Please Allow Me To Introduce Myself
In the seedy bowels of the city of Canterlot a hooded shape stole through the lengthening shadows that heralded the coming night. The figure paid no mind to any shady characters that it encountered, preferring to flit in and out of sight before anypony could even notice its passing. Besides, it had the market cornered on shadiness.
The figure found its way to a tiny hole-in-the-wall tavern, the sort that ponies and other creatures visited when they weren’t especially concerned about what they were drinking or whom they were drinking it with.
Inside the tavern was cold, dimly lit, and smelly. The bartender pointed to a door while simultaneously trying to pretend that he hadn’t seen the stranger. He certainly hadn’t glimpsed the menacing green eyes under the hood or the forked tongue as it traced over fangs that no pony should have.
It was safer not to notice such things. The bartender concentrated on his work and wished, as he had so many times before, that he hadn’t agreed to let the unholy creatures assemble in his back room. No amount of money could make up for the nightmares.
The meeting place was dingy as ever. A large round table sat in the middle of the room, gouged and torn with claw marks and worse. A collection of monsters, each more frightening than the last, sat and talked quietly amongst themselves while they waited for the meeting to begin. Chrysalis hung her coat by the door and took a seat next to Discord. The chair on her other side was empty. The draconequus was talking with Gilda, who had been the newest member of the group before Chrysalis started showing up a few weeks ago.
A midnight-black mare stood up from her seat and tapped her hoof on the table. “Order!” Nightmare Moon demanded. From what Chrysalis could gather she was actually Princess Luna, but it was not wise to ask such things in the present company. “The weekly assembly of dark powers will come to order!” Discord snickered, but she ignored him as usual. “We are scheduled to welcome an old friend tonight, but she has yet to arrive. Instead we shall proceed with the nightly affirmation of our mission.”
Chrysalis shivered in her chair. She was hardly a saint, but this group somehow managed to frighten her. Their motivations were strange and alien, and she was only now beginning to grasp the scope of what they wanted her to do. Was it really worth it? Could she devote herself to this, body and soul, knowing that such a thing would change her forever?
Nightmare Moon/Princess Luna levitated a large poster of Celestia’s smiling face off the wall and held it where everyone could see. Discord put two of his talons to his lips and let out an appreciative whistle. “That was not funny the first time and it is not funny now!” Nightmare Moon shouted. Most of the group disagreed with her if their laughter was anything to judge by.
The group rose from their seats and, with varying degrees of enthusiasm, began to chant.
“I was bad, but I can be good.
I will learn to treat others as I know I should.
Little by little and day by day
I will keep getting better in every way.
I know that there is good inside of me.
I am only as evil as I want to be.”
“Let us begin!” the dark mare proclaimed. She removed her helmet and sat it on the table, letting her mane flow freely. “We declare that…what?” She listened as Discord whispered in her ear. “Oh. Apologies; I think that it would be best if we started with sharing. Same drill as always, counterclockwise.”
The group went through the usual system of share-and-listen. Chrysalis waited patiently for her turn before standing up and taking a deep, calming breath. She had always passed on her turn, but today she felt ready. The group went completely silent when they realized that she was finally going to speak.
“I thought I had good reasons for what I did,” she said slowly. “Maybe I didn’t. Maybe I just wanted to feel like I was justified. I could have been more reasonable, I suppose. A peaceful solution might have been possible, but I didn’t bother to look for one. It was stupid to turn to violence when diplomacy might have worked just as well.”
Discord nudged Gilda with his elbow and pointed to Luna. A few of the other group members giggled. “Life was hard for a while,” Chrysalis continued. “I spent some time travelling with a trading caravan. I had to feed wherever I could, like some pathetic vermin scavenging through the garbage. It was unbelievably degrading.” Some of the more powerful entities in the room nodded in sympathy; they had all been humbled in one way or another.
“I became a stagehoof for a magician,” Chrysalis said. “She’s a wonderful mare. She’s not very bright, but she’s got a kind heart and we get along well. I don’t go hungry very often these days. She's taking her time, but I know she'll tell me how she feels soon."
