To be a tree.

by Reverse Clopper

Rating: mature
Tags: Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Fluttershy, Sex, Big Macintosh, Applejack, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 5587

Fluttershy has been talked into a blind date with a rather quiet stallion. The two ponies who set the date up — as a cruel joke, no less — are in for a surprise.

Fluttershy. Quiet. Shy. Beautiful. Hopelessly so.

She can't stand to bother anyone with her problems, even if one of her problems happens to be an insatiable sexual apetite brought upon by seasonal hormonal changes.

There's good news, though! Her friends, Applejack and Rainbow Dash, have found her a blind date. They say he's a hot stallion, single, and interested in having a good time. Honestly, she'd be happy for a stallion that met just one of those criteria, and the maddening heat between her hindlegs is almost enough for her to force herself on any creature with a working set of male genitals.

Maybe if her friends knew she was in heat, they wouldn't have been so cruel as to select Big Macintosh as her partner.

We're going to follow along, monitoring the progress of Fluttershy's hopeless date, though I don't think we'll be the only ones watching.

Published 2013-04-02 03:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-02 03:00:02 UTC

What She's Always Wanted...

"Remember, Fluttershy. Shoulders back, eyes forward. Remember to make constant eye contact. Stallions love it when you stare right at 'em, that's how they know they've got your full, undivided attention. Turns 'em on, ya know?"

Fluttershy was trying her damnedest to follow the instructions her best friend Rainbow Dash had given her, but it was to no avail — her blind date was getting quieter and quieter by the minute. That was quite a feat, considering he had said all of six words the entire night, five of which were directed towards the waiter. Unsurprisingly, most of them were, 'eeeyup'.

Even though she was doing everything Dash had told her, her obvious advances were garnishing little interest from Big Mac. She had heard rumors around town, mostly during her trips to the spa with Rarity, that the fellow might be a stallion-snuggler, or much worse, that he may be interested in 'keeping things inside the family'. Then again, it was Applejack who had offered him up for the date, so the latter possibility seemed unlikely. Probably just a nasty rumor started by jealous mares. As for the first matter, Fluttershy had no issue with homosexuality. In fact, she rather liked it. Oftentimes she would fantasize that she was a strong, powerful, stallion; mounting another stallion to dominate him with her rock-hard, throbbing—

Fluttershy blinked a few times in rapid succession. "Um... Would you like to have more wine?" She asked, glancing down at the bottle.

"Eeeeenope."

Here I am. Again. Trying to get a stallion drunk enough to go home with me. Plain, boring, ugly, Fluttershy. But he knows what I'm up to. Just like all the others. I'll just have to go home and rub one out. Again. This always went better with Dashie as my wingmare. I always went home with a stallion by my side after I went out with her. She never did, though. That's odd... I had never noticed that before. Hmm...

At that moment, Fluttershy noticed that she had broken the oh-so-important eye contact that Rainbow Dash had insisted upon. Her brilliant sapphire-blue eyes shot back into their Dash-approved orientation, only to grant her a disappointing view of Big Mac's rapidly retreating gaze. What little interest he seemed to be showing dissolved as soon as soon as she had noticed it.

"So... Um... This is pretty good bread, isn't it? I mean... um... If you think so..."

"Eeeyup."

"Um..." Fluttershy squeed bashfully, growing more nervous with each word she uttered, "How's the farm?"

He turned his head to make eye contact with her, his face betraying deep thought, but his jaw clenched, dedicated to his characteristic silence.

Fluttershy idly played with her fork."Did you, um... plant any new trees lately?"

The corners of his mouth dropped. "Eeeeenope." Again, a simple, one-word response, but with hidden emotional undertones. He may not be much of a talker, but at least now Fluttershy had something to grab at; an emotional handle.

