Okay, So i'm where?

by DJconcrete

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Slice of Life, Romance, Comedy
Length: 1628

the story of what happens when a regular local Chef get plunged into a strange new world...

Connor Stewart is just your average british guy. he has a steady job which he loves, an amazing girlfriend, a great family and is well on his way to his dream of owning his dream Harley Davidson. however, after a devestating accident which should have left him dead, he wakes to find himself in a strange new world inhabited by sentient ponies. how will he adjust to this new lifestyle? will he get home, or is he stuck in this new land?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-10 18:30:01 UTC

chapter 1 - accident

chapter 1 - life

Well, here I am again. The same restaurant I've worked in for near on a year now. The cluttering of pots and pans fills my ears, with an ancient boom box playing away subtly in the back ground. The rich aroma of various dishes fills my nose pleasently. People have always said to me,

"Connor, when you work in a kitchen, you either lose your appitite completely, or it doubles."

Unfortunately for me, it doubled, meaning I either go running four days a week (yeah, like hell im gonna do that!) or i have to just learn to control myself (something that sounds easier than it really is).

Looking around the kitchen, I smile softly to myself. Jack is in the corner on potwash, getting absalutely soaked. Pans slowly bubble and simmer behind me. Richard chops quickly to the right of me. Glancing over, I flinch at how close his fingers are to the blade of his knife.

"You're gonna take a finger off one of these days, dude." I quip, loud enough for him to hear me, but not so loud that Chef hears me as he pain-stakingly makes creme brulee to the far left of me in the dessert prep area.

"Ask me if I care." He replies glumly, a sad, almost depressed look covers his face.

"Woah, what's up with you? You look like someone has just died." As soon as I said this, I really hope that he doesnt turn around and say someone did die like that one scene in friends.

"I'm just fed up, man." He answers. "I mean, here I am, busting my arse trying to make just a little bit of money, to go home to a tiny, cold flat. I don't go out, have nothing for myself to enjoy, no girlfriend and stuck in a dead end career."

Damn... I dint think things was that bad for him.

"You know something, rich? There's one thing you've gotta do when life is being such a bitch as it is to you."

"And what's that?" He asks, with a sarcastic tone. I look down to make sure i wasnt burning anything.

"You need to look forward with a possitive head on your shoulders. Yeah, life is being a bastard, but if you can hold your head up high, and say you've worked hard for what you want, things will begin to pick up!" I was trying my damned hardest to cheer my co-worker up. mainly for two reasons, I hate to see people sad, and being down lowers your concentration, meaning he could end up losing a finger, and I dont feel like filling out incedent reports.

"You know what? You're right, man. Thanks" He replies in a much chirper tone.

"No problem, dude"

Rich then picks up whatever it was he was chopping and drops it into a pan.

"So what about you, mate?" He asks.

"What you mean?"

"Ya know, iv'e told you my life story. tell me yours."

"Well, I've always known i was going to work with food. Ever since i was a kid. I grew up with my dad after my parents split, went to school, got average results, and got a job. Thats bout it really. I hope to get into a better restaurant soon though, this place is hardly gourmet."  As i said this, Richard let out a small laugh. Mission acomplished.

The kitchen radio was playing an old favourite of mine, which I was caught up in singing. Much to chef's displeasure.

"Connor! Stop pissin' around and get some work done! Where's my chicken a la king?" I was sick to my back teeth of hearing that same bloody voice. I love chefing, but head chef is a bit of a slave driver.

"Right here, Chef." I reply.

"About bloody time. SERVICE!"

I look at the clock on the wall. 19:45.

