The remnants

Fourteen piles of ash littered the ground, the breeze gently blowing them away. It’s sad, I had to be the one to lay waste to them. Not like I enjoy it, I have to do it, it’s orders and if I don’t follow… well… I’m not entirely sure what the consequence is but I’m not one to question the rules. I don’t thoroughly enjoy this job, if anything it took my old life away. I barely remember anything before that day. That day everything was taken from me and I was dragged into this fight, this war.

This war has been going on for thirty-something years. I’ve been “doing my duty” and “doing my part” for around seven years of it. I never wanted to be here, I was in the draft. I was going to school, but I was brought into this mix up of bullets and blood. Those bleak past seven years I’ve been stuck underground, waiting for the enemy to trot over us and take us over. For those seven years I’ve missed the sun, it’s been years since I’ve seen it. Same with the moon, I’ve missed the sight of them both. I can’t wait till I can leave this hole in the ground and go back home.

We’re stationed in an underground cavern, inside housing a colony of about one hundred and fifty civilians. All living with this unclear-clouded vision of a better tomorrow past this hurdle, but all of us, the soldiers, know this war will kill us all. Celestia save us-if she can before we all decide to kill ourselves.

The cavern was quiet, low whistling from the entrance almost a half mile ahead of me, echoing through the twist and switchbacks from the enclosed labyrinth Behind me was a giant metal door, outlandish, huge. Pieces of metal plates and bolts strung together trying to hold the hunk of metal together. It was worn from Celestia knows what. I spent many hours a day re-enforcing it so it would function properly.

I was on guard duty, which means for three to four hours a day I had to stay by this door with this gun and “terminate” anypony who tried to get near that wasn’t one of our guys. I think it’s for a good reason, farther down the cavern I had posted signs. If you can’t read or follow simple directions what good are you?

For the hours I spent here, in front of this gate I remembered better times. Back when this war had never affected me, but that was when I was a young little colt. I always dreamed of being a writer, it was something I always wanted to do. I wrote stories all the time. My friends that I don’t remember back in Canterlot used to say there wasn’t a day I didn’t have a quill in hoof writing something. Those were better times. Better times for all of us. Now I’m here, waiting for another casualty created by me. I felt sick for doing it, I felt like a monster. I was just a grunt with a gun though, it’s my job, I have to do it-not like I want to-but it has to be done.

A gentle breeze blew in from the far off mouth of the cave. The smell of ash and charred wood filled my helmet with those sweet thick smells. They weren’t sweet to the senses but to my mind, the little tricks it played on it. It felt good to think of what the outside may look like, good or bad, it’s still just the though of what it’ll be like out there was fairly exciting.

The guys said to take up smoking, or drinking, or any kind of drug they fell into. I never saw the point in it; if you’re not happy with yourself do something about it. Don’t waste your time with needles and cigarettes. They said it’ll “remind me of home,” bull shit like that. I always considered writing to be my drug, when I wasn’t working the bench I was writing in my room. My usual stories were of ponies climbing to great heights just to fall to the inevitable hell that awaits them at the cliff. It’s sad but that’s what happens, the good that prosper get a bullet in the brain and the bad are the ones who pulled the trigger. That’s how the world turns though.

A great silence I just recognized hung in the air. Silence was good, it meant nothing was happening, but also it was ominous in a way. I never saw it as that though. Silence was good, it made me reminisce, made me think. I liked to have my thoughts to myself. It was calming, serene.

The silence was broken though by a metallic screech. The door behind me was grinding along rusted wheels to the left inching past slowly. Standing inside another stallion stood looking out into the cave from the giant door, the red eyes of his helmet glowing dimly. His voice sounded like static, broken up slightly by the suits microphone inside his helm.

“Kssshh… Crimson, you’re Kssshshift’s up. Ksssh.” His voice echoed.

I walked over to him and tapped his helmet lightly.

“Your internal mic is damaged, hit me up later in the bench so I can fix it up.” He nodded and proceeded past me into the cave.

