Equestria Noir Case 21 "Blood is Thicker than Wine"

by Jacoboby1

Chapters

Chapter 1 "Blood Has Been Poured"
Chapter 2 "Among Allies"
Chapter 4 "Half"
Chapter 5 "Red Gold"
Epilogue
Chapter 3 "Red Hearts, Red Wine"

Chapter 1 "Blood Has Been Poured"

Equestria Noir

Case 21

“Blood is Thicker than Wine”

By Jacoboby1, Sour Grapes, and Shattered Illusions

Chapter 1

“Blood has been poured”

“Again, Applejack, I’m really sorry this all happened,” I said, sweating a little as the farm pony glared at me.

“Sorry?” she said, her green eyes showing no signs of mercy “Ya think sorry is gonna cover the fact that Ah caught yer mutt in mah barn?”

I looked behind me to see Luca, my pet wolf hiding behind me. Usually I let him roam in the Everfree Forest, but I call on him when I need a nose better than mine. He did have a playful side too, constantly running and playing with us whenever Tailspin or I was home.

Right now though, he had his tail in between his legs, thanks to Applejack. I looked back at Applejack and said, “Look, Luca is very sorry about what happened too.”

“Normally Ah’d be easy to forgive,” but Ah’m not too forgivin' of a wolf that came tah deflower mah Winona!”

Winona was Applejack’s border collie herd dog. She was friendly and loved to play with others. From what I heard, she was very useful around the farm too. Right now though, she was gazing longingly from behind Applejack. Luca was trying not to meet her eyes out of shame or embarrassment. I wondered who started this exactly.

“Now listen 'ere, Private,” Applejack said, pointing an accusatory hoof at me, “you’re mah friend, and Ah owe ya big time fer what you’ve done for this family. That doesn’t mean Ah’m gonna allow Winona tah have puppies before she’s ready.” She hugged the dog and stroked her brown head with a hoof. “She’s just too young fer that kinda relationship.”

Again Winona looked at Luca; I’m still not sure what happened in the barn. All we know is, that during the reunion’s wrap up, Applebloom caught the two of them “Wrestling” in the barn. Next thing I know, I’m down here apologizing profusely for my wolf’s apparent behavior.

I sighed, looked up at Applejack contritely, and asked, “Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”

Applejack set down Winona, who went off to chase some rabbits that got into the stores, and gestured to a small basket behind me. “Actually, Mah cuzin, Sour Grapes, lives a little ways down the road. As it turns out we have a bunch of leftover fritters from the reunion. Ah would normally drop them off mahself, but Ah gotta start getting fields ready fer the new plantain' season. If ya could get these over tah her Ah’d appreciate it. She should be at Twilight’s place right bout now doin' whatever smart ponies do.”

Sour Grapes was a friend of Twilight’s. They'd met a long time ago, back when she first came to Ponyville. Twilight mentioned her once in a while, but we'd never actually met face to face.

I apologized to Applejack again, levitated the basket beside me, and walked the path away from the barn. I looked over at Luca, his yellow eyes not meeting mine. “Okay, be honest, who started it?” I asked.

He barked once and then went back to walking.

I shook my head and asked, “Was she worth it, man?”

He gave me a look that I translated as, “Yeah, so what.”

“Do you like her?”

His look said, “Sure, but I don’t know if it’ll work.”

“Applejack intimidates you, huh?” I asked with a grin.

He growled, that meant, “You try getting mistaken for a timber wolf and running around getting shot at.”

“Alright,” I said as I rolled my eyes, “but in the end?”

His ears flattened, that told me, “I’m crazy about her man. Other wolves think I’m weird for liking dogs, but she is just so beautiful.”

I smiled and rubbed his head with my hoof. “Just don't get in trouble next time. Start with dinner, and try not to make it Angel Bunny, ” I chided him gently.

He whined a little, for some reason Luca always resented Fluttershy’s pet rabbit. Every single time I asked Fluttershy to watch him she tells me he and Angel were “Playing chase.” For some reason the bunny always looked terrified afterwards. This didn’t add a lot of confidence to his apparent sincerity.

“Just keep away from Winona for a while,” I warned, as I watched him take off for the Everfree Forest.

I shook my head and made my way to Golden Oaks library. I heard voices on the other side and slowly peeked in. There was Twilight talking with another mare. She was chocolate brown with a long dark brown mane that had a horn sticking out. Her violet eyes were behind a pair of round glasses. She had a cutie mark of a bunch of grapes on her flank; this had to be Sour Grapes.

Twilight was speaking, “So as it turns out, I was wasting more magic then I thought while teleporting. With a basic reexamination of Ember Stone’s theory of relative dimensionality, my teleportation is far more efficient”

“Good to know. Magic wasted is magic you may need, later," the chocolate brown unicorn said nodding. "The way you go 'round, Twi, you'll be needing all your magic at your disposal. First as one of the greatest heroes of Equestria, and now as an assistant to a detective."

Maybe I can gauge what Twilight really thinks of me if I listen in. Leaving it just open enough to hear what Twilight was saying . "Well, I try not to get a swelled head. Private does just as much saving Equestria as I do."

"I know,” Grapes replied. “He helped Big Mac, and a lot of others I've heard about."

