Fear. Fear is a terrifying emotion. It holds you down. Holds you back. Stops you from ever taking risks. Stops you from ever trying. Stops you from living. Fear is a horrible emotion. Fear is the enemy.

But.

Sometimes fear is an ally. Sometimes fear gives you that little push. That little push we all need. When your scared of failing, fear stops you from trying. If you don't try, you can't fail. Simple. But fear can also make you try. Because the only thing stronger than fear is Regret.

And right now, as she walked down the halls of Canterlot Castle. Fear and regret. Were the only things keeping Cadence moving. Regret that she hadn't seen Twilight in nearly a year. Fear that if she didn't she'd lose her forever.

Cadance was slowly making her way towards the library tower. Towards Twilight.

It had been a hard couple of months. Cadance was better. That much was true. Through not without great effort. She had only just been released a week ago. Reetro had finally thought she was ready. Ready to face the world once again. Reetro had insisted on keeping Cadance on medication, probably due to having a panic attack when she tried to leave the hospital room.

The last six days were 'difficult' to say the least. Celestia had made it mandatory that Cadance have an escort wherever she went. The last thing she wanted was to make Cadance feel like a prisoner but she had no choice. She couldn't risk nearly losing her niece again.

Cadance was grateful and reluctant at the same time. She was grateful that Celestia made it only Spark, Shining, or Reaper that escorted her. On the rare chance they were not available she would sit in the hospital room with Reetro. On the rarer chance that she couldn't she would stay with Celestia. She was grateful for the help and support, but reluctant to take it.

There were still problems. There would always be problems. Sometimes the anxiety would get the best of her and she'd lock herself away in her room for a few hours and wait to be sedated by Reetro. Sometimes she'd wake up screaming in the middle of the night, only to be restrained by Spark or Reaper, and sometimes she'd just break down and cry, only for Shining to come and hold her.

Cadance loved and hated every moment.

She loved her friends and family but she hated being so weak.

And that heart..... Oh the heart.

Cadence didn't notice it right away, but when she did.......

The once shining pure glass heart that adorned her flank now had a giant crack running down the middle, almost like a cut, stained blood red. Every time she looked at it she remembered. Remembered that year, that month, that week 'that day' she hated the sight of it, a curse to constantly remind her.

That she was broken.

….............................................................................

Celestia had called the courts wizard Nebula Starscream, to investigate this phenomenon and to her surprise found results.

“I understand Your highness but I must ask again whose Cutie mark has changed?” Nebula questioned.

“It is classified information Nebula. Have you results on the subject or not?” Celestia warned.

“Forgive me your highness, I only asked because I’ve found quite a bit of information, I just need to know under what category this falls under.” Nebula stated.

“Category?” Celestia questioned.

“Yes, you see there are quite a lot of reasons that a pony's Cuite mark could change. Ranging from Involvement with dark magic, to loosing the ability to interact with there true passion anymore. There are many reasons a pony could lose their Cutie mark but it would take a substantial amount of force to cause it to happen.” Nebula explained.

“I see. Well what if the pony in question suffered a large amount of emotional damage that made them stop believing in their purpose anymore, or that they no longer felt that they deserved it anymore” Celestia tried to word it carefully as to not reveal Cadance's identity.

“Then that would fall into the sufferment category. When a pony truly no longer believes that their purpose doesn't matters anymore or that their purpose is no longer true their Cuite Mark changes to adapt. For example if a pony loves to run but lost their legs then they can no longer do what they were destined to. So their Cuite mark would change. They can no longer do what they love so their Cuite Mark alters like them.” Nebula seemed confused.

“I understand. But... Say a pony whose Mark represented Love.... Had their heart broken, would that fall into the sufferment category as well?” Celestia didn't want to reveal too much but she couldn't watch Cadance suffer anymore.

“Ah I see. Well yes they would. If a pony who believes in Love, has their heart broken, then they no longer believe in love, therefore they're entire meaning is changed. But again I must state, that some pony must have had their heart broken very badly for there entire purpose to be altered.” Nebula seemed worried.

“Indeed. I ask because I must know if there is a way to reverse the effects. To make a pony believe in love again.” Celestia hoped for a helpful answer.

“It is difficult to say your highness. There are a lot of recorded cases of Cuite Marks changing into something else, but very few of them changing back.” Nebula lowered his head.

“None?” Celestia felt pained.

“It depends. Dark magic cases are the most common to be reversed because of simply removing the interfering effects that caused it. While sufferment can..... vary. It's hard to say. If this pony truly suffered a horrible act that caused them to completely renounce their passion for Love. Then it would take a miracle to reverse those effects.” Nebula stated bitterly.

“I see.” Celestia lowered her head and thought of Cadance.

“I could try to look into it some more if you wish your Highness?” Nebula said in a lighter tone.

“Please do and thank you Nebula” Celestia smiled a broken smile.

Nebula turned and walked out of the throne room. Celestia sighed and continued her work.

…......................................................................

Cadance stared at her Cuite mark. Just stood and stared. Until a voice interrupted her thoughts.

“I don't think it looks that bad.....” Cadance jumped. It was Shining.

