Patchwork Pony

by DubleTruble96

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Main 6, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 3076

The life of Patchwork, the pony who has some weird abilities and an even stranger backstory!

After a freak accident at a local toyshop on Earth, a strange new pony arrives in the small town of Ponyville...She shouldn't even be alive! She should be sitting on a shelf with the rest of her kind. But this strange mare isn't going to let that stop her! She'll just have to avoid stepping in puddles...

A funny idea I had regarding life-sized stuffed pony toys. Also, a new OC! Is she the first of her kind? Maybe. Probably not.

Published 2013-07-21 06:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-14 22:49:33 UTC

Toy Story

A strange pony woke up in a place she didn't recognize....She was in a grassy clearing, a single path lay ahead of her. She stood up on all fours and looked around. This was new to her....She was never outside before...And normally, she wasn't able to move at all! Like she was a toy or something....She pressed her hoof down and felt her weight press down on it. Weird. She decided to start down the path. The wind blew through her mane and she looked around, her lifeless eyes darting left and right as she looked at her surroundings.

Finally, she saw something. She stared at the strange place. There were creatures here. They looked like her! Maybe they knew what was going on! She galloped over, her hooves not making so much as a clop on the ground.

"Hey! You!"

Lyra turned to the pony who was talking to her. She saw something bizarre. Running toward her was a pony....well...what LOOKED like a pony. But it's fur was kind of.....fleecy looking.....She had strange stitch like patterns running up and down her body and legs. She also seemed to have faux hair as her mane...She stopped and stared for a while with a quizzical expression.

"Do you know where I am?" She said, stopping in front of her.
"Um....Yeah." She said, snapping out of her trance. "Yeah...You're in Ponyville. You new here?"
"You could say that, yes!" She said, smiling.

Lyra smiled awkwardly at her.

"Well....um.....I'm sorry if I'm being rude, but....why do you look so....um....weird?"
"What do you mean?" The pony frowned.
"Well....hold on...I need to take you to Twilight....She'll know." Lyra started walking to the library.
"Wait! Lemme go with you!" She ran to catch up with her.
"That's the plan." Lyra said, rolling her eyes.

They arrived at the library shortly after, and Twilight answered the knocking noise.

"Hello Lyra. What's up?" She said cheerily.
"Um, hey Twi....Can you explain this any better than I can?" Lyra stepped aside and let Twilight see the strange pony.
Twilight might as well have looked at a puzzle that had only one missing piece that she couldn't find.

The pony waved shyly.
"H-Hello."
"Um....I think it's a pony....wearing a costume..."
Lyra nodded, then looked at the pony again.
"Wait....no...it doesn't have a zipper..."
"Maybe it's one of those weird one piece costumes...." Twilight said, then she used her magic to pull on the pony's fur.

The pony just stood there, seemingly unfazed about the fact that her fur was being pulled at with the force of 3 stallions.

"Well whatever it is, it's not coming apart!" She said with a strained grunt.

The pony smiled at Twilight. Twilight stared back.

"Open your mouth for a second."

Lyra gave her a look. "What? Why?!"
"Not you!"
"Oh."

The pony opened her mouth as wide as she could. What Twilight saw baffled her. The pony seemed to have rubber teeth, with a tounge made of silk and a throat that looked like it was padded all the way down. Twilight closed the pony's mouth and twitched. Finally, she said to the strange mare,

"You're not from here, are you?"
"Nope. I just woke up in a clearing and then came here."
"Do you remember anything before that?"
"No, not really..."
"What's your name?"
"I don't have one."

Twilight tapped her chin thoughtfully. Finally, she reached the conclusion that the pony was a sentinent, animate, living, breathing stuffed animal of a pony. She really didn't know how or why she was here in Equestria or how she came to be alive, but she was alive and needed a name...

Her eyes lit up and she smiled.

"Welcome to Ponyville, Patchwork!"

The Following Day...

Patchwork walked downstairs and smiled at Twilight. Twilight had been gratious enough to allow her to stay for the time being. Though, the reason Twilight had in mine wasn't just out of the generousity of her heart. More of the curiousity of her mind. Patchwork was a stuffed animal pony. And yet, she could walk, talk, breathe, play and all sorts of other things that everypony else could do. Well...besides magic or flying. She WAS just an earth pony. If you want to call her that.