The hardest part was still ahead. Chrysalis tried to brace herself for the unpleasant business of giving voice to the thoughts that had lingered in her mind ever since the wedding fiasco. "She's a good pony. She has a gentle nature, even if she gets a bit conceited sometimes. Sometimes...." The words stalled in her throat and Chrysalis felt tears of shame threatening to fall.
Discord put his paw on her shoulder. "We have all done things that we regret," Luna assured her. "Judgment has no place here. We are here to support one another, not tear each other down."
Chrysalis gathered her resolve. "Sometimes I don't feel like I belong with her. I feel like she can do so much better." The group was silent while Chrysalis gathered her final thoughts. "It’s not the life I had envisioned for myself, but it’s heaven compared to the alternative. Sometimes, purely by accident, I get to see one of my children. They all seem happy enough. Some of them have done far better for themselves than I ever did. We should have just peacefully integrated with Equestrian society from the very beginning, but I was too proud to even consider it. My pride nearly killed us. I f-f-failed my children.” She buried her face in her hooves, determined to get her emotions under control before she lost all semblance of decorum. It was a doomed effort.
Luna (or Nightmare Moon, Chrysalis still wasn’t sure how that worked) cleared her throat politely. “Thank you so much for sharing,” she said. “We think that…I think that I speak for all of us when I say that it can be hard to accept the things that we have done. Just remember that blaming yourself is never a good idea.”
“Because we tend to blame ourselves for things that aren’t our fault?”
Nightmare Moon chuckled. “Of course not. We do not play the blame game because everything was our fault, and thinking about it can be very depressing. Instead, devote yourself to making a good life for yourself and others here in Equestria. Equestria has a place for everyone….”
The group finished as one: “As long as everyone wants a place.”
“We should make a drinking game out of this,” Gilda muttered. “Obviously the moon isn’t the only thing that’s made of cheese.”
Chrysalis rolled her eyes. “That had better be directed at the princess.”
Gilda’s beak curled into a sneer. “You got something to say, cheese-flanks?”
“Don't try my patience, bird!” Chrysalis snarled. Her eyes glowed with emerald energy as the room’s temperature dropped. Some of the more coldblooded members of the group began to shiver uncontrollably. “I stood against Celestia herself! You can’t bully me around like a timid little pegasus.”
Gilda flushed and gritted her teeth as she tried to think of something clever to say. Eventually she had to settle for muttering “Dweeb” under her breath and sulking in her chair.
“Oh, very clever. Too bad Rainbow Dash wasn’t here for that.” Gilda tried to lunge over the table, claws extended, but Discord held her back. The griffon had to give up when it became clear that there was no way she could get past him.
Any pride that Chrysalis felt from her minor victory died when she saw Luna's look of disappointment. "Sorry," she grumbled.
"I am not the one that you should be apologizing to."
Chrysalis and Gilda traded sullen looks, each reluctant to be the first to apologize. Finally Gilda scratched an itch on her beak and, still refusing to make eye contact, muttered "Sorry."
"I'm sorry too." Chrysalis perked up as trumpets blared in the distance. "Does anypony else hear that?"
Luna clopped her hooves together in excitement. "Our guest hath arrived!" she announced. The rest of her words were lost as the doors flew open in a storm of colored streamers and fanfare. I know those trumpets, Chrysalis thought, her wings buzzing in agitation. Fog was pouring into the room to obscure the newcomer. She can't be here. My luck can’t possibly be that bad! A conjured breeze blew away the smokescreen to reveal a blue unicorn in a purple cape and matching hat. Oh Celestia, forgive me for my transgressions and deliver me not unto evil!
"The Great and Powerful Trixie has arrived!" the unicorn announced. "The proceedings may now begin!"
"We're almost finished with the proceedings," Gilda muttered. "Showoff."
Trixie ignored the griffon and sat down next to Chrysalis. Most of the creatures present assumed that she was turning the other cheek, but it was very possible that she really hadn't heard; Trixie was completely deaf in one ear due to an unfortunate accident with the fireworks used in her show. Chrysalis winced at the memory. It was wrong to feel responsible since she’d had nothing to do with the incident, but she couldn’t help it. Trixie had insisted on setting up the fireworks herself. If Chrysalis had been just a little more persuasive, or a little less lazy…That is a guilt trip for another day.
