo -
I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all

I see a little silhouetto of a stallion
Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning - very very frightening me
Galileo, Galileo,
Galileo, Galileo,
Galileo Figaro - magnifico

But I'm just a poor colt and nopony loves me
He's just a poor colt from a poor family
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
Easy come easy go - will you let me go
Bismillah! No - we will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go - let him go
Bismillah! We will not let you go - let me go
Will not let you go - let me go (never)
Never let you go - let me go
Never let me go - ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no -
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me
for me
for me

So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh baby - can't do this to me baby
Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here

Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
Nothing really matters
Anypony can see
Nothing really matters - nothing really matters to me

Anyway the wind blows...”

As she finished reading the hairs on the back of her neck started to stand up. There was something eerie about those words, and it gave her a chill. Turning around she gave a slight gasp to see the stick creature was no longer sitting there. She relaxed, assuming that Spike had once again put it away, and was about to head off to bed something tapped her on the shoulder. She turned slowly and found herself looking in to the masked eyes of the creature, and her eyes went wide with fear.

“Boo”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH” Not thinking and just reacting, Twilight summoned her magic and shot a blast at the creature, sending it flying through the air and breaking the door on it's way out. Fearing that she had injured it, and not wishing to face it's retribution, she galloped to the door to offer her aid when her brain sputtered to a halt, it's reaction not being what she expected.

“Boo”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH” Seeing her horn start to glow, I knew what was about to happen, I just hoped it wouldn't have the same effect as on the wall. Not having time to move, the blast hit me square in the chest, sending me through the door and sliding along the ground for a good forty foot. I stood up and looked at the concerned mare in the door way.

“That......was freaking awesome!! We'll have do it again sometime!!!” I took off running as I felt a change in the heat around me. A quick glance back and the lavender mare was now white with a mane and tail of flames. I had time for one last thought before her voice caught up to me, causing me to run much faster. Congratulations. Your Twilight Sparkle has evolved in to a Rapidash!

“GET. BACK. HERE. NOW!!!!”

Having made it back to the forest, I had started on my journey 'home' when I noticed something different about the forest. There was too much light for this time of night. Turning off my low light filters, I looked for the source of the light, and finding it, crept forwards to see what was going on.

Getting closer, I started to hear voices. Rough voices. That couldn't talk properly. There was only one set of creatures I knew talked like that. I was thankful that I had checked out those crates entirely, as in the bottom I had found suppressors for the rifles and the pistol. Grabbing the pistol, I approached the only guard I could see. I don't know if he was a dumb as he looked or if he was just asleep. I'd never find out now. I put the barrel of my gun right up to his eye and pulled the trigger. He dropped like a sack of shit. Peering in to the clearing, I saw ten more Diamond Dogs, and listened in to their conversation.

“Everfree too dangerous now. Something killed scouts with no trouble. It ruined body as well.”
Huh, guess they discovered their friends.
“We can't go to pony town while pony princess in power. There is one thing we must do.”
Diamond Dogs making plans? This I got to hear.
“We go to pony capital. We catch pony princess. Force her to work for us.”
You really think you can catch Celestia? She and her sister are really the only ones I truly fear.
“What of Elements Of Harmony?”
You're fucked, that's what of the Elements of Harmony!
“Dogs be in position for big pony party. They will get pony princess and Elements at the same time! And then we can go to pony town and take as many ponies as needed.”
Shit! I got to get to Canterlot, but I can't leave these creeps alive.
“I have cart for getting some prissy ponies from pony capital as well.”
Fuck!!!!

Taking a closer look, I noticed that all of them had removed their armour and weapons. Must be some sort of trust thing. No weapons and armour means no fighting. Each other anyway. I had chosen to take the M4 that day, and I was grateful for it. Switching to auto, I took a few deep breaths before jumping out of cover. They looked at me in shock for a moment before they went to move. I just said a line from one of my favourite Sci-fi movies.

“How you doing? Hmm?”

A full magazine later and there were ten smoking smoking bodies on the ground. I needed more fire power. Starting to run at my new full speed, I made it to my rope in record time. Dumping my gear, I started the climb. Once back inside, I grabbed my backpack and started loading all the ammo I could carry. The side and top pockets were full of pistol mags, and the main pocket was full of M4 and Sniper mags. Picking up the Sniper, I made my way back down to the bottom of the cliff and collected the M4. Taking out the spent magazine, I put a fresh one in and racked a round. Time to catch a train......

It had been almost a full day. I had managed to sneak on to the train in the baggage compartment, and almost got caught at the few stops along the way when ponies got off. Making in to Canterlot in the early hours was a good thing, as there were few ponies about, just the milkman...stallion and the like. Finding a nice high building, I snuck my way to the top, and was rewarded with a good view of the castle gardens. Looking down, it appeared that the 'meet and greet' was going to take place outside this year, which was good for me, as I can't see through walls.

Early on in the afternoon, the Element Bearers had arrived to start setting up. I could see them conversing with Celestia and Shining Armour in the gardens, but there was no sign of Luna. I also had the feeling that I was being watched. No matter how many times I looked, I couldn't find anyone there. Shrugging, I went back to watching over the gardens.

“......so as I was saying, we found the bodies this morning when Pinkie Pie was going all crazy. We didn't know what had done it until Applebloom appeared having followed us. She told us that's what the Diamond Dogs looked like after 'Lucky' had dealt with them. They had placed the weapons and armour aside, which as you know means something big is going to happen. It is therefore my recommendation, as long as Shiny agrees, that we should increase security, for tonight at least.”

“Captain Armour, what do you think?”

“The truth, your highness? In light of this new information, I think we should cancel the Gala.” This earned a shocked gasp from Rarity, who was about to say just why they shouldn't do that when he continued. “But, it is too late now, so yes we should increase the Guard. I'll have unicorns on the wall, pegasi patrolling the skies, and the earth ponies patrolling the castle grounds. Do not worry, nothing will get past us.”

Little did he or anyone else know, that just under the ground ready to burst through, was a squad of five Diamond Dogs, patiently waiting to strike.

The evening came up quickly, with all the decorations being placed up, the tables being stocked, and the band had warmed up. It really was fascinating watching Octavia play the violin without magic, and I could've listened all night, but I had to keep focus.

As I heard a fanfare ring out, I put a round in to the chamber of the rifle. I could hear Celestia's voice, even at this distance.

“Fillies and Gentlecolts, I am pleased to welcome you to this years Grand Galloping Gala!”

As the stomping set in, I heard something thud behind me. Turning, I came face to face with a massive grey pegasus.......wearing golden armour. It let out a shrill whistle, and all of a sudden the rooftop was a hive of activity. Pegasi guards swooped down in droves, and unicorn guards winked in in flashes of lights. They had cut off my access to the stairwell, so I was trapped. As far as they knew anyway.

A brighter flash then the rest signalled the arrival of another guard, this one wearing purple and gold armour, with a deeper shade of blue feathers in his helmet. Captain Shining Armour.

“We knew you would try something today, after that mess you left near Ponyville. Lower you weapons and do not resit. The Princesses have some questions for you.”

Turning back to my sniper, I noticed Celestia about to introduce the guest of honour.

“And now fillies and gentlecolts, I present to you the guests of honour, The Bearers Of the Elements Of Harmony!!”

As they walked down the carpet amidst thunderous applause, I could see five separate mounds of earth pushing up. There they are!! “I'm sorry Captain, but I can not do that. Can you communicate with the ponies down there?”

“Yes I can, why?”

“Tell your sister to duck.”

At this he ran to the wall next to me and spotted what I had sighted on. A massive Diamond Dog was behind Celestia, and four others approaching the Element Bearers. I saw his eyes shut, and in the castle grounds the six ponies in the middle hit the floor. The Diamond Dog nearest to Twilight started to laugh loudly. What, you think they're cowering out of fear for you? I clicked the safety off and centred on his chest. There was a loud boom followed by some screams as the Dog was blown apart. I don't know what's in these bullets, but they don't stand a chance!! As the sniper was a bolt action, I cycled the bolt and ejected the spent casing, hitting Armour in the face with it. Three more shots and three more bodies hit the ground.

I swung the rifle to my last target and took my finger off the trigger. The last Dog had made it to Celestia and had its arm around her neck, using her as a shield from the guards.

“Stop!! I have pony princess!!! You do what I tell you now!!! Or things happen.”

“Armour, tell Celestia to close her eyes.”

“What? Why?”

“Just do it.”

Through my scope, I saw Celestia get a confused look before trusting her captain and closing her eyes. I placed my finger back on the trigger and started to take deep breaths. If I messed this shot up, I would be torn to pieces. The problem was I didn't have a clear shot. It would have to go though her wing.

“For what is worth, I'm sorry.” I pulled the trigger. Time seemed to slow, and I could actually follow the bullet through my scope. Time started to speed up again and there was a flash of blood followed by a scream from Celestia. More importantly, the Dog was now down. For good.

Taking advantage of the guards shock, I ran to the edge and jumped off, grabbing my rope in the process. I had to leave the sniper behind. Abseiling to the bottom, I undid the M4 from it, as I was using it as a weight to keep the rope from blowing around. Hearing screams just outside the alley I was in, I clicked the safety off and ran in to complete chaos.

There were two carts. A Diamond Dog stood guard at each one whilst the other twelve grabbed whatever pony that they could that was running around like a blue arse fly. Needing to get a clear shot, I removed the suppressor and fired at the first dog. They must have thought that once the Princess was secured, they wouldn't need armour. Little did they know what those five bangs were. The first dog dropped howling in pain, causing the ponies to scatter out of my way. I continued shooting until something impacted the backed of my head, making me loose my grip on the rifle and sending me to the ground.

Rolling over, there were three massive Diamond Dogs standing over me. I came to know these as 'berserker' class Dogs. The lead one lifted up its leg on brought it down on my visor. The glass cracked and I could fell liquid pouring in to my left eye. The HUD suite was down, but at this range I didn't need to aim. I pulled out the pistol and shot him in the face three times. Struggling to get back up, something impacted my abdomen, but I was too busy to be concerned. I looked to the next Berserker and fired four shots in to its face, dropping that one as well. My extra padding from the armour holder had been torn off in the melee.

Looking for the third one, I felt things slice in to my back as I spun, and something bit in to my right forearm causing me to drop the pistol. I fell to the floor with the third Berserker still attached and I thought of ways to get him off. With my left hand flailing around, it touched something I was not expecting. In the belt of the first Berserker was a knife. Stretching I managed to get a grip on it and pulled it free. Looking down at my attacker, I saw comprehension in his eyes as I shoved the knife between them. It let go and twitched once before it stopped moving.

Standing, which was a great difficulty, I picked up my pistol and turned to face the remaining Dogs. They had fled when I took down the second Berserker. Limping my way over to the carts, I approached the front to see who was driving. To my disgust, each cart had a unicorn chained to it. They must have been using their magic to move the carts. I approached the first one and told it to close its eyes. It did as I asked and I shot the lock off its collar, freeing it. I did the same to the other one.

Making my way to the back, I saw they were locked, but there was no key on either of the guards. The key holders must have fled with the rest. Shooting the locks off, I opened the doors to the carts. The ponies in both of them backed up even further, now fearing for their lives as well.

“You can come out now. You're safe.” As I made to back away, I heard a shout behind me. Coming in on the other side of the square was Shining Armour and a detachment of guards. I took off running. This was not my extraction route. I did not know what way to go.

“Stop!!”

My body was on the verge of giving out as I spotted some steps going up and headed up them. I was then running along one of the inner walls of the city. Coming near the end, I looked for a way down, I spotted one, but the guards had split up and intercepted me. Unicorns stood with their horns alight, the earth ponies were ready to charge, and the sky was covered in pegasi. On a rooftop behind them, I could just make out the princess of the night through my fading vision. It looked like she was smiling at me.

Shining Armour made his way to the front. “Just give up, there is nowhere else left to run.”

By chance I had made it around to the waterfall side, and I peeked over the edge. The drop must have been around two hundred foot, but people have dropped in to water from higher than that. Fair enough, they hadn't been through the wringer, but what the hell. I turned back to Armour and smiled. I stood as straight as I could and saluted him, then jumped backwards off the wall. A female voice followed after me.

“NO!!!!! AFTER HIM!!!!”

I could just make out shapes heading down to catch me, a rainbow blur in the centre. As the blackness finally crept over me, I had time for one last thought which caused me to smile as I heard the music. And it was rather ironic.

Author's Note

For the last link, you'll have to watch the adds then skip to 6:33 for the planned comment.
I spent an hour just looking for that one clip, and I couldn't find it anywhere.
If you know where I can find it, let me know and I'll change it. Cheers.

Edit: Whilst playing one of my games I realised where I got the "That was awesome" bit for being sent flying.
Can any of you work it out?

Nightmares and regaining consciousness

Ring ring. Hello. Ring ring. Hello. Ring ring. Hello. Ring ring. Hello. Ring ring. Hello.
Ring ring. YOU HAVE A BAD CONECTION!!!

Ring ring. Hello. Ring ring. Hello. “Hello?”

“You. Pub. Now.” Click.

“What?” Looking at my call history, it was my best mate ringing. All he had said was pub now. That's strange, there's only two pubs in town, and he doesn't even live here. I rang him back.

“'sup?”

“Dude, where exactly are you?”

“I'm in the pub, are you coming or what?”

“I can't mate, I'm on camp.”

“Yeah, I know. It's the fifteenth. You know, the weekend between our birthdays, the one where you got the sixteenth off and we all came up here to experience Oxford for the night?”

“Oh fuck, I forgot about that, what time is it?”

“It's twenty-thirty. We got a taxi booked for twenty two hundred. We're down in, hold on. HEY DICKLESS, WHAT'S THIS BAR CALLED? OK THANKS. We're in the Eagle. Get you arse down here.”

“Okay, let me just grab a quick shower, I'll be down in thirty.”

“No worries mate, I'll have a cold glass of Ruby Gold waiting for you.” Click.

Dragging my ass off my bed, I hit play on my stereo to get me in the mood for partying. I made my way over to the shower and turned it on whilst filling the sink with water. 'It may be our birthday weekend, and we may not give a shit, but we might as well look good for the ladies!' I went through my usual morning routine and had a shave followed by a shower, then dried myself off.

As I gathered my clothes for the evening, I started to dance to the current song playing. I stopped when I thought I heard a girl giggling. 'Okay, I don't have a girlfriend, so who the hell was that?' With the feeling of being watched, I pulled on a pair of my pulling boxers, you know the ones that say 'remember my name, you'll be screaming it later', a pair of socks and my freshly ironed jeans. 'Thank you camp laundry service!!!' Going to my wardrobe, I stopped to think about whether to go in a t shirt or shirt. Choosing a t shirt, I then had to decide what one to wear out. Going through my black ones, I came across four that I normally only wear when on my own.

"Fuck it they're my friends, they all ready know. If they can't accept it, tough shit! I'm secure in my masculinity!!"

Choosing my favourite of the four, I put it on followed by a jacket. I turned and looked in my mirror. "Looking good, just one last thing. Where's my hair gel?" Seeing it on my shelf, I picked it up and got closer to the mirror. It felt like there was something on the other side. As my jacket fell open, I seemed to pick up on a happiness radiating from it. Ignoring this, I hit the lights and made my way to the pub for some fun, drinking, and at the amount we drink, more than likely no sex!!

I could see a bright light. Was I dead?

"Doctor, his vitals are spiking. He's coming round!!"

"What? It's too early, give him another dose of sedative."

"Yes Doctor." Beep......Beep......Beep......Beep......"Vitals are lowering back down. He's loosing consciousness again."

"Good, let's hurry up in case they wear off again." No, not dead. But it feels like I will be soon. The darkness crept in once more.

I was falling head first. I don't how long I have been falling, and I don't know how long until I stop. The darkness crowded round me as I sped even further down. I looked 'up' and saw a light that was moving at the same speed as me. As I looked on in hope, I could hear voices echoing around me, my own mixed in with them.

“…...swear by Almighty God that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second, Her Heirs and Successors, and that I will, as in duty bound, honestly and faithfully defend Her Majesty, Her Heirs and Successors, in Person, Crown and Dignity against all enemies, and will observe and obey all orders of Her Majesty, Her Heirs and Successors, and of the Air Officers and Officers set over me. So Help me God.”

It repeated over on over until a voice broke out from the rest. My own voice.

“You have failed. You have quit you duty. You have broken your oath. Even your own parents were not there that day. To them you were and still are filth. Your friends will all abandon you. You will be alone for the rest of your days”

I tried to shut it out, but it just kept getting louder and louder. My father was away and my mother could not make it. They wanted to be there. I KNOW they did.

“You swore to protect your people. You failed as you are no longer there. Would you protect you country from you friends. From you family?”

As the voice said this light suddenly stopped and turned for me. I panicked at first, but then found I was in a room with a beating heart. I was in my uniform armed with a standard L85 and a full combat load. The voice spoke again. “That represents the heart of you nation. What will you protect it from?”

As it said this, the doors opened to reveal a street. It was empty at first, but then people started to appear at the far end. Enemies of my country, mixed with nationals. They all marched along, chanting the same thing.

“We want the heart. We want the heart. We want the heart. We want the heart.”

I could not fire on them, they had not attacked me yet. They had made it about half way when their features came in to view. They we no longer people. Their faces were distorted and their bodies twisted like some sort of sick experiment. It did not matter. I started firing round after round, but more just took the places of the ones I killed.

When they had made it three quarters of the way down, the building behind me started to twist out of the ground hundreds of feet in the air. This caused the creatures to start running towards it. I found some stairs that rotated around the outside and darted up them. I had to protect the heart of the nation. It was my duty. But I still had a feeling of being watched from the shadows.

I had reached the top of the tower. There was only one way up and the heart was on a plinth as far away as possible. I could hear the creatures getting nearer, and then the first one crested the steps. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it!!

“Simon? What are you doing?”

“We just want the heart. You wouldn't deny you friends would you?”

I looked to the other creatures that had come up behind him. Friends. Family. Ones I would give my life for in a heartbeat. And yet they were the ones after my charge. I aimed my rifle at him.

“You may be my friend, but I will do my duty. Stay where you are, all of you!”

He took another step forward. 'crack' He dropped to the floor no longer moving. This didn't deter any of the others, and I kept firing. My friends and family were down. I was out of ammo. The rest of the creatures made the final step and approached slowly. I threw my weapon at them in frustration and despair. There was only one way to make sure they didn't get the heart.

I picked it up and walked to the edge.

“I have done my duty.” I jumped.

As I fell, I got a feeling of helplessness and despair from another, and I heard a female voice call after me.

"NO!!!!! AFTER HIM!!!!”

Beep......

Ugh, what's that noise?And what smells like disinfectant? Opening my eyes, I was rewarded with only half of my vision. Reaching up gently, I felt a bandage over my left eye. Looking down at my body, I noticed more bandages around my midsection, and around my right forearm. Okay, two options here. The last month was real, and that fight in Canterlot happened. Or, more than likely, that blast put me in a coma, and that was my brains fucked up way of dealing with it.

Looking around for a page nurse button, I couldn't see anything of the sort. Deciding that sitting around wasn't going to do me any good, I swung my legs over the edge and stood up stretching slowly. I then noticed it was a little chilly in the room, and for a good reason. This was definitely not an earth hospital.

“...so, as I said your majesty, we do not know when, or even if he will awaken, as we do not know much about his species. Perhaps you could enter his dreams and see why he remains asleep?”

The comment caught Princess Luna off guard, as she still had not worked up the courage to return, and she was about to reply when a shout interrupted her.

“Where the fuck are my clothes?”

There was a blur of motion as the guards outside the creatures door charged in, horns alight and spears ready for action in case the creature tried anything. Instead it continued to speak.

“Okay, so.....not a dream. May I ask one of you fine stallions what happened to my clothes?”

The guards just stared at me in a mix of what looked like awe, shock and fear. I suppose they thought that walking around in the state I was in was not a good thing. I was about to ask them again when a voice from behind me started to speak.

“Your clothes were caked in mud and blood, had numerous tears in them, and were not fit to clean the floors with. We had them incinerated.”

Turning around, I expected to come face to face with a nurse or orderly, but what greeted me was something else entirely. Standing just a little shorter than me, she had a long horn and large wings. The crown and breast plate we emblazoned with purple gems, her soft violet eyes radiated a kindness that has not been seen on our world for generations and her voice was full of concern and gentleness. Princess Celestia. Now, I'm sure most of you would do the right thing, and be all courteous and shit. Me? Nope. Don't forget I shot her!

It must've been a pretty funny sight, a half-mummified naked human tearing out of the door and charging past a shocked Princess Luna screaming like a little girl. I didn't care. I just wanted to get somewhere safe. Somewhere not.....here.

Seeing the sign saying “Exit”, I changed my direction and was rewarded with wide open doors leading to a corridor. Darting out of it, I became aware that even though this was the same building, where I had just been was the medical wing, and I now found myself running around the corridors of Canterlot Castle.

Hearing hoofsteps in front of me, I tried the nearest door, which thankfully was unlocked. Slipping inside, I was a little surprised to see where I had ended up. There were three beds in here, too small for adults, and on each one was a set of saddle bags. It was then that the previous days memories came back to me, and I realised this was the CMC's guest room. Grabbing a towel for decency, I cracked the door open to see if the coast was clear.

It was, so I started to creep along the corridor, hoping to find either the exit or my gear. Trying another door, I found some of the guards equipment. Choosing one of their spears, I now had a way of defending myself. As I continued to stalk along, I could here what sounded like a debate going on. I found a balcony overlooking the main court hall and could see a whole battalion of guards read to go on command.

“But Princess, we know that it's dangerous, and it is now loose in the castle. What if he decides to attack you again?”

“Come now Captain Armour, are you not the one, after you confronted him, that said he saved the lives of not just myself , but your sister and her friends as well?”

“That may be true your highness, but right now it is frightened in a unknown location. That would make anything dangerous.”

As I waited for the rebuttal, I could feel like something was watching me. Turning around slowly, I came face to face with a massive ball of candy floss that had big blue eyes and a smile that gave the Cheshire Cat a run for it's money.

“Hi!”

“Aaaaaah”

As I started screaming, I moved backwards, forgetting where I was. I suddenly felt a loss of weight as I backed over the the railing and started to fall. “FUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKK!!” When I got near the bottom, I landed on something soft and bony. Opening my eye, I looked below me, and there sprawled out on the floor, with me on top of her, was Celestia. Again. How long had I been wandering the castle? And where the fuck is that towel?

My thoughts came to an end as I heard metal scraping the floor and saw lots of lights igniting. Grabbing the spear, I stood and turned slowly to greet my opponents. There were so many of them, not even a Gatling Gun could have helped me here. I had never used a spear before, but I tried to take to the best fighting stance I could. A few of the guards backed up a bit, but even more stepped forward, with Armour leading the pack. “Lower the spear and you shall not come to harm, I give you my word.”

I just grunted in reply, ready to fight when the gentle voice again sounded from behind me. “Everypony, lower your weapons.” She got some concerned looks from the guards, but they did as as she said. She then stood and and started towards me. Now I know it's stupid to point a weapon a nigh immortal being, but I was running purely on adrenaline, and that is when she spoke to me again. “It seems that you have my soldiers a little worried. Perhaps you could stop pointing that at me. You may continue to hold it if it makes you feel safe.”

There was just something reassuring about her voice, and I pulled the spear back to hold it across my chest. Just then there was a commotion near the door as three fillies pushed the guards out of the way and darted up to me. Applebloom and Sweetie Belle looked fine, and Scootaloo's wing was still splinted, but other than that she was okay. Until she started to shout at me.

“And just where the hay have you been mister? We came to check up on you and get told you ran away. We have spent the past three hours looking over the castle for you” I was wandering around for three hours? “Now, you are going to put down that spear and follow us back to the infirmary, where we can get a better look at your wounds.”

As she finished up my head started swimming, and I started to feel quite nauseas. Princess Celestia then approached and started talking again. “Please do as they ask, I would hate to see you in any worse condition that you are in now.” The nausea started to get worse, and I didn't even have time to look for a plant pot.........

That was not the best way to make a first impression on the ruler of this land, I wonder how long it'll take her to clean her coat and mane. That was the last thing to go through my head as the pain caught up and the adrenaline tapered off.

The ponies gathered could not believe it. At first it had fallen screaming something, landed on their princess, wielded a weapon against all of them, and then threw up on her highness. As she just stared blankly at it, the creature teetered back and forth, before it said something none of them were expecting.

“Ow.”

It then fainted, dropping the spear and hitting the ground like a rock. Celestia had herself a little laugh before she started to issue orders. “Captain Armour, please return him to his hospital room, and have guards posted inside and outside at all times. Then fetch me the cooking staff, including the Griffon chef for when their ambassador is here. I have a feeling that his species eats meat.”

“Yes, your highness.”

She turned to the waiting fillies. “You three go with him, and make sure he is comfortable. Oh, and get the castle tailor to make some coverings for him. He seemed rather upset we had taken his clothes.”

“There will be no need for that, your highness.” As she turned, the Element Bearers entered the hall, albeit with a reluctant Pinkie Pie. “When your sister entered his dreams on the first day he was here, she said that his clothes when with his friends and family were quite different to what she called his 'Uniform'. I have therefore taken the liberty to make these items for him, and they can be delivered at a time of your choosing. It is a shame she refuses to go back, there must be many wonderful things in his mind!!!”

“Thank you Rarity, I'm sure they will be much appreciated. And I will be speaking to Luna about this soon.” Rarity gave a graceful bow as Celestia turned her attention to another. “Now, as for you Miss Pie......”

Interlude: Back home.

It was a usual Spring day in London. That is to say, it was pissing down. Looking at the address written, he still couldn't believe it. He had been invited to the main building of the military. This was where all the top decisions were made. He approached the front desk and the young officer sat behind it.

“Afternoon love, I'm here for some sort of appointment. I don't know who with or what it's about. I just got the letter sent to me.”

“Okay sir, if I could just see the letter? Thank you.” As the officer looked over the letter, she started typing on her terminal. “Okay, if I could see two forms of ID please, something like a MOD ID card, driving license, or passport.”

“I'm no longer military ma'am, so here's my driving license and passport.”

“Thank you, I'll just be one moment.” Standing, the young officer walked away from the reception desk and past two armed guards, passing in to a room with “restricted” above the door. Looking around awkwardly, he spotted some seats nearby and went to sit down.

After ten minutes of waiting, the officer returned with two more armed guards. She handed him back his documents and spoke. “Please follow these gentleman, they will make sure you arrive at you destination.” Nodding, he stood up and followed the guards. After half an hour of walking, he was starting to get nervous, but the guards just stopped at a wall. One of them reached up and hit a button hidden in the window frame, and a buzzer followed.

“Yes?”

“He's here sir.”

“Very well.” There was the sound of machinery as the inner wall slid away, revealing as secret briefing facility. “Thank you gentlemen, you can go now.”

He just stood there, staring at the new room that appeared out of nowhere, until a voice brought him back to reality.

“Thank you for coming. We have a situation and we need your help.”

“You do know I'm no longer military right? That I can just say go fuck yourself and walk away?”

“Yes, we are well are of that. Please, have a seat.” He did as asked and sat facing more brass then he had ever seen in his life. “Now, we have a few questions for you, please answer as truthfully as you can. First question, when was the last time you spoke to one SAC Luckes?”

“About three months ago.”

“And what did you speak about?”

“What we were doing for our birthdays this year. We are only a week apart, and we were going to go out in Oxford on the weekend between them with some friends.”

“Are you aware of the events that happened on the third of February this year”

“To which event are you referring?”

“The event that took place where SAC Luckes is stationed?”

“I know of an explosion, and that you lost some prototype gear........and that you never recovered his body.”

“Precisely. We can not even locate the emergency transponder that is in one of those bits of kit. The force of the blast encountered was not enough to destroy it, so it still should have sent a signal. We haven't even gotten wind of it on our satellites.”

“So......what are you saying?”

“It is the belief, and theory, of some of those aware of the full event, that SAC Luckes isn't dead. How do you fell about that?”

“Show me a body and then I'll believe you. Until then, he is still alive.”

“Excellent. We have a mission for you if you decided to go through with it. You can even pick your own team. If you agree now, you will get full disclosure of the current theory, and it currently has eighty five percent support from those investigating. What do you say?”

“Are you asking me.......if I want to track down my missing friend who, by the sounds of it, you no longer believe is on this planet? You're crazy, all of you.”

“Perhaps we can do something else to persuade you.” One of the officers leant forward and hit the intercom. “Dr, bring in artefact 'alpha'.”

“Right away sir.”

A door opened behind them and a woman in a lab coat came in carrying a case with her. Setting it down on the desk, she nodded to the brass and walked away.

“When we looked over the area of the incident, we found several......items that were not there before hand. We have subjected these items to tests. Spectroscopic analysis came back with no results, they are made from materials not found on this planet. Carbon dating puts them at nearly a thousand years old. We have searched for the markings throughout history and came up blank. There must be a reason as to why he got taken and not someone else. We were wondering, and hoping, you may be able to tell us what it is. Open it.”

Reaching his hand forward tentatively, he opened the catches and flung the lid back. Sitting in the foam was six pieces of bluish grey armour. Four were nearly identical, with two being slightly smaller. They all had an elegant design to to them, with shield like shin guards on them. The biggest piece looked like a chest plate, and it had a lighter blue symbol of a moon on it. He reached in and pulled out the last piece, holding it in front of him. It was a helmet, but it had two holes on the side, and a hole in the middle.

“This can't be possible.” He whispered under his breath.

A new officer, one who was hiding in the shadows, spoke up. “What's that son? Do you know what this is?"

“Yes sir, I do. What you have here is a set of armour meant for a pony. Specifically Nightmare Moon. I think I know why he was taken, and no one else was.”

“And why is that?”

He just sighed and lowered his head. Man, I hope that pink one can't actually get here, because I'm about to break one of her most sacred vows...

“Well son, we are waiting.......”

“SAC Luckes.....is a brony.” The woman that was still waiting ran out the door and didn't close it properly. They could hear frantic typing on a keyboard.

“Ha!! I knew it. You all said I was crazy, but I won the pool!!! And at those odds, you are all going to be busy for a while!!!” They all looked up as she came back in the room beaming, before she noticed she was being watched, and offered a sheepish smile. “Sorry about that, please carry on.”

“So then, any questions?”

“Yeah, just one.” He picked up the chest piece and stared at the moon symbol. “When do I start?”

The officer from the shadows replied. “Whenever you are ready.” He made to leave when the voice spoke again. “Oh, and one last thing.” He slid a package across the table. Upon opening, it revealed rank slides with one thick gold bar, two thin ones, and another thin one looping over itself.

“Congratulations, Admiral.”

Author's Note

I've hit a wall with where to go next. This was always my intention, but other humans were just going to turn up out of the blue. At least now I have a reason for it, just as they had a reason for picking his friend for the job, instead of someone more....qualified. Don't worry, they're not going to turn up any time soon, but the will be occasional flashes to see what is going on.

I go on shift in around and a hour and half, and I like hearing from my (somewhat limited) audience, so if there is anything you want to see happen, the please feel free to ask. Oh, and you see there's is no romance tag up there? There's a reason for that. I may read them, but I sure a fuck can't write them!!! It may have something to do with the fact i haven't experienced it myself for....hold on.....2004...9 years!! Plus, there are aspects about the characters that I love, not the ponies themselves, so we won't be seeing any of that

Comfort, and a new job, and a apology.

“um, I'd like to go with them your highness.” The voice from the usually timid mare attracted everyponies attention as she spoke up. “That is, if you don't mind.....”

“Fluttershy dear, I have told you before, call me Celestia. And I think it would be best for you all to be nearby when he awakens.” At this, the sniffling pink mare beside her started to perk up. “Now remember Mrs Pie, when he awakens, you are to apologise, and then leave. We do not want him attempting to right what he may perceive as a wrong doing.”

“But I.....hurt.....didn't mean to.....an accident....”