I walked in and a cool chill ran down my spine and enveloped my armor in a cold wrap of ice almost. The door opened into another big steel door, not as big and outlandish as the outer one but still impressive. A panel was suspended on one of the short square walls. A green button and some smaller blue ones. I went over and pushed the blue button. Circling orange lights spun around the entrance. The sound of air pressure being released sounded its typical high-pitched shriek before the door slammed shut. The door’s locks hummed and spun behind the masses of metal spun together to for it. A long pause hung before the bolts and gears settled with little crackling noises.

The panel’s big green button no longer glowed but in its place a smaller deep blue colored button lit up. I pressed my hoof against it and a feminine robotic voice spoke.

“Decontamination process initiated. Please lock on air filters or securely enforce helmet now.” The voice commanded. I felt around the side of my helmet for the button that locked my helmet so it was airtight. I pressed it and with the decompressing sound the helmet sealed shut. My vision out the helmet shutter, or eyes whichever you prefer to call them, was reduced to blank white. After a few seconds the voice came back on.

“Decontamination complete, have a nice day.”

Ending on that the smaller door slid open, quicker than the outer one but not by much. I pulled my helmet and took a deep breathe and balanced the metal mask between my shoulder blades. A dim cobalt blue light emanated from inside the door. It opened to a big oval room the blue light reflecting off the walls. Rust spots painted the walls in a few spots and some lights were out leaving some dark sections in the room. White benches sat against some walls and small personnel doors were to the far left and right. One labeled “civilian wing” the other “Military Personnel Wing”.  Guess which door I’m going in?

I walked over to the door labeled “Military Personnel Wing,” next to it was a panel with a single button on it and a scanner. Every soldier is given a barcode to gain access to these civilian restricted areas. I pulled the metal cuff covering my hoof; a barcode ran along the front of it. I place it under the scanner. This was tedious, I hated this job and it pissed me off that no one ever asked me what my opinions were. Whether I wanted to fight or not, what side I was fighting for. I was pulled from my life and thrown into this shitstorm. But that’s war, there’s nothing I could have done.

I remember the day they took me away from it, my life, my dream. I lived back in Canterlot. I was going to school there. “Canterlot Academy of the Arts.” I was studying to be a writer. I wanted to write novels that people would actually take time to read, I still believe with a good book the weight of these desperate times would ease up. I remember that fall day, it was my first year and I had been going there for about three weeks. I was packed to go to class, I had money so I could go to that little café down the street, I had my journal for writing some ideas down whenever I got them. I opened the door that fateful morning.

Two soldiers decked in full combat armor stood at the door. I knew what they were there for. I remember falling, my frame was crippled, I couldn’t move. I sat there taking in the situation. This was a death sentence. I started to cry a bit, one of the troops took his helmet off and touched my shoulder. I remember him saying, “You won’t even be here that long, the war is bound to be over soon.” I remember my little outbreak that landed me a parole officer.  The troops are oblivious, they still are. Thinking they’re fighting for a good cause? They’re stupid, they don’t know that no one wins a war like this. Everypony will die in the end.

The hallways were bleak and grey with low humming pale green lights lighting the way down it’s dim corridors. The sweet wretched scent of lemon soap irradiated from he floor and floated to the ceiling leaving its chalky aroma suspended in the air. Down the hallways the smell of food broke the trace of that putrid lemony odor. Echoes of voices trailed off from down the metal halls, it was still quiet though, just quiet enough at least.

The thought of food trailed into my mind. At the thought of it made my stomach churn and moan. It had been hours since I’ve eaten and some food sounded great right now. Up ahead there was a fork in the road splitting off into two directions. A sign was lit up black font placed in front of a yellow light that shone brightly separating the two pathways. “Mess Hall, Medical Ward, Armory- Right.” bellow that sign read another; “Living Quarters, Supplies, Reck-Room, The Bench- left.” The bench was the engineer and mechanics worked, I was the only one who was an engineer and mechanic that was stationed here. I turned right diving deeper into the invisible fog that held that beautiful smell.

Up ahead a bright light shone through the hallway, the white glare from the opening lit up a small part of the floor that lay at the fine aperture. Along the wall a green light had an iridescent glow that showed dimly through the white light in the hallway. Approaching the light the smell was vivid and loomed in an addicting passion that enveloped the senses.

