Out of My Element: Corruption

Chapter 3 Opponents ready

"Returner, Returner," yelled Zune as he banged on the door that connected my room to the lab.

I sighed and tried to bury myself under the sheets that covered the bed. As I began to drift back asleep I made a mental note to fix the alarm clock in my room. Unfortunately for my prospects of sleep they did not block out the noise of the Diamond Dog. After several more attacks on the door I crawled out of bed, and blindly reached out for the light dimmer. The lights slowly increased in intensity as I fumbled with the switch and after putting on my glasses I staggered towards the door. Through the sleep blur still fresh on my eyes I could see myself in one of the mirrors. If it wasn't for the odd proportions and the mark on my rear I would look like a normal gray horse. Spurred on by another round of Zune's shouts I re-situated my glasses on my face and headed out into the lab proper. My only words to Zune were, "I thought I told you not to call me that."

Zune clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and replied, "But Returner is Returner."

"Zune, I've told you this before my name is Steel, I have no title." This had been a standard conversation over the past few months since I had returned from a possible future bringing Zune with me. In the small gap of time that I was gone my combat suit had disappeared, the lab had been destroyed, and the labs A.I. a neural copy of Jack had been off line. There were several possible causes for this but two stuck out, one the A.I. in the suit went rampant the other someone stole it. I know from the my jaunt to the future the suit’s A.I. will eventually go mad but I don’t know when or why it will turn unstable.

"Returner was given name and title after Returner left," he muttered.

"Alright Zune," I sighed this was getting old. "You can call me Returner all you want but as long as you call me by my real name in front of others. It's getting weird you running around on the street shouting Returner all the time."

He smiled and nodded emphatically, "Yes Zune-Zune do whatever Returner asks!"

All I could do was sigh slowly again then ask, "Zune just don't ever say it like that again."

He gave one slight nod and then turned to walk off into the lab. The lab was now for the most part repaired, it was nowhere near as impressive or streamlined as it had once been. That was mostly because I still hadn't been able to reactivate the labs A.I. I still had the future watch but something had happened to the program inside it. Whether it was the time travel or the EM pulse of a sun going nova I didn't know but I favored the latter. All that did was make me question if the device itself survived.

"Zune has anyone tried to come down today?" I asked as I walked over to the glass case that held the future tech. Inside was one of the two survival suits, Rarity was still examining the other. The case also held the watch, Zune's sword and his pistol along with the original Alicorn Rig.

"No, Lord Spike came by earlier. Lord Spike said that the War Master and Bars Sparkle and Rarity, would be by later."

I sighed and said “Alright.” I then turned back towards the center of the lab. “You did as Twilight asked and managed not to refer to Spike as a lord, right?" I asked in a justifiably half distracted manner. My mind had just fully processed who Zune was referring to by War Master.

"Zune do as Bar Sparkle asked. Lord Spike has not matured to the point to handle Lord Spikes title," he said in a very proper fashion as if quoting a great individual. I guess in his case he was.

"You said Logia will be coming as well," I added while doing my best to control my voice. Just the idea of her showing back up had my heart racing, and I silently cursed myself for that reaction. Yes I had resigned myself to living in this world, and yes, I thought I had expected everything that entailed. To be specific problem I had was not one of different species but that my body reacted to the mere mention of her name. "You know she might not become a War Master, that reality is on a different path than our own."

"Yes," replied Zune. "The War Master may never become a War Master but will always have the capacity to be a War Master."

"But she hasn't earned that title yet, she doesn't know about that capacity within her. It might strike her as a little odd you referring to her by that," I countered.

He looked at me thoughtfully, "Then what should Zune-Zune refer to the War Master as?"

"Well first idea is Logia," I said plainly. His abhorrent reaction made me reconsider that option, "How about an honorific that is not tied to the War Master title. Miss, Mistress, Madam whatever you see fit." He started to reply but I cut him off, "Not War Master." He was quiet for a moment then began to speak and once again I cut him off, "or War Mistress."

Zune looked at the ground and made his signature ticking noise, as he began to slowly walk around the lab. He muttered to himself and walked into the corner where he sat down in silence.

Watching him made me feel as if I had just scolded a puppy. "Good God. Zune, I'm not mad at you. I'm just trying to maintain control of information."

