Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter and those things da 'umies ride

"Why'z did we jump out a window, Boss! We'z all goin to die!" Ucky shouted as he and Gorgutz plummeted from three stories up.

"Shut it ya git! We'z orks and we ain't gonna die just cuz we jumped outta window!" Gorgutz yelled back as they fell past the second floor.

"But..."

"I said shut it!"

Gorgutz slammed into the ground, his cybernetic legs absorbing most of the impact. Ucky wasn't so lucky, narrowly missing being impaled on the spear of a statue.

Gorgutz stood up and hauled Ucky to his feet with his power klaw.

"What we'z gonna do now Boss?" Ucky asked as he stared at the group of seven Squigs at the window.

"Runnin sound good to ya?"

"No, I think not." Discord's voice said from behind them.

"Discord! I should've known you were behind this!" Celestia shouted out from the window. "You'll never get away with this!"

Discord laughed. "Oh, but I shall. I have two-thirds of the Elements-" He motioned to the Element of Honesty which was firmly wrapped around his arm. "-and you are powerless to stop me. We'll lead you on a merry chase round Equestria, Gryphonya, Dragostan, Zebrica,The Shivering Isles, Dunwall and Tartarus and maybe I'll even give you some help along the way..."

"You'll never leave Canterlot! My guards will arrest you, criminal scum!"

As if on cue, two guards came running around the corner, spears ready.

Gorgutz turned lazily and killed them easily with a well-placed burst of dakka.

"Wot ya goin to do now, Discord? I can't do much with only one Ork."

"Oh, there's a way around that." Discord pulled a map out of nowhere and handed it to the ork. "Head north-east of Canterlot until you find a massive wrecked thing. I've always been meaning to do something with it, but I never figured what."

A massive can of red spray paint appeared strapped to Ucky's back.

"And you'll be needing that. Now, I'm off to have a bit of fun, if you'll excuse me." Discord snapped his fingers and he vanished.

Ucky scratched his head. "What we'z gonna do now Boss?"

Gorgutz picked up the map his his klaw before saying "Runin, ya git. We'z gonna go get more boyz and more dakka."

With that, Gorgutz lumbered off in the direction the map had pointed, Ucky running alongside him while Celestia and the Mane Six stared on in a mixture if disbelief and horror.

And although there may be cliffs in the way, when has terrain stopped a ork?

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"What are we going to do now, Princess?" Twilight asked as she stared out the window at the rapidly retreating orks. "We can only defeat them with the Elements, and they have them..."

"I don't know, Twilight. But Discord wants entertainment, and those orks want... Something."

"Can't we just go beat them up? I could take em." Rainbow Dash suggested as she mimed hitting them with her hooves , forgetting she'd been utterly annihilated by Gorgutz back in Nightmare's castle.

"I'm afraid we can't win this battle with brute force, Rainbow Dash. The orks are simply too strong. Instead we must win through guile."

"Here's the plan..."

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"Can't ya slow down Boss?" Ucky panted as they ran through a forest similar to those on the Green Coast back on Kronus.

"Run fastah ya git, or paint ya armour red!"

"I'm runin as fast as I can Boss!"

"Wait! We'z there!" Gorgutz shouted as they skidded to a halt in front of a cave mouth.

"But deres nothin ere Boss."

"It's in da cave, ya Squig-Ead. Move!"

Gorgutz shoved Ucky forwards as they began to walk into the caves.

The tunnel was at least wide enough for several Leman Russ battle tanks to fit through and high enough too but it still stank of the highly-distinctive smell of leaking petrol and metal.

After a few minutes of walking, the two orks found themselves looking over a huge cavern, dominated by a towering but rust-stained metal object.

"Is dat... A humie ship?" Ucky asked.

Gorgutz simply nodded.

Gorgutz sprinted across the cavern towards the humie ship, walking around it while looking for a way inside.

After a few minutes of searching, Gorgutz eventually found, and promptly destroyed, a lone bulkhead that led into a hanger bay that ran the length of the ship.

After seeing what was inside, the only thing Gorgutz could say was "Well dats da dakka sorted."

A hundred Baneblades, still pristine despite the wear and tear on the ship around them, layed idle in the hanger painted in the greens of the 252nd Kauravan Regiment.

"Boss, where are we goin to get da boyz to ork dese tanks?"

"I'll sort dat out lata. Just paint these tanks red, Ucky. Den we'z go find more boyz or otha allies like dat Discord fella. Is Ead will make a nice addition to ma pointy stikk next to da eads of da big blu Squig and da otha big Squig."

"Yer gonna take dat Ead of his as well?"

Gorgutz rolled his eyes. "Well am I gonna put his foot on ma pointy stikk instead? I took Crull's Ead, dat Blud Reheven's Ead, Sturm's Ead, Talldeer's Ead and dat Tau commanda's Ead. Discord can't be dat ard, can he?"

"But ya never got da Necrons Ead, did ya Boss?"

"Discord ain't a walkin piece of machinery. I'll take his Ead good an propa."