The doorway opened into a brightly lit white room. The bright lights that had been placed in the flooring illuminated the room with a sharp piercing light that reflected off the walls that met the eye with a burning intensity. The light bombarding my eyes strained my perception. I had to pause while my eyes adjusted to the new bright environment. Strung up along each wall were big propaganda posters, big and over exaggerated. “Your hooves can build a better tomorrow,” one says, “Celestia needs you to fight for the people,” another reads, then the one that makes me laugh each time; “Join the army, see the world.” What a bunch of bullshit that is. I’ve been stuck in a hole for 7 years and I haven’t seen daylight since that day so many years ago.

Inside six long tables sat horizontal to the exit/entrance. In the beginning we were expecting more soldiers, like forty or fifty. Now there are nine keeping around three hundred civilians safe. Outside is a war; no metaphor or joke, twenty miles west is the frontline. The eight here were the only ones to hold back a whole battalion, an army even, from coming in here and killing everyone. Notice how I said, “Hold back”? Yeah, none of us are experienced enough to hold off a squad let lone an army. We’re fucked here six ways to Sunday, we’re just waiting for the whole cave to shake with their marching hooves just to blow down our doors.

I know the stallions here, four would surrender becoming POWs, four of them would die fighting, and the only stallion I actually befriended and I would probably run for our lives. Strip our armor off, take some food and two gas masks and bolt for the nearest town. A part of me wants it to happen, but that’s just the feeling to escape I’ve adopted.

That friend of mine is one I met when I first arrived here. His name’s Blue mist, weird since I’m Crimson and he’s blue, he’s a blue pegasus if you hadn't guessed that already, from Cloudsdale, before the whole rainbow factory incident. He was drafted like me, but had just gotten out of flight school. He had his whole life ahead of him but it was cut short by this-this war. He wanted to cook. He had this big dream to become a royal chef and prepare food for the “fair Celestia” and the “Majestic Luna”. Hehe, he liked her. I remember he said back in his room he had posters of her an all of his walls. This war though divided that throne between Celestia and Luna and now, now we’re out here settling their war with our lives. It’s sad, but when or if we escape, I want to find him after this is over and have dinner with him, not in that way though, as friends.

I walked to the small huddle of soldiers, I think I miss counted; there are ten at the table not eight. I sat down at the far corner of the table outside of the clique of soldiers. They were talking, keeping the silence out of sight and out of mind. I tuned them out best I could and listened to the metallic warm hum from the lights and the vents, I was spacing out a little bit.

“Crimson!” someone called out breaking my trance. I looked over to the table with an attentive stare.

“What?” I asked quietly.

A big grey pegasii by the name of Smoke Screen motioned over to the commander, Silver. Silver was a hot shot, a real sparkly bastard. He had one of those douchey personalities you can’t stand, seriously! I hate his fucking guts. He’s a bright sparkly silver fucker with a jet-black mane, his breastplate decorated with medals that you don’t even need to work hard to get. I try to avoid him best I can.

“Crimson,” he said getting up from the table and trotting over to me in his typical pompous manner.

“Now that you’re here I’ve got some news.” He said sticking his chest out best he could.

Despite how big and tough he seemed he was short, very short, I think I’m taller than he is, I’ve never wanted to get close enough to him to check. He got close next to me and put a hoof around my shoulder.

“One is a high ranking officer that will be second in command around here.” He said addressing somepony who was new around the group of faces. Except, I couldn’t see his face, it was covered by a face wrap from his armor. A hood attached to a long parka like cloak shielded his mane. What stood out were his eyes, those dull green eyes. They were completely void of life as he looked up at Silver and nodded. They had no shine, blank almost.

“His name is Headstone, he’s from the frontline. So far he is the most experienced on the battlefront.” Silver made his first round around the table,

“I expect you all to show him your gratitude for risking his life on the front lines.” Everyone, almost in unison, rolled their eyes and sighed.

“The other,” he said walking behind an unfamiliar white-coated stallion with a grey mane containing black streaks in between, he was toward the small side.

“He’s a new recruit, Starblazer.” Silver said placing a hoof on his head.

