Never Aloneby JaggedChaptersPrologue: Before the NightChapter One: Nightmare NightChapter Two: How to be Awesome, Pt. 1Chapter Three: How to be Awesome, Pt.2Prologue: Before the Night"I'm going out, Celly!!" Luna practically screamed. She'd been running around the castle all day, waiting for nighttime to approach so that she could travel to Ponyville. Celestia sighed warily. Ever since Luna learned about Nightmare Night, she'd been obsessed with it! And even worse, she couldn't be convinced to do anything but the most stupid way of greeting them! Calm down, Celly. She's just come back, and still has to adjust. Just let her be. What's the worst that could happen? I don't know, how about public lynching?! They still haven't forgotten about Nightmare Moon, and she's still going to go out and shout at them in a bat-cloak!! First of all, it's not shouting. It's just the Royal Canterlot voice! Also, they're *all** wearing something like the bat-cloak. She'd stick out if she wasn't wearing something similar.* Celestia realized that she was back into her inner-monologuing. She'd been doing that since about, oh, say two hundred years after the rebellion. It grew just a little lonely, being the only immortal around. Just...keep it calm. You can't hardly stop her anyway... Celestia was broken from her internal ramblings when her little sister ran straight into the nearest dresser, the dark blue mare looking around ashamedly when one of Celestia’s priceless vases fell to the ground and shattered. The older princess gave Luna a somewhat annoyed look. “Uh…oops?” Celestia sighed for the billionth time that night. “Look, Luna, I know this night must probably seem pretty special to you, especially since it didn’t exist while you were still caught up on the moon, but just try and pay attention.” The princess of the night stared fixedly at her older counterpart. Celestia couldn’t help but hesitate, not wanting to hurt her younger sibling’s feelings too badly. “Um…I understand that you want to be appreciated by the ponies around you, but you have to keep a straight head on your shoulders. Going around traipsing as Nightmare Moon isn’t going to make people like you. There hasn’t been enough time since her last appearance for such a show of power to not intimidate them. Ponies just aren’t like they used to be…” The Sun Goddess mentally face-hooved at her lack of skills when it came to dealing with her sister. They'd never been very good at communicating, even though both of them had the best of intentions. Their words always seemed garbled and confused, and at times they took offense for things neither of them meant to say. The Nightmare Moon incident didn't help these matters. Great, yet another faux pa with your younger sister. Congratulations, you've managed to hurt her forth the bazillionth time in your pathetic life! Just shut up, Celly. I don't need this on top of everything... Luna looked somewhat crestfallen. “I know what you mean, sis, but I’ve got to give this a try! I…I don’t have any friends anymore. Everyone…everypony I ever knew… are gone. I can’t bring them back, and if there’s an afterlife, it doesn’t matter. I’m immortal, and I’m never going to see them again!” Wonderful, not only did you manage to hurt her feelings, but added the low blow of immortality to it. Score: Stupidity, 1, Celly, 0. Just try not to be such a dingus. By now there were tears flowing from Luna’s eyes, but she suppressed the urge to dash away from her sister. “I know that anyone I befriend here is just going to die anyway. There’s no saving them from Death. There will come a time, their time, for them to follow him into the Nether. After that, there will be no more “hellos”, or “goodbyes”. All there will be are my memories, like there are now.” Celestia was probably the only pony alive who truly understood what Luna was saying, and it cut her deeply. She didn’t want her little sister to be in such pain, but was there really a way to avoid it? The elder princess started to feel her own tears forming in her eyes when she thought about all of her friends, of the time that she truly loved…The white alicorn quickly cut of the urge to cry. She was the Sun Goddess, and couldn't afford to commit to such weakness. Are you about to cry, Celly? Don't you dare!! How can I help it? She's just as alone as I am. And now she understands what I can hardly bear... Celestia looked deeply into her sister's eyes, which met her gaze evenly. There were tears there, but also a fair amount of confidence and maturity that wasn't there before. Luna spoke up again. “But just because they are dead and gone doesn’t mean I can’t have friends! Eternity will only be bearable with others around you, people you can support, encourage, to…love. Yes, I don’t just want to be alone. I...I can't be alone! I’ll take my chances with these ponies. They need me, just as I need them.” The alabaster princess was startled at the depth of Luna’s little speech. Was this proud, grown mare that little filly she had once doted on after their parents died? No, she was standing far to tall and proud to be that foal anymore. Maybe she had begun to underestimate her… “Luna…it will only bring more heartache when the time comes for them to die. It will only be the same thing, over and over and over. I should know, I’ve spent the last thousand years trying it, over and over and over. It doesn’t end, nor does the sorrow. This…immortality, it isn’t a privilege! We will have to suffer, and for the sake of those we don’t even know.” The look on the midnight alicorn rent Celestia’s heart. She turned away from her little sister, mulling over the possibilities. Finally, she just gave up. There was really only one way for this to be settled. With yet another heartfelt sigh, Celli turned to look into Luna’s heart-broken eyes. “Fine, have your wish. But be aware that I have warned you of the consequences. If you start down this path, there’s no coming back! Only misery will follow, and I have no desire to see you in any more pain than you already are in. I've been down that road, even found a stallion I loved. I still miss him, so much! But I know that he's not coming back, and all I have left are those few sweet moments we had together, the times when it was just us. I...try to be careful. And good luck.” Celestia watched lovingly as her little sister brightened up. She wasn’t particularly surprised when Luna jumped up and threw her in the tightest embrace she had felt in years. “Oh thank you, thank you sis! I won’t let you down! I just…I gotta go!!” With that, the moon princess blazed out the room as if she had rocket boosters strapped to her instead of wings. Celestia stared after where she had just been a moment earlier, before turning around to stride towards the simple but elegant bed. After slumping down, she turned to look at her doorway. “I wish you the best of luck, my little sister.” Chapter One: Nightmare NightLuna practically sprinted down the marble halls of Canterlot Castle as she ran toward the loading bay. The servants watched, somewhat confused as to why a normally more refined princess would bound around like some young filly. They would then turn away, absorbed back into their work for the day. The ponies that worked in the ancient halls of Canterlot had no reason to pay more than a little heed to someone who they didn't, and had no likelihood of ever understanding. As she sped down the dark corridors, lit only by the last twinklings of the setting sun, she prepared her magic to call upon the night itself, to rend the moon from its celestial resting place. The light of the day faded into the eternal darkness that she had grown to love, as only a mother can love her foal. There was something about raising it that made Luna feel content, even in the worst of times. The time in which she had spent entombed on its surface only strengthened that bond. The moon sceamed as it was torn from its only real home, sent with shivers into a world it never wished to visit. But Luna persisted, understanding the feeling, the same feeling she had felt as she was torn from her own mother's womb to be thrown into a dark world that only wished to cause her pain. She was still trepidatious about whether or not this world would ever forgive her. But she knew that she had to at least give it a try. I *will** do this, for both them and myself. I won't be brought to my knees again!* She stared longingly up at her moon. How simple it was, for the moon. The very existence of the bright orb, now obstructed by the location of her neighbor, partially between her and the sun, and ever so alone. And yet, the massive entity had little to worry about. It wasn't involved with the ponies on the surface of its sister. It was alone, simple and bittersweet. The Princess of the Night abandoned her musings as she approached the docking bay on the side of the cliff. This design had been truly hers, and hers alone. As far as she was concerned, the air was to a Pegasus (or Alicorn) as the sea was to anypony else. That inspired the concept of placing chariots in the air itself, and she had grown to love it. "Hail Luna!" one of her Night Guards said in a somewhat scripted manner. "Hello, Brutus. Is everything prepared for the journey?" Luna asked, following the standard protocol. "Yes, your highness. Everything is set, and both Blackwing and Noctus are dressed, fitted, and ready upon your command." "Noctus? I haven't seen him around in a while. Has your brother been busy of late?" "You hadn't heard? His first foal was born a few weeks ago. A bright young filly! Now I'm an uncle, and I couldn't be happier." Great going, Luna! Not even bothering to pay attention to your own *guards*?! This is really unacceptable. Luna looked evenly at Brutus, and simply said a quiet but firm "Congratulations", and left it at that. She trotted over to the Night Chariot that she had constructed for her back in the last era, before the whole Nightmare Moon scandal... After donning her cloak, the blue alicorn mounted the chariot, and waited for the pair of winged stallions to take their positions. Moments later, the great steel doors that held the bay shut to the world outside opened, revealing the princess's beautiful night for all the slender and brilliance that it really was. She sighed in contentment as her eyes scanned the cold, yet gorgeous sight which she had just created only a few minutes earlier. The chariot took off, flying with nearly impossible speeds. Luna let the her hair blow around in the night, feeling the wind blow through its presently ethereal form. It still felt marvelous despite being in a state of unreality, and she was enjoying every minute of it. Rainbow Dash had always loved pranks. The kind of brash but amusing humor it gave her had always had its own niche in the darker side of her heart. It was the only reason the cyan mare even bothered to actually befriend Pinkie Pie, and had been what originally got the friendship between her and Gilda started back at flight school. Tonight, the rainbow-maned pegasus decided to play dress up. It was really the only time that she bothered doing so, except when Rarity made her. She still remembered Nightmare Moon's little trick on her with the Shadowbolts, and decided that it would be the most fitting costume on a night celebrating the old hag. It was also a great night for pranks. "Hey Raindrops, you decided to go all Viking on us tonight? I'd never have guessed." Rainbow snickered from the little black raincloud she had made that morning. Thunderlane had always been somewhat of an ass, and now was the best time to make him bray like one! ZZZZZAAAPPPP!!!!!! "I SURRENDER!" the dark coated pegasus shouted, before shooting off into the air, silver mane almost ripped from his skull at the velocity. Rainbow nearly died laughing, and had to rush off with the cloud while Raindrops screamed a very distinct "Rainbow!!" along with a few other words that would make even the most raunchy sailor sweat. Rainbow left her in the dust, despite pushing a cloud that was laden with moisture and static charge. That was...AWESOME!! Let's see who else we can startle... The somewhat brash pegasus wandered around the village, surprising every pony who had not yet been exposed with a sizable charge of electric energy, the bluish bolts barely missing them. It was inevitable that she would eventually come across Twilight, with Spike in tow, of course! There was a very pink mare dressed in a chicken suit eating candy at the rate of a garbage disposal, and they were watching with great interest. One guess who that is. My turn to startle Pinkie! Rainbow hit the cloud with her perfected technique, aiming the bolt just shy of Pinkie's flank. The way that the cotton-candy mare jumped in surprise was priceless. Also, the distinct "bakah!" that followed was making Rainbow's sides hurt with unbridled mirth. "Rainbow Dash! That wasn't very nice!" "Oh, lighten up, old timer! This is the best night of the year for pranks!" "But look what you did to Spike!!" Yeah, yeah, yeah, so he's broken. Who cares? "Aww, its all in good fun!" Rainbow Dash paused for a moment to take in Twilight's appearance. The look seemed to ring some bell in the back of the sky blue mare, but she couldn't quite place it. After a few moments, Twilight noticed the was that her friend was staring at her. "Um, Rainbow Dash?" "Yeah?" "Why are you staring at me?" "I was? Oh, yeah, I was. Uh...the costume is kinda...familiar. What's it supposed to be, egghead?" "Starswirl the Bearded, of course!" Rainbow stared at her for a moment, as the recollection suddenly came back to her. That's why it looked so familiar. The costume was based on an old illustration in one of Twilight's dusty old books, and Rainbow had come across it when looking for something to read back when she was really bored. Don't you ever do that again, Rainbow! Gah, you were turning yourself into an egghead way too fast that way! The cyan pegasus realized that she had been yet again staring at Twilight, without even paying attention. After a moment of complete and utter awkwardness, Rainbow's voice piped up. "I guess it makes sense. You're the element of magic, so of course you'd pick the most powerful unicorn on the record to imitate. Well, at least you got the bells right." Twilight stared in shock at the element of loyalty. Her mouth worked open and closed, but no sounds came out. Rainbow had a very difficult time suppressing the urge to bust out laughing at the sight of the lavender unicorn. Twilight shook her head, and looked her companion square in the eye. "How did you come across that information?" Oh, I don't know Twilight! Maybe it was just the fact that you have like eight books on him sitting around your library, and I was wondering what unicorn magic was. That and I was bored, of course. "I'll never tell! Muahahaha!!" The purple librarian looked up at Rainbow with a look of annoyance. "Fine, be that way. I really don't care." With that, Celestia's prize student turned around, and stormed off, leaving the still inebriated dragon behind. The "Shadowbolt" grew bored with watching the little...green thing sit around, so she decided it was time to find some more people to prank. This only lasted so long, however, before she began to grow tired of performing the same prank repetitively, and most the people saw it coming by that point, anyway. Rainbow decided it was about time to hang with the crowd, so she dispersed her little cloud, and descended into the masses. Everypony was having a blast, so she supposed that she would since she was there anyway. The Mayor was kinda pathetic when it came to telling jokes, but