An unlikely tale

We last left our hero, Ralph, staring at his changed reflection in a lake. Already in progress.

"Oh dear.....I'm a pony. Plain and simple. a Unicorn. Joy."  He looks at himself closer. "Lets see....Forest-green body. My seems unchanged, so yellow or blond mane, plus tail..." He looks at his flank and waggles it, making his tail bounce. In doing so, he notices an important detail.

".....No Cutie Mark. Thats a problem. An almost-adult blank flank? No...." He paces uncertainly. Then, inspiration strikes.

"Its obvious. Just think of what I'm good at," His  face screws up in concentration. After a minute or two, a mark appears. "Oooh, tingly!" The mark is an open book, crossed by a pen and pencil. He cranes around to look at it. "Hmmm.... interesting. Not what I would've expected."

He finally takes his drink.

Then he paces.

"Hmmmm.....I would bet that this is the Everfree Forest. Always loved the name. I have no doubts that Ponyville is near. I also have no doubts that I wouldn't be turned away.  His stomach lightly gurgles. "Oof. I'm hungry." He glances around in the vague hope that a three-course dinner would materialize. Unsurprisingly, one fails to appear. He paces some more.

"I need an alibi. And a name. Ralph Orlando would evoke too much interest. Hmmmm...." He continues pacing thoughtfully."I need a pony name,"  he states, just in case he forgot, apparently. He continues pacing, for a while, his stomach complaining at regular intervals, spouting names and shooting them down."Bookworm? No, makes me seem like a nerd.... Good Book? No, just.....no." It goes on as such.

Soon, night falls. "Oh grand. Night in the Everfree. Now a Manticore or Timberwolf can eat my face while I sleep." He begins gathering branches and twigs for a fire. Soon, "Okay. I got all I need for a fire, plus extra. Now how do I start it?" He stares at the pile of wood. A light shines above his eyes, but he dismisses it for his stare The stare changes to a glare as he wills it to catch fire of it's own accord. To his surprise, it does. The pile bursts into flame suddenly, causing Ralph to rear back in surprise.

"Oh yeah....," he realizes, "Unicorn magic." He droops in exhaustion. "Wow, that was.....tiring." He lays down, and tries to fall asleep. After roughly a half-hour, his consciousness fades and he drifts off.

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Ralph wakes the next morning to a loud stomach. Ralph looks around, vaguely surprised that he was still alive. "Well now. What to have for breakfast?"  He looks around, as if expecting food to just coalesce into existence. "Now this IS a fine kettle of fish....." He suddenly yells out, "Oh! I know!" Excitement is plain on his face. "Awesome Read! Perfect name for me. Just the right mix of smarts and awesome." Ralph, or Awesome Read, lets loose a satisfied smirk. Then, his stomach roars loudly, wiping it from his face.

He looks at the woods. "Maybe I can find berries.....?" On that note, he walks to the roof of the trees in search of food. Finding none, he resolves to go into the woods for food. "Here we go...." He plunges into the woods, searching for for in the dark cool underneath it's leafy canopy. His inspection of bushes turns up nothing, but he remains hopeful. "Come on, Raspberries!"

Then, a loud roar echoes through the woods. Without a word, he pivots 80 degrees and trots in a different direction.

His hoofsteps are noticeably softer. He mutters, "Don't want to know."

Slowly, the woods thin out, and become brighter. "I'm getting out of these godforsaken woods now...." Ahead, he sees a bright white picket fence and apple trees as far as he can see.