“It's okay, I'm sure he is not the type to hold a grudge. Now go, wait in the infirmary for now.” They all made to leave when Celestia spoke again. “Twilight, can you stay and talk with me for a while?”

“Of course Princess.” Turning to the others, she nodded and cantered over to a table off to the side, joined by Celestia.

“Now, I know you have had 'encounters' with this creature, and I wish to know what you have learnt so far.”

Pulling out her research diary, she began from the first day. “At first we were unsure of what he was, and I had a suspicion that he was from some form of military. After recent events, I have come to the conclusion that he is, and a highly trained one at that. The fact they he randomly showed up and saved three young fillies, before getting them home, seems to indicate a high level of morals. Especially as he was injured himself. These morals, however, seem flexible. Which reminds me, how is your wing?"

“My wing will heal Twilight, what ever that was just passed through the fat, missing the muscles or anything vital. Please continue.”

“Very well. I was a little concerned that he managed to break out of my shield spell, especially as the one I used is strong enough to contain Big Mac. Remind me to tell you about that later, you'll love it. Then when he ran away and Rainbow chased him, he showed an in depth knowledge of our species, and the fact that a number of pegasi have sensitive hooves. But there is no way he could've known that Rainbow was one of these, so I think that was just luck on his part.”

“It would seem so, but we must be sure to ask him about it at some point. What else?”

“The next day, he seemed to be hungry, so he went to Sweet Apple Acres. Again, we'll have to ask him how he knew about the farm. Anyway, he went to go in to the cellar, but Winona barked at him causing Applejack to come over. Upon seeing him, she called for Big Mac, and he ran away. He managed to daze Mac. He had snuck in to the library the night before, and in this book, he had wrote down what I believe to be something of religious significance, and something else.”

She took a deep breath before continuing, sure that even this revelation would shock Celestia. “I headed down to Sweet Apple Acres to talk to Applejack about what happened, and he must have been watching, as when I returned my research diary had been opened again, and there was a book about extinct creatures open. In my diary was a flow chart of creatures from Equestria, charting the Simian era, ending with the debatable Simian-Erectus. Next to it was another chart, I believe from his world. They have simian ancestors as well, but his species split along the lines and they evolved in to, what was it again? Ah yes, 'homo-saipiens', or 'humans' for short. He also put another reference to his culture at the bottom, saying 'Don't Panic' and 'Don't forget your towel'.”

If it did shock her, Celestia didn't show it. “It would seem he was trying to distract you from following his research with these writings.”

“No, I believe they hold some meaning to him, plus he distracted me in.......other ways.”

There were three people sat around the circular table in the secure briefing facility waiting to find out why they had been summoned. They were junior ranks, so when a Admiral requests your presence, you didn't say no. Two of them had met during training, and one knew the other through a mutual friend. They had all introduced themselves, and found out that none of them knew what was going on.

The door-wall slid open, and the guards came to attention. “Room sit up!” All other military personnel in the room came to attention as well as the Admiral walked in.

“Be seated.” As he said this, the door slid shut and a light shined in the centre of the room. “I suppose you three are wondering why you are here. The short end of it is you have been chosen to go on a rescue mission with the intent of finding SAC Luckes.” There were gasps around the table as he let the name sink in. “Now you are probably wondering why two engineers and a driver have been selected, and not someone more.....qualified. The reason for this is due to the nature of where we are going.” He leaned forward in to the light so that they could see his face.

“Simon?”

“That's Admiral or sir to you, airman.” He knew with him present there were going to be lots of questions.

“Sorry sir.”

“Now on to the matter at hand. We all know Alec was near an explosion, but we do not know what type. I have been informed that some experimental equipment disappeared as well, to which it has an emergency transponder on it to signal our satellites. In the past seven days, we have completed as many sweeps as possible, and found nothing. We even asked the Americans, and the Russians, to look for the signal. They found nothing.”

One of the other two spoke up. “So.........are you saying he's on another planet sir?”

“Yes, we believe he is. And we know which planet, we're just still trying to work out how to get there. There is also another reason, that out of all his friends, you three were chosen. You, as well as I, know something about him that most others don't.” The admiral hit a intercom on his side of the table. “Dr, artefact 'alpha', if you would.”

“Yes sir.”

“Twilight Sparkle, did he hurt you?”

“No, he didn't hurt me, he just gave me a few frights. When we went to where he had stayed the first night, we found a similar outfit to his clothes, but they were also different. When I returned home after his first 'research trip', he had tied some poles together, put a mask on it and left against the wall.” Twilight looked at the floor before muttering. “The builders fixed the hole the next day.”

There was a snort from across the table and Twilight whipped her head up to find Celestia trying to stifle her giggles. Twilight just shook her head and continued. “Anyway, the second night he did the same, but this time he rigged it so that when I opened the library door, it dropped down in front of me....upside down.”

At this Celestia lost all self control and burst out laughing. She tried to speak between breaths. “My....he....sounds...like quite....the pranker.”

Twilight just gave her a flat look as she finished up. “I'm glad you find my discomfort funny. Anyway, this continued for the next month, and it grew easier to deal with, except when he put it in my bed.” This earned another snicker from across the table, but she ignored it. “I got my revenge however, just before the recent incident. It was after Pinkie's Running of the Leaves party and I had just got back to the library. The thing he had made was sitting in a chair, and it looked different but I ignored it for the time being.”

She took a few deep breaths before continuing, having never been in 'lecture mode' for so long. “Turning to the book, I was expecting to see more research but instead there was what I believe to be a song from his world, with a few words changed to fit here. Turning around, the thing had been removed and I thought Spike had done it. I was about to head to bed when something tapped me on the shoulder. Turning around I saw his eyes for the first time and I understood why Applejack said she was scared. It just stared at me before it said 'Boo', at which point I screamed....and blasted it out of the library. Hoping he wasn't injured, I ran outside just as he was getting up. He said some about it 'being awesome' and 'we have to do it again' before he ran off. Everything else that has happened you all ready know.”

“I see. I must go and have a wash now. Thank you Twilight, go join your friends.” With this they both got up and headed to different ends of the hall.

As they approached the hospital wing, Pinkie Pie was getting increasingly nervous. “What if attacks me? What if he tries to eat me? What if hmmmm!!??” A yellow hoof was slapped over her muzzle and the owners voice calmed her down.

“Pinkie, I'm sure he will accept your apology. It may just take some time for his species. Until then, stop worrying, you'll only make yourself ill, and then who would throw his 'you don't have to hide anymore' party?”

At this Pinkie perked up and nodded, catching up with the others who waited just outside his door. The guards took notice of the gathered ponies and placed their wings across the doors. “We're sorry, but no visitors at this time. He is having his dressings changed. You may wait over there.” A shake of his head and they saw a seating area, resigning themselves for the right time.

I was drifting in and out of consciousness, I could hear and feel others around me. It was like swimming on my back with my ears underwater. I could hear the voices but I couldn't comprehend them. The next time I opened my eyes, I had my full vision again, although blurred, and it was filled with orange and purple at the time.

A light shined in my left eye to check its reactions, and then I head the voice speak. “Eyesight appears to have not been damaged. It may take time to adjust. He's got a wicked scar though.” Scootaloo? Since when was she a nurse? She's only a filly. I then heard another voice, older and matronly.

“Very good. Now once Sweetie Belle has done his arm, and Applebloom his leg, we'll prop him up and do the dressings on his torso.” My leg? How did that get inj......oh, that's what hurt after falling off the balcony. Dammit Pinkie.

I continued to watch from my trance like state before a voice drew my attention. “Nurse Openheart, his eyes haven't shut like usual. I think he's awake.”

I could hear the voices but I couldn't respond. The colourful blurs then got smaller and I heard the door open and shut. Looking towards the sound I could see a white and gold blur, and a grey and gold blur. So, guards inside the room now? What did I do? I heard the door open again and could make out six blurs. I could see yellow, orange, blue, purple, white, and pink.

Being in a delirious state, my instincts told me to get away from the pink one, but as I couldn't move just yet, I only succeeded in flailing my arms at the blur. The yellow one got closer and it seemed to calm me, but as soon as it moved again my body started to panic upon seeing pink. Slowly, the colours got smaller as they disappeared one by one until I could just make out a tint of yellow. Pushing myself, I managed to speak before I slipped under again.

“Don't.....go. Your....presence....is......calming.”

The yellow blur got bigger until the only thing fighting it was the blackness, but that eventually won.

“Um, sir?”

“Yes?”

“Just what the hell is this? I recognise it, but it can't be. It's not possible.”

“I know. But let me ask you this. How long would it take to get to Mars?”

“I think it's around six months. Why?”

“We can get there in approximatively thirty two hours.”

“Sir, that's bullshit. Nothing we have can travel that fast. That's going at....”

“Two thousand, five hundred and seventy times the speed of sound. Yes, we worked that out.”

“But how?”

“New technology. Every member of this team, other than ourselves, were investigating the incident. Even though they found nothing, they all came away with ideas from......somewhere, but they didn't make sense until they got together to discuss them. You are about to see one such example.”

As the admiral said this, the light shining down seemed to harden, and they found themselves looking at holographic schematics for.......something. The admiral continued talking. “We have colour coded them so they are easier to identify. The black one is the main shell, or body if you like. The orange is a gravity manipulation system. The green is a life support system. The red is a engine system, quite capable of reaching those speeds. At predicted maximum output, we believe it could achieve three thousand times the speed of sound. The blue is a weapon system, which we have installed, but not are activating just yet.”

“Sir, these don't make any sense what so ever, I can see they have multiple layers, but still...they are just a fucking mess!”

“We thought you may say that, so watch what happens when I place them over each other.” The images blended together in to a way that made much more sense, and the scale of what they were seeing finally dawned on them.

“Sir, is that a....”

“Yes, it is a space ship. We don't know what to call it yet, but it is ready and fully tested.” He looked round at the others seated there, no doubt in his mind he had made the right choice. “All it needs is a crew.”

Comprehension finally dawned on them as they gave the admiral their full attention.

"Sir, I think I have a name for it. Giving where we are supposedly going, and who to get, I suggest we call it after his favourite."

"This is your last chance to back out. Are you all on board?" He received three nods. "Very well. Welcome to the United Kingdom Space Command. Now what do you suggest we call the UKSC-001?"

"I was thinking.......the UKSC Princess Luna."

It was dark when I awoke. I knew I was somewhere different due to the fact the bed didn't feel like a plank of wood. Gently easing myself up, I stretched out the tautness that had taken up residence in my muscles. As I stood I heard a soft snore, and searching for the source I found Fluttershy sleeping on a couch in the room. Getting a better look, I concluded that this was one of the guest rooms in the castle, and after my request Fluttershy had stayed with me.

She must have stayed till she was exhausted. I grabbed a blanket and placed it on her to keep her warm, realising who had done the same for me recently. Spotting what looked like clothes, I walked over to the side and was pleased to see underwear, jeans and a t shirt. There was even a pair of trainers on the floor. After getting dressed, I walked over to the door and opened it, expected to come face to face with some guards, but the corridor was deserted. Spying what looked like a observation platform higher up, I made my way towards the tower.

Having arrived at the top of the stairs, I found it was not just an observation platform, but being the highest tower in the castle, was also a observatory. I lost track of how long I was gazing at the amazing sky above me and the splendour of the city that sprawled out below me. I was snapped out of my trance by the door opening, and with it being the only entrance, I darted behind a curtain as I heard two ponies enter.

“Thank you for speaking with me Twilight Sparkle. I did not wish to rouse my sister from her slumber.” I've heard that voice before, but where?

“Luna, please just Twilight. And I'd take time from anything for a friend. Now what's troubling you?” Ah.

“When our 'guest' first arrived, I went in to his dreams to find out more about him. Even though he was successful in rescuing the fillies, the deaths he caused still haunted him. Without my intervention, I....I.....do not know if he would be here today.”

“But that means you helped him. Why would that trouble you?”

“After recent events, I went back in to see if I could find why he jumped instead of just giving in. The first one went as said, he enjoyed a good night with friends, and he seemed happy. I still do not know why he had clothing with my likeness on it.” Ohhh shit. That's going to be a tough one to explain. “For the next few weeks his dreams grew progressively darker.” Wait, weeks? How long was I out? ”When he came round in the follow up surgery, I hoped that he had managed to banish his demons, but when he did not reawaken, I once again entered his dreams. The only time there seemed like there was hope was when he could see the night sky.”

Being watched from behind the mirror, the female giggling, the voice calling for me when I jumped....it was all her!

“I....I can not describe the nightmare he was forced through, but with his actions he showed me how far he would go to do his duty. Do you know why he didn't stop after saving you on the garden?” Twilight looked at her and shook her head. “I believe it is because in his heart he heard that there were others needing his help. As for why he ran, you yourself saw the injuries he had sustained. He was likely not thinking straight. As for not giving in, I believe it was because he believed he still had a duty to do, and we were preventing him from it. That is why I think.......we caused the nightmares. And why we are not deserving of such a protector.”

I could hear what sounded like sniffing before I came out from behind the curtain. Twilight drew in her breath as I approached Luna. She did not release it, whether from the fact I was there or that I was once again clothed I didn't know. It did not matter.

I put my hand on Luna's cheek and turned her to look me in the eye. Hers went wide in fear until I spoke as softly as I could. “The reason I have hope at night is even though the sun brings us warmth, the night carries all our hopes and dreams, and there is a beauty and peace that not even the softest of light can ever pierce.” Her reaction was not what I was expecting.

She threw her forelegs around me and buried her head in to my shoulder whilst crying her eyes out. I caught the faintest of a whisper from her.

“I'm sorry.”

Author's Note

Boom! Have some feels!! Did I do it right?
So to offset that have something I found hilarious. Why didn't I get Skyrim on the PC?

Anyway, I had so much more planned for this one, but at 3400 words, I thought to break it down on to two chapters.
Looking for the next one some time later. For now, I'm off to get me Dominos!
Oh, and if anyone wants to see the maths I used just ask!

Meeting Equestria's biggest fucktard.

I finally pulled away from Luna, although she seemed reluctant to let go, and I looked her in the eyes. “I will not say I forgive you, for you have done no wrong. It is me who should be apologising, for allowing you to see such events.” I suddenly had trouble breathing as she squeezed hard for a moment before letting go fully.

“Now, if you don't mind ladies, could you possibly show me back to my room? I'm kind of lost.” As I said this, the door burst open and a flurry of guards rushed in. Seeing me nearby and a crying princess could not look good. Fortunately, I had a witness.

“Calm down gentlecolts, we were just having an emotional discussion. We'll make sure he gets back to his room.” The guards just looked at Luna, who nodded, and then swept out of the room and back to their posts.

“Well then, shall...” I had just started speaking when something entered the room. Something so terrifying I found myself wanting to face down the guards. Naked.

“AND JUST WHERE THE BUCKING HAY HAVE YOU BEEN MISTER? YOU ASK ME TO STAY WITH YOU AND THEN WHEN I WAKE UP YOU HAVE GONE AND LEFT!!!! WELL WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?? AND STOP HIDING BEHIND PRIncess Luna. Oh dear.”

Peering fearfully around my shield at the suddenly calm yellow mare, I allowed a moment to calm down myself before explaining things. “When I woke up you were asleep, and I couldn't bring myself to disturb you, you looked too adorable. I just wanted a walk, and I saw this tower from the corridor. I was just looking for a view of the city, and when I got here I had a wonderful view of the beautiful night sky as well.”

Now, back home I may not have been the best smooth talker around. In fact I was probably the worst, but I got the impression that not one, but two mares in the room, didn't have contact with their male counterparts on a regular basis. The pink cheeks of Fluttershy and Luna had me a little worried until Twilight spoke up. “Great! Of all the examples of your species that we could have got, we got a soldier, somepony who seems to enjoy annoying one pony in particular, and he's a charmer to boot!!! What I wouldn't give to see Discord right now!!!”

As she said this, I suddenly started to feel strange. I could feel a.....energy.....and it was heading right for us. It didn't feel like an threat, but it didn't feel friendly either. “Girls, get behind me, something is coming.” They looked at me for a second before obeying, trusting my judgement. I had the sudden urge to start counting down.

“Three”

“Two”

“One”

As I said the last number, there was a flash of white light, followed by a mad cackling. As the light faded, there was only one thing standing there. Equestria's biggest fucktard and resident draconequus. Discord. Dammit Twilight, you just had to open your mouth!!! He started to walk towards us, and that's when I let out my warning.

“Take one step closer and I'll rip off one of your horns and shove it up your arse.” It had the desired effect and he stopped, looking at me blankly. He took another step forward and I moved to meet him. He started to move back but I had closed the distance quickly, bringing my knee up to my chest and kicking him in his stomach. As he doubled over, I gabbed him in to a head lock and got hold of the nearest horn. As I started to twist, I could see his talon clicking repeatedly, trying to use his chaos magic on me. He then looked to the other inhabitants of the room, who all wore shocked faces. He managed to speak whilst gasping for breath.

“Fluttershy......help......me!!”

“Now Lucky, let him go. He may still be a bit of a prankster, but he's my friend.”

On hearing this, I released my grip and he hit the floor gasping. Fluttershy went to move to him, but I intercepted her, keeping myself between them and Discord at all times. Eventually, he straightened up and sat with his back against the wall, and he looked to Princess Luna. “Well Lulu, it seems your guest is awake. Strong too. Strange how my magic doesn't work on him.” He clicked his talon a few more times, and yet nothing happened.

I only had one theory on this, and the evidence seemed to support it, but I still couldn't reveal much. “Strange creature, just what the FUCK are you?”

“I am a draconequus, my name is Discord, and I am the spirit of chaos. So why isn't my magic working on you?”

Good, he asked. “I can only assume it's because my species evolved from chaos. Even now, somewhere on my planet there is fighting going on. If there was a centre of the universe for chaos, my world would probably be it.” Let's see how you deal with this.

“How delightfully chaotic. Would you permit me to travel there with you?”

“If I knew how to get there.......maybe. But here is a question for you. Can you dodge bullets or shield yourself from them?”

“What on Equestria is a 'bullet'?”

“That's what I thought. Can you be killed?”

“This body can, but my spirit would endure.”

“Then.......you would be dead within a day, and you body would be dissected to see what makes you you. You would then more then likely be put back together, stuffed, and shoved in a museum as an oddity.”

'THUD' 'THUD' 'THUD' I sighed and didn't even bother to look behind me. “They all just fainted, didn't they?”

“Yes, but strangely enough Fluttershy lasted the longest.” Something clicked then and we both started laughing.

“Come on, let's get them to bed. They've had a rough night.” Discord picked up Twilight and Luna in his magic whilst I slung Fluttershy over my shoulder. It hurt like a bitch but it was worth it. Walking outside, and after a brief explanation to the confused guards, we were led to the respective rooms and after Discord had transferred Twilight and Luna to their beds he stopped and looked at me.

“I know she's adorable, but don't you think it would be better if Fluttershy woke up in her own bed?”

“Shut up.”

Fluttershy awoke feeling refreshed and stretched out on her bed. Wait bed? But how did I..why am I...what happened last night? Looking around she saw something huddled up on the couch and went over to investigate. Pulling back the covers revealed him, scrunched up and uncomfortable so the she could get a good nights rest. Oh, this isn't my room. She needed it after all the nights staying up watching him. Gently nudging his shoulder, he rolled over and opened his eyes.

“um, good morning. I was about to head down to breakfast and I was wondering if you'd like to join me. If you want to, I don't mind if you won't....”

He just looked at her before standing up and stretching, causing his bones to pop.

Shit that felt good. Now what's this about breakf...what the fuck is that smell? Lifting my arm up I sniffed and immediately blanched, earning a confused look from the mare in front of me. “Breakfast sounds wonderful, but maybe I could freshen up first. I smell like a pongo.”

“Okay, the bathroom is through there, and there are plenty of towels to accommodate your size.”

I nodded and started to walk towards the door when she asked me a question. “What's a 'pongo'?”

Sighing I turned back to her. “A pongo is a slang term, at least in my country, for any non-commissioned officer and below in the army. It comes from the saying 'where ever the army goes, the pong goes'.”

“But if you are a soldier doesn't that make you a pongo?”

“Huh? No, I'm a crab, or a Brylcreem Boy.” I could see more questions coming and I stepped in before I started telling her the military history of my country. “Later, right now I stink and I feel dirty, so I'm going to clean up.” My stomach then decided to remind me that, as far as I knew, I hadn't eaten for ages. “And then we're going to get breakfast.”

The mare started giggling to herself.

I had no idea how long I stood under the shower. At first I wondered why it was so high up for ponies, but once I felt the warm water thudding in to my skin, I only had one thought running through my mind.

Eventually I had decided, or rather my stomach did, that it was time to get out. Switching off the refreshing flow, I wiped the suds from my eyes and turned to get out. Now, as I thought I was alone, I hadn't bothered to close the shower curtain. That was a mistake. There was a flash of light as I grabbed the curtain and let out a girlish scream, hiding myself away.

“Oh come on, that was for science!!! Now come out and turn the other way so I can get both profiles!”

“No!”

“Why won't you let me do this? It could help ease you transition in to society for the duration of your stay.”

Why did she say that like she found me a way home? “Because I don't plan on walking around naked!!! Humans wear clothes!!”

There was silence for a few moments. I peeked my head and saw Twilight looking at the photo. It had to be a fucking Polaroid!!! And then the pin finally dropped. “Oooooh. Breakfast will beinthemainhall.Fluttershycanshowyouthewaybye!” And with that I was finally left in peace to dry off and get dressed. As I entered the main room Fluttershy was waiting sat on the bed for me.

“What was that kind of singing?” And now I get arrested for crimes against everyones ears!

“I was singing?” A nod. “What was I singing?”

“I couldn't quite hear it properly, but the bits I heard sounded like 'Jenny had a chance, well she really did, Instead she dropped out and had a couple of kids, Mark still lives at home cause he's got no job, He just plays guitar and smokes a lot of pot '. What's pot?”

“Pot is something to make your brain cells die. You see things that aren't there. And you don't make much sense to others around you. Oh and apparently you get the munchies quite bad.”

“Oh my, that sounds like de-coloured rainbow!!” Seriously, that stuffs real? If Pinkie puts it in her cotton candy.... "But your singing, what type was that?”

“That is from a genre on my world called 'rock', specifically 'punk rock'. The group is called 'The Offspring', and the song is called 'The Kids Aren't All Right'.”

“What's it about?”

“Okay now you're asking. My interpretation of it is it's about an area full of possibly successful children and that they are all going to be big in what they choose to do, but things don't go right for them. For example, the guy who plays his guitar and smokes pot? He probably comes up with good music while high, but he never writes it down, so when the effects wear off, he has nothing. And the one who dropped out and had kids? She could have had a decent career, but now she doesn't have time because of motherhood. Which is where the line 'Longing for, Used to be' comes in. If things were the way they were before, then they may have been able to make something of themselves, but you can't change the past. Anyway, that's what I get from it. Now lets eat. Oh, and don't tell anyone else about my singing.”

“Cross my heart and hope to fly!”

We entered the main hall to find the others waiting with the exception of Twilight. I wonder what she's up to? As I went to sit down, Pinkie Pie seemed to grow increasingly nervous and wouldn't stop watching me. It was a little disconcerting, but the fact that there was food on the table made me ignore it. As expected, it was set for equines and fruit eaters. Shrugging, I reached for the fruit bowl when Celestia cleared her throat. I continued to play ignorant to the fact I knew who they were.

“Good morning big white one. Thank you for inviting me to breakfast.”

“You're welcome, and please, call me Celestia. I have one quick question I would like to ask you, although I believe I all ready know the answer.”

“Okay then, shoot.”

“Does you species eat meat?”

I spat out the half a mouthful of the apple I was eating.......on to a very unamused Rarity. “Uh, oops. Sorry about that. To your question, yes we eat meat. We get a lot of protein from it, although some chose to have a vegetarian diet.”

“Are you a vegetarian?”

“No ma'am I'm not. I like my steak too much to give it up.”

“I see, please wait here a moment.” She got up from the table and walked out of my sight.

“Is she going to get the guards?”

They didn't have time to respond as Celestia came back. “Girls, you may wish to leave now, as this may.......disturb you and cause unnecessary distress.”

Rarity was the one to speak up first. “We wouldn't dream of leaving you and your guest, your majesty.”

“Majesty?” I asked, playing dumb.

“Yes, majesty. You are currently dining at the breakfast table of Princess Celestia, co-ruler of Equestria and raiser of the sun. And your eating habits leave a lot to be desired in such company.”

Trying to stifle a laugh, and barely succeeding, I turned to Celestia and bowed low. Best play along. “I am sorry if I offended you in a way your highness. If I do something not to your liking, please inform me so that I do not do it again.”

“It is quite all right Mr, Lucky, I believe. I am sure there are others that will do so in my stead.” As she said this she shot Rarity a amused smile. “Now girls, if at any time you feel queasy, then please do not hesitate to leave.” She turned her head to where she had previously walked over to. “Bring it in!”

The first thing to hit me was the smell, and my stomach answered in kind, earning a giggle from Fluttershy. As I heard a set of squeaky wheels turning, I turned my head and met the gaze of a Griffon with a chef hat on. He picked up a tray with a lid on and placed it in front of me. “There you are sir, a proper breakfast for a warrior such as yourself.” With that he lifted the lid and I thought I had died in my sleep.

“BACON!!!!!” Diving in was probably not the best way to go, but if I had been out for a few weeks, then it was at least two months since I'd tasted the crispy burnt flesh of pork. The only thing I could hear whilst stuffing my face was a mad cackling and a soft laughter, mixed with 5 gasps. One of those is for the way I'm eating, but I don't give a fuck.

Author's Note

So I snuck another reference to one of my favourites in there. It's subtle, and yet at the same time it's not.
And this time I'm not going to tell you which one!!!

I hope somepony gets it!!

Who'd thought it? Followed by curiosity almost killing the pony, and a range day.

I was about three quarters of the way through my meal when another entered the hall. “Sister, I think you should know that Disc.....is that.....bacon?”

“Try to stop me eating it and see what happens.”

“Actually, I was.....going to ask.....if I might have some?”

There were more gasps around the table, followed by more snickering from Celestia. I just stared on blankly whilst my brain stopped working. Brain needs to reboot. Error. Reboot.exe not found. I could just make out a rather disturbed voice which belonged to Rarity. “Princess, are you saying.....that you wish to.....eat....meat?”

“Before my.....unfortunate events, I was the ambassador to other kingdoms, some of them where they eat meat. It would have been considered rude of me to refuse, and I found some of it quite....refreshing to the taste. I have not had the opportunity to sample the latest treats from other lands, and I admit I miss some of them. Most of all, bacon.”

I scraped half of what was left on to a separate plate and slid it over to Luna. As she sat down, I gave a grin and locked her in a challenging gaze. All I heard from the head of the table was a quiet sigh and a whisper. “Oh dear, here we go.”

“Sister, a countdown if you would?”

“Very well, but do not give yourself indigestion....again. Three.” We carried on staring at each other.

“Two” We both leaned closer to our plates.

“One” I got my hands ready and Luna's horn started glowing.

“Go!” I started shovelling the bacon in as fast as possible, whilst Luna did the same opposite me. There we six outbursts of laughter and one scream as the white unicorn galloped out of them room. I had made good headway and thought I was winning till a voice spoke up on the other side of the table.

“Done!”

I couldn't believe it, beaten at a bacon eating contest by a horse!! Okay pony, but still. I wasn't about to let her have the last laugh though, and if a comment about the night sky can make her blush then........I'm probably going to be in dungeons for this one. “Wow, you must have a good gag reflex to swallow that fast.”

The result was instantaneous. Every set of cheeks present turned a delightful shade of pink, except for Pinkie's, which went yellow for some reason. Weird. “Okay, I'm just.....going to go for a walk now. Don't worry I'll stay within the castle grounds.” Grabbing a handful of bacon, I made my way out of the room and started wandering the halls.

I could hear steps behind me, but every time I turned around the halls were empty. Getting bored of this, I turned a corner and hid behind a plinth, seeing just what I expected to. The two guards from inside my hospital room trotted round and looked on blankly as to where I was. Standing up, I walked past them over to a window. “You know, if you going to have me followed, perhaps some pegasi might be best so I don't know you're there.”

Looking across the gardens, I spotted something purple with another purple being, although smaller. And in Twilights magic was a green and black object about eighty centimetres long. I watched as a smaller black object was levitated next to it, and she turned them both over before picking up another of the black objects and looking at the bottom of the larger thing.

“What is she.....FUCK!!!” Turning to the guards, I spoke quickly and urgently. “You two, teleport us to Twilight Sparkle now!!”

“Why should we d”

“Because she's either about to kill herself or another!”

'Flash'

“Okay Spike, we'll start with this one as it's the first one we saw.” Twilight began levitating the weapon in front of herself and turned it over giving it a good look. “It seems to be designed for creatures with claws of some sort, but the races we know of that have such appendages use spears and swords, much like our military. It has a fairly decent weight, meaning that it can't be carried for long periods of time.”

She then picked up an empty magazine and looked it as well. “This seems to fit in to the hole on the underside, but it seems to be empty, so I'm not sure how this works. However, this one seems to be full, and I shall pace it in the hole to see what happens.” As she said this, she grabbed another magazine with her magic and rotated them to face her.

She didn't notice the flash behind her.

She slid the magazine in to the weapon, hearing a satisfying click. “Well, it fits in there, but why isn't doing anything? And what’s rattling about?” Turning the rifle over, she spotted the thing sticking out of the side. Pulling it back revealed the gold objects inside, and she let it go forward again. Turning it so that the small hole was facing her, she used her magic to see in to the dark. “Okay, there's the pointy bit, but why won' it....”

“Okay, there's the pointy bit, but why won' it....”

She didn't have time to finish as I shoved her over and grabbed the weapon. “Never.....NEVER look down the barrel of a loaded gun!!!” I pulled the magazine out and slid the cocking handle back, watching the round eject. Leaving the bolt open, I placed the rifle down and turned back to Twilight.

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to....I was.....just.....curious.” I could see she was on the verge of tears, and so I took a deep breath before continuing.

“You could have injured yourself or another. Or worse, killed.” At this she began to hyperventilate. I looked to the guards who just panicked, not knowing what to do. Remembering a scene from a fairly decent film, I sat down and pulled her back against my chest.

“You need to calm down. Feel for my heartbeat and listen to my breathing. Focus on slowing down. Take deep breaths. In through the nose and out through the mouth.”

As I held her I could feel the panic, but she gradually started to calm down. She was almost back to normal when we were separated by a spear hilt being thrust between us. I doubled over coughing as it caught the wound on my stomach.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING TO MY SISTER???”

I couldn't form a coherent response, but fortunately I didn't have to. “Captain, he....just saved your sisters life.”

“EXPLAIN!”

“She was fiddling round with his weapons, and he got here just before something bad happened.”

Armour turned back to me as I managed to regain my breathing and stand. “You remember what I did to those Dogs?” He nodded. “Your sister almost did that to herself or another. Then she began to hyperventilate, so I helped her to regain her normal breathing rate.”

As he seemed to calm down, the doors to the gardens burst open, and my breakfast companions rushed out, Luna leading the group. “CAPTAIN ARMOUR!!!! HOW DARE YOU TREAT ONE OF OUR GUESTS IN SUCH A WAY!!! AND AN INURED ONE AT THAT!!! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF??!!

He turned to me, and did something I was not expecting. He bowed. “I am sorry for causing you harm, please forgive this breech of protocol.”

I leant over and pulled him up, putting my hand on his shoulder. “There is nothing to forgive. We are both soldiers, trained to react without thinking. You did the right thing in caring for your sister, you just went about it the wrong way.” Suddenly I had two lavender legs wrapped around my shoulders.

“I'm sorry for touching your things, the curiosity in me was just too much to handle.” She got back down off me. “Now as we are all here, why don't we introduce ourselves. I'll start. My name is......”