no one ever bothered to tell her this. Not like it really mattered, did it? A few ponies bothered to cheer, and this seemed to delight the eccentric baby-kisser. However, her wig was pretty awesome. Dude, that wig is sweet! So many colors... "Thank you, everypony, and welcome to the Nightmare Night Festival!" At the Mayor's statement, the crowd seemed to chipper up, and cry out in glee. Rainbow rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but join in. After all, this was her type of holiday, wasn't it? "Now all the little ponies who've been out collecting treats should gather together to follow our friend Zecora to hear the legend of...NIGHTMARE MOON!!!! MuhhohohohAhoha!!" Right on queue, Zecora appeared on the sidelines in a puff of green smoke. The whimsical zebra strode confidently out onto the stage, her mane matted down with cobwebs and an eerie air to her as she moved within the gray cape that shrouded her form. She certainly fit the "creepy" part a lot better than Mayor Mare ever could dream of, but the strange zebra did have a knack for that line of work. "Follow me, and very soon, you'll hear the tale of Nightmare Moon!" The crowd of young fillies and colts, as well as a few adults, followed the rhyming zebra away from the stage. Rainbow wasn't surprised to see Pinkie Pie follow, but Twilight? Nah, that's predictable too, in its own way. There was a moment of indecision when the assertive mare had to decide between following a friend or being awesome. She decided that it would be better not to, especially considering that she'd heard the tale about a million times anyway. As the pointless monologue that Mayor Mare wrote droned on, Rainbow Dash began to regret her decision. This is sssooooo un-Rainbow! That's when things actually got interesting. There was a crowd of foals running through the midst of the adults, seemingly unfazed by their parents attempts to stop them and ask what the issue was. This caused a sense of unease among even the adults, since children don't tend to remain panicked around their parents without cause. They had reason to fear. The wind started to pick, and there was an ominous feel to the air around them. The empty skies suddenly filled with clouds, and Rainbow knew only one type of power could do that. Her suspicions were confirmed when a dark, metallic chariot that was led by a pair of "vamponies" hovered over Ponyville, and a heavily cloaked figure descended from the sky. As the figure landed, it threw back its cowl, revealing...Luna? Lightning struck behind the alicorn's head, and her eyes were lit with the burning white light for a split second. Talk about awesome!, Rainbow thought. She knew well enough that the princess was just putting on a, well, really cool show. This, this has just made my day...er, night! Everypony else didn't seem to be nearly so understanding. Rainbow Dash mentally facehooved at the realization that these ponies were actually scared! Why would they be scared of her? It's just the Princess of the Night celebrating her own holiday! Sheesh, lighten up, peoples!! The Princess of the Night strode forward confidently as everypony cowered, and the cloak around her dispersed as she walked towards the nearest ponies. They only proceeded to cower further. "Citizens of Ponyville!" Luna spoke to them, in a voice that was far too loud to fail to intimidate an already frightened village. "We have graced your tiny village with our presence, so that you might behold the real Princess of the Night!" It's weird enough to listen to Zecora rhyming in third person. We really don't need to add another eccentric pony who speaks in the plural while using the Royal Canterlot Voice! "A creature of nightmares no longer, but instead, a pony who desire your love and admiration! Together we shall change this dreadful celebration into a bright and glorious feast!" Okay, she's definitely overdoing it. While she's pulling off the whole "awesome" thing, that was just a little too much... Rainbow Dash realized that the town must be agreeing with her on that matter, since there was the distinct smell of urine and feces being dropped nearby. She had a hard time resisting the urge to laugh at the mere stupidity of the situation. Of course, the princess seemed oblivious to the world around her. Rainbow figured that this mare had the whole speech rehearsed, by the sound of it. "Did you hear that, everypony?! Nightmare Moon said she's going to feast on us all!!" Of course Pinkie Pie decided to make things worse. It did seem to be her calling card. All the ponies around started screaming, and the foals took the crazy pony way too seriously. This, naturally, led to mass panic and hysteria. Pinky and the little foals ran off like hunted little goslings. Meanwhile, the adults looked to scared to move. Luna stared around her in surprise at the way they reacted. "Wat?! No children, no! You no longer have reason to fear us. Screams of delight is what your princess desires! Not screams of terror!!" She smacked a hoof very firmly to the ground, which caused the cobbles to shudder and crack under the force. The only reaction to that last bit was an audible whimper from the general masses. Luna wheeled on the afro-wigged pony, and decided that she was the mayor. "Madam Mayor, thy princess of the night hath arrived!" The Mayor proceeded to shy away from her, very clearly traumatized at just the sight of the mighty Alicorn, daughter of darkness itself. Luna looked somewhat hurt when the mayor ignored her. She turned around, trying to look for just one pony who wasn't frightened of her. They all shied away, and this only perturbed her further. "What is the matter with you?" Um...you're scaring the shit out of these ponies for pretty much no reason... Rainbow Dash looked at the princess, who had already turned away at their rejection. The princess was looking away as if they were just being pieces of trash and that she was the superior entity. It looked somewhat convincing, but the cyan pegasus knew better. It was the same facade that she pulled when she felt hurt and alone. "Very well then. Be that way! We won't even bother with the traditional Royal Farewell!" The crowd watched as the princess left their vicinity, and seemed relieved to be left alive. Rainbow just rolled her eyes. She figured they were just a bunch of idiots, so who cares? "I think I should go talk to her!" The fact that it was Twilight coming up with idea to do so didn't particularly surprise Rainbow Dash. That adorkable librarian had a tendency to not fall for the general stupidity that everypony else seemed to end up falling into, so of course she was the one to keep a level head. "No Twilight, you can't talk to her. She's Nightmare Moon!" Spike had taken a hold of Twilight's cape, and was looking into her eyes with that sense of desperation. He was genuinely scared spit-less for the sake of his companion. Rather touching, if you could ignore the irrelevance of the situation. "No, she's not! I remember watching the elements turn her back to good at the Summer Sun Celebration. It just seems that she's had some trouble adjusting to the new world." The lavender unicorn was about to walk off, but Spike held firmly to the edge of her cape. They stared into each others eyes, having a wordless dialogue with just the looks on their faces. Rainbow sometimes wished that she had somepony that close to her...Oh well, there was no time for that right then. "Don't worry, you guys! I've got this in the bag. I am, after all, like the most awesome pony in Equestria, right? Just let me take care of this." The brash pegasus didn't wait for a reply before dashing off into the woods. She didn't know for sure were the alicorn had gone, but she took a gander to guess that it would be at the statue of Nightmare Moon. It was Nightmare Night, after all. After flying through the trees for a little while, she indeed saw the still form of the princess sitting on the ground in front of the stony statue. Rainbow Dash landed softly behind the blue alicorn, the leaves and grass failing to stir under her feet. She took a look at her surroundings, and realized that they were well into the Everfree Forest. This wasn't particularly threatening, especially with a full-fledged alicorn sitting in front of her, but Rainbow still decided to remain cautious. The time spent around Twilight's library had given her a chance to find out what lurked around the forest, and it had somewhat bashed her sense of security while in the woods. I don't read that much... She knew that it was a lie, but it didn't matter. As long as the light blue mare didn't admit to herself that she had become as much an egghead as Twilight, she was fine. There had been many nights in which she had slithered into the library incognito, and "borrowed" a textbook. It was, in a way, her dark little secret. "Hey, Princess, are you okay?" Luna seemed to start in surprise when she heard the pegasus speak. Apparently she wasn't all powerful, or she'd have heard Rainbow land. The Moon Goddess stood up, and turned around to face Rainbow Dash with a straight face. "Ah, Rainbow Dash. We remember you. Thou wast at the castle in the Everfree forest, one of the people who freed us from...her. For that, we thank thee." The cyan pegasus paused for a moment, her mind reeling as it took in the full effect of the mare in front of her. The princess had changed considerably since the last time that they'd met. Her hair had adopted a similar ethereal form to what her sister had, and she'd grown in leaps and bounds during the few months since they'd last seen each other. In fact, she was kinda...attractive. Rainbow Dash shook that from her head as soon as the thought sprung up. Keep your eye on the finishline, Dash. Eyes on the prize! "You know, last time we met, you looked, well, different." "Ah, we understand what thou'st means. We have resumed our Alicorn duties, and have taken on the form that comes with it. Whether thou'st believe it or not, we appeared like this before the...incident." Rainbow was somewhat taken aback. She had suspected that this princess had merely gained the looks from the powers now bestowed upon her, not that she had already had it. This was a turn of events that even someone like RD couldn't see coming. "Well, Princess, what're you doing here? I don't mean to sound harsh, but no one saw this coming." "We have decided to greet the city that we first visited after being release from bondage. Tonight is probably the best night for this, since it's in our name." "So wait, you weren't trying to just scare them?" "Of course not! We just want to cleanse our reputation. We want people to follow us from love and devotion, not fear and terror!" "Then why did you come unannounced like that? No one was expecting you to come, so they just...balked, you know?" The Alicorn gazed at Rainbow with a curious expression on her face. The latter began to feel just a tad bit uncomfortable after a moment, but the princess replied. "So thou art saying that we scared them from our appearance?" "Well, yeah. They didn't all come see you get freed, so they barely remember that it even happened. Also, you came in a formal appearance unannounced. That usual intimidates people, since they aren't expecting it and don't understand why it wasn't announced." "Do you know a way in which we can avoid startling them without making this official?" "Well duh! Do you talk like this around your sister? I mean the whole "thees" and "thous" and the Royal We in the Royal Canterlot Voice." "Well, no. We use common laymans terms. And how dost thou know about Royal protocol? Art thou a scholar?" "If you didn't expect anypony to know proper etiquette and protocol, then why do you expect them to? Especially when you come unannounced and unofficially! They aren't going to understand what' going on. Why don't you try dropping the formal speech, and save it for when you are addressing large crowds officially? That's what your sister has done, and she gets by just fine." "So you want me to speak like this?" "Exactly!" Rainbow Dash was relieved to get part one out of the way. There was no telling why Luna figured that it would somehow workout between her and the ponies if they couldn't even relate. That's when she got an idea. A rather brilliant idea, to say so herself. "Hey, Luna?" "Yes?" "Um, your looking for a way to make everypony like you, right?" "Well, yes, that was my goal..." "Just follow me, okay?" Tonight's about to get twenty percent cooler... Chapter Two: How to be Awesome, Pt. 1Luna knew that there were few things that had changed with ponies. They had always been afraid of the dark. During the daytime, all things are clear enough for the eye to see, for them to take in every little detail. Ponies could see each other, and were fully capable of assessing who they were dealing with. Since most ponies tended to choose their wording for their audience, they always judged their fellow ponies by their looks. They were usually right. It was for this reason that ponies had hated the night. Darkness comes with the night, and darkness necessitates a certain level of perception that most ponies lacked, and didn't care to obtain. Judgement by appearance was always simpler than by truth, and was "close enough" to become the norm. When these ponies are thrown into the night, however, they loose all sense of who that pony is. The lack of sight leaves them in the unknown, and they fear the unknown. They can't assess a wildcard. Any pony that they see in the dark can be anything, malevolent or benign, vicious or caring, or even just indifferent. That's what truly scares them. How do you face something you cannot analyze, something that requires instinct? Most of the ponies would rather face the Kraken, pulling itself raging from Tartarus itself, than face an unknown entity. It was their greatest strength, it was their truest weakness. Maybe this explained what Luna was feeling inside of her, that stirring in her chest in the company of Rainbow Dash. The blue pegasus was able to see beyond what most ponies saw, and not judge her based only off of her appearance. But maybe there was more to it than that. Rainbow had explained why the ponies feared her. Any pony can understand a villain such as Nightmare Moon, but confronting an unknown such as Luna? There's no way for them to fully comprehend what she was until the princess warmed up to them first. As she followed the cyan mare, still wearing that almost insufferable smirk plastered on her face, the princess of the night realized that she had underestimated that strange little pegasus. On the outside, Dash looked like nothing more than a brash, arrogant young mare who wanted nothing more than to receive the praise of everypony around her. Everyone expected so much from her, and the facade that she wore obviously fit the role. But does it make her happy? Luna could relate, in a way. Being one of two lonely diarchs in a nation where royalty is akin to being a god doesn't help one to recieve real friends, only panderers. And yet, here was a cyan mare leading Luna up towards a cloud house, with no notice or regard to the latter's title or station. It was...oddly appealing. Maybe, just maybe, she might have a friend... Yeah, about the same time that Celestia starts farting out the friendship reports instead of just recieving them the traditional way! Old habits die hard, Lulu. She gasped at the realization of what she had just thought. Celestia...farting scrolls? Luna broke out into giggles at the thought, recieving a curious look from the mare in front of her. By Starswirl's beard, those eyes were beautiful! GAH!!! What