Cloud Vicious was walking down the cold, marble hallway, thinking to himself about his last assassination. Of course, it taking place not even 5 minutes ago, it was hard not to think about it. He had thought of all the work that went into it, all the careful planning and cunning manipulation.
From the day the young little foal was born, Cloud Vicious had his wicked eye on him. Almost every event in his life, from his first birthday where he was gifted his Grandfather’s Military Helmet, to the day he was accepted into the Royal Guard, to the day where he defeated the succubus Queen, Chrysalis (who, unbeknownst to him, was greatly weakened by Cloud Vicious), thus giving him both the position of Celestia’s Personal Guardsman and the high bounty on his head. It was, of course, at this moment that Vicious had struck, instantly killing the poor Equestrian with a blow to the head. Now all he had to do was collect the reward, and then repeat the process again.
Just as he was about to leave Canterlot however, his unmatchable senses had picked up a quiet noise. It was one he was all too familiar with. It was the noise fools who thought they could get the best of Cloud Vicious made before their certain demise. When he had turned to see the threat, he couldn’t help but be confused. Before him was an Equestria, an Alicorn no less. With a Black coat and a blue mane, the creature attempted (but poorly) to hide behind a bush. Normally, Cloud Vicious would simply ignore these little pests, as creatures who do not actively look upon Cloud Vicious quickly forget him entirely. Not to mention, such a cliche’ and normal Equestria would be a waste of his talents. But still, he felt something. Like a sense of slight danger.
Cloud Vicious walked towards the bush, and uttered the words:
“This your first time playing Hide n’ Seek?”
Of course, the sound of a thousand voices, all dark and evil, speaking at once startled the poor Alicorn. The fact that he could see him was just the icing to the cake.
“B-b-b-but how c-could you see me?”
Was all that the black coated Equine could utter.
“How couldn’t I see you?”
“I’m the greatest at stealth, the best hider in all of Equestria! Nobody, not anyone, not a single soul can see me unless I decide they can!”
The Blue Mained Alicorns’ voice began to grow, as if the creature was beginning to become agitated.
“Guess not.”
Cloud Vicious normally wouldn’t spare so much as a breath to such low-life vermin, but he was feeling oddly devious today.
“I am Lord Anders! The Element of Darkness! I will not be bested by some green mask wearing scumbag!”
Lord Anders began shaking with rage. He was, in his mind, truly the greatest in Equestria. But before he had truly lost it, he had realized. He’s still the master of manipulation.
“Tell me, how many souls have you ever lied to? Cheated to?”
Lord Anders had asked, thinking he could still come out on top.
Cloud stopped for a second and thought. What an odd question, he wondered. However, all it took was a second before he had realized what Lord Anders was up to.
“1,573”.
Of course he was low-balling it, but it didn’t matter. It was enough.
“What?!”
Now Lord Anders was pissed. This joker was obviously lying. At least, he hopped. His mind became chaotic, trying to figure out whether or not he should accept this as truth or not. But before he suffered an emotional breakdown, he had come up with an idea. A test. Surely, he would catch this liar.
“Alright you little bag of lies, I challenge you...”
“Blood Cloud.”
“Blood Cloud... wow what a gay name...to a boxing match! If you lose, you leave Equestria forever. Deal?”
“And when I win?”
“You won’t!”
Cloud pondered this for a moment. He really didn’t have anything to lose. He’d still come back to Equestria even if he lost. Though, at the same time, he didn’t have anything to gain either. It’d be a waste of time. Still, there was the off-chance that Anders could pose a challenge, and it would give him the ability to aptly test his skills.
“Fine.”
In a flash, both the Alicorn and the mysterious Pegasus appeared in boxing ring in the middle of nowhere.
Bewildered, Lord Anders seemed to struggle to utter the words:
“What... just happened?!”
“I took us both to my little pocket dimension. You can call it the purple dimension.”
“Wow, the gayness fountain just doesn’t stop for you, huh?”
“It’s named after my hometown, a town where all the tops of the trees are purple, as are the manes and tails of the Equestrians born there.”
“But-”
“It was all burned down by Celestia’s royal guard. The trees, the homes, the little critters, and even my family. All but my little sister. I managed to save her. The names in memory of it all. But enough talking. Now we fight.”