“Twilight Sparkle, personal protégée to Princess Celestia, proprietor of Ponyville Library, and Bearer of the Element of Magic.” A stunned silence. Ahh screw it, might as well do the rest..

Turning round I started from left to right. “Applejack, strong and dependable farmer, works Sweet Apple Acres with her brother Big Macintosh, living with Granny Smith and Applebloom. Bearer of the Element of Honesty.”

“Rarity, owner of Carousel Boutique and celebrated dress maker. I assume it is you who I have to thank for these clothes. I have never seen such superior craftsmanship.” She started blushing at the compliment. “And Bearer of the Element of Generosity.”

“Rainbow Dash, self proclaimed fastest pegasus in Equestria. One of the best stunt fliers around. Bit of an egghead.”

“Hey!”

“Want another hoof massage?” Silence. “Bearer of the Element of Loyalty.”

“Fluttershy, a wonder with animals and one of the gentlest of souls you could ever meet.” And there she goes, hiding behind her mane just as expected. “Bearer of the Element of Kindness.”

Looking around, I found there was one missing. Princess Luna began to speak. “I have been told to inform you that Pink.....” I put my hand up to stop her and looked around the garden. Walking over to a well, I started turning the handle to pull the bucket up, and I was rewarded with a pink mare sitting in it.

She immediately jumped out and started to back away from me. “I'm.....I.....didn't......accident.....” By now she was against the wall, and as I leaned in close she closed her eyes and began shaking. “Please don't eat me......”

Deciding to have a bit of fun with her I started to sniff, and prodded her in the side. “Hmmm you'd be a bit chewy, but I can live with that. As for the smell.....well cotton candy is a bit too sweet for me.” Come on Discord, if I'm right and chaos is all around me, then you'll hear my thoughts. “I want a water bomb in my hand”. As soon as it went out, I felt something appear in my hand. I guess he heard me. “Open your eyes.”

As she did this, I brought my hand round and dumped it on her head, soaking her. She looked at me confused until I spoke. “Pinkamena Diane Pie, you only spooked me by being so close. I know it was an accident, so don't worry about it. Come now, a smile is much more befitting the Bearer of the Element of Laughter is it not? Oh, and thanks for the blueberry muffins.”

Ever found yourself flat on you back in a bear hug with candy floss in your mouth? No? Don't try it. “Pinkie....can't.....breathe....”

“Oh....sorry, he he.” With her climbing off me, I managed to sit up and look around. There were only two other ponies I had not spoken to yet. Turning around, I bowed as low as I could.

"Princess Celestia, Princess Luna. Co-rulers of Equestria, raisers of the sun and moon. It is a honour to be in your presence, and I thank you for the help you have given me.”

Celestia leaned forward and put her head on my shoulder. “Rise, you are not one of our subjects, so you do not have to bow to us. Now, what is your name.” Simple enough. “And how do you know about us?” Fuck.

“My name is Alec Luckes, I am a human from a planet called Earth, millions of miles away I guess. As for knowing about you, well......on my world we have.....stories, myths if you will, of this place. Not many believe as there is no evidence, but I am firm believer that there is always some truth in where these stories come from. Your world is once such myth, although being here proves otherwise.”

The one I hoped would not pick up on the half truths spoke up. “Are we really all myths on your world? Imagine that girls, we are all legends!!” Thank fuck for that. Wait, did she just wink at me? Shit.

“Admiral, I'm concerned about this design. It looks familiar, but why would they make it look like that?”

“How do you mean it looks familiar?”

The newly appointed Group Captain pulled up a holographic keyboard and began typing in commands. A webpage with Google appeared. “It looks like a Prowler-class vessel from the Halo universe. Those things don't exist, so why does the Luna look like one?”

“Good question, and here's your answer. What's Alec's favourite game?”

“Well, it's Halo, we all know he's a geek when it comes to.....oh.”

“Yeah, I think the ideas came to them from his mind. He must've been bored. You know what he does then, runs through the levels in his mind thinking of other ways to complete them. It's the only explanation I can think of. Now come on, we need to get you all up to speed on how to operate the Luna, and she's due up in thirty.”

“Yes sir.”

After the introductions, Twilight had sheepishly asked me if I could teach her about my weapons. It turns out the guards had scoured the Everfree and Whitetail Woods looking for my hideout, and they found it, and brought all my stuff here. Celestia had allowed me the use of a uninhabited section of the garden for my lesson. After Armour had studied the effects and put up a shield to stop ricochets of course.

“Okay what we have hear are weapons called firearms, commonly called guns. There are many different classifications, and I only have three to show you. I'll start with the smallest.”

“This is called a pistol. It is semi automatic. When one round is fired, the gases and pressure force the slide back, ejecting the spent casing and preparing the next round. It then pushes it forward in to the chamber and gets it ready to fire again. Okay then Twilight, questions?”

“What's a casing and a slide?”

Taking the pistol apart, I led her through a basic weapon lesson, and then tested her on it. Picking up a piece of the weapon, I showed it to her and waited.

“Uh, firing pin!” Next piece.

“Recoil Spring” Next piece.

“Uh, I don't know that one.”

“This is known as the “body” or the “trigger mechanism housing”. Now time for a demonstration.” Putting it back together, I slid a full magazine in and showed her in slow motion how it picked up the next round and ejected the spent ones. I then stood up and walked in to the 'safe zone' and told her to watch carefully. I fired the whole clip against the sand bank that had been built up in front of me.

“Why does the slide not go forward when it's empty?”

Pulling out the magazine, I showed her the little catch on the side. “When it is empty, this little bit pushes the hold open lever up, so that it can signal you to reload. If you are going to reload, you just put a new clip in, and let the working parts go forward. It's like if there was more bullets in it, but in slow motion. If you aren't going to reload, you let the parts go forward and pull the trigger. This is known as 'easing springs', so that they don't give out under stress.”

“Okay, so that's a pistol. What's next?”

“We'll do the one you had a look at. This type is called a rifle. This particular one is a L85A2, or a SA-80. It's an A2 because it is a second generation of the weapon. The A1's were crap. Now, before I fire it, I'll take it apart and see if you can identify the parts.” Quickly disassembling the weapon, I laid it out in the blanket I was provided.

“Okay, I can see the recoil spring, the TMH, the barrel....and the firing pin. I don't know the others.” I then explained to her the other parts and she asked why they were so different. I reassembled the rifle as I replied.

“Easy, this is either a semi automatic, or fully automatic. Watch.” Chambering a round, I set it to 'repetition' and clicked the safety off. Firing a couple of shots, I turned back to Twilight. “See how I needed to pull the trigger each time?” She nodded. “Watch what happens in automatic.” I held it as tight as possible and squeezed the trigger, letting a burst of ten rounds out. This drew the attention of Shining Armour.

“You can fire it that quick?”

“Actually, this weapon has a fire rate of about four hundred rounds per minute. We have weapons that fire thousands of rounds a minute.”

“Why would you need such a thing?”

Sighing, I turned to face him. “My species is quite innovative. We have created some truly incredible things, but we are always thinking of new and improved ways to kill each other. It's just in our nature. The difference between some of us though, is that some use this ability how they see fit, and they don't care about the consequences. My nation is not one of these. We may have these capabilities, but we use them to defend ourselves, and others when the need arises. None of us likes killing, but if we must, then we do.”

I suddenly found myself wrapped in a massive dark blue wing. “It must be a horrible place, where you come from. I have seen wars and know what they can do to ones soul.”

“Don't get me wrong, most of us want peace, but there will always be those that disagree about something, and willing to use violence to get what they want. War is a horrible thing, but when you set it against the other things we have created, it is purely a blemish upon a beautiful thing. Now..” I said as I pulled away from her. “Time to finish the lesson.”

“Finish, but we've only just started!”

“I only have three types of weapon Twilight.”

“But you have five of them!”

“Yes and three of them are the same type, all rifles. Now on to the last type.” I picked up the sniper and began the lesson, stripping the rifle down and letting her name the parts. She got them all right until she asked about what I hoped she'd notice. “Where are the gas parts and recoil springs?”

“That's easy. There aren't any.”

“What?”

“This type is a bolt action. It means when I fire a round, I have to put a new one in manually. You can get semi automatic snipers.....but I wasn't really given a choice. Time for the demonstration. Hey Strike!” I had long since learned that my 'escorts' names were Lightning Strike and Nova Fusion, no points for guessing their talents! “I need double the sand.!” The unicorns horn glowed as he started to put more sand on the range. Turning back to Twilight I continued my lesson. “The reason it doesn't have any gas parts or recoil springs is because the full force of the gases is then used to propel the bullet." She gave me a confused look.

"This gives it extra power, as this weapon is designed to used at distance. Captain Armour, how far away was that building I was on?”

“About three quarters of a mile away.”

“You stopped five Diamond Dogs from that far away with out any other injuries?”

“There was another injury, Twilight.” I turned to look at Celestia. “And I'm surprised I'm not in the dungeons for it.”

“I understand why you did it, and I am grateful you made that choice. Please, continue your lesson.”

“Thank you, your majesty. Now watch as I use this one.” Going prone, I opened the bi-pod and looked down the scope. “Fusioin, build me some bricks up about three quarter of the way down.” A glow of a horn and I was looking at a half foot thick wall. Resting the butt against my shoulder, I switched the safety off and pulled the trigger. The bricks flew apart and the sand erupted, then we heard a scream.

Setting the safety to on and dropping the rifle, we all ran round to the other side. Lying on the ground was a white unicorn stallion who had a blonde mane, with a bit if clothing that looked like the lapels of a dinner jacket and a bow tie lying next to him. They were shredded and there was a hole in the wall behind him. He was very lucky not to have been killed. Giving him a once over, my eyes landed on his cutie mark. It was a four pointed gold star placed diagonally on top of a four pointed silver star. There was only one pony it could be. Prince Blueblood.

Aw shit.

Author's Note

Okay guys, I need a bit of help. I'm no good at thinking of pony names, and this chapter was delayed until I could think of one for Nova Fusion. That took almost an hour. So here's the deal. If you can think of names for them, then please let me know. They can be oc's if you wish, but at the moment I am looking for names for the Guards and Castle staff. All I'm after is a name, a quick description, and what their cutie mark is. If you do have one you want to appear in the story, PM me or leave a comment on my page. If you do have a bit of a backstory for them, PM me and I'll try to work out away to fit them in to the story. And don't worry, you'll get to see Strike and Fusion's talent in action at some point. I have plans for those two.

Nothing else to say, so have American Pony.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=f70cgcpbSZw]

Why you shouldn't let drivers fly, changing times, and another massage.

One week later.......

“....so another two weeks of physio and hydro therapy, and your muscles should feel like they've returned to your full strength. Until then, please no more falling off balconies.”

“Yeah, sure thing doc.” Lazing around in a fucking amazing pool for two hours a day? Yes please!! Massage from a mare every morning and evening? Much nicer then you'd think. Just don't......close your eyes. The first session was a little.....embarrassing. “So we done here? I think my 'nurses' are looking for me, I managed to ditch them on the way here......again.”

“Ah yes, the 'Cutie Mark Crusaders Nurses'. I look at them and I see the future of Equestria. Oh, and I'd like to personally thank you for saving them when you first arrived.”

“Really? Why?”

“Scootaloo is my wife's niece.”

Scootaloo has a family? “Uh doc.....about that. Some of the stories we have depict a filly like Scootaloo as having no home or living in an orphanage. Are her parents, you know?”

“Her parents? I believe they came to the castle to look after them at the Gala. I hear they want to meet you. So do the other fillies as well, Sweetie Belle I believe. Unfortunately for the other one her parents are no longer with us, but she has no need to worry. If you saw her brother you'd understand.”

“Big Macintosh. He's here?”

“Do you know of him?”

“Yeah.....yeah I do. And I owe him an apology. Catch you later doc.” As I got up to leave, I could hear a commotion outside the door. Exactly as expected, Strike and Nova were blocking my 'nurses' entrance to the doctors office, whilst they were saying that as they are my nurses, they don't need to worry about patient-doctor confidentiality. “Girls, I'm done here, I know I ditched you again, but you were just taking too long, and I would have missed my appointment. You know how doctors like to keep to their timings.”

Scootaloo looked up to me with a rather excited grin. Okay, that's just disturbing. Why have I got 'Come and play with us Danny' going around my head. “Lucky, you need to come with us!!! There's something you need to see!!”

“Okay girls, lead the way. Gentlecolts, I assume you're coming as well?” Two nods. “Very well, let us go see this mystery!”

“DANIEL!!! PULL THE FUCK UP!!!!”

“Relax, the Luna can handle it.”

“I knew there was a reason we shouldn't let the driver try to fly this thing!!!!”

“Hey look!! The Atlantic!! And it's getting closer!!”

“Daniel, if you don't pull up right now, then so help me I'm going to bitch slap you back to the middle ages!”

“Yes sir, pulling up. Levelling out. Aaaand we're good.”

“Thank you. Okay Ben, it's you turn to land us. Take the helm.”

“On it sir.”

The admiral sighed as he sat back in the command chair. “Never letting him fly again....”

The fillies were leading us to a part of the castle that I hadn't been to yet. Not that I'd seen all of it, this place was huge!!! I still got the odd look here and there, but the guards had been told about me and most of the castle staff had met me at some point over the last week. “Hey Strike, what's this part of the castle?”

“This is Canterlot Tower. It is where the important parts of our history are recorded in a different way.”

Canterlot Tower, isn't that where the Elements are kept? I was snapped out of my thoughts as Sweetie Belle spoke. “We're here.” The guards at the door pulled them self in to what looked their attention position, and Nova knocked on the door whilst Sweetie continued. “I'm glad you chose the smart clothes my sister made for you today. You're going to need them.”

I'm going to need smart clothes? Just what the hell for? A voice rang out from inside the room. “And now fillies and gentlecolts, I give you today's guest of honour.” As the doors swung open in a yellow aura, Strike leaned closer to me.

“Try to walk tall, it will impress them.” Impress whooooooa, that's a lot of fancy ponies!!! I followed the fillies along the red carpet that went through the centre of the room, and up to a set of steps that had Celestia and Luna at the top, with the Element Bearers lining up the sides. They each had a stunning dress on, obviously crafted by Rarity. You know for ponies, they're actually quite ho......no, get your mind out of there!!! It was then I noticed the fillies had dresses on as well.

We got to the bottom of the steps and the girls bowed in front of me, followed by Nova to my left and Strike to my right. I know I was told I didn't need to bow, but something told me that here I had to, and not just for the princesses image.

“You may rise.” We all stood up and I stood to attention to the best of my abilities. “We have asked you to come here today as our honoured guest. A little over three months ago, you appeared on our world.” So I was out for about a month and a half. That makes it around May back home. “At first my sister and I were not sure to make of you, but as we watched your actions on the first day, we understood just what kind of soul came here. You first action was to rescue these three fillies from an unknown, but certainly unwanted fate.”

At this, the fillies all turned round and motioned me to crouch down. As I did, I had three sets of hooves wrapped round me, and Celestia continued. “We decided not to always watch you after this, knowing you would not put our subjects in danger at all. We saw this when you pointed you weapon at Twilight Sparkle but did not take action. And more recently, you have in fact saved their lives as well.” The Bearers all turned at the same time and walked down the steps, with me finding myself in the centre of a group hug. “You also saved my life, and for that I am eternally grateful.” I hadn't noticed, but as she was speaking, she had made her way down and then pulled me in to her embrace. Damn these are some soft wings, I could see myself getting wrapped....focus!!!

“So it is with great pride that I give to you the honour of unveiling something that will remind us of you actions for as long as this castle stands.” She nodded towards a wall that had a curtain hanging over it, and there was a rope to one side. “Whenever you are ready.”

With everyponies eyes upon me, I walked over to the rope and took a hold of it. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, before pulling it down. The curtain fell down, and revealed a stained glass window. At the the top it, showed Applebloom and Sweetie Belle walking along a forest, with me in between them carrying Scootaloo. Underneath that was what looked like the castle gardens, and in the centre were the Element Bearers, and along the red line was Celestia, all looking like they were lying down. Surrounding them were Diamond Dogs, but in the next scene the Dogs were all lying down, and the Bearers were being helped to their hooves........by me.

I was speechless. I couldn't even form any coherent thoughts as the stomping set in. So lost was I that I didn't hear the applause replaced by a stunned silence. Turning I saw a single unicorn stallion had made his way to the centre of the room. “So, that is the creature that nearly killed us? We'll have you know that because of you actions, our planned rendezvous with a lovely mare was ruined! Auntie Celestia, We demand that it placed in the dungeons immediately!!”

Celestia was about to reply, but I walked towards him cutting her off. “Prince Blueblood?”

“Oh, you are evolved enough to talk. Yes?”

“If my actions, which were sanctioned by Princess Celestia, stopped you from going on a date with a more than likely wonderful mare, then well.....she got off lightly.” I got the reaction I wanted, but it started where I didn't expect. Turning around I saw Celestia and Luna leaning on each other laughing their arses....flanks off. And then, like a spreading of The Flood, the entire room erupted in to laughter, embarrassing Blueblood to no end.

“WE.....I......Never...” With that he turned and stalked out of the room, causing even more of an uproar. Once everypony had calmed down, I turned to Celestia.

“I apologise for that your majesty, I have overheard.....talk about him, and from what I've seen his reputation is justly deserved.”

“Yes, he does seem to have his head up his flank. Do not worry, tonight is a celebration in your honour. I know you can not have alcohol due to your medicine, but Applejack has brought along some of her non alcoholic beverages for you.”

“Thank you everybody, this is more that I ever expected. Just you being here is more than reward enough.”

Suddenly, out of nowhere a stage appeared, and a white mare with an electric blue mane popped up, followed by Octavia of all ponies. Mixing classical with techno? This should be interesting. I was about to speak when I was cut off by the party planner herself.

“Come on everypony, let's party!!!”

“Okay Ben, ease her up on the left, we're not level yet. Good, that's better. Put the landing gear down, and gently ease off on the thrusters.” CLANK. “And we're down. Good work.”

“Thank you sir.” As they disembarked, they found a group of scientists waiting for them next to the landing platform. They all looked really excited for some reason.

“Ladies and gentlemen, how may we help you?”

“Admiral, we've found it!”

“Found what exactly?”

“The planet in description!! Large planet, orbited by it's moon AND it's sun!”

“Have you calculated how long it'll take to get their?”

“Yes we have, and we wish we had some better news.”

“How long?”

“With more time, we may be able to....”

“How. Long?”

“Around ten months.”

“Admiral?”

“Stock the Luna. We leave tonight.”

The party lasted well in to the night, with pretty much everybody having a good time. I was having a blast, until I felt something big and heavy tap me on the shoulder. It was Big Mac, and at first I panicked, but he apologised for the way he reacted when we first met, not knowing the full story at the time. I met with Scootaloo's parents, and I could see they adored her for all she was worth, although they wished she'd be a bit less of a tomcolt and more like a filly. I guess some things in the fandom are true.

Eventually, things started to wind down, and I found myself carrying a sleeping Applebloom, whist Nova had Sweetie Belle and Strike had Scootaloo. We put them back in to their room and I made my way to my quarters for the night. Along the way, we bumped in to someone not expected.

Coming from a adjoining corridor was Blueblood, and I thought now was a good time as any. “Uh your highness?” He turned to look at me. “About earlier, I'm sorry for embarrassing you, I did not meant to cause any offence.” His response made me a little suspicious.

“What ever are you talking about? We have not met yet. Now I do not mean to be rude, but it is late and I am tired. Perhaps we can meet in the morning, good night.” As he trotted way, I looked to Strike and Nova, who were just as confused as me. Ignoring this I went in to my room and out on to the balcony. Looking down I spotted something white making it's way across the gardens.

“Strike, Nova?”

“Yes sir?”

“Which way is it to Blueblood's quarters?”

“Back the way he came sir.”

“And that tower over there?” I asked pointing to the one opposite my window. “Does anyone live in there?”

“That is the residence of Princess Cadenza, and Captain Armour.”

“So why is Blueblood going over there?” This doesn't make sense. In the hall he had the reaction that I expected, but just now he responded like he wasn't even there. He was even polite. It's like it......wasn't Blueblood. Shit. “Strike, Nova, I need my weapons.”

“Why?”

“Just trust me on this. Now, where are they?”

“They are in Captain Armours office. If we leave now he may still be there.”

“Lead the way gentlecolts.”

“How is the dear prince?”

“Unconscious, just as planned. And our target?”

“Inside her quarters, and she doesn't suspect a thing. I am about to go join the other two in her chambers. We will be waiting for you. The honour of killing her and getting our revenge falls to you.”

I didn't even bother knocking. As soon as the door was in view I walked through it. Shining Armour was a little taken back and showed it. “What is the meaning of this intrusion?”

“Captain, I need my weapons.”

“And why should I give them to you?”

“Have I given you reason not to trust me so far?”

“No, but still, why?”

“To save your wife.”

Fifteen minutes later and the tower was surrounded. Armour had wanted to go charging in, but I had persuaded him to let me go, reasoning that whoever it was would be expecting him and not me.

“....so this is the plan. Starfyre will take me up to the top of the tower, where I'll use my rope to abseil down to your chambers. If everything is all right, then I'll climb back and and we'll come back down. If not, I'll shout to enter at which point you come in and detain everyone, including your wife. Understood?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Starfyre, let's go.” The massive grey pegasus wrapped his legs around me and flew me up to the top of the tower. When we landed, there was one pony I did not expect to see. “Prince Blueblood?”

“Huh, oh you again. I'm a little busy can't it wait?”

“You know, if you're going to impersonate someone, at least learn their mannerisms before hand.” Before he had a chance to respond I shot forward and grabbed his horn. Twisting, I heard it start to crack and I pulled harder. The result was what I was expecting. As it snapped off, he seemed to waver about, and he let out a shrilling scream. The wavering stopped and we were left with a black pony looking thing, that had eyes with no pupils, a couple of fangs, and insect like wings.

As it tried to fly off, I caught it's hoof and pulled it down to the roof top slamming it in to the floor. Placing my foot on the wing joint, I pushed down with enough pressure to earn a gasp from the Changeling. “What are you doing here?”

Silence. I pushed down harder. I could hear the wing cracking.

“What are you doing here?”

More silence. I put my full weight down on it and broke the wing off, making it scream again. There is no way the others did not hear that.

Putting my foot on to it's other wing, I asked again. “What are you doing here?”

“We are here to get our revenge!”

“Finally, we're are getting somewhere.” I increased the pressure. “How are you going to get you revenge?”

“By assassinating the one responsible!”

Even more pressure, and it started to breath heavily. “Who is your target?”

“PRINCESS CADENCE!!!”

Finally putting all of my pressure down, I snapped it's other wing off. “How many more of you are there?”

“T-t-t-three.”

“And where are they?”

“I-i-i-in the princesses chamber."

“Tell me, can a Challenging with no wings or no horn fly?”

“N-n-n-n-no.”

“That's what I thought.” I picked it up by it's body and walked to the edge. Starfyre then spoke up.

“Sir, what are you doing?”

“Squashing a bug.” There was a scream as I threw it off the roof. “Starfyre, new plan......”

The guards all heard the screaming and looked up to see a dark object falling from the tower. They went to catch it, but it was falling too fast. Just before it hit the ground, it's pupil-less eyes connected with Shining Armour's.

“CHANGELINGS!!!!!!”

“Look, what's Star doing?”

As they all looked up, they could see Starfyre lift off from the roof carrying the human again. They flew a little way out before turning around and heading straight for Armour's bedroom window. The was a stunned silence as Starfyre began to glow.

“ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS?”

“NO.” I shouted back, making sure he could hear me over the air as we sped towards the tower. “JUST REMEMBER TO RELEASE ME AND GIVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TIME TO PULL OFF!”

“YES SIR”

I could see the window getting larger and I heard Starfyre counting down.

“Three”

“Two”

“One” He let go and I was sent sailing through the air.......on a collision course with the window. Thankfully, it wasn't even enchanted and I bust right through it. I heard a female scream and three shocked gasps from the ponies in the room. Standing I looked around. Spread evenly around the room were three guards. Over by a writing desk sat Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.

“Now, I have heard of you and we have not met yet, but I think my husband might be a little annoyed at this intrusion.”

“Apologies ma'am, but he's actually out side with a fuck load of guards.”

“I see. And why is that?”

“Did you four just hear a scream?”

“Yes we did. Did you cause that?”

“Yes ma'am I did.”

“I see, and what caused that?”

I reached in to my jacket to the shoulder holster the Rarity had made for me. “Well ma'am.........I just threw a Changeling off the roof. And now I am about to kill three others.” There was a blur of movement as the guards all jumped towards me, but they were too slow. Taking out my pistol, I shot each one in the head and watched them fall. Before they hit the ground they had all reverted back to their natural forms. I shot them again to make sure they'd stay down.

The door burst open and Shining Armour rushed in, running to his wife and taking her in to his embrace, rocking her softly before speaking. “How did you know?”

“Well, after we put the fillies to bed, I bumped in to Blueblood again. I tried to apologise, but he acted like nothing had happened.......and he was polite. When I went in to my room, I stood out on my balcony like I do before bed each night and spotted him heading this way. I asked Strike and Nova where his rooms were, and when they said the opposite direction, I knew something was wrong.”

“The Changeling that you threw off the roof, what happened to his horn and wings?”

“I ripped them off. I needed information.”

“I see. And throwing him off the roof?”

“He was trying to kill your wife. What would you have done?”

“More than just throwing him off the roof. What were they thinking? Killing a princess would have led to all out war.”

“I can't tell what they we're thinking, but I do know what went through the assassins mind as he hit the ground.”

Cadence then finally spoke up. “And what was that?”

“Ma'am, it was his ass.”

As I got back to my room, I noticed they masseuse had left her trolley behind. Seeing the bathroom door shut, I assumed she was just answering the call of nature. The guards had gone to check on Blueblood and found him knocked out in a broom closet. A Fucking BROOM CLOSEST!!! Lying face down on my bed, I started to unwind after the stressful evening. Hearing the door open and shut, I said my apologies. “Sorry I'm late. I had some spare change to deal with.”

“That's okay. I understand perfectly.”

Wait, that's not the not usual masseuse, who the hell is tha”aaaaaahh.” Her hooves pressed hard in to my back, and it felt soooooo good.

“Let me show you how a real pro does it.”

In the window, I could just make out a rainbow coloured mane in the reflection.

Author's Note

Starfyre belongs to Rain_bow_dsahie

Being split up and a possible reuniting party.

“BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO!!!”

“Scootaloo dear, you have to come back home, school starts again tomorrow.”

“It's not safe there.”

“Why is it not safe at home?”

“Because Lucky's staying in Canterlot!!”

An orange blur whipped past me as I rounded the corner. “Nova, could you go find her and bring her back?”

“Yes sir.” With that he turned and galloped after the runaway filly.

“Now then, Mr and Mrs Fire, what was that all about?”

“Scootaloo doesn't want to come home unless you are there to keep her safe.”

“I see.....well, there is only one thing for it.” Turning to Strike, I posed my question. "So if I proved myself not to be a threat, then why are you two still 'escorting' me?”

“We were actually supposed to stop after your party sir, but we requested to stay with you afterwards.”

“Okay, that's a little creepy. Why?”

“We are....intrigued by you. The way you can switch from an outing personality to a calm and collected soldier in an instant is amazing.”

“So....you're studying me...to see how to be a better soldier?”

“Yes sir.”

“I could think of worse examples. Anyway, what are the chances of getting a few guards stationed in Ponyville until such time as I am allowed to go back?”

“I think if you ask Princess Celestia, very good. Who would you send?”

“Well, it would have to be someone Scootaloo feels comfortable around, which at the moment is you, Nova, and Starfyre. I know you want to study me, but you won't learn much whilst I'm recovering.” Nova came running around the corner with a worried look on his face.

“She's on top of one of the towers!!! I can't get through to her, you have to come quick!!”

As we started to run, we were over taken by two trails of smoke. Making it outside, we looked to where Nova was pointing, but saw no Scootaloo. Her mother swung down in front of us, full of worry for her daughter.

“Where is she? I don't see her! Which tower? She still can't fly properly! What if she fell?”

I heard some hushed talking in the gardens, and calmed her down. “Spitfire, it's all right, come on.” As we got closer to a hedge, the voices became clearer. The first one belonged to a mare.

“So why don't you want to go back?”

We then heard Scootaloo speak, punctuated by sniffling. “It's not safe.....at home. I know mum and dad try to make it.....but without him there.....I don't feel safe.

“And why does he make you feel safe?”

“He helped us in his first day here.....and then he protected us at the Gala......and we didn't even ask him to!! He just did!!”

“But why him? Surely the residents of Ponyville can protect you?”

“But they don't have any training like he does. Big Macintosh can hold his own, but the others are mainly farmers!”

As I got up to walk around the bush, I expected to see one of the castle staff with her, but it wasn't. Lying down on the grass with Scoots was a white pegasus mare in golden armour. They have female guards? How come I've not seen them before? I know stories have them, but you'd think if they existed, I'd have seen one by now. “Excuse me miss, who are you?”

She stood and whipped herself around, placing herself between me and Scootaloo instinctively. “Who speaks to me in such a waooooh. Sorry sir, I didn't realise it was you. My name is Cannon Bolt. Yes, go ahead and laugh, I know it's a colts name.”

“I would never laugh at ones name, more so a mare's. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

“Wow, Twilight was right, you are a charmer.”

“Uh, yes well.....”

“SCOOTALOO!”

“I'm okay mum, I was talking with Cannon Bolt here. I still won't feel safe......but I'll come home with you.”

With speed that you expect from the captain of the Wonderbolts, Scootaloo was wrapped up in a massive hug, soon joined by her father. A voice behind us drew our attention.

“Spitfire? Rapidfire? What are you doing here? And what are you doing to the squirt?”

They looked at each other and nodded, before setting the filly down in front of them. “It's time to let you in on a little secret Rainbow Dash. Tell me, have you ever seen Scootaloo's parents?”

“No, she told me they were always too busy, that they were away a lot entertaining other ponies with their jobs.”

“Sweetie, would you like to tell her?”

Scootaloo nodded enthusiastically. “Rainbow Dash, I'd like you to meet my parents, Spitfire and Rapidfire!”

'THUD'

“Well, after what we've seen of Dash here, I think we should have expected that!” As the laughter erupted, Starfyre came gliding down in to the garden.

“Uncle Starfyre!!!”

“Heya squirt!!” He looked up at me. “So, you managed to find another reason to make Lady Dash faint?”

An amused giggle came from Spitfire's direction. “Easy bro, I don't think 'Lady' Dash will like you saying that.”

“We will call them by the title they justly deserve, Lady Spitfire.”

“Oh stop.”

Looking between the family, I couldn't help but smile. “Well then, I guess I know why Scootaloo was always comfortable around you now Star. If you'll excuse me, I need to go see Celestia. Strike, Nova, are you coming?”

“If it's okay with you sir, and Mr and Mrs Fire as well, we'd like to stay a bit longer.....we've always been a fan of the Wonderbolts.”

“Mum, can they stay, please?” I tried to imagine the look they were getting, and seeing as it was successful, I chuckled to myself and headed inside.

“Your majesty, I request that we be allowed to see this creature. If he is to appear in any of our homes, we wish to be able to tell our ponies not to panic.”

“I understand, however I do not know where he is at this time. Perhaps we could a arrange a proper meeting time at a later date.” Celestia looked up as the door eased open, and he slipped in, walking quietly up behind the other ponies.

I could see the smirk on Celestia's face, and I knew I had her blessing. “A press conference sounds like a wonderful idea, but we would still need to see it before hoof so that there is no mass panic. It may be something so horrible it give ponies nightmares.”

“How could someone as good looking as me give people nightmares?” There were a few screams as everyone in the room turned to look at me, and I walked down the centre as I continued. “I am the one who brings nightmares to the ones who cause them. Princess Celestia, I have a.....request to ask of you”.

“You may ask, but I may not be able to grant it.”