am I thinking?! Before Princess Luna had time to think about it, the odd pair had arrived at the floating fortress that Rainbow somehow associated with a...house? This thing was built like the a combination of the Wonderbolts' barracks and a military stockade. The place was huge! Dash seemed to notice the surprised look on Luna's face, and seemed to be somewhat confused for a moment. "What, you don't like it?" "W-well, it's n-not exactly about whether or n-not I l-like it...SWEET CELESTIA'S PASTY WHITE FLANK THAT'S HUGE!!! It took a moment for Luna to register the sound coming from Rainbow's now spasming body. It was probably the most annoying, grating, depraved, adorable sound to musically grace her sensitive ears. "Bua-hahahahahha!!!" There it was, the pinocle of triumph, the symphony of a true music, the most melodious, wonderful, stupendous, awesome sound that the beautiful night had ever heard, putting even the most gorgeous harmonies to shame when compared to the- "Luna, y'kay? "Huh?" "Luna, you're drooling." "What?!" It was true. Slobber was running down the side of her mouth faster than the water from a leaking drain pipe. Even Twilight Sparkle didn't do that, even when exposed to a rare copy of "On The Basic Principles Of Interdimensional Time Travel Using The Basic Harmonics Of The Surrounding Ether, Volume 12" Luna suddenly jerked back in surprise. This was bad. This was so many levels of bad! "Uh, it was, buah?" "Don't worry, I did the same thing when I saw the pricetag on this place!" Thank you, Rainbow, for the save! "Now let's go inside. I've got some things to show you." "Oh, that's amazing, Rainbow!" "Awww, yeah!" "That's the spot! Harder! HHAARRRDDEEERR!!" "I told you you'd enjoy this." "OOHHH!!" The last knot found itself worked out of the princess's back as Rainbow finnished kneading the hell out of it. She sighed and sat down across from Luna, gently nuzzling her way into the cloud she called a sofa. "It's really hard to concentrate when you've got knots the size of apples in your back. Learning how to remove them is the only thing that actually payed off from being dragged to the spa once or twice by Rarity, or even Flutters." "Wow. Could you teach us- teach me how to do that sometime?" "Sure," Rainbow responded, her smile turning into an evil grin. "As long as you practice on me." "That sounds...nice." The fun has been doubled!! "Well, time to move on to our main goal here!" Rainbow said, slowly getting up from her couch. "First of all, we've got to make you seem cute. Not that you aren't already, but in a less intimidating way." "Okay." "You've got to exude confidence! Make them love you with adorableness and just plain sexiness!!" Dash was quickly adopting the "drill sergeant" montra, striking a regal pose. "You can't stand around asking whether or not you're hot! You already know the answer. Just make them believe what you already know! About half of sexiness stems from just believing that you're plain drop dead gorgeous. Now, show me your sexy face!" Luna looked more than a little confused. "My sexy face?" "Well, you want them to love you, right? What's the first thing you hear when you ask what a stallion thinks of Celestia?" Really tall? "I don't know, what?" "Dayum, that mare is sexy! I'd love to lick that marshmallowy white flank!" "Lick that marshmallowy white...Dash!" The cyan pegasus chortled with barely surpressed mirth at that last remark. Rainbow pulled herself together, looking Luna dead in the eye with the most serious deadpan she could muster. "Admit it, she's kinda hot." For some reason, Luna felt something burn inside of her at that last bit. Dash thinks that Celestia's hot? It felt as if some white-hot coal were burning inside of her, making her want to... She remembered this feeling. It was jealousy. Yes, she remembered that feeling quite well. It was that same emotion that had almost destroyed Equestria almost a thousand years ago. But why was it back now? She looked over at her newfound friend, and it didn't take a genius to put it all together. Rainbow was cute, granted. But droolworthy? Nah. Yet there was something about the mare that seemed to stash butterflies into her stomach, like it or not. And in a way, she liked it. She liked it, oh so very much. But...but, she's a mare! "The second part, Luna, is your sense of humor. You've got to loosen up a little!" "Uh, well, what dost thou, er, do you do for humor?" "You think up something to say that makes people want to laugh. It doesn't matter what it is, whether we're talking about a crude yet laughable sex joke or an eggheaded brain fart. As long as it's funny, you've got the cat in the bag." Luna thought about it. Maybe there were some good jokes that she could remember from older times. Well, right then was as good a time to try them out as any, right? "Well, I'm not that good, but I do know one joke..." "Let's hear it!" "Okay. One day a mare, a stallion, and a griffon walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head. The mare pushed her beer away in disgust. The stallion fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The griffon, too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!!" Rainbow stared blankly at her face for a moment, the gears in her brain trying desperately to piece it all together. Instead of figuring it out, she simply figured that the use of the world "bastard" obviously made it funny. The confused look on her face fell off as the "punchline" of the joke finally dawned on her face. "You know, that would have been funnier if I'd caught on immediately. Why don't we try something simpler?" "Like what?" Rainbow smirked at the open opportunity. Time to bring out her best and blow that princess's dark, taught flank back to the moon! Oh, it's on, hot stuff! "Okay, so a mare walks into a bar with her friend, and her friend asks, 'Can I buy you a drink?' The mare politely declines, stating that 'the drink is bad for my legs.' 'Why, do they swell?' the friend inquires. 'No,' the mare responds. 'They spread.'" Luna gasped at the sheer lewdness of that comment. It was horrible, uncouth, uncivilized, dirty, and absolutely hilarious! She started chortling at that, and soon realized that she did in fact enjoy that style of humor. "Teach me more, oh master!" "Alright, so a stallion goes home to find his wife in bed with another..." "Ugh!" Rainbow Dash felt like her head had been taken by a hydra and slammed straight into an oncoming carriage before sitting on it with all twelve tons of its massive, insane bulk, then having it thrown into an over-sized meat grinder for good measure. That, or she had a hangover. The cyan mare tried to open her eyes, but the bright light quickly made her drop that option. Whatever had happened the night before, her mind was shooting blanks trying to remember. The splitting migraine was certainly not helping in that regard. "Kill me now." Her blankets stirred above her at that. Wait, is my blanket alive? She felt around, trying to pull it back up against her side. "Mmf, that's so warm," she commented, glad to feel the heat against her side as she snuggled up into her comforter. That was when it hit her. There was somepony else in bed with her. In bed with her. OH CELESTIA, TELL ME I DIDN'T!! Dash jumped up, frantically looking down at her marehood to be sure. The panic started to subside when she realized that her marehood hadn't been violated the night before. Well, that's a relief. With that crisis averted, Rainbow looked over to see who she'd actually shared her bed with. Her rose colored eyes met a pair of concerned teal colored ones. And with that, everything came rushing back. "Well, at least we didn't go too far." "Rainbow, please remind me to never try drinking ten double shots straight like that again. My head is killing me!" "You and me both, buddy. This calls for a glass of water, about five sandwiches, and a few more glasses of water." "Okay. Rainbow?" "Yeah?" "Did I do...awesome?" "Yeah, I guess you did. I sure as hay couldn't drink that much!" "Well that's good..." Luna trailed off, the awkwardness of the night before settling back in. Did I really get that plastered? she wondered aloud, considering whether or not that was the case. "I know one joint in town that'll give us all of those, and probably for free," Rainbow commented, trotting back over to Luna and helping her up from her rather decrepit state. "But first, we're going to need showers. Not at the same time, of course." Great going, Rainbow. That was a given. "Okay, sounds good to me." "Right this way, Luna." Rainbow walked out of her bedroom, striding down the halls of her labyrinthian home. The cyan pegasus checked over her shoulder to see if Luna was following. Instead, she found the alicorn staring rather intently at her flank. The latter realized that Rainbow had turned to look, and just as quickly averted her gaze, a deep blush flowing across her muzzle. Wait, was she checking my flank out? Dash thought about that for a moment, before doing her usual. Well, duh, stupid! You're the most awesome pegasus in all of Equestria, who *wouldn't** want to stare at your flank? I could probably make good money off of charging admissions to look at it.* Taking that in stride, she summed it up as only natural and left it at that. Not like hers is that bad, either... "No, bad brain!" "What?" "Wasn't talking to you, Princess." "Uh-huh." The two of them finally reached whatever destination was flowing through Rainbow's mind, landing right outside of a building made literally out of...gingerbread? Yeah, it was definitely an edible building. How long have I been gone? Luna had thought that a thousand years would change a lot of things, but making a business out of something she'd want to eat was a little strange. Actually, how has it not decomposed? Or been eaten? I suppose that if even a wooden house could get termites, a house make out of bakery goods that was actually edible to most forms of life would quickly disappear. The answer, of course, was simple: Pinkie Pie. The bustling mare burst right out of her shop to stare Luna dead on into her eyes. "HIYA, PRINCESS!!" The dark alicorn's eyes literally shrunk to pinpricks at that. How was it even possible for her to stretch her neck that far, and oh Celestia, the eyes! "Uh, hi?" Pinkie gasped at that last bit, before inexplicably wrenching the other two mares into her enterprise without any further ado. Luna could literally hear her flank smack right into her seat at a random booth as Pinkie set them down so that she could go get whatever it was she had planned for them to...eat. "Not the cupcakes, oh please, not the cupcakes!" Rainbow muttered, just barely loud enough for Luna to overhear. Apparently the cyan mare was beginning to regret her decision to pull them to this shop for some apparent reason. A very, very apparent reason. "Here you go, silly fillies!" "Uh, Pinkie?" "Yes, Dashie?" "You only serve this dish to ponies that are..." "Why of course, Dashie! Do you think your Auntie Pinkie would forget to give her best friend a free "I Just Found My Special Somepony Cake?!" Rainbow sighed at that. Pinkie could be Pinkie sometimes, but this was getting rather annoying in record time. "Pinks, I don't have a special sompony." "Of course you do, silly! She sitting right next to you!" "Uh, Pinkie? We're just friends." "What? But my Pinkie sense told me that you're more than that, and if my Pinkie Sense told me that it must be true, and if it's true then you're bound to be in love, and if you're not in love that means you're sad, and if you're sad, then I get all mopey wopey, but my Pinkie Sense never lies, and if my Pinkie Sense never lies, *gasp*, then she must inevitably be your special somepony, and if she's your special somepony then I need to throw you a part, and if I need to-" "Pinkie?" "Throw you a party, then I'll need you to at least accept what you already not in your little hearty warty, and if you-" "Pinks." "Don't accept the fact that you're really just lonely and need someone to be there with you when you're all mopey wopey and need somebody to give you a hug and hug you back and make foals with even if it's not possible and-" "PINKIE!!" "Yes, Dashie?" "Um, that's quite enough, we've got to, eh, go?" Pinkie slumped down, obviously looking rather defeated. "Okay, Dashie," she said, turning to go. "But if you ever change your mind about that, then you know where to go to get a great surprise party!" The pink pony suddenly chirped up, literally bouncing off towards her next destination: the kitchen. "Well, that was awkward." Chapter Three: How to be Awesome, Pt.2It's great to be the Prince. Blueblood stared into his overly humongous mirror with a loving gaze. He made sure that his mane remained impeccable, leaving just enough out of place to keep him from coming off as overly pompous. Not that he wasn't, mind you, but if he was to fulfill his life goal of mating with every mare or stallion that was ever born, he'd need to be willing to not come across as overly concerned with his own appearance. After all, only a few percent of all ponies were actually nobility, and he would've been restricted to only that stock had he failed to...diversify. Blueblood chuckled at that. "Hot damn, you're a sexy beast," he muttered to himself. The white unicorn smiled with the smuggest expression imaginable as he put the final lock of his mane into place. "If only you weren't, well, me. I can only imagine what our babies would look like. After all, my superior blood should be spread around indiscriminately, shouldn't it?" "Bluey, dear, can you help me get up?" And here comes the fun part. "What, and soil my perfect manicure? My hooves should not be tainted by your common filth, Peasant!" Blueblood barely managed to suppress his sadistic mirth as he heard the mare laying in his quadruple King sized bed gasp in shock. Oh, how he loved to lead those mares on. While stallions could become just as heartbroken, they were usually a little different in their manner of sorrow, and as much as Blueblood enjoyed getting yelled at by some common idiot, he was always more excited by the heartbreak of a mare who had just been given her entire life's dream only to have it thrown back in her face. The best part was that there was no moral ambiguity in doing so. Even Celestia herself permitted it, as all his actions were doing was to disillusion the rather stupid and facile subjects that she had worked so hard to indoctrinate with goodwill. Better they learn after a one night stand than on the battlefield, right? "Of course I'm right!" Blueblood cried out excitedly as he looked into the mirror. "I'm always right, just like Auntie Tia says!" The gentle sobs of a kind and shattered mare drifted from his stained bedsheets, and the wicked stallion barely managed to suppress his strong urge to laugh as he made himself wipe away that arrogant smile. He thought for a moment about what his father had told him when he was but a young colt, about the disappointment that that horrid stallion had shown him before dying, and he managed to well up some tears for his next little adventure. "I'm sorry, Dearest. I thought that my joke would be funny, but I was just being dumb," Blueblood iterated, pulling the crying lump in his blankets into a warm, meaningful embrace. "Sh, sh, there there. It's okay, I would never hurt you. I love you far too much for that." Yeah right!! "Do you mean that?" the gray mare responded, looking up into his eyes with the most hopeful expression she had ever donned. Her magenta eyes met his kind, loving smile with what must have inevitably been a growing love