The Chaos Within

by NarcissaHeinous

Rating: teen
Tags: Sex, Discord, Slice of Life, Dark, Sad, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2309

A heart-wrenching origin story for Discord, told from his point of view.

All I ever wanted was some respect, did I get want I wanted? Not in the slightest. What I got was a miserable life of torment and misunderstanding. That all changed the day I stood up and used my powers!

Published 2013-03-31 21:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-31 21:20:02 UTC

The Chaos Within

My name is Discord, I am a draconequus, I am also know as the spirit of chaos and disharmony, which I suppose you could say is an accurate description. I was raised by normal ponies.

My parents were both unicorns. My mom was a light green unicorn named Wildfife. You know how Princess Celestia, and Princess Luna have that floating hair that looks like a plasm? In ancient Equestria, that was how all female unicorn hair looked. After I was turned to stone and the princesses came to power, they gave them normal pony hair. I believe this was because when I ruled Equestria, I used my powers to fill unicorn hair with horrible things, like bugs and worms, which would float in the hair. My mom had bright orange hair, and that's how she got her name.
She had a very fiery temper, and her cutie mark was a wild fire.

My dad was gray with grayish blue hair. His name was Hokey Smokes, and his cutie mark was a cloud of smoke. There is a false legend about an evil unicorn named Hokey Smokes who covered Equestria in a cloud of smoke. I was the one who started that rumor, and one of the few who knows for sure it's false.

While I can't confirm what my birth was really like, as neither parent was very honest with me, here is what I believe happened, from what I have collected:

When my mom found out she was pregnant, neither parent wanted a child. She talked about killing herself. Suddenly she became more ill than any pregnant pony ever was.

A fairy came to her, and explained that she had been gifted with a special, immortal, omnipotent chaos creature called a draconequus. Draconequi can't reproduce. They can be born to almost any sentient creature magically. The fairy explained that draconequi need very special care, and should be allowed to let their chaos shine, or they will turn on the parents, become evil, and make the planet they were born on miserable for all.

Did my mom listen? Nope! I believe she said something along the lines of "Yeah right loser! I'm too smart to need listen to anyone else on how to care for my child, fat liar! My child is not a dracona-whatcha-macallit, and she's not special or important. I'll never believe you! Now get out of my life!"

She really should have listened.

As much as I try to deny it, I was raised as a girl.
The reason for this is because draconequi have no true sex organs or private parts. My mom decided this meant she could choose for me to be a girl, and that I would like it. What she didn't know was that draconequi still have genders. You can't tell at birth without a DNA test, but as we grow up we become gendered in our appearances and voices. I am and always was a male. But because my mom thought she could choose my gender, I was forced to live as a girl growing up. As I grew old enough to look and sound male, my mom just assumed I was ugly with a mysteriously masculine voice.

My parents named me Melting Fire. A horrible, horrible name. Yes it was a fire related name like most in our family, but the reason behind it was dreadful. Apparently my mom gave it to me because I looked like a mish-mash of animals fused together after melting appart in a fire. Oddly enough, a common theory in those days for how the first draconequi came to be.

My mom always forced me to be very girly. The worst part of it was, maybe she would have let me be myself. I didn't get to be because when I was very young I thought I was supposed to be a girl. I hated it and wanted to be a boy. But I was lead to believe this was how all girls were supposed to be like. By the time I was old enough to realize this wasn't how all girls were supposed to be, and that I really was meant to be a boy, my mom thought I really liked being like this, and telling the truth would either break her heart or cause her to call me a liar.

As for my powers, my mom never let me use them. I was a teenager when I finally learned to use them. Most draconequi use them much sooner, and they always pick them up very quickly without training. My mom didn't let me use them because she didn't believe they were real. She tried to keep what I was a secret from me. When I finally found out, she admitted it, but tried to convince me that draconequi don't really have any powers. When I was a teenager I found out that was a lie and felt very betrayed.

My childhood seemed like a string of one bad event after another. When I was very young I didn't even realize it was bad. But I learned. When I was just a tiny little thing, and my mom still had me convinced that I was just a very ugly, mutant pony, mom insisted I become a filly scout. She thought it would be a good idea because I was homeschooled. And a chance to make friends, not that I wanted any. Even if I did, I had no idea this was the last chance my mom would ever give me to make friends.

Young filly scouts are called "Cookie Scouts" or "Cookies". The first few times she offered, I thought she wanted to turn me into a cookie and eat me! Even though I never had anyone I would call a friend growing up, I did meet many young fillies my mom tried to make me be friends with. It never worked out. But there were some I would see enough that my mom thought we were friends, and I didn't really mind being around them at times, but I wouldn't call it friendship, and never was there a time when I even saw the same filly more than an average of once a week.