Boxing gloves had appeared on the front two legs of both Equestrians. As they both stood on their hindlegs, the background of the arena had begun to become more erratic. Before, it was a calm sea of different shades of purple mixing together, flowing like a river. Now it had become a whirlpool, as different hues smashed together. The chaos of it all had distracted the foolish Alicorn, and in a single, painful, humiliating blow, Cloud Vicious had struck him down. He was already done. Not even a minute of fighting, and the Equestria was lying on the floor, limp, but not dead. Unconscious.
What a pity. Cloud Vicious had hoped for a decent fight, but as was proven to him yet again, hoping is pointless. Cloud Vicious peered into the Alicorns’ mind, and found his place of residence. He teleported him there, and left him to rot.
70 days had passed before Lord Anders had finally awakened. He lifted himself up onto all four hooves and took a quick look around. Home, he had thought.
He quickly remembered Cloud Vicious, and the short battle they had waged. He remembered a searing pain, and then nothing. Everything past that was blackness. Could he have... lost?
Suddenly, he became angry. Neigh, something more. Enraged. No, something even more than that! Completely and utterly saddlesore.
Nobody can beat him. Not Celestia, not Discord, not the Elements of Harmony, not anypony! Thus, there was only one explanation. Blood Cloud must have cheated. There is no other way. Lord Anders is perfect in every imaginable way. He’s the master tactician. The master strategist. The greatest ninja, the fasted alicorn, the single most magical being in existence. He was Lord Anders! The element of darkness! He nearly brought the world to an end multiple times, and if he cared enough to, surely he could truly end it all whenever he pleased! Some stupid, ugly, one-winged, green-masked cyclops couldn’t possibly hope to beat him! Sure he can teleport people, sure he has his own little “pocket dimension”, and sure he has a pretty bitchin’ jacket, but it doesn’t matter! He couldn’t have won! Not on fair terms at the very least!
And then it hit him. He cheated. There is no other way. Blood Cloud must have cheated.
Lord Anders spent no time fooling around. He set off to find Blood Cloud and end this nonsense once and for all. Of course, this would have been an impossible task had Blood Cloud not wanted to face Lord Anders again. Unfortunately for Lord Anders however, Blood Cloud was more than willing to brawl once more.
Cloud Vicious payed close attention to the words of Lord Anders, hearing him scream and whine about being the “Element of Darkness”. While this was obviously untrue, the reason Anders would think this was true was interesting to Vicious. While it would have taken a normal pony decades if not centuries to come to the conclusion that Vicious did, it only took him mere minutes. Anders must have had one of the Shards of Darkness, a piece of the fabled Heart of Darkness. Cloud Vicious had many of the shards, but still his collection layed uncomplete. Having Anders’ shard would certainly be nice. Thus, he appeared before Anders a few hours after he awoke.
“Have a nice nap?”
Anders feelings of violent rage began to swell once more. The very image of Blood Cloud made him sick. Still, he fought to control himself.
“You. Me. Again.”
Anders struggled to speak these words, his entire being shaking in hatred.
“Sure thing. This time however, I decide the terms.”
Lord Anders was about to reject that offer, but he realized he was in no place to argue.
“A three round match. First round: Sword fighting. Second round: Magic fighting. Third Round: No Weapons Melee Fighting. I win, you give me the Element of Darkness. You win, and I give you all my power. Deal?
Of course, as usual, Cloud Vicious had nothing to lose. But poor little Anders did not no of this.
“Deal.”
Cloud Vicious gave Lord Anders two hours to prepare. While this time should have been spent practicing and meditating, Lord Anders used it to vent his frustrations. Cloud Vicious, on the other hand, simply spent it thinking about how great it will be to have another Shard of Darkness in his possession.
The two hours had ended, and in an instant both combatants were once again teleported to the Purple Dimension.
On one side, Lord Anders stood, bearing his finely crafted Sword of Darkness. Its grip pure black, its blade an evil iron. Cracking around it were jolts of blue magical energy, giving it is awe inspiring glow.
On the other side, stood Cloud Vicious, wielding the Sword of the Ex Chosen One. Once a grand sword, with a bright red grip, a golden hilt, and a shining Pearl White blade made out of the most finely crafted Diamonds ever made in Equestria, it has since fallen into dark hooves. Now its’ once amazing radiance has been reduced to something from a horror show. Its blade was now covered in chaotic energy, constantly changing color and texture. Its handle a deep purple, and its hilt appeared as broken bronze. Cloud Vicious had become attached to the blade over the years, as he too had fallen far from his once pious stature.
