Just an idea.

by DAT GUY

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Human, Comedy
Length: 2099

Elbert Einstein ends up in Derpy's body, how will Twilight react to this.

Just an idea, may continue it may not, rather have a author more talented than I do it though.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-07 01:45:11 UTC

Chapter 1

"Here Derpy, I think I see the muffin recipe book over there" Twilight said pointing to a nearby shelf.

"Spike, can you go get that book for Derpy?" Twilight asked.

"Sure" Spike said as he climbed up the book shelf.

Unfortunately it made the whole book shelf fall down , on Derpy.

"Ahh!!!" Dery said. Then silence.

"SPIKE HELP ME GET HER OUT" Twilight yelled.

They had both cleared the books away. Spike had gotten a first aid kit.

---somewhere else-----------

"...AND ZAT,  My dear friend Veginar , is how I faked my death, what was your story, you got frozen in ice by a blizzard?" I said, as I finished my tale, apearently he had fallen asleep after I told him how i wondered what a beam of light would like like if you ran alonge side it.

"...well.....I'm going to get some sleep now" I said as I headed to my room of R.O.S.   ROS is a secret organisation , it stands for  Retirementhome of Scientists.

Basicly, famous scientist fake their death and work/relax in peace, away from the public.

I headed over to my room , which had "EINSTEIN"  engraved on the door.

I walked over and lay down in my bed and thought"Tomorrow I think I'll go and find Steve Jobs, I would enjoy his company as much as he would mine.

"Just hope he doesn't pull a "genius bar" joke" I thought as I drifted to sleep.

-----Back to MLP---------

"AUHHH" was heard from under the books.

Twilight had finally cleared away all the books.

"Are you ok?" Twilight asked.

To the face down Derpy.

"I think, but how did I end up under all these books?" I asked.

Then I looked up.

"ahhhhh who they hell are you!!!!" I yelled as I saw a purple pony.

"Derpy!!!" Twilight yelled.

"WHAT?" I yelled back.

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY BODY!!!" I yelled as I looked down.

"Derpy!!!, I think you have amnesia, amnesia is when-" she began in a voice you would talk to a stupid person In.

"Im not a simpleton" I said.

"Well your not the Brightest bulb In the carton" Twilight said , she than realized I used a "big" word.

*rap voice*

"Cuz im not a bulb ima photon , a quanta of light, my mind out shines the sun while you can't even fight, I goin so fast I'm energy , I'm  hangin with the muons and the string theory,

If  the cat in the box could have talked , it would have simul-taneous  dissed you and beet you in rap"  I rapped.

"What??? DERPY!!!,  YOUR NOT THAT SMART!!!" Twilight exclaimed.

"That's cuz I'm not Derpy I'm Albert Einstein" I said.

"SPIKE COME QUICKLY!!!" Twilight yelled.

Spike quickly ran in.

"Whoa, never seen your eyes straight before, Derpy" Spike said to me.

"That's because I'm not DERPY!!" I growled angrily.

"Thats what's the problem" Twilight said.

"That's not Derpy" Twilight said.

"Why do you keep calling me Derpy!" I asked.

"Well um, you were  Derpy before the books fell on you" Twilight explained.

"WHAT DID YOU DO WITH DERPY!!!" Spike yelled.

"You think I did that?, why would I want to a) be a horse , b) I'm retired!"

I replied.

"YOUR NOT A PONY!!!" Twilight exclaimed as she got a notebook out.

"I wasn't, but apparently not anymore" I said as I gestured to my body.

"What where you before than?" Twilight asked.

"I was a human" I said.

Spike and Twilight gasped.

"Bu-t humans are myths!!" Twilight stuttered.

"So are horses with genes that don't a cur in nature that allow them to, Talk, be purple, have a horn, have advanced thought" I said.

"What?, but I'm real!" Twilight said.

"as am I" I said back.

"Where am I any way, in a library?" I asked.