"I really like trees... Do you think I could come over to your place after dinner and see some?" she asked, propping her muzzle on her fishnet-adorned hooves. The composure Fluttershy maintained during her heat was nothing short of remarkable, though it probably was more to her disservice than her benefit; most other mares would be so dramatically changed that nopony could possibly miss it, and those mares were granted a heightened level of forgiveness and understanding during their 'time of the year'. In some extreme cases, it was possible for mares charged with rape to be acquitted on the basis of hormone tests. Heat is not a laughing matter.

After taking some time to ponder Fluttershy's request, Big Mac responded with a simple, "Eeenope."

"Aww... Why not?" Fluttershy asked.

"Eeeen-" He lurched uneasily. That answer wouldn't answer the question, but some unknowable force within him drove him to give her some kind of explanation. "N-not tonight... Ah... Ah had plans tonight."

"Plans? But it's so late already... Don't you think it would be better to... come to bed?" She reached out and touched his hoof, which he quickly pulled away.

"P-personal plans..." Big Mac stuttered, as he tensed up.

"Oh, well, how personal? I just might be able to help..." Fluttershy suggested as she struck her sexiest pose, putting her hoof behind her head and flaring her wings in a classic display of pegasus arousal. At least, it was supposed to be sexy. It probably would have gone over better if one wing hadn't gotten caught in her hair, and the other hadn't knocked a candle off the shelf behind her. Aroused, timid, and nervous is not a winning combination.

Big Mac hesitated before responding. "It's not like that..."

"What is it like?"

"N-nothing. You wouldn't understand."

Fluttershy was getting desperate, the burning heat between her legs driving her to pursue carnal relations with reckless abandon. She grabbed Big Mac by his collar and pulled him halfway across the table, yelling into his face, "just tell me what you want! I'll do anything! Is it a stallion waiting for you? I'll do a threesome! I'll even take it in the butt if that's what you want!"

She released him and slammed her hooves on the table, demanding, "just rut me!!"

Big Mac was jostled by the assertive demeanor and overt sexuality suddenly being demonstrated by the mare before him.

"Oh... I... I mean, if you don't mind... Oh dear..." She blushed and squeaked.

Awkward silence. Nothing but awkward silence. It was even more awkward and silent than before. If that was possible.

And then, without warning, something in Big Macintosh just snapped, and he spoke with a hitherto unseen passion. "I just.. I love those trees so damn much, but t'aint no way for me ta show it. All I ever do to 'em is kick 'em! What kind of way is that to treat somethin' ya love? I just wanna hold 'em, and stroke 'em, and show 'em how important they are to me!"

Big Mac's chest heaved, his eyes darted around the room to avoid Fluttershy's penetrating gaze, and the corners of his mouth twitched between a smile and a painful grimace. He had no clue why he just admitted that. Had he been a stallion of weaker constitution, he might have started blubbering on the spot. He was weird, and now Fluttershy knew it. There was no way to take it back, no way to make it seem like a joke, and no retreat. His only hope was that the mare before him would treat him with kindness and withhold judgement.

"I..." Fluttershy began, anxiously. She reached across the table and wrapped her hooves around one of Big Mac's, prompting him to look back up at her. With a lascivious look in her eyes, she finished her statement. "I've always wanted to be a tree..."

And with that sudden realization of their incomprehensibly stupid shared interest, the floodgates of desire burst open. Both ponies practically leapt up out of their seats, their muzzles meeting awkwardly over the candle-lit dinner as their tongues danced wildly in each-other's mouths...

Voyeurs

Behind a one-way mirror, two ponies watched something they never thought would happen in a million years take place before their very eyes.

Rainbow Dash leapt up and threw a triumphant hoof into the air before pointing at Applejack."YES! Ha! Told ya so, you owe me twenty bits!"

"Now wait just a gosh-dern minute, Rainbow, it's obvious Big Mac made the first move!"

"No way! You saw the way Fluttershy was talkin' to him! She was practically beggin' for the D!"

AJ grimaced slightly at her brother being referred to as a source of 'The D', before arguing, "Ah did see it. Right after Big Mac professed his love for 'er. Big lug could hardly look her in the eyes after it."