The fight had began.
The fight had ended.
Lord Anders was struck down by the accursed blade. But the torment did not end there, as the blade stole Anders’ very soul and had entrapped it in the crystal, located on its hilt. Cloud Vicious, feeling rather malicious, placed the blackened soul into a body Anders knew all to well.
It was of the once king of the koopas, Bowser.
Lord Anders stood up, examining his new body. The second he realized what Cloud had done, he had felt a rage so fierce, so fiery, so out of control, so incredibly powerful that even an Angry Marine would take a second to admire it. This anger, of course, was one not meant to be felt by mere mortals, and Anders became dazed and confused in his fury. He swatted at everything he could see, regardless of whether or not he was in reach.
If Cloud Vicious could feel happiness, there is no doubt that he would be laughing his hardest now, taunting the once proud Lord Anders. But, his past had long ruined him, destroying his happiness and thus, with one more blow, Vicious struck down Lord Anders. This time however, he was not holding back nor was he intending on trapping his soul. No, this time, Anders was defeated. He was killed. He was gone.
Vicious stood on both hindlegs, proclaiming that he was truly the mightiest, most cunning, most powerful soul in all of Equestria. Fangirls from all over the world rushed towards him, their bodies full of awe. They cheered him on, screaming his name at the top of their lungs. Some stood to defile the body of the once proud Element of Darkness, while others rushed to simply touch the glorious body of Cloud Vicious.
Cloud however, was having none of this. The chaos was ear-wrenching. Thus, he teleports himself home. The fangirls however would surely find him, and thus, he needed a disguise. The cunning Cloud Vicious was nothing but clever however, and thus he already had the best costume already in mind.
With one yell, he transformed his body into a being that was once lost to the lands of Equestria.
“ZABRAKADABRA!”
In a flash, he became a Zebracorn, a cross between an alicorn and a zebra. Now, surely, nobody could tell he was infact Cloud vicious. With yet another disaster out of the way, he set off to collect his prize.
It had been one week since Lord Anders was slain in gladiatorial combat by the ever powerful Zebracorn Cloud Vicious. One week since he was tasked with the assassination with some unimportant Wonderbolt. A minute since he finished that task and began making his ever so careful planned escape.
Cloud Vicious stuck to the shadows and the ceilings as normal. He flew faster than the Wonderbolts chasing him, hit harder than the guards brawling with him, and projecting more magic than the Unicorns blasted at him. It was a minute since all that chaos had ended, and everyone had already forgotten everything about Vicious.
Vicious walked to his home, a reasonably sized metallic castle floating in the void of the Purple Dimension. There, he thought to himself how boring life had been ever since his battle with Lord Anders. Once he took pride (but not joy, for his harsh life has made it impossible for the Zebracorn to feel any happiness.) in the destruction he caused, but now there’s not even a slight sense of satisfaction in doing it anymore. Now it seemed pointless. Boring. Dull. The one thing he found interesting in life was gone.
But why? Lord Anders was pathetic weakling. One no different than all the other beings he murdered. All he had going for him was the Shard of Darkness. Cloud Vicious pondered this for a moment, before thinking to himself:
“Is it possible that I found schadenfreude from Lord Anders?”
It certainly was a possibility. The raging lunatic did cause quite a show. After thinking about it some more, Cloud Vicious determined that this was the cause of the recent lack of satisfaction. Nothing could match up to the defeat of Lord Anders.
Now, Vicious slumped into a depressed state. The one thing in his life that made it worth living. The one thing that gave him purpose. Gone.
Vicious no longer saw point in living. Thus, he pulled out his wicked sword, The Sword of the Ex Chosen one. He began quietly chanting ancient lyrics to an old poem in another language, preparing his mind and soul for the action he was to commit. Translated, these words would mean:
“CRAWLING IN MY SKIN THESE WOUNDS THEY NEED SOME HEALING”
Of course, the only cure for these wounds was death. And so, Cloud Vicious stabbed himself in the abdomen, and watch as his blood poured onto the floor in the gallons. His time on this world was fleeting. He life was slipping away. And, in one final breath, he said “Sorry for the sins I have done.” He had died.
