Friendship is Useless

by Palamon

Rating: everyone
Tags: Tragedy, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1615

Dear Princess Celestia. I'm sorry that I have let you down, but I can longer perform magic. No, Princess... I can't even locate my horn. I've been degrated to an earth pony.

When Twilight Sparkle performs a spell that takes over her molecular structre, she becomes an earth pony. Little does she know that there is no possible way to reverse the spell and whomever currently posesses her horn only recieved half the power. So Twilight has to live her life as an earth pony from now on. The only problem is she doesn't know how...

Published 2013-03-14 02:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-14 02:20:01 UTC

Chapter 1; What is Friendship?

It was a fairly early Tuesday morning. Twilight Sparkle could be found on her bed going through spell book after spell book after spell book. The unicorn had a tremendous amount of spells to study and learn by Friday night, but despite the amount of times she has practiced she hasn't gotten the spells even remotely close to right.

What was she doing wrong? That was the hard part; she did not know. She had all the components correct, the spell plan correct, and everything else correct, but perhaps she was missing something gradually important. But there was little time. Twilight had to master them for her forthcoming magic exam. No matter what the circumstance Twilight had to master the spells or Princess Celestia would have every absolute right to fail her.

She sighed and read the first book again, studying and attempting to master the spells from square one. She narrowed her concentration, her horn began to glow a prominent brilliant raspberry color. The spell had begun. As the spelled was being performed Twilight had grown tired. Slowly but surely the energy from her horn was depleting, the aura from her horn had gotten dimmer and dimmer until the aura was no more.

"It's no use Spike," she sobbed. "I can't do it. I can't do the dragon conversion spell." Putting the spell book down, Twilight crouched down and sobbed some more. "I give up..."

Spike looked directly into Twilight's eyes. He wondered if she was lying or just joking with him--Twilight Sparkle never gives up. He knew Twilight had the answer to everything and could do anything if she tried her hardest, but what was with her suddenly giving up like that? That thought bewildered him.

"You're going to give up just like that?" Spike asked in the form of double checking.

Twilight focused her attention on Spike. He's right, she thought. What will Princess Celestia think of me if I suddenly give up? I have to find a way to get around this spell... Twilight began to rethink her decision of giving up, she came to a conclusion quickly as time was still quite limited. She perked up and faced Spike with a new form of determination.

"I've got it Spike! I've found a way around the spell!" she screeched with determination.

Spike gave her a look, but he knew deep down that this was her way around of not giving up. "...And that would be?" he asked.

"Instead of converting you into a pony I'm going to turn myself into a dragon!" she said with determination. "Stand back, Spike! I have no idea what this might lead to!" Twilight began to focus and concentrate until her horn glowed the brilliant raspberry color again. The magic surrounded Twilight's body and slowly took over her molecular structure. Twilight tried her hardest to keep still and continue on concentrating...

The magic had gotten longer in string and power, until something seemingly exploded. The explosion caused the spell to end abruptly. For a moment, Twilight hesitated wondering if the spell worked on her. Twilight looked at Spike and then looked at her surroundings. Nothing seemed to be different. Everything seemed to be the same, and oddly enough she didn't feel like she changed into a dragon, she felt drained... as if she lost something important to her. But just to make sure she had to ask Spike.

"Spike, did it work? Am I a dragon?"

But Spike shook his head.

"Uh, Twilight? You might want to look in your mirror."

Confused as to what happened Twilight quietly walked over to her bedroom mirror. She began to study her reflection as if it were fascinating. As she studied her reflection she noticed something of vital importance was missing: her horn. She kept on studying her reflection over and over hoping that this was all an illusion.

This is impossible! she said to herself. How could I have possibly lost my horn? This has got to be some sort of mistake! But no matter how many times she looked at her reflection her horn wasn't reappearing. Twilight had really done it to herself this time.

"Twilight," Spike said. "Don't freak out over this, I'm pretty sure your horn will come back."

"But what if it doesn't come back? What if this is a permanent?"

"Aw, come on, Twilight. It won't be permanent. None of your spells have ever lasted forever. So stop worrying so much, alright?"

