Hello. My name is Lucas. First thing I should make note of, I'm a human living in the 'magical' world of Equestria. How I got here, however, is an entirely different story for another day. But since you're here, I'm assuming you've heard of the Television show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Yeah, they don't role the cameras when I'm around, and when I am around and they desperately want a certain moment, they tell me to basically sit in a corner and be quiet, just because I'm a human. Bull crap, I know, but what can ya do? I should probably also note that the one known as Twilight Sparkle has allowed me to live in her tree library with her for the time being. Anyway, lots of funny stuff happens between the 'Mane 6', as I remember the Internet used to call them, and myself when the cameras are not rolling. This is one of those times.
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"Reapers?" Isaac asked in disbelief. Derpy and I just finished explaining our situation to my friends from earth.
"Yeah," I responded, "if we don't stop the changeling queen, this world is screwed." I saw a small bit of hopelessness fill Derpy's eye.
Jeremy spoke, "Well, it's not like we choice. From what I've gathered, we can't even go home without this helping this Celestia person."
"Yeah... About that..." I started. "She gave me a Chaos Emerald, and I don't think she knew that I could traverse dimensions with it."
"FREAKING BULLCRAP!" Isaac yelled as he grabbed my wrist and bent it.
"OWOWOWOW! You see- AH!- I couldn't just leave them- OUCH!- to die. What kind of person- OW!- would I be then?" I replied.
"He's got a valid point." Ben spoke up. "I mean, we're all Christians here. Leaving them to die would not be the Christian thing to do... Even if we REALLY don't want to help..." We all agreed and Isaac released my wrist. I rubbed it as Ben spoke again. "Of course, it still feels weird to be in a world based loosely around a TV show for little girls. But, I have to say, this pony- Derpy, was it?- looks kind of like a boss."
"Thank you." Derpy smiled.
"Can you guys keep it down?" Twilight said. "Zecora and I need to concentrate. Be like Fluttershy, she's not bothering anybody." 'Tis true. Fluttershy was indeed just sitting in the middle of Twilight's floor, doing absolutely nothing.
Zecora added, in that rhyming way that she does, "We do indeed need concentration, to make this spectacular potion of the nation. Be careful, Twilight, in what you do. Do not touch this potion brew. For it is still premature, even with it's charming allure."
Derpy began walking and talking, "Ah, what harm could it do- WHOOPS!" She accidentally bumped into it, knocked it over, spilling it all over Fluttershy. Twilight and Zecora were both shocked and angry. Isaac, Jeremy, Ben, and I just started laughing. Then, there was a puff of smoke. When it cleared, Fluttershy was gone.
"Where- Where'd she go?" Twilight asked.
"Um... Guys..." That was Fluttershy's voice resounding off the walls. We all walked outside, only to be greeted by a giant Fluttershy. If I know my Skyrim correctly, which I do, I'd say she was about the size of, if not slightly larger than a dragon. Of course, Jeremy, Ben, Isaac, and I started laughing even harder. "Um..." She 'quietly' said. "How'd everything get so small?"
"We're not small, Fluttershy, you're huge!" Twilight exclaimed. "It's probably due to the potion being premature!"
"I just don't know what went wrong..." Derpy said. "I don't remember this happening in my timeline..."
Fluttershy squeaked, "Is this... Is this permanent?"
Twilight replied, "I don't know... But Zecora and I will research a remedy for it. Don't worry Fluttershy, we'll have you back to normal in no time. In the mean time, go try to live out your day normally."
"Do you really think I can?" She asked.
"Uh... Yeah...-"
Rainbow Dash swooped in from out of nowhere and cut Twilight off, "Nope. You're probably going to destroy everything you love. Yeah, it's all going to burn and ponies are gonna chase you with pitchforks and torches and-" Fluttershy started crying.
"Rainbow Dash!!" Twilight scolded. At this point, my friends and I were quite literally on the ground laughing, and even Derpy started laughing with us as Fluttershy started flying away.
"Rainbow..." Twilight face was red as she growled.
"Yes?"
"Go practice your tricks."
"Okay. Jeez. I was just telling the truth..." With that, Rainbow Dash flew back to the sky.
"We're such jerks." Ben said in between his laughing.
"I know." I replied, finally able to control my own laughter.
Twilight spoke to us urgently, "We desperately need her back here pronto! Who knows what kind of damage she'll do!"