and happiness. "W-will you stay with me?" "No," Blueblood replied, keeping that same self-indulgent little smirk that he'd been masking as kindness for the last couple of minutes. "I meant every word I said before. You're a worthless piece of trash, and you're horrible in bed. I've had my satisfaction, so get out." "W-what?" "I said 'get out.' Can't you take an order?" Blueblood's smile dropped to an annoyed scowl. "Pick up your things and get your filthy little carcass out of my room before I have you fed to my pet dragon." "B-but-" "But what? Did you honestly think that a pathetic, sorry excuse of a mare like yourself could actually get anywhere in life? Did you really think that somepony as amazing and utterly gorgeous as my princely self could possibly see anything in you other than as a sex toy? You're trash, and that's all you have ever been. Now get out of my sight before I vomit." The gray mare's expression broke, seeming to grow more and more downtrodden with every passing moment. A pair of tears started to trickle down her face as she stood up and started to trot towards the door, picking up the cello case after promptly closing it. Oh, how this was delicious! While Blueblood would love to say that she was utterly beautiful, for that's what she really was, he simply could not pass up the opportunity to utterly wreck the life of such a kind and caring mare. "Oh, and Vitavia? You are the worse cellist I have ever met. Why did you even bother picking that instrument up?" Blueblood knew that her actual name was Octavia, but if he had said it correctly, it would have given her some modicum of validity to her existence. While her name, her music, her demeanor, and her lustrous black mane all made the package utterly splendid, it would simply be out of his nature for Blueblood to voice such praise aloud to anypony. He put on a sadistic grin as Octavia stopped at the door. The gray mare seemed frozen in place for a moment, before setting her case on the ground. She turned to face Blueblood with the coldest look he had ever seen. He barely managed not to piss himself. The prince had elicited many different reactions over his years as a Prince of Equestria, but he'd never seen one so bitterly neutral. Some had screamed, others had cried, and a few had even gone to the whipping post for striking him, but none had ever reacted as such. "Perhaps you find this amusing, Blueblood. Perhaps you think that you are somehow untouchable, something that is above and beyond anypony else simply because you were born. You're not. Every day that you eat another bite of food, a bite that must be taken to keep you alive just like anypony else, is another day in which you will shit your feces all over yet another stall as you excrete what has been consumed. Do you know what? Your dung still reeks, and not of roses. Unfortunately, the truth is that your excrement is hardly what reeks the most about you." Octavia drew nearer, that same frozen, impassive look glued to her face. Her eyes seemed to eat everything that Blueblood was. He had been scared before, sure, but this was new. He wasn't scare; we was downright terrified. She drew herself up to him, stopping her muzzle mere inches from his own. "You smell of your rotten soul, left putrid and alone as you try and mask your loneliness in a twisted form of humor, finding solace in the misery of those around you. You have been given every opportunity to become anything that you could ever have wanted to be, and yet you chose the most pathetic form imaginable to represent yourself. I know what you've done, and now I've seen it for myself, but that still doesn't answer the question that now plagues me: Why? Why did you forget yourself like this? You had everything handed to you from the very beginning, and yet you've done nothing but throw it all away." No, not this... "You could have made me proud, Blue! Anypony could have been glad to have known you, ready to follow and seeking the leadership of a stallion who in truth is intelligent enough to do so. You didn't have to command, you could have inspired!" Oh God, please no!! Blueblood tried to hide it from himself, but a small trail of tears was now falling down his face, barely suppressed sobs starting to choke up in his throat. He tried to distract himself, but the beautiful mare in front of him kept him rooted in his place, frozen to her mesmerizing eyes. "You disappoint me, Blueblood. You could have been so much, you could have been great! Instead, you are nothing but a shadow of yourself, a faint image on the wall, highlighted only by the lack of your own true form. When I look at you, my Prince, I feel nothing but sorrow. You will never be that stallion you could have been, and you look like you never will change. I hope you have a great life, blissfully enjoying every moment of torment you inflict on others to relieve yourself of this reality. As for myself, you are dead to me." Octavia turned and trotted out the door, stopping only long enough to pick up the instrument that she had long used to express her very soul. They gray mare didn't even bother to look over her shoulder. Blueblood stood riveted in place, trying to grasp what had just transpired. He felt horrible inside, that bitter feeling that he had hidden from himself every day since his father's death, and he dragged himself over to his mirror. The white unicorn looked around his room, taking in every detail of every piece of furniture, of every one of his numerous portraits of none other than himself, and he wept. Blueblood wept for every mare and stallion he had wronged, for every time he had torn someone apart for his own amusement. He wept for all the potential he had left behind in favor of his own self-gratification, for every time he ranted to nopony in particular just for the sake of his own verbal masturbation, enjoying every nuance of his own speech. The young stallion wept for what he had become in favor of what he should have been. But above all else, he wept for the father he had failed. The young prince wept inconsolably for hours, denying his numerous concerned servants from entering his room, his only domain. Servants who cared for him because it was their job, not because they felt any modicum of love or respect for him outside of his undeserved power. He had thrown away everything dear to him for the sake of hiding his emotions, and he knew it. He wanted to be loved, to be cared for, but had acted brashly many a time to hide his own fear of it. This wasn't the first time that the prince had wept, nor would it be the last, but he resorted to what he always did: narcissism. Blueblood stared at the mirror long and hard, idly convincing himself that it was all Octavia's fault and none of his own, that he was a good pony and that they were the ones at fault. He started to smile a bit when he thought about how great he really was. Yes, he was the prince for Celestia's sake! Soon, the young stallion stoop up, wiping away his tears as he trotted out from his room. He listened to the concerned questions of his 'mindless' minions as they asked many a question with faux concern, and he convinced himself that their concern was indeed a valid one. After all, who could help but love such an incredibly gorgeous stallion? "Luna, what are you doing?" Rainbow asked, an amused look on her face. She stared in awe as the Night Goddess wolfed down her fourteenth pastry. "You've already won, for Celestia's sake!" "Mpff nom!" Luna tried to reply as she finished chewing, reaching idly for yet another morsel to shove down her own throat. As soon as the last one was gone, Luna tried to hork another down, but was stopped by Rainbow's hoof. "As much as I enjoy watching you eat those, aren't you sure that's not a little...unhealthy?" Rainbow asked, trying not to laugh insanely at her newfound friend. "Wait...can alicorns even get fat?" "Nope!" Luna replied cheerfully, before stuffing another one into her already bulging mouth. "Celestia eaphs these all thef timeph!" Rainbow couldn't help it anymore. The cyan mare fell to the ground, laughing uproariously at the princess's antics. Luna looked down at her with a truly confused expression. "Whatsph tho funny?" "Your face!" "Dost thou imply that we-I am ridiculous or something?" "Only when you're eating a stack of Pinkie's donuts faster than she can!" The pink mare had given them a 'small' batch of the pastries when they were leaving, and it was supposed to last a few days even at Rainbow's insane rate. Naturally, they decided to compete to see who could hork down the most on the way back to Rianbow's house. There was no real contest there, with the light blue mare barely finishing six as it was. "You know, Luna, you look pretty cute when you're scarfing those." That's when the dark alicorn started to choke on her baked goods. Rainbow continued to laugh for a moment, before realizing that it wasn't a ploy. "Ohmygosh, are you alright?!" When Luna fell over, trying to breath some non-existent air, Rainbow started to panic. She started to look around for her best failsafe, but Twilight was nowhere around. It was just her and the princess, and that meant that she was the only one who could do something about it. Even in her panic stricken mind, Rainbow Dash could still remember reading one of Twilight's books on CPR and the Heimlich Maneuver after Daring Do had used it a while back. Something about a Diamond Dog and choking...She reached her hooves around the alicorn, pulling that mare's back up against her midriff as she started to pull in at the base of her ribcage. It took several tries, and yet there was still no getting the lodged morsel out of Luna's esophagus. "C'mon, think, Rainbow, think!" She racked her brains for a few more seconds before realizing that her forehooves were slightly misplaced. The memory of the book's diagrams came back to mind, and she imitated them as best she could. Time was of the essence. Rainbow wrapped her hooves around her friend's midriff again, but this time she placed her hooves in a slightly better position, before knocking the food out on the third heave. That's when she noticed that Luna was no longer breathing. "Oh Celestia damnit no!" Rainbow reached down and flipped Luna over, trying to lay her gently down on her back. The Princess of the Night was not breathing, and with closer inspection, Rainbow found that there was no pulse as well. "No, no, NO!! DON'T DIE ON ME LUNA!!" Rainbow looked around, tears streaming her face as she tried to see if anypony was around to help her out. They were outside of Ponyville and well beyond earshot of anypony. Why'd I have to move so damn far out?! Rainbow's panicked look subsided as she realized that it was up to her and her alone to save her friend. She looked down at her friend's face, and she decided right then not to give up, not until she was sure that there was no way to save that splendid mare. Maybe the two hadn't known each other that long, but there was no way in hell that Rainbow would leave her like this. "Let's think...Medical Resuscitation, Volume One mentioned the basics in how to-" Dash stopped talking aloud, instead trying to get her friend's heart beating again. Placing her hooves in position, the cyan mare started thrusting vigorously, knowing that even if she broke Luna's ribs, it would be better than to do so too weakly and let her die. The first sentence in the book had said something that was drilled into the mind of every pony that ever read it: if they're already dead, don't be afraid to kill them. Dead is dead, and so all you're doing is trying to bring them back. Don't be afraid to do what you have to. Rainbow remembered that, and she employed it right then without a moment's hesitation. She put her mouth up against Luna's, drawing out the used air to replace it with her own fresh air before going back to trying to start the heart again. She kept at it, wishing oh so fervently for a defibrillator right about then. Luna drifted in the void, feeling nothing save the strange sensation of disembodiment. She knew this feeling, it was the feeling that she felt every day that she moved the moon in its place. How she had ended up in some strange void, though, was a mystery to her. Where am I? She tried to look around, but there was nothing there anyways, and no body through which to move within anyways. It took a moment for the last moments of her life to start coming back, but Luna started to realize what had just happened. Am I...dead? "Yes, Daughter." Mom?! A light started to form itself in front of the young alicorn, shaping itself into the image of another alicorn. The figure was quite tall and regal, looking much like a more noble version of Celestia. The mane was of a reddish hue, and sat still and tangible down to her shoulders. "Yes, Dear, it's me." Mom!! "Hush now, we don't have much time." What are you talking about? Rainbow could barely feel the tears that were streaming uncontrollably down her face as she tried time after time to get her friend's heart moving again. While the cells weren't completely dead yet, it was starting to approach the allotted time when the brain would actually start to suffer... The cyan mare pushed her lips up against Luna's yet again, forcing more oxygen into her system despite the fact that the blood wasn't really flowing. She wanted to be sure that there was something in there if, no when the heart started again. "C'mon, Luna..." Rainbow muttered, her voice cracking as she continued to pound on Luna's chest, trying desperately to start a still unbeating heart. "Daughter, you are dead, it is true, but you still have time yet to live, time in which you are supposed to live. And Luna?" Yes, Mother? "Be sure to thank Rainbow Dash for me, will you?" Okay. "Well, I must be going. Don't worry, you can see me again in a- No spoilers, my child." With that, the image of the white alicorn started to fade, her kind smile disappearing with the rest of her. Luna was soon surrounded by darkness yet again. Suddenly, she felt a pain in her chest that shouldn't have been there. Rainbow felt the start of a heartbeat, and she could hardly contain herself. Without hesitating, she continued to try reviving her friend, suddenly filled with hope. Her prayers were being answered. Thank you, Celestia. Luna started to feel herself being tugged into a body that felt cold and unalive to her, but she could at the same time feel its heart beginning to stir once more. Without hesitating, she dove into the still body, trying herself to get its heart beating again through sheer will. "YES!!" Rainbow hollered as she felt Luna's heart starting to beat more regularly, and she dove down and planted a firm kiss on the alicorn's lips. It was a true kiss, not another attempt at resuscitation, and she felt her tongue slipping into Luna's mouth. What's more, she could start to feel the dark princess's own returning the favor. After another moment, Rainbow pulled back, meeting the teal eyes of that wonderful, gorgeous mare she had just barely managed to save. "What did I miss?" Luna asked, still a little dazed from the excursion. Rainbow just laughed, before pulling the alicorn into a deep, heartfelt hug. She cried into her dear friend's mane, but her tears were ones of joy rather than sorrow. For the rest of her life, Rainbow would always point to that moment as the happiest of her life. "Oh, I'll tell you later. But for now, we have got to get you to a hospital." They laughed together, before the young pegasus picked up Luna, slinging her over her shoulder to carry back to the Ponyville Proper and the awaiting medical attention. Neither of them noticed that the sun was rising as the moon set regardless of Luna's lack of influence.