As usual Spike was right. It was something that she didn't have to worry about. Her horn would come back at some point. It would just be a matter of time before she relocates it. It must have just came off her head when she was doing the spell. That had to be it. It couldn't have just disappeared.

Thinking about it a little more Twilight thought it could have been possible that her could have latched itself onto another pony.

Perhaps I should investigate Ponyville for any sudden changes...

With her decision in mind, Twilight left the Golden Oaks library and trotted around Ponyville quietly studying to see if any ponies looked different or odd to her. The first dozen of ponies she noticed didn't posses a new attribute. Most of the ponies she passed by seemed the same. But regardless of that she kept on looking. There had to be at least one thing different about somepony, but even though she kept on looking she found nothing out of the ordinary.

Twilight sighed and kept on walking, as she approached the edge of Ponyville she noticed her friends chattering away about something. Curious, she took a closer look and to her surprise something was different.

"I simply cannot believe this," Rarity said. "Pinkie Pie when in the world did you become a unicorn?"

"Wait, wait, wait," Twilight said hastily. "What did you say, Rarity?"

All her friends stared at her. They seemed to have noticed Twilight's new appearance.

"Twilight! Your horn!" Rainbow Dash said, she was surprised to see Twilight the way she was now. It was shocking to see her as an earth pony.

"M-M-my goodness, Twilight...what happened?" Fluttershy said chiming in.

"What in tar-nation sugar cube?" AppleJack said, chiming in as well.

Twilight hesitated for a moment. She had no idea what to say back. But she knew if she didn't answer her friends would worry more. Out of haste she said:

"I have no idea how this happened. More importantly, Pinkie Pie, when did you become a unicorn?" She focused her attention on Pinkie Pie and noticed her newfound horn. Something felt odd about the this, but Twilight couldn't make it out. Perhaps it was because she had no idea how her spell transferred her horn over to Pinkie Pie. It must have been an accident. There had to be a counter spell. There just had to be. There had to be a way to fix this. Twilight told herself that at least a dozen times trying not to believe what splendor she was beholding in front of her eyes.

Pinkie Pie perked up and began to energetically bouncing around making "wheee" sounds. The situation had not affected her at all.

"Oh, don't be silly, Twilight! I only became a unicorn five minutes ago when a magical light surrounded me and...BAM! I became a unicorn! Isn't this exciting? I've never been so excited! Are you as excited as I am Twilight? Huh? Huh? Huh?"

Twilight slapped her face with her hoof. Pinkie Pie was making absolutely no sense with the exception of the unicorn part. But regardless Twilight had to break the news to Pinkie Pie.

"This is serious, Pinkie!" She said stomping her hoof on the ground. "You're not supposed to be a unicorn and this wasn't supposed to happen!" She began to pace around in a circle, thinking of ways to reverse the spell.

"But Twilight...is it really so important to get your horn back? Wouldn't you rather be an earth pony for a little while? It could be fun!" Pinkie Pie insisted. She showed hints of wanting to keep her new unicorn horn.

"No, Pinkie! I need to fix this! If I'm an earth pony I will no longer be Princess Celestia's student and I can't let that happen! I need you to come with me to the library so I can figure out a way you can reverse this spell."

Rarity chimed in: "But, Twilight, darling, there's no way to reverse a kind changing spell..."

Hearing this made Twilight go into instant shock. Hearing that wasn't good for her to hear. More importantly what was she going to do now? Knowing what to do began to bewilder Twilight.

No way to reverse the spell? I'm going to be an earth pony permanently? The very thought shocked her further.

Twilight had no idea what to believe anymore. It was impossible for her to find a way around what was going on. She didn't know what could possibly happen next, but whatever it was she knew it couldn't be a good thing.

To be continued...

Author's Note

Uh, when I wrote this I had questions in my head as to what would happen if Twilight didn't battle Discord and instead she came up with a crazy spell that forces her to become an Earth Pony? And viola! Friendship is Useless was born! Not much to say other then the fact that I chose Pinkie Pie first for this. This is actually going to be a series of fics under the same name. Next I plan to do Princess Celestia and AppleJack that one will be chaotic...