"Sleep well, Patchy?"

"Oh, it was heavenly, Twilight! Thank you so much for letting me stay here!"

"It's no trouble at all....but...could you possibly allow me to study you and your anatomy? As repayment for your lodgings?"

"Hm?"

Twilight grinned sheepishly, then explained.

"Well, I'm a student to Princess Celestia. And I'm sure she would love to hear about your anatomy and how it is you're even alive. It won't be much, really. Just some physical testing, maybe a bit of internal scoping and maybe some minor surgery."

Patchwork stared at her with a horrified expression, which suddenly sprung back into a joyful smile.

"Oh of course Twilight! I'd love to!"

Twilight's nervous smile quickly turned into a puzzled (and a little bit startled) frown.

"What, really?!"

"Yes! I'm just as curious as you are. I mean, I love that I'm actually a living creature now, but I know absolutely nothing about myself past that."

Twilight blinked, then smiled a little.

"Well...great! I'll go get some paper and a quill!"

Patchwork was layed out on a medical stretcher and had been covered with a surgical tarp. Twilight came down with a surgical mask and rubber hoof covers, as well as a medical outfit and a hairnet. Spike came down with a large steel tray covered with surgical tools, with some other....non-medical tools that were picked for this unique specimen.

Spike, on the other hand, was questioning this would-be surgeon.

"Twilight, are you sure this is legal? You're uneducated, unlicenced and not to mention, not a surgeon. You're even doing this in your home basement on a patient that is still awake. How you got your hooves on these medical tools, I'll never know."

"Shush Spike. Sometimes you have to break a few rules to advance knowledge."

"This is more than a few rules. This is a few felonies and not to mention, sentancable by banishment or de-"

"I said shush! Just stand there and hand me tools when I need you to."

She turned to Patchwork.

"You ready, Patchy?"

Patchwork just smiled brightly and nodded.

"All set, Twilight!"

Twilight nodded, then lifted the sheet, revealing Patchwork's underbelly.

"Scalpel."

Twilight emerged from her basement, her lust for knowledge only partially satisfied. She found out some, but had to know more. But first, a lunch break.

She asked Spike to make some daisy sandwiches, with the promise of giving him a few bits to buy himself a gem later. Spike gave her a salute and ran into the kitchen while Twilight and Patchwork sat at the table. Soon, Spike emerged from the kitchen and set out a plate with sandwiches on it. Twilight smiled and took one, while Patchwork just stared at the sandwiches with a puzzled look.

Twilight looked at her and blinked. "Oh I'm sorry, Patchy...are you allergic to daisies?"

"No no....um...but do you have any clothes, rags, or fabric scraps that you're not using anymore? I'm feeling peckish."

"Wha?"

"I'm a plush pony, Twi. I can't digest the same foods you can. Only fabric will do."

It took a minute, but it finally dawned on Twilight. Obviously she can't digest plant matter and starch....she was a stuffed animal! But she COULD digest cotton, fleece and other fabrics...She smiled and told her to stay put.

Twilight ran to Rarity as fast as possible and stopped in front of her.

"Rarity! I need an entire bolt of fabric, stat!"

"Whatever for, darling?" Rarity asked, as she used her magic to pull out a bolt of blue silk fabric.

"You're going to think I'm crazy....but I need it to feed a stuffed animal."

Rarity stopped everything and looked at her with a quizzical look.

"I'm sorry, my hearing has been off lately. Did you say "to feed a stuffed animal"?"

"Yes, I know...Let me explain the entire story."

"So now do you understand?"

"Twilight are you sure you didn't hit your head, darling?"

"I know it sounds crazy, but if you don't believe me, just come to see for yourself."

Rarity shrugged, then took Twilight's bits, gave her the bolt of fabric, and followed her out of her boutique.

They arrived and needless to say, Rarity couldn't even believe her own eyes. But there it was. A walking, talking stuffed pony. Twilight walked over and set down the bolt of fabric and unraveled some of it, cutting off a rather large square of it and offering it to Patchwork.

Patchwork smiled and stuffed it into her mouth hungrily, swallowing it whole. Twilight, Spike and Rarity all stared at her questioningly.

"Did you even CHEW that?!"