The group greeted Trixie as one and Luna introduced her to Chrysalis. "It's lovely to meet you," Trixie said as she extended a hoof. Chrysalis forced herself to smile while simultaneously wondering if she could convincingly fake a heart attack. Probably not; a changeling’s heart was vastly different from a pony’s and a heart attack wouldn’t be believable.
Now that the formalities were out of the way Trixie began her story. "Trixie has been doing very well for herself. The show has expanded and brings in more fans than ever before. Bits are practically raining from the skies wherever Trixie goes!"
Luna rapped her hoof against the table for attention. "W-I hate to interrupt, but you are speaking in the third person again."
Trixie's confident attitude disintegrated immediately. "I thought I was getting better about that," she mumbled. "Sorry." Luna motioned for her to continue. "As...I was saying, the show is doing well. I don't go hungry anymore. It even became necessary to a hire a stagehoof just to keep things in order. She’s a nice mare, but she doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut."
You traitorous wench!
"She likes me." Trixie unconsciously traced a circle in the table with one of her hooves, following a small groove that had been worn into the wood by hours of repetition. "I don't know what to think about that. She always loves to see me show off new tricks. I boast far less than I used to, but even when I lapse into the old ways she doesn't seem to mind. She seems wonderful."
I think my heart might melt, Chrysalis thought.
The smile that had grown while Trixie described her possible marefriend turned into a painfully awkward grimace. "Although I must say, she has terrible taste in clothing."
You said you liked my socks!
"And that's the only problem?" Gilda asked. "Just go for it, dude. Sweep her off her hooves or whatever."
"Trixie is not sure that she should." Trixie slapped her hoof down in frustration. "I am an annoying mare! I am good at alienating my friends! What if she gets tired of me?"
This has gone on long enough, the changeling queen decided. "She won't get tired of you that easily. If she really likes you, she'll be willing to accept you for who you are. That includes your faults. Trust me; I'm an authority on love."
"Did you not say that you were involved with a magician yourself?" Luna asked. "Perhaps you could go on a double date! That should alleviate some awkwardness."
"A performer?" Trixie asked suspiciously. "Has Trixie heard of this magician?"
Oh no. Nononono. "No, I never said that. I said she was a...you know what? It's warm in here. We should just call it a night and get some fresh air. The princess is probably just mistaken."
Luna frowned thoughtfully. "No, I am quite certain. You said that you were romantically involved with a simple-minded magician."
Chrysalis began to flutter her wings, trying to cause some sort of draft. Trixie leaned in uncomfortably close and began looking her over. "You seem very familiar. Have we met?"
"I must have one of those faces!" Chrysalis laughed anxiously. "Besides, I'm sure you've heard of me. There was that whole unpleasant business about a failed invasion and whatnot."
“Trixie was not present for the wedding. Are you certain that we have not met?” Chrysalis was already eyeing the room’s only exit when Trixie suddenly gave up on the conversation. “Perhaps I am imagining things,” she said. “My mother always told me that my imagination was prone to wandering.”
“As long as it comes home every now and then,” Chrysalis finished without thinking. She immediately clapped her hooves over her mouth, amazed that she had given herself away so easily.
Trixie jumped out of her chair and backed away from the table. “It’s you!” she shouted, pointing an accusing hoof. “Trixie knew it!”
Gilda rolled her eyes and prodded Discord. “Not to hear Chrys talk about it.”
“You said I was simple-minded?” Trixie shouted. “Tri-…I…you liar! Trixie is very intelligent!”
“Well then maybe Trixie should stop talking in the third person!” Chrysalis shot back. “Maybe you should learn to clean up after your shows!”
“Trixie is paying you!” the unicorn yelled. “You and your stupid puke-green socks can find your own place to live if you don’t like the arrangement!”
“If you didn’t like them, you should have said so!”
“You…you inconsiderate, self-righteous mule! If Trixie never sees you again it will be too soon!”
“Try calling me a mule to my face!” Chrysalis challenged.
“Trixie would, but it keeps changing!”
“Miserable old nag!”
“Scrawny self-absorbed whorse!”
