I Can Haz Skittelz?

by Solace Chaostra

Rating: everyone
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1264

Be careful what you desire, you may face your own trial by fire.

Pinkie. 'Nuff said.

My second story, still working on finding my writing rhythm and style. Tell me what you think!

Published 2013-04-01 06:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-01 06:20:01 UTC

I Can Haz Skittelz?

I Can Haz Skittelz?

She trotted up the small bridge. It felt solid under her hooves, which she almost found peculiar. It was certainly unnatural, and the lack of guard rails on the sides only added to the oddness of it. The bridge itself was not special; it was one of many she found, although she had been brought to this particular one.

She risked a quick peek over the edge. She knew she wouldn’t be able to look long; they were bound to notice, and attempt to stop her. So she settled with shifting just her eyes over to the edge of the bridge. And then she saw it.

There, lying just beyond the ridge of her small platform, was the mystery. The unspoken mixture of the unknown and the common, the rare and the everyday, seen by all and understood by few. It shimmered in the sunlight, and she noted its attempt at conveying its emotion to her. If only she could just reach it…..

She was pressured out of her reverie when she noticed her companions had moved on in front of her. She walked forward, finally crossing the small bridge and leaving behind her small victory, her personal mystery. She began to wonder, to doubt if she should keep going; after all, there were plenty of them here, plenty of chances to take, risks to explore, but that one just seemed so close.

She did not have time to decide, nor, as it turned out, would she have had needed to. She was led to a small impression below her hooves, marked with golden designs, surely to impress upon those who claimed that place as their dwelling the sacredness of the spot. It was not until she decided to look into the impression that she saw.

There it was, again! But it seemed different. Sure, it wasn’t as lively-looking; the first one had a rhythm to keep that assured that. This one seemed to want peace. There was no disturbances to interrupt its solitude, no outside forces to disrupt its natural flow. And yet, here it was, shimmering, shifting, moving, living if one believed hard enough. She could not quite yet believe she was here, that the opportunity had finally come to her. She looked around; she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon by the looks of her company, so she allowed herself to collect her thoughts.

OHMYGOSHICANTBELIEVEIT!Isthisreallyit?Itseemssosmall!Iknowtheyrenotsupposedtobebigatthebeginningbuttheysuredogetbigattheend!Iwonderifitgetsbiggerbyitself?Ormaybe(GASP)maybeitgetsreallybigthenreallysmallthenREAAAALLYbiganditkeepsgoingforeverandforeverandforEEEEVVVEEERRRRRR!ThatwouldbeSOCOOL!IalwayswantedtoseeoneupcloseandnowIfinallygettoseeitupclose!DidIjustsayupclosetwice?IsupposeIdid(GASP)Isaiditthreetimes!That’sgottabeanewrecord!Isuredoalotofgaspingdon’tI?Yousuredo!Whatwasthat?Wasthatme?Ofcourseitwassilly!Youretheonlyonehere!Nuuh!Theotherscanhearme!Areyousure?Ofcourse!Icanheartheirthoughtssowhycanttheyhearmine?YoumakeagoodpointYayIjustmadeagoodpointtomyself!WaitdoesthatmeanIgetitorIalwaysgotit?IguessIgetitgotitgettingitgottingitHeehee!Gottingisntawordsillygoose!Areyousure?Arewereallyarguingagain?Notimeforthatanymore!Lookatwhatisatyourhooves(GASP)ItsstillthereHEY!Youmademegaspagain!Itsnotmyfault!ButyouaremesoIamyouwhoaremewhoisyouwhoaremewhodoohowdydo?Justfinethankyou!Heeheewerhymed!Yay!Nowfocusonthetaskathoof!Okiedokielokie!

All the while she had been simply staring at the impression, not paying much attention to what the leader was telling the others. It was something about something so naturally she ignored it. Her curiosity was piqued at its maximum level, and she decided it was time; time to divert from the objective.

She reached forward, expecting….well, she didn’t really know what to expect. But her hoof was out, and it was barely an inch above the surface of her shimmering wonder. Too late to turn back, she pressed on with all her might, using her curious nature to guide her. She made contact with the surface, only for it to break under the weight of her hoof. She kept on gliding through the shimmering waves of whatever-it-really-was and stopped only when she felt it had been disturbed enough. Seeing it in such a tranquil state, she didn’t want to linger hoof-deep in this thing for very long.