Prologue: Before the Night"I'm going out, Celly!!" Luna practically screamed. She'd been running around the castle all day, waiting for nighttime to approach so that she could travel to Ponyville. Celestia sighed warily. Ever since Luna learned about Nightmare Night, she'd been obsessed with it! And even worse, she couldn't be convinced to do anything but the most stupid way of greeting them! Calm down, Celly. She's just come back, and still has to adjust. Just let her be. What's the worst that could happen? I don't know, how about public lynching?! They still haven't forgotten about Nightmare Moon, and she's still going to go out and shout at them in a bat-cloak!! First of all, it's not shouting. It's just the Royal Canterlot voice! Also, they're *all** wearing something like the bat-cloak. She'd stick out if she wasn't wearing something similar.* Celestia realized that she was back into her inner-monologuing. She'd been doing that since about, oh, say two hundred years after the rebellion. It grew just a little lonely, being the only immortal around. Just...keep it calm. You can't hardly stop her anyway... Celestia was broken from her internal ramblings when her little sister ran straight into the nearest dresser, the dark blue mare looking around ashamedly when one of Celestia’s priceless vases fell to the ground and shattered. The older princess gave Luna a somewhat annoyed look. “Uh…oops?” Celestia sighed for the billionth time that night. “Look, Luna, I know this night must probably seem pretty special to you, especially since it didn’t exist while you were still caught up on the moon, but just try and pay attention.” The princess of the night stared fixedly at her older counterpart. Celestia couldn’t help but hesitate, not wanting to hurt her younger sibling’s feelings too badly. “Um…I understand that you want to be appreciated by the ponies around you, but you have to keep a straight head on your shoulders. Going around traipsing as Nightmare Moon isn’t going to make people like you. There hasn’t been enough time since her last appearance for such a show of power to not intimidate them. Ponies just aren’t like they used to be…” The Sun Goddess mentally face-hooved at her lack of skills when it came to dealing with her sister. They'd never been very good at communicating, even though both of them had the best of intentions. Their words always seemed garbled and confused, and at times they took offense for things neither of them meant to say. The Nightmare Moon incident didn't help these matters. Great, yet another faux pa with your younger sister. Congratulations, you've managed to hurt her forth the bazillionth time in your pathetic life! Just shut up, Celly. I don't need this on top of everything... Luna looked somewhat crestfallen. “I know what you mean, sis, but I’ve got to give this a try! I…I don’t have any friends anymore. Everyone…everypony I ever knew… are gone. I can’t bring them back, and if there’s an afterlife, it doesn’t matter. I’m immortal, and I’m never going to see them again!” Wonderful, not only did you manage to hurt her feelings, but added the low blow of immortality to it. Score: Stupidity, 1, Celly, 0. Just try not to be such a dingus. By now there were tears flowing from Luna’s eyes, but she suppressed the urge to dash away from her sister. “I know that anyone I befriend here is just going to die anyway. There’s no saving them from Death. There will come a time, their time, for them to follow him into the Nether. After that, there will be no more “hellos”, or “goodbyes”. All there will be are my memories, like there are now.” Celestia was probably the only pony alive who truly understood what Luna was saying, and it cut her deeply. She didn’t want her little sister to be in such pain, but was there really a way to avoid it? The elder princess started to feel her own tears forming in her eyes when she thought about all of her friends, of the time that she truly loved…The white alicorn quickly cut of the urge to cry. She was the Sun Goddess, and couldn't afford to commit to such weakness. Are you about to cry, Celly? Don't you dare!! How can I help it? She's just as alone as I am. And now she understands what I can hardly bear... Celestia looked deeply into her sister's eyes, which met her gaze evenly. There were tears there, but also a fair amount of confidence and maturity that wasn't there before. Luna spoke up again. “But just because they are dead and gone doesn’t mean I can’t have friends! Eternity will only be bearable with others around you, people you can support, encourage, to…love. Yes, I don’t just want to be alone. I...I can't be alone! I’ll take my chances with these ponies. They need me, just as I need them.” The alabaster princess was startled at the depth of Luna’s little speech. Was this proud, grown mare that little filly she had once doted on after their parents died? No, she was standing far to tall and proud to be that foal anymore. Maybe she had begun to underestimate her… “Luna…it will only bring more heartache when the time comes for them to die. It will only be the same thing, over and over and over. I should know, I’ve spent the last thousand years trying it, over and over and over. It doesn’t end, nor does the sorrow. This…immortality, it isn’t a privilege! We will have to suffer, and for the sake of those we don’t even know.” The look on the midnight alicorn rent Celestia’s heart. She turned away from her little sister, mulling over the possibilities. Finally, she just gave up. There was really only one way for this to be settled. With yet another heartfelt sigh, Celli turned to look into Luna’s heart-broken eyes. “Fine, have your wish. But be aware that I have warned you of the consequences. If you start down this path, there’s no coming back! Only misery will follow, and I have no desire to see you in any more pain than you already are in. I've been down that road, even found a stallion I loved. I still miss him, so much! But I know that he's not coming back, and all I have left are those few sweet moments we had together, the times when it was just us. I...try to be careful. And good luck.” Celestia watched lovingly as her little sister brightened up. She wasn’t particularly surprised when Luna jumped up and threw her in the tightest embrace she had felt in years. “Oh thank you, thank you sis! I won’t let you down! I just…I gotta go!!” With that, the moon princess blazed out the room as if she had rocket boosters strapped to her instead of wings. Celestia stared after where she had just been a moment earlier, before turning around to stride towards the simple but elegant bed. After slumping down, she turned to look at her doorway. “I wish you the best of luck, my little sister.”
Chapter One: Nightmare NightLuna practically sprinted down the marble halls of Canterlot Castle as she ran toward the loading bay. The servants watched, somewhat confused as to why a normally more refined princess would bound around like some young filly. They would then turn away, absorbed back into their work for the day. The ponies that worked in the ancient halls of Canterlot had no reason to pay more than a little heed to someone who they didn't, and had no likelihood of ever understanding. As she sped down the dark corridors, lit only by the last twinklings of the setting sun, she prepared her magic to call upon the night itself, to rend the moon from its celestial resting place. The light of the day faded into the eternal darkness that she had grown to love, as only a mother can love her foal. There was something about raising it that made Luna feel content, even in the worst of times. The time in which she had spent entombed on its surface only strengthened that bond. The moon sceamed as it was torn from its only real home, sent with shivers into a world it never wished to visit. But Luna persisted, understanding the feeling, the same feeling she had felt as she was torn from her own mother's womb to be thrown into a dark world that only wished to cause her pain. She was still trepidatious about whether or not this world would ever forgive her. But she knew that she had to at least give it a try. I *will** do this, for both them and myself. I won't be brought to my knees again!* She stared longingly up at her moon. How simple it was, for the moon. The very existence of the bright orb, now obstructed by the location of her neighbor, partially between her and the sun, and ever so alone. And yet, the massive entity had little to worry about. It wasn't involved with the ponies on the surface of its sister. It was alone, simple and bittersweet. The Princess of the Night abandoned her musings as she approached the docking bay on the side of the cliff. This design had been truly hers, and hers alone. As far as she was concerned, the air was to a Pegasus (or Alicorn) as the sea was to anypony else. That inspired the concept of placing chariots in the air itself, and she had grown to love it. "Hail Luna!" one of her Night Guards said in a somewhat scripted manner. "Hello, Brutus. Is everything prepared for the journey?" Luna asked, following the standard protocol. "Yes, your highness. Everything is set, and both Blackwing and Noctus are dressed, fitted, and ready upon your command." "Noctus? I haven't seen him around in a while. Has your brother been busy of late?" "You hadn't heard? His first foal was born a few weeks ago. A bright young filly! Now I'm an uncle, and I couldn't be happier." Great going, Luna! Not even bothering to pay attention to your own *guards*?! This is really unacceptable. Luna looked evenly at Brutus, and simply said a quiet but firm "Congratulations", and left it at that. She trotted over to the Night Chariot that she had constructed for her back in the last era, before the whole Nightmare Moon scandal... After donning her cloak, the blue alicorn mounted the chariot, and waited for the pair of winged stallions to take their positions. Moments later, the great steel doors that held the bay shut to the world outside opened, revealing the princess's beautiful night for all the slender and brilliance that it really was. She sighed in contentment as her eyes scanned the cold, yet gorgeous sight which she had just created only a few minutes earlier. The chariot took off, flying with nearly impossible speeds. Luna let the her hair blow around in the night, feeling the wind blow through its presently ethereal form. It still felt marvelous despite being in a state of unreality, and she was enjoying every minute of it. Rainbow Dash had always loved pranks. The kind of brash but amusing humor it gave her had always had its own niche in the darker side of her heart. It was the only reason the cyan mare even bothered to actually befriend Pinkie Pie, and had been what originally got the friendship between her and Gilda started back at flight school. Tonight, the rainbow-maned pegasus decided to play dress up. It was really the only time that she bothered doing so, except when Rarity made her. She still remembered Nightmare Moon's little trick on her with the Shadowbolts, and decided that it would be the most fitting costume on a night celebrating the old hag. It was also a great night for pranks. "Hey Raindrops, you decided to go all Viking on us tonight? I'd never have guessed." Rainbow snickered from the little black raincloud she had made that morning. Thunderlane had always been somewhat of an ass, and now was the best time to make him bray like one! ZZZZZAAAPPPP!!!!!! "I SURRENDER!" the dark coated pegasus shouted, before shooting off into the air, silver mane almost ripped from his skull at the velocity. Rainbow nearly died laughing, and had to rush off with the cloud while Raindrops screamed a very distinct "Rainbow!!" along with a few other words that would make even the most raunchy sailor sweat. Rainbow left her in the dust, despite pushing a cloud that was laden with moisture and static charge. That was...AWESOME!! Let's see who else we can startle... The somewhat brash pegasus wandered around the village, surprising every pony who had not yet been exposed with a sizable charge of electric energy, the bluish bolts barely missing them. It was inevitable that she would eventually come across Twilight, with Spike in tow, of course! There was a very pink mare dressed in a chicken suit eating candy at the rate of a garbage disposal, and they were watching with great interest. One guess who that is. My turn to startle Pinkie! Rainbow hit the cloud with her perfected technique, aiming the bolt just shy of Pinkie's flank. The way that the cotton-candy mare jumped in surprise was priceless. Also, the distinct "bakah!" that followed was making Rainbow's sides hurt with unbridled mirth. "Rainbow Dash! That wasn't very nice!" "Oh, lighten up, old timer! This is the best night of the year for pranks!" "But look what you did to Spike!!" Yeah, yeah, yeah, so he's broken. Who cares? "Aww, its all in good fun!" Rainbow Dash paused for a moment to take in Twilight's appearance. The look seemed to ring some bell in the back of the sky blue mare, but she couldn't quite place it. After a few moments, Twilight noticed the was that her friend was staring at her. "Um, Rainbow Dash?" "Yeah?" "Why are you staring at me?" "I was? Oh, yeah, I was. Uh...the costume is kinda...familiar. What's it supposed to be, egghead?" "Starswirl the Bearded, of course!" Rainbow stared at her for a moment, as the recollection suddenly came back to her. That's why it looked so familiar. The costume was based on an old illustration in one of Twilight's dusty old books, and Rainbow had come across it when looking for something to read back when she was really bored. Don't you ever do that again, Rainbow! Gah, you were turning yourself into an egghead way too fast that way! The cyan pegasus realized that she had been yet again staring at Twilight, without even paying attention. After a moment of complete and utter awkwardness, Rainbow's voice piped up. "I guess it makes sense. You're the element of magic, so of course you'd pick the most powerful unicorn on the record to imitate. Well, at least you got the bells right." Twilight stared in shock at the element of loyalty. Her mouth worked open and closed, but no sounds came out. Rainbow had a very difficult time suppressing the urge to bust out laughing at the sight of the lavender unicorn. Twilight shook her head, and looked her companion square in the eye. "How did you come across that information?" Oh, I don't know Twilight! Maybe it was just the fact that you have like eight books on him sitting around your library, and I was wondering what unicorn magic was. That and I was bored, of course. "I'll never tell! Muahahaha!!" The purple librarian looked up at Rainbow with a look of annoyance. "Fine, be that way. I really don't care." With that, Celestia's prize student turned around, and stormed off, leaving the still inebriated dragon behind. The "Shadowbolt" grew bored with watching the little...green thing sit around, so she decided it was time to find some more people to prank. This only lasted so long, however, before she began to grow tired of performing the same prank repetitively, and most the people saw it coming by that point, anyway. Rainbow decided it was about time to hang with the crowd, so she dispersed her little cloud, and descended into the masses. Everypony was having a blast, so she supposed that she would since she was there anyway. The Mayor was kinda pathetic when it came to telling jokes, but no one ever bothered to tell her this. Not like it really mattered, did