"We're on it. Come on guys." I said.
"Okie dokie." Derpy replied. My friends each stood up.
Ben spoke, "Yeah, no. I'm gonna walk this-a-way." He walked away.
"No." Isaac denied. "I'm going to cut off a dragon's wings beat the crap out him with them." He walked away as well.
"I'm just not going to help." Jeremy said.
"But," I retorted, "you have nothing better to do! And you said Fluttershy was the one you hated the least!"
"Still not gonna help." And so we argued for about half an hour until he finally said, "FINE. But you owe me a pretty penny for this."
I laughed. "Isaac is probably going to kill me eventually so I don't really care anymore."
"So, Lucas," Jeremy crossed his arms, "how do you propose we do this?"
Derpy spoke before I could. "That's easy. Just follow the trail of tears."
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Fluttershy flew. She didn't know where she was flying, but she didn't care. She just flew and cried. "I... I d-don't want to h-hurt anything... But w-why did they laugh at me?" She sobbed some more as she flew. She noticed the air got immensely colder. She could see mid-evil looking towns as she looked down. One even had a watch tower. She decided to land on it. She noticed the people in the town below. "Those creatures walk on two legs like Lucas and his friends! Maybe I can make friends with them!" She called to them. "Um... Hello down there..." But as she said that, the skies grew red and windy. People shouted in terror. She heard them say things such as,
"WHAT IN OBLIVION IS THAT?!?"
"Kill it!"
"VICTORY OR SOVNGARDE!"
"Dragons have returned!"
Fluttershy spoke, "What? I'm not a dragon! I'm a-" A fireball flew passed her face as she was also being fired upon with catapults. One hit the tower she landed on, creating a hole. She saw people running into the tower so she stuck her head in the hole. When she saw someone, she spoke. "Hi... My name is-"
"Back you foul monster!" The man yelled as he pulled out his sword and slashed her cheek. She brought her head out of the hole and began to cry again. She was hit by a fireball, which made her sob even more. It also made her realize she had to get out of here. Thus, she flew again. Narrowly dodging more fireballs and flaming catapult boulders, she landed in an overgrown forest, miles away from the mid-evil town. She laid on the ground and sobbed. "W-why do things keep hurting me? Am-am I truly a m-monster?"
"Face me, foul dragon!" A voice spoke from behind.
Fluttershy cowered and squeaked, "P-please don't h-hurt me! I didn't mean to scare that town!"
"Hmm..." The voice said. "You do not seem like the dragons I've fought in the past, and you do not speak the language of a Dovah. Pray tell me, creature, what are you?"
Fluttershy, while still cowering, repsponded, "My name is Fluttershy... A pegasus pony from-"
"Ahh! A mythical horse! Today is my lucky day! All the Jarls will be so jealous! But, I must ask, your size is quite unusual for a horse. And I've come across quite a few mythical beasts in my travels."
Seeing as this human was not going to hurt her, Fluttershy looked at him, then back at the ground, "Umm... You see... My friend Twilight made this juice... It spilt all over me... And then this happened... What did you say your name was again? It's ok if you don't want to tell me, though..."
"Oh! I think I see. I go by many names. When I visit the Holds, the people call me Dragonborn. ...I have long since forgotten my real name."
"That is so sad!" Fluttershy said. "I gonna help you find your name!"
The Dragonborn declined. "No, no. My name is too trivial a matter. It sounds to me that your problem is of greater importance. Do you have any friends to help you?"
Fluttershy thought for a moment, then spoke with sadness, "No... I don't..."
"Ah, oh well then. I will help you-"
"Fluttershy!" I called.
"Horse-thing! I really don't want to be helping... So come on!" Jeremy said, then was elbowed in the ribs by Derpy.
"Guys!" Fluttershy looked momentarily excited, then sorrowful. "What do you want?"
Derpy replied. "We need to get you back to Twilight's! She's gonna fix you!"
"Yeah- Wait, is that the Dragonborn?!?" I replied.
He replied. "Indeed. That is what I am called. Fluttershy, are these friends of yours?"
She quickly responded, "No."
"What are you talking about?" I asked. "We've been friends ever since Celestia sent me here to save you guys from the Reapers! Remember the Snowball War?"
Jeremy interjected, "I've never been friends with the ponies. I hate them all."
