“Let ‘er fly, cuz!”
Following Braeburn’s instructions, Caramel opened his mouth and let the rope he’d been pulling zip away. The beam shot straight up-right and pointed skyward.
“YEEEEEEE-HAW!” The assembled ponies of Appleloosa cheered, the gigantic pillar of salt finally erected. Thirsty, the town salt enthusiast, burst into tears and hugged his entire body to the huge block of pure spice. Several ponies pulled him away a few seconds later when they realized he had begun taking chunks of the pillar off by the mouthful.
Caramel felt his cousin’s foreleg on his shoulder. “Nice job, cousin. Once we get the structure put up around this here pillar, we’ll have ourselves the first salt-tower in western Equestria.”
A thought occurred to the candy-colored stallion. “Uh… Braeburn… not to be a buzz kill, but wouldn’t it have made more sense to build the tower and then pour in the salt?”
Braeburn stared at him. “I don’t follow.”
Caramel raised an eyebrow. “You don’t?”
“Not in the least.”
Caramel shook his head. “Why are you always dumb as a rock in my dreams, cousin?”
Braeburn didn’t answer. He just faded away into nothingness.
Caramel sighed as the world around him vanished into dust. He hated when things like that happened. It tended to ruin the whole experience. Now he had a whole night’s sleep to endure and no dream to help him endure it.
Well… there was one dream.
A small smirk on his lips, Caramel set to work assembling one of his favorite fantasies. In a matter of seconds, the scene was set; a lush palatial estate in Saddle Arabia, the kind he’d read about in stories as a colt. Torches and candles lined the walls, their smoke carrying forth the smell of sweet incense. In the center of the room was a massive circular bed covered in what appeared to be the most comfortable blankets and pillows known to pony-kind. Outside the huge open air window the stars twinkled and the moon almost seemed to watch the goings-on below.
Caramel looked down and found himself now wearing the traditional garb of a sultan, all rich silk and exotic feathers. All that remained to be created was the final piece of his fantasy.
The centerpiece.
He blinked and there she was.
The pink mare was stretched seductively on her side, her head resting on an upturned hoof. Her plump form, curvy in all the right places, had a silk sheet over it so thin it was see-through. Her face was covered in a matching pink veil and he could see her smile through it. Her eyes watched him with pure want. “Greetings, oh mighty one.” She whispered huskily.
Falling into character, Caramel drew himself to his full height. “Greetings to you, Pink Maiden.” He said, trying to deepen his voice. “I deliberated long in my summoning you from the harem this evening.” He trotted over to the bed’s edge. “I trust you will prove my decision… worthwhile.”
The pink mare giggled as she rolled onto her back and beckoned with a perfectly groomed hoof. “Join me, oh great one, and I will show you exactly how worthwhile your choice was.”
Needing no further encouragement, Caramel practically leaped onto the bed and crawled on top of the mare, kissing her passionately. Their hooves roamed freely and tongues wrestled. They broke for air and Carmel pushed himself up to take in the beauty beneath him. The moon winked from the corner of his eye and giggled.
The moon giggled.
Carmel’s neck snapped around so fast that he heard it crack. His eyes widened when the moon almost seemed to melt from the sky and puddle on the floor. A lithe feminine form began to emerge from the luminescent pool as Caramel’s fantasy faded into nothingness.
When his dream had fully dissipated, only Princess Luna stood before him with a wizened grin on her face. “You should be proud, Caramel. So few ponies these days have the ability to lucid dream.” She recalled the foreign setting of the dream she’d just witnessed. “Fewer still are those who can dream in such… detail.”
Caramel fell into a bow from force of habit. “Princess Luna! I…was…um… I…” He peeked up from between his hooves. “Why are you here?”
Luna motioned for him to stand. “As princess of the night, it is one of our solemn duties to patrol the dreamscape and observe the ponies of Equestria while they sleep. We aid good ponies with good dreams, and if the occasion calls for it, punish the wicked with terrible nightmares.”
Caramel felt himself starting to cower again. “Is that why you’re here? To punish me?”
“Why would we punish thee? Thou hast done nothing wrong.”
“I haven’t?”
