Fallout Equestria Raiders

Fallout Equestria Raiders

Chapter One - Expect the worst

“When life gives you lemons, rip them in half and shove them into life’s eyes! Because fuck lemons, its all about apples!”

        When do you know its time to stop? When do you know its time to change? When do you know you have reached the last leg of your life. Well... I for one can tell you that this exact moment is that time.

        BANG!

        And as soon as I kill these fucks that I use to call my friends I can have my revelation in-

        BANG!

        Fuck this, I can’t even finish a fucken thought. I leaped out of cover, and barreled down the long hallway. A black mare with an assault rifle stood before me. Her name was Railgun. She had a fetish for impalement, but when it came to close range fighting... she sucked. And so did her aim. Every shot other missed or bounced off of my armor. I was after all the only one that made the armor that we all used, but I made mine better!

        I leaped forward and wrapped my forehooves around her head. Then with a mighty twist, her head whipped about. Her head was now sported a 240* angle. I smiled. It was a better look than before. She was a very ugly mare.

        “Crimson you fucker where the hell did you ass go?!” The voice of Sweet Tongue called out. He was a larger earth pony. White with a messy green mane. He always love knocking ponies around with me. But now he too was going to die.

He and his brother told everypony to kill me. And no one wants that now. Well I don’t.  But considering the fact that I have twenty-five years of “Raiding” under my belt and they have... less than ten? Ah whatever, didn’t have the best of memories after a grenade almost killed me a while back. Anyways, on top of that my kill count is higher, and out of all of us I'm the only fucker that learned how to read. Oh And if your little mind has not figured it out by now, I'm a Raider. But I’m considering on stopping. Back to the killing.

“Oh ya, you're going to enjoy this Crimson,” Reaction took over and I shot out a hind hoof. It impacted the thought of Sweet Tongue's brother. His name was Drive Pie. I would always call him Shit pie, and now that I think of it that i probably why he want to kill me. He was a unicorn and was wielding a large ax. He was never good with melee weapons. He was also gagging on the floor. AND he was also the fucker that told everyone to kill me. Oh and let’s not forget the fact that I collapsed this throat.

“Oh look it Shit Pie,” He gave a twitch as he struggled for breath. “Well then you look in pain. Well I'm no doctor, but I do know a large amount of lead to the face is a great painkiller!” Using my magic I grabbed the nearby assault rifle in my blue magic field, and unloaded into Shit’s head. Funny, playing doctor was always fun. At least his death was quick and painless. Not that he deserved it, but still killing his was very satisfying.

It was then something large and shaped like Sweet Tongue landed on me. Oh wait... it was Sweet Tongue, and he was wearing my horseshoes. I was wondering where those were. Sadly ‘were’ they were was shoved into my back pinning me down. Why did he have to be such a fat ass? If it were some other pony I could have just knocked him off... Oh wait. I have magic.

“Smell that?” He shoved my muzzle down into his brothers pooling blood. “Does it smell good? Because your going to join the smell soon, but not after I'm done carving you up for what you-”

BANG-BANG-BANG!

Like I had said. I had magic, and an assault rifle. And now I also had my good old horseshoe! Man was today looking up. There was only one more of my old pals left to kill, and then I can start a new! Then I could explain why I'm changing! Why I want to change things and turn them around. Because-

KaBANG-

A sniper round entered my leg... In short I was pissed. Again, my thoughts were cut off, but more or less I was in pain. Holy shit, that fucken hert. I then dove behind Sweet Tongues body. For once the big fucker was doing good. Even if he was just being a meat shield.

Even if I most of my leg was... blown to bits, it was just pain that preceded me. Pain was pain. I was a raider. We go hoof and hoof, so I did my best to ignore it. I didn’t have any positions on me so I would just have to deal with it. I did however had some painkillers. And no, I was not going to shoot myself. That was Shit Pie’s thing, not me... mine was buffout. No, i'm not an addict. Yep... buffout is amazing when you can see your own bone.

Ever notice how blood loss makes you do idiotic things? I started my way down the hallway, keeping low to the ground so that the sniper could not see me through the broken windows. Then I pulled myself around the corner and started to tumble down a flight of stairs. I know I said ignoring the pain was what I was going to do, but when you roll down some stairs when the bone is exposed... that shit is PAINFUL!

Luckily the sniper, or Rage Cup if you want to call him by his name, didn’t know I stumbled down the stairs. Also a good stroke of luck was his irate stubbornness about tunnel vision. Hobbling up to my hooves, I pulled out my assault rifle and aimed at his head. I may not have been the best with guns but I knew how to aim. He was on the roof. I was at ground level. At this range I would miss, but I was old and had many tricks hidden under my hoof. I concentrated. He didn’t notice the rifle floating up to his head. I pulled the trigger, and two bullets entered his head.

I sighed. They are all dead now, and that means I can tell you why. Well... I found a statuette. A statuette of a butter yellow are with a pink mane. She has several small animals around her, but when I hold her in my magic I can feel all the pain that I have done. Acknowledge everything that I did, and make me want to do better. There was even a engraving on the side. It says ‘Be Pleasant.’ And well... it make me feel bad for what i did.