I tried not to get a swelled head myself as Twilight said, “Yeah, he’s a great guy. I’m lucky to have him.”

I could just see Grapes’ smirk. “You’re pretty fond of him huh, Twilight?” she asked teasingly.

“Well yeah,” Twilight said, sounding flustered. “I mean he’s strong, kind, smart and very sweet on the-” She paused for a minute and then shouted indignantly, “Quit smirking like that!”

Grapes stifled a laugh and said, “I’m sorry, you’re just so cute when you’re gushing over him like this.”

“I’m not gushing over him!” Twilight snapped. I could just see her blushing. “Stop teasing, Grapes!”

The unicorn laughed merrily and apologized, “Sorry, you know I tease all my friends.”

“Great, now you have an excuse to tease me,” Twilight said grumpily.

“And I’m milking it for all it’s worth,” Grapes answered.

My fun was had and I decided to open the door. Twilight looked at me, going even redder in the face. “Private! Were you eavesdropping?” she asked.

“Well,” I said with a small smirk, “I may have overheard my marefriend gushing over me.”

Twilight just shook her head and I looked over at her friend. “I gather that you are Miss Sour Grapes?”

“Just call me Grapes,” she answered with a smile.

I levitated the basket of fritters into her eagerly waiting hooves. “I got drafted by your cousin to give you some of these.”

Twilight gave me a look as Grapes looked on her prize. “Winona?” she asked.

“I’m afraid my wolf may have gotten hooked,” I said flatly.

“I’ve been telling AJ for weeks that Winona was giving him looks,” Twilight said with a sigh. “Apple family stubbornness…” She then gave Grapes a smile. “Uh, no offense”

Grapes just smiled back and waved her hoof dismissively. “I’m too happy by the sight of AJ’s fritters to be offended anyway,” she replied. “As for the Border collie, like I always say, life is strange, and love is stranger.”

She was a pretty smart mare, I’ll give her that. Twilight then gestured to me and formally introduced us, “Private, this is my friend Sour Grapes, we’re kind of the biggest nerds in town.”

“She's the biggest,” Grapes cut in. “I'm just the second biggest.”

I wasn’t going to say I probably was the third biggest. Thank Celestia Raiden wasn’t here to say that. Twilight went on “We kind of get together once in a while to talk about events and magic, stuff like that.”

“Speaking of events,” Grapes added, “tell him about the Caffeinated Calamity some time.”

“Unlike you Grapes, some of us want to forget that,” Twilight said humorlessly.

I laughed a little. “So Grapes, you obviously do something with your namesake judging by your cutie mark.” I pointed at her flank and Grapes gave a wide smile.

“I run Grapevine Hills Vineyard and Winery,” she said, proudly. “It’s a pretty big business, especially around this time of year when everypony is starting to get into garden parties.”

“I may need to sample some of your merchandise,” I said with a smile. “Just to see how it stands up to Potso’s.”

She titled her head and asked, “He makes his own wine?”

“His mom was in the business,” I explained. “She came from Bitallia.”

“I’d be happy to see if she can top some of mine,” Sour Grapes said, when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

I went to answer it and found myself facing a grey chest. I looked up and saw that I was looking what can best be described as a grey Big Mac with wings. His coat was dark grey like a raincloud, his mane was like dark as well. His sky blue eyes looked down at me, and then up past me.

“Excuse me,” he said, rudely pushing past me, I saw that he was a Pegasus judging by the wings on his sides. They weren’t small wings either, they were huge! He was like an albatross!

He rushed over to Sour Grapes, looking panicked. “You have to come with me!” he said urgently. “Cops are all over the vineyard! Three ponies were murdered there!”

Grapes cried out in shock, “Oh Tartarus no! Murders? Not at MY vineyard!”

“That’s not the worst part,” the grey stallion went on, “they’re saying that you killed them!”

“Look, I know I’m a hard taskmaster,” Grapes said with a shake of her head “but I’d never kill anypony!”

"I know you wouldn't," he said wrapping his hooves and wings around her comfortingly. “Are you alright, Grapes?” he asked concern evident in his voice. The question seemed to have some deeper undertones, as though he was asking about more than just her reaction to his shocking news.

“I’m fine, Stormfront,” Grapes answered, her tone of voice somewhere between grateful and annoyed. “Really!”

"This is the last thing you need on top of everything else," he said studying her worriedly. "You know you shoul-"

“I’m fine!” Sour cut him off, but then she buried her head in his chest. “I’m fine okay, it was a one-time thing.”

“If you say so,” Stormfront said, his tone betraying how he really felt.

I wasn't sure exactly what was going on between the two, but clearly they were in need of my help. I walked to the couple and said, "Sorry to interrupt, but it sounds like you could use some help. I can come along if you'd like. I am a private detective with some experience in these matters. The name is Private Eye."

Stormfront gazed at me, relief evident in his eyes. "The Private Eye?" he asked. “I've read a lot about you. Do you really think you could help?”

I nodded firmly and replied, “I’m sure of it. Take us there.”

_________________________________________________________

Grapevine Hills lived up to its name. The landscape had small hills, where the grape frames marched in rows across the hilly fields. Vines twined up the wooden poles, and draped over the strong twine connecting them, clothing the bare