He looked at me with a confused expression and asked, "Why, Returner? Why have Zune-Zune lie about what Zune-Zune knows?"

"It's not lying," I said with a sigh that twisted into a smile before continuing. "It's just an omission of information. You will eventually be able to to address her however you see fit but first we need to explain the title. It's like how Twilight and the others were caught off guard by the Bar titles."

Zune made the clicking noise again, this time it was much more energetic than previous. "Zune-Zune understands, Zune-Zune doesn't want another slap." He rubbed his nose as he spoke remembering his encounter with Rarity and how in his haste he rushed into her room without introduction and ended up prostrating himself over, as she described them, her unmentionables. What a pony that normally wore nothing would do with what looked lingerie was a thought that baffled me.

Maybe they are like the Ferengi and their reverse striptease? said a now familiar voice in my mind.

Cricket, you're not helping, I thought in reply.

Sorry, couldn't help myself. The movie has been boring for so long I can't help but make jokes now. I felt a lazy smile as this thought came through.

The short interchange took less than a second but it was always disconcerting as hell when a voice in your head actually has a conversation with you. It was even worse when he wanted a face to face talk pulling me into my own mind just for some discussion that more often than not was pointless. The headache that always came afterward made even the worst hangover seem tolerable. For some reason though I put up with him, probably because I had to can't really evict him. The worst part was that despite all the problems he caused, he had been a source of sound advice and solid ideas. Even more so in the months since Jack had been disabled but that was all about to change.

"Zune don't worry about it, if you slip up before we can explain everything the worst that will happen is she'll just get confused." I said then smiled softly and walked around my lab.

It was my lab now, the new design while heavily based on Jacks old one belonged to me. My design sense and flair had changed things along with some help from Zune and his mining laser. Alcoves were bigger changing the round room into a more gear shaped one. One of the gear's teeth now lead to the surface, the entrance hidden by a house currently under construction. That entrance also allowed me to move the old station wagon to it's new home. The other alcoves held the construction bay, storage rooms, and finally a reinforced server room. The raised central platform of the original lab still was there as were the monitors however they were laid out in a pattern that worked better for me. The biggest change was from the clean bright whites of Jack's lab to the more docile earth tones I enjoyed.

My smile spread a little more as I began manipulating the controls of one of the nearby devices. There was one major thing Jack's lab was lacking, a good audio system. It wasn't now. The sound of Bach began to drift out of the labs speaker system. While I knew home was a far distant place that I would never see again, the sounds of home were a pleasant reminder of who and what I was. The only major downside that I had found since coming to Equestria was the lack of hands. Though it wasn't the only problem I had with the miscalculation that landed me here and took away my human body. It all felt like a bad Quantum Leap parody.

"Returner," I heard Zune at the same time as I felt him poke my shoulder.  He backed away quickly when I jumped and stood tapping two long fingers together nervously as he gathered up the nerve to speak.

"Zune, don't panic," my voice sounding as exhausted at this behavior as I felt.  I continued to speak as I turned to face him, "Look Zune, calm down and think. We have been working together for what a little under half a year now? You should know by now I'm not like the me in those stories you've heard."

"Zune-Zune is sorry Returner, Returner was not moving," He spoke in an almost whisper.

I smiled and said, "It was no big deal Zune, I was just lost in memories."

He returned the smile and looked up as he spoke slowly, "Zune-Zune forgets sometimes that Returner is not Returner of legend. Returner's story grew but Returner was a reluctant hero that did not want to be remembered."

I blinked a few times a little shocked at Zune's analysis of me and then laughed. It was a good laugh and deep, if I still had toes it would have come from them. It been a long time since I had laughed this much and it felt good. "Zune, I'm not a hero. What I am is, arrogant, hard headed, and lucky as hell."

He made his ticking noise as he shook his head, "Returner is hero, all stories of Returner say that. No stories could have been made about Returner after Returner left. That means Returner stories all started in truth then grew."

I placed a hoof against my head and let out a long sigh before speaking. "Look if I had my choice I would sit on my butt all day and goof off but I can't. I have no choice but to clean up my mess."

"Returner always have choice. That Returner does not see it means that the Returner is good, here," as he finished talking he patted his hand against his chest.

"I agree with the Diamond Dog," said a voice that echoed through the lab. "Though if he learned to use pronouns it would make him a little easier on the ears."