"That is so, not what he said! Pay up, AJ, a deal's a deal!"

"But—" AJ glanced around, desperate for an excuse, "You and Ah both knew this was impossible! That bet was just a joke!"

"Well, it's happening, so pay up, missy."

"I haven't got that much on me, can I—Holey-moley, what're they doin' now?!"

"Don't try to distract me fro— WOAH!"

Fluttershy left the ground, lifting herself with her wings a bit to lean into the kiss, and one of her hooves knocked over the wine-bottle. Taking it as an invitation, Big Mac swept an arm across the table, knocking everything else onto the floor. He pulled Fluttershy's delicate, hovering, form over the table and against himself firmly. With a quiet moan, their lips separated.

Dazed, confused, and already more sexually gratified than she'd been in months, Fluttershy said the only thing she could think of at that moment. "I'm a pretty apple tree."

That was all Big Macintosh needed to hear. Overwhelmed with passion, he laid Fluttershy down on the table, taking a moment to kiss her front left hoof as he lowered her. While he eyed Fluttershy's perfect, delicate, nether lips, his own genitals were readying themselves for intercourse.

AJ winced and covered her eyes with one hoof. "Ah can't watch this! That's mah brother!"

"Yeah, you go ahead and... don't... watch... Oh damn, he's big..." Rainbow Dash muttered.

"Rainbow!" AJ protested, throwing her hoof across the pegasus' eyes. "You can't be talkin' 'bout mah brother like— Holy cow! That thing is thicker than his leg!"

Dash pulled AJ's arm out of her view, and both ponies stared, mouths agape, at the monstrous member now dangling near Fluttershy's tight, yellow-fuzzed, marehood.

"It's not gonna fit." They both uttered in unison.

Fluttershy had gotten her wits about her, and was now hellbent on making this experience as good as possible for both parties. Tree roleplay. She practically lived for this shit. If only she had known, she would have brought her treesuit...

"Oh, I'm so lonely out here on the apple farm, if only a handsome farmer would come by and... taste my fruit..."

"What'd I ever do to deserve a pretty little tree like you?" Big Mac asked in response, as he brought his mouth down to satisfy the tree's desires. In his mind, the legs draped over his shoulders were not, in fact, legs, but rather, the branches of a beautiful tree. His thick, wet, tongue teased at Fluttershy's most sensitive areas, penetrating her every so often. Fluttershy wouldn't know it, but she smelled and tasted absolutely wonderful. Very sweet, a little salty, maybe a tiny bit of sour, with almost no musk. And, coincidentally, to Big Macintosh's great pleasure... A little like apples.

As a side note, the waiter had come by at that precise moment with their order. Normally, he would insist that such carnal behavior is inappropriate inside a restaurant, but what he had just seen and heard was beyond reasoning. He immediately turned around and left without a single word.

"Hah! Did you see the look on his face?"

"I can't see his face from here, Fluttershy's flank is blocking it."

"No, Ah meant the waiter."

"Waiter?"

Applejack sighed, and sat back on her haunches. "Rainbow, you think maybe we could give 'em a little bit o' privacy?"

"What for?"

"Uh, you know, maybe cuz this is really awkward?" She answered, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh come on. You were perfectly happy to watch her go on a mega-awkward date designed to fail, and now that she's happy you wanna look away? I'm all for practical jokes, but—"

"Why is she standin' like that?"

Fluttershy was balancing on one hoof, her limbs splayed apart like the branches of a tree, shuddering in delight as Big Mac continued to pleasure her.

"See, Rainbow, this is gettin' pretty weird. I don't think she'd be doin' that if she knew somepony was watchin'. What is she doin', anyway? Is that some kinda pegasus thing? Rainbow? Rainbow?"

The prismatic pegasus didn't respond. What she had just realized was too shocking to say.