Luna smiled and shook her head. “Of course not. It’s perfectly normal for ponies to have your kind of dreams, especially stallions. Compared to some of the other dreams we have witnessed, yours was quite tame.” She shuddered as she remembered one dream in particular. “There is one stallion in Ponyville with a strange affinity for jelly jars…”
Caramel laughed. “I think I know the guy you’re talkin’ about. I’m from Ponyville, y’know.”
“We figured as much. We thought we recognized that mare in your dream.” She waved a hoof and a hazy image of the Pink Maiden appeared. “Pinkie Pie?”
Caramel nodded, entranced even by a simple image of his precious pastry chef.
“Is she a mere fantasy of yours? Or have you already acted on your desires?”
“Oh, we’ve acted.” Caramel chuckled. “I lost count at fourteen acts.”
This time Luna laughed. “You are so candid with your affections, young Caramel. It is really quite refreshing.”
Caramel joined her in laughing. “Just blame my frank country raisin,’ ma’am.”
Luna waved her hoof again and the image of the Pink Maiden vanished. Noting the disappointed look in the earth pony’s eyes, Luna raised an eyebrow. “What vexes thee?”
Caramel shuffled his hooves in embarrassment. “Oh, nothin’ really ma’am. It’s just…”
“Go on.”
“It’s just that this is the only time that I get to see Pinkie Pie these days.”
Luna cocked her head in confusion. “We do not understand? Did you not say you were a native of Ponyville?”
“I am, ma’am, but presently I’m out in the desert helpin’ my cousin with a few things.”
Understanding at last, Luna nodded sagely. “So you are separated by your devotion to family just as much as the scorching sands…”
Caramel shrugged. “Never heard it put quite that way before, but I guess you’re right.” He concentrated and summoned an image of his own; not the Pink Maiden this time, but just plain Pinkie Pie. “She writes me every day. Can you believe that? Every. Single. Day. But even that’s just no substitute for the real thing.” He reached out a hoof and watched as it passed right through the illusion. “At least in my dreams I can pretend she’s here with me. It helps ease that pain of being away from her.” The image faded and he looked back at Princess Luna just in time to see her wiping something from the corner of her eye. “Princess?”
Luna quickly recovered. “We are fine, young stallion. Perfectly fine.”
Caramel decided to press his luck. “Do you have a special somepony, yer majesty?”
Luna froze and looked away. “We did not use that term in our day, but… yes, you could certainly say that we have somepony like that.”
“Anypony I know?”
Luna offered the ghost of a smile. “Let us just say that our love life is… complicated.”
Caramel rolled his eyes. “I’m sure. He’s probably a noble prince from some far off empire or some such. A real knight in shining armor.”
The ghost of a smile of the princess of the night’s face became a full on smirk. “You could very well call him that.” She recovered and extended her hoof. “But enough about these things, Caramel Apple. We beseech thee; take our hoof.”
Caramel looked from the hoof to the princess’ face and then back to the hoof again. “Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but may I ask why?”
Luna smiled. “Your words do you well and we wish to reward thee.”
“Reward? How?”
“Touch my hoof, Caramel.”
Deciding he really had nothing to lose, Caramel gulped and touched his hoof to hers.
The world around them shimmered, then seemed to… wave, like ripples in the water after a stone was thrown in. A new image began to fade in. A new smell began to waft through the air.
The scent of desserts swam through Caramel’s nostrils. “Where are we?”
“Is it not obvious?”
The waving around them ceased and Caramel took in the new world around them. They were surrounded on all sides by mountains made of…
Cake?
Yes. Mountains and mountains of nothing but cake. Chocolate cake, vanilla cake, devil’s food cake, angel food cake, rum-cake… there weren’t really this many kinds of cake in Equestria, were there?
“I still don’t…” A familiar happy hum drifted towards him from a nearby clearing. He knew that sound anywhere. “Pinkie Pie?” It did indeed appear to be her sitting at a work-bench…
“Shhh!” Luna roughly shoved him into a nearby pile of cupcakes so that he was hidden from view. “Won’t this be nicer as a surprise?” Not letting him answer, she approached the apprentice baker. “Greetings, Pinkie Pie.”
The Bearer of the Element of Laughter spun in her seat and smiled happily at her visitor. “PRINCESS LUNA! OMIGOSH, I’m so happy you’re here! You haven’t visited me in AGES!” She leapt from her work station and engulfed the princess in a crushing bear-hug.