Suddenly however, he found himself not without conscious, but instead in another realm. One full of wicked beings, from the Crimelord Vixen to the Alicorn Riff Wrath. All over the hellish world where lives Cloud Vicious had taken over the many years. All of them being tortured for one reason or another.
As he tread along the ashes that made up the ground in this world, he saw many sights that would make regular ponies vomit. He saw Schatten, an alicorn he had ended 3 years ago being pulled apart, only to be put back together to be pulled apart again. Up ahead he found another target of his, Pain Suffragentice.
Cloud Vicious remembered how much Pain would go on and on with meaningless poetic lines. How he would do nothing but talk big about himself, which of course made him end up contradicting himself. But the worst of it, the part that made Cloud really want to end his life, was how he would talk about his alternative names. Oh how Cloud struggled for weeks before he finally purged them from his memory. The very sight of him made him angry.
Still, he fought over this anger, and kept on.
Cloud eventually came across a tall black cathedral, the likes of which seemed to defy the laws of reality. Its twisting spires and its seemingly impossible height gave it the impression of something made by the Devil himself. The constantly shifting textures and colors on all of the exterior walls would drive many to insanity. The random noises echoing from within would make lesser beings have emotional breakdowns. Thankfully, Cloud was all too use to these very kind of things, and thus it did not bother him in the slightest.
He moved into the castle, approaching its large door and opening it. He walked inside, thinking he would find out what this place was and why he is here. Instead, he heard a familiar voice. One of a certain Dark Lord.
He heard him wept and beg for assistance. The cries made Cloud Vicious feel the same feelings he had when he was fighting Lord Anders. He had to see it for himself.
Cloud Vicious, being the stealth extraordinaire that he is, snuck up and watching Lord Anders. What he thought would be a good five minutes of crying turned into something from a poorly written erotica novel. There, Darkside, the bane of the Justice League of America, stood. Trying to comfort the alicorn. Even Cloud Vicious couldn’t help but gape in awe as Darkside began making advances towards Lord Anders. Lord Anders, even more surprisingly, wasn’t resisting. He seemingly wanted it. Cloud Vicious had two choices before him. Break up the party or watch it unfold. Unfortunately for every being in and out of existence, for some unholy unforgivable reason, he chose the latter. This would come to be the only thing he ever regretted in his entire immortal life. It was as if the entire world stopped in horror as Darkside pounded the evil Alicorn over and over. The universe itself seemingly stopped spinning, as if it was attempting to beg for the horrorshow to stop.
It ended with Darkside was done. He pulled out, dressed up in his gimmicky costume, and left the now satisfied Lord Anders. Cloud Vicious, once he was done puking his guts out, walked towards Lord Anders, intent on slapping him straight. When he walked up to Lord Anders, the dark one began to beg for mercy and forgivness.
“Oh Celestia please! Please Blood Cloud Please leave me be! I swear I’ll never challenge you to another fight again! I swear I’ll leave you and all of Equestria alone just please leave me in peace!”
“You just fucked Darkside and you expect me to walk away uncaring?”
Lord Anders’ face turned to horror as, yet again, he was killed by Cloud Vicious. However, instead of simply staying dead, he was reincarnated right before Cloud Vicious. And again. And again. And again. And again...
After about 5,430 deaths, the satisfaction felt by Cloud Vicious began to wear off. Lord Anders had become unrecognizable, as all the scars added up to create some horrific being. Before he was begging to be left alone, now he was begging to be killed for good. Cloud Vicious, being the Zebracorn that he is, decided that it was now time to finally let the poor SoB die. And thus, with one final blow from his sword, Sword of the Ex Chosen One, he struck down Cloud Vicious for good. Now his very soul was gone from existence forever.
Vicious now looked around him. It was nothing but people he murdered everywhere. People he either hated, loathed, or simply didn’t care for. It sucked. Thus, he began to plan to go back home in the Purple Dimension. But to leave the underworld was no easy task, even for him. He needed the assistance of a being more powerful than him. But who? Who could possibly be more powerful than him in this forsaken world? The answer, little did he know, was right behind him. For there stood the Feminine god that started it all. To some, she was known as the All-Mother, to others, The Abandoner. But Cloud Vicious knew her true name.
“Lauren, why do you come to me now?”