"Not helping!" I said.
"But... You all laughed at me when I got bigger..."
"Yep." Jeremy said. "It was funny."
"DUDE!" I yelled.
"What Jeremy means to say is," Derpy began a cover story. "that in light of the situation, it was all confusing, and the only way our minds could process it was through laughter."
"No," Jeremy started again, "I meant it was fun- HARGGDTH!!"
Derpy stuck a hoof in his mouth and whispered, "Are you TRYING to get us killed?"
He spat it out and replied, "Psh. From what Lucas has told us, she wouldn't even try."
"She's not the one that I'm worried about." Derpy said. "If we don't get her back to Twilight, Twilight will boil our faces, then feed them to llamas who will then stab our corpses at least thirty-seven times in the chest and then eat our hands. And don't even ask what they'll do if she gives us to them while on a cruise ship. The Twilight of my timeline did that to somepony... There are things in life you can't unsee..."
"You know I can't take you seriously when you say 'somepony', right?" He replied.
Derpy sighed, but was cut off by a roar. Instantly, a dragon was upon us! Fluttershy instantly began to cower again. The Dragonborn used the dragon shout Dragonrend, which pulls dragons to the ground. Jeremy climbed atop of the the dragon, ripped off a scale, and started beating the dragon with it. I reached for my Chaos Emerald, but it was't there. "Crap..." I whispered. Instead, I drew Chillrend to attack, but it didn't matter. Derpy drew two handguns, flew up to the dragons face and said, "Goodbye, wild heaven." and shot the reptilian many times in the face. It died rather quickly, and after it died, the Dragonborn absorbed its soul.
"Young boy," the Dragonborn spoke to me. "You said Fluttershy's species was in danger. How so?" I explained the entire story. "Let's see here," He wrote in a journal. "Fluttershy... Changeling queen... Can-tor-lot... Okay. I have some other quests to do, such as slaying the Emporer and making it rain flaming dogs for a daedric prince, but I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks, we'll need all the help we can get!" I said as he walked away. Then, I turned to Fluttershy. "C'mon. Let's go fix you. And before you pull that crap of, 'you guys laughed at me' think of this; if we really were not your friends,"
"Which I'm not." Jeremy interjected.
"Quiet you." I said. "If we really weren't your friends, do you think we would've risked our necks to save you from the dragon?"
"I guess not..." She replied.
"Exactly. Now c'mon. Let's go back. How did we even get in Skyrim anyway?" I asked. We all jumped onto Fluttershy's back as she flew us smoothly back to Twilight's house. When we arrived, Twilight was waiting with a science beaker.
"Thank goodness you guys are okay! Is everyone alright?"
I started, "We did run into some trouble,"
Derpy finished, "but I fixed it."
"Good!" Twilight exclaimed. "Now, Fluttershy, the potion in this beaker should return you to normal size... Uh, you guys might want to get off of her." We complied as Fluttershy drank the potion. Sure enough, one of Twilight's inventions actually worked for once, surprising, I know, and Fluttershy returned to normal size.
"Well, this wrapped up nicely." I remarked.
"Where's Isaac and Ben?" Jeremy asked. Just then, Ben came over, carrying lots of weapons.
He said, "Hey guys. I didn't really know what to do after I walked away, so I made weapons for us... Actually, I found Lucas' Chaos Emerald and took them from a different dimension."
"So that's where my Chaos Emerald went! DUDE! Not cool!" I exclaimed.
"Interesting." Jeremy said. "What'cha got?"
"For you, Jeremy, a shotgun and a hidden blade."
He handed those to Jeremy as he replied. "Cool."
"For myself, being the Kingdom Hearts fan that I am, I got duel Keyblades."
"I get it!" Jeremy said. "Because when you stick it in someone, it unlocks their death! Nice."
"And for Isaac, whenever he decides to show up, a blue beard and a disk thingy that I really don't have the slightest idea as to what it does. I guess he'll just have to figure it out for himself. Now I want some noodles..." As if on cue, Isaac walked up and I could see that he did exactly what he said he was going to, because he has dragon wings attached to his back. But one question bugged me...
"Isaac, how in heck did you attach the wings to your back?"
He simply replied, "Duct tape."
"Of course you did." I said. And everybody laughed except for Isaac.
Because he only laughs at my pain.
THE END