"Raaaiiinbow... Rainbow. Hey! Look, Twailight's bendin' over!" AJ waved a hoof in front of her friend's eyes, to no avail.

Okay, there was no other option. She was going to have to do something totally inappropriate to get her attention.

"PFFFttt! No! Stop! Bahahahaha!" AJ's hooves ran mercilessly across Rainbow's belly, tickling her friend out of a coma. "No! Come on, AJ, you promised not to— AHAHAHAHAHA!! No! Stop! They're— Pff— gonna —haha— hear me!"

Rainbow pushed AJ away with some considerable force, and gasped for air as she complained, "Not cool! You know how much I hate getting tickled!"

"Sorry, Ah had to, you were totally out of it. Count yourself lucky Ah didn't touch yer hooves. So what's got ya spooked? What's Fluttershy doin'?"

"She's..." Rainbow chuckled awkwardly, "...posing as a tree."

"Ha, no, really."

"I'm serious."

"A tree?"

"And Big Mac seems to be into it... Really into it."

"There's no way that's what she's doin'."

"I swear! She's a um... what's the word... a 'leafer'. There's a bunch of 'em up in Manehatten. They dress up in tree suits and have big conventions and stuff. Some of 'em are into it sexually... And, uh... Fluttershy..." Rainbow glanced over to Fluttershy, who was still emulating a tree and enjoying herself quite thoroughly.

"Ah didn't even know that was a thing..."

"I was surprised too. But apparently some ponies really get off on that stuff."

"That's just buckin' weird."

"Well, I'm all for ponies doing whatever makes them happy in the privacy of their own bedrooms..."

"Yeah, but Rainbow, Ah mean... Don't you think this is a little much?"

"I've seen weirder stuff. Remember that jelly show?"

AJ's eyes shot open, and her body stiffened. "Don't you talk about that, Rainbow."

A cheeky smirk crept up on Rainbow Dash's face."...That stallion who climbed into the giant jar of jelly..."

"Rainbow, I swear to Celestia, if you don't shut your mouth..."

"And then he started to put it in his—"

AJ raised a hoof threateningly, prompting Dashie to stick out her tongue. "Ah'm never lettin' you drag me to another stallion show for as long as Ah live!"

"Oh, come on, that was hilarious!"

"T'ain't nothin' funny about what that stallion was doin'."

"Eh, as cool as you are to hang out with, you wouldn't know funny if it pinched your lip. Pinkie would've totally appreciated that."

"Whatever..."

Yay~

"Oh, farmer-colt..." Fluttershy whispered seductively, "you treated my petals just beautifully, but now I'm in full bloom, and I need somepony to... pollinate me."

"Are you sure your stigma is ready for this stamen?" Big Mac asked, gesturing towards his massive endowment.

"Oh, it was blossomed ready," she purred, retiring to the floor, lying on her back and leaving her hind-legs spread apart.

Big Mac descended upon her rapaciously, pressing the flared tip of his 'stamen' against her 'petals,' slowly grinding his genitals against hers in a most unusual floro-erotic dry-hump.

"Oh, please yes," Fluttershy begged, convulsing in ecstasy as her mind was wracked with the heightened sexual sensitivity that accompanies heat. "I want you inside me!"

Big Mac, ever the slow, careful, and generous lover, was not about to comply, and instead continued to grind against her. Very slowly up along her tender vulval folds until his testicles gently bumped her crotch, and then back down, down, slowly, slowly, mind-numbingly slowly, until nothing but the very tip was touching her lips, at which point he would gently press his mass against her, just teasing the entrance. All the while, copious amounts of his pre-cum drizzled out onto her belly and rapidly moistening slit. He was familiar enough with the mechanics of this scenario to know that he wasn't going to fit outright without a lot of careful— no— wait—

"Put your pollen in my pistil!" She demanded, wrapping her back legs around him at the end of one of his reverse strokes and squeezing with all her strength while pushing herself against him with her wings. Half of the length of his member was forced into her vagina in an instant. Fluttershy's virginal tightness conflicted with Big Mac's massive girth, causing both ponies to scream in a mixture of agony and pleasure. Their lubricating fluids mixed inside her and sprayed out through the almost air-tight seal their genitals formed together, forming a fine mist of pheromones.