I turned towards the voice knowing who it belonged to and found myself lacking any form of communication due to my jaw hanging open. I was staring at Logia and she was unchanged from last I saw her. A white unicorn, her mane and tail turquoise with a single purple stripe. I gathered myself mentally and began rapidly running through points of possible conversation before grabbing one that wouldn't lead to awkwardness. "We have been working on that," I said as I met her eyes. "Logia this is Zune-Zune, or Zune as everyone else calls him. Zune this is Logia." I gesture back and forth as I said there names and Zune bowed.

Logia smiled warmly towards Zune and said, "It is a pleasure to meet you." Zune began to babble but I knew both of us were ignoring him. When her turquoise eyes met mine a smile full of emotion spread across her face, confidence, arrogance, slyness and an almost predatory smirk mixed in.

I walked around the central platform and down into the lab space. "It's been a long time," I said, a goofy smile spreading across my face. "Why haven't you come by?" I asked and immediately regretted it.

Her smile lost some of it's predatory nature and I immediately missed that, it simmered down to a simple friendly smile before she spoke. "I told you if you wanted to talk just get a hold of me." She shook her head and laughed, "I was out living my life. Despite everything that happened I still am pursuing my career in archeology and as such I didn't have time to spontaneously hop over and say hi."

"That makes sense," I muttered.

 “I see you remodeled,” She said as she walked around the lower circular path that went past all of the alcoves stopping at the one that held the future tech. For a moment I thought she was going to ask but then she continued around to the garage. “You know I have never seen this before, but it’s the vehicle you showed up in right?”

“Yeah that’s the old station wagon,” I replied. My voice carried the slight notes of sadness that I felt as I continued, “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to drive her again.”

Logia looked up from inspecting the interior of the wagon and asked, “Why? You built the Suit and Alicorn Rig, why couldn’t you make this thing work again?”

“Because I don’t want to butcher everything about it. This world can’t process the fuel for it, and it wouldn’t feel right to pull the engine out.” I looked at the wagon, there were a lot of memories within that beast. Camping trips, vacations, collage all tied to that four wheeled linch pin.

Logia rolled her eyes slightly as she slowly spoke, “So what you’re saying is that even though you have the ability to change dirt, trees, and stone into those metal cylinders of death, you can't create the fuel you need?”

        I stared at her with a blank expression as the thought, Why the hell didn’t I think of that, raced through my head. “I guess I could do that, but I’ll have to get Jack back first. I don’t know all the ancillary chemicals in gasoline, he might.”

        She raised one eyebrow and asked, “Back from where?”

        “There was a disaster in the lab and I haven't brought him back online,” I answered while wondering how much she already knew.

        She walked back into the lab proper and around to the stairs leading to the raised platform. I walked along the center platform and met her at the stairs. She looked down for a moment as I was walking down to her, when she looked up she began to speak. “So what’s your plan?”

        “Well what do you know?” I walked over to the alcove that held a table and cushions as I continued to speak, “I haven’t talked to you about anything since I woke up in the hospital. I don’t  know what else you have been told.”

        “Quite a bit actually,” she said with a smile. “After your display with that battlesuit Dressage upped their ante and increased the generousness of the recruitment offers. Even more so after the rumor of the suit going rouge reached their ears. Then there was the even more absurd one about you taking a temporal jaunt about half a year ago,” she said with a lopsided smile.

        My mind was running with what I had been told. There had to be some spies somewhere close to the ones I trusted here or the ones they trusted in Canterlot. It also seemed that Dressage was not responsible for the theft of the suit and that meant that most likely it had already gone rogue. I felt my smile shift to a frown when I thought, This is even worse than if Dressage had stolen it. At least I would have had somewhere to start if they had.

Or they could be playing with misinformation, added Cricket. Why would they let her out of anyone, know the truth.

So I haven’t actually gained anything have I? I thought back.

Nope, this thought was sent with a sense of a smug smile.

Both Logia and I jumped when Zune began to speak, I know I had forgotten about him being here. “But Returner did go and return Wa-,” He quickly clamped his paws over his mouth. “Zune-Zune sorry, Zune-Zune means Miss Logia, Returner brought Zune-Zune back with Returner.”