“You have done my work, Cloud Vicious. You have ended many creatures not worthy to bear the name “Creation of Lauren Faust.” And for that, you have my gratitude. I will send you back to your world, so that you may continue your duty. Go, and be well, Cloud Vicious.”
And with that, Cloud Vicious was teleported to his castle in the Purple Dimension.
Now he had meaning again. Purpose. To hunt those unworthy of life. He could once again find satisfaction, knowing he was the hand of God herself. Now, he had new targets in mind.
Life was good. At least, as good as it could get for Cloud Vicious. Another week had went by since his encounter with God, and since then hes being killing deviants of all kinds non-stop. From the descendent of King Sombra, Heavy Matter, to the ever annoying rockstar, Zino Xenon. Nobody was innocent. Not anymore. At least, not in the eyes of Cloud. In his eyes, all these beings had to be purged.
Not only this, but his feelings of satisfaction of a job well done had returned. As if purging Lord Anders from the very fabric of reality was enough to bring it all back. It did not matter though. Even if it hadn’t returned, Cloud Vicious would still be out there, stalking, killing all he could.
In fact, he was just about to set off on another assassination, when something rather odd happened. Two weeks ago he had transformed himself into a Zerbracorn, a cross between a Zerba and an Alicorn. However, he had never switched back. At least, not until just now. It happened all on its own.
What is this? The greatest user of magic in all of Equestria, the one who decides when anything happens if it happens, but just now his form switched back all on its own! Not only this, but his other many powers had left him as well. It made no sense! Had... had Lauren abandoned him? Had she left him to die like she did the world of Equestria? It didn’t matter in the end though. He was powerless. With his last ounce of strength, he once again chanted in an old language:
“CRAWLING IN MY SKIN THESE WOUNDS THEY NEED SOME HEALING”
And with that, he once again killed himself. He once again appeared in the world of the undead. But that was not enough. No, he was useless. No reason for him to exist. He wanted to end it all. He again ended his life. Or his death. Or whatever.
Now, he appeared in the UnderUnderWorld. A world reserved for the most vile, evil beings to exist. Beings like Matthew Ward and and that one douche from High School, Billy Carlson. Beings so vile that not even Cloud Vicious could stomach his hatred for them.
His hatred grew to absurd lengths, so absurd that his powers miraculously came back. It all became clear now. Lauren wanted him to go to the UnderUnderWorld, to purge the unclean here. Within two seconds, he took over the UnderUnderWorld. He spawned minions made of pure darkness to massacre the beings that inhabited it. He wanted them all to be purged, all but one.
Lord Anders.
For him, he thought, would be a special treatment. For if it were not for Lord Anders, Cloud Vicious would have never realized his true potential. Thus, he was to never be truly killed. Instead, they would murder him over and over, allowing to reincarnate for eternity. A fitting end to the once “Element of Darkness”. As he sat on his through, thinking to himself that he was truly the price of the UnderUnderWorld, the true prince of Darkness and Evil, he waited to see Lauren come before him, and thank him like she did the last time they talked.
To his surprise however, rather than a glorious goddess, a simple Zerbracorn appeared before him, emerging from a bright purple portal.
“Hello, Blood Cloud.”
“What is it that you want?”
“I have come on behalf of Faust and the African Republic.”
The Zebras, oddly enough, stem from a nation known as “Africa”. Nobody is quite sure where the name comes from, not even the Zebras.
“I wish to tell you that your efforts in cleansing the world of filth have not gone unnoticed.”
“Darn.”
“Fear not, for I have come to grant you a single wish as your reward. Keep up the work, and more goods may come your way in time...”
Cloud Vicious had to ponder this for a moment. There was not really anything he cared enough to want. Anything but one thing.
“I wish to be Princess of the Zebras.”
The Zebracorn had to give pause at this... odd request. Part of him wanted to question why. The stronger part of him however, knew asking that would be a really bad idea. Thus, kept his tongue, and with his Zebracorn magic, he turned Cloud Vicious into a female Zebracorn.
The clothing he wore, however, hid all the changes of his physical form. He looked just the same as before from the outside, albeit a more feminine eye from his one eye whole.
“Know this, Zebracorn. I am to be addressed as a female from now on. Call me a male once, by any means, and I will make you regret it.”
“Yes, my princess.”
“Good.”
With that, Cloud Vicious made his way back to the Purple Dimension. He once again plotted the demise of the scum of the world.