Starblazer, I'm guessing, lowered his head and blushed a little. His face was kinda disappointed looking.

“This new little runt comes from Canterlot boys.” He said shaking his head and then letting it go and continued on his route around the table.

“Unfortunately he does not hail under my power,” Damn, he’s such an asshole.

“He is directly commanded be you.” He finished pointing a hoof at me.

“It’s your job to take care of him, he bunks with you, he eats with you, he works with you.” As Silver turned his back I boiled over.

“No,” I said standing up. Silver spun around and with some shock withdrew.

“Excuse me?” he said, sounding really pissed.

“Was that a question? Crimson?” I shook my head.

“No it was not but I don’t give a rat’s ass!” I said. Silver slammed his hoof on the table shaking it a bit.

“What was that? I didn’t give you an option, you will take him and you better like it.”

At that point I got into his face.

“I was forced to come here, I was forced out of my life, I was forced into this war, you are not going to force another thing into my life!” Silver stepped back and exhaled.

“Crimson,” his eyes darted at me, the blue piercing like knives.

“You remember that talk we had about a month ago?” Oh shit, he’s gonna pull that card.

“I am the only thing standing between you and a one way ticket to the frontline.” I stepped back and sat back down. He trotted over to me calmly.

“If you ever want hopes of going back to your old life you better follow your orders or the parole officer will here about this.” He leaned in close into my ears, so close I could feel the fur around his muzzle in my ear and he whispered.

“Then you will never go back to where you were.” I snapped, I could feel my blood boiling. He backed up smugly. Now he was at the perfect angle. I slammed my hooves on the table and lifted my whole body up and with all the hatred I built up I slammed my hind legs with the most powerful buck I’ve ever preformed right into his face.

As I made contact with his cheek cracking sounded all the way up his face, his body flying towards another set of tables and benches. He lay there on top of a mesh of tables and chairs. He coughed and spat up some blood onto the floor wiping the residual blood-saliva from his muzzle. He was not happy I could tell. He rubbed his jaw as he rose to three hooves, his mouth hung slack jawed.

“Well,” he said placing the fourth hoof on the floor.

“Now that you’ve broken my jaw and the whole side of my face are you good now?” He said calmly.

He lifted his hoof up and rubbed it again.

“I’ll give you points Crimson, that was a good shot.” Another stallion rushed to his side with some ice but Silver raised his hoof and he sat back down.

“I do think credit should be credited when it is deserved and that strike was good.” He said.

I’m confused, I expected him to lash at me back. He didn’t and that’s what’s scaring me.

“Look, Silver-“ He raised a hoof to me.

“No, don’t say anything.” I didn’t feel sympathy for him.

“I had been warned by the guards that took you from the academy how deadly you were from the waste down.” He sat back down at the table and took a drink from one of the glasses.

“You have three weeks,” he said.

“Wha-what do you mean?” I asked.

“Three weeks until what?”

Silver sighed slowly.

“Until the probation officer gets this and sends you to the front line.” It got quiet suddenly.

“Well, for the three weeks you’re here why not show the new guy the ropes.” A sly smirk crossed his muzzle.

“After all he will be replacing you.” I saw red, I lunged at him but three of the others seated at the table rose and held me back, just barely though.

“Woah!” He said backing up with a smile putting both hooves up.

I finally calmed down. The others still held me back, I stood and barred my teeth at him, I kept my head down looking up at him. He walked up and lifted my head up face him.

“Maybe we can arrange something?” he asked with a smug smile. He leaned in close and whispered something in my ear.

“If you do a favor for me later, I’ll do a favor for you.” He backed up with the same smile and walked out.

“Meet me in my quarters around twenty-one hundred sharp tonight for your assignment.” He said walking out towards one of the hallways that led to the barracks.

The others let me go and I dropped to the floor.

“Crimson.” Blue said to me coming to my side. His young orange eyes torn full of concern.

“Crimson, what’s going to happen to you?” He asked. He stood almost to eye level with me.

“Blue, It’s going to be fine.” I said smiling at him. I put a hoof around him and pulled him close.

“Nothing is going to happen to me.” Blue looked down at the floor.