Two fillies I knew for a few years were sisters named Amber Glow and Bubble Mist. Amber Glow was one year older than Bubble Mist. When I first met them, Amber Glow already had her cutie mark, an Amber crystal. But Bubble Mist was still awaiting hers, a large purple bubble she would receive a year later. At the time I still didn't know what I was, and thought I would get a cutie mark too oneday. I believe they, like everyone else, didn't really like me, but tried to get along because our parents were friends at the time.

About a year and a half after we met, they invited me to a summer filly scout event. They probably only invited me because their parents must have insisted they be nice to me. I guess their parents wanted their daughters to be friends with me because they felt bad I was different, and didn't want me to feel left out.

The event had ponies telling stories. But my parents made me leave half way through a story for no reason. There were also ponies passing out crystal rock candy sticks for free to all the children. I asked my mom if I could have one. But she said no and made a rude comment about how I might as well eat sugar out of a bowl with a spoon.

After that I did let my mom have me join filly scouts. I thought she wanted me to be no matter what, but years later I began to doubt that. I was in the troop with Amber Glow and Bubble Mist for one year before it broke up. It wasn't that great, but it was wondrous compared to my next troop. Just as I expected, all the fillies made fun of me for my weird appearance and personality. Also just as I expected, my mom didn't believe me or seem to care. Surprisingly though, I, despite being the youngest, was the brightest in the troop, and made perfect attendance.

That summer after the troop broke up, my mom thought of getting me in my cousin Marmalade's troop. I went on a camping trip with them one weekend. It was clear they didn't want me. By the end of the summer we found the troop I would be in for two years, two horrible years.

I assumed filly scouts was for the nerdier, less feminine fillies. But it was as if the fillies in this troop went out of their way to be the oppisite. They were dumb, super girly, catty, and mean. I was their chew toy, even though this time I was the oldest. Sure a few of them seemed nice enough. But were they? I was the one who got blamed for everything, and always got in trouble. Sure maybe it was sort of my fault sometimes.

But even when it was, whoever told on me stretched the truth, and the leader stretched it further. Many of the fillies behaved HORRIBLY, and never got in trouble. I was actually a few meetings into my third year in this troop when my mom forced me out. Mean fillies made a mess and got the leader to believe I was the only one who could have done it. That was it. Also I was usually one of the few filly scouts to have a parent with me most of the time.

Not long before I joined filly scouts my mom let me keep a pet. I found a magic green fox thing I called Slappy because I thought she looked like a squirrel. For a while my mom helped me take care of her, and all was well. After a couple of years however, she was taken away for almost a year for tests because my mom thought she was infected. She came back around the time I was pulled out of filly scouts, and I had fun with her for almost another two years.

This time she was all my responsibility. I got to walk to the pet park to play with her all the time. As long as I followed one rule. My mom forbid me to talk to anyone at all. Did I listen to her? Nope! I didn't see what harm it would do to chat it up. It was in doing this I learned how good I was at lying and telling secrets. I never made a friend, but I did meet many pet owning ponies with interesting stories to tell.

It wasn't long before I met the closest thing to a friend I had before Fluttershy. Her name was Catmint, she had a chalk white coat, jet black hair, glowing green eyes, and a flame cutie mark. She was three years older than me, and her pet was a magic red cat. She told me magical stories about time travel, warriors, and vampires. It was long after I lost her that I realized it, but I think I may have actually had a crush.

Well talking in the park when I wasn't allowed had to come crashing down someday. It was a summer day, and I was in a bad mood. I now realize my mood swings when I was young probably happened because of holding back on chaos. I started going crazy. Before I knew it I was permanently banned from the pet park, and Slappy was taken away from me.

My mom didn't have to know this though. And she didn't for many years. I was surprisingly good at keeping that secret. Why? Because a while after I got Slappy back that first time, and started going to the park, my mom didn't really pay attention to what I did with Slappy. They let your pets live at the park. And my mom didn't pay attention.

Of course if I was going to keep that secret, I had to pretend to keep going to the park. When I did, I would go out and explore other places near by. I learned so much and my mom never figured it out.

As for me finding out I was a draconequus. A couple months after I was banned from the park. I asked my mom if they was a reason why I still didn't have my cutie mark. She admitted I was a draconequus, but didn't tell me I was omnipotent, immortal, or had any powers. She thought I'd never know. But going out I read a book about draconequi, and found out the truth.

Soon I was a teenager, and my mom decided I should wear makeup, and hoof and claw polish. I hated it, but for a while I pretended to like it. Then when I tried to tell her I didn't she didn't think I meant it. So I went back to pretending I liked it.

After a while the rage my mom put me in over the years caught up to me, and I declared myself evil soon after secretly learning to use my powers. I kept this a secret of course. But I was also very depressed. I wanted to embrace the magical male draconequus I was. I almost committed suicide several times. It was clear my mom didn't care.

Soon enough was enough. I changed my name to Discord, revealed the male I was, told my parents all my secrets, turned them into mice, took over Equestria, and you know the rest. Arrivederci!

The end.

Author's Note

Sorry if the ending seems a bit rushed. I thought it felt like Discord.