Pulling back, she noticed that she made vibrations along its surface from where her hoof last touched it, but as they died down, new ripples began to form, emanating outward from the center. Seemingly from no source, they reached the outer edge of the impression and died out, only to be quickly replaced by another behind it.

HuhthatsfunnyIdontrememberitdoingthatbeforeThisthingisreallyweirdHEYItsyouagain!HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YesIknowitsmebutitsalsoyouremember?Ohyeah,heehee!Sowhatareyouwaitingfor?DOITButwhatifImnotsupposedto?Youcantgiveupnow!Beconfident!Befearless!BeKumquat?What?ShouldIbekumquat?KumquatkumquatKumquatyourhoof!Huh?Idonthavekumquatonmy(GASP)Itsonmyhoof!!

Sure enough, whatever-it-was that she touched, part of it was now clinging to her hoof. She panicked for a moment, but then decided it was best to make do with what she had. After all, she had come for this, and even though sticking to her hoof was not part of the plan, she had no real reason why this should be forsaken in place of a more complicated plan of action.

So, with a look of pure joy and anticipation on her face, she brought her hoof to her face and studied it but for a moment, then…

She licked it.

Her mission complete, all that was left to do was to determine the results. She pondered the taste for a second, a face of smug accomplishment and victory presiding over her features. She didn’t feel anything at first. But then, things started to get weird….

HmmthisdoesnttastestrangeatallwaitasecondwaitasecondwaitaOHMYGOSHWHATSHAPPENING???

She felt an overwhelming sensation of disgust and bile as the substance burned her insides. She began to throw up, only just holding it back.

ItfeelslikeImgonnaletloosethepartycannonthatisnttheniceone!OhwhydoIfeelsohotandsocoldImseeingmyselfturnblue!

She managed to hold it down, just as another wave of feeling crashed down upon her. This time, it was a tremendous tingling sensation, as if thousands of tiny feathers were tickling her at once, and in one particularly sensitive spot.

Her stomach.

She held back the puke, but failed to stay the nausea that came afterwards. She felt so dizzy and so twisting and turning that she failed to notice the other sensation rising up towards her throat.

OhthisisworsethanthetimeIatethatweekoldstalecupcakethatturnedmeandMrandMrsCakeallsosicklygreeWHATISTHAT???

“That” as she called it, was the feeling she had not expected to come from nausea, but rather one that would lead into nausea. An intense pang of burning torches and Spike’s dragon flame entered her mind as she pictured what she must have looked like. She felt so hot she thought she saw fire come out of her mouth, although it could have just been post-nausea delusions.

HOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTohCOMEONWhatnow???

A fourth splash of emotions swept through her body, but this one was different. It didn’t feel like the others, in fact it didn’t really feel like anything at all. It just held her in place, rooted to the spot. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t speak, she couldn’t call for help or plead to some higher power for it to stop. All she could do was stand there and hope that her suffering would end soon.

However, this fourth effect had something else in mind. It didn’t just hold her in place, it held onto the most recent feeling and kept her feeling it over and over. Unfortunately that feeling was the one of heat. The feeling that caused the most pain, the feeling that she thought was over, was now the feeling she had to endure in statue-like silence for what seemed like forever. And thus her trial by fire began.

Fate, however, was smiling upon her that day. She was released from her static prison after what felt like eternity, and not a moment too soon. She realized that her freedom had come at last, but after what she had been through, all she could do was pant for a breath she had not known she was holding.

Freedom for her poor soul was short lived; her breaths became quicker, shorter, she began to sweat, and her eyes dilated from a mix of shock and pain, as the full experience from the unexpected took its toll upon her soul. As she gasped for air, one word formed in her mind. One word, that made it out of her head and onto her tongue, racing to her lips as it weaved past remnants of fire and pain, nausea and sickness. One word that, although it came out as barely more than a frightened whisper, she screamed at the top of her mental lungs.

“SPIIICEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCBW09kKWd8