“Thanks... but we both know that isn't true.” Cadance looked back at her mark.

Shining frowned. A light purple aura began to surround his horn, as well and Cadance's flank, before it suddenly changed back into her old Cutie mark. Cadance sighed.

“Better?” Shining asked.

“No.... Look I know you mean well Shining but... it feels like I'm wearing a mask. I'm tired of hiding, but I can't stand the sight of it anymore. Looking at this... just feels like a lie.” Cadance closed her eyes.

“Sorry.” Shining lowered his head.

“Don't be.” Cadance smiled. “But could you please get me a cover for this please? I don't want to look at it anymore” Cadance breathed deep.

The medication was stifling. Reetro had insisted on a high dosage which left Cadance feeling dizzy and disorientated most of the time. She found that her magic was getting weaker. She could only teleport a few feet, and objects shaked when she levitated them. She hated it. Her mind was clouded, and she hated it. Even summoning an object a couple rooms away was difficult.

“Sure.” Shining's horn charged again, as he summoned a throw coat for Cadance. He gently placed it on her. “So where do you want to go today?” Shining asked.

“I have a present I need to pick up.” Cadance smiled.

….........................................................................

Cadance and Spark were out in the gardens. heading towards the royal stables. Where Fire Craft the royal blacksmith resided.

“Are you sure about this Princess? It's a very nice idea but.......” Spark faulted.

“Yes I am sure Spark, With Shining becoming commander, Celestia being overwhelmed with work, and me being in the hospital She's been alone for a long time now. I don't want her to be alone anymore.” Cadance stood firm.

“I understand that but.......” Spark seemed conflicted.

“I'm not sure if I'll ever be the same around her again but... I'm going to try. I don't want to hide from her anymore. From what Shining, you and Reaper have told me she's becoming a very strong and abled Mare, She's growing up, and I want to be there to see it.” Cadance stated.

“She has” Spark smiled. “But are you sure? It's not exactly a common thing, and she might be too young to handle it” Spark worried.

“Your right she might be, and this will be quite the challenge, but Twilight is a smart filly, if anypony is going to concur a challenge it will be her” Cadance beamed.

“I understand” Spark conceded.

“Do you know if Fire Craft still has him?” Cadance turned towards Spark.

“I believe so... I've not heard any news of his departure. I must ask though has Celestia agreed to this. I know you do not need her permission but..” Spark was interrupted.

“Yes she has. She agreed that it would be a good idea to give her some company in that lonely tower of hers, under one condition” Cadance's breath hitched.

“Which was?” Sparks interest peaked.

“That I help her train him.” Cadance breathed deep.

“And are you okay with that? You'll have to spend a lot of time with her if you do.” Spark asked worried.

“I am aware, but I want to. I've left her alone for nearly two years. I only saw her three times before I spent eight months in the hospital. I can't do it anymore. As much as the idea of facing her pains me. Staying away from her is worse. I miss her. I miss her laugh, her smile, the way the would get excited when she found a new book, the way the would beg me to read it too her. I miss her too much and it hurts, it hurts me to stay away. It hurts to know she thinks I hate her” Cadance began to cry.

“I understand Princess. Your not alone, we've all been a little different with her since the incident. Just know that we'll support you and help you, both of you.” Spark smiled.

“Thank you spark” Cadance laughed through her tears.

“Ah were here” Spark stated.

They arrived at the royal stables as Cadance and Spark began to wander around. Looking for a certain fire haired coloured pony. Cadance went inside and noticed a lot of well made armour placed on the walls. 'No wonder he's the best' Cadance thought as rumour of his skill were said to be quite legendary throughout the castle.

“Eye Spark, long time no see” Cadance heard a thick voice say just outside the hut.

“Hey Craft. I just wondered if you had a minute to speak?” Spark asked. Cadance began to exit the hut in search of the voice.

“Eye I've always got time for you lass. What can eye help ya with?” Cadance exited the hut to notice a very tall and broad Stallion standing in front of a giant forge. His mane was almost as bright as the fire that burned in front of him, and he was covered in scars galore. She was shocked to see, that that he was missing one of his back legs and a fake one was in it's place instead. He looked up and looked quite shocked to see the Princess at his door. Spark turned and noticed Cadance and turned back to Fire Craft.

“As you can see, the Princess is here to discuss some business with you” Spark said.

“Business? Well this is a surprize. What can ah elp ya with yer highness.” He walked towards Cadance. His leg making a clinking sound with every step.

“I wish to inquire about a baby drake given to you four years ago” Cadance smiled.

….....................................................................

“Are you sure about this?” Shining worried.

“No, but I want to try.” Cadance admitted.

“Okay then, you ready?” Shining asked.

Cadance breathed deep and looked back at the sleeping dragon in the basket on her back. Before turning to the door and nodded.

“Ready” She raised a shaking hoof to the door and knocked three times.

Cadance closed her eyes and breathed shaky breahtes The seconds felt like hours. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7....

The lock clicked.

The door opened.

Author's Note

Hello Filly's and GentalColts sorry for the slow updates however I am trying to upload longer chapters I thank you for you patience

Your Regards

OnTheTrot