it? A few ponies bothered to cheer, and this seemed to delight the eccentric baby-kisser. However, her wig was pretty awesome. Dude, that wig is sweet! So many colors... "Thank you, everypony, and welcome to the Nightmare Night Festival!" At the Mayor's statement, the crowd seemed to chipper up, and cry out in glee. Rainbow rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but join in. After all, this was her type of holiday, wasn't it? "Now all the little ponies who've been out collecting treats should gather together to follow our friend Zecora to hear the legend of...NIGHTMARE MOON!!!! MuhhohohohAhoha!!" Right on queue, Zecora appeared on the sidelines in a puff of green smoke. The whimsical zebra strode confidently out onto the stage, her mane matted down with cobwebs and an eerie air to her as she moved within the gray cape that shrouded her form. She certainly fit the "creepy" part a lot better than Mayor Mare ever could dream of, but the strange zebra did have a knack for that line of work. "Follow me, and very soon, you'll hear the tale of Nightmare Moon!" The crowd of young fillies and colts, as well as a few adults, followed the rhyming zebra away from the stage. Rainbow wasn't surprised to see Pinkie Pie follow, but Twilight? Nah, that's predictable too, in its own way. There was a moment of indecision when the assertive mare had to decide between following a friend or being awesome. She decided that it would be better not to, especially considering that she'd heard the tale about a million times anyway. As the pointless monologue that Mayor Mare wrote droned on, Rainbow Dash began to regret her decision. This is sssooooo un-Rainbow! That's when things actually got interesting. There was a crowd of foals running through the midst of the adults, seemingly unfazed by their parents attempts to stop them and ask what the issue was. This caused a sense of unease among even the adults, since children don't tend to remain panicked around their parents without cause. They had reason to fear. The wind started to pick, and there was an ominous feel to the air around them. The empty skies suddenly filled with clouds, and Rainbow knew only one type of power could do that. Her suspicions were confirmed when a dark, metallic chariot that was led by a pair of "vamponies" hovered over Ponyville, and a heavily cloaked figure descended from the sky. As the figure landed, it threw back its cowl, revealing...Luna? Lightning struck behind the alicorn's head, and her eyes were lit with the burning white light for a split second. Talk about awesome!, Rainbow thought. She knew well enough that the princess was just putting on a, well, really cool show. This, this has just made my day...er, night! Everypony else didn't seem to be nearly so understanding. Rainbow Dash mentally facehooved at the realization that these ponies were actually scared! Why would they be scared of her? It's just the Princess of the Night celebrating her own holiday! Sheesh, lighten up, peoples!! The Princess of the Night strode forward confidently as everypony cowered, and the cloak around her dispersed as she walked towards the nearest ponies. They only proceeded to cower further. "Citizens of Ponyville!" Luna spoke to them, in a voice that was far too loud to fail to intimidate an already frightened village. "We have graced your tiny village with our presence, so that you might behold the real Princess of the Night!" It's weird enough to listen to Zecora rhyming in third person. We really don't need to add another eccentric pony who speaks in the plural while using the Royal Canterlot Voice! "A creature of nightmares no longer, but instead, a pony who desire your love and admiration! Together we shall change this dreadful celebration into a bright and glorious feast!" Okay, she's definitely overdoing it. While she's pulling off the whole "awesome" thing, that was just a little too much... Rainbow Dash realized that the town must be agreeing with her on that matter, since there was the distinct smell of urine and feces being dropped nearby. She had a hard time resisting the urge to laugh at the mere stupidity of the situation. Of course, the princess seemed oblivious to the world around her. Rainbow figured that this mare had the whole speech rehearsed, by the sound of it. "Did you hear that, everypony?! Nightmare Moon said she's going to feast on us all!!" Of course Pinkie Pie decided to make things worse. It did seem to be her calling card. All the ponies around started screaming, and the foals took the crazy pony way too seriously. This, naturally, led to mass panic and hysteria. Pinky and the little foals ran off like hunted little goslings. Meanwhile, the adults looked to scared to move. Luna stared around her in surprise at the way they reacted. "Wat?! No children, no! You no longer have reason to fear us. Screams of delight is what your princess desires! Not screams of terror!!" She smacked a hoof very firmly to the ground, which caused the cobbles to shudder and crack under the force. The only reaction to that last bit was an audible whimper from the general masses. Luna wheeled on the afro-wigged pony, and decided that she was the mayor. "Madam Mayor, thy princess of the night hath arrived!" The Mayor proceeded to shy away from her, very clearly traumatized at just the sight of the mighty Alicorn, daughter of darkness itself. Luna looked somewhat hurt when the mayor ignored her. She turned around, trying to look for just one pony who wasn't frightened of her. They all shied away, and this only perturbed her further. "What is the matter with you?" Um...you're scaring the shit out of these ponies for pretty much no reason... Rainbow Dash looked at the princess, who had already turned away at their rejection. The princess was looking away as if they were just being pieces of trash and that she was the superior entity. It looked somewhat convincing, but the cyan pegasus knew better. It was the same facade that she pulled when she felt hurt and alone. "Very well then. Be that way! We won't even bother with the traditional Royal Farewell!" The crowd watched as the princess left their vicinity, and seemed relieved to be left alive. Rainbow just rolled her eyes. She figured they were just a bunch of idiots, so who cares? "I think I should go talk to her!" The fact that it was Twilight coming up with idea to do so didn't particularly surprise Rainbow Dash. That adorkable librarian had a tendency to not fall for the general stupidity that everypony else seemed to end up falling into, so of course she was the one to keep a level head. "No Twilight, you can't talk to her. She's Nightmare Moon!" Spike had taken a hold of Twilight's cape, and was looking into her eyes with that sense of desperation. He was genuinely scared spit-less for the sake of his companion. Rather touching, if you could ignore the irrelevance of the situation. "No, she's not! I remember watching the elements turn her back to good at the Summer Sun Celebration. It just seems that she's had some trouble adjusting to the new world." The lavender unicorn was about to walk off, but Spike held firmly to the edge of her cape. They stared into each others eyes, having a wordless dialogue with just the looks on their faces. Rainbow sometimes wished that she had somepony that close to her...Oh well, there was no time for that right then. "Don't worry, you guys! I've got this in the bag. I am, after all, like the most awesome pony in Equestria, right? Just let me take care of this." The brash pegasus didn't wait for a reply before dashing off into the woods. She didn't know for sure were the alicorn had gone, but she took a gander to guess that it would be at the statue of Nightmare Moon. It was Nightmare Night, after all. After flying through the trees for a little while, she indeed saw the still form of the princess sitting on the ground in front of the stony statue. Rainbow Dash landed softly behind the blue alicorn, the leaves and grass failing to stir under her feet. She took a look at her surroundings, and realized that they were well into the Everfree Forest. This wasn't particularly threatening, especially with a full-fledged alicorn sitting in front of her, but Rainbow still decided to remain cautious. The time spent around Twilight's library had given her a chance to find out what lurked around the forest, and it had somewhat bashed her sense of security while in the woods. I don't read that much... She knew that it was a lie, but it didn't matter. As long as the light blue mare didn't admit to herself that she had become as much an egghead as Twilight, she was fine. There had been many nights in which she had slithered into the library incognito, and "borrowed" a textbook. It was, in a way, her dark little secret. "Hey, Princess, are you okay?" Luna seemed to start in surprise when she heard the pegasus speak. Apparently she wasn't all powerful, or she'd have heard Rainbow land. The Moon Goddess stood up, and turned around to face Rainbow Dash with a straight face. "Ah, Rainbow Dash. We remember you. Thou wast at the castle in the Everfree forest, one of the people who freed us from...her. For that, we thank thee." The cyan pegasus paused for a moment, her mind reeling as it took in the full effect of the mare in front of her. The princess had changed considerably since the last time that they'd met. Her hair had adopted a similar ethereal form to what her sister had, and she'd grown in leaps and bounds during the few months since they'd last seen each other. In fact, she was kinda...attractive. Rainbow Dash shook that from her head as soon as the thought sprung up. Keep your eye on the finishline, Dash. Eyes on the prize! "You know, last time we met, you looked, well, different." "Ah, we understand what thou'st means. We have resumed our Alicorn duties, and have taken on the form that comes with it. Whether thou'st believe it or not, we appeared like this before the...incident." Rainbow was somewhat taken aback. She had suspected that this princess had merely gained the looks from the powers now bestowed upon her, not that she had already had it. This was a turn of events that even someone like RD couldn't see coming. "Well, Princess, what're you doing here? I don't mean to sound harsh, but no one saw this coming." "We have decided to greet the city that we first visited after being release from bondage. Tonight is probably the best night for this, since it's in our name." "So wait, you weren't trying to just scare them?" "Of course not! We just want to cleanse our reputation. We want people to follow us from love and devotion, not fear and terror!" "Then why did you come unannounced like that? No one was expecting you to come, so they just...balked, you know?" The Alicorn gazed at Rainbow with a curious expression on her face. The latter began to feel just a tad bit uncomfortable after a moment, but the princess replied. "So thou art saying that we scared them from our appearance?" "Well, yeah. They didn't all come see you get freed, so they barely remember that it even happened. Also, you came in a formal appearance unannounced. That usual intimidates people, since they aren't expecting it and don't understand why it wasn't announced." "Do you know a way in which we can avoid startling them without making this official?" "Well duh! Do you talk like this around your sister? I mean the whole "thees" and "thous" and the Royal We in the Royal Canterlot Voice." "Well, no. We use common laymans terms. And how dost thou know about Royal protocol? Art thou a scholar?" "If you didn't expect anypony to know proper etiquette and protocol, then why do you expect them to? Especially when you come unannounced and unofficially! They aren't going to understand what' going on. Why don't you try dropping the formal speech, and save it for when you are addressing large crowds officially? That's what your sister has done, and she gets by just fine." "So you want me to speak like this?" "Exactly!" Rainbow Dash was relieved to get part one out of the way. There was no telling why Luna figured that it would somehow workout between her and the ponies if they couldn't even relate. That's when she got an idea. A rather brilliant idea, to say so herself. "Hey, Luna?" "Yes?" "Um, your looking for a way to make everypony like you, right?" "Well, yes, that was my goal..." "Just follow me, okay?" Tonight's about to get twenty percent cooler...
Chapter Two: How to be Awesome, Pt. 1Luna knew that there were few things that had changed with ponies. They had always been afraid of the dark. During the daytime, all things are clear enough for the eye to see, for them to take in every little detail. Ponies could see each other, and were fully capable of assessing who they were dealing with. Since most ponies tended to choose their wording for their audience, they always judged their fellow ponies by their looks. They were usually right. It was for this reason that ponies had hated the night. Darkness comes with the night, and darkness necessitates a certain level of perception that most ponies lacked, and didn't care to obtain. Judgement by appearance was always simpler than by truth, and was "close enough" to become the norm. When these ponies are thrown into the night, however, they loose all sense of who that pony is. The lack of sight leaves them in the unknown, and they fear the unknown. They can't assess a wildcard. Any pony that they see in the dark can be anything, malevolent or benign, vicious or caring, or even just indifferent. That's what truly scares them. How do you face something you cannot analyze, something that requires instinct? Most of the ponies would rather face the Kraken, pulling itself raging from Tartarus itself, than face an unknown entity. It was their greatest strength, it was their truest weakness. Maybe this explained what Luna was feeling inside of her, that stirring in her chest in the company of Rainbow Dash. The blue pegasus was able to see beyond what most ponies saw, and not judge her based only off of her appearance. But maybe there was more to it than that. Rainbow had explained why the ponies feared her. Any pony can understand a villain such as Nightmare Moon, but confronting an unknown such as Luna? There's no way for them to fully comprehend what she was until the princess warmed up to them first. As she followed the cyan mare, still wearing that almost insufferable smirk plastered on her face, the princess of the night realized that she had underestimated that strange little pegasus. On the outside, Dash looked like nothing more than a brash, arrogant young mare who wanted nothing more than to receive the praise of everypony around her. Everyone expected so much from her, and the facade that she wore obviously fit the role. But does it make her happy? Luna could relate, in a way. Being one of two lonely diarchs in a nation where royalty is akin to being a god doesn't help one to recieve real friends, only panderers. And yet, here was a cyan mare leading Luna up towards a cloud house, with no notice or regard to the latter's title or station. It was...oddly appealing. Maybe, just maybe, she might have a friend... Yeah, about the same time that Celestia starts farting out the friendship reports instead of just recieving them the traditional way! Old habits die hard, Lulu. She gasped at the realization of what she had just thought. Celestia...farting scrolls? Luna broke out into giggles at the thought, recieving a curious look from the mare in front of her. By Starswirl's beard, those eyes were beautiful! GAH!!! What am I thinking?! Before Princess Luna had time to think about it, the