Roll on nine o'clock.

~~~~

Quiting time. At long last. Time to hit the road, get home and just chill with a cold one. I pull my helmet over my head, slip my gloves on, and strike up my ride. It sure ain't glamourous, just an 80cc scooter, but it gets me from A to B.

Clicking play on my iPod, I hear a  farmiliar song fills my ears as I pull away. Because of the time, there was nothing on the road, and I was in the mood for a run, so I take a slight detour through the woods. The trees are a dark blur as i take the winding roads, the rise and falls, the various potholes i dodge, the stray cow in the road... WHAT?

I swerve violently to avoid hitting the creature, taking the small bike off road. The bike judders and bounces over the many twigs and branches, and i struggle to stay on the saddle. I suffer many cuts and gashes from the branches, thankful that my helmet provides protection for my face.

The bike suddenly falls away from underneath me, as it hurdles over the edge of a rock face. A sharp tree branch slices through my chest on the way down. I've never felt such intense pain in my life. I slowly close my eyes as i free- fall down the cliff to my immanent doom. All I could think about was all the things i would never do. Get my Harley, Go to the USA, get married, have kids, see my girlfriend again, it was all going to end here. Now. I just wish i could have said goodbye to everyone. With that last thought, I hit the ground. Hard. I fell head first, meaning my helmet shattered into thousands of pieces. Supprisingly, I feel nothing. It's all just so numb. I slowly open my eyes, not knowing i had closed them in the first place. What i saw horrified me. My bike was in a thousand and one pieces and covered in dirt and my own blood.

Great. That means my insurance is going through the roof.

I dare to look down at my body, and find it in even worse condition than the bike. I have many deep cuts across my body,as it tore through my black leather coat with ease, all of which are bleeding heavily. Both my arms and legs are broken in multiple places, causing them to be severly mis-shapen, and my whole torso curved severly, meaning my back was broken.

Meh. I think to myself. I'm sure someone will have had it worse

Suddenly, a deep coldness surrounds my body, as my vision slowly blurrs and fades.

This is it. Goodbye world

[center~~~~]

Darkness. All i see is Darkness. Wait, why can i see anything at all? I should be an unrecognisable mess of guts by now. What the hell is going on? Suddenly, I take on a falling sensation, although where i was falling to was anyones guess. I slowed to a stop, as a bright white light approached me. It grew bigger and brighter, forcing me to shield my eyes.

"That was quite the accident, was it not?"

WHAT THE FUCK? Ok, now im completely insane. I'm here, in a void of nothingness, with a ball of talking white light. Now im no expert on religions, but im sure none of them said anything about this in the afterlife.

"Uhh... i guess so." I answer suspiciously.

"There is no need to worry, young human. I am not foe." That voice, such a warm, mothering tone. I always had god down to be male.

"So where am I? And also, who are you?"

"You are somehere inbetween life and death. As for my identity, that isn't important as of yet. What is important is my offer to you." Sounds interesting.

"Lemmie hear it."

"As things stand, you have two options. One, your spirit can move on to the higher plane of existance here in this universe, or I can offer you a new life, in a completely new world." Wow, talk about luck.

"A new world you say? Sounds like a good idea. But why are you doing this for me? I'm nobody important. I'm just a commis Chef from Northern England!" If I was going to this new world, I wanted to know why I had this offer.

"I see potential in you. You could be of great use to this new place."

"Okay, so you want to use me? Gee, thanks." To my suprise, she let out a small chuckle.

"Not exactly, no. I'm offering you this second chance because you were destined for great things on your world and that was snatched a way from you due to a stray cow. I wish to see that potential blossom into something beautiful." Damn. She had me there.

"Right, ok." I had no idea on what else to say. "So are you god?" again she lets out a small chuckle.

"Not quite. Though I have many admirers in my world."

Ok, enough messing around. It's time to do this.

"Ok. I accept your offer."  I tell her, "on one condition."

"And what would that be?"

"That you tell me who the hell you are when i get there. Wherever the hell there actually is."

"Very well, young human. You will be sent to your new home shortly." She answered as she slowly started to fade away.

"But be warned, Connor Stewart, you may recive quite the shock when you awaken."

"Okay, thanky- wait, what?"

"So long, and good luck." And with that, she faded completely and i was left in the darkness of... Pugatory, I guess. As the darkness surrounded me once more, I felt my eyes slowly close, and felt the sensation falling come over me again.