“Thank you. I overheard Scootaloo talking to one of your guards and she is too scared to return home without me. The mare finally got her to agree to go home, but I was wondering if you could send a few guards with them so she feels safe, until such time as I am permitted to return to Ponyville.”

There was a murmur throughout the room before a well dressed stallion stepped next to me and bowed. “Your majesty, as is customary, but no longer practised, I second this one's request.”

Celestia closed her eyes for a moment before responding. “It has been many generations since that custom was used, and had it come from any other family than yours, I would have been a little shocked. But I know your family tries to keep traditions known. Thank you, Fancy Pants.” Wait, what? I got another look at the stallion beside me, and it was indeed Fancy Pants. “Now then Mr Luckes, do you have any candidates in mind?”

“Yes your highness. Scootaloo has shown she is comfortable around Lightning Strike and Nova Fusion. She also seemed to accept Cannon Bolt, and she has an uncle in the guard, by the name of Starfyre. I.....don't really know any others that well.”

“Your majesty, may we request that we go as well?”

Directing our attention to the door, we saw a pegasus stallion and a earth pony stallion had entered and were bowing low. “Sergeant Jet Streak and Sergeant Hammer Legstrong, before I decided, I would wish to know why?”

They both stood up and the pegasus, Jet Streak, stepped forward. “I have a........old friend that lives in Ponyville and I'd very much like to see......her again.”

Legstrong then stepped forward. “The reason I have is the same your majesty, and I wouldn't want to pass the opportunity up to see her again.”

“Very well gentlecotls. You shall leave on the evening train with the others, go pack your things.”

They both bowed low as they backed away. “Thank you, you majesty.”

Turning back to Celestia, I saw a sly grin tugging at the corner of her mouth. Clearly, she knew something I didn't. “They will need somepony in charge, and I know of just the pony. Your request is granted.”

"Thank you, your highness, I shall take my leave.” I left the hall and was about to head back outside when a shout stopped me.

“Wait!” Turning around, I saw my supporter for my request.

“Mr Fancy Pants, how may I help you?”

“For a start, please just call me Fancy. None of the 'Mr' stuff. I understood that you have met Cannon Bolt?”

“Yes, I have. Scootaloo ran away from her parents, and Nova went to get her, but she had climbed on top of a tower. He came back to get us, but when we got there the filly wasn't in sight. I guess Bolt got her down.”

“Yes, my sister is a bit like that. One of the few female guards you know?”

“Wait, sister?” A nod. “Just how many female guards are there?”

“There are around fifty, but most of them are disguised as castle staff. One of the best passes herself off as the castle masseuse. I can tell by the look on your face you have 'encountered' her. Do not worry, I will not say anything. What I wanted to do was thank you for giving my sister this opportunity. Streak and Legstrong are not the only ones with......old friends in Ponyville. They just have to make sure she stays away from Sweet Apple Acres. The restraining order is still in effect.”

“What restraining order?”

“Hmm? Oh, you'll find out soon enough. I look forward to speaking with you further, but for now goodbye.”

“Yeah, talk later, bye.”

“Sir, are we really going to do this?”

“Do what?”

“Leave the Sol system? Ten more minutes and we'll be out of it.”

“We have to go to the other side of the galaxy. We have no choice. Do any of you want to leave him there, with no possible way home?” He was answered by all three of them simultaneously.

“No, Sir!”

“Good. Put us on course and engage the FTL drive.”

After making my way outside and telling them the good news, I was working my way to the Bearers rooms to say my farewells. They were leaving earlier, as they all had jobs to do. Rainbow still hadn't calmed down from the fact that Scootaloo's parents were Wonderbolts.

“Can you believe it? This is so awesome! I know the daughter of two Wonderbolts! And they've asked me to help teach her to fly!!!”

“Dash, if you don't calm down, you're going to create a tornado.”

“Right sorry.”

“So you girls all set?” Twilight walked past me with a bit of parchment and a quill floating in front of her.

“Yes we're on schedule. The packing is done, and now we are double checking the room to see if we missed anything. Then it's time to triple check the check list.

“Riiight. Anyway, I've managed to get Celestia to allow some guards to come stay in Ponyville till I come back.” Fluttershy gently glided her way over to me.

“um, who is coming. If you wouldn't mind telling us.”

“You've got Lightning Strike and Nova Fusion, Starfyre....”

“Scoot's uncle?”

“Yes Dash, Scootaloo's uncle. There is a pegasus mare by the name of Cannon Bolt...”

“Say what? Did you jus' say Cannon Bolt?”

“Yes AJ, I did.”

“Well, Mac'll be happy about that, but Granny sure as sugar won't be.”

“I don't think I want to know. Anyway, as I made the request, two more stallions requested to go, saying they had old..........friends in Ponyville..and they were both female. The couldn't pass the opportunity to ask, and Celestia said yes to them.”

“It can't be, it's jus' can't be......” AJ looked at me with eyes full of hope and something else. “Hammer?

“Yeah, it's Sergeant Legstrong, and also...” 'THUD' “Just what is it with you girls and fainting around me?” Looking at Fluttershy on the floor, I posed my next question. “I'm guessing that she's Sergeant Streak's 'old friend'?”

Rainbow had picked her up and put her on the bed. “If you mean a pegasus by the name of Jet Streak, then yeah. And I'm going to give him the back of my hoof when I see him.”

“Again, I don't think I want to know. Anyway, Celestia is sending someone...pony along to be in charge, but she didn't say who, just that she knew 'just the pony'.”

There was a clatter on the stone floor as Twilight lost her grip on the quill and parchment, but she gained a dreamy look on her face as she closed her eyes and let out a whisper, which in the silence, we could all hear.

“Lieutenant, it's been a long time. Too long......”

Author's Note

I christen this chapter the SS SHIPPING!!!!

So yeah, need a name for this 'Lieutenant'. Also, if you leave a comment, please add '1' '2' or '3'.
This is to decided his race with 1 being unicorn, 2 pegasus, and 3 earth pony.
There are at least 42 of you our reading this, so I hope I get a response this time.

Cannon Bolt is courtesy of Fattymagee1
Jet Streak and Hammer Legstrong are courtesy of The Watcher 509

A bitch slap sanctioned by Celestia.

As they got off the train, the guards all looked round to get their bearings. With the exception of Starfyre, it had been a long time since they were last in Ponyville. Jet Streak was the first to speak up, ruffling his feathers before starting to trot off. "Well, I've got to go pay a visit to somepony, I'm sure you others do as well. So, we'll meet at Sugarcube Corner in a couple of hours. You guys remember where that is?"

"You may be a sergeant, but you are not the one in charge." They all turned to see the owner of the voice, and they were a little shocked to see him of all ponies. Walking off the carriage was a lanky unicorn, but he wasn't just tall, he had the muscle structure to match. If it wasn't for the horn, you'd thought he was an earth pony. "Our first order of business is to head to the old guard station in town, and set about repairs if needed. I will inform the mayor of our arrival, and then I have to also report to the library. Apparently somepony the Princess trusts lives there, and I am to make her known of our arrival as well. Then we shall turn in for the night, and get started in the morning. Are there any problems?"

Jet looked at the Lieutenant and tried to find something to make his case, but failed. ".....No sir."

"Good, I will see you at the guard station in a while. Move out."

"And again, thank you for the hospitality of your town, Miss Mayor. Good night."

As the lieutenant left, he immediately saw a tree house in the middle of town, and knew that was his destination. Knocking on the door, he heard a young male voice call out. “Coming, just a sec!!” The door swung open and he found himself looking at a small lizard.

“Dragon, no wings. Age around fifteen years. Still a baby. I shall leave you alive.....for now.”

“Uh, thanks, I think. How can we help you this late at night?”

“I have been instructed to let the owner of this building know that the guards requested have arrived in town.”

“Oh sure, let me just get her for you.” Turning around, Spike walked in to the centre of the library. “Twilight, you've got a visitor!”

“Wait, Twilight? As in Lady Twilight Sparkle?” It can't be.........

“Lady? Whatever dude!!”

“White Feather?” Turning his attention to the stairs, he spotted the mare in question half way down them with pleasant expression on her face. She is still as beautiful as ever.

“Good evening Lady Sparkle. I have come to let you know that the requested guards have arrived and we will be available for tasking in the morning. I shall take my leave now.”

“Wait, would you like to stay and....talk with me for a bit?”

“No thank you, I must return to my charges.”

As the door shut behind him, Twilight's face dropped and she turned back up the stairs, started to sniffle. Spike, unsure of what just happened, followed after a moment. By the time he reached he door, she was full on crying.

“Twi?” Being pulled in to a tight hug was not what he was expecting, but he knew she needed someone at that point. “It's okay Twi, I'm here for you.”

After half an hour, she had finally calmed down. “So, who was that guy?”

“Remember all those nights I was late back from extended study before we came here?” She could see she had his full attention, and with her happy memories, she continued. “I wasn't always studying. One of the reasons I never made time for friends was because that time was filled.....with him. And now he comes back like nothing happened....”

She started to sniff again, and Spike had an idea. “Get some rest Twi, you're going to need it.”

“Lucky, may I have a word with you?”

“Of course your majesty.”

“Please, call me Luna. I have just come for Tia's chambers, she has received a letter from Spike,. Here take a look.” She floated a piece of parchment my way and I took a hold of it.

Dear Princesses Celestia and Luna,

The guards have arrived in town and the leader came to inform us of their arrival. When Twilight saw him, she grew rather excited, but he seemed to remain cold and collected. After he left, Twilight grew quite upset, and after a cry informed me that some of her late 'study' sessions were with him. I don't know why he is here, but I don't think it is a good idea, giving with how emotional it is making Twilight. Could you please speak with him or send another lieutenant.

Spike.

“I take it this is the one who Celestia said was 'just the pony'? Sounds like a real charmer. How can I help?”

“Follow me.” We walked in silence until we came to the main court hall, and I could hear a hushed discussion going on. “Before we enter, I wish to tell you something important. I have looked in to our history of portal magic, to see if we could find you a way home.”

“What? Really?” But....do I really want to go?

“I.....am sorry. The longest recorded jump was from one side of the planet to the other. The longest unrecorded was my.........vacation that I'm sure you know about. That is why we will understand perfectly if you are to refuse, but I ask that you hear all options before you choose.”

“Choose what? Whether you kill me or imprison me for being dangerous? Or send me back to the Everfree to live among the other beasts, destined to die a horrible death?”

“DO NOT SPEAK TO US IN SUCH A WAY!!! We hold you in much higher regard than some of our subjects!!! After all we have done for you, how could you think such things?”

I could see the hurt in her face, and I felt something that I hadn't felt for a very long time. Shame. “I'm sorry your majesty. My emotions got the better of me. You raised my hopes and dashed them again, but you did not deserve the way I spoke. Please, accept my apologies.”

I was pulled in by her wings a she spoke. “There is no need to apologise. It was unfair of me to do that to you, but you needed to know, as it may help your decision. Come, the others are waiting.” She pulled away and moved to the doors, opening them with her magic. Inside were several guardsponies, Shining Armour, and Princess Celestia.

“Ah, Mr Lucky, so glad you could join us. Please have a seat, we have much to discuss.” The castle furniture maker had made me a set of chairs placed around the castle to accommodate my shape and size, and one of them had been placed in the main hall. I took my seat and Celestia continued. “I'm guessing from your little shouting match with my sister that she has told you of our discoveries. We are not planning on killing or imprisoning you. In fact, I wish to do the opposite.”

“What exactly are you asking me to do?”

“You have proven yourself to be a capable warrior, and I wish to add such strength to my military. I have spoken with our captains and they all agree on this course of action.”

“Just how many guard captains do you have?”

“Seven, one for each race and time of day.”As I looked round at the guards, I noticed that there were two unicorns, two pegasi, and two earth ponies. The day guards were white and grey, and the night guards were those weird bat-pony things. “And then there is Shining Armour, who has overall command. I wish to increase the count to eight.”

“What?”

“If you accept, you will have the same standing as Captain Armour, by his recommendation.”

“Again, what?”

Luna spoke up from beside me. “It is quite clear. You can not return home for the moment, so you need a job. Do not despair, we will keep searching. But for now, what better way for ponies to accept you in our lands than not just being one of our guards, but one of our captains?”

“I don't know what to say. I mean, what would I have to do?”

Celestia closed her eyes and spoke again. “You would be able to defend our subjects in any way you see fit. And you have our blessing to do so.”

“What if I have to harm, or kill one of you subjects to protect another?”

“Then you may do so. They would have all ready broken our laws, and therefore no longer protected by them. But I would appreciate if you kept killing to a last resort. Now, what is your decision?”

Standing, I walked over to Celestia and dropped to one knee. “I am yours to command, your majesties.”

Shining Armour pulled back a curtain to reveal...something. It looked like NCR Ranger Armour, but without the helmet. “We have had a look through our books to see what other races with similar shapes to yourself use as armour. Coupled with what Princess Luna saw in your dreams, we had this crafted for you. It will fit, as the measurements were done by Miss Rarity. Welcome to the Royal Guard, Captain Fire Rain."

“Fire Rain?”

“It is what we got from your weapons. One of our academy ponies saw them in action, and that's what he thought they were making. Appropriate, don't you think?”

“Yeah, sounds good. Okay Princess, Captain Fire Rain reporting for duty.”

“Excellent. I have your first task. You are to go 'speak' to a lieutenant in Ponyville.......”

“Dude, this place is a wreck. I'd rather sleep outside!!!”

“If I hear one more complaint from you sergeant, you will be. Now lets get this place back to it's former spleand....who would be knocking on a run down buildings door this later at night?”

Nova, being the closest walked over and stuck his head out. After a hushed conversation, he came back in. “Sergeant Jet Streak, there is a mare outside who wishes to speak with you.”

Grinning like a madpony, he trotted over to the door. “A lovely mare wanting see me all ready? This must be heaven!!” He made it to door and stuck his head out to continue. “Hey there beautif....”SLAP.

“I don't know why you've come back or what you're playing at, but stay the hay away from Fluttershy. You hurt her once, and I'm not going to let you do it again.” There was the sound of feathers as the mare flew away and there was a small whisper from Streaks mouth.

“......Dash?”

Starfyre's ears perked up remembering the mare he had helped home on his last visit, and her more recent reaction to his sister in Canterlot. The lieutenant's voice snapped him back to reality. “SERGEANT STREAK! WHERE THE HAY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?”

“I was going to follow her and apologise for my actions the last time I was here. I wronged somepony, and the reason I requested this posting was to try and right it whilst I was here. But I don't think Dash will listen to me....”

“We have to get this place restored before we do anything like that.”

“Um, sir?”

“What is it Corporal Starfyre?”

“Well sir, if we are going to stay here, then of all ponies we'll need the Element Bearers on our side. Lady Dash is the Bearer of Loyalty, and the longer we wait to talk to her the worse it will make things. I request that I go now, as we both have something in common.”

“If it is that you are both pegasi, then request denied. But I know you. What's the reason?”

“She is going to be helping my niece, Scootaloo, learn to fly when her parents are away.”

“.....Very well. Go talk to her.”

“Thank you sir.”

Rainbow had been walking around aimlessly for the best part of an hour. She felt good for hitting Streak, but she also felt bad about it. She knew Fluttershy would forgive him, but what he did was just wrong. She looked up and found herself out side Ponyville General, and she closed her eyes to let herself remember being wrapped in the wing of the guard from that night.

“Such rosy cheeks can only make a mare like yourself more beautiful.”

Opening her eyes and looking around, she saw nopony there. “Show yourself, or I'll buck you up.”

“And such passion too.” The voice came from above her, but when she looked, the owner had once again disappeared.

Growling in frustration, she was about to take off when a wing eased over her back. Looking up, she saw the guard from that night, again offering his comfort. “Good evening Lady Dash. What is a beautiful mare doing out by herself at this time of night?”

By now, Rainbow's face was almost entirely red, and she turned away before mumbling something he couldn't hear. Pulling away, he trotted in front of her so she could see him talking. “We have not had a proper introduction, as you have fainted both times we met. I know you have been told of me, and I of you, so I thought it was about time to make myself known.” Taking a bow in front of her, which embarrassed her to no end but she secretly liked, he spoke once more. “My name is Starfyre, and it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Lady Dash.”

'THUD'

Starfyre looked at the mare in front of him and sighed, and knowing that her house wasn't that far, scooped her on to his back before taking wing towards Cloudsdale.

I stepped of the train in the early morning. My new uniform fitted perfectly, and the armoured bits were actually armoured as well. It had runes inscribed on it, to which I was informed that they were malicious spell wards, and all the guards had them on their armour. If I was hit with a spell by accident or in training, then they wouldn't work but if I was attacked with intent, then they would activate. I didn't know how they worked, but I was happy to have them!!!

As I walked through town I noted it must be the weekend, as not even AJ was out setting up her cart. I heard what sounded like a commotion behind me and turned to see a whole host of ponies staring at me with mixed looks. I knew they were curious, but some of them looked like the were ready to kill me. I walked up to the nearest filly and knelt down to her face. Greyish coat, blonde mane, and horn. Dinky.

“Good morning little one. And what are you doing up at this early hour?” There was a stunned silence as they all looked on to see what would happen. The filly over came her worry and responded.

“Me and mummy were going out for a walk, but then I saw you and I ran off and now......I don't know where my mummy is!!!” As she started to cry, I picked her up and hugged her to my chest.

“It's okay. I have business here, but I'll help you find your mother first.” I was about to ask the gathered ponies who her mother was when a rather angry voice spoke behind me.

“Put. My. Daughter. Down. NOW!!!” I saw the worry in the faces of the others and turned to meet the other one. Yep, just as expected. Greyish coat, blonde mane, wings, and bubble cutie mark. Wait, is it Derpy or Ditzy?

I put Dinky down and nudged her forward, but she ran back and hid behind my legs, peering round at her mother. I just looked up and shrugged before returning my attention to the filly. “I didn't mean to run away mum, I just saw him and was curious. He was going to help me find you, honest.”

“Dinky, you know better than to talk to strangers let alone strange creatures, what if....” I put my hand up and interrupted her.

“I can assure you, if I wanted to harm.....”

“My name's Dinky.”

“Dinky, I could have done it with out any of you noticing. As it is, miss.....”

“Derpy. Derpy Hooves.”

“As it is Miss Hooves, I am in fact sworn to protect you.” I lifted up the flap that had been placed over the left chest part of my jacket exposing the Royal Seal, mixed with a symbol from home. “I am in fact here to see how the new guards are getting on, but first I must see Lady Sparkle.”

“Lady? Lucky, why aren't you calling me Twilight?”

I bent down to Dinky and nudged her forward again. “Go on Dinky, your mother was just worried. You'll be fine.” I watched the little filly scamper off before turning around and bowing. “Lady Sparkle, it is a pleasure to see you again.”

“Lucky, why are you being so formal?”

“It is how I am to address you.”

“But you called me Twilight in Canterlot.”

“That was because in Canterlot, I wasn't a Captain of the Royal Guard.” I watched her eyes roam over my outfit before settling on the three crowns on either side of my lapels. I heard her gasp before she spoke again.

“Well then Captain Fire Rain, I believe we have business to discuss. Please follow me.” She turned and walked back to the library and I followed down the centre of the street. I could feel all eyes upon me. Ten minutes later, and I was again walking amongst the ponies of the town, but they didn't seem to be bothered by me. I just walked past them, with my purpose and a new destination.....

“Okay, that's good work. We just need to get some holes in the roof fixed and this place will be back to it's former glory. I shall go check in with the mayor and see what she wishes for us to do.”

“Slow down Lieutenant White Feather. I have something much more important for you to do.”

He turned around and looked at me, not on hint of emotion on his face. “I don't care if you carry the princesses favour, I will not take orders from the likes of you.” He had made his way close, which made my task much easier. “I do not know what you are thinking, but barging in here and trying to order me around is against the laws of Equestria, and I will have.....you.....arrested.....buck.”

He had trailed of because I had lifter the flap on my jacket up again and he had spotted the three crowns on my lapels.

“OFFICER ON DECK!!!” The other ponies fell in line with their fore hooves and back hooves brought together, their attention position.

“Now then Lieutenant, I wish to know why you are being so cold to one Lady Twilight Sparkle.”

“Sir, if you don't mind, that's personal, sir!”

“I see. Well, I don't need you to tell me, as I have all ready spoken to her. I know all I need to”

“What? That little bit.....”SMACK

“YOU WILL NOT SPEAK THAT WAY ABOUT AN ELEMENT BEARER. IS THAT UNDERSTOOD?”

“Yes sir.”

“GOOD. NOW GET YOU SORRY FLANK OVER THERE AND APOLOGISE FOR YOU ATTITUDE LAST NIGHT. IF I GET A LESS THAN SATISFACTORY REPORT FROM LADY SPARKLE, THEN YOU BEST STAND BY. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

“YES SIR!!!”

“MOVE!!!” He turned sharply and galloped out the door. I had no doubts that this was not how they were trained, judging by the worried looks and the grinning Jet Streak. I wasn't having that.

“SERGEANT JET STREAK, FRONT AND CENTRE.”

“YES SIR!”

“SOMETHING FUNNY SERGEANT?”

“Actually sir, yes. I never seen him get his flank handed to him by anypony. SIR!!”

“Good. Now I understand a couple of you have old friends in Ponyville?” They both nodded. “Well, why aren't you out there getting reacquainted?” I got two blank stares. “MOVE!” They both galloped out of the door as well. “Strike, Nova, what about you two?”

Nova stepped forward. “I...have a penpal in town sir, but I have never met her. I have seen her a few times, but never had the courage to talk to her.....she's beautiful.”

“Lady Rarity?”

“How did you know?”

“Doesn't matter. Here, take this and give it to her. And I don't want to see you till tonight. Understood?”

He took the envelope before grinning wildly and dashing out the door. “Strike, let me guess. Pinkie Pie?”

“Yes sir.”

“Go grab a muffin.” Two left.

“Starfyre, who do you have your eye on? Or is it Lady Dash?” A blush started to cross his features. “Well, out with it.”

“I saw her again last night sir. She fainted and I had to carry her home....again.”

“What do you mean again?”

“She fainted the first time we met because of your massage sir.”

“Oh. Well, why aren't you off looking for her?”

“She invited me to lunch, but I thought we'd still be working, so I turned her down.”

“Starfye....”

“Yes sir, moving sir!

I turned to the last remaining guard. “Cannon Bolt.”

“Sir!”

“I know about the restraining order. I spoke with you brother. I believe it is for the farm only correct?”

She looked down and pawed awkwardly at the floor. “Yes sir, it is.”

“Close you eyes, and open then when I tell you to.” She looked a little confused but did as requested. I went to the door and ushered my guest in, placing him in front of her, then taking my leave. I glanced around outside before giving a thumbs up and closing the door. I could here the farm pony's deep voice through the wood.

“Well, good mornin' to you, Miss Bolt.....”

Author's Note

So the vote went 2 > 1 Uniscorn to Pegasi. Little disappointed that there wasn't more votes, but hey ho.
White Feather is courtesy of starfiction.

The badge I used was mix of the British Army's Major and Captain ones. I just replaced the pips with crowns.
And as for the crest, it is the centre of circle of this picture,

With the propellers form this one placed on top

I think I missed a few errors is this one, so if you spot any point them out.

Check ups

I decided to just have a walk around town, let the ponies get use to me being there. I checked my watch and saw that is was Ten-forty five. Fuck, I've been walking around for ages. I wonder how the guards are getting on? Seeing as I was nearby, I thought I'd check on Strike and grab something to eat at the same time.

Entering Sugarcube Corner, I was 'attacked' by two blurs, one whitish and one yellowish. Looking down, I saw Pound and Pumpkin Cake looking up at me with curious eyes. “Oh dear. C-c-c-c-carrot, c-c-c-c-come here.”

I looked up and saw Mrs Cake looking at me, face clear with worry. Mr Cake came trotting out of the kitchen carrying a tray of muffins. “I'm here honeybun, what's....” He stopped moving and looked at me, then down at my feet. “Please don't hurt them.”

“Mr and Mrs Cake, I wouldn't even dream of such a thing. Now, as to why I am here. Is Pinkie Pie about?” As I said this, we heard a door being opened upstairs, and then there was pink blur running down them!!!

“LUCCKKKYYYY!!!” Once again I found myself flat on my back, but I had closed my mouth this time.

“Pinkie, still on the injured list!!! Get off!”

“Oh right. Plus I wouldn't want to be arrested for assaulting a guard captain!!”

“Guard....captain??” We looked to the counter and the shocked faces of Mr and Mrs Cake.

Another voice on the stairs made himself known. “Mr and Mrs Cake, may I present to you Captain Fire Rain, the latest addition to the Royal Guard. He is the one who save the fillies from the Diamond Dogs, protected the Bearers and Princess Celestia in Canterlot, and just the other night saved Princess Cadence from a Changeling assassination attempt. Your foal could not be in safer hooves.”

“He is correct, Cup Cake.”

“Princess Luna?” I turned around, and sure enough, there she was.

“Ma'am, I was not expecting to see you. May I ask what you are doing here?”

“I had not heard from you nor Twilight yet, so I came down to see what was taking so long.”

“Well, I've got them speaking, but I was closer to here, so I thought I'd stop in and see how Strike here was getting on. I'm about to head to the library if you'd like to join me ma'am.”

“Please Captain, I told you to call me Luna. Now come, to the library.”

“Yes ma'am.”

We walked along joking with each other, with me finding newer ways to embarrass her. As we got closer to the library, we could hear the sounds of fighting.

“I don't care!!! I want you gone!!”

“Please Lady Sparkle, I just wish to apologise.”

“That's a load of shit!!!” Okay, she hung around me too much in Canterlot.

“Lady Sparkle, language!”

“AND WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT????”

There was a bright flash and part of the wall blew out, followed by White Feather. He hit the ground and slid along, finishing up at my feet. He looked up at me and struggled to stand, but ended up on his flank. “I tried to sir, but Lady Sparkle wouldn't listen....”

“You tried lieutenant, that is all I wanted. Go get yourself cleaned up, we'll deal with Twilight.” He looked from me to my companion and tried to come to attention. “Feather, go get cleaned up, and then head to the mayors to get some contractors for the roof, and the library. The get your flank over to the hospital for a check up. Now.”

“Yes sir.” As he trotted off, we continued to the library. I went up to the hole and poked my head in.

“Wow Lady Sparkle, remind me never to piss you off.”

“Fuck off.” Okay, enough of this.

“Princess Luna, I need a favour.” I pulled away from the window and started to whisper to her. “Do you know Twilight's parents?”

“Yes, they are well known to the palace.”

“Do you think they'd come down here?”

“To see their daughter, they would travel the world. Why?”

“One second. Spike!” The little dragon ran to the hole in the wall. “Did Twilight say anything about her parents knowing about White Feather?”

“She said they suspected something, but they didn't pry too much.”

“Excellent. Your highness, can you get them down here. I feel we'll need their help with this one.”

“I shall have them here no later than eight this evening. I shall return to Canterlot now.” With that, she took wing, followed by two dark blurs. Must've been her personal guard. Well trained, I didn't see them till they left.

“Spike, keep Twilight busy. Don't let her focus on Feather.”

“I'll do my best.”

Time to check on the others.

After seeing Strike's success and Feathers attempt, I thought I'd check up on Nova. Making good time across town, I was surprised to be hit by a white thunderbolt and bowled over. “Oh thank youthankyouthankyouthankyou!”

“Good morning Lady Rarity. May I be allowed to get up?”

“Oh but of course. A stallion of your calibre should be allowed to walk tall.”

“Stallion of my calibre?” I could see a disgruntled looking Nova behind her, is his horn starting to glow?. “I think somepony is waiting for something.” Turning around, she saw the look on his face, and instantly had her hooves around his neck, and started to purr in a very sultry voice.

“Of course, he doesn't match up to a stallion such as yourself.”

“Just to clarify the point, I was asked to pass this on to him by a mare from Canterlot with a message.”

“Oh come, out with it then, don't keep him in suspense.”

“She said that she 'hopes the her little Novie-wovie has a good night'.”

There was a sigh followed by him raising his hoof to his eyes. “My sister. It's the only way we could have got these tickets at such a short notice.”

“What's the tickets for?”

“They're for one of the most luxurious restaurants in Canterlot......but it's for tonight sir.”

“Corporal Fusion.”

“Sir?”

“See you tomorrow. Oh, but before you go, who's your sister?”

“Thank you sir. My sisters name is Fleur de Lis.”

'THUD'

“JUST WHAT IS WITH THESE MARES AND FAINTING AROUND ME???”

Seeing a rainbow contrail heading to the fields outside town, I followed it to see what she was up to. Upon hearing her voice, I slowed down, and slipped in to the trees.

“Okay, so stretch those wings out, and then limber them up.”

“It hurts a little.”

“It will do till it's fully healed. We're not flying just yet, I'm just teaching you the stretches today. Your first flight should be with your parents, I'm just helping you to get to that point.”

“Oh thank you!!”

“Easy squirt, you're crushing my lungs! That's better, now back to stretching.”

I wonder how well this outfit hides me? Time to find out! “Lady Dash, it is a pleasure to see you again.”

“Lady Dash? Are they talking to you Rainbow?”

“No squirt, they're not. Cover your ears. Show yourself so I can buck you up!!”

Okay, she really doesn't like that!! Stepping out from the tree, and seeing she was facing the other way, I slipped up behind her. “You really think you could take me, Lady Dash?”

If I hadn't of expected it, the hooves could have hurt but as it is, they hit nothing but air, I had a little laugh. “Nice try Dash, but I'm still too quick for you.”

“Lucky?”

“Not any more, I am now 'Captain Fire Rain.'”

“Captain huh?”

“Yep, now what happened between you and one of my corporals?”

“Squirt, can we cut it short today? I promise we can do double the session next time.”

“But I want to stay with Lucky.”

“Squirt, this is not a conversation I want to have near you. Go find your friends to play with okay?”

“Okay.” I watched the disheartened little filly turn around before tugging her tail. “Hey!”

“I'll come find you three later, and get you something nice if you're all good.” She started to smile and bounced away, eager to see her friends. “So......what do you think of Starfyre?”

“He seems nice. A little cheesy. But.....I.......like it.”

“What's this?? The amazing Rainbow Dash thinking girly things??? Run for your lives, the end is nigh!!!”

“You'd best shut the buck up if you know what's good for you.” The smile on her face and the blush on her cheeks betrayed what she said. “It'd be nice if I could be around him with out passing out.”

“Is there a bar in town?”

“Yeah, but they won't serve me or Mac after......you know what, it's one of those things you don't want to know. Why?”

“I think you just need some liquid courage. Who's the pony that runs it, I'll have a word with them.”

“It's Berry Punch.” Why am I not surprised? “But good luck getting her to let me back in.”

“Well, if she says no, I'm sure I could persuade AJ to let us have some cider. Speaking of AJ, time to check up on Hammer.”

“Before you go, I have a request.”

“What's that?”

“Can you free Starfyre for lunch, and.............ask Sergeant Streak to come talk to me. We need to sort some stuff out.”

“Head in to town, your stallion is looking for you Lady Dash.”

“.....buck off.”

Walking through the gateway, I heard grunting coming from the barn. Thinking that was AJ was, I started walking over just as an orange blur came flying out and hit the ground.

“APPLEJACK!!!” Drawing my pistol, I ran in to the barn a sighted on the only living thing in there. “Sergeant Legstrong, what the fuck are you doing?” He looked at me confused before AJ Spoke up behind me.

“Is that it? Mah filly of a sister bucks harder than you. What do they feed y'all in that castle?”

“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON??”

“Sir, we're just sparring. I used to spar with Big Mac, and AJ used to watch us. Once she got old enough, we let her join in. She was always the most nimble of us three.” A quick glance at AJ and she had pulled her Stetson down to hide her face.

“Oh you hush now, ya hear, or Ah'll go get Granny Smith!!”

“With your Granny, AJ? I knew you had a wild side, but I wasn't expecting that!”

“That's it, time fer round two!!” She charged Hammer and knocked him over, sending them rolling through the hey until they came to a stop, him on his back with AJ standing over him.