"F-F-Fluttershy... Ah-Ahre you okay?"

"Don't stop," she insisted, squeezing a little more, so that the tip of his penis pressed hard against the flesh of her uterus. Even with Fluttershy bottomed out, Big Mac still had at least three more inches to offer.

Taking note of her apparent sexual appetite, Big Mac began thrusting in and out of her quickly and forcefully. Normally, he wouldn't put so much power into it, but the pegasus was literally demanding to be brutalized. "OH CELESTIA YES! Ne-eh-eh-eh-ever st-ah-ah-ah-ah-ahp!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. Her soft belly bounced back and forth in time with Big Mac's thrusting, and she squeaked rhythmically. Big Mac was too big for her petite frame to handle, but in her current state of mind, the one thing she craved more than anything was the feeling of being filled up— of having a stallion stretching her and filling her with his seed, and Big Mac was just the pony to provide that feeling.

"Did that seriously just happen?"

"Ah don't even... Can we pretend we didn't see this?"

"Uh, no way! This is awesome!"

"Ah just..."

"I didn't even think that was equinely possible!"

"'Course it is— Ain't you ever seen a foal bein' born?"

"That's different, though, I mean..."

"How's it different? Comin' out, goin' in..."

"I guess you'd have to... It's just, Fluttershy's toys are..."

"Now you two are sharin' unmentionables?"

"No! Not sharing... Just... You know... Discussing... I mean... We've known each other forever! We kinda learned about this stuff together... So we've never really been uncomfortable talking about it."

"So, uh... This isn't really the size she usually goes for?"

"Not really... She usually uses things that are more... medium or smallish... More about hitting certain spots than splitting herself in half."

"Uh-huh..." Applejack groaned, simultaneously filled with pride and disgust as she realized her brother was having no trouble doing both at once.

"It looks like he's really good at that... I wouldn't expect a quiet guy like him to get around that much."

"He doesn't... Or, at least, not as far as Ah know. Ah don't even think he's seein' anypony. And if he was... Well this isn't exactly okay then, is it?"

"It's fine, lotsa' stallions do more than one mare. If there aren't enough to go around... Sharing is caring, right?"

"Idunno, it's just... I guess that's just not how Ma' and Pa' taught us to be."

"Yeah, I guess country guys do do things a little differently. But just imagine one mare getting that whole thing to herself. I think everypony in Ponyville should get a piece of that... and I'm first in line." Rainbow commented, licking her lips in apprehension.

"Okay, first off, Rainbow, gross. That's still my brother in there and I don't wanna hear that from you. Second of all, no you sure as Tartarus are not. You're just about the last pony I'd expect to go for that."

"What in the hay is that supposed to mean? You callin' me gay?"

"Uh... No. Ah wasn't sayin' that."

"Good. I don't even know why you'd bring that up. Because I'm not."

Applejack's eyelids drooped. "Ye'r right, it's totally ridiculous for anypony to suggest that. It'd be especially ridiculous if you just brought it up out of nowhere."

"Seriously though, I'd be on that like Pinkie on a chocolate dildo."

"Right. You'd fit all ah that in here," she remarked with a punctual poke of her hoof into Rainbow's tight marehood.

"GAHHAH! Hey!" She shot around quickly, "Don't touch me there!"

"Don't worry, I won't make that mistake again," AJ remarked, shaking moisture off her hoof. "You really are an animal, Rainbow. You gotta show more self-control than that."

"Oh, as if you don't get excited every once in a while."

"Not that excited, Boy howdy, I'm gonna have to get a full-blown hooficure before I'll feel comfortable touchin' anything with this hoof." She added, scraping it across the floor in an attempt to rub off Rainbow's secretions.