I almost laughed at Zune he was trying his best and struggling. I decided to make it easier on him and tell Logia all of it. “Yeah, you’re very well informed. Zune came from the future, I went and came back. The suit has probably gone rogue and in the future I visited I wasn’t around to stop it. You ended up leading the fight and gained the title of War Master, and that’s the name Zune knows you by.”

Her smile grew and she began to laugh, “You can’t be serious. You went to the future and then came back.” She caught her breath before asking, “How?”

“I tried to go home, screwed up and arrived on a mostly dead world in the future. The sun was going to blow up but Celestia was holding it back. Most things had left the planet for greener pastures as it were. The Ponies, Dragons and everything else had moved into space. Celestia let the sun go and Luna used the reflected power to send me back here before attaching  their power base to a different star system.”

Her laughter returned and I stood there patiently waiting for her to stop. When she did she looked me over and the asked, “You’re serious aren't you?”

“Yes, yes I am,” I answered with a bit of a laugh. Then asked in a much more serious voice, “Now what was that about Dressage and recruitment?”

She looked at me, swallowed and the walked past me to the table as she spoke. “They have been recruiting eyes and ears all over the place from the royal palace to the neighborhood coffee shop. That combined with their already established information network means they are almost impossible to get away from and you know they see me as a lost child. They want me back. The last offer that was made was that if I joined them and then joined you on your search for the Suit I would have access to their funds, agents and material.”

“So you take them up on it?” I asked with a grin.

She about faced and stared at me in a familiar fashion a slight flash of anger in them, it made me smile wider. “Steel why would you think that?” she half yelled at me.

“Now that’s the Logia I remember,” I said still wearing a smile. “I wouldn’t think you had joined them even if you took them up on the offer. If it had been me I would have accepted and the used them as much as they used me.”

“You obviously don’t know who you would be messing with,” she replied.

“True I don’t know them but I still would place my bet on me.” I said as I let my smile fall. “Now that all of that is out of the way how about some questions that actually matter. How have you been?”

She let out a soft laugh this time and looked me in the eyes that shone with her her smile. “I’ve been just fine. I was a little concerned at first since I hadn’t heard anything from you but with my job at the university, continuing my education and dodging Dressage I stayed busy.”

“And you’re not busy now?” I asked.

“I 'm extremely busy right now but I needed to see you,” she said with a slight blush.

“Oh, I left that much of a...” A thought had crossed my mind that made me trail off. “You’re not pregnant are you?”

She looked at me with a horrified face before yelling, “What!?”

“I just was trying to think of a reason why you would come back, and that just popped out.” I had a feeling I was going to need a tall ladder fairly soon with the way I was digging this hole. “I’m sorry,” I said as I hung my head.

She shook her head as she spoke this time. “For Celestia’s sake Steel you know so much but have no grasp on the basics of this world.” She walked up beside me and almost whispered in my ear, “Mares can only get pregnant during a two week window in the spring.”

I felt the blood rush to my face as I said, “That’s convenient.” I glanced around and then asked, “So why did you need to see me?”

“Because I needed to know what we had between us. I’ve had several stallions show interest in me since we parted and I had thought about moving on. Sometimes I think I should but every time I try I start thinking of you again.” I could hear the wavering in her voice as she spoke.

“Honestly Logia I have no clue. Yes I like you, I might even say I’m infatuated with you, and yes you are the one person, ah, pony I feel the closest to.” I spoke quickly as if I waited these words would bind in my throat. However my next few sentence were full of fumbled words. “I don’t know what I’m doing honestly. My mind is tearing itself apart over you. My heart feels like it’s going to burst out of my chest when you are around but then part of me hangs up on the fact that you are different from me.” After several failed attempts to continue I finally managed to say, “I know on the outside you and I are the same but in my core I’m still human and you and your world are alien to me. I care about you but there is a part of me, a small part holding me back.”

Everyone was silent for a moment and then I heard a sad sniffing noise from off to the side. I turned and saw Zune standing there tears rolling down his face and a runny nose. I squeezed my eyes shut and felt my own pinched up tears get pushed out of my eyes before saying, “Zune can you do me a favor? Go take a break, leave the lab for a half hour or so, have lunch or something.”