“You know Lady Applejack, you're the only one of the Bearers not to have fainted around me.”

“That's cos Ah'm not as prissy as the others. But Ah'm sure you'll find something t' get me with, Captain.”

“Yeah, I'm sure I will. Well, just Fluttershy to check up on now, see you later.”

“Sergeant, why are you hiding under this bridge?” I found him there sat by the stream with his head hanging low and his eyes closed.

“I....can't do it sir. I saw her in the back garden. I.....couldn't do anything to upset her.”

“Where is she now?”

“In the house.”

“Wait here.” Shaking my head, I made my way over to the door and knocked, hearing whatever was going stop and some light steps coming to the door, and then it swung open.

“Hello? Oh Lucky, nice to see you. What's with then new clothes?”

“Huh? Oh, you're looking at the Royal Guard's newest Captain!!”

“Oh that's wonderful!!! What can I do for you, Captain??” She finished up with a giggle.

“I wish to ask you how you feel about Sergeant Streak.”

“Oh, I see. Um, I miss him. I always new he would go to join the guards, it's what he wanted. It hurt when he left without saying goodbye, and I wouldn't mind seeing him again, but I wouldn't know what to say.”

“Come with me.” I led here to the opposite bank, and then made my wear back to Streak. “Sergeant, I'm not here as your CO, I'm here as a male. What did you do?”

“I had told Fluttershy about my dreams to join the guard, and she supported me. I had applied and was waiting for a response. I received a letter the next day telling me to get to Canterlot right away. They had even sent a carriage to collect me. I had planned to come back on leave, but I was injured during training, and I was in therapy for two years. By the time I was released, I imagined that Lady Fluttershy had forgotten me, and met somepony else. When I heard you wanted guards, I jumped at the opportunity, but what if she has a special somepony all ready?”

“And what if she hasn't?”

“Then I've failed as a guard. How can I protect the princesses if I can't even talk to a mare.”

“Sergeant. Open your eyes.”

As he did, they connected with Fluttershy's, and nothing was said. Then there was a yellow and pink blur as Streak was tackled to the ground. “HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT???? I WOULD NEVER HAVE FORGOTTEN YOU!!! AND YOU HAVEN'T FAILED AS A GUARD!!!! NOW YOU ARE GOING TO COME IN TO MY HOUSE AND WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THIS!!!!!”

“What?”

“Sergeant, the Lady gave you a request. I suggest you comply with it.”

“Yes Sir.”

Now to find Berry's bar.....

Author's Note

And this is the crap I write whilst on guard.

Broken hearted colt

“Sorry Berry, but that's pretty freaking funny. I understand why you won't let them back in, but how about this. They go on probation for a week, you decide when they've had enough, and if they don't behave, then you can chuck them out. Is that fair?”

The light purple mare sighed before looking at me. “ You know, this is the table where they tried it. If it was after closing time then I might have left them to it......but it was at four o'clock in the afternoon!!! I have foals come in here with their parents after school!”

“Well, you did say they had been drinking all day. They probably thought that they were back home. What if you kept them on opposite sides of the bar?”

“From what you said, they're not going to be interested in each other anyway. Okay, we'll go with a weeks probation. But one slip up, and they're out.”

“That is all I ask, Miss Punch. Thank you for your time, I shall be on my way.”

“Can't I interest you in just one drink? You are very interesting after all.”

“Miss Punch, if I didn't know better, I would say you're trying to seduce me. Or get me drunk. Either way the effect will be the same. As it is, I must go to the spa, I have to do a physiotherapy session each day, and I don't want to miss my appointment. Plus I'm on medicine with strict instructions not to drink.”

“Seduce you? Whatever made you think that?” She said with a wink. “Enjoy your massage session. If you come out with a smile, I'll know just what to do to actually seduce you.” We both stared at each other before bursting out with laughter.

“Yeah, okay Berry. See you later.”

I had spent most of the afternoon and evening chatting with Berry. She even made me dinner. Leaving the bar, I decided to head back to the guard station to see what state of disrepair it was in, as I didn't get a proper look that morning. I was quite surprised to see the construction workers packing up all ready, and the foreman trotted up to me. “The repairs are all done sir, and we're on our way over to the library. I wouldn't go in there if I were you. The lieutenant's a bit.....upset about something.”

“As much as I'd like to leave him be, I need my men at a hundred percent. All he needs is someone to talk to. Thanks for fixing up the holes.”

He nodded and galloped off to catch the rest. Entering the station, I could hear sobbing coming from one of the rooms near the back. Pushing my way through the door, I found White Feather crying on his bed, a photo frame upside down on the floor. Picking it up, I saw a picture of him and Twilight at some carnival in somewhere that looked like Canterlot.....and they looked happy. I placed it on the side and sat down in his chair. “Tell me about that day.”

“Spike, could you kindly tell whoever is knocking on the door to go fuck themselves. We're not open this late.”

“Twilight Sparkle, if I hear such language from you again, I'll was out you mouth with soap!”

Galloping over, she threw open the door and got a shock. “Mum, dad? What are you doing here?”

“We heard you were having some colt troubles, so we came to see if we could help. Now, who is the lucky stallion?”

“Dad, he....I.....he's the lieutenant in town. Come in, we have much to talk about. Remember that field trip I went on to Manehatten with the school?” They both nodded as her father closed the door. “Well, it wasn't with the school......”

He looked up at me, and then to the picture, managing to stop himself crying and getting a smile as he remembered the event. “It was the Summer Sun Celebration in Manehatten. I had seen Twilight around the School for Gifted Unicorns a few times, and I happened to bump in to her in a bookshop. We got talking and found we liked the same things. We went on a few dates together, but she was always worried about her parents, or worse her brother, discovering us.”

He took a pause to draw in a deep breath before plunging on. “She told her parents that she was going on a 'field trip' with the school, but as it was the summer break, I think they suspected something. If that was my parents they would have followed her to make sure nothing happened. It didn't by the way, and I'm not even sure if they didn't have her followed.”

“And we grew apart because I let my studies take over. And when he showed up here like nothing had happened between us, I felt so....I've never felt such hurt before. It was worse then when he stopped talking to me.......and then the way I treated him when he tried to apologise.....”

As she began to cry, her parents pulled her in to a hug, and her mother spoke first. “Nightlight, you don't need to have words with him. I think this Captain Fire Rain will do that for us. Twilight, I know it hurts, but I think you should go talk with him. Come on, let's go to the guard station.”

Twilight managed to calm herself down and nodded. She stood up and headed towards the door. “Follow me, I'll lead the way.”

His smile disappeared and he went back to his usual stoic expression. “Anyway, we had a few good dates after that, and there were a few arguments as there are in any relationship, but we worked through them. Twilight's studies then became more intense, and we started to have study sessions in the castle. I was doing my guard training and it was hard to sneak out and see her, but I managed it. Eventually I stopped going.”

“Why did you stop going?”

“Because she became more and more obsessed with her studies. I began to feel like a glorified librarian, which is a bit ironic considering where she lives now. She never seemed to have time for me any more, and I was caught sneaking out a few times. The at the time Lieutenant Armour was not very happy, and I managed to lie to him about who I was seeing. I could have been thrown out of the guard then. Eventually it got to a point where I didn't even speak to Twilight, and I focused on my career. It's where I earned my reputation as an emotionless bastard.”

“I see. Tell me, did you love her?”

He glanced at me before picking up the picture and staring intently at it. “Yes sir.”

I saw a lavender shape flanked by two others in the door way. “Do you still love her?”

“Sir, I'd give my life for the princesses. But for Twilight......I'd give my soul.” There was a blur of motion as she ran forward and hugged him to her chest, and he slowly returned the embrace. I smiled and walked over to the door, closing it behind me and motioning the two other ponies to follow me to my office. Well, Feathers office, but mine for the moment.

“Please, have a seat. Now, I presume you are Twilight's parents?” The mare spoke first.

“Yes, we are. My name in Galaxy Sparkle, and this is my husband Nightlight Sparkle.” He just nodded at me.

“Wait a minute, does that mean Armour's full name is 'Shining Armour Sparkle'?”

“Yes it does. Why?”

“No reason ma'am. I'd just like to personally thank you for coming to town. I tried to help, but....this was beyond my abilities.”

“So did you choose him to come here?”

“No, that was Celestia. I just asked for some guards to come here, and she said she 'knew just the pony' to be in charge. She likes to play games of strategy it seems. Now I have a physio appointment to keep, and I wouldn't like to be late on my first day. Can I trust you not to kill Feather if he messes up?”

Nightlight just stared me in the eyes before posing his question. “What about hitting him?”

I stood up and opened the door, making my way outside his room and raising my voice loud enough for Feather to hear me. “You can slap him about if he hurts your daughter, but I at least want him presentable for duty.” There was a thud from the room followed by filly-like giggling. I opened the door to see a worried looking Feather sitting on his rump on the floor, and Twilight sitting on his bed covering her mouth with her hooves. “Everything okay in here?”

“Oh yes. The brave Lieutenant White Feather heard your threat.........and tried to jump out of the window.”

“Lieutenant, just what were you two doing?”

“Nothing sir!! Honest!!”

I just walked away laughing and headed back out it to town. Out side, I saw Starfyre trotting a long with something blue under his right wing.

“So Lady Dash, you managed to stop fainting around him?”

“I didn't faint. I passed out.”

“Whatever. I'd like to inform you that Berry has allowed you back to the tavern. You are on probation for a week, and she is the only one who can decide if you have too much. Any slips ups, and that's your chance over.”

“Sweet, come one Starfyre, let's go have a drink. Captain, would you like to join us?

“I have an appointment with Aloe and Lotus, other wise I would have. Oh and one more thing.”

“What's up?”

“Berry has reserved a 'special table' for you. Just wait until closing time tonight okay?” I saw her reaction and took one last jibe before walking off. “Hah, your face is redder than Mac's coat!” She just buried her head deeper in to Starfye's coat.

Starfyre just looked down at his 'date' confused. “What did he mean by that?”

Author's Note

I know it's a short one, and Twilight/Feather-centric, but I couldn't focus on any other aspects until I got this out of my head. Hopefully things will start moving again. Though it's been 12 days 'in story' since he re-awoke.

But at least you now know why Twilight had to use her shield spell on Dash and Mac, and why they weren't allowed any alcohol at Berry's.

I hope Rarity knows how to make swimming trunks.......

I just wandered around town in a daze, everything going by in blur as my mind try to comprehend what it had seen. I was so out of it I didn't see the building in front of me. Next thing I know there is a really pink face in my vision. It said something but it was out of focus, so I shook my head and looked again. “.....Lucky? Are you okay?”

“Yeah Pinkie, I'm fine. I...just had a little shock from Rarity, that's all.”

“Well come inside, we'll get you something to eat. But use the door this time, not the wall.” I followed her in to the bakery, and was surprised to see Strike still there.

“Strike, why are you here?”

“I went back this morning sir and Lieutenant Feather said you didn't leave any orders. He said to stay in town if anything came up, so I decided to come back here. Are you okay sir, you look like you've seen a ghost.”

“A ghost I could handle. Rarity wanted my opinion on something to 'help' Nova open up around her.”

Pinkie came trotting over with a fresh tray of muffins. “Oooh, I bet it was a new dress. I suppose she looked wonderful in it?”

“She looked wonderful all right Pinkie, but....it wasn't a dress.”

“Then what? Was she naked? I mean, we are most of the time, but still?”

“No she was wearing......something. It's just......there wasn't much of it.”

“I don't understand. Was she wearing something or not?” Strike leaned over to Pinkie, who's eyes went wide with his descriptions. She suddenly tore out the door without so much as a goodbye, and we both looked at the empty space for a moment before Strike spoke.

“So....how are the others doing?”

“I've got Bolt and Granny Smith talking, so hopefully that's sorted. I haven't seen Starfyre since yesterday evening. Sergeant Legstrong seemed to be fine with AJ. Lieutenant Feather and Lady Sparkle are now on more than speaking terms. She stayed over in his room last night.” I saw his grinning features looking at me from across the table and shook my head. “Nothing happened. It didn't help his chances that her parents stayed the night as well. They just watched a movie together.”

“Yeah, from the back row I bet. What about Jet?”

“Sergeant Streak and Lady Fluttershy are doing fine.”

“Sir, you are hiding something. What happened?”

“He's a stallion, and she's not much of a Lady.”

“You mean they...” He didn't have time to continue as Pinkie raced back in and set a bag on the floor. She walked right up to Strike and did something I would never have thought I'd see Pinkie Pie do. She started to smile seductively at him and leant close, then she began to whisper, but loud enough for me to hear.

“When you're ready, I'll be waiting for you upstairs.” She pulled him close and kissed him, before turning around and grabbing the bag then heading upstairs, hip swinging more pronounced as she walked. I watched Strike follow her with his eyes, and just like Feather, his horn started to glow.

“Well, Corporal, lets get back to work shall we.” He turned towards me, his eyes filled with pleading, knowing he was on to a sure thing and that I was the only obstacle that he had. “Ponyville's not going to protect itself you know.”

He looked down at the table top and his horn stopped glowing. “Yes sir. We need to start planning patrol routes and....”

“Strike.”

“Yes sir?”

“I'm just messing with you.” He looked up at me and saw the grin on my face. He almost fell out of the booth in his haste to get upstairs, just as the Cakes were coming out of the kitchen, the foals with them. “Good afternoon guys. Do you have anything planned today?”

“Afternoon Captain, nice to see you again. And no, it's Sunday. We were actually about to close up, but seeing as you're still here.....” He was interrupted by a blue unicorn stallion rushing down the stairs and over to me, horn glowing brightly. His cuite mark was a lightning bolt hitting a target.

“Sir, I know we need to get set up with patrols and the like but can I please have the rest of the day off?”

“Planning and meetings are a Monday morning thing.”

“Thank you sir.”

Mr Cake just stood there dumbfounded at the appearance of the strange unicorn from inside his house. “Excuse me, but who exactly are you and what are you.....” He was again interrupted, but by a female voice from upstairs, speaking in a sing song tone.

“Stri-ke, come back up-stairs.” He just looked to the owner who nodded his head, and then the blue unicorn was gone again.

“When I asked if you had anything planned, I was going to suggest you take the foals out for a nice leisurely stroll.” They looked at each other before Cup Cake reached for their foal carrying saddle thing.

“That sounds like a good idea, would you like to join us?” I looked at the map I had been given and saw the lake was around an hour away. I glanced at my watch and the time was just coming up to thirteen hundred.

“No thank you. I'm off to the lake for a swim.” We all made a hasty exit at a thud from upstairs.

Arriving at the lake, I was quite pleased to see that Aloe, or Lotus, was indeed correct and it was deserted. This left little chance of me scarring any foals that could be here. Walking over to a bush, I gave on last look around before stripping off. I'd have to go to the hospital to get my bandages changed, but treatment was free for Royal Guards throughout Equestria. Walking down to the edge, I sat on a rock and eased my legs in.

The water was cool, but warm at the same time. It was understandable if it was still summer, as the heat from the sun would keep it warm, and any breeze would cool it down. I slid myself in and began to float around on my back like I had been told to do.

After a couple of hours I started to feel sore, and I knew that it was time to get out. Swimming over to where I got in, I laid out on the rock to let the sun dry me off. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, and soon I had drifted off along with the peace and quiet that was present every where nearby.

I got in to that semi awake state where everything is just out of focus and you body is restarting. I could hear voices around me, but at a distance. “Okay there he is. I told you he was down here.” It's okay, they're just looking.

“He looks so weird. Look at those 'hands' of his.” My hands?

“I bet they give a good massage.” Go ask Rainbow Dash.

“Yeah, we heard you mother wants one from him.” Mother?....oh no.

“What my mother does is none of your business Diamond Tiara.”......fuck!

“Just look at him. Why anypony would want to have a friend like him is beyond me. I heard his species doesn't even get cutie marks. What kind of life would that be, not knowing what you're good at?” Wow, she really is a bitch.

“You mean like your cutie mark entitles you to be bucking snob when you haven't actually done anything to earn it?” Okay, somepony knows the truth.....

“That's it, you're going down!” Should I stop this?

“Hey, you leave Ruby alone! Nopony invited y'all anyhow, so why don't you and Silver Snob get lost?” Applebloom. Great, now AJ is going to kill me.

“You can't tell me what to do!! I'll just tell my daddy to stop buying from you, and then you won't even have a home. It's bad enough that you don't have a cutie mark.....let alone parents.” Okay enough is enough.

I sat up and opened my eyes. Just along the shore from my rock was a sand bank and that is where the colts and fillies had gathered. Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon and a couple of others stood starring down Applebloom, Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and I'm guessing Ruby. I felt something around my waist so I had a quick glance down. I had a towel wrapped round me with a note attached to it.

As much as we enjoyed the show,
the school is kicking out now,
so we made you semi-decent,

Aloe & Lotus

They've been here.....whilst I was naked? I'll talk to them about that later, got something much more important to do. I stood up and the fillies hadn't seen me yet. I walked around the bushes, picking my pistol up on the way and coming up behind Diamond Tiara and her friends. I saw Applebloom sniffing, and Scootaloo raised her head to make her look at me. She started to smile instantly, and Diamond Tiara took another jibe. “Why are you smiling about that? It's not very nice, they're probably turning in their graves at their pitiful filly right now.”

“Perhaps I should remove your parents from this world, and see how you turn out. Would you like me to do that?”

The fillies all turned round and looked up at me and then screamed before running off. I'd deal with the fallout later, if at all. I turned my attention to the one who had tears in her eyes and sat down in front of her. “Hey Applebloom, you okay?”

She just let out a wail as she jumped in to my arms and started sobbing. Her friends all looked on worried, and we all gave a start as a voice sounded from beside us. “Lucky, jus' what do ya think ya doin' with mah sister?”

I turned and looked over to the mare with an angry face, before setting Applebloom back down and nudging her towards her friends. “AJ, this isn't what it looks like. We need to talk, and it's more than likely going to drag up some bad memories. I'll understand if you don't want to.” She just nodded and motioned towards my clothes.

Ten minutes later and we were sat on a bench watching the children play. “So, what did ya want to talk about?”

“The colts and fillies must have come down after school. I was awoken by them talking, but then an argument broke out, and one called Diamond Tiara said something to Applebloom that should never have left her mouth........”

“What did she say?”

“I.....don't think you want to know.”

“Lucky....you'd best be telling me what that filly said, or Ah'm going to have to get Celestia involved.”

“She said that if Applebloom didn't shut up, then she'd tell her father to stop buying from you, making you loose your house.” I sighed knowing that this was going to make Applejack extremely angry.

“Well, come on, out with it. I ain't got no patience when it comes t' that family.”

“She said it was bad enough not having a cuite mark........or parents....”

“SHE WHAT??? What else, I can tell there's more!!!”

“When I walked over, Applebloom started to smile, and Diamond Tiara thought it was to her and she said.........that your parents were turning in their graves at their pitiful filly....and that's when I spoke.”

“What did you say to them?”

“I may be in trouble with Celestia for this one....”

“What. Did. You. Say?”

“I kind of threatened to......remove her parents to see how she would like it.”

“Oh Lucky......you didn't....”

“Yeah, so much for 'Captain Fire Rain'. Now it's going to be 'human prisoner'.”

“I don't think that will be necessary.” I jumped up and turned around, shocked at who was there. I instantly brought myself to attention and saluted as Applejack bowed to the ground.

“Princess Celestia ma'am. I was not expecting you.”

“At ease Captain. I am here on something of a whim, due to my latest letter from Twilight. I saw what just happened.”

“Yes ma'am.”

“I am glad you showed restraint. If I wasn't a princess, I would have bucked that filly myself, especially today, of all days.”

Applejack got up with tears in her eyes. “Thank you, yer highness. It is always a pleasure to see you, like you say, today of all days.”

“I don't mean to be rude, but what's so special about today?” I had my suspicions, but I chose to find out all the facts first.

“Captain, gather the guard. Have them meet us at Sweet Apple Acres at six o'clock. They are to be in their dress uniform. Do not worry, you have one as well. It has been delivered to the guard station.”

“Yes Ma'am.”

It was ten to six when we walked through the entrance to the farm. Celestia was joined by Luna, Cadence, Shining Armour and the other six Captains. All of the Bearers had come along as well, making me realise that this was an important thing. A blur of red movement caught my eye, and I walked over to Mac, who was stood with Shining Armour. Mac was in a partial tuxedo, whilst Armour was in his dress uniform, the same one from his wedding. I was wearing the same, but fitted out for my size and shape, with my modified insignia on the sleeves. Mac began to speak, and I could hear the emotions hidden behind it.

“Ah'd just like to thank you both for coming. Ah know Celestia asked yer both, but still the whole family appreciates yer efforts.”

I just looked on confused whilst Armour replied. “Macintosh, he was my Captain. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here today. I would have come even without the request of the princesses.”

“Ah know you would Glowy, and I happy you would do that.”

“Look guys, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but what is going on? And 'Glowy'?”

Mac looked over to the other ponies, mostly the mares and then turned his attention to me. I had a feeling the guards all ready knew. “I met Glowy here in Canterlot around fifteen years ago. It was when we were doing our guard training. Ah had to quit to come help with the farm when Granny got to old. AJ wasn't old enough to help around properly. Mah father was our Captain at the time, held the same position as Glowy.”

“What happened?”

I could see Mac almost at the breaking point, and so could Armour, so he continued instead. “They think it was a rouge Griffon group, and their government denies all knowledge or involvement. It doesn't matter now. There was an attempt on Celestia's life. The assassin managed to get all the way to her chambers and was about to strike, but Captain Swift Kicker managed to get there just in time. The strike missed Celestia.......and caught him instead. The assassin was thrown out of the window on fire.”

“Mac, I'm sorry, I didn't realise....I didn't mean to sound like a jerk....”

“It's okay. Mah father did his duty an' paid the ultimate sacrifice. Any of us would. That was five years ago to the day. Mah mother followed a few months later, she jus' couldn't cope any more. It's why me an' AJ had to help Granny raise Applebloom. And why we always appreciate it when the Princesses or the guards come along.” He looked back over to the group and saw them moving off. “It's time, come on”.

I had followed the others at a distance to a large apple tree standing alone. There were two headstones there, the final resting place of the Apple siblings parents. Words were said by everypony present, and I watched in awe at the amount of raw respect their father had, mainly from Celestia. As she finished up, I realised I hadn't said anything, and that was not right to me.

“Everypony? I know I'm the outsider here, but I was wondering if I may be permitted to say a few words?”

Mac nodded in my direction and pointed a hoof towards the graves. I walked up to them and reached in to my pocket....and the pocket sized bible they issued me in basic. I remembered the Padre's joke about it. Keep it in you left breast pocket, that way if they are aiming for your heart, it will stop the bullet. You need to use it for something! I had never been the religious type, but there is one prayer that I know is normally held dear to soldiers, especially those in dire situations. I turned to the correct page and cleared my throat, then began speaking.

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul:
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name' sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil: For thou art with me;
Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies;
Thou annointest my head with oil; My cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever.

Amen

Author's Note

Have my take on what happened to their parents. Remember when Scootaloo was talking to Cannon Bolt and she said 'Mac could hold his own'? Yep, I had a reason for it.

Would you believe I was almost in tears writing the last part of this chapter?

The Big Pony Apple

I was sat around the table with the other captains and Mac, listening to some of the stories about Swift Kicker and his attempts to impress Celestia, in the hopes of....well you know. It had continued until he met Ida Red when she was visiting Canterlot one weekend. He saw her at a dance on a Friday night.....then shirked his duty over the weekend to find her. He ended up with a month of KP duty, but had always said it was worth it. Mac reached up above the fire place and pulled down a picture frame, handing it to me. Or is that hoofing?

It was a picture of a hospital room, and there were six ponies in it. A teenage Mac and AJ stood to the side next to Granny Smith and a baby Applebloom was being held by her mother. On the other side of the bed was a stallion much larger than Mac now, wearing a guard captain uniform, and I had no doubt's that he was probably the strongest stallion alive, which he has more than likely passed on to Mac.

Turns out AJ was a spitting image of her mother, except she has green eyes, and her mother had deep blue ones and her mane was a deep red. Placed on her head was the Stetson currently hanging up by the door. So much for it being her fathers. I passed the picture back to Mac, who just sat there staring at it. A minute later and Applebloom had jumped in to his lap and was looking at the picture with him.

I felt a tap on my should and turned to meet Twilight's gaze. “Would you please speak with me?” I nodded and we walked out on to the back porch, where we found a bench to sit on. “That was beautiful what you said back there. Where did it come from?”

I pulled out the bible from my pocket and passed it to her. “This is the holy script of my religion. I've never been much for it, but we all need some sort of belief. You put down in your book that I seemed to have a high set of morals, and most of them come from that book indirectly.”

“You see my religion, Christianity, is split. There are those who follow that book almost to the letter, and those who are more liberal about it. My father is from the liberals, and my mother from the others. Her family sent her to a church school, so she had to learn about it, whether she wanted to or not. My father was a soldier himself, so my mother was left to bring me and my brother up by herself most of the time. She taught me right from wrong to the best of her abilities.”

“She sounds like a wonderful pony...er, person.”

“She is. I haven't really thought about it much, but I miss her. I've been away from home for far longer, but I always had a way back.....”

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring that up. I'm sure we'll find away."

"Lady Sparkle, do not worry about it. If I can't return home at some point, at least I have found a world worth defending."

"What about your father?”

“My dad? Heh, he's an asshole. But he's MY asshole. We may not always see eye to eye, but something seemed to click when I joined up. We still clash, but it's mainly over which service is the better, Army, or Air Force.”

“And what of you brother? Is he like you?”

“No, he's almost the opposite of me. Self centred, arrogant, ignorant...the list goes on. We didn't speak much due to some events back home. I won't bore you with the details, but it got so bad that I trust complete strangers more than him. Be glad he did not turn up here.”

“Why is that? We may have been able to help him.”

“The first time you saw me, what did you do?”

“I put a shield around you to protect us....and you. Not that it helped.”

“Did you see me point my weapon at you?”

“You pointed....your weapon at me?”

“I was preparing to defend myself. If you had attacked my with any kind of magic, then neither of us would be here today. There is the difference between me and my brother. He would have shot you without a second thought as soon as your horn started to glow.”

“Coming out of FTL flight in five......four......three......two......one. Shutting down ship drives. Opening cooling vents. Engines?”

“Engines cooling. Currently at seven thousand degrees Celsius, and falling. Navigation?”

“Checking galactic co-ordinates and cross referencing with star charts. Done. Position is half way between Sol and the Horsehead Nebula, just as predicted. Reorientating....course corrected. Destination is laid in for the Rosetta Nebula. Ready to go when the engines have cooled. Weapons?”

“Weapons are still offline, can be powered up in thirty seconds if we need them. Not likely, but we are travelling in a faster than light spaceship from Halo to a planet with freaking talking horses on it, so yeah....anyway, status report complete sir.”

“Thank you Daniel for that oh so colourful commentary. Well, we've got around twenty hours before the engines are cool enough for another jump. We'll take four hour watches, the rest can get some sleep. Daniel, you can take first watch. The rest of you, get your heads down.”

“Yes sir.”

“How can there be such a difference between siblings?”

“I don't know. My mother keeps trying to work out where she went wrong, but I always sat the her 'if you raised us wrong, then how come I'm not the same?'”

“If you don't mind me asking, how are you not the same?”

“That little thing we have called choice. I saw what kind of person my brother was from an early age, and I chose not to be like that.”

“Do you have any children?”

“Kids? Me, no I haven't. My brothers got one, with possibly two others but we're not sure. And I wouldn't trade my niece for the world. You're her favourite you know?”

“What do you mean 'favourite'?”

“Remember when I told you that you were stories in my world? Well they took the myths and made a kid show about them. It started about two years ago......and it's mainly about you and you friends.”

“Did you say........two years ago?”

“Yes I did, why.......” I didn't have time to ask as Twilight ran back inside leaving me on the bench. A moment later, Shining Armour and the other six had me surrounded. “Gentlecolts. How may I help you?”

“I'm sorry, but we're going to have to ask you to surrender your weapons, and then follow us back to castle.”

“May I ask why?”

“Celestia had a glimpse of your world during Nightmare Moon's return, and she was disturbed by the amount of hatred coming from you world for one another. It may have happened the other way and others on your world saw our existence.”

“And if I refuse?”

“Then we shall do what's necessary.”

“I see. Well then, it appears we have a problem.” I was preparing to run when Spike came sprinting over the hill and headed straight to Shining Armour. He handed him a letter which he then showed to me.

Canterlot Castle,
Changelings attacking
Holding them off, but they
have reinforcements. Not everypony
is fighting. Some are just standing
there! Please, send help!!
We are going to lose the city!!

Private Bright Spark
Manehatten Guard.

“You still want to arrest me?”

“I have my orders. We didn't realise that was your world at the time, but Princess Celestia decreed that anyone from your world arriving here would be detained.”

“And you're just going to throw my skill set away when you need it most?”

“No, Captain Fire Rain, I am not.” Celestia walked out of the farmhouse. “You are not like most of your world. I can sense some hatred from you, but it is not for others of your kind. It is for those that deserve and escape justice. I know the doctor has not signed you back to active duty, but we need you now. Gather your squad, a train leaves for Manehatten in an hour.”

“What about my gear?”

“It has been delivered to the guard station. And our magicologists have managed to do something that might help. If they are right, you will never have to 'reload' again.”

“Yes ma'am. We'll take back the city.”

“Captain Armour, head back to Canterlot and gather all available guards, then head to Manehatten. Show no mercy. I shall remain here with the Elements.”

“It will be done your majesty.”

We both turned and ran, him straight towards the station with the others, and after getting the others, me towards the guard station.

We stepped off the train around ten miles from Manehatten. Something had destroyed the tracks so we couldn't just ride in anyway. I put the squad in to a rough arrowhead formation and we started marching, a purpose and destination in mind.

As we crested a hilltop, we all came to a stop. The entire city was covered in a black substance, and you could make out where buildings were, but not what they looked like. “We're too late. My home....it belongs to the Changelings.”

“Corporal Starfyre, are you still alive?”

“Yes sir.”

“And do you still have blood pumping through your veins?”

“Yes sir.”

“Then until you don't, the Changelings haven't won anything. Do you know why?”

“No sir, I don't.”

“Because we have something to fight for. It is not for ourselves. It is not for our friends and family. It is for those ponies, strangers, trapped inside. WE MUST SUCCEED FOR THEIR SAKE. AND UNTIL I FEEL THE LAST OF MY BREATH ESCAPING ME, I WILL FIGHT. WILL YOU?”

They all looked at each other and then came to attention. “SIR, YES SIR!!”

“Good, now lets see if I can find us a way in.” I unslung my sniper rifle and looked over the valley between us and the city. There was a river bed in along it that led right up to the walls. “Starfyre, what exactly is your talent? When you helped me in Canterlot, you started to glow.”

“When I get fast enough, the air around me starts to displace. Violently.”

“Good, I want you, Cannon Bolt and Jet Streak running distraction through the air. If you see a Changeling, I don't want you to hesitate, understand?”

“Yes sir.”

“Good. The rest of us will use the river bed as cover and get right up to the wall. If there isn't a way in, Hammer, you make us a way in. The rest will head to the centre, that's where the one in charge will be. Any questions?”

“No sir.”

“Good, lets move out.” I left the sniper on the ridge to show we had been there and took a L85 with me. These egghead ponies had given me a magazine covered in runes, which was linked to a feeder system back in Canterlot, I had one for each weapon. The only thing that would stop me firing now is when it overheated. They had also managed to salvage my HUD from my busted GSR. It had been trimmed down and smoothed off. It now hung over my right eye and when paired with my helmet, it looked like the one the marines had in the first Halo. And all the software was still working, which would be handy if I had to fire from the hip.