“Okay Crimson, I’ll have to trust you.” He had a young innocence to him. He was a few years younger than I was but he had an innocent feel in his tone when he spoke, almost as if he was a young colt. I turned my attention from Blue’s dismal face to the crowd of chatting jarheads.

“So who’s this new guy I’m supposed to train?”

A larger yellow pegasii by the name of “Buster”, I think it is, looked next to him. A white earthpony sat slumped over asleep. The pegasii raised a leg and nudged him. He shot up from his slumber, his eyes a little pink. He rubbed them with that back of his hooves and looked at the yellow pegasii. Buster gestured over to me. The white stallion put his hooves on the table and lifted himself out of the seat. His hooves were huge, bigger than any others I’ve seen. He got up and rolled his shoulders back letting a crack out with each inch they went back. Finally he walked towards me, his eyes were half open his mouth hung low on his face but that might be from the angle his head was at. His ears weren’t up the also hung low. His maroon-burgandy eyes stood out above all else on him. Shinier new armor was cleaned and glowed on his body as he walked. Walking up to me he outstretched a hoof.

“My name’s Starblazer.” He said. His voice sounded worn and scratchy but young. His face looked that way, young, clean, new.

“I’m your new partner.” I grabbed his hoof and raised it once and lowered it down.

“It’ll be a pleasure working with you.” I nodded,

“hopefully it’ll be the same with you.” I said a half smile raised his cheek on one side.

“I think we’ll get along fine.” He said.

I sat back down at the table and he sat across from me. Blue found a seat right next to me.

“So Starblazer,” I said getting his attention.

“What’s your story.” He looked confused.

“Excuse me?” he said softly in the same scratchy tone.

“What’s your story? Where are you from? Why did you join?” His eyebrows raised above his mane that hung low into his face. He exhaled slightly and took a deep breathe in.

“Well,” he said.

“I think I should come off by saying that I volunteered.” He explained rubbing one of his large hooves through his nicely groomed mane.

“I needed the cash and my family needed a place to stay that was safe-“

“You have a family?” Blue piped up interrupting him.

“How old are you exactly? You don’t look much older that me.” Blue asked.

“I started my life young,” Starblazer said with a content smile. His eyes never changed from the half open position they were at, his mouth was the only real way he showed emotion.

“You and me are probably the same age.” Starblazer said.

“I had a kid at a young age, probably when you were just taking your flight test.” Blue’s eyes open wide, in shock most likely. I stepped in,

“So are you married?” I asked.

He lowered his head down resting his chin on his hooves that were crossed on the table.

“No, I have a girlfriend, it's our kid, but we’re not married.” I nodded.

“I see,” I said sitting back in my seat.

“So why did you join?” I asked. He raised his head from the table propped a hoof up under it.

“I didn’t feel safe with my family where we were living. I joined because they house the families of soldiers near military bases and they stay for free.” I nodded again closing my eyes.

“So yeah,” I heard him say.

“What about you?” A chill ran down my spine.

“I was-“ I shook my head.

“I was drafted.” Starblazer raised his eyebrows up under the hairline of his mane, pushing himself back putting his hooves on the table outstretching his forelegs out.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear that.” He said.

“What were you doing before the draft?” I tapped my hooves together slightly thinking whether or not to tell him.

“I-I was,” I hesitated for a second.

“I was going to school in the Canterlot Academy of the Arts.” He nodded slowly.

“I lived in a town just south of Canterlot.” He said.

“Back in Ponyville.” He crossed his hooves and looked at the table. He lifted a hoof and brushed his mane to the side.

All that remained was silence now with the background noise of the other ponies talking and eating. Starblazer dropped a hoof down below the table. His mane stayed gently in place as his body froze for a second. He lifted his head back up and a cigarette hung from his lips. He rolled his neck around and brought up a small lighter from a munitions pocket in his armor. Click click click went the lighter as he held it in one hoof and struck it with the other. A little flame lifted from the small metal box and lit the cig hanging between his lips. He took a long drag of it, pulled it away from his mouth and let out a plume of smoke up into the air. He looked over to me and gestured to it.

“I don’t smoke, Starblazer.” He nodded wit his eyes closed.