"Yes, Ponyvilles only library!" Twilight said.

I walked by the science section and said"Meh".

"What don't you like science?" Twilight said offended.

"No it's just thats the basic stuff" I said.

Twilight gaped.

"But that's the most advanced in the field!" She exclaimed.

"Well I'm currently doing quantum physics and nuclear fusion" I said back.

Twilight looked amazed.

"But that's at lest  100 years more advanced!"she said.

"Are you some kind of scientist?" Twilight added.

"Legally a genius" I said with a smirk.

"Wow, spike a think you should sent letters to my friends" Twilight said.

"ok" Spike said and burned some letters.

-----Dos friends---------

------POV o Rambo bash (get it?)--

"I wonder what Twilight wants us for?" I said as I flew above there heads.

"Ya , Rainbow Dash, wunder wut she needs" Apple jack said.

"Well well find out what the dilemma is  in a few minutes" Rarity said as they neared the library.

They knocked on the door and spike let them in.

They were extremely shocked at what they saw. Here was Derpy, the slow mailmare, besting Twilight at science.

"And ZAT is how energy equals mass times the speed of light squared." Derpy said as she pointed to and extremely large and confusing equation on a chalk board with "E=mc^2" under it.

Twilight had the expression of an amazed school child.

Then Rarity spoke up.

"How is this possible, Twilight?" She asked.

"This is the reason you are here" Twilight began.

----POV   A.E-----

"It appears that when some books fell on Derpy,  her mind was pushed to the side and somepony else's mind got pulled in. " Twilight explained.

"Aheam, someone's" I coughed.

"Yes someone's" She corrected.

"WHATTTT???" Rainbow dash yelled.

"Who's in Derpy's body than?" Fluttershy said quietly.

"ZAT would be me, Albert Einstein" I spoke up.

"Albert this is , Rarity, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie" Twilight introduced quickly.

"Albert? That's a funny name!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Pinkie Pie!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Well Pinkie Pie is a funny name for a miniature horse of unnatural pigment" I retorted.

 "Hey!" Pinkie Responded.

"You talk as if you aren't one" Rarity commented.

"Because I wasn't" I said.

"What!?" They exclaimed.

"Is your vocabulary linited to that?" I questioned.

"Uh, no, Darling" Rarity said first.

"Oh, Where are my manners, I'm Rarity" said pony,said.

Because someone likes my story

"Is there any reason why your mane has the photonic value of 400 nano meters" I asked.

"Come again?" Rarity said.

  Twilight was  grinned like she just discovered perpetual motion.

"400 nanometers is purple!!! Rarity!" Twilight exploded.

"What ever that means,... why yes, my mane is purple because it's stylish" Don't you think?

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" I left it at.

"Do you always think so deeply?" Twilight asked.

"I have been known to completely ignore the physical world while I'm thinking" I said.

"ME TO!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Also Rarity I am world renown for my hair" I said as an after thought.

"What kinda of style?, see Twilight, Scientist can be Fabulous too!" Rarity said with a Victorian era accent.

I smiled in amusement.

"By not combing my hair" I said with a grin.

"What!" Rarity said.

Rarity seemed to have sudden respiratory disability.

"My hair is what one would describe as mad-scientist" I explained.

Then a sectionalized  light lengths quadrupedal carbon based life form came up to me. In short, a rainbow colored pony.

"HI IM RAINBOW DASH, fastest flyer in Eqestria, I can break the sound AND light barrier." Boasted said pony.

"To break the sound barrier would imply that you can go faster than

340.29 miles a second, or that the atmosphere here is extremely cold." I stated.

"To break the light barrier would imply that you are ether energy or have infinite energy and mass, and that would only get you to the speed if light, the latter stating that you would be infinitely  fatter than all of us combined" I said with my old Einstein charm.

Only Twilight had fallen over Laughing.

"HAY!!! I am not FAT!!!" Rainbow dash said with anger.