We made good time to the city wall as the pegasi provided us with a good distraction. Streak and Bolt would get the Changelings attention and then lead them towards Starfyre, who would fly at them. When the air around him exploded, the sky was full of falling Changelings. We could tell that where we were there should have been a gateway in, but it was covered in that black substance.

I had Hammer buck part of the wall, and he managed to make a hole big enough for us to go through. I went in first rifle ready for any signs of trouble. It was empty inside, but the whole scene was......eerily familiar.

I looked at the passages and saw that they were quite small, which was not a good thing for us. “Hammer, Feather, return to the hilltop and await the reinforcements.”

“But sir....”

“Look at these tunnels, do you think you can fit down them.....quietly?!

“.....no sir.”

“Then get back and take command of the next batch of troops. Use my authority if you have to, but if we fail, then it will be up to you.”

“Yes sir.”

“Strike, Nova, let's move.” We started down one of the tunnels that led straight to the city centre. “Nova, what's you talent? I've got a guess, but I need to hear it.”

“I can create small supernovas, the biggest can wipe this city off the map.”

“Can you tune it to a specific species?”

“Yes sir, I can. And I scanned a Changeling during their invasion of Canterlot.”

“When we get to the centre, you start charging it up. Me and Strike will cover you. Until then, no more talking, we're going to need all of our senses.” They both nodded and we continued on our way.

Two hours later and we had made it to the centre of the city. If it was a normal day, then this would have been a wide open space, but the Changeling structure covered everything, and even had a roof over the top. We managed to get so far with only one minor incident. Whilst walking along I stood on a Changeling and it started to wake. Putting my weight down crushed it's neck, so it didn't have time to call for help. It was then that we noticed the Changelings asleep in the walls and got extra careful.

In the centre of what would have been their equivalent of Central Park stood a thirty foot monolith, which had a weird blue glow to it. We approached cautiously until I made out something inside it at the bottom. There was a blue unicorn mare with a two tone grey mane. Her cutie mark was a moon and wand and her horn was glowing. Trixie. But why is she helping Changelings? Her eyes shot open and connected with mine.

“Help......me......”

This must have been how they took the city, used her illusion magic to trick the ponies and then struck. No wonder they weren't fighting back. I tried to pry some of the black substance away, but with no success. I tried time and time again with the same effect. I looked in to Trixie's face with shame....I couldn't save her. Strike nudged me from the side and pointed to my rifle. I looked at it and then back to Trixie. She just closed her eyes and nodded.

I raised it up and took aim, clicking the safety off. “Nova, how long?”

“Five minutes max sir.”

“Strike, you think you can keep it up that long?”

“Yes sir.”

“Nova, start summoning.” I turned back to Trixie who had reopened her eyes whilst waiting. “I'm sorry.” I don't know if she heard me, but she just shut her eyes and nodded again. I squeezed the trigger.

We saw the effects right away, the monolith stopped glowing, and the walls took on a angry droning and looked like they were moving. I looked around and saw black swarms heading towards us. “Here they come. Strike, keep attacking as long as you can.”

“Yes sir.” I switched my rifle to automatic and began firing.

Shining Armour had managed to gather over five hundred soldiers and ex soldiers. When the news spread, even those discharged for injury in duty had answered the call. At first he refused, but they would not leave, so they all headed down to the train station and headed out. Now just cresting a hill top in full battle armour, they came across the humans weapon, abandoned in the grass. Hushed whispering started until on voice spoke louder than the others.

“Look at Manehatten.....do you think the Changelings left anything of them?”

“Soldier, you have not seen Captain Fire Rain in action. If they attacked him, this hill would be slick with blood. They are still alive.”

“You're correct Captain Armour.” They all turned their attention to the unicorn and earth pony coming up the hill from the city's side.

“Lieutenant Feather. Where is everypony else?”

“Starfyre, Jet Streak and Cannon Bolt are in the air taking out all Changelings they can.” A few explosions sounded and they saw flashes in the sky. “And doing a very good job of it. Strike, Nova and Captain Rain went inside to take out the leader.”

There were three thuds as the pegasi landed, and Streak spoke up. “Look, they're all heading back, And I can see why.” They looked to the sky above Manehatten and to what appeared to be a small sun, growing larger every second. “They're going back to stop whoever that is.”

“I hope Captain Rain is a lucky as we think, he's going to need it.”

Shining Armour looked at the gathered soldiers on the hill. “Remember what Celestia said, No Mercy!!! If any Changelings try to escape, shut them down. If the ball disappears, then we will move in. Until then, get some rest.”

“Sir, there's too many of them. We can't keep this up!” We had backed up to a wall so that we could funnel them in to our attacks.

“If you die in here Strike, I'm going to kill you!!! We need to do this!!” The barrel of my rifle was glowing hot, and it was affecting my aim. Not that it mattered, I had fired hundreds of rounds at thousands of targets and not one missed. But more Changelings kept coming. All of a sudden I was knocked over from the side and swarmed by them, but a blue blur swung across me and knocked them back, before they all fell over from multiple sword wounds.

The rest fell back and started to circle us, occasionally probing our defences. A female voice sounded from above and behind us. “Hello boys. Do you need a hoof?” Looking up, I saw a teal mare standing on her hind legs on top of the wall, one hoof in front of the other, her wings on full display, and attached to her forelegs were gauntlets that had swords on them. “Swift Gale, at your service Captain.”

“Nova, how long?”

“Just another minute sir.”

“Swift Gale, we need to keep them away from him for a minute. Can you help?”

“Of course sir.” With that, she took off in to the swarms in a blur and Changelings started to drop in droves.

“Strike, concentrate on the ones on the ground!”

“Yes sir.”

“Captain Armour, how does the battle fare?”

“Princess Luna, I thought you were staying with the Bearers?”

“That is my sister, not me. Hence why I am in my battle dress.” As Armour looked over her, he spotted a sword sheathed through a belt around her middle. “Now the battle, when will it be joined?”

“It depends on whether that ball of fire in the sky disappears or......” He trailed off as it started to descend, slowly at first but gaining speed.

“The fools!! We sent them to save the city, not destroy it!!!!”

They watched in shock as it impacted the ground, sending out a light that was too bright to look at and a pressure wave that knocked over any unsuspecting pony on the hill. When they could open their eyes again, the Changeling structure still stood.....but it was getting smaller and the Manehatten skyline soon came in to view.

“They did it. I don't know how, but they did it!!”

Author's Note

Fucking Changelings.....

Swift Gale belongs to KnightmareKnight

Lucky's Seven

The soldiers and Princess Luna walked through the dissolving Changeling structure, and were quite surprised to not only see no bodies, but ponies coming out of their buildings and heading towards the centre of the city. The followed along until it opened out in to the park, where the crowds had parted and allowed them to continue unhindered. They followed the makeshift path to a fountain, and saw a blue unicorn breathing heavily with a bandage wrapped around her chest.

There was the fluttering of wings as a teal pegasus hit the floor, and she stowed her sword gauntlets in her wings before bowing down. “Princess Luna, it is an honour to meet you. My name is Swift Gale.”

Shining Armour took notice of the name. “Swift Gale? As in the Solar Guard Swift Gale, the only pony for decades to successfully use two swords in battle?”

She stood up from her bow and looked to him. “Captain Armour, a pleasure to see you as well, although you are quite late.”

“Where is Captain Fire Rain?”

“Come, I'll show you.” They followed her around the wall and found two unicorns and a human, all slumped against it. Their armour was dented and they were covered in green blood. In each of their grips was a brown bottle. They looked up at the gathered party and the Captain spoke.

“Ma'am, mission accomplished.”

“Captain, are you drinking alcohol?”

“Yes ma'am I am. Didn't take my medicine today so......want one?”

“......you're buying.”

“Wouldn't have it any other way ma'am.”

The celebrations lasted long in to the night, but I didn't join in with them. After a few hours, I made my way to the hospital along with Strike and Nova to get checked out. Gale hadn't even been hit.

I was told to take it easy for the next few days, they even threatened to sedate me if I refused. They did let me walk around though, and it was then that I found myself walking to the room that had two guards outside it. I just nodded to them and walked in.

The sight that greeted me was a pitiful one. Trixie looked underfed and haggard, she was hooked up to various machines and she had a tube going in to her mouth. If she had been a prisoner of the Changelings, then it was a good thing that we stopped them here when we did. For some unknown reason I started to stroke her mane, and her eyes fluttered open.

“Hey there. How you feeling?” She just closed her eyes and started to cry. “It's okay, you're safe now. You're in the Manehatten hospital." I made to leave, but her hoof shot out and stopped me. I could see by the look in her eyes that she didn't want to be alone. “Okay, I'll stay with you.”

I was awoken by a hoof prodding me in the shoulder. “Hey! If you're going to stay with me, then you could at least be awake at the same time!” I just opened my eyes and looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “I'm sorry. What I meant to say was......thank you. For saving me.” Trixie not saying 'Trixie'? That must have been a bad experience!

“It's all right, I was just doing my job. I am Captain...”

“Fire Rain. I know. I have been talking to a mutual friend.” She pointed her hoof over to a couch in the room, and asleep on it was Twilight Sparkle. “She has told me all about you. Everything. She even showed me some pictures.”

“She what? She said they were for science......”

“They are. The main science university is here in Manehatten. She is going to take them there later today.”

“So do you want to talk about what happened, or would you prefer Twilight to be awake?”

“Actually, I was wondering if you could get the princesses to come.....they need to hear what I have to say.” I nodded and got up, walking out of the room and taking the elevator down to the lobby. Shining Armour was sat there waiting.

“Lucky, how are you feeling?”

“Depends on whether you're here as a team mate......or here to arrest me.”

“I...apologise for my actions. When Twilight told us that it was your world Celestia saw, I was thinking about what was best for Equestria. I now know that it is with you, not against you, Captain.”

“In that case I feel like shit. I feel dizzy.”

“Uh, are you going to be okay?”

A doctor came trotting over. “He had some blood loss, and blood is pretty important, and he's bound to have some side effects like dizziness, or nausea, or sensitivity to light....”

“I think I'm going to stop standing up now.”

'THUD'

“Or passing out.”

“You mean like that?”

“Yeah like that.”

“My body is trying to die. Armour, Trixie wants to see the princesses. She has information.”

“I'll go get Luna. You, get back in to bed.

"Nah...I'm fine here"

“They took Manehatten as a staging ground. This was less then a quarter of their full force.”

“And how did you come by this information?” Princess Luna and Twilight were recording everything Trixie was saying before deciding on a plan of action.

“After my last......trip in to Ponyville, I gave up on trying to best Twilight at everything, and focused on beating her at what I'm good at. Illusion magic. I came here to restart my stage show, using real magic instead of just tricks. There was a rather tasty stallion that came every night, and would always sit in the front row, centre seat. After a couple of months, I invited him backstage. We shared a drink, but I don't remember the rest of the night. When I awoke the next day, I was staring at....myself.”

“They impersonate ponies so that we don't know when they are going to strike. No offence, by why would they impersonate you? If they can't perform your shows, then you would no longer....want to be seen by ponies. Oh.”

“Precisely. They starved me and forced me to use my magic to convince ponies that the Changelings weren't there. They weren't just going to impersonate them, they wanted to be completely hidden. I tried to fight it, but the hunger won out and I gave in....that's when they put me in that thing and dumped me in the park. The spell was magnified and they started to move in. I couldn't stop my magic from working, and I could see the guards fighting overwhelming odds. There was one trying to get away with a letter, but they stopped him.....I managed to spare some magic and send it to Canterlot.”

Twilight got up and walked over to the bed. “Trixie....you saved Manehatten. If it wasn't for you, then we would never have gotten that note. You are a hero, Trixie.”

Luna continued the questioning. “But how do you know of their strength?”

“They had taken me back to the hive. It was somewhere in the Badlands, and it went deep in to the ground. I remember when I was being moved to that thing I saw a central shaft, and it was thousands of hooves deep. And it's size was much more than that of Manehatten. There were thousands here, there must be millions in the hive.”

“Twilight Sparkle stay here. I must speak to my sister.”

“Yes, your majesty.”

I was stood in the place of honour along side my squad in the park. The mayor was giving a speech thanking us for our efforts, but I had long since zoned out. At the edge of the platform was Trixie in a wheelchair, trying to hide herself away. I nodded to Twilight who walked over to her and smiled. Trixie started to recoil, until Twilight walked up behind her and started pushing her towards the centre stage, next to me. “Trixie, you need to relax. It wasn't your fault, and from what Luna tells me you deserve to be here instead of us.”

She just smiled at me before looking out at the gathered ponies. The park was full, I couldn't make out a single piece of grass. The first rows of seats were taken up by the princesses and a few of the officials from Manehatten. I turned my attention back to the mayor as he finished up. “...and now, in honour of their actions, and to remind us of their help, I present this statue.” His horn started to glow and the massive white sheet was removed, revealing said statue.

In the centre was a massive ball of what looked like fire. Underneath it with a sphere around his horn was Nova Fusion, Trixie lying on the ground next to him, and Hammer Legstrong was holding it up. Heh, looks like Atlas. In the air in front of it was Swift Gale, in the same position as when I first saw her. Starfyre, Cannon Bolt and Jet Streak were spread evenly around the sphere protecting it with their wings.

At the front, rearing up on to their hind hooves with spheres around their horns and facing the sides was White Feather and Lightning Strike. And right at the front, rifle in left arm and saluting with the right in the direction of Canterlot, was me. It was to scale for the size of me to the ponies, but it was massive. I stood about twenty feet tall. The scale of what we had accomplished finally dawned on me as the thunderous stomping set in. We hadn't just saved a few fillies or a princess, but an entire city.

And we did it with just one injured human and eight ponies. I walked over to the plaque and inspected what it said.

THE MAGE, THE SOLAR GUARD
AND LUCKY'S SEVEN

THEY SAVED THE CITY WITH NO
CONCERN FOR THEIR LIVES, WE
SHALL FOREVER OWE THEM OUR THANKS

“Lucky's seven, huh?” I turned back to the stage and saw the mayor motioning me to the microphone. I nodded to Twilight who replied in kind as I took the podium.

“Fillies and Gentlecolts, I thank you for this. But I'd like to say something about somepony else. I know a few of you probably blame her, but if it was not for her actions, then we would never have got here in time. You call us hero's, but we are just soldiers who did our job. The real hero...” I looked to Twilight who helped Trixie to her feet and led her over. “.....is Trixie Lulamoon.”

The stomping set in slowly at first, growing in decibels before it became deafening. There was a shout that stopped all applause as a red unicorn stallion walked down the centre path. “It's all lies!! She's a Changeling!!! You should be arresting her!!” I had seen her blood, I knew she wasn't a Changeling. I looked down at her and she was shaking really hard.

“Trixie, are you okay?”

She closed her eyes and began to whisper. “That's him. That's the stallion from the theatre.” She may have been whispering, but the microphone had picked it up, and sent it around the park. I saw movement out of the corner of my eye, and looking up I saw guards moving in to position.

And I was still a Guard Captain. “Get him.”

I entered the guard station and headed down in to the cells. The stallion wasn't a Changeling, a blood test had confirmed that, but we still needed to find out what he knew. “So, a Changeling spy? What did they promise you?”

“I'm not a spy.”

“Really? Then why do we have confirmation from the theatre that you purchased a front row centre seat ticket every night that Trixie had a show on?”

“Because......she's.....really.....well before I found out she was a Changeling.”

“What makes you think she's a Changeling?”

“I saw her changing. Before the rest got here. I saw her true form.”

“Somehow I don't believe you, and I have no qualms about getting information.....anyway possible.”

“You're a guard captain!! You are bound by the laws of Equestria! You can't do anything and you know it.”

“Hmm, that's true. Wait here a moment.” I got up and walked outside, closing the door behind me. “Strike, Nova, you may not want to be present for this. I don't want you two linked to this in anyway. Go for a coffee break.”

“Yes sir.”

“Oh, and take my jacket with you.” I walked back in to the cell and sat down opposite the stallion. “Well, now I'm not a captain. I am a very pissed off human. And I'm pissed off because you upset one of my friends. She refuses to even go to the toilet alone because of you. How do you think that makes me feel?”

“GUARDS!!! HELP!!!”

“They won't help you.”

“Why not?”

“Because they aren't there. Now.” I stood up and walked round beside him. “I want information. And you're going to give it to me. The easy way, or the hard way, you can choose. Why did you go and see Trixie's show each night?”

He stood up and looked me in the face for the first time. “BECAUSE I LOVE HER!!!!!” Sinking back down, he hung his head. “Or, at least I did till I saw her change. That was after I missed her last show.”

“Wait, you missed a show? Why?”

“I...had met another mare at the theatre. She said she had noticed me there a few times and she asked me out for a drink. I remember taking her to a fancy restaurant, but I don't remember much else after that......”

“If I could prove to you this Trixie wasn't a Changeling, would you still love her?”

“I'd do anything to have the real Trixie back. Even if she didn't want me.”

“Trixie isn't a Changeling. For a start when we got here she asked for help.”

“Did you perform the blood test on her as well?”

“Didn't need to.”

“Why not?”

“I shot her. It was the only way to stop her magic. Technically, Trixie is dead.”

“But she was with you this morning!! How?”

“A little thing called training. On my world we try to bring them back if it is not their time. It wasn't Trixie's time.”

“I want to see her.”

“You sure that's a good idea?”

“No, it's probably a bad idea. But I still want to see her.”

“Good.”

Author's Note

I need a Chapter title!!!!!

Well, I wasn't expecting that.......

“No, what are you doing here? Guards!! Help!!” I pushed my way in to the room, past the shocked stallion.

“Trixie, calm down. He's not a Changeling.”

“Then who is he? Who was the last pony to talk to me?”

“That was a Changeling, but they got to him as well.” I said, pointing at the stallion.

“But he....I.....what?” I sat down in the chair and told her what I had found out. I left a few details out, that was for them to decide on their own. I left a couple of guards inside the room just in case and headed out of the hospital towards the station. Along the way I had been joined by another.

“Do you think they'll be all right?” Looking to my right, I saw it was Luna.

“I don't know ma'am, only time can tell, Right now I just want to rest. And I'm certainly not drinking again for a while.”

“That is good to hear. We have arranged lodgings for you in Ponyville, I am sure you will find them acceptable.”

“As much as I appreciate it, I'd rather stay with my squad.” She just started giggling at me then, and adopted a coy smile.

“They had a room each at a hotel here in the city, and so did the Bearers. When I went to check on them this morning, six of the beds had not been used. Do you know why?”

I had a flash of memory of yellow mixed with pink frills and white mixed with purple lace. “I.....don't really want to know ma'am. What they do is their business until it affects their duties.”

“I'm glad you feel that way, as they will likely not be staying at the guard station much longer. Come, they are waiting for us at the station.”

“What do you mean you haven't found anything?”

“I'm sorry your majesty, but all recon flights in to the Badlands have come back negative. There is no sign of a Changeling hive.”

“A whole month wasted!!!!” Luna paced around the room, clearly agitated by the news. She looked over at the Lieutenant and something seemed.....off about him. “Tell me lieutenant, why is a unicorn delivering this news, and not the Captain of the Pegasi?”

“I....well....um, you see.....” He didn't have time to continue as Luna rammed a hoof in to his jaw and sent him sprawling to the floor. Her suspicions were confirmed as he spat out green blood. “I see there is no fooling you any longer.” The air in front of him shimmered as he showed his true form. A Changeling.

“I must say I'm impressed. That you managed to make it this far is quite commendable. Now tell me where your hive is, and I shall end you wretched life quickly.”

“My 'hive' your highness, is not in the Badlands. Chrysalis isn't my queen.”

“So she is still behind the attacks. Wait, did you just say she isn't your queen?”

“That I did. My mission was to infiltrate the castle and see if you had located it yet. What she is doing is ruining our lives. Some of us more then others.”

“First off, where is the real lieutenant?”

“More than likely still drunk. A bag of bits and a disguise of yourself, and he thought he had a month of vacation.”

“He is still alive?”

“For now. He may die of alcohol poisoning, but that's not my fault.”

“I see. Now, why is Chrysalis ruining your lives, and more so, why should I care?”

“You see this ring around my horn? I'm married.”

“That is enough to ruin your life anyway. Pray tell, what kind of sick minded creature would marry a Changeling?”

“One of you sick minded pony subjects.”

“You lie!”

“Do I? Perhaps you should see this then.” The Changeling reached in to a section of it's armour that had pockets in and brought out a piece of paper, which he floated over to Luna. She took it in her magic and pulled it to her face.

“I....I don't understand.....who is this?”

“That is my wife, and that is the day of our wedding.”

“But you look like...”

“I do now? That is because my wife loves me.”

“How does she not fall ill?”

“Because it is love given freely. When given to us by choice, it does not harm the one it comes from. When taken by force, the 'lover', for lack of a better term, becomes sick. It is also weaker. When given to us, it is stronger.”

“How long has this place lived like this?”

“For at least a hundred years.”

“I see. So then, who is your queen?”

“I have no queen, my 'hive' as you call it has a equal number of male and female Changelings.”

“That is not possible, all Changelings live in a hive, and you all have a queen. Now tell me, before I truly get angry, who is the one who holds dominion over you?" As she said this Celestia walked in and took the room at a glance. Before she could take any action, the Changeling did something neither of the could have anticipated ever happening. It bowed.

“The ones who hold dominion of me and my kin, is you and your sister, my princess.”

“Luna, what the buck is going on in here?”

“I am unsure. He claims not to be one of Chrysalis' horde. I am not sure what to do with him.” The Changeling looked from one princess to the other, hoping that it wouldn't be anything bad. “Pray tell, do you have a name?”

“My wife calls me.....'Pokey'.”

“'Pokey?'” “WIFE?” Luna just floated the photo to her sister and carried on the conversation. “Why does she call you Pokey?”

“This is so embarrassing, but.......'Pokey holes'.” Luna just stared at him a moment longer before bursting out with laughter. However Celestia couldn't look any more confused.

“This shows you married to a pony, and you say that we are you rulers, yet I do not know of this location.”

“It is just beyond the Equestrian border. The ponies are all Equestrian citizens, but they choose to keep our existence a secret after.........certain events.”

“And why would they do that? Protect Changelings?”

“Your majesty, this is going to sound weird, and I wish there was a way to prove it, but I am not pure Changeling. My mother was a pegasus.”

“Your mother was a pony? How long has this place existed?” By now Luna had recovered.....mainly.

“'Pokey' here says it has been that way for around a hundred years.”

“A hundred years.......does this mean that you are from.....Prancesylvania?”

“Yes your majesty, that is where I live.”

“Celestia, you know of this place?”

“It was taken from us in a skirmish with the Griffons. I thought we got all of our ponies out of there before they moved in........”

“You did, but some of the ponies wanted their homes back. They came across a travelling Changeling, and they discovered that he could help get the city back, and it would be free, as Changelings feed on love. This Changeling was part of a rebel group at the time, and he managed to get some of them to help. The night before the battle they joined in a party with the ponies, and the love flowed freely, shall we say. Fifty Changelings marched on Prancesylvania the next day, against hundreds of Griffons. I don't know how many were slain, but when the ponies re-entered the city, fifty Changelings still stood. If it was not for the love given the night before, the battle may very well have gone the other way.”

He used his magic to pull the picture back to him and put it back in his pocket. “They tolerated one another for a time, until at some point the love became real. It has been that way ever since. My wife and I are, in fact, expecting our first foal. Whether Changeling or pony, it will be loved the same. I just hope I can be there to see it.”

“I don't mean to sound rude, but how can a Changeling love, if that is what you eat?”

“We are still capable of feeling emotions. When word reached us about the events in Canterlot, there was much worry that the ponies were going to come for us. Some of them tried to, but it was the others who stopped them, my wife included. And now with the attack on Manehatten, our way of life is threatened again, and I will do whatever it takes to ensure its safety.”

“I wish to speak to my sister about this. I am not allowing you to leave the castle, but I am not holding you prisoner. I shall have some guards escort you to a guest room. Please do not try to escape.”

“I would not do anything that may leave my unborn child without a father, my princess.” Pokey then bowed to the ground again. Celestia stuck her head out of the door and he was soon being escorted through the castle by no less then ten guards, all ready should he attempt something.

Celestia and Luna watched him go peacefully with curiosity. “So sister, Prancesylvania. Why was it the Changelings who had to retake the city?”

“You know I was never much for war Luna. By the time I had gathered enough forces, the ponies of the time had all ready abandoned the city. It falls within Griffin territory now, although I now know why they never tried to get us to negotiate for its return.”

“You believe him?”

“Did you hear the sincerity in his voice when talking about 'his' wife?”

“Yes I did. But still, I am unsure whether he speaks the truth, and I know our ways will not get him to reveal any more information.”

“I know. We may need to use methods from another world. Luna, gather the Captains. All of them.”

“Twilight, have you see Lucky?”

Twilight looked up from the book she was reading to her assistant. “No Spike, I haven't, is it something important?”

“I've got a letter here for him from Princess Luna.” He waved the scroll around for emphasis.

“What does it say?”

“I don't know, it's one of those sealed ones that can only be opened by the recipient.”

“Oh. I think they are out planning patrol routes. Why don't you put it on his desk in the guard station?”

“I may just do that. One other thing.....I was wondering if I could get the afternoon off.” He avoided eye contact with her, causing her to grow suspicious.

“Spike, what are you hiding?”

“N-n-n-nothing!” The last time he stammered his way through a lie was when she caught him eating all of her favourite ice cream.

“Spike.....are you seeing a filly?”

“Not quite.....” ...........and now he's hoping from foot to foot.

“You're going to tell me before I say yes....”

“Well, there's somepony in town, but I can't say who, and they've got an assistant with them......that happens to be a dragon......about the same age as me.”

“Why won't you say who the pony is?”

“They want it to be a surprise. You won't have to wait long to find out.”

“Okay, fine. Yes, you can have the afternoon off to spend with your new friend.”

“Yeah, friend.....”

“Spike, is it.....a....girl dragon?”

“........maybe.”

He suddenly found himself pulled in to a rib crushing hug. “Oh Spike, I'm so happy for you!!!!”

We got back to the guard station around two in the afternoon. It had been an eventful day. I had finally been given the all clear by the docs, so I started to get back in to doing my morning exercises, to which I was joined by the rest of the squad. My normally short run had turned in to an endurance race, and the only one to beat me was Hammer. Streak, unsurprisingly, got disqualified for cheating. It was meant to be a run, not a flight.

During the afternoon we were sorting out patrol routes and timings around town. Sitting down at my desk, I noticed a scroll on top of it with the royal seal. Feather came trotting in as I opened it and I began to read it out.

“Captain Fire Rain,
Return to Canterlot Castle at your earliest opportunity, and with haste.
We have some recent developments the we need to discuss with you.
We only require you, the rest can stay in Ponyville.

Princess Luna.”

“Sounds important sir.”

“Yeah. Keep an extra eye out on the town, I got the feeling that these 'recent developments' are going to be quite big. What time is the next express to Canterlot?”

“It leaves in about twenty minutes.”

“Okay, you're in charge till I get back. And make sure I got a town to come back to.”

“Yes sir.”

I left the guard station and got my ticket, then boarded the train. It was still a few hours away, so I made myself comfortable and closed my eyes.

The other captains were all ready in the main hall when I arrived, and they had placed their weapons by the door. I unslung my rifle and rested it against the wall, but kept my pistol. The others ushered me over to where they were sitting, and had an empty chair for me. Armour spoke up first. “Before you ask, no we don't know why we are here. One of the corridors leading to a guest room has been closed off to everypony, except the princesses. That has never happened before.”

“So what about us, are we allowed down there?”

“No, the guards are under Celestia's direct orders. They aren't even allowed to tell me why it's closed off, and.....”

He trailed off as Celestia and Luna walked in, their faces burrowed in concentration. They just took to their thrones and looked to the door way. “Bring him in.” A group of guards came in surrounding something, but none of us could see what it was. They reached the bottom of the dais and spread apart, revealing a bowing figure, which then stood up.

I was a blur of motion as I ran up and knocked it to the ground. Drawing my pistol, I placed it between it's eyes. “Give me one good reason. One good reason not to put a bullet in your head.”

“Captain Fire Rain.”

I didn't look up from the Changeling whilst responding. “Yes your majesty?”

“Stand down. Do not treat our guest in such away.”

I stood back from the Changeling and looked to Celestia. “Guest? I never had anyone call a bug that needs squashing a 'guest'.”

The Changeling on the floor had stood back up and looked at me. “Heh, a 'bug that needs squashing'. That's a new one. I'll be sure to tell my child that one.”

“The only reason you're still alive is because they stopped me. Don't push it bug.”

Luna got off her throne and walked between us, shielding it with her wing. “Captain, his name is Pokey, not 'bug'.”

“Did you just say.....'Pokey'?”

“Yes I did, why?”

“Because now I'm going to let him live. That name is punishment enough for Manehatten.”

“I was not present in Manehatten. I was at home......with my wife.”

“Okay, forgive my breech of protocol, but Luna, Celestia, you owe us a pretty fucking decent explanation.”

Celestia stood as well and joined her sister in shielding Pokey from us. “And you shall have it.......”

Author's Note

And you all thought I was going to go on a Changeling hunt, right?

The night before the bug hunt.

“So, why should I believe you?” I was sat in the Changelings guest room, and he had told me everything he told Luna and Celestia. I would have preferred the dungeon, but Celestia said no. She also said I couldn't hurt him. She didn't say anything about intimidating him though.

“I didn't say you should. I just told you the truth. It is up to you whether you believe me or not.”

“If you want me to believe you, then why don't you tell me your real name?”

“Because Pokey is my name. I had it legally changed by the mayor of Prancesylvania after I got married. You ask around there for Pokey and you'll get pointed in my direction.”

“I see. How did you meet your wife?”

“In school. I was always sweet on her, and then at the graduation dance......her date tried to take something that wasn't his...yet.”

“And what happened?”

“It was the first time I spent a night in a jail cell. But it was worth it.”

“The first time?”

“Yes, I have been in twice. The second time was for everypony else’s safety.”

“Why, what did you do?”

“A few years after the graduation, the stallion returned. We were dating at the time, and he assaulted her in front of everypony. I stepped in to stop him, to try and calm him down, but he just started to fight harder. I.....used too much magic. I.....killed.....him. I was taken to the cells to await my trial, but I was released the next day.”

“Why did they release you? What you are saying is you murdered him. Your chances aren't looking any better.”

“Because there were so many eyewitness to the event, one of them was the mayor. They petitioned the council to free me, even the ones that didn't know me. They saw I just tried to defend myself and my love..... but I still need to answer for his death.”

“Wait here.” I got up from my seat and walked out in to the corridor. The princesses and the Bearers were waiting for me. “Applejack?”

“He's telling the truth. Ah didn't even get a whiff of a lie....and there was regret about that stallion. He really does want to repay his debt fer that.”

“Celestia, Luna, what do we do about that?”

“What would you do as a last resort if one pony was attacking another?”

“As a last resort? I'd take their life, but only if I had no other options. There isn't always another way.”

“True, and he did say he used to much magic. It was an accident. I do not think we need do anything about it now. What is your recommendation, Captain?”

“Let him go. He isn't a threat, and he's got a kid on the way. I'm not about to take away a childs father.”

“That is very noble of you captain.”

“I want to speak with him some more. See if I can't get his help finding the hive.”

“Very well, but remember not to injure him.”

“Don't worry ma'am, I won't touch him.” I re-entered the room and took my seat opposite him again. “So, you've admitted to killing an Equestrian citizen. Do you know what the penalty is for that?”

“No.”

“I'm afraid the penalty is death. But, if you were to help me, I may be able to get you life instead.”

“But what would my child think? How would me wife cope with me alive but no longer able to be with her. I'll help you, and I'll also accept the full punishment.”

“Are you sure that is what you want?”

“I would rather my child grows up without a father then with one who can not see them. I understand you can't find the hive. It is because you are looking from the air, have the scouts fly about a hundred hooves off the ground, they should be able to find it then.”

“Thank you. Now are you sure you want to go through with this?”

“No.....but it must be done.”

“Very well, follow me.” I got up and walked to the door, turning to see he was following. I opened the door and just winked to the shocked faces of the princesses, before ordering some guards to surround him. We started marching towards the main entrance of the castle.

“Uh, Captain?”

“Yes?”

“Is the execution....public?”

“Not usually, but the crowds heard we had a Changeling, and they want blood for Manehatten. I know you weren't there, but do you think these ponies will listen?”

“No. Very well. Lets get this over.” I nodded and pushed the door open, the midday sun blinding those that hadn't prepared. The guards shoved Pokey out of the door and walked back in. After a moment he opened his eyes and looked around, seeing the gardens empty. “I don't understand....”

“Pokey, go home to your wife.”

“What?”

“I'm sorry, but I needed information, and that was the easiest way. Both the princesses and myself agree that you acted in self defence and defence of another. You have a child on the way, make sure you bring them up right.” I nodded to the two pegasi guards who had swooped down behind him. “These gentlecolts will escort you, and ensure no harm comes to you.”

“What if they just said they would and they're going to kill me anyway?”

“Why don't you ask them where their families come from?” I just smiled and closed the door. I could hear one of the guards talking.

“I've always want to see Prancesylvania, my grandfather always tells stories of it. Sir, could you please show us our home?”

I heard three sets of wings start to beat as they flew away. “Captain.”

“Ma'am.”

“Why did you just release a Changeling?” I thought it would be Celestia or Luna coming to chide me for what I did to him, but on turning around I came face to face with a concerned Cadence and a very pissed of Shining Armour.

“Well, my wife asked you a question. Are you going to answer it, captain?”

“Because he isn't one of Chrysalis' Changelings. He comes from the north.”

“HE WAS STILL A CHANGELING!!”

“Yes, a Changeling with a pegasus mother, married to a pony, and expecting their first foal together.”

“I don't understand. How?”

“Ask Celestia about Prancesylvania, she'll explain everything. But how did you two know?”

“Cadence felt a sudden rush of love, and we came here to find it. It was coming from that Changeling.”

“He was probably thinking about his wife. I kind of gave him the impression he was on his way to be executed.”

I saw the disapproving look from Cadence as she posed her question. “Why would you do such a thing?”

“I broke a Changeling's wings and horn off for information, Celestia told me I couldn't hurt this one, so I had to resort to other measures.”

“CAPTAIN FIRE RAIN! REPORT TO OUR CHAMBERS IMMEDIATELY!!!!”

“And now I'm going to get my ass handed to me. Nice knowing you two, and I hope you have a wonderful life together.”

“....and so that's the dimensions of it. We are going to need a lot of ponies to take it down.”

The recon scouts had found the Hive, and it was massive. They had managed to get a few good pictures as well. There was a long path, heading in to a shallow crater, right in to the structure. It was also a good kill zone.

“And another thing, they don't guard it during the day, only at night. And it wasn't all that strange black stuff. There were massive plates of metal, and we found construction going on on top. They were using metal for support, then building it up with the black stuff.”

I was sat in the corner with 'The Seven's', as we had become known. We had even adopted a squad 'symbol', a seven leafed clover. Most ponies, including the guards, gave us a wide birth. They were scared of us. There had been skirmishes on the borders for years, but a few soldiers taking on overwhelming odds? That hadn't happened in Equestria for centuries.

“Captain Fire Rain?” I snapped my head up to the lunar princess, once again dressed in her battle clothes.

“Ma'am?”

“What do you think?”

“I'm beginning to wish we had a nuke.”

“Pray tell, what is a 'nuke'?”

“Remember how Nova hit Manehatten?”

“Yes, it was truly an amazing accomplishment.”

“Yes it was. A nuke is like that, but it doesn't differentiate between buildings or living things. It destroys them all. And it has a blast radius about twenty times larger than Manehatten. If we had one of those, that hive would just be a black spot on the ground by now.”

“Sir, I have a suggestion.”

“What is it Nova?”

“I can channel that spell in to an object, and turn it in to a bomb. Problem is, I can't use a specific type. If I do that, then it won't just kill the Changelings. Anything with the blast radius will likely not survive.”

Celestia came in at that moment. “Are we really considering this. Wiping out a species so that ours is not longer threatened?”

“Princess Celestia, we will not be wiping out a species. I'm sure Prancesylvania isn't the only pony-changeling colony. If they can do it, there must be more. But this hive must be taken out. If not, they may strike again, and this time you may not be so lucky.”

“Very well, what is the plan?”

“Nova, how long will it take you to make a spell bomb big enough to take out that structure?”

“Three days, with no interruptions. It would take less, but I will need to rest occasionally.”

“Find somewhere secluded and then start channelling. Let me know when it's done.”

“Yes sir.” I watched him walk out of the the door, wondering if he was ready to do what we need to.

“Captain, what are you planning?”

“I'll take my squad and infiltrate that hive. We'll get to the centre, start the bomb, and then high tail it out of there before it goes off.”

“That is a bad plan.”

“Yes it is, but that's why it's going to work. Good plans never work.” But something always goes wrong anyway.

It had been four days. Nova had finished making the bomb. Celestia was still sceptical that this was the right course of action. Morally, she was right, but it needed to be done. I waited in the castle armoury until the last pony arrived just outside. I ushered them all in and closed the door.

“Sir, why are we meeting down here?”

“Because I don't want others to hear this. This mission we are going on.....there is a very good chance we may not be coming back. I offer you this time now to back out. I'd rather carry that bomb in there myself than put you in any unnecessary danger.” I got up and walked to the door, opening it again. “If any of you want out, now is you chance.”

They looked between each other before Jet Streak stood and walked my way. I though it would be him. I wouldn't blame them all if they left. To my surprise, he stopped next to me, looking out of the door way, and then shut the door......still inside the armoury. “Sir, I think you should know by now that we won't let you do something like this alone. It is our duty to do this, and if we don't come back..... then it was an honour knowing you.” He brought himself to attention, and the other slowly stood and did the same.

“Thank you everypony. I'll do my best to make sure you all get back. We leave on the next full moon, that gives us four days. You have two days to make any arrangements you need to, whether with family, friends or business. On day three, I want to see you here at the castle.”

They all responded at the same time. “YES SIR!”

The first two days came and went quickly. I had spent the time making sure the bullet feeder systems were completely stocked up with all of the ammo and that my gear was serviceable. I had given Celestia my sniper rifle to display where ever she wanted to, saying that it wouldn't do much good inside the structure. I had the magicologists set up two 5.56 feeds and spread the ammo out evenly. I was going to be taking my pistol, the M4, and a L85. It sounds like a lot, but when you don't have to lug ammo, it's not that much.

I watched my squad arriving at lunch time on the third day, and I knew from the looks on their faces where they would rather be. By the evening they wouldn't mind. Not if my little surprise went well. They spent the afternoon training, Hammer bucking everything in sight, the pegasi practicing aerial combat, and the unicorns their offensive magic. They were as ready as they could ever be.

We were seated in the main hall, a long table had been put in there for a feast in our honour before we left. The squad were confused as to why they had to sit on the other side from Cannon Bolt, and why their had to be a gap between the stallions opposite her. They were all in their dress uniforms, which meant that instead of white and grey, I had a group of multi coloured ponies before me. Before I allowed them to take their seats, I had them line up by the door, the stallions on the right and Bolt on the left. Telling them to close their eyes, which they did unquestioningly, I opened the door and allowed the first guest in.

He was wearing his old dress uniform, and it made him even more imposing. He walked up to Bolt and pulled out a rose. I didn't tell him to do that. What a cheesy guy...stallion. He then spoke to her, in his country voice, and bowing low. “Evenin' Miss Bolt, would you care t' join me for dinner?” She opened her eyes, and seeing Mac before her, wrapped her fore hooves around his neck. “Ah guess that's a 'yes' then.”

The stallions had opened their eyes by now, but they weren't watching the display, as the Bearers had entered the hall, wearing the same stunning dresses from the unveiling of my window. I knew exactly what was going through their minds at the time. “Guys, if you don't stop starring, you're going to make the Ladies embarrassed.”

“Hey! Who you calling a lady?” Before I could respond, Starfyre stepped out from the line.

“I believe he was referring to you and your friends, Lady Dash. Would you do me the honour of dining with me tonight?” I had to work hard to keep a straight face at Rainbows expression, waiting for her to 'pass out' at any minute. However, she caught my look and smiled smugly at me.

“Sir Starfyre, I would like nothing more than to dine with you this fine evening. Please, lead the way.”

What? Who the fuck was that and where the fuck is Rainbow Dash?

One by one, they paired off and sat opposite their respective partners, my squad shooting me glances mixed with 'thank you for this' and 'you're a bastard, we'll get you for this'.

The meal went well, much better than I had expected. It appeared that all the ponies in the room really did love their partners. After the meal I had arranged for some entertainment, at which I head Dash groan as Octavia appeared on the stage, slowly being raised by a lift system as she struck a few chords with a slight beat to it. Dash's face lit up when she heard the first bits of bass sound out, and Vinyl Scratch appeared behind the opening curtains.

The stallions all approached the mares and offered their hooves, to which Dash was the first one to accept. Yep, that is a big 'fuck you' directed at me. Well played Dash. Whilst I was watching I felt a tap on my shoulder, and I turned to see Luna next to me. “Will the Captain dance with his Princess?”

Normally, I'd say something like 'I don't dance, how about a drink instead?' or 'how about some horizontal dancing?', but it's not everyday that you are asked to dance with a princess. I don't care if she is a pony. FUCK YOU, she's a fucking princess!!! “It would be an honour, you majesty.” We took the dance floor as Octavia and Vinyl began the next song. Now, I'm not much of a dancer, but even I can get lost in the music sometimes. And something about that night felt right.

As the song ended and we finished the dance, I noticed that we were the only ones moving. I glanced up in time to see a camera flash in our direction. Bastards. They must have known. Otherwise how could they plan this? The only ones that knew were the Elements, Mac, the staff and the princesses. Oh, no......Trollestia has finally struck. Glancing in her direction, I saw she was still sitting down, but she had fucking creepy smile on her face and a hoof raised to her mouth. I saw movement out of the corner of my eye and looked to Luna who raised her head up to mine. “Something wrong Captain?”

“Nothing at all your majesty.” What happened next, I think it is safe to say, no one or pony was expecting. Never kiss a horse. Hey, I was pissed. Told you me and my mates did stupid things whilst drinking. But this was different. It was like kissing a human, even though I know our faces were different shapes. It was also......nice.

Author's Note

Things are happening now!!! What a find as well, the first song being called 'Elements'!!!

Also was it cruel for me to do that to Pokey?
Here, have some ponies in boxes to make up for it.

You locate a bug hole..............

Ugh, my head feels like it's about to fall off. At least these covers are soft. Interesting colours too, a mix of white and blue....oh you have got to be shitting me...... and yep, I'm naked. “Well good morning Captain. How are you feeling?”

I raised my head up, and got quite the shock. Lying on the couch in the room was Octavia. “So, Luna and Celestia huh? You little devil. Normally I'd be annoyed with you, but two princesses are better than one classical musician.”

“What?”

“Well, they are in your bed.”

“Nothing happened......I think. And why would you be annoyed with me?”

“You promised me a massage after the show using those hands of yours. Or did you forget?”

"I may have forgotten. Sorry about that."

"That's okay. You can do it now." Her expression suddenly shifted to one that had me very worried. “Well come on then, I understand that you don't have all day. Might as well get it out of the way.”

“.....fine.”

Luna awoke to find herself tangled in another's hooves, and the sound of a mare moaning caused her to open her eyes. When she saw who was in bed with her, she yelped and moved backwards, falling out and hitting the floor. “Good morning princess. Why don't you get in line for a massaaaaaaahhhh........”

Luna looked up at the sofa where Octavia was lying.....with Captain Fire Rain straddling her back, and running his hands over her muscles. Naked. “Morning ma'am.”

“Captain. Where are we?”

“It looks like.....my room when I stayed here.”

“And why are we in this room?”

“I was hoping you could tell me......”

“Ugh.....Luna will you keep it down.....”

“Looks like your sister is going to have to cut in line.”

“...............Or you could do us both together.”

“Good Morning Lieutenant!”

“What, are you the bucking weatherpony now?”

“Sir?” Jet Streak just looked at White Feather confused. He thought they were getting along after the past month and a half.

“Sorry Streak....I didn't get much sleep last night.”

“You're not the only one it seems. Some are still awake.”

“What do you mean?” Streak just grinned and turned around, heading towards the captains room. When they got there, Feather noticed all the male guards plus Big Mac and Shining Armour we listening in at the door. They motioned him to be quite and waved him over, and that's when he heard the moaning.

There was some muffled talk before they heard a female voice. “And why are we in this room?”

The next voice was that of the captain. “I was hoping you could tell me......”

“Ugh.....Luna will you keep it down.....”

“Looks like your sister is going to have to cut in line.”

“...............Or you could do us both together.” They couldn't believe what they were hearing, and they had to stop each other laughing by hold another's muzzle. Just as they had about calmed down, a purple blur walked passed the hallway, before returning and looking at the stallions.

“What the buck are you doing?” As she had asked this quite loudly, the moaning stopped and the door whipped open. The captain stood there with no clothes on, looking very unamused at the guards.

"Leave. Now." The stallions fell over themselves trying to get away. The captain caught Twilight's gaze and knew who she could see on the bed. Her just flashed her a creepy smile and closed the door slowly.

All Twilight could do is reiterate what Luna's 'alter ego' said to her when they first met. "You're kidding. You're kidding, right?"

“Lucky!!!!” I saw a orange blur flying through the air at me, and had just enough time to get some good footing before it slammed in to me. Even then, I was still almost knocked to the floor. Looking down, I saw a smiling orange filly looking up at me......whilst hovering in the air.

“Scootaloo? Are you......flying?”

“Yeah!!! Mum and dad have been teaching me, and now I can fly!!” I watched as she started to do some acrobatics through the air, as her parent landed next to me. They looked to their daughter and smiled warmly.

“It wouldn't have been possible without you, you know.” Turning my attention to Spitfire, I gave her a confused look.

“What do you mean?”

“If you hadn't have come here, then they would still be with those Diamond Dogs....any my little angel would be......the doctors said if you didn't arrive.....from the blood loss....”

“Spitfire. You are the ones that taught her to fly, not me. It couldn't have been possible without you.” Now, contrary to popular believe, her mane is not made of fire, as I found out from the crushing hug I was given a moment later.

“Ew, mum cut it out!! That's just gross!! So Lucky, are you going to be sticking around now?”

“Sorry Scoots, we're just passing through today. We got a job to do.....and it can't wait.”

“What's the job? Is it dangerous?”

“It's very dangerous. We're heading in to the badlands to deal with some very bad creatures. But we'll be back in no time, you just wait and see.” I was pulled aside by Rapidfire and led away from the others.

“What are you not telling her?” I could see in his face he all ready knew what I was going to say but he needed to hear me say it.

“We're going after the Changelings responsible for Manehatten.....and we may not be coming back. I'd go on my own, but they refused to let me. If we don't do this......then they may attack again, and they may not be stopped next time.”

“I see. When will you be leaving?”

“I've got two more fillies to see....and then we start off. We'll spend the night in Appleloosa, there's a rail line that heads south through the badlands. They always run it during the day, because the night ones were getting attacked. We'll get the early morning one, so that we can travel safely during the day. We'll rest at night.”

“Now, where is that little filly? I'm feeling quite hungry!!” I had spent the last ten minutes playing 'stop the nasty human from eating the filly'. Somewhere hidden in Carousel Boutique's workroom was Sweetie Belle, and every time I got close, Rarity would use her magic to move me to the other side of the room, facing the wall, giving Sweetie Belle a chance to hide. Knowing I couldn't spend too much time here, I feigned going right and dove to the left, catching something soft from under a pile of fabric.

“NOOOOOOOOOO!”

I lifted Sweetie Belle up by one of her rear legs and dangled her in front of me. “Well, you knew the rules, and I caught you. Means I get a decent meal before I leave!!”

“Leave? What do you mean, 'leave'.?” I set her down, and sat on a couch, patting the seat next to me. Instead Sweetie Belle jumped in to my lap.

“I've got an important mission to go on. I don't know how long it is going to take, but it needs to be done.”

“You're coming back though, right?” I glanced up at Rarity, who had turned away at this. “Lucky?”

“Yeah....I'm coming back. We all are. Can I speak to Rarity for a minute alone?”

“Er, sure.” She hoped down from my lap and scrambled upstairs.

“Rarity?” She turned to look at me, and I saw tears in her eyes.

“What if one of you doesn't come back? What if you all come back, but not a...as you are now?” I know who she's thinking of.

“Rarity, I give you my word that Nova will come back alive. I'll make sure of it.”

“I....I wasn't just concerned about Nova. I meant all of you.”

“They'll all come back. You'll see, give it a week and they'll be back.”

“And.....what of you?” Ah, there's the kicker.

“Can't have a Lucky's Seven without a Lucky, can you?”

“Just....be careful. You've become one of us, even if you still feel like you don't belong.”

“Ah don't care. You ain't going.”

“Applebloom, can you please untie me?” I was restrained against one of the support beams in the barn. All I had said to her was that we were heading south for a bit. Before I could react she had a bit of rope in her mouth and started to sprint around me and the pole.

“No, Ah ain't untyin' ya. You can jus' stay there until you say you ain't goin'.” The little filly just turned her back to me and sat down, starring out of the barn. I'm going to have to tell her why we need to go.

“Applebloom?” I saw her ears twitch and I carried on. “We're going to the Badlands, to stop the Changelings. You heard about Manehatten right?”

She turned around and I could see tear streaks down her face. “Yeah, Ah heard. Y'all went in there and saved it. But why you got to go find more o' those creepy bugs?”

“We're are going to find them. And then I'm going to do what I did to those Diamond Dogs.”

“But why?”

“Because the force that attacked Manehatten was tiny. Our intel, which is reliable, says that there could be millions of them in the Hive. When, not if, they attack again, we may not be able to stop them. That is why we have to do this.”

Slowly, she stood and started to undo the knots. After tugging at some of the ropes, I could move again. “Jus' make sure y'all come back ya hear! Ah'm gonna be mighty mad with you if you don't!”

“And upset one of my favourite fillies? Wouldn't dream of it.” I picked her up and gave her a hug before exiting the barn. Waiting outside were the Seven. “Are you guys ready?” Seven nods. “Then lets move.” Without another word, we headed to the station and boarded the train. Our destination...the Changeling Hive.

We had made good time. It took us almost two days to reach the hive, and we had arrived before the sun went down. Hastily digging a pit, we covered it over with a tarpaulin and cover it in what little vegetation was around. Feather had planned well, and the tarp was sandy coloured already, so we settled in for the night, the drone of the first Changeling patrols' wings actually quite peaceful. They wouldn't stay like that for long.

I was awoken by a hoof to my shoulder, and bright light hurting my vision. “Sir, it's dawn. The Changelings are returning to the hive.” Rolling over, I watched the last few black objects in the sky disappear.

“Nova, you sure that bomb of yours is big enough?” The unicorn scrutinised the structure in front of us.

“Yes sir. If we can get it below ground, that should keep the blast contained a little.” I looked to what amounted to be the main entrance and noticed the the path seemed to go under the structure.

“There that's our way in. Bolt, Streak, Starfyre, I don't know how much space we'll have, but we'll deal with that as the time comes. Hammer, is the bomb secure?”

He looked to his back and knocked it with his hoof. It didn't move. “Yes sir.”

“Okay, is everypony ready?”

They looked around at each other before Feather spoke up. “We're ready....to do what ever it takes.”

“Let's move.”

(A bit of music to set the scene.)

Making it in was easy. Just like Manehatten, the Changelings were asleep on the walls. We managed to get through to the central chamber, and it was huge. It made the Boeing Factory in Washington look like a corner shop, but most of it was down. Even with my low light filters, I don't think I could see half way. Spotting a throne in the centre, I though that was as good a place as any to drop our present. Working our way over, we put it behind the throne, and I set it to ready.

That's when it happened. A bright red flash streaked across my vision....and impacted a Changeling about to attack me. I looked to the squad and noticed the pegasi were ready to take of, Hammer tensing his legs, and the unicorns horns were glowing. Then I heard the droning. It was a thousand times louder than Manehatten, the sound echoing around the room. There was only one thing left to do.

“RUN!”

And we did, sprinting out of the chamber and firing behind us, whilst Hammer and the pegasi cleared the way. We managed to make it to an intersection, but weren't sure which way was the exit. I noticed that one the the paths had slight incline to it, meaning that it was more than likely the way out.

I was about to point the way when bolts of green magic hit me from the other tunnel. I looked at my chest, and saw that the protection runes had done their job, and we were all now covered in twice as many, just for this mission. I raised my rifle and returned the fire.

Then I heard Nova speak. “Sir, we have a problem.”

“Sir, we have a problem.”

“What is it Nova? I'm a little busy here!!!” The captain continued shooting down the tunnel, keeping the Changelings back.

“I can't feel the bomb, they must have a magic dampening field around the main chamber.”

“Does it have a manual trigger?”

“Yes sir.” They watched as he shot some of the Changeling structure, causing it to weaken and a large metal plate to fall, blocking off the adjoining tunnel and the perusing Changelings.

“Get out of here. I'll go hit the trigger and then run like a turkey at Thanksgiving.”

“You won't have long, it's a short timer!”

“It'll be fine.”

White Feather gripped the captains arm in his foreleg. “Sir, we can't let you do that!!”

“I am giving you an order, and you all have mares, and a stallion, to get back to. Now follow it!”

Feather looked at the captain and went to refuse, but couldn't find the strength to argue. “Yes.......sir. It's been an honour.”

I watched as they all saluted and then took off running. Turning back the other way, I started to sprint for the bomb......and the thousands of Changelings in the middle. I managed to get there with no trouble. The human with the gun turning and running back towards them must have made them scared. Approaching the bomb, I saw the switch, and went to arm it when it suddenly went quiet. Even the buzzing of the Changelings wings had stopped. And that's when I saw her.

Taller than any other Changeling, she just oozed confidence and the skill to back it up. No doubt this was the Queen of the Hive. Chrysalis. “So, the noble hunter comes back in to the den? What kind of fool are you?” As her horn glowed green, I saw the tunnels doing the same. Then with loud thuds they were closed over, blocking off any escape. “So, any last words before I have my subjects rip you to shreds.”

“Yeah.” She looked at me eagerly as I just took off my HUD and smiled. “You see a bug hole....” I pressed the button. “........you nuke it.”

The ponies had all reached the hill and had made it to where they had slept the night before. Turning around, White Feather kept his eyes on the entrance, looking for any sign of the captain. There was a bright flash, visible through small holes in the structure, and an overpowering pressure wave which sent them tumbling down the other side of the hill. They impacted rocks, trees, and anything else that wouldn't move for them. Finally coming to a rest, Feather gathered his strength and stood, glancing around the the squad. They were all sprawled on the ground with cuts and bruises, but breathing, so they were alive.

He could feel the call of unconsciousness calling him, but he pushed through it and made his way back up the hill, which was significantly shorter now. Cresting the apex, he had hoped to see any hint of the captain. What greeted him before his vision finally faded was a massive crater, and the sand all around it was cracked and blackened.

Sorry guys.

I know it says complete, but I couldn't focus on the next
story until I got this out of my head. I hope you like it.

This is the effects of one too many a can o' Guinness, known as the Ruby Gold.

It has finally arrived.

I've finally done it. The side story/ sequel is up!!!

.....well, submitted, you'll just have to wait for it to be approved!!

Lucky's Seven: The Changeling hunters

Sneak preview: The Changeling Hunters.

Lucky's Seven:
The Changeling Hunters

His vision slowly returned to him, and so did his senses. The first was pain, and the second was his hearing. “...tenant White Feather, can you hear me?” He looked around and saw Nova Fusion standing above him, horn glowing white with healing magic. “Try not to move around too much, you've got a broken leg and three broken ribs. Help will be arriving soon.” He looked in the opposite direction and saw a teal pegasus, twin swords sheathed in her wings. Closing his eyes, he let the blackness take over again as the pegasus took wing and flew to the north.......

Author's Note

It's going to be a side story, not a direct sequel, but set between the last two chapters. It's going to be a while before it's up.
I likely do the same as I did for this one, write a few chapters before posting, then work on the subsequent ones after.
It's probably going to be short as well, whilst I think about a possible sequel.

But I need time to think about, so you're all going to have to be patient.

Arrival Alpha

Okay. Get a good grip. Slow your breathing....what else? Fuck, I wish I'd listened more to Cpl Johnny. Right, pull it tight against the should. Take two deep breaths and hold on the second. Steady your aim, and sight on centre mass. Gently squeeze the trigger....and release both it and your breath.

Time to check on the target. Wait, what? Their armour is bullet proof?? Fuck!!! Screw centre mass, the next one is going between his fucking eyes, here we go again, get a good grip.....

So I suppose your wondering where I am, who I am, and just what in the high hills of fuck, (or should I start using buck now)? I am doing? Well let me take you back to approximately two months ago....

Tool stores on a weekend? Fine by me, paid to play my Xbox for twelve hours. There I am about to assassinate a Promethean Knight when I hear someone talking to me. “Ah, Mr Luckes, there you are.”

Great, my flight sergeant. This should be fun!! “Afternoon Flight, having a good day?” Oh goody, he's been looking for me!! Well, it can't be anything bad, I didn't get that pissed and I passed my fitness test the next morning so...

“I've got some good news and some bad news. You can have the whole of February off. However, as you're one of the few CCS in date, I've put your name forward for guard. In February." Fuck. And before you ask, it's Common Core Skills.

“Okay Flight, when is my training?” I ask, not actually wanting to know.

“Eighth of January, and your guard starts on the first of February. I know you've all ready done it, but everyone else is a lazy fucker who isn't in date.” He doesn't sound too happy about that fact.

“No worries Flight, anything I need to know?” Don't know why I asking, as he probably knows less then me!!

“Only that you can have from the tenth of January to you first day on stag off, you've got thitry nine days of leave to use in three months!”

“Nice one, cheers Flight!” Fuck yes!! Three weeks sat at home blowing shit up. And occasionally walking the dogs!!

Turns out I was on standby for the first four days, and I had to be within two hours of camp. Which sucked, as it takes me around three to get home, and that's on a good day!! Anyway, there I was sat on my Xbox on day one when my phone goes off with a unknown number. Fuck, I hate those!

“Hello?”

“Hello, is that SAC Luckas?”

“No, this is SAC Luckes, just pronounce it without the “e””

“Okay, I was just ringing to find out if you know about the RLF on Sunday?” Don't ask. I may have gone to it, but I don't know what it stands for!!

“Uh, no, I haven't heard anything about it. Was I supposed to have?”

The guy on the other end just sighs heavily. I'm guess that's the current guard commander, having a very “fun” day. “Yeah, you were supposed to be told last week, but there's eight of you that don't know. One guy even has to come back from Ireland! Anyway, I need you to come in and pick up a briefing package for Sunday, are you nearby?”.

“I'm in my room on camp, I'll be there in ten." Why me??

The guy on the other end just says “Okay thanks mate”, and hangs up. Well, I suppose I should get dressed then, what time is it?.....Fuck, two pm?? Whatever. I leave my block and head to the guard room to pick up the details. I just gloss over the first two pages and come to the kit list.

“Erm, Sarge it says here I need armour and webbing,” I say to him. “Well, stores are shit and won't give it to me.”

He just looks at me as if I'm crazy and says “Don't worry the Scuppers will have some spare over on the site.”

“Okay, thanks for the info.” I say as I leave the hut. Right time for breakfast...or lunch. Or should I just go straight to dinner? I get the feeling that if my gut could talk it'd be saying “Whatever dude, just get me some fucking food”!! I stop off at the Naffi and grab some snacks, mainly the unhealthy kind. Once I get back to my room, I start reading the paperwork. Fairly standard stuff until I see a bit that doesn't register with my brain the first ten times I read it

“Personnel list at annex B must report to the Guard Room to collect their weapons
at o-five-fifteen, then proceed to the armoury to collect x4 magazines. Ammunition will be
issued by the RAF police at a later time”

o-five-fifteen?? On a fucking Sunday. You have got to be joking......

“Clock is ticking, Clock is ticking, Clock is ticking”

Ugh. Really, I had to choose that as my alarm. What time is it? Even I was quite surprised at how coherent I was, as I normally need to be awake for a couple hours for my brain to kick in. O-four hundred. I wish I liked tea or coffee, I could do with the caffeine. I dragged my lazy ass out of bed and proceeded to shit, shower and shave. Think I'll go in CS95's today, as it's quite windy. Let's see, CBRN suit and wet weather gear packed, respirator and haversack ready, munchies and drinks in the side pockets. Right off to the guard room!!

Two hours later and I've got four magazines and a hundred and twenty rounds. Time to bomb up. Just as I finish, the Warrant and the OC of this Op walk in to brief us on how things are going to go. Standard briefing. “This is why we are here, this is where we are operating from, this is who is in charge....” I was listening in, but one half of my brain, as it tends to do, had a nice catchy tune going round in it......

“Come everypony smile smile smile, fill my heart up with sunshine sunshine......and repeat.”

It was then I heard my name called out and get assigned to team two. Well, at least I was in the warm a bit longer, that wind was nasty. There were already two trucks unloading, but it wasn't the stuff we were waiting. That was turning up in a convoy apparently.

Watching out the window as the movers loaded up pallets with barrels that had lovely little hazard warnings on the side, we all sat there joking about what was inside it. I mean come on, what else could be in a big ass steel drum marked “Harmful to the environment” and “Radioactive”? Still, we were just waiting for a certain item to turn up, and we didn't even know what it was. Finally after around two and a half hours of waiting the convoy arrived. I'd never seen so many police vehicles in one go!!

Five bikes, two cars, a van and a big ass command truck. Then the vehicle we were waiting to stand out in the freezing wind around. Followed by another police van, two more cars and the camp off road ambulance thing. Hey, it had six wheels as big as me!! I don't what the damn thing is called!!

Anyways, once it was parked up, four of us made our way over and set up a perimeter. If you weren't all ready inside it, and you attempted to get in without checking to see if your name was on the list then, well, you'd be meeting Mr Five point Five Six. After we warned you anyway. Being civies, and getting paid by the hour they took ages unloading the truck. Once it was finally secured on to the Atlas low loader, we made our way over to the waiting aircraft. I took up a position near the ramp and watched them start loading it up. I had just turned away when I heard something hit concrete, and the booming voice of the Warrant shouting “Stand to!!” I was just about to put a round in the chamber when the was a bright flash and I felt a pressure wave wash over me and fling me through the air.

I hit a concrete wall, and my first thought was “Fuck, I've hit the Sanger!!” It wasn't till I put my hand out to get up when I noticed something. Something wrong, very, very wrong. The wall was straight. It should have been curved!!! Where the hell was I??

Wait a moment, why does this place look vaguely familiar? Okay, it's some kind of ruin. What the hell was in those barrels, or was it even from them? And why is is dark out? These were some of the questions that were floating around my head, and as the last thought came to me, I looked at my watch. Thirteen-twenty nine GMT, and it was still moving. Plus it's digital, so if the battery was dead, it wouldn't even be on!! Okay, so I hadn't been knocked out and taken somewhere else, but this definitely was NOT my base!!

That's when I decided that sitting on my arse wasn't going to accomplish anything, so I began to explore my surroundings. I was in what used to be a fairly large hall by the looks of it. It was then I noticed a raised dais at one end and went to have a look. At the top stood two thrones. Okay, so this place used to have royalty. But they don't look the correct size or shape for humans. Looking passed the thrones, I noticed a carving in the stone behind them.

In the centre were two circles, one made to look like the sun, the other the moon. Floating, I guess is the right word, around on the left was what appeared to be an engraving of a horse with wings and a horn, with another on the other side facing down and up respectively As I brushed the dust off, I got got a clearer picture of what was there. It was then I realised why I recognised it and where from. I couldn't wrap my head around it, and the first thought that came to me when my brain rebooted echoed around me......in the Ancient Castle Of The Royal Pony Sisters......

“Oh, you've gotta be fucking kidding me!!!!

Author's Note

So yeah, my first fic. A big pile of crap right?

No go on, you can tell me you hate it and won't continue with it.
It's fine. I don't even know why I wrote this!

Extraction.....of some sort. And a hoof massage.

If there is a pony that controls karma in Equestria, then they are going to get the hardest bitch slap I can muster.

As I made it outside, I pulled a large bench in front of the doors, which thankfully opened outwards. As the banging on the door started, I turned around, and noticed three things. First, was a few extra ponies. That all looked the same and wore golden armour. Oh shit. The second was the massive red stallion with a look on his face that made the Tsar bomb look like a fart. The third, and most disconcerting, was that they were all staring at me.

I looked for an exit when the red stallion started to make his way over slowly, and started speaking with a southern twang to his voice. Yep, that's Big Mac. "Big" doesn't do him justice!! "An' jus' what do you think y’all doin' with mah sister's bow?"

It was then that I realised I had tied her ribbon around the hand guard of my rifle. Before he could get any closer, I saw a gathering of lavender light to my left, and aimed my rifle at the source. I do not want to do this, but I will defend myself if I have to. The gathering of light grew brighter, until a wall appeared between me and the angry apple farmer. It then proceeded to envelop me and formed a domed structure over me, with around a 20 metre radius.

I looked at the source as Twilight began to issue instructions around. “Okay, guardsponies, keep an eye on it. Big Mac, move that bench out of the way. Mayor, you need to.....” It was around then when I tuned out and walked to the wall of light to see how well it was going to hold me. I put my gloved hand out to see if it was solid, and to my surprise, it felt like jelly. Huh, that's weird. Maybe she thinks seeing this will dissuade me from escaping. Yeah, right.

I gave it a few good taps in one place till the resistance broke down, and I left it be to see what would happen. There was a flutter in the dome-shield that centred on where I'd tapped it, and when I tested it again, it was a little harder. Okay, so it repairs itself and increases in strength. Interesting. Huh, this part still feels like jelly. Maybe it just repairs the broken parts??

My internal curiosity took a back seat as what ever the lavender mare was saying was coming to an end. “......and I'll go get Spike to send a letter to Celestia. I think she'd like to know about our visitor.”

Oh hell no!! Not this soon!!! Acting before thinking, which I was never prone to before, I charged at a point on the wall on the opposite side of my “test” nearest an alleyway. Everything slowed down to a crawl, like an action sequence from CoD. Out of my peripheral vision, I saw a crimson streak on an intercept course from my right, and a blue blur followed by a rainbow from my left. To my combined surprise and expectations, with enough force I passed right through as I hit the wall, earning a stunned gasp from its caster as time sped back up.

Making it to the alley, I heard a large crash followed by a groan as Mac didn't make the turn in time, but I could still feel Rainbow's eyes burning in to me as I made for the edge of the village. Just what are those “guards” doing?? A bolt of what looked like lightning flew past my head as I heard a deep voice call out behind me, “Stop, in the name of the Royal Pony sisters!!!!” I turned a corner at a intersection as Rainbow sped by, whilst I remained unaware of how close she had got to me.

I turned to the nearest guard and looked him in the eyes causing him to stop. Okay, they're all Unicorns, so no death from above? Wait, no armour, blue mane, shield cutie mark.....shit. I saw a couple of barrels off to my right out of their sight lines, and instantly placed my challenge. “Stop? Lol, nope!!” As I took off again, I knocked the barrels over and was rewarded by some very male-sounding groans. Ouch. Sorry guys, but I'm not ready to talk yet!!

I heard what I thought were birds above me before I remembered the other pony chasing me, pushing me to double my efforts. I wasn't a threat to them....okay, maybe I was, but I just wanted to go home. Sure they could've helped, but since when does our species think straight when still high on adrenaline?? I could see the tree line from my location and started to sprint towards it. I had made it about half the distance when the ground seemed to get further away and, well to be honest, I started to shit myself.

“What the fuck?? Where's the fucking ground gone? Why the fuck am I flying?” I was about to continue when my “backpack” started talking....

“Yeesh, calm down!!! Stop struggling, it's hard to fly, and you're pretty heavy anyway. It'd be easier for all of us if you don't run”

Rainbow Dash. We're only eight foot off the ground. I can survive that. She's holding me with her hooves, and guess what she doesn't like touched???

Reaching my hand up, I gently started massaging her left fore hoof, and her reaction was brilliant. Her cheeks suddenly looked like they were on fire, and she pulled her hooves away from their assailant. Which meant she dropped me. Landing on my ass was not the most graceful way, but it had worked. I got up as quick as I could and realised she had only made it around five metres. Damn, was I that fat? I started my sprint again before my blue “captor” regained her senses, and made it to the tree line as I heard her shout behind me. “No, wait, we don't want to hurt you!”

Ignoring this, I made my way deeper in to the forest, and looked for a sturdy tree to climb to spend the night. I found a massive one with branches low enough to start climbing, and by the time I made it half way, it dawned on me how big this tree was. There was a branch coming off just above me nearly thirty foot wide, which would make a good place to get some rest. I took off my bag, webbing and armour, and made a makeshift pillow. It must've been summer, as it was gone eleven when I checked my watch, but it still felt like midday. Checking to see I hadn't been followed, or wouldn't be attacked by Smokey and his merry wolves, I settled down to get some much needed sleep.

Meanwhile, in a village not that far away.......

“I don't care if you are the Captain of the Royal Guard!!!! That creature is injured, and he needs our help!!”

The stallion kept backing away, fearing for his life, as Fluttershy bore down on him. “Twily, I thought you said she was the timid one?”

“Armour, Fluttershy thinks of the needs of anypony and anything before herself. And trust me, you don't want to stop her!!”

It was then that more voices where thrown in to the debate. “Did you see it's coverings? Why if they're articles of clothing they must be for some soft of functionality instead of fashion. They looked like the colours of the forest, do you really think you could find him, Fluttershy dear?

“Well, um, I don't really know.......but I'd like to try.”

“And then we can throw him a party! Yay!” Pinkie suddenly shouted as she bounced around the others, totally oblivious as to the serious nature of the discussion. A look of shock and then fear washed over Applejack at some very bad memories.

“Pinkie, if he's a soldier, don't y’all think he may not like parties? You remember the one you tried to throw for the guards right?”

“Oh yeah. I don't know if he has a dungeon anywhere, and I'd rather not have to break out.....again”

Fluttershy had managed calm down at Rarity's question, and Shining Armour took this opportunity to use his sister as a shield before speaking again. “Yes, and you are still classed as fugitive by the laws of Equestria.....but as you are one of the Element Bearers, I think we can let that slide. But, we also still need to rebuild the castle walls you broke. I understand your family works on a rock farm?”

A surprisingly guilty pink face looked at him, realising it wasn't some game, and she could have been in serious trouble. “Yes sir they do. I'll go down there tomorrow and see what help I can get you”

“Thank you Miss Pie. Now, on to the matter at hand. It is almost midnight, and we are in no state to go searching through the forest this late at night. Everypony is to go to their homes. The guards will remain here patrolling the town for any signs of the creature.”

There were a few murmurs of dissent, the townsponies wanting to be the ones to keep their homes safe, but they were quelled by one who they thought would join them. “Listen up everypony! I know you want to protect each other, but these guys are trained for it!! We're not! If we tried to help, we'd just get in the way, so let's all just go home.” As she finished, Rainbow Dash fluttered back to the ground near her friends, ready to head home for some sleep before she got an unexpected question.

“Hey sugarcube, how exactly did he get away from you? We all saw you lift him up!”

“Well, h-h-he......was quite heavy, and I dropped him. He just recovered faster than me and made it to the tree line before I could get him again.” She turned away, hope her friends wouldn't notice the light blush gracing her cheeks.

“Well, I can tell you dropped him, but why are y’all hiding the real reason? You can tell us sugarcube, we won't judge.” As Applejack said this, Rainbow turned back around having had time to calm down.

“He...freaked out. I don't think his species can fly. I'm not sure what made him start doing it, or why, but he started to massage my hooves.”

“Oh, dear, it must have been something rather good for him to make you all bashful Rainbow. Come now, what did you say?

“He massaged my hooves”

It was the next voice that broke her mental walls, however. “um, could you speak up a bit, we still didn't quite hear you....”

“HE MASSAGED MY HOOVES!!!!”

There was a stunned silence from the others until a filly like snickering came from behind them. Turning they expected to see one of the fillies laugh at Rainbow getting embarrassed, but instead they were met with a crimson stallion, who thought he was hearing things thanks to the bump on his head, trying to contain his schoolfilly-like giggles.

He didn't last long, promptly bursting out it full blown laughter, which then set the others off, including Shining Armour, and worst of all, Fluttershy. As she was about to unleash some built up aggravation, a large wing draped across her back, and she turned to see a rather large pegasus stallion next to her. All she could see was a dark grey coat, shimmering teal eyes, and golden helmet. He was the leader of the pegasi guard Shining had order to follow if they didn't return by nightfall. It was then that she realised he was talking to her.

“........so as I was saying, you're not the only one who doesn't like their hooves touched. Come on, I think it's best we get you home, young miss.”

The laughter continued as Rainbow Dash fainted from being wrapped in the wing of a stallion she didn't know............in front of all her friends.

Author's Note

Yeah, so I tried to insert a bit of comedy in here. Somewhere. If you tell me whether it worked of not, it'd be much appreciated.

Oh and before you start asking. Twilight doesn't know his abilities, so she went with the weakest form she knew of the spell.

You don't just walk in to Fluttershy's cottage and leave with your dignity

As I stepped out from the spa, I saw a few extra guards stood around. A voice to my right drew my attention. “Ah, Protues-Pestis, there you are, I have been looking for you.” Looking over, I saw a pink Alicorn with a mane mixed with yellow, pink, and purple.

“Princess Cadenza, a pleasure to see you again Ma'am. But if I may ask, what is it you just called me?”

“It is ancient Equestrian. Loosely translated, it means 'Changeling-bane'. Acceptable, considering your actions in saving my life. Now I wish to ask of you two things. First, why did you throw one off the roof when you had defeated it?”

“If, and let's be honest she would have, Celestia let it go, then it would have reported back that you were still alive, and that you had something different to protect you, they may have sent a much larger force. And not to to take over this time. I couldn't take that risk. It may have been cruel, but I needed to show any spies watching that Equestria is not to be messed with.”

“I see. Now my second question. I do not know if you know it, but I am the Alicorn of Love. I have come here because I felt an immense surge in it starting from last night. Do you know what could've caused it?”

“I think I know why, if you'd like to follow me ma'am.”

“Please, call me Cadence.”

“Yes ma'am.”

“Auntie Luna said you were like this, so I'll make it an order. Call me Cadence. Understood?”

“Yes ma....Cadence.” I led her to the guard hut, and just as we got within visual range a excited squeal sounded from that direction.

“Cady?” Oh how nice to see you!! What are you doing here?” 'Cady'?? Wait, that's Galaxy, Cadence's mother in law! “I see you've meet Twilight's new friend!”

“Actually mum, this is the one who stopped the Changelings the other night.” Galaxy looked from her to me a few times before jumping around my neck.

“What is it with you mares and trying to strangle me?” She climbed back down and offered me a sheepish smile. “It's okay, I don't mind, but I've still got a couple of weeks before the doctor signs me off. How are they getting on?”

“Oh well, um.....perhaps you'd better take a look. They're in the briefing room......” Shrugging, I motioned for Cadence to follow me and we snuck in. Seeing a light coming from under the briefing room door, we crept over and listened quietly. Easing the door open, I saw Feather's horn poking over the top of a sofa, with a bit of purple mane tucked in to his shoulder. A sofa in a briefing room? I'm so implementing that when I get home! Behind them on a table was a.....a fucking DVD Player?? 'Pony'? The fuck?....which was hooked up to a projector on the ceiling. I looked next to the player and saw a familiar case...but with ponies on it.

You have got to be kidding me....That's when I heard the intro......

“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Baltimare Seaport. General opinion started to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. Seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy but it's always there. Fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, coltfriends, marefriends, old friends. When the Changelings hit Canterlot, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from people inside were messages of hate or revenge, they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling, you'll find that love actually is all around.”

I whispered to the stunned pony beside me. “You have your answer. Come on, let's leave them to it.” As we reached the exit, Cadence stopped and looked back.

“Lucky, just who was that in there?”

“That would be Lieutenant White Feather.......and Lady Sparkle.” I saw the look in her eyes and pushed her out the door. “No. We are not going back in there. They need this, and no one or nopony is going to spoil it for them.”

“But where are the rest of the guards? Surely they would be here?”

“Nova is in Canterlot with Rarity, his sister got him some tickets to a fancy restaurant. Strike is probably still in Sugarcube Corner, likely getting some very sweet baked good. Starfyre is probably still in the bar with Rainbow Dash, or she's got him to race her somewhere. Cannon Bolt is....actually I have no idea....” I was interrupted by a white blur flying through the air, followed by a slightly slower green one on the ground.

“You get yer flank back here little missy!!! Ah won't have you anywhere Big Mac!! You maybe wearin' that fancy armour, but Ah still recognise yer!!!”

“Granny Smith.”

“Who, what? Oh you. The monkey fella. Well, what yer want? I got a fillies flank t' tan.”

“I'd appreciate it if you didn't maim my guards. Perhaps you and Cannon Bolt could just sit down and talk about this. I don't know what happened, but what I do know is Mac likes her just a much as she likes him. By chasing her off, you're also hurting your grandson. Is that what you really want?”

“One of yer guards huh? AJ said somein' about that. Okay, fine. Ah'll sit down with that hussy, but if she puts on hoof outta line, Ah'm getting mah helmet.” With that, she turned and started a slow trot back towards the farm.

“Sir? Thank you for that. When she saw me with Mac she just lost it, and I couldn't hit an elderly mare.”

“Not a problem Bolt. Head back to Mac and tell him that Granny Smith wants to talk to you both. Just.....be careful around her.”

“Yes sir!” And with that, she was gone in a white blur again. I just looked at Cadence and shrugged.

“Well, that's where Bolt is. Sergeant Legstrong is probably still sparring with Applejack, and Sergeant Streak is......well how about we go check on them. I fear for his safety.” Cadence giggled at that and we headed off in the direction of Fluttershy's cottage, her guards in tow.

Upon arriving at the cottage, we noticed all but one of the lights off, so we knew they were still awake. We walked across the bridge and I knocked on the door and we heard a hushed conversation. Eventually, I heard hoof steps and the door cracked open a little revealing a very messed up Jet Streak. “Captain, your majesty, what can I do for you this fine evening?”

“I was wondering how you and Fluttershy were getting along, and how your talk went.”

“Yeah, our.....talk. It went fine.”

“Why I am not convinced? Where's Fluttershy, I want to hear this from her.” I went to push the door open and Streak pushed it back against me.

“No, you can't come in!”

“Dammit Streak! Open the door or I'll break it down!!”

“No!!”

A gentle voice from inside started to talk, and I could tell it was coming from her couch, but it was punctuated with heavy breathing. “Captain it's.....okay......we were just.....talking......”

No understanding right away, I pushed harder as I heard Cadence speak. “No Captain, everything is fine here, I can sense the amount of love inside!!!” It was too late. I had made it inside. And what I saw left me very red faced and Streak looking down at the floor.

I just turned around and headed out the door, turning to shut it, looking between the two very embarrassed ponies. “Sergeant Strike, report for duty in the morning. Other than that....carry on.” I just started walking back in to town. “Princess Cadence, I don't wish to be rude, but I'm going to turn in. This night has been.......eventful to say the least.”

“Yes it has. Good night Captain.”

“Good night ma'am.”

Waking up the next morning, I could hear a quiet conversation before a door shut. Walking out in to the main hall, I saw Feather gathering stuff for breakfast in the mess. “Wow, that's one thing I never thought I'd see.”

“Morning sir. What didn't you think you'd see? Me making breakfast?”

“No.” He started to eat his cereal. “Lady Sparkle doing the walk of shame.” Said cereal was the spat out across the table and on to my t shirt. “You're cleaning that.”

“Yes sir. What exactly is a 'walk of shame', in this context?”

“It's when military personnel bring back a member of the opposite sex to their barracks, and the morning after they leave camp on their own, without the soldier escorting them from their room.”

“I see. And what usually goes on?”

“Really? You're asking that? What do you think happens when a male and female get together and head back somewhere?”

His eyes went wide and his horn started to glow a little. Heh, I guess the fandom got another thing right! "We.... we.... I... didn't....Sir... how could you even suggest.....”

I burst out laughing at him and carried on till a female voice spoke behind me. “They didn't because he knows what would happen if he tried to before he made an honest mare of my daughter.” Turning around, I saw a semi-amused and semi-concerned Galaxy stood in the door way. “However, I can vouch that whilst they shared a bed, nothing happened.” I looked back at Feather, who's face was now red and he had tried to sink under the table.

“But Mrs Sparkle, how can you be sure that we didn't.....you know....”

“Because my daughter is still what some would call 'pure'. And if you had done anything last night, not only would we have heard you, she wouldn't have been up so early. Especially if she takes after me. I didn't get up till the after....”

“OKAY!! That's enough of that!” I stood up from the table and grabbed an apple. “You guys can carry on talking if you want, I'm heading to my morning physio session. See you later.” As I left I passed Nightlight coming out of one of the rooms. “Mr Sparkle.”

“ugh, where's the coffee?”

“You'd have to ask Feather, I don't drink the stuff.” With that, I stepped out in to town.

As I entered the Ponyville Spa, Aloe and Lotus rushed up to the door. “Ah Captain, we did not expect to see you again so soon. What can we do for you this morning?”

“These same as yesterday if you would be so kind please ladies. I have to have a session morning and evening. Which reminds me, is there somewhere around here where I could get a swimming session in?”

“There is a lake just outside of town, we can direct you to it after we are done. Now, you go and take those clothes off and meet us in the massage parlour.

“Yes ma'am.” As I walked past, I didn't catch them winking at each other.

The massage passed like usual, their hooves doing a good job at working through my muscles and wounds. It took longer than the night before due to the fact that one of them had to go see another customer at some point.

After around an hour, Lotus I think, informed me that nopony else was going to be in the room, and I could relax in there for as long as I wanted to. I just sighed and remained on the table, with just a towel covering me. I could hear a faint clicking and rolled over to see what it was. Opening my eyes, I saw a camera near the ceiling, hovering in a purple aura.

My towel was suddenly ripped from me, and the camera started clicking faster. I rolled myself back over so that they couldn't see my front. “See, it wasn't that hard was it? I just wanted a few pictures for the science books.”

What Twilight didn't realise was that just within my reach was my pistol. I pulled it out and aimed it at the camera, clicking the safety off. “No!” It suddenly sped out of my aim and in to Twilight's hooves, who then took off running, leaving two embarrassed ponies by the door.

“We're sorry, we didn't think it would bother you. After all you are quite the specimen of your species. And it's our pleasure to work for you.”

“Ladies, as much as I like your massages, I'm afraid I'm going to have to say no to anything else.”

“Whatever are you talking about?” They both winked at me and then left.

“For fuck sake. No matter where you go, women are the fucking same!!!”

A short time later, Aloe looked up from the desk, and saw the captain leaving. “Captain, we have drawn you a map to the lake for you swimming session. It is usually empty around two in the afternoon. Oh, and Miss Rarity asked if you could stop by the boutique at some point today.”

“I see, thank you, and I shall see you this evening.” She watched him walk out of the building.

“Yes, you will see us this evening, but we will see you around two this afternoon.....”

Heading towards the boutique, I was assailed by a little white unicorn filly. “Lucky, help me!! My parents are trying to take me home!!” I looked up and saw them standing just outside Rarity's, with impatient faces.

“And just why is that a problem?”

“I want to hear about Rarity's date, and she won't tell me. She said she'll only tell you.”

I knelt down to her and began to whisper. “How about this, you go home with your parents, and I'll tell you what Rarity tells me. Is that okay?”

“Yep, that's fine.” She ran off to her parents, and they waved as they left. I walked up to the door and knocked a couple of times.

“Come in darling, I've been expecting you.”

“Good morning to you Miss Rarity. I trust last night went well. And where are you?”

“I am in the back, do not come till I am ready.” Okay, a conversation through walls. Like talking to my brother again. Wait, that's talking to a wall, not through them. “As for last night, it went as well as can be. Nova is nice, but he's a shy colt. I can tell he hasn't been with many mares, if at all.”

“Or maybe he's just intimidated by your beauty.”

“I was hoping you'd say that. I wish to get your opinion on something I hope will bring him out of his little shell.”

“I'm sure if anypony could, it would be you Lady Rarity.”

She gave a giggle as she spoke. “Oh such chivalry, if only you were a pony....”

“I....you.....what?”

“I jest, it seems you are not the only one to able fluster another. Come, I am ready now. Second door on the right.”

I walked down the corridor and opened said door, where my brain ground all processes except those to survive with the sight that greeted me.

“What do you think darling, will it work?”

Author's Note

Guess the film!!! Don't bother trying to use Google, I changed it around to fit Equestria, and Google can't work out what the original is!!!!

Arrival round 2

The intercom buzzed and a voice roused him from his sleep. “Admiral, we're almost there.”

“I'll be up in a bit.” Rolling out of his bunk, he headed in to the bathroom to get cleaned up, he hadn't had a good rest for a while, so his body felt good for almost forty eight hours of doing nothing. Ten minutes later and he entered the bridge, dressed in his combat gear.

“Sir, I really think we need to talk to him about his obsession.”

“And what obsession would that be?”

“His Halo one. I mean, it's bad enough we're on a Prowler, but the combat gear they designed...we look like freaking ODST's!!”

“Do you have a problem with that?”

“.....no sir.”

“Good. Get to your position and be ready for anything.”

“Yes sir.” The admiral settled in to the command chair and sighed, speaking to himself in a whisper.

“Wait till you see how we are getting down there.......”

“Twilight, what are you doing up at this time of night?”

She was stood on the balcony outside her bedroom. “I can't sleep. I'm having nightmares again.”

Her husband came up and stood beside her, nuzzling her gently. “It's cold out here, why don't you come back to bed?” She just looked up to the canvas that Luna used in her art.

“He was right you know.”

“About what?”

“That there is a beauty and peace at night. I don't know why ponies all those years ago couldn't see it when it's right there.”

“It's quite late, but why don't we go do some stargazing? I'll carry the equipment, you're in no condition to do that any more.”

Twilight just looked down at her slightly swollen stomach. “I'm not that far along you know? But.... thank you.” A short while later and they were lying on the grass on top of a hill on their backs looking up at the sky. Peace pervaded until another voice came across the ground.

“Hey boss! Didn't expect to see you out at this time of night.”

“Lieutenant Streak. May I ask what you are doing here?”

“I'm.....on my way to see Fluttershy. We....had a bit of an argument and I need to sort things out. If that's okay with you, Colonel?”

“Here's an idea. Why don't you get her to come out here?”

“Because this isn't a conversation I want to have in public.”

Twilight looked over at the pegasus who had his head hanging towards the ground. “What was the fight about? Maybe I can help.”

“It wasn't a fight...or an argument as such. We just got to talking about stuff.....and it eventually turned to talk about marriage and foals....and I spooked. I just flew out of there. That was two nights ago.”

“No wonder Fluttershy didn't want to see anypony. Streak, you're a moron sometimes.”

“Why thank you Lady Sparkle, I never realised that.”

“Lieutenant, watch who you're talking to.”

“Sorry sir.”

“Now, get your flank over to that cottage and apologi....Twilight what's wrong?” She had her attention to the sky, and he followed her gaze, Streak doing the same. In the inky blackness was a bright blue aurora, which whilst spectacular, was also cause for concern. “Twilight, has anything like that ever happened here before?”

“No, you only see things like that in the Crystal Empire....” As she trailed of, the aurora disappeared, but they could see a new star......one that moved across the night sky slowly. She ran to the telescope and pointed it in the direction of the anomaly. “I'm don't know what that is, but it's not a star....”

White Feather moved over and had a look himself. He could make out blue lights along the body, and on the outer edges were flashing red and green lights. “We need to tell the princesses about this....” There was a flash from the anomaly that they could see without the telescope, and something came away from it.....before turning towards the planet and entering the atmosphere.

“Are we under attack?”

“I don't know lieutenant, but we may need to get reinforcements. I'll gather the Seven's, you contact Canterlot.”

“Yes sir.” As he turned to gallop off, the object in the sky disappeared over the horizon to the south.

“Celestia help us.....”

“Entering normal space in five.” They all turned to their stations and started monitoring the ships status. They had made numerous jumps and now they were used to the effects of the transition. Reporting the statuses was no longer necessary, as there was no difference each time. “And we're back. Sensors are picking up a planet.....it's massive.”

“How big?”

“If the sensors are right sir.....it's three times the size Earth.”

“That's big. Start the scanners. Hopefully we'll pick up on his emergency transponder.”

“Scanners are warming up......by the computers calculations, it's going to take eighteen hours to scan the entire surface, so it may be a while.....”

“SIR! We've got a hit all ready!! An emergency transponder signal, and it is consistent with the equipment he had!”

“That quick? Okay, drop a beacon to that position and lock us in to geosynchronous orbit of where we are now, then head down to the docking level. We're leaving the Luna in orbit and taking a different way down.” As they turned to their stations and started typing in commands, he watched as the beacon launched in a white streak towards the planet.

“Sir, do we know what's going on?”

“No. We aren't to do anything yet, but we are to be ready. Princess Luna doesn't know what it is either, and she can't get a hold of it with her magic.”

“SIR!” White Feather turned to the pegasus at the telescope.

“What is it Sergeant Starfyre?”

“Something else has broken away from the main object and is heading in the same direction as the first, but at a slower pace.”

“So something is controlling it then? We shall follow orders and remain in Ponyville to protect the Bearers....for now.”

“Yes sir.”

“Admiral, I beginning to think this was all a big joke!”

“And why is that?”

“BECAUSE WE ARE IN A FUCKING PELICAN, sir!”

“Hey, even I didn't know about it till ten minutes before we left!!! You're not the only one that was a little shocked.”

“Yeah, but ten months?”

“Surprise bitches.”

One of the other officers sat down the back spoke up. “Hey boss, can I say something, seeing as we're in a Pelican dressed as ODST's?”

“Permission granted.”

“I've always wanted to say this: FEET FIRST INTO HELL!!!”

“Helljumpers. You fucking moron.”

“Yes sir.”

It was early morning when their ship arrived at the beacon, and what they saw shocked them. For two miles around the crater the sand was black and cracked, and there was a hill that they could tell should be higher. The place looked like someone had dumped a nuke on it. They set down at the edge of the field and exited the drop ship. “Okay, the beacon is over that way, near the centre, that's where we got the transponder signal from.”

“Weapons check. Ben?”

“Heavy support ready to go, Sir.”

“Dave?”

“Explosives ready, sir.”

“Daniel, I can't believe, that out of all of us, I'm asking you this. Sniper?”

“Ready to take some heads off sir.”

“Good. Move out.”

After half an hour a walking through what looked like a ruined city, they had arrived at the centre. The middle of the crater was very deep, and they could see through some holes that there used to be a massive hole here, more than likely filled in by what ever they were now walking on.

“Sir, the signal is coming from with five metres of our position.”

“Spread out and start looking.” They started to route around through the wreckage, hoping to find some sort of sign or clue as to his whereabouts. The admiral was just about to lift up a large metal plate when on of the troops ran up to him.

“Sir! Look at this!” He was handed a piece of glass that had a strap around it, large enough for a human head. Taking off his helmet, the admiral put it up to his eye, which then widened in surprise at what was displayed.

HUD Hardware damaged.
Weapon targeting offline.
Please return to manufacturer.

“This.....is it. This is the emergency transponder.....but where is the rest of it? Why only this piece?”

“Sir, there's no bodies here. If Alec was here, then he's long gone.”

“We need answers. Back to the Pelican, we heading for Ponyville.......once we find it.”

Twilight was walking along with her friends, who were all chatting excitedly about what the lights in the sky were. Their respective partners were out patrolling the Everfree, making sure nothing had snuck up on the town during the night. Rainbow Dash, typically, thought it would be awesome if it was more aliens, but Twilight had shot her down immediately, saying that there was no evidence to support it.

They were just about to enter Sugarcube Corner when a sudden gasp from behind them made them turn around. They looked at Pinkie Pie who seemed to just be standing there until her mane and coat started to blow around like there was a gale right in front of her. As quick as it started, it stopped.

“Pinkie, what was that? I've not see that Pinkie Sense before.”

“That last happened when me and Flutter....” She trailed off as it hit her again, and then repeated twice more.

“Pinkie?”

“I DON'T KNOW!!!” Just as Twilight was about to respond, they heard a loud scream from the edge of town, and they rushed towards it. At first they thought he was back, but then another one appeared, followed by two more. The one in the lead saw them standing there and approached, it's weapon pointing at the ground. Twilight instantly recognised it and pulled it from the creatures grasp.

“Ooooh, an L85!!! Let's see here.....” She pulled the magazine out and slid the cocking handle back, watching as a round exited the chamber. “Walking around with a weapon made ready? Who taught you, a blind chipmunk?” The creature, as they couldn't see if it was human because of the darkened visor, just stood there, it's head cocked at an angle and not saying anything as Twilight proceeded to strip the weapon down, before reassembling it and passing it back. “Thought so, an A2. Yours seems to be a bit lighter though.”

The admiral couldn't believe it. He hadn't even started talking when the purple one grabbed his rifle, removed the magazine, chided him, and then stripped his weapon before reassembling it and floating back over to him. She had even carried out the function test correctly.

“How do you know how to operate this weapon?”

“Oh, so you can talk. I guess the short version of it is I was taught how to before I shot myself in the face with it. He wasn't too happy about that.”

“Who wasn't?” He watched her expression fall as she hung her head.

“I.....don't want to talk about it.”

“Look, we are here to find our friend, if you know where he is then please tell us.”

A male voice sounded behind them and they turned to see a massive white unicorn in gold armour heading towards them. “The Captain is no longer around. Please, do not talk about it in public, it makes them upset.” He raised a hoof and pointed it around the gathered ponies. “Follow me and we can discuss it.”

“Lead the way.”

“.....and that was the last time any of us saw him. He sacrificed everything so that we could escape. He is a true hero to our ponies.”

“So you think he's dead?”

“Nothing could have survived that blast. Even if he did, he wouldn't have made it out in time to escape the falling structures. That was about eight months ago.”

“So we came all this way.....for nothing.”

“No, Daniel, we came here for a good reason. Just because we didn't find him, doesn't mean it was for nothing.”

“Yes sir.”

White Feather looked at the gathered humans in the guard station. “I am assuming you are his friends?” They all nodded. “Then there is something you need to see. Lieutenant Streak!”

“Yes sir?”

“Show these gentlecolts to the train station and purchase them a return ticket to Canterlot, I'll inform Captain Gale of their arrival.”

“On it sir.”

“What are we going to see?”

“What he has done whilst he was here. I would say leave your weapons, but you may need them. We are still getting reports of scattered Changeling activity, but we never find anything.”

“I see. Thank you for your time, I'm sure we'll meet again.”

“Yes, I'm sure we will.” He watched the humans leave and looked to the picture on his desk, from all those months ago in Manehatten. “Dammit Captain, where are you?”

The pegasus mare watched her husband change into a pony in front of her, then looked to the creature laid out on their couch. They had been looking after it since he brought it back. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Yes, I've got to go to Canterlot to let them know he is here. We've healed him all we can. I received word from a friend on the inside that more of his kind have arrived. He can go home.”

“But what if he tries to do something to the foal?” Her husband pulled her close and revealed his true face, giving her a kiss before opening the door.

“Then tell him that Pokey will be spending another night in jail. He'll understand.”