Memoirs of a cursed mare
It had been a long day, exhausting. It has been years since I’ve started, and I still can’t get used to the amount of work. One would think being a princess would mean being pampered, right?
Wrong.
I approached the door to my room, said a quick greeting to the guards outside and closed the door. I sighed deeply and removed my garments.
Alas, the day had finished, my duties made. Now it was time to relax, and rest. I laid down on the soft pillow in the middle of my room and levitated a random tome off my bookcase. I perused its pages until I decided it was not worth my time.
I repeated the process several times, either disappointed by the content, or realizing I had
already read it recently. I eventually found an interesting piece, it seemed to be of recent history. I called for a servant and asked for a simple tea serving.
They brought over our entire collection of tea, all kinds, all sizes, from all over the land. I sighed and let them leave. I poured myself a cup of the cheapest tea we had and drank.
I sat there perusing the book, it was quite interesting to read the view of the author about history events. But it ultimately had disappointed me, most of the events portrayed their participants as nothing more than heroes, or martyrs. Clearly not giving the right idea.
I put the book away where it was before, as well as the tea cup.
I closed my eyes and rested my head between my hooves.
I laid there for a few minutes, trying to get sleep to give me its sweet embrace, it never came.
It was the same thing every day. Hard work, dealing with idiots, and then, when it was time to rest, I couldn’t do it. Memories kept me up, things long forgotten by everypony but me. It was sad, really. All I spent my free time on was reminiscing in the past, barely able to appreciate the present. And it felt so right.
I decided, it was time. It was time for all of this to end. It has been too much, for too long.
It was time.
I opened my eyes and slowly levitated a quill, an ink bottle and my journal. I carefully opened the dusty old journal, browsed over to the last page and slowly wrote ‘Immortality’ on the top of the page.
I put my quill to paper and wrote.
Hundreds of years have passed, families have been born and have died, empires have risen and fallen. Ponies come and go, but there are those that are never forgotten, that are remembered through history. For their actions, for their ideals, for their sole purpose of existing.
One such group of exceptional ponies are, of course, the elements of harmony. We all know the story, the fabled Element Bearers, exceptional mares that saved our way of life not once, not twice, but several times with the power of friendship.
They were exceptional ponies, friends and more. The books nowadays do not do them justice in any way or form. And I can only hope to make other understand what they missed.
It was thanks to them that my life took a turn for the better, that fateful day Princess Celestia sent me to Ponyville, when we defeated Nightmare Moon and freed Princess Luna. We discovered something truly greater than any other magic.
We discovered friendship.
From that point onward we shared adventures, moments and ultimately, our lives. We knew each other, we trusted each other. We loved each other. This lasted for a few years. I had stayed living in Ponyville under orders of the Princess to study the ‘magic of friendship’.
But then, I finished those studies. After a certain chain of events, I ascended into princesshood. Now known as Princess Twilight Sparkle, princess of Magic, or, friendship. As some would say.
I had never felt more accomplished in my life, my friends supported me in every way, my family more so. And I was thrilled by the responsibility bestowed upon me by my beloved mentor. Little did I know that things would change very quickly.
I do not blame her for doing this. I probably would’ve done the same, it is simply something one cannot answer easily. It involves concepts that a mortal would not understand. And so this is the purpose of this entry.
I lost my friends, one by one. I cannot describe the feeling one passes through when the ponies closest to you suffer, and you can’t do anything about it. What is immortality but a curse?
The things that mattered the most to me disappeared from my life. My family, my friends, curses, even the ponies I only knew as faces in the crowd were missed. And I had to keep going, I couldn’t do anything but mourn their passing, and patiently and grimly wait for the next tragedy.
When you are a being like me, the hard thing is not the responsibility, it is the weight you carry on your shoulders the rest of your miserable life.
I cannot get them back. I can only rejoice in the moments we shared together. Memories. Nothing but memories of a better time. Even if our lives weren’t perfect, we had each other, and I could not appreciate what I had at the time.
The world does not remember them how they were, the only place where they are done justice is in the ramblings of an old mare. The words of a being so old it forgets how is it able to cope with everything.
They all left.
First were my parents, the ponies that raised me, that supported me throughout my life, that were more proud than anypony else. I knew it would come, and they never stopped telling me that it was how life went on, that it was only natural. And for a moment, I believed them.
Then my brother left, the death of a prince, a tragedy for the whole Crystal Kingdom. A mournful lonely princess held the ceremony. My brother was one of the most influential ponies in my life, and I can only wish that he will be never be forgotten.
Some years passed before anything else really happened, but that was the problem, I didn’t see my friends anymore, I was busy, they were busy, each had their own life, their own family. But it was still hard to see them go.
I shall remember all of them like they were, for they deserve to be known as ponies that fought for friendship, not as martyrs that fought for our sake.
It would be useless to describe my friends now, my words can’t simply do them justice and the ideals they held dear are all slowly disappearing in this changing world of ours.
The princesses left us, not even leaving a reason, but that it was time for them to go. I didn’t understand the meaning until recently. They did not abandon us, they left because they cared for us, they needed to leave for us to be safe.
I still do not know where Spike is. I know he still is alive, but he never came back. I still hope one day he will return, but I’m also afraid he will. Ponies nowadays see dragons as heartless monsters bent on destruction. I can only wish he has found a good place to live the rest of his life.
I’m all alone now, the world needs to move on, I need to move on.
It is here I end it. Immortality is a curse, and our society has evolved so that it is not needed. May Celestia forgive me, I cannot continue this suffering, not when it is no longer necessary.
I, Princess Twilight Sparkle of Equestria, declare the monarchy to become obsolete, and the control of Equestria shall be handed down to the council.
I will end the legacy of the alicorns in this day, for it has only brought delay to the progress of our race, and our way of life.
It is the only way I can escape, the only way for you to be saf--
I dropped the quill from my magical hold and stared at the words I had written. I could not believe my eyes of what I had let out of my mind.
It was all true, but it seemed wrong. It was wrong.
I cast a quick spell on the page and incinerated all of my writings. I let it burn until it was all but dark ashes. Dark ashes hiding the fears and wishes of an old mare. Pathetic.
I had never understood those words, not clearly, until now. It is time.
It was time, and I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Pathetic.
I blinked away the tears building up in my eyes and rested my head between my hooves once again. I slowly ignored the world around me.
I closed my eyes and dreamed of the past.
Author's Note
Critique is heavily required.
I will not be expanding this, it is merely a stray thought I had bothering me while I was trying to write another piece. (Which will be coming soon. Shameless self-advertisement)
Thank you for reading! Leave a comment!
