Ernest Goes to Equestria

It was a normal day in the neighborhood. Vern was watching tv when a knock came at his door and opened it and found his neighbor Ernest P. Worrell there.

"Hey Vern! Did you hear the news? Two little kids fell down a hole and then disappeared without a trace. We gotta go save them, knowwhatImean?! Come on!" He shouted and then ran off with Vern right behind him.

Ernest lead Vern to the forest to the hole and said,

"Here's the hole Vern. My daddy once told me about a hole like this. Anybody who fell down it was never heard from again. It's a mystery Vern, knowwhatImean? Now, I tied this rope that's attatched to this fishing pole. I want you to lower me down into the hole so I can find the missing kids and be a hero. You got all that Vern?" He asked.

Vern shook his head but Ernest said,

"Good. Here I go."

He then jumped down into the hole and Vern grabbed the pole and tried pulling him back up to slow him down but couldn't and suddenly the entire pole was pulled in and all that was heard was Ernest's screaming.

Ernest was falling down the hole as fast as he could count. Twirling around pipes, jumping across gaps, tumbeling down slides. Eventually he was shot out of the ground and fell on his head. He then got up and dusted himself off like it was nothing.

"What the hey just happened there? One minute I'm trying to save the kids. The next I fall down it and suddenly I'm in the 16th century. That hole must have been a time portal. I know what I have to do... Go talk to the king and queen and convince them to give me a job." Ernest said to himself. He then looked up to see the moon shining and had a picture of pony with a horn on it.

"Hm. That ain't something everyday and I know cause I've been to the moon." The blabbermouthing jokester said. He then saw that the stars were sort of aligning to each other and then saw the picture on the moon disappear.

"What the?" Ernest said confused.

"She's gone!" Someone shouted. Ernest heard the voice coming from the place he suspected as the Town Hall and walked up to it and put his ear up to the door. He heard people screaming and shouting and suddenly a poof and then gasping.

"What's going on in there?" He asked.

"Oh no... Nightmare Moon." Someone whispered.

'Nightmare Moon? Must be some kind of creature from the fourth dimension.' Ernest thought to himself,

"Don't worry everybody! I'm gonna save you!!! On the count of three I'm gonna break down these doors."

He then backed up a good couple feet and counted to three and shouted,

"Ernest P. Worrell to the rescue!!!!!"

He then took off charging but didn't noticed the doors open on themselves and then slip on something and crash into a buffett table. He got up wearilly and said,

"It's alright. I'm okay."

He then saw a bajillion colorful ponies everywhere. He then rubbed his eyes and bit to see if he was dreaming.

"Huh. Colorful ponies. Who knew there were colorful ponies in the 16th century?" He asked himself.

"What is that thing?" He heard one of them say.

"Hey Vern, It's... Talking Ponies!" Ernest shouted,

"I knew there were talking ponies in the 16th century. Greetings... I am Ernest P. Worrell. I come from the future and I mean you NO harm."

Twilight was took her attention from Nightmare Moon and was observing Ernest.

'A human? I thought they were just a part of mythology. But a REAl one here in Ponyville I have so many questions for it.' She thought to herself.

"How dare you interrupt me you welp!!!" Nightmare Moon shouted.

Ernest looked up to see a tall dark pony with wings and a horn and armor. Plus some mist around it.

"And just who in the name of Amelia Earheart are you?" He asked.

"I am Nightmare Moon. And remember this day for now the night will last FOREVER!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!"

"Not. Just, Yet." Ernest said.

"You dare defy me? You'll throw your life away and shame your forefathers!" The mare in the moon shouted.

"I didn't have four fathers! I only had one father and I didn't know him that well!" The accident prone hero shouted.

"Whatever. I shall smite thee." Nightmare Moon said,

"You'd better stay away. I know jujitsu, kung fu, karate, tai chi, and I saw "Hulkamania" three times. Once in slow-mo." Ernest said.

He then did a whole bundle of karate moves, chops and kicks to intimidate her.

"Seize her! Only she knows where the princess is!" Mayor Mare shouted.

Two guard ponies then flew up to try and apprehend her.

"Stand back, you foals!" Nightmare Moon shouted and shot an electricity spell which hit the guard ponies.

"Whoa. Now that was shocking." Ernest joked,

"That's a pretty good move. But you can you do this?"

Suddenly he lit up his finger and fire appeared and he wasn't burnt.

"Hm. I don't have time for this. But mark my words... Strange creature. You will soon suffer the wrath of Nightmare Moon!" The dark alicorn shouted and then turned into mist and flew off.

"Come back here! [pants] Nighttime? Forever? Where's she going? " Rainbow Dash panted.

"I don't know." Ernest said.

"Wait a minute. You're that creature from inside. Who and what are you?" The blue pegasus asked.

"Ernest P. Worrell at your service. I'm whatcha call a human being. We're pretty smart and I happen to come from the future. The year 1998 to be precise. I jumped into a time portal and here I am in the 16th century." The bumbling human said.

"16th century? It's the year 1000." Rainbow Dash said.

'O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o. One Thousand?! I think I'm gonna faint." Ernest said and that's exactly what he did.