Both mares charged each other at the same moment, colliding in a tangle of limbs and tumbling to the ground. They fought hard and dirty, pulling manes and even biting. Chrysalis had a distinct advantage in the biting category.
Gilda sighed and stepped in to break them up, but Discord barred her way. “Not yet,” he said. “Let them sort it out for themselves.” The griffon reluctantly stood by while the two mares fought, watching as they grew more and more frantic. Soon they were sweating and panting, still struggling for dominance and shouting insults over the commotion they caused.
After a few minutes Gilda nudged Discord, never taking her eyes off the display. “Perv,” she muttered.
“I’ll stop watching when you do.”
“Uh…huh.”
Luna finally lost her temper. Her horn glowed and the fighting mares were torn away from each other by a field of powerful magic. “That is enough!” she bellowed, falling back into the Olde Canterlot Voice. A diamond dog covered his ears and howled. “This behavior is unacceptable!”
“It’s her fault!” Trixie shouted. “She’s been lying to Trixie from day one! Trixie is probably just a meal to that…that thing!”
“I resent that!” Chrysalis said. “I’ve been waiting for you to make a move on me for months!”
“You just wanted a snack!” the wounded mare shot back. Chrysalis recognized the way she was absently toying with her mane; she was trying to distract herself so she didn’t start crying. “Trixie was nothing but a meal ticket while you set up another of your stupid invasion plans with your stupid, useless minions!”
Chrysalis was at a loss. The mare she loved was insulting her children. She was so angry that her eyes were already starting to tear up. She knew that it would be smarter to stop talking, but her temper was getting the better of her. Again. “W-Well you…you, uh…you were n-never much of a villain in the first place!”
An audible gasp filled the room, followed by silence. Gilda was the first to speak afterward: “Dude, harsh.”
Trixie’s trademark bravado failed her. She choked on whatever words she had been about to hurl back at Chrysalis and slowly backed away. “I didn’t mean that!” Chrysalis said quickly. “I’m sorry! I’m really, really sorry!” Trixie turned to run, but the changeling queen would have none of it. Chrysalis snagged the blue unicorn with her magic and dragged her into a hug.
“Let Trixie go!” Trixie cried. Her shoulders shook with sobs and her face burned with embarrassment. Chrysalis carried her out of the room, knowing how much she hated being embarrassed in front of other ponies. “I never want to see you again!” she continued. “You lied to Trixie! Just leave Tri-...leave me alone.”
Chrysalis refused to let go. Trixie struggled, but she was helpless against the changeling queen’s long legs and magic. “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner,” Chrysalis said. “I’m sorry for hurting you.”
Trixie didn’t give in, but she also didn’t pull away. “You never liked Trixie. You were just pretending. I should have known it was too good to be true.” Chrysalis pulled Trixie into a deep kiss, rendering her unable to complete her horrible thought.
“Trixie doesn’t know what she’s talking about,” Chrysalis whispered. “She’s wonderful and I love her. So there.”
They sat in silence until Trixie had stopped crying –which, in fairness to the unicorn, didn’t take long. “Would you have told Trixie?”
“Eventually.” Chrysalis nibbled on her ear. “I was afraid. I didn’t want to frighten you or drive you away.” She held out one of her porous legs for inspection. “Let’s face it; the change is a little jarring.”
“Agreed.” Trixie finally relaxed and leaned against the changeling queen. “Are you going to leave now?
“Not if you’ll still have me. Should we pick up where we left off before tonight? I could go back to being a pretty pink pegasus pony if you want.” Trixie tried to speak, but she couldn’t manage to force out the words. Her face turned rosy and she buried it in Chrysalis’s side. “Is something wrong?” Trixie mumbled something that was muffled by the queen’s carapace. “You’ll have to say that louder.”
The unicorn uncovered her face long enough to speak clearly. “T-Trixie has always, um, liked tall mares. They look regal.” Chrysalis giggled at her bashfulness. She loved seeing her magician stripped of all the poise and glamour of the stage. All that was left was a cute, surprisingly shy pony that had only recently managed to come to grips with the fact that she liked mares. “We should go now.”
Chrysalis agreed. She trotted into the back room to grab her cloak and threw it over her shoulders. She made certain to apologize to Luna for causing a scene and leaving early. The princess was very understanding.
