“Mommy!” The little filly called, “Can I hear a story before bed?” Her eyes were that of a cat, large and so adorable that none could resist their demands.
Her mother turned towards her, just after tucking her in, ready to spoil the tucking with some late night history. “Well,” her nasally voice started, “What would you like to hear, Neon?”
“Anything, Mommy, I wanna hear about you!” The mare laughed, enthused by her daughters answer.
“How about the story of the fastest mare in Equestria, and her flight from the police?”
Neon jumped out of her bed with joy, “Yes, yes!” she demanded.
“It all began twenty-two years ago, back when there was some sort of Alicorn problem or something, my history is fuzzy, but that’s another story.”
She was soaring through the skies, the clouds could not disturb her practice, for she was Rainbow Dash, the fastest and most athletic mare in Equestria. Nopony could dare face this pony in a race and win fairly, although she was always the last in line to cider from the local farm. The day was ordinary, clouds spreading throughout the sky, just as they were planned to be by the weather patrols.
But there was a new patrol in Ponyville, one that would not tolerate her excessive speeding.
Red and Blue flashed behind her head, confusing Rainbow Dash as to why she was being chased by a silly looking pony with a siren on his head.
“Pull over!” he screamed at the mare. “Pull over, I said!”
Rainbow Dash slowed down, just enough to turn herself towards the pony in a blue uniform and a flashing hat. “Uhh...” she was unsure what to say, what pony wouldn’t be? He was panting, taking a long time to catch up to Rainbow Dash, revealing that he was really out of shape for pegasus, especially for a patrol pegasus too.
“Is there a problem, sir?” she asked, really confused of the situation. The night before she had been doing some hardcore cupcakes with Pinkie Pie, she wasn’t sure if this was affecting her reality or not at this point.
“You bet there’s a problem, you were going mach ten in a mach 2 zone! That’s a huge safety hazard, what in darn blazes were you thinking, girl?”
“Umm...”
“That’s right, you weren’t thinking! Innocent ponies could’ve been hurt thanks to your reckless flying. Why can’t you ponies think about others? Does it not occur to you that flying into heavy traffic will probably kill you?” She looked around, seeing nopony in sight but this strange patrol pegasus.
“So, what is this about? You’re not seriously out here for... this... Are you?”
“I don’t like the tone of your voice, missy.”
Nobody calls me Missy... Rainbow Dash thought, ready to insult back if she had to.
“Say, what’s your name, girl?” He finally asked.
“Rainbow Dash.” She mumbled.
“I’m sorry, what was that?” He took out a pen and little blue notebook, ready to write her down a ticket.
“Rainbow Dash!” She screamed.
“Well, I believe I’ve heard of you before, don’t you have yourself some sort of title around here?”
“Yeah, I’m the fastest pony in Equestria.” She was ready to just fly off, already sure that she could break free of this stallions annoyance, but she had nothing to do today, so she tolerated it a bit more.
"Fastest pony in Equestria, eh? Well these are my skies, Miss Dash!" He wrote down something on his pad, handing the ticket to the incompetent mare.
She looked at the paper he had handed to her, it read 5000 bits. “What is this?” she asked, still unsure this was a real thing.
“It’s a ticket, you can pay it at Cloudsdale, or we take it from you after a certain period of time.”
“Yeah... Whatever...” She dropped the ticket, turning back to her usual route, readying herself to take off.
“Hey! You can’t drop that, it’s against the law!”
“What law?” Her face was that of Derpy, unable to comprehend what the hay was going on still.
“The flying laws!”
“...”
She took off, trying to get away from that nutjob as fast as she could. He turned on his siren immediately, flying as fast as his slow body could after her.
“Stop!” He screamed, he was almost a mile away in mere seconds. He grabbed his radio, voicing his words for backup.
Hours passed, and Rainbow Dash had seemingly just disappeared. She was still flying, practicing her runs around the city of Cloudsdale, busting clouds and taking names.
It wasn’t long after she had fallen asleep on a moistened cloud that a blue chariot pulled up, two very large stallions pulling it, the passengers were the same police pony from before, and another who wore a bright badge that said “chief.”
“Hey, wake up!” screamed the officer.
Rainbow Dash woke in confusion, “He-Wha?” She yawned.
“You’re under arrest, you have the right to an attorney, anything you say or do will be held against you in a biased court of law.” They continued for several more sentences before Rainbow Dash once again took off, but these chariots were faster than the average pony, they were powered by rainbows.
“She’s resisting!” the chief yelled, “After her!” The officer picked up his radio again, asking for reinforcements. They arrived within seconds, seeing as how they were right next to Cloudsdale. She quickly found herself being chased by at least 5 rainbow-powered chariots. They were closing in on her, cause ya know, rainbows.
Rainbow Dash dashed into a cloud, sending cloud fragments in the way of two chariots, they crashed and fell to the ground in a tremendous scene.
“That’s another charge for destruction of property!” The chief yelled. She went through another cloud, and a few more went down. The ponies landed on the ground, dead, flattened by their chariots. It came down to just the Chief’s chariot, and Rainbow’s flank.
“What the hay is wrong with you ponies?” She asked, screaming it down the speed of her feathers, coming out as muffled noises.
She turned around, readied for her final stand. She charged at them, colliding into the pegasi. The clash of wood and flesh became abundant in such little time, they fell down to the earth, most died on impact, all but Rainbow Dash, and the officer.
“Ugh!” they both moaned in pain.
“And then what?” Neon asked her mother.
“Oh, nothing special.” Her mom walked out of the room, putting her hoof on the door. “And sweety, that’s how I met your father.”