odd pair had arrived at the floating fortress that Rainbow somehow associated with a...house? This thing was built like the a combination of the Wonderbolts' barracks and a military stockade. The place was huge! Dash seemed to notice the surprised look on Luna's face, and seemed to be somewhat confused for a moment. "What, you don't like it?" "W-well, it's n-not exactly about whether or n-not I l-like it...SWEET CELESTIA'S PASTY WHITE FLANK THAT'S HUGE!!! It took a moment for Luna to register the sound coming from Rainbow's now spasming body. It was probably the most annoying, grating, depraved, adorable sound to musically grace her sensitive ears. "Bua-hahahahahha!!!" There it was, the pinocle of triumph, the symphony of a true music, the most melodious, wonderful, stupendous, awesome sound that the beautiful night had ever heard, putting even the most gorgeous harmonies to shame when compared to the- "Luna, y'kay? "Huh?" "Luna, you're drooling." "What?!" It was true. Slobber was running down the side of her mouth faster than the water from a leaking drain pipe. Even Twilight Sparkle didn't do that, even when exposed to a rare copy of "On The Basic Principles Of Interdimensional Time Travel Using The Basic Harmonics Of The Surrounding Ether, Volume 12" Luna suddenly jerked back in surprise. This was bad. This was so many levels of bad! "Uh, it was, buah?" "Don't worry, I did the same thing when I saw the pricetag on this place!" Thank you, Rainbow, for the save! "Now let's go inside. I've got some things to show you." "Oh, that's amazing, Rainbow!" "Awww, yeah!" "That's the spot! Harder! HHAARRRDDEEERR!!" "I told you you'd enjoy this." "OOHHH!!" The last knot found itself worked out of the princess's back as Rainbow finnished kneading the hell out of it. She sighed and sat down across from Luna, gently nuzzling her way into the cloud she called a sofa. "It's really hard to concentrate when you've got knots the size of apples in your back. Learning how to remove them is the only thing that actually payed off from being dragged to the spa once or twice by Rarity, or even Flutters." "Wow. Could you teach us- teach me how to do that sometime?" "Sure," Rainbow responded, her smile turning into an evil grin. "As long as you practice on me." "That sounds...nice." The fun has been doubled!! "Well, time to move on to our main goal here!" Rainbow said, slowly getting up from her couch. "First of all, we've got to make you seem cute. Not that you aren't already, but in a less intimidating way." "Okay." "You've got to exude confidence! Make them love you with adorableness and just plain sexiness!!" Dash was quickly adopting the "drill sergeant" montra, striking a regal pose. "You can't stand around asking whether or not you're hot! You already know the answer. Just make them believe what you already know! About half of sexiness stems from just believing that you're plain drop dead gorgeous. Now, show me your sexy face!" Luna looked more than a little confused. "My sexy face?" "Well, you want them to love you, right? What's the first thing you hear when you ask what a stallion thinks of Celestia?" Really tall? "I don't know, what?" "Dayum, that mare is sexy! I'd love to lick that marshmallowy white flank!" "Lick that marshmallowy white...Dash!" The cyan pegasus chortled with barely surpressed mirth at that last remark. Rainbow pulled herself together, looking Luna dead in the eye with the most serious deadpan she could muster. "Admit it, she's kinda hot." For some reason, Luna felt something burn inside of her at that last bit. Dash thinks that Celestia's hot? It felt as if some white-hot coal were burning inside of her, making her want to... She remembered this feeling. It was jealousy. Yes, she remembered that feeling quite well. It was that same emotion that had almost destroyed Equestria almost a thousand years ago. But why was it back now? She looked over at her newfound friend, and it didn't take a genius to put it all together. Rainbow was cute, granted. But droolworthy? Nah. Yet there was something about the mare that seemed to stash butterflies into her stomach, like it or not. And in a way, she liked it. She liked it, oh so very much. But...but, she's a mare! "The second part, Luna, is your sense of humor. You've got to loosen up a little!" "Uh, well, what dost thou, er, do you do for humor?" "You think up something to say that makes people want to laugh. It doesn't matter what it is, whether we're talking about a crude yet laughable sex joke or an eggheaded brain fart. As long as it's funny, you've got the cat in the bag." Luna thought about it. Maybe there were some good jokes that she could remember from older times. Well, right then was as good a time to try them out as any, right? "Well, I'm not that good, but I do know one joke..." "Let's hear it!" "Okay. One day a mare, a stallion, and a griffon walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head. The mare pushed her beer away in disgust. The stallion fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The griffon, too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!!" Rainbow stared blankly at her face for a moment, the gears in her brain trying desperately to piece it all together. Instead of figuring it out, she simply figured that the use of the world "bastard" obviously made it funny. The confused look on her face fell off as the "punchline" of the joke finally dawned on her face. "You know, that would have been funnier if I'd caught on immediately. Why don't we try something simpler?" "Like what?" Rainbow smirked at the open opportunity. Time to bring out her best and blow that princess's dark, taught flank back to the moon! Oh, it's on, hot stuff! "Okay, so a mare walks into a bar with her friend, and her friend asks, 'Can I buy you a drink?' The mare politely declines, stating that 'the drink is bad for my legs.' 'Why, do they swell?' the friend inquires. 'No,' the mare responds. 'They spread.'" Luna gasped at the sheer lewdness of that comment. It was horrible, uncouth, uncivilized, dirty, and absolutely hilarious! She started chortling at that, and soon realized that she did in fact enjoy that style of humor. "Teach me more, oh master!" "Alright, so a stallion goes home to find his wife in bed with another..." "Ugh!" Rainbow Dash felt like her head had been taken by a hydra and slammed straight into an oncoming carriage before sitting on it with all twelve tons of its massive, insane bulk, then having it thrown into an over-sized meat grinder for good measure. That, or she had a hangover. The cyan mare tried to open her eyes, but the bright light quickly made her drop that option. Whatever had happened the night before, her mind was shooting blanks trying to remember. The splitting migraine was certainly not helping in that regard. "Kill me now." Her blankets stirred above her at that. Wait, is my blanket alive? She felt around, trying to pull it back up against her side. "Mmf, that's so warm," she commented, glad to feel the heat against her side as she snuggled up into her comforter. That was when it hit her. There was somepony else in bed with her. In bed with her. OH CELESTIA, TELL ME I DIDN'T!! Dash jumped up, frantically looking down at her marehood to be sure. The panic started to subside when she realized that her marehood hadn't been violated the night before. Well, that's a relief. With that crisis averted, Rainbow looked over to see who she'd actually shared her bed with. Her rose colored eyes met a pair of concerned teal colored ones. And with that, everything came rushing back. "Well, at least we didn't go too far." "Rainbow, please remind me to never try drinking ten double shots straight like that again. My head is killing me!" "You and me both, buddy. This calls for a glass of water, about five sandwiches, and a few more glasses of water." "Okay. Rainbow?" "Yeah?" "Did I do...awesome?" "Yeah, I guess you did. I sure as hay couldn't drink that much!" "Well that's good..." Luna trailed off, the awkwardness of the night before settling back in. Did I really get that plastered? she wondered aloud, considering whether or not that was the case. "I know one joint in town that'll give us all of those, and probably for free," Rainbow commented, trotting back over to Luna and helping her up from her rather decrepit state. "But first, we're going to need showers. Not at the same time, of course." Great going, Rainbow. That was a given. "Okay, sounds good to me." "Right this way, Luna." Rainbow walked out of her bedroom, striding down the halls of her labyrinthian home. The cyan pegasus checked over her shoulder to see if Luna was following. Instead, she found the alicorn staring rather intently at her flank. The latter realized that Rainbow had turned to look, and just as quickly averted her gaze, a deep blush flowing across her muzzle. Wait, was she checking my flank out? Dash thought about that for a moment, before doing her usual. Well, duh, stupid! You're the most awesome pegasus in all of Equestria, who *wouldn't** want to stare at your flank? I could probably make good money off of charging admissions to look at it.* Taking that in stride, she summed it up as only natural and left it at that. Not like hers is that bad, either... "No, bad brain!" "What?" "Wasn't talking to you, Princess." "Uh-huh." The two of them finally reached whatever destination was flowing through Rainbow's mind, landing right outside of a building made literally out of...gingerbread? Yeah, it was definitely an edible building. How long have I been gone? Luna had thought that a thousand years would change a lot of things, but making a business out of something she'd want to eat was a little strange. Actually, how has it not decomposed? Or been eaten? I suppose that if even a wooden house could get termites, a house make out of bakery goods that was actually edible to most forms of life would quickly disappear. The answer, of course, was simple: Pinkie Pie. The bustling mare burst right out of her shop to stare Luna dead on into her eyes. "HIYA, PRINCESS!!" The dark alicorn's eyes literally shrunk to pinpricks at that. How was it even possible for her to stretch her neck that far, and oh Celestia, the eyes! "Uh, hi?" Pinkie gasped at that last bit, before inexplicably wrenching the other two mares into her enterprise without any further ado. Luna could literally hear her flank smack right into her seat at a random booth as Pinkie set them down so that she could go get whatever it was she had planned for them to...eat. "Not the cupcakes, oh please, not the cupcakes!" Rainbow muttered, just barely loud enough for Luna to overhear. Apparently the cyan mare was beginning to regret her decision to pull them to this shop for some apparent reason. A very, very apparent reason. "Here you go, silly fillies!" "Uh, Pinkie?" "Yes, Dashie?" "You only serve this dish to ponies that are..." "Why of course, Dashie! Do you think your Auntie Pinkie would forget to give her best friend a free "I Just Found My Special Somepony Cake?!" Rainbow sighed at that. Pinkie could be Pinkie sometimes, but this was getting rather annoying in record time. "Pinks, I don't have a special sompony." "Of course you do, silly! She sitting right next to you!" "Uh, Pinkie? We're just friends." "What? But my Pinkie sense told me that you're more than that, and if my Pinkie Sense told me that it must be true, and if it's true then you're bound to be in love, and if you're not in love that means you're sad, and if you're sad, then I get all mopey wopey, but my Pinkie Sense never lies, and if my Pinkie Sense never lies, *gasp*, then she must inevitably be your special somepony, and if she's your special somepony then I need to throw you a part, and if I need to-" "Pinkie?" "Throw you a party, then I'll need you to at least accept what you already not in your little hearty warty, and if you-" "Pinks." "Don't accept the fact that you're really just lonely and need someone to be there with you when you're all mopey wopey and need somebody to give you a hug and hug you back and make foals with even if it's not possible and-" "PINKIE!!" "Yes, Dashie?" "Um, that's quite enough, we've got to, eh, go?" Pinkie slumped down, obviously looking rather defeated. "Okay, Dashie," she said, turning to go. "But if you ever change your mind about that, then you know where to go to get a great surprise party!" The pink pony suddenly chirped up, literally bouncing off towards her next destination: the kitchen. "Well, that was awkward."
Chapter Three: How to be Awesome, Pt.2It's great to be the Prince. Blueblood stared into his overly humongous mirror with a loving gaze. He made sure that his mane remained impeccable, leaving just enough out of place to keep him from coming off as overly pompous. Not that he wasn't, mind you, but if he was to fulfill his life goal of mating with every mare or stallion that was ever born, he'd need to be willing to not come across as overly concerned with his own appearance. After all, only a few percent of all ponies were actually nobility, and he would've been restricted to only that stock had he failed to...diversify. Blueblood chuckled at that. "Hot damn, you're a sexy beast," he muttered to himself. The white unicorn smiled with the smuggest expression imaginable as he put the final lock of his mane into place. "If only you weren't, well, me. I can only imagine what our babies would look like. After all, my superior blood should be spread around indiscriminately, shouldn't it?" "Bluey, dear, can you help me get up?" And here comes the fun part. "What, and soil my perfect manicure? My hooves should not be tainted by your common filth, Peasant!" Blueblood barely managed to suppress his sadistic mirth as he heard the mare laying in his quadruple King sized bed gasp in shock. Oh, how he loved to lead those mares on. While stallions could become just as heartbroken, they were usually a little different in their manner of sorrow, and as much as Blueblood enjoyed getting yelled at by some common idiot, he was always more excited by the heartbreak of a mare who had just been given her entire life's dream only to have it thrown back in her face. The best part was that there was no moral ambiguity in doing so. Even Celestia herself permitted it, as all his actions were doing was to disillusion the rather stupid and facile subjects that she had worked so hard to indoctrinate with goodwill. Better they learn after a one night stand than on the battlefield, right? "Of course I'm right!" Blueblood cried out excitedly as he looked into the mirror. "I'm always right, just like Auntie Tia says!" The gentle sobs of a kind and shattered mare drifted from his stained bedsheets, and the wicked stallion barely managed to suppress his strong urge to laugh as he made himself wipe away that arrogant smile. He thought for a moment about what his father had told him when he was but a young colt, about the disappointment that that horrid stallion had shown him before dying, and he managed to well up some tears for his next little adventure. "I'm sorry, Dearest. I thought that my joke would be funny, but I was just being dumb," Blueblood iterated, pulling the crying lump in his blankets into a warm, meaningful embrace. "Sh, sh, there there. It's okay, I would never hurt you. I love you far too much for that." Yeah right!! "Do you mean that?" the gray mare responded, looking up into his eyes with the most hopeful expression she had ever donned. Her magenta eyes met his kind, loving smile with what must have inevitably been a growing love and happiness. "W-will you stay with me?" "No," Blueblood replied, keeping that