"Well you see mr.Einstein, when she goes fast enough there is a boom and then a rainbow following her" Said a soft voice.

"Hmm" I said.

I then thought for a moment.

"Perhaps you have water vapor high in you atmosphere and  a dense gas in your lower  atmosphere, when she goes fast enough she is able to break the barrier and the void causes the light to refraction at a faster pace  causing a rainbow" I theorized.

Twilight was writing something down.

"How long did that take you to come up with?" Twilight asked.

"Just now" I said.

Twilight's jaw seemed to unhinge.

"Oh I never got your name! Flutter shy right?" I asked.

"Yea, there call me that because in shy and can't do much like a butter fly" Flutter shy said sadly.

"A butterfly flapping it's wings on one side of the world could cause a hurricane on the other" I consoled.

"Really, but wouldn't that hurt somepony" She said looking up, slightly less sad.

"Thats not the point, it's that even small details can cause great change latter on, like if you informed ponies about fire safety you could end up saving  millions latter on"  I explained.

She looked up happily and hugged me.

I was slightly taken aback.

"Im sorry!" she said quickly after she hugged me.

"No,No, it's just that I have witnessed things no man should have to, and have had to  make choices  no man should have to make"said.

"What do you mean" she said sadness I her voice.

"Hitler, Hitler happened" I said.

"Hitler?" Asked Fluttershy.

"Most elitist man ever to live, the people he

deemed that were inferior, where killed in the  brutalist  ways" I said Sadly.

"Killed?.." She trembled.

"I have lost many a friend to the Nazi party, to be worked to death , to be gassed, to have to move the bodies or your loved one..." I choked.

"... Or to simply be shot and shoved in a hole, but worst of all, to have the bodies of your lived ones burn in a oven" I whispered.

Fluttershy was beyond trembling.

"How could somepony be so evil" She asked.

"Even I don't know, but with great evil there is also great good in the world" I stated.

"Gondi, a wise man, a non violent protester" I stated.

"He sounds nice" Fluttershy said less sad.

"Jonny apple seed, he helped tame North America, one day he just got up , left home, and traveled the country planting apple trees, he respected all life, to the point where he tried eating dirt because apples are living things too, didn't work" I reminisced.

"Jonny Apple seed, seems like ma kinda feller" The one called Applejack said.

"I presume your an apple farmer" I asked.

"Yup, me and y'all ma family" she said.

"Ya should come ova sum time" Apple jack said.

"Perhaps when I'm in my own skin" I said.

"About that, we might be able to use trace detecting return spell combined with a transformation and switch incantation" Twilight said.

I just looked at with a "Bitch please" face.

"Magic ins't  real" I said in a belittling voice.

There was a collective gasp.

"BUT it is!" Twilight said.

"I'll even prove it" she said.

Then she did something I didn't expect. She made a book levitate.

"AMAZING" I said, as I dived into the deep reassess of thought.

"For a organic creature to be able to naturally use quantum physics combined with a slight dart matter out put to be able to reverse the effects of gravity, while the light is likely to be caused by some kinda of  particle out put, this is amazing, arguably easy to mistake for magic" I thought out loud.

Twilight seemed started, and dropped the book.

"what's  quantum physics?" She asked.

"It has to do with particle movement, as you must know, certain elements have a chance of decaying after specified amount of time, but WHY is it random, Quantum physics. Normal physics would hold true if ply's constant didn't exists. You see the matter is decayed and not decay at the same time due  quantum physics, it takes a state once you observe it" I lectured.

"Wow...." Twilight said with wide eyes.

"Magic might actually be fake" she said, and fainted.

"Ow, dat make ma head urt thinking bout it" Applejack said.

The pinkie spoke up.

"Never though I'd see the day when Twilight gets lectured, I KNOW, we should have a "TWILIGHT-GETS-LECTURED" party, LOOK OUT FOR FLYING PIGS!!!" Pinkie exclaimed and hopped away.

"You sure are smart" Rarity said.