“But Zune-Zune wants to stay. Zune-Zune wants to see Bar Twilight and Bar Rarity. Zune-Zune also wants to see Spirit.” He rubbed his nose with the back of his paw and smiled.

I sighed sometimes it was like dealing with a child. “Zune, you have been down here long enough, why don’t you go out and explore for a little bit.” In general the ponies had been a little wary of Zune but the whole town quickly discovered that he was different from most of the other Diamond Dogs. He was now as accepted in town as Twilight’s little zilla, Spike.

“But,” he started again like a little kid but I cut him off.

“Zune go. I have some things I want to talk to Logia about in private.” He began a dog like whine and I shook my head slightly knowing that he didn't understand. As I walked over to him I continued to speak trying to make my point clear. “Zune I have some things I want to talk to Logia about and I think we both would feel more comfortable without you here.”

He looked at me as he barely held back his tears, his face twisted into a pout. “Zune-Zune sorry,” he cried. “Zune-Zune does not want to leave Returner. Zune-Zune is Returners servant. ”

“Damn it Zune,,just go. You can come back in an hour,” I grumbled at him.

He slowly began to trudge towards the exit and I heard mumble, “Zune-Zune sorry, Zune-Zune does not want Returner angry. Zune-Zune sorry.”

I shook my head again. This wasn't the first time Zune had done this. He behaved like a dog, and if dogs back home were a guide to reading him he saw me asking for privacy as the same as exiling him from the pack. After he left I turned back towards Logia and said, “This isn't the first time for this he’ll be okay.”

She gave me a suspicious look and asked, “Why did you send him away? You already have talked about your emotions and everything un-macho.”

“I don’t care about that. Emotions are emotions, everyone has them so why hide them. What I wanted to talk to you about is that as you know I'm going out to hunt down my suit. I don’t know if it was stolen but more likely walked out on it’s own. I want to know if you would come along.” I tried to keep my face as neutral as possible as I asked.

“You sent him out of here to ask me that?” She asked studying me.

I awkwardly scratched behind my head and looked away as I answered, “Well, I know him and he has a kind of hero worship for anyone from this time frame. I didn’t want you influenced by what either of us wanted. If you want to come with us I want you come of your own accord.”

She laughed, “Steel you are the strangest...” She paused and I could see her roll several words around in her mouth before finally saying, “thing I have ever met.” She then looked at me a smile still on her lips as she said, “Before I agree to this trip I need to know why you want me out of everypony else that you know.”

“Well,” I said stretching the word as I formed my thoughts. “I’m not from this world and as you know, I know almost nothing about it and Zune is from a time where this world is a massive desert. He is about as knowledgeable as I am about the current time, and I don’t have many ponies that I can ask to go on this trip.” This was an understatement other than Logia and the two from Dressage the only ponies I knew well enough to consider asking were the six element bearers. “I trust you Logia, I know some of what you can do so I know that you can hold your own and I value your input. I don’t know what will happen but if I had to choose one person to bring along with me I would chose you.”

Her smile grew as I spoke and when I finished she said, “You said person again.”

I shook my head as I looked at the ground, “I don’t think I’ll ever get that right.”

She walked up beside me and put a fetlock to my chin lifting my face to look at hers. “Steel,” as she spoke it seemed like the world slowed down to a crawl. “I will go with you. If I didn’t I would be constantly worrying about you. From what I’ve seen of Zune he is kind but innocent and you are so far out of touch with this world it’s laughable.”

I cut her words off as impulse took over and I planted a kiss on her lips. That resulted in me receiving a slap from her. She then shouted, “Don’t do that without warning me.”

I just sat there laughing as I rubbed the slap mark on my cheek.

Her face showed her irritation but it soon broke into a smile as well. Then she asked, “So when do we leave?”

I calmed my laughter enough to answer, “I have some things to do first to get ready. In fact today the plan is to reactivate Jack.”

She sat down facing me and said, “So I take it you have no plan for hunting the suit?”

“Not much of one,” I replied. “I'm now thinking of getting the wagon running before heading out though. It could be useful. Other than that and getting Jack working my plan was to go out and investigate. I don’t know what it’s doing or why it left but in Zune’s timeline it becomes a Warlord ruling the world for several hundred years.” I looked at her now straight in her eyes as I said, “It is part of my mess and if nothing else I’m going to clean up that mess.”