Recolection letter to Celestia
Jo Testarossa
11/24/12
Recollection letter to Celestia
“Nothing makes sense!” I yelled as I pace in circles in the middle of my home. I was frustrated, you would be too if you had one though in your mind all day and no matter what you did to prove it wrong it stayed there tormenting you. Suddenly Spike came down the stairs, his face showed confusion and I knew exactly what words were going to come out of his mouth next.
“Why are you yelling Twilight? What doesn’t make sense?”
I explained the situation to Spike only to have him ask what the thought was. This is where I became tense. I didn’t know whether to tell him or not. I had never told him that I was a fillyfooler before so I would probably have to explain that first, moreover, I would probably have to explain what a fillyfooler was so he would actually understand. My second reason on debating to tell him was that this though was about Rarity; Spike is a bit… okay. He is really weird when he is around her, sometimes I see him start to float around behind her and that is just creepy, because he likes her even though he already knows it will never happen due to age difference and the fact that he is a dragon and she is a pony he still hopes it will one day become real.
I didn’t want to hurt him so I didn’t tell him. I made up a fake situation about some random test that the princess had given me and told him I needed to go out for a while. He accepted the story and went back upstairs to take a nap seeing as today was his day off.
While out I began to ponder the idea of me and Rarity together again and shouted in anger because the thought had entered my mind once again. I decided that I needed help from a friend, somepony who has already gone through this kind of thing, Applejack, but as I walked towards Sweet Apple Acres I ran into Fluttershy as she was walking home from the market.
“Hello Twilight, how are you today?” she said with a kind smile on her face.
I answer honestly to my shy friend. “I’m not doing too well Fluttershy. I’ve had this one thought stuck in my head all day and no matter what I do to prove it wrong it still comes back.”
She looked at me with concern written all over her face as she asked me if I wanted to come over to her cottage and talk about it too see if that would help my case. I knew that I wanted to talk to Applejack to see how she got together with Rainbow Dash, but I needed every chance I was presented so I thanked her and followed her home.
Once at Fluttershy’s cottage she began to make some tea for us as I sat down. She came in with the cups of warm mint tea and sat down across from me. I tell you one thing; her house was a beautiful one. The environment was just so peaceful and open; it felt good to be in her home. I had doubts about Fluttershy being able to help me, but I quickly got rid of them as soon as I entered her house.
“So, what’s been on your mind Twilight, I mean... if you want to share that is.” After a couple of years of being friends she still was so timid, yet I knew not why.
“Well… so you already know that I’m a fillyfooler right?” She nodded in acknowledgement and motioned for me to continue. “So, over the years I have felt something… something more than just a desire for friendship. I have felt the need to be in a relationship with a certain somepony, but I, one, don’t know if she feels the same way about me, and two, Don’t know if it would even work out between us. I like her a lot, but there are so many differences between us that it just doesn’t seem possible for us to become a couple… you know what I mean?” I finish with a sigh as I take a drink of the tea she had given me.
“Twilight, if you don’t mind me asking that is, could you please tell me who it is you have feelings for?”
“To tell the truth Fluttershy, I’d like to keep her anonymous for now if I could.”
“I understand. Twilight, it seems that you’ve been doubting yourself a lot, but… that’s just my opinion. I would start by figuring where you stand with this certain somepony, like… are you friends with her, are you close or distant, like that. I wish I could offer more advice, but I’m going out on a limb as it is with what I’ve already suggested, I’m sorry Twilight but that’s really all I’ve got. Sorry.”
I nodded in acceptance and got up. I thanked Fluttershy for the tea and advice, and left.
Once I left I began to walk through the park. I needed time to think so I quickly found the nearest open bench and sat down. Next to me was a teal mare. She began to strum her hooves against her lyre so that the soft calming music began to enter all of the ears near it. The music was slow and sweet. It was like a lullaby and, just as a lullaby should, it slowly made me drift off into sleep.
****
I was in my bedroom. I could hear spike snoring as he lay peacefully in his bed, but something was different. Over the years I realized that it was almost always cold in my house because of all the moisture that the tree held inside of it and usually I would feel a bit chilly even if I was under my blankets, but it was different this time. I felt something to the other side of me, something soft and warm. It was comfortable, but still confusing as to what it was. I began to feel around to see if I could get any clues as to what was next to me, and then I felt it. I felt the hoof of the pony next to me. I turned to see who it was and I saw her. I saw Rarity next to me.
****
I awoke to find that the mare had left. I was alone on the park bench at what seemed to be eight at night. The moon shone brightly on the park giving everything a soft, beautiful, glow like no other. I really have to hand it to Luna, she really does make wonderful nights. I sat staring at the sky and gazing at the many constellations that could be found and then, just like in my dream, I felt warmth at my side.
It was her, the mare that I had been dreaming about for so long. She smiled and looked up at the sky. Her delicate white coat shined in the moon light and her long, curly, mane fell beautifully to her side.
My heart started to beat faster. What was I supposed to do? I wasn’t ready to talk to her yet. I still needed time to think, time to figure out what I needed to say.
She broke the silence “It is a great night tonight don’t you think Twilight?”
I nodded my head in response. What the hay, even her voice was attractive?!
She stopped looking at the sky and turned to me. She had something to say, I could tell that something was on her mind. I swallowed hard and took a deep breath. This was it, the time that I would have to say something.
We both started at the same time.
“Rarity”
“Twilight”
We both motioned for the other to go first but rarity insisted that I go.
“I… I don’t really know where to begin. Over the past few months, I have been admiring you from afar. There are feelings that I can’t, or don’t know how to, describe… Rarity…. What I’m trying to say is that… I like you… A lot and I want to be more than friends.”
She was in shock and I was scared. I was scared of her reaction; just looking at her face gave me thoughts of the worst possible thing happening between us. I could see thoughts of fights, of pure hatred. I didn’t want to lose one of my best friends but I couldn’t help thinking that I just did.
Her expression finally changed after about a minute. She took a deep breath and, to my surprise, began to smile. She began to lean on me.
“Twilight” she began after a few moments of silence “Are you free next weekend?”
That weekend she and I got together and throughout the day we continued to speak and have a good time. We ended up talking about why it took me so long to confess my feelings. It ended up coming down to what Fluttershy told me, I had doubted myself the entire time.
I guess that the moral of this letter is that you shouldn’t doubt yourself. Sometimes you shouldn’t over think things and go with your instincts.
Your faithful student
Twilight Sparkle