same self-indulgent little smirk that he'd been masking as kindness for the last couple of minutes. "I meant every word I said before. You're a worthless piece of trash, and you're horrible in bed. I've had my satisfaction, so get out." "W-what?" "I said 'get out.' Can't you take an order?" Blueblood's smile dropped to an annoyed scowl. "Pick up your things and get your filthy little carcass out of my room before I have you fed to my pet dragon." "B-but-" "But what? Did you honestly think that a pathetic, sorry excuse of a mare like yourself could actually get anywhere in life? Did you really think that somepony as amazing and utterly gorgeous as my princely self could possibly see anything in you other than as a sex toy? You're trash, and that's all you have ever been. Now get out of my sight before I vomit." The gray mare's expression broke, seeming to grow more and more downtrodden with every passing moment. A pair of tears started to trickle down her face as she stood up and started to trot towards the door, picking up the cello case after promptly closing it. Oh, how this was delicious! While Blueblood would love to say that she was utterly beautiful, for that's what she really was, he simply could not pass up the opportunity to utterly wreck the life of such a kind and caring mare. "Oh, and Vitavia? You are the worse cellist I have ever met. Why did you even bother picking that instrument up?" Blueblood knew that her actual name was Octavia, but if he had said it correctly, it would have given her some modicum of validity to her existence. While her name, her music, her demeanor, and her lustrous black mane all made the package utterly splendid, it would simply be out of his nature for Blueblood to voice such praise aloud to anypony. He put on a sadistic grin as Octavia stopped at the door. The gray mare seemed frozen in place for a moment, before setting her case on the ground. She turned to face Blueblood with the coldest look he had ever seen. He barely managed not to piss himself. The prince had elicited many different reactions over his years as a Prince of Equestria, but he'd never seen one so bitterly neutral. Some had screamed, others had cried, and a few had even gone to the whipping post for striking him, but none had ever reacted as such. "Perhaps you find this amusing, Blueblood. Perhaps you think that you are somehow untouchable, something that is above and beyond anypony else simply because you were born. You're not. Every day that you eat another bite of food, a bite that must be taken to keep you alive just like anypony else, is another day in which you will shit your feces all over yet another stall as you excrete what has been consumed. Do you know what? Your dung still reeks, and not of roses. Unfortunately, the truth is that your excrement is hardly what reeks the most about you." Octavia drew nearer, that same frozen, impassive look glued to her face. Her eyes seemed to eat everything that Blueblood was. He had been scared before, sure, but this was new. He wasn't scare; we was downright terrified. She drew herself up to him, stopping her muzzle mere inches from his own. "You smell of your rotten soul, left putrid and alone as you try and mask your loneliness in a twisted form of humor, finding solace in the misery of those around you. You have been given every opportunity to become anything that you could ever have wanted to be, and yet you chose the most pathetic form imaginable to represent yourself. I know what you've done, and now I've seen it for myself, but that still doesn't answer the question that now plagues me: Why? Why did you forget yourself like this? You had everything handed to you from the very beginning, and yet you've done nothing but throw it all away." No, not this... "You could have made me proud, Blue! Anypony could have been glad to have known you, ready to follow and seeking the leadership of a stallion who in truth is intelligent enough to do so. You didn't have to command, you could have inspired!" Oh God, please no!! Blueblood tried to hide it from himself, but a small trail of tears was now falling down his face, barely suppressed sobs starting to choke up in his throat. He tried to distract himself, but the beautiful mare in front of him kept him rooted in his place, frozen to her mesmerizing eyes. "You disappoint me, Blueblood. You could have been so much, you could have been great! Instead, you are nothing but a shadow of yourself, a faint image on the wall, highlighted only by the lack of your own true form. When I look at you, my Prince, I feel nothing but sorrow. You will never be that stallion you could have been, and you look like you never will change. I hope you have a great life, blissfully enjoying every moment of torment you inflict on others to relieve yourself of this reality. As for myself, you are dead to me." Octavia turned and trotted out the door, stopping only long enough to pick up the instrument that she had long used to express her very soul. They gray mare didn't even bother to look over her shoulder. Blueblood stood riveted in place, trying to grasp what had just transpired. He felt horrible inside, that bitter feeling that he had hidden from himself every day since his father's death, and he dragged himself over to his mirror. The white unicorn looked around his room, taking in every detail of every piece of furniture, of every one of his numerous portraits of none other than himself, and he wept. Blueblood wept for every mare and stallion he had wronged, for every time he had torn someone apart for his own amusement. He wept for all the potential he had left behind in favor of his own self-gratification, for every time he ranted to nopony in particular just for the sake of his own verbal masturbation, enjoying every nuance of his own speech. The young stallion wept for what he had become in favor of what he should have been. But above all else, he wept for the father he had failed. The young prince wept inconsolably for hours, denying his numerous concerned servants from entering his room, his only domain. Servants who cared for him because it was their job, not because they felt any modicum of love or respect for him outside of his undeserved power. He had thrown away everything dear to him for the sake of hiding his emotions, and he knew it. He wanted to be loved, to be cared for, but had acted brashly many a time to hide his own fear of it. This wasn't the first time that the prince had wept, nor would it be the last, but he resorted to what he always did: narcissism. Blueblood stared at the mirror long and hard, idly convincing himself that it was all Octavia's fault and none of his own, that he was a good pony and that they were the ones at fault. He started to smile a bit when he thought about how great he really was. Yes, he was the prince for Celestia's sake! Soon, the young stallion stoop up, wiping away his tears as he trotted out from his room. He listened to the concerned questions of his 'mindless' minions as they asked many a question with faux concern, and he convinced himself that their concern was indeed a valid one. After all, who could help but love such an incredibly gorgeous stallion? "Luna, what are you doing?" Rainbow asked, an amused look on her face. She stared in awe as the Night Goddess wolfed down her fourteenth pastry. "You've already won, for Celestia's sake!" "Mpff nom!" Luna tried to reply as she finished chewing, reaching idly for yet another morsel to shove down her own throat. As soon as the last one was gone, Luna tried to hork another down, but was stopped by Rainbow's hoof. "As much as I enjoy watching you eat those, aren't you sure that's not a little...unhealthy?" Rainbow asked, trying not to laugh insanely at her newfound friend. "Wait...can alicorns even get fat?" "Nope!" Luna replied cheerfully, before stuffing another one into her already bulging mouth. "Celestia eaphs these all thef timeph!" Rainbow couldn't help it anymore. The cyan mare fell to the ground, laughing uproariously at the princess's antics. Luna looked down at her with a truly confused expression. "Whatsph tho funny?" "Your face!" "Dost thou imply that we-I am ridiculous or something?" "Only when you're eating a stack of Pinkie's donuts faster than she can!" The pink mare had given them a 'small' batch of the pastries when they were leaving, and it was supposed to last a few days even at Rainbow's insane rate. Naturally, they decided to compete to see who could hork down the most on the way back to Rianbow's house. There was no real contest there, with the light blue mare barely finishing six as it was. "You know, Luna, you look pretty cute when you're scarfing those." That's when the dark alicorn started to choke on her baked goods. Rainbow continued to laugh for a moment, before realizing that it wasn't a ploy. "Ohmygosh, are you alright?!" When Luna fell over, trying to breath some non-existent air, Rainbow started to panic. She started to look around for her best failsafe, but Twilight was nowhere around. It was just her and the princess, and that meant that she was the only one who could do something about it. Even in her panic stricken mind, Rainbow Dash could still remember reading one of Twilight's books on CPR and the Heimlich Maneuver after Daring Do had used it a while back. Something about a Diamond Dog and choking...She reached her hooves around the alicorn, pulling that mare's back up against her midriff as she started to pull in at the base of her ribcage. It took several tries, and yet there was still no getting the lodged morsel out of Luna's esophagus. "C'mon, think, Rainbow, think!" She racked her brains for a few more seconds before realizing that her forehooves were slightly misplaced. The memory of the book's diagrams came back to mind, and she imitated them as best she could. Time was of the essence. Rainbow wrapped her hooves around her friend's midriff again, but this time she placed her hooves in a slightly better position, before knocking the food out on the third heave. That's when she noticed that Luna was no longer breathing. "Oh Celestia damnit no!" Rainbow reached down and flipped Luna over, trying to lay her gently down on her back. The Princess of the Night was not breathing, and with closer inspection, Rainbow found that there was no pulse as well. "No, no, NO!! DON'T DIE ON ME LUNA!!" Rainbow looked around, tears streaming her face as she tried to see if anypony was around to help her out. They were outside of Ponyville and well beyond earshot of anypony. Why'd I have to move so damn far out?! Rainbow's panicked look subsided as she realized that it was up to her and her alone to save her friend. She looked down at her friend's face, and she decided right then not to give up, not until she was sure that there was no way to save that splendid mare. Maybe the two hadn't known each other that long, but there was no way in hell that Rainbow would leave her like this. "Let's think...Medical Resuscitation, Volume One mentioned the basics in how to-" Dash stopped talking aloud, instead trying to get her friend's heart beating again. Placing her hooves in position, the cyan mare started thrusting vigorously, knowing that even if she broke Luna's ribs, it would be better than to do so too weakly and let her die. The first sentence in the book had said something that was drilled into the mind of every pony that ever read it: if they're already dead, don't be afraid to kill them. Dead is dead, and so all you're doing is trying to bring them back. Don't be afraid to do what you have to. Rainbow remembered that, and she employed it right then without a moment's hesitation. She put her mouth up against Luna's, drawing out the used air to replace it with her own fresh air before going back to trying to start the heart again. She kept at it, wishing oh so fervently for a defibrillator right about then. Luna drifted in the void, feeling nothing save the strange sensation of disembodiment. She knew this feeling, it was the feeling that she felt every day that she moved the moon in its place. How she had ended up in some strange void, though, was a mystery to her. Where am I? She tried to look around, but there was nothing there anyways, and no body through which to move within anyways. It took a moment for the last moments of her life to start coming back, but Luna started to realize what had just happened. Am I...dead? "Yes, Daughter." Mom?! A light started to form itself in front of the young alicorn, shaping itself into the image of another alicorn. The figure was quite tall and regal, looking much like a more noble version of Celestia. The mane was of a reddish hue, and sat still and tangible down to her shoulders. "Yes, Dear, it's me." Mom!! "Hush now, we don't have much time." What are you talking about? Rainbow could barely feel the tears that were streaming uncontrollably down her face as she tried time after time to get her friend's heart moving again. While the cells weren't completely dead yet, it was starting to approach the allotted time when the brain would actually start to suffer... The cyan mare pushed her lips up against Luna's yet again, forcing more oxygen into her system despite the fact that the blood wasn't really flowing. She wanted to be sure that there was something in there if, no when the heart started again. "C'mon, Luna..." Rainbow muttered, her voice cracking as she continued to pound on Luna's chest, trying desperately to start a still unbeating heart. "Daughter, you are dead, it is true, but you still have time yet to live, time in which you are supposed to live. And Luna?" Yes, Mother? "Be sure to thank Rainbow Dash for me, will you?" Okay. "Well, I must be going. Don't worry, you can see me again in a- No spoilers, my child." With that, the image of the white alicorn started to fade, her kind smile disappearing with the rest of her. Luna was soon surrounded by darkness yet again. Suddenly, she felt a pain in her chest that shouldn't have been there. Rainbow felt the start of a heartbeat, and she could hardly contain herself. Without hesitating, she continued to try reviving her friend, suddenly filled with hope. Her prayers were being answered. Thank you, Celestia. Luna started to feel herself being tugged into a body that felt cold and unalive to her, but she could at the same time feel its heart beginning to stir once more. Without hesitating, she dove into the still body, trying herself to get its heart beating again through sheer will. "YES!!" Rainbow hollered as she felt Luna's heart starting to beat more regularly, and she dove down and planted a firm kiss on the alicorn's lips. It was a true kiss, not another attempt at resuscitation, and she felt her tongue slipping into Luna's mouth. What's more, she could start to feel the dark princess's own returning the favor. After another moment, Rainbow pulled back, meeting the teal eyes of that wonderful, gorgeous mare she had just barely managed to save. "What did I miss?" Luna asked, still a little dazed from the excursion. Rainbow just laughed, before pulling the alicorn into a deep, heartfelt hug. She cried into her dear friend's mane, but her tears were ones of joy rather than sorrow. For the rest of her life, Rainbow would always point to that moment as the happiest of her life. "Oh, I'll tell you later. But for now, we have got to get you to a hospital." They laughed together, before the young pegasus picked up Luna, slinging her over her shoulder to carry back to the Ponyville Proper and the awaiting medical attention. Neither of them noticed that the sun was rising as the moon set regardless of Luna's lack of influence.