“It is… good to see you… as well…” Luna struggled out while trying desperately to breathe.
Sensing the princess’ problem, Pinkie released her and happily bounced back to her work table. Spread across it were all manner of baking paraphernalia, from rolling pins to pans of various shapes and sizes. Ingredients like eggs and huge bags of flour were piled sky high, held aloft by dream physics.
Luna looked at the piles in quiet amazement. “Still trying to figure out the perfect cake, are we?”
Pinkie nodded as she continued beating the eggs in the bowl in front of her.
Luna chuckled. “You have the power to control your dreams down to the smallest detail… and yet most nights you simply use it to bake cakes and pastries.”
Pinkie giggled. “Of course? What else would I use it for? Besides...” She looked back at the princess with a knowing smile. “I know how much you enjoy your midnight snacks.”
Luna said nothing, just grabbed a slice of cake from one of the piles to her left. “You can blame our sister for getting us hooked on these confectionary treats.” She took a large bite and chewed contentedly. “This flavor is new to us. Boysenberry?”
Pinkie shook her head.
“Lemon?”
“Caramel.”
In his hiding place of cupcakes, Caramel’s ears perked up.
Luna swallowed her mouthful and regarded the cake. “Delicious, as usual.” She noted a change in Pinkie’s posture; a slight slump in the shoulders, the tiniest droop in the tail. “Art thou alright, Pinkie Pie?” Luna made her way over to the mare and put a foreleg about her shoulders. “Art thou having the nightmares again? About Rainbow Dash?”
Pinkie quickly shook her head no.
“So our spell is still in effect. Good. Good ponies like thee don’t deserve such wretched dreams.” Luna brushed a stray curl of mane from her dream friend’s face. “What’s wrong?”
Pinkie sighed and looked down at the bowl of beaten eggs. “It’s silly.”
“Pinkie, we are surrounded by a range of mountains constructed entirely from baked foods. ‘Silly’ does not exist here.”
Pinkie giggled. “You’re right. It’s… it’s about a guy.” She blushed.
Luna smiled. “We suspected as much. What is his name?”
“You wouldn’t know him. He’s one of Applejack’s cousins.”
“Is his name… Caramel?”
Pinkie stared at her in wide-eyed shock. “How did you know?!”
Luna rolled her eyes. “A lucky guess. Why are you so sad if your heart is so full? Does this ‘Caramel’ not know of your feelings for him?”
“Oh, he knows.” Pinkie grinned widely. “He knows that better than anything.”
“Then why the sadness?”
Pinkie focused on the bowl and shifted it into a ball of dough that she began rolling around in a pile of flour. “He’s out of town helping his cousin with some things in Appleloosa. We only got to spend a day together before he had to leave.” She leaned back and looked up into the sky where cotton candy clouds lazily floated by. “But what a day it was.”
Caramel was inclined to agree.
“When will he return?”
Pinkie shrugged her shoulders and went back to kneading. “No idea. I write him every day and he writes me back whenever he can.” She looked down at the dough she’d unconsciously shaped into a stylized heart. “I really miss him.” She began to add chocolate chips to the creation. “I don’t think he realizes exactly how much I like him.”
“Why not?” Luna asked, using her wings to sneak another slice of cake from the pile behind her.
“I think he thinks that I just decided to hook up with him out of the blue, but the truth is that I’d had my eye on him for months.” She paused, examined the display of chips, and then resumed decorating. “I just never worked up the courage to just trot on up to him and ask him out. Then Fluttershy and Big Mac got married.”
Luna choked on her piece of cake. “Yes, we remember that night… vaguely.” She said, coughing. “We had a bit too much to drink that night, no thanks to Celestia.”
“You and me both, sister.” Pinkie laughed, dropping a few extra chips on the cake for good measure. “Speaking of, is it true what happened with Twilight?”
Luna smiled knowingly. “That she woke up in the Ponyville Inn with a certain magician and teacher in bed with her?” She laughed. “Absolutely.”
Pinkie laughed even harder. “See, all of us were a little loco in the coco that night.” She summoned a small convection oven from thin air and slid the cake inside. “Maybe that’s why I suddenly got the courage to go up to Caramel and kiss him right there by the dessert table.”