“You can call me Star.” He said. Blue looked over to a clock hanging on one of the far walls.

“Crimson, it’s two-0-thirty hours.” I looked at the clock and nodded

“I know.”

The realization that you are on your final death march before the hanging is a difficult one to cope with, and when it hits you, it hits hard. Silver spoke of an assignment he wanted me to do, but if it was anything I was thinking of I’d rather be on the front line. The fact that Silver has complete control over every move I make and that I tried cutting his strings, I might be screwed over more than I know.

I rose from the bench and grabbed my helmet off the table, carefully balancing it between my shoulder blades.  I made my way back into the dark hallway. A certain musk hovered in the air, the scent of steel and dust once again filled my nose. That familiar odor was intriguing to me, it reminded me of home again.

I remember back in Canterlot one of the professors’ rooms I studied in smelled similar to that wretched perfume. Mostly because he’s old and his room was old. I don’t remember his name but I do remember I used to talk with him a lot after class. He would ramble on about old time-y days and old pony mythology. It was always good material to take down for some notes. His stories always gave me writing ideas. The most memorable one was of the old days with users of the elements of Harmony. I remember he told me about how those six ponies scaled a mountain and defended the town from a fierce dragon that would possibly kill everyone. It was only a mare’s tale though. If I do remember anything about that professor is that he gave me so much to write about, man do I miss those days.

After walking around the labyrinth of metal hallways and doors I finally came onto Silver’s room. The doors to his quarters were bigger and were two wide instead of one. One the left was a red scanner, a red button, and above it a camera. I stared at the camera for a few seconds and then pressed the red button. A metallic buzzer sounded on the other side of the doors and they slid open. I walked inside slowly. His room was large and circular, a main chandelier-like light hung from the ceiling in the center of the grey and silver room. At the far end was a large chair with two hind legs showing through the legs of the chair. The walls were blank and there was nothing in the room. Two shutter doors were on each side of the room, one probably leading to his bed and the other to the washroom.

I stood up strait and kept my legs close together in proper order.

“Silver you wanted to see me, sir?” I saw a muzzle look out from one of the sides of the couch with a big smug grin.

“Crimson, I didn’t expect you to make it.” I wanted to break out, say something like “of coarse I did you asshole now what do you want?” but I didn’t.

“What was my assignment?” Silver rose from the chair, he had no armor on, nor a jumpsuit he had no clothing on.

“Sir, aren’t you required to where a jumpsuit when not in uniform?” Uniform was referring to the armor not the jumpsuit for some weird reason.

“Crimson, ever since you started here I’ve had my eye on you.” He said circling me.

“Well, I see you’ve come here for that assignment?” I nodded slowly, something wasn’t right about him, he wasn’t normal.

“Take your armor off, say a while.” Silver said lying down on the floor. I was a little confused.

“Just take your armor off Crimson, we’re all stallions here!” I didn’t move. It took a second but I knew what he was up to.

“Silver, I know why you made me come here and I’m not going to do it.” His face turned. His collected calm face changed.

“What are you getting at?” He said with the same tone but with a different expression.

“You want to go to the front lines?” He asked now rising up to all four legs.

“Do you Crimson?” I turned my head away, keeping my posture as strait as possible.

“I’m going to give you a chance to not go to any of it and for you to stay here.” He walked around me circling, observing me at every angle. Like puma watching his helpless prey.

“You just need to do a simple thing,” He said stopping in front of me with his ass in my face.

“And you know exactly what that is.” My heart sank; I felt it drop through my chest. I let my frame cripple below me. I collapsed to the floor. I never wanted to have to do this; this was the one thing I never wanted to experience.

I exhaled deeply and counted to ten. I tried everything that I knew that would keep me calm. This fear of, Celestia I don’t even know what, was tearing my mind apart.

“It’s either this or dying. It’s either this or dying.” I kept telling myself. I bowed my head down.

“Fine,” I said quietly. Silver walked closer to me.

“What was that?” He asked pricking an ear up.

“Fine,” I said louder

“I’ll do whatever you want.” I looked back at him; a big, white, evil smile was painted across his face.

“Don’t worry,” He said.

“I’ll try to be gentle.”