Patchwork shook her head.

"I can't even if I wanted to. Rubber teeth, remember?"

Rarity looked at Twilight, who just smiled sheepishly and shrugged. Meanwhile, Patchwork snipped off another chunk of fabric and swallowed it too.

This is going to be interesting....

Author's Note

Oh my god what I have I done? Well, this seems like it'll be an interesting idea, plush ponies...Hmmm....

Sew Anyway...

Twilight sent word to her friends to make sure they weren't startled by their strange new visitor. She also sent word to the Princesses about Patchwork and her findings. She recieved this note in reply:

My Faithful Student,
I am very curious about this new pony (although, I can't necessarily say I approve of how you went about getting your information.). I've heard of things like this happening before, though. Send me whatever information you can about her. Perhaps we could use her strange abilities...

Sincerely, Princess Celestia

Twilight, now armed with the orders from her Princess, grabbed her notepad and quill and set out with Patchwork (or Patches, for short.) on a "walk around Ponyville".

Patches and Twi went about their business, going throughout town. Although most were warned about their new guest, many still stared with bewilderment and curiousity. No one knew how to react to a giant stuffed animal walking around like Patches. Patches however didn't seem to notice all the staring or comments. Or perhaps, she didn't care. They soon arrived at Applejack's cart.

"Hey Applejack!"
"Hey Twilight! Is this Patches?" Applejack asked, nodding toward her stuffed companion (though she already knew the answer).
"Yep, that's her alright..." She said with a giggle. "We're here for a few apples."

Applejack gave Twilight a bag of apples and took her bits. But then Patches chimed in.

"It's okay Twi! I got it!~" Patches said with a smile.

Twilight was right in the middle of putting the apples into her saddlebag when she said that. Twilight smiled a bit.

"What? The apples?"
"Yeah!"
"You don't even have saddlebags...."
"I don't need saddlebags, silly!"

Twilight shrugged and offered the bag to Patches for her to take. Much to Twilight's surprise, Patches, rather than taking the bag with her mouth like she thought she would, took the entire thing into her mouth and swallowed it whole! Applejack rubbed her eyes to make sure she saw that right.

"Did you just swallow 6 apples in a bag whole?!" She exclaimed.
"Uh-huh." Patches didn't seem fazed at all. "Why?"
"Are they still intact?" Twilight asked.
"Of course they are!" Patches said with a smile. And then, as if she's been doing it her entire life, she spat up the bag of apples and caught it with her mouth right before it slipped out and hit the ground.

Applejack couldn't stop staring with her mouth agape. Twilight on the other hand was too busy taking notes on Patches' strange ability. Patches then swung her head back and swallowed the bag once more. (A/N: For the readers, I'll keep track of Twilight's notes as we go along!)

Twilight's Notes:

-Specimen can swallow large objects whole. Size limit not yet known.
-Specimen can also regurgitate any swallowed objects.
-Organic material swallowed by specimen undamaged. (Specimen has no digestive acids or any other fluids in her body. She seems to be completely like a stuffed animal.)
-Possibility that specimen can be used to store and transport goods?

Twilight and Patches said goodbye to Applejack, who was still a little unnerved about the whole thing, and continued on their way. They soon came across Fluttershy, who looked nervous around Patches. Patches however seemed perfectly comfortable. They interacted for a little while before a passing cart splashed the trio with mud from a puddle nearby. The stallion pulling the cart didn't have any time to apologize, as he was in a hurry.

Twilight and Fluttershy groaned a bit and started to scrape the mud out of their manes and fur. But Patches just shook her body (much like a dog would) and all the mud came off. Not a single stain or mud splat was present on her! The two of them stared at her for a minute, and Twilight wrote this down:

Twilight's Notes:

-Specimen's 'fur' (fabric?) and mane cannot be stained.
-Specimen also seems to be easily cleaned, even from the stickiest of messes.

Fluttershy then had the idea of going to the spa to clean up. So the 3 of them went out to the spa for a bath. Well...Twi and Flutters did. Patches kind of just stood in the lobby...She seemed nervous about the water. Twilight made sure to take note of that before taking her bath.