Chrysalis and Trixie went home together, already talking about when they would come to see the group again. Maybe, Chrysalis thought, there could be a life for me here. I could be happy again, even if I don’t deserve it. She nuzzled Trixie while they walked. Or maybe I do. Equestria has a place for everyone, as long as everyone wants a place.
Trixie cleared her throat and tried to hide beneath the brim of her hat. “So um, about those socks…”
Long after the rest of the group had disbanded Discord and Luna locked the door behind them and set out for home. “That was an interesting session,” Luna remarked. “Normally things are not so violent.”
“Wasn’t it hilarious?” Discord giggled. He floated alongside her in total defiance of the laws of physics. “Gilda really needs to switch to decaf. I had to hold her back twice today. That’s almost one more time than usual.” He picked something out of his ear, examined it, and then tossed it away. “Did you see her staring?” he asked over the resulting explosion. It was a small one, and Luna made sure that no damage was done. “She’s such a perv.”
Luna elected not to comment. Discord was just being himself and she didn’t want to squash his enthusiasm. He pretended to only be attending their meetings to keep Celestia happy, but she could tell that he was secretly enjoying himself.
They reached the castle in short order, sometimes traveling by magical means to avoid being seen. Luna flew up to her balcony and hid her armor in the most secure place she could imagine: beneath her bed. Celestia knew that she was attending therapy, but not what she wore while doing so. Luna saw no reason to alarm her just because she was liked the way her old armor fit.
The pair found Celestia in the castle’s kitchens. “Why are you baking?” Luna asked as her sister levitated a tray of cookies out of the oven. “Do we not have kitchen staff?”
“Call it a hobby.” Celestia had to flip her mane out of the way and slid another tray of cookies into the oven. “How was your group?”
“It was acceptable,” Luna said. “A new member was willing to speak tonight.”
Celestia hugged her sister, not noticing that her armor had ruffled her coat in places. “I’m glad. I’m very proud of you, Luna; you’ve done a wonderful thing, giving so many misguided ponies a place to express themselves.”
“It was your idea,” Luna mumbled, but she hugged her sister back. “A moment, sister. Where is Discord?”
The princesses looked around with increasing unease; whenever Discord disappeared, something bad was bound to happen. It was usually just a harmless prank, but for an immortal ‘harmless’ could have any number of unpleasant meanings.
“Did he come home with you?” Celestia asked. She squealed in surprise as Discord appeared behind her and wrapped his arms around her neck. He lifted her into the air and spun her around, leaning over until she was almost touching the floor, and planted a firm kiss directly on her muzzle.
“Bleh!” Luna spat. “Should anypony require us, We will be vomiting.”
“Oh stop it,” Celestia giggled. “Hush and eat your cookies.” Luna sat at the table and munched on chocolate chip cookies while Discord filled her sister in on the night’s events in more detail. Soon Celestia remembered the batch that was still in the oven. “Oh, Luna!” she called as she slid them onto a tray to cool. “That nice Derpy mare called for you today. I told her you’d call her back.”
Luna discretely turned her chair so that her sister couldn’t see her blush.
Author's Note
This is sort of a sequel to Chrysalis Catches Cold. At least I consider it one. I seem to write about changelings a lot lately. Also I don't know where I first heard somebody use "whorse" as an insult, but my hat is off to that person. Very punny, sir.
Funny thing: this idea was already done. I was so pleased with myself for coming up with it after seeing the trailers for Wreck It Ralph, then when I was almost finished with it I happened to stumble across another support group story. Oh well.
What did you guys think of the season finale? It sure was…something, right? I still don’t know what to think about it. Personally I think next season will be way better overall. Without having to worry about fitting everything into a smaller number of episodes I’m sure the writers won’t have to make everything feel so rushed. If we honestly try to give alicorn Twilight a chance and trust the show’s writers, we’ll have nothing to worry about. Except for Discord, because he’s still out there somewhere. Is…is nobody watching this guy? I’m just saying, he’s a mad god with poor impulse control. Might want to keep tabs on him.
As always, let me know what I can do better in the comments. Thanks for reading!