*** *** ***

I watched in enjoyment as the blown apart skin around my hoof healed. I had made my way over to the where we stored most of our loot. To my enjoyment we had plenty respiration positions. Man were they great! And now came the part that I was expecting. Changing from my raider armor to something that won't get me shot on sight. I used my magic to browse the large selection of clothes that we had. All of which were in bad condition. A bloodstained suit? No, no protection. It was in good condition though... A set of combat armor? Nope, the damn thing was falling apart. A grenade? How the hell did that get in the there? It then dawned on me that I might have to make a new set of armor. Well fuck. I had only ever made armor that looked... evil. And now I was going to have to make something look nice... Well if I was going to do as this statuette wanted, Be Pleasant, then I was going to have to do it. But what?

Well let me step back and look at what I got. The suit is in great shape, but is just covered in blood. The combat armor is falling apart, but the metal plates must still be intact. I even had a couple of rages and trader barding to use. There was even a baseball cap. I... had nothing. Well... I could cut apart the armor and add the plates over the suit. Ya... that might work. I can even take apart the helmet and use it to fix the ball cap. Or... Man, I was not a smart pony. Well I strong and perceptive, and pain was a good pal of mine. But when it came to the thinking part, I sucked. And I don’t think my history being a raider was going to help making friends. Speaking of friends, I'm off to a great start, don't you think? I mean, I had just killed them. I'm still covered in their blood. Doesn't really help that we lived in a school. Were kids go to make friends.

Ok, other than non-raider armor, what do normal ponies have? I know they were bags, and have lots of ammo. I glanced over to the opposite wall. Yep, ammo. Lots of ammo from the many days-O-plundering. And a good weapon... I glanced over at the assault rifle. It looked like shit. It worked pretty damn well, but it looked like shit. Maybe I should clean it...

Then there was caps. Bottle caps to be exact. I don’t know the exact amount of caps we Raiders have collected over the years, but I knew it was in the hundreds. Well that takes care of money...

Armor, ammo, guns, and caps... what can be next? Healing shit, I mean... Restoration potions! I looked down at the empty bottles of potion. I had used most to fix my leg, and had one left. Well... fuck. It was a good thing that I still had the bottle of Buffout. Its not like I took all the pills at once. It was made for several uses, not just one. And... I think that is all I need. Well time to get to work.

To help pass the time I used my magic to flip on the radio. It alway sucked working in complete silence. Then the music started. From how often I listened, I knew the song was going to end. “How can I fix this?  How many times must I try?  Please, this time, let me get it right!” The voice was of Sweetie Belle. And the song reminded me of what I was starting to do, and I had just done. I smiled.

And then the a voice broke out from the speaker. The voice of DJ Pon-3. “This is DJ Pon3, and that was Sweetie Belle, singing about that one great truth of the wasteland: every pony has done something they regret.  And now, my little ponies, it’s time for the news!  Now you ponies remember when I told you ‘bout those two ponies who crawled themselves out of Stable Two?  Well, I’ve been gettin’ reports that one of those little ponies took out the raider nest in the heart of Ponyville, and saved several pony captives -- including the beloved author of The Wasteland Survival Guide, Ditzy Doo!  Hey kid, thanks!  From all of us!  And now the weather: cloudy everywhere, with a chance of rain, gunfire and bloody dismemberment...”

…Wait, what? Then some music started to play through the speaker. Hold on, rewind that. Hid he say that a Stable Dweller killed a group of Raiders? How the hell is that possible?! Stable Dwellers suck! I know, I know, I should be more considerate considering I just killed a group myself, but come on! I have been in the wasteland for my entire life, and a Stable Dweller has been in a hole for theirs. I almost died, and it sounds like the Stable Dweller kicked ass! What... I'm overthinking it. Just let it go. Ponyville is on the other side of Equestria. There is no way that you would ever meet her. Besides, we are both doing the right thing... Be Pleasant.

*** *** ***

        Six... of the longest hours of my life later, I found myself think that I was getting myself a little too hyped. Why? Well it started to rain. In Equestria when it rains, it takes days for it to stop. Luckily the suit I made was thick. And all the stitches and fabric I used were made of Caravan barding. In the end my new armor did look like a suit. It looked like some businesspony was going to war, and the battlefield was his office. Luckily it was mostly black. My favorite color, and the color of my mane. Thou if I got blood on me my red fur would make it hard to see. In short, the hat I made was not water proof, the armor I made was partly water froop, and outside was nothing but water.

        I shoved what ammo I could into my pocket, and grabbed some extra guns. Then I shoved them into the bag I through together... Ok fine. I didn’t make the bag. I just added them to my barding. They were made of some medical containers spray painted to also be black... Well, when I say spray painted, I mean I threw them into a fire so that they turn black.

        KABOOM!

        The sound of thunder rocked the school around me. And my ears had twitched. That was not a good thing. The lightning sounded louder than what it was supposed to be, and much closer. As if it hit the school... Ah Fuck! The school was on fire.

        As fast as I could manage, everything was equipped. Man, it felt strange wearing the armor, but I couldn't think of somthing like that. The fire was spreading quickly. I barreled out of the storage room door and tore down the hall. I could have just jumped through one of the windows, but that would mean jumping through the fire. It sounded fun, but falling from the 2nd floor... not a good thing. It happened to me before.

        Part of the ceiling caved in, blocking my path. I now had two options. Move through the classrooms or jump out the window... I know its not the best option, but I didn’t want to run through the classrooms. Window time.

        KRASH!

        Why did I pick the one window that still had glass...? I’m not a smart pony. Then I landed on the ground and started to roll. You know, it didn’t really hurt that bad. Then I started to run from the fire. I started to run towards the nearest town.

END OF CHAPTER