“We take it he reciprocated?”
“Not so much that night, but plenty the next day.”
The two mares shared another long laugh until the oven timer dinged. Together they slid the pan out and took in Pinkie’s latest creation; a large chocolate and caramel cake topped with an intricate portrait of Pinkie Pie and Caramel nuzzling… made completely out of chocolate chips.
Pinkie sighed again as she breathed in the cake’s sweet aroma. “When he gets back, I’m going to bake this for him. Maybe then he’ll get how much I…” She hesitated. “…how much I love him.”
“I think I get that now, sugar.”
Pinkie’s neck whipped around so fast it was a miracle she didn’t get whiplash. “CARAMEL!” She screamed, tackling the stallion even as he emerged from the cupcakes. “But what are you doing here now? Usually I don’t dream of you until later.” She cast a sidelong glance at Princess Luna. “You know, after she leaves and we can get down to business.”
“I’m no dream, sugar. I’m one hundred percent real.”
“But… but how?”
Luna cleared her throat as she made her way over to the reunited pair. “We took the liberty of bringing along Caramel’s dream form after he told us how much he missed thee. We haven’t heard a stallion speak so lovingly of a mare since…” She stopped herself. “…for a very long time, anyway.”
Pinkie looked at her stallion with wetness in her eyes. “Really? So… you heard all that?”
“Every word. And I gotta say…” He kissed her, long and soft, breathing in that sugar smell that always surrounded her. They parted and he rested his forehead against hers. “…I gotta say that I think I love you too.”
Pinkie’s smile could have reached all the way around her head if her lips hadn’t been too busy mashing themselves against Caramel’s.
Luna again cleared her throat and the pair parted to look up at her. “Rare is a love such as this seen these days, little ponies. So, with that in mind, we believe a gift is in order.” Her horn lit and again the world around them again began to ripple. In seconds, the ripple had faded.
Nothing had changed.
“What was that?” Caramel asked.
“We have taken the liberty of combining your dreamscapes. From now on, whenever you sleep, you will find yourselves here. You can then share in each other’s company until you wake the next morning.”
“Really?” Pinkie jumped up and began to bounce in pure delight. “So every time I go to bed I get to see Caramel? Like, for real?”
Luna nodded. “We trust this will be an adequate substitute until you are at last reunited.”
Caramel laughed, getting to his hooves and doing his best to hold onto the rapidly bouncing mare he loved. “Well now I’m just not gonna wanna wake up.”
Luna dipped her head. “We will leave you both to your privacy most nights, but this gift does not come without a fee.” She looked to Pinkie. “If you catch our drift.”
Pinkie stopped bouncing everything except for her rapidly nodding head. “I’ll keep plenty of fresh baked snacks ready for you.”
Luna smiled widely and gave a slight bow. “Then we shall leave you to it then. Pinkie, we believe Caramel has a certain dream you’d be most interested in.”
As she walked away, Caramel called out. “Hey, Princess Luna!”
She looked back. “Yes?”
“There’s still some ponies out there who say you’re no good. But they’re wrong.” He winked at her. “You’re the nicest pony I ever did meet. Thank you.”
Luna looked away. “Nice? Are we nice?” Her mind seemed (to Caramel anyway) to be drifting, almost as though she were thinking back on a memory. “Sometimes we really wonder about that, Caramel.”
There was the ripple effect again, and she was gone.
Pinkie looked at her special somepony with lidded eyes. “So, stud; what kind of dream was she talking about?”
Without a word, Caramel closed his eyes and imagined the sumptuous palace from his fantasy of the Pink Maiden. When his eyes again opened, they found the flame-lined walls, the opulent bed… and the silk-draped mare atop it.
She was no fantasy this time. This time she was quite real.
He approached her as she took in the surroundings. “I think I like this dream.” She whispered lustily, advancing on him in a low crawl.
Something nagged at Caramel’s thoughts. “Hey Pinkie?”
“Hmmm?”
“What do you think she meant by that? About not knowing if she was nice or not?”
“Caramel, sweetie…” Her voice came from underneath him. “At the moment I really don’t care.”
A millisecond later Caramel didn’t really care either.