Twilight's Notes:

-Specimen doesn't like water

Well, after cleaning up, Twilight bid farewell to Fluttershy and the trio became a duo once more. They continued walking around for about an hour. Soon, Rainbow Dash spotted the pair while she was resting on a cloud.. She snickered, planning on doing a fly-by to startle her friends. So she got into position, then took off from her cloud toward the ground-bound friends. She flew over them from a distance first, then turned tail and zoomed down toward them from the front.

Twilight dove out of the way upon seeing Rainbow zipping toward them, but Patches didn't care. She stood there and went to say hi, but ended up with a mouthful, followed closely by a throatful, then a bellyful of Pegasus....Patches didn't even know how to respond to that. She just looked at her underside and saw Rainbow making quite a racket in there. She drew her head back and then spat out the Pegasus onto the ground.

"Sorry, Dashie! I didn't mean to!"
"YOU JUST ATE ME!!"

Patches just shrugged meekly and smiled. Twilight simply stared for 2 seconds, then scribbled down more notes. Rainbow on the other hand couldn't get over the fact that she was just ingested, then regurgitated by a stuffed animal. Twilight then quickly approached.

"Rainbow! Do you think you could quickly tell me what you saw in there?" She asked.
"Well.....All I remember was flying toward you two, then suddenly everything turned into a tight pink tunnel followed by a weird pouch. It was really dark in there, but it was soft all around. That's when I realised that she had eaten me!"

Twilight scribbled down everything before asking, "Well did you see anything at all? Fluids, food, anything?"
"No...Just pink fluffy darkness."
"Alright...Sorry about the questions...Princess wanted me to take notes on our friend here."
"Sorry again Dashie..." Patches said with a giggle, seemingly totally comfortable about everything.
"I-It's fine...just don't do that again?....Please?"
"No promises." Patches said with a giggle.

Twilight's Notes:

-Specimen has ingested a full grown Pegasus (namely Rainbow Dash; by accident, I should mention)
-Rainbow emerged without physical harm
-Quoted with it being "Pink, fluffy darkness" inside of specimen's supposed digestive system
-No mention of anything else.
-Size limit for mouth and throat has been increased to the size of an adult mare or smaller

Finally, the day was done and the two of them returned to the library. Twilight had just ONE more thing to check out...

"Um Patches?"
"Yes, Twi?" She said with a smile completely devoid of pessimism.
"Would you be willing to swallow a camera snake and let it record what it's like inside your belly?"
"Well sure!" She said with a smile. "But wouldn't it be easier to just go down yourself?" She questioned.
"Uhhh......" Twilight didn't want to say 'yes' despite Patches being correct. "Nevermind. Let me just go get my camera snake."

Twilight left the room then returned with a regular camcorder.
"But I thought you were getting a camera snake. That doesn't look all that snake-like." Patches remarked with a giggle.

Twilight then proceeded to tie a string to it and giggled awkwardly.
"Ta-da? A home-made....camera......snake." Her ears flattened. "Nevermind. Just let me turn it on Record, and then we'll get started."

Patches sat on the floor with a long string coming out of her mouth. She had to keep her mouth open so that the string would go through easily. Meanwhile, the camera had a very very long patch cord connected to a screen that Twilight had set up. The purple unicorn watched the screen the entire time, making sure to write down every detail....:

Twilight's Notes:

-Specimen's digestive track is being recorded with a camera
-Footage shows that the specimen's throat 'tissue' is similar to that of a regular pony
-Stretchable fabric of an unknown make lines the entire esophagus
-The 'stomach' is made of a similar material
-Exit tunnel, presumably the entrance to specimen's mock intestinal tract is present near the back
-Audio from the footage shows signs of a 'heartbeat' despite the dissection showing that specimen doesn't have a visible heart

Finally, with her notes all written, re-written, spell-checked then re-written again, she had Spike send them off to Celestia. She sighed, and then heard Spike and Patches chatting. She didn't pay a whole lot of attention, but suddenly, the conversation ended and she heard something like Spike being dropped onto a pillow.....She turned and saw Patches with a sagging underside and a smile on her face.

"What.....were you two talking about?"
"Oh! Spike wanted to see what my tummy was like. So....I ate him!"

Twilight facehoofed. This was just getting weird.....

Little did she know that things were going to get a whole lot weirder....

Author's Note

Coming up next......Rarity makes stuffed toys. =)