"Hey, if I was really excited, you'd know." Rainbow Dash insisted, demonstrating her meaning by flaring her wings. "We pegassi just don't waste any time mating. Everything's ready on a moment's notice."

"Heh... 'Don't waste time.' Is that what they call wrapping up in ten seconds flat and then turning into a shivering mess of a pony afterwards?"

"I don't see what's so great about taking all damn day."

From the other side of the glass, Fluttershy was repeatedly uttering, "Yay. Yay. Yay. Yay. Yay! YAY! YAY!! yay~"

AJ smirked. "Ah reckon it might have something to do with that."

"All the more reason it's great to be able to get off quick. Imagine finishing every fifteen seconds while—"

"CELESTIA-DAMNED MOTHERFUCKING YAY!!"

"...while your stallion pounds away for fifteen minutes!"

"Ah guess that could be nice..."

"Could be?! Heh, you're just stuck on the wrong side of that deal. Bet you wish you were a pegasus now, huh?"

"Nah, Ah think I like buildin' up to it real slow. Ya'll can rush if you want to, Ah'm gonna enjoy myself."

"Whatever... Man, they have been at this for a while now..."

"It uh... takes him a while."

"What?"

"Well, you know... It gets lonely on the farm... sometimes..."

"So... you and him do actually..."

"Whu... N-NO! Rainbow, gross!"

"What? You said it..."

"No! We don't... do that... Ah just— He just... Ah hear him. It's... It's not that Ah even pay that close of attention, it's just... It's just awful quiet late at night, and his room is right next to mine..."

"Awkward..."

"Used to be Ah could just put a pillow over my head and not think about it... But now that I know he's thinkin' about... trees... Oh Celestia, why did we think this was a good idea?"

A calm, soothing voice startled the two ponies, "It was a great idea."

"Princess Celestia!?"

"Buh— Uh— Princess! Ah can explain!"

"No need, I think you're all learning a lot about friendship. And I am too. Ooh. MMmmm. Has your brother ever thought about becoming a Royal Guard?"

"Ah... Don't you... But..."

A strand of drool dripped from the corner of Celestia's mouth as she continued to watch Big Macintosh ravish Fluttershy, copious amounts of fluids dripping and spraying from the pegasus' genitals on each inward thrust.

"Oh, wow... I've never seen it this close before... It's bigger than I imagined..."

"So, uh... What brings you here, Princess?"

"I'm here to investigate the sudden influx of reports of public indecency coming from this restaurant," she replied, a soft glow appearing around her horn.

"You're the first responder to public indecency reports?"

"The Guard forwards all of those reports through my desk. I need to verify that each and every case is personally taken care of by my hooves. My hooves and my hooves alone. All the way up to the wrist."

Rainbow Dash and AJ exchanged uncertain glances.

"I should ask you two the same question. What are you doing here?"

"Oh, uh... Well this isn't exactly what we thought was going to happen."

"Uh huh," the princess replied, releasing some oily liquid from her magical aura onto a bag of popcorn that she had just conjured.

"You see, we uh... We kinda set up this date as a practical joke. You know... two shy ponies, really awkward night, everybody has a couple laughs... No real harm done, right?"

"I see." She took a big bite of popcorn. "MMhmm. MMmmmmph. Oh yesh. Go on..."

"But things just sort of got out of control. We didn't know what to—"

"Ohhhh~ Mmmmmm..."

"You okay, princess?" Rainbow Dash asked, noting that her horn was glowing again. It wasn't long before she and AJ traced Celestia's line of sight and found the other end of the spell.

A wavering blob of magic hovered near the coital ponies' genitals, collecting some of the fluids being ejected into the air. After a short time, it zipped away, reappeared in the room, and emptied itself onto Celestia's popcorn.

AJ and Rainbow Dash stared in disbelief as Celestia levitated another heaping pile of popcorn into her mouth.

"What? Dey were waysh-ting it." She spoke through her food before swallowing, still staring intently at the sexual display.

Rainbow giggled. Applejack vomited.

"Oh, grow up... Apple... pony." Celestia teased, still not taking her eyes off the candid erotic exhibition before her.

"Y-You don't know mah name?"

"Why would I know a background pony's name?"

"Ah am NOT a background pony!"

"You don't even have your own song!"

"Yeah Ah did! 'Member? 'Raise this barn, raise this barn, one two three four...' "

"I can't say I remember that. It doesn't sound very impressive." Celestia replied, taking another bite of popcorn. "What kind of shitty lyrics are those, anyway?"

"The ones that inspahre a bunch of friends to pitch in with free manual labor."

Celestia's eyes narrowed as she swallowed another bite of Fluttered popcorn. "Perhaps you have learned more about friendship than I thought."

"Nah, I already knew how to do that. Didn't need Twilight or anypony to teach me. She can suck mah flankhole."

"Can I watch?"

"Ew... Sick!"

"You're a riot, princess!" Rainbow Dash said, offering a congratulatory wing-slap, which the princess happily accepted.

"Anyway, it looks like you two have this under control, so I'll leave you to break it up yourselves." Celestia said as she screwed the lid onto a jar, adding it to a stack of about ten other jars, all full to the top with viscous milky-white liquid.

AJ's eyes shot wide with disgust. "Is that—"

"Oh, would you look at the time? I'm on break now. Bye!" Celestia interjected before vanishing along with the jars in a flash of magic.

"Well... now what?"

"Now, AJ... We watch. Until this ends."

"But the princess just told us to—"

"You wanna go out there?"

"Nope.

"Me neither."

A Happy Ending

Both ponies blinked slowly as they took in the sight of Big Mac continuing to pound Fluttershy. Every single pony present had lost track of the number of orgasms Fluttershy had had. Especially Fluttershy. Over the last thirty minutes, almost every part of her body and brain had temporarily stopped functioning. At that moment, she was capable of little more than being fucked, with only a small semblance of awareness that it was still happening. She had achieved a state of total transcendence, or, at least, the closest thing possible without moving into a monastery and meditating for ten years straight.

Finally, Big Macintosh began to falter— his body shook, he lost his coordination, and sweat poured from his face. He changed his motions, holding back his orgasm until the last possible moment, and then pulled out. Breathing heavily, he fell back on his haunches and took his hooves to his penis, hoping desperately to achieve release. It was actually just long enough that he could get the tip into his mouth; a godsend, considering how hard it is to clop with hooves alone, but he would never do that in front of a mare. It just seemed wrong. He worked himself faster and faster as he felt his satisfaction slipping away, seemingly unattainable...

He was desperate. He so wanted to finish... Maybe if he hurried, he could suck himself off before Fluttershy came to. She wouldn't even have to know. Just as he was about to bring his own mouth down to finish the job, his lips were met by those of an angel. Fluttershy gave him a quick kiss before pushing him back and putting her mouth down around the tip of his penis, stroking the shaft gently with her hooves and wings as she took him back to the place he had brought her so many times. Her pussy was sore, the entire rest of her body was numb, and she had only partially mentally recovered from her sexually-induced coma, but she wasn't about to let him go unrewarded for the incredibly generous loving he had just given her.

Rainbow Dash eyed her friend suspiciously. "You aren't thinking of taking advantage of me in this closed room are you?"

"Rainbow, what in tarnation are you talking about?"

"I mean, if you did something to me in here, nopony would probably ever find out about it or believe me. You could probably pin me down... And use me..."

"What're... Ugh, Rainbow, you don't have to worry about anything like that. I don't want to do nothin' like that to you."

"Good. Good." Rainbow replied, scratching the floor with her hoof.

"Good." Applejack affirmed. She wasn't sure if it was harder to look at Rainbow squirm under the pressure of denying her sexuality, or at her brother being thoroughly satisfied by a mare that he was imagining was a tree.

"But you can admit that you totally would. Everypony wants to be with me, I know it. Even mares get a free 'not-gay' pass when they think I'm hot."

"That's fine, Rainbow."

"Like, sometimes I fantasize about having sex with myself. Totally not gay."

"That... doesn't surprise me at all, actually."

Fluttershy's mouth could barely contain the girth of his penis, and she could hardly manage to down a third of its length without choking, but what she could do was more than enough to satisfy the earth pony. In a matter of minutes, he had been brought to orgasm, and blew a massive load inside her mouth, large portions of it spilling out of her lips or pouring down her throat with nowhere else to go. She retreated, eyes wide, and sneezed the most adorable, kitten-like sneeze you could imagine.

Also, some of Big Mac's cum sprayed out of her nose. In true Fluttershy fashion, she still managed to be completely adorable the entire time, despite the trails of ejaculate running down from her nostrils.

"And, like, it's not even gay when I imagine I'm Twilight, because, like... Even if I'm Twilight, I'm still having sex with me, and that's not gay. It's just masturbation. Duh."

"Okay, that surprises me a little."

"I mean... But... it's not gay, right?"

"Sure, Rainbow. Whatever you say."

"Cool!"

After wiping most of Big Mac's secretions from her face, Fluttershy simply collapsed on top of his prone form. She could feel his heart beating in his chest, which slowly heaved up and down as he caught his breath.

A few moments passed, and then Big Mac shifted his head to look down while Fluttershy glanced upwards. When their eyes met, the both smiled warmly before saying in unison, "Eeyup." Both ponies broke out into mirthful laughter as they wrapped their hooves around one-another.

"And it's the same with Daring Do, too. It'd be gay if I imagined I was having sex with her, but as long as I imagine I'm her having sex with me, it's totally fine."

Applejack sighed in frustration. Part of her hoped that Rainbow would never come to terms with her feelings, lest Twilight be exposed to this self-pandering drivel for the rest of Rainbow's natural life. Another part just wanted Rainbow to shut up, no matter the cost.

"You know, sugarcube, there's nothing wrong with two mares having a relationship with each other."

"AJ... Honey... I'm flattered, but I already told you I don't like mares like that. Tough luck, kid."

"No, Rainbow— I— Ugh... Twilight... Oh, nevermind."

"You like Twilight?! That egghead? What's wrong with you?"

"Heck no! I reckon there's only one unicorn I ever loved... Broke mah heart..."

"Then why'd you even bring that bookworm up?"

"Rainbow... I'm not really at liberty to explain it, but I gotta say, you are not a very bright pony if I have to."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"You and Twilight..."

"Yeah?"

"Well, Ah reckon you both..."

"Yeah?"

AJ let out a deep sigh and rubbed her temple with her hoof. "Never mind."

"We both what?"

"Ye'r not ready for it. Ah said never mind."

"You can't just lead up to something like that, and—" Rainbow Dash found her complaint cut short by AJ's right front hoof jammed into her mouth.

"Shh, shhh... Rainbow, look." In the next room, Fluttershy and Big Macintosh were sleeping soundly in each other's arms. While enjoying the sweet sight of the two lovers sharing their warmth on the cold restaurant floor, Rainbow began idly suckling on AJ's hoof, which had a flavor she found to be strangely delightful. "Uh— EW! RAINBOW!"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"You really are a perv, Rainbow Dash."

"No! It wasn't like that! It just tasted really good for some reason— I didn't even know what I was doing!"

"Wait... You don't realize why..." AJ trailed off, looking at the hoof that had poked Rainbow's wet pussy not even a half an hour ago. She chuckled softly. "Alright, sorry I called you a perv, ye'r just... a little naive, is all. Now, let's get outa here before those two wake up."

"Right."

"Oh, and Rainbow..."

"Yeah?"

"Next time we go out together, I'm pickin' what we're doin'."