Fluttershy gets a Backrub.
Twilight had finished her studies for the afternoon. Spike was already fast asleep, and she was headed to the ground floor of the library to close for the day. Before she could reach the bottom step, the door flew open. A shy, sunshine-colored pegasus ran in, slamming the door behind her. “Twilight! I need your help!”
The purple unicorn ran over to her friend, but before she got too close, Fluttershy jumped into the corner. “Don’t get behind me!”
This was puzzling. What could have stirred her into this frenzy? Was there something wrong with her plot? Was this about her tail extensions? Twilight put a reassuring hoof on Fluttershy’s shoulder. Fluttershy shrieked at the top of her lungs, as if she had stepped on her hoof. “No! NOT the SHOULDERS! Anything but the SHOULDERS!!”
“Whoa! What happened? I’m sorry, but please tell me what’s wrong!”
Fluttershy composed herself. “Oh, Twilight! It’s awful! I got five marriage proposals today! But I don’t know who they’re from because they were all behind me when they said them!”
Twilight jumped back. “How is that possible? Start from the very beginning!”
Sniffling, Fluttershy and sat down on the nearest cushion, being careful to never turn her back to Twilight. “You see, I’d been getting sort of lonely. Not that I don’t have lots of good friends, but I needed some, oh my. How do I put this? I needed some more physical attention… from other ponies. I’m always pushing everypony away and I never get close to them.“
Twilight gave a hesitant “Go on…”
“So I went to Zecora’s cabin in the Everfree Forest. I asked her something to make me more more approachable...”
“If more pony contact you need to have
Just apply this magic sauve.”
“Is that all she said?” puzzled Twilight.
Fluttershy let out a loud sigh. “No. There were a bunch of cryptic warnings as well. But I was too much of a dumb dumb to listen. I got home and before I could open the bottle, Angel Bunny jumped on my back and smushed my saddlebags. The magic potion splashed all over my back!
“I thought maybe it would still work, so I, um, sort of, went over to Sweet Apple Acres. I went looking for Big Mac. He’s such a nice and strong pony--and very handsome. He was chopping firewood as usual. I got up the nerve to talk to him, but he was just busy and didn’t seem to have the time to say two words to me. I turned to leave, but just then he dropped what he was doing and began massaging my shoulders. He had some very strong hooves. It was very relaxing.”
“I thought to myself, ‘Oh, that feels good.’ He continued and began to say nice things to me. He was so charming. Before we knew it, he had asked me out on a date. I was so happy. I
ran off before he could change his mind.
“I ran down the path to Rarity’s to tell her the good news. I was trotting down the street, minding my own business when Pinkie Pie crept up behind me and started giving me a hug! I thought it was just Pinkie being Pinkie, so I didn’t give it much attention. But I should have seen the signs. This was the first time I’d ever seen Pinkie Pie confused by her own actions.
“Then I stopped at Rarity’s boutique for some tea. We had such great conversation. We talked for hours, and I had forgotten all about the incident with Pinkie Pie. But when I turned to leave, Rarity leapt across the table and began massaging my shoulders! Her hooves look so delicate, but she was really rough. I spun around and confronted her, and she stopped. She apologized and said she didn’t know what came over her. It seemed every time I turned, she would leap onto me again.
“I started to get the impression that the potion had made my back the most appealing, irresistible thing in all of Equestria! Sure enough, everpony in town was on my back. Mr. Cake couldn’t keep his hooves off me, and he got the business end of Mrs. Cake’s rolling pin because of it. Ponies would leap through windows just to get at my sweet shoulders. Before long, a crowd had formed behind me! I tried walking backwards, but a new crowd started from the other direction! I had no choice but to run here!”
Fluttershy began to sniffle. Twilight assessed the situation. “And the stuff won’t come off? Have you tried washing it off?”
“I tried to go to the spa for a hot soak, or an exfoaliating cleanser, but they just kept giving me free massages! Over and over! I couldn’t get away until their hooves were too sore to chase me! Isn’t there a spell that can fix this?”
“Zecora did teach me how to make a Balm of Ultimate Removal! It should undo the effects of any topical potions, even those that won’t wash off with water!” Twilight turned to the staircase. It was at that moment that another stampede was heard just outside Twilight’s door. The door, still unlocked, flew open again and this time Applejack jumped in and sealed the door behind her. “Twilight! I need your help!”
Before Twilight could answer, Applejack noticed Fluttershy from the corner of her eye. She shrieked and jumped into the far corner. “Ah! Don’t get behind me!”
Twilight head was swimming. “Applejack! What happened to you?”
Applejack’s panic was replaced with shame. She suddenly became small and told her tale. “I saw how well that potion worked for ol’ Fluttershy when she stopped by this afternoon. I got sorta jealous...”
Twilight had to prod her to continue. “And?”
“Well, ya see I went and got one of those fancy-shmancy potions from Zecora. I was so excited, I got real clumsy. When I got it home, I dropped it, and before I could clean it up I sort of... tripped. And sat in it.”
“Yipes! Wait here! I’ll set up the balm!” Twilight darted out of the room. Fluttershy and Applejack each stood there, facing each other. Their eyes locked and they dare not turn, lest show their backs to the other. Eventually, Applejack broke the silence with indignation. “So, are you really going steady with my brother?”
“Um, well, I’d like to. If it’s not too much trouble...”
Applejack’s stubbornness had picked an unfortunate time to bubble to the surface. “Well, I won’t have it! My brother had been shuffled around by persnickety potions and spells once too often. I won’t have you bewitching my brother and that’s final!” The orange mare put her hoof down and turned her back on her friend.
When Twilight came down the stairs, the damage was done. I cannot describe the things she saw, but I can say she tried to rub the balm in her eyes.
