The Altered Rainbow

by Harmony The Cat

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human, Other, Original Character, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 1187

The sun goddess seems to have booked a meeting with the Element of Loyalty. What could possibly be so important that Princess Celestia herself would want to have some alone time with Rainbow Dash?

The sun goddess seems to have booked a meeting with the Element of Loyalty. They converse about anything and everything, leaving Rainbow Dash wondering why she was called forth on such short notice. For goodness sake, she's the Element of Loyalty, not Patience!

Author's Note: Just a little comedy requested by a dear friend of ours.

Published 2013-02-18 04:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-02-18 04:30:02 UTC

An "Important" Meeting

It's a wonderful day in Ponyville, the birds are chirping, ponies are conversing and party cannons are showering the pony village with confetti. A typical day. Well, if it weren't for Derpy going around bumping into poles and crashing into buildings it'd be more peaceful, but ponies are ponies. All living for a different fate and destiny. Destinies that will contribute to other ponies destinies, creating a web of friendship in Equestria. Now let us focus on a certain pony, the Element of Loyalty. A strong, courageous, loyal, and independent pony, but like other ponies, she has her downsides. Weakness, fear, undependable, and dependent. Yes, We are very aware that We have stated the obvious opposite to Rainbow Dash's strengths, but don't mind that.

Now, Rainbow Dash is known to not speak much about her parents. Does this mean she doesn't have any parents? Is Rainbow Dash an orphan? The answer is no, Rainbow Dash has parents who both love her dearly, at least, we all hope so. Why did We bother to bring up such a topic? No apparent reason, this work is tagged as Random, remember?

Back to the real story. Rainbow Dash is simply cruising around Ponyville (by cruising, I mean flying at the speed of sound), testing out her speed for, Celestia-knows-what. She does this for an hour or two until she stops and lands for a breather.

"Whew, whatta work out!"

The blue pegasus wipes the sweat off her brow with her hoof and trots over to the middle of town. Upon her arrival, she is impeded by a royal guard from Canterlot.

"Element of Loyalty, the Princess wishes to see you," he pauses to stomp his hoof onto the ground to create a dramatic effect, "AT ONCE!"

"Oh, well then whatcha waiting for? Let's go!" Rainbow Dash demands.

"Indeed, let us go, but please do get into the carriage before we depart," the guard informs.

"Forget that! I'll fly there myself, carriages are for scrawny pegasi and other ponies that can't fly!" she scoffs as she takes off at an amazing speed to Canterlot.

The royal guards sigh, "That Rainbow Dash definately doesn't know how to be a lady."

At the Canterlot palace entrance, Rainbow Dash is greeted by a male servant pony to guide her to the meeting room.

"Miss Rainbow Dash, what ever happened to the escort carriage?" the servant pony asks, worried.

"Oh them? They were too slow and I left 'em behind," she replies with a laugh.

"I see. Very well then Miss Loyalty. I shall lead you to the meeting room now."

The servant bows and begins to lead the way. The two go through large, long halls and tall doors leading to other corridors, doors and what not. They go through over hundreds of doors and about fifty halls until Rainbow Dash suspects that the servant pony is lost.

"Uhh, you're not lo-"

"No questions, I require my focus miss," he interrupts.

Eeyup, this pony is definately lost, the author thinks. Just kidding, We're just here as entertainment until a certain somepony, gets his directions right.

"I'm very sorry Miss Diamond Har-"

DON'T TALK BACK TO ME MISTER!! Err, *ahem* as We were saying, let us keep thee occupied until this servant pony gets to the meeting room. How was thy day? Wonderful! Our day was wonderful. Now enough about us, how about thee? Oh We are simply fabulous, We hope that thou art too.

"Are you okay servant person? You look like you're talking to the air."

Rainbow Dash gives the stallion her most curious look.

"Ah, yes yes, I am fine, just a, a voice."

"Okaaay?"

YOU BOTH ARE INTERRUPTING MY TIME WITH THE VIEW-

"Miss Diamond Harmony, Miss Dash and I have arrived at the meeting room now."

IT'S ABOUT DAMNED TIME! The audience was getting bored. Now back to the real story. The servant stallion introduces the Element of Loyalty to the meeting hall door and opens the door.

"Please do enter, Miss," he says as he bows his head.

Once Rainbow Dash enters the hall, the main door is shut behind her by the servant. The pegasus scans around the room for the sun goddess. Her search was interrupted by the sound of a chair rotating that desperately required oil. We would describe the sound for you,but We wish not to pain thy ears.

"Good afternoon my angel," says a mysterious and suspicious male voice.

"Uh, what?" Rainbow dash replies, confused.

"Wait, let me try something else."

The chair turns back, facing away from Rainbow Dash once again. Trumpets sound to a familiar tune of the Empire.

The voice changes to a more robotic, gruff voice, "Rainbow Dash, coohskee, I am your..." the voice changes once again to a French man's voice, "MOTZAIR!"

The mysterious pony goes hysterical and falls to the floor, laughing. The voice then changes to a more feminine, recognizable voice, that of Nicole Oliver.

"It was a joke from the human world, Rainbow Dash."

"Oh, really? Wait, what'sa... human?" Rainbow Dash asks.

"A being of utter importance. You might think why. It's because they have THUMBS!"

"Thumbs?"

The Princess gets up from the floor and approaches the confused pegasus. Princess Celestia uses her magic to alter Rainbow Dash's hoofs into two hands. The pegasus shrieks in fear.

"Wh-what did you do to my hooves?!"

"You have thumbs now! They are weapons of mass destruction and utter dominance! You shall lead the charge into the world of the thumb creatures and claim it for Equestria!"

The Princess laughs maniacally.

"Just kidding, the director thought it would be a good idea to put you into the human world and learn about the humans in their world along with the rest of the Elements of Harmony."

"Wh-what?"

"Nevermind, forget I said anything."

The Princess uses her magic once again to alter Rainbow Dash's appearance into that of a human's. Rainbow Dash observes her new body. It was that of an athletic female, toned muscles, slightly tanned skin, and a decent sized chest (well, to us a size B is). Rainbow Dash was unsure whether to be joyous of her new body, or horrified. This was something too new to her. Something that would take some time to take in.

"Now go, child! Gather the other Elements of Harmony and alter them. It's dangerous out there, so take this."

Princess Celestia hands the Loyal pegasus with a mechanical device and an instruction manual with OVER... 10 pages (thou wished for that meme, but no). Rainbow Dash was still confused about what was happening and didn't really know what to do, so she just followed the sun goddess's orders and head out of the castle, immediately, to change her other friends into humans also. Meanwhile, Princess is laughing maniacally. The clomputer and interhoof was too hilarious for her to handle. Soon, she would have complete control of both the human world and Equestria!

Author's Note

Well, it is our first comedy, guys. We tried, and hope that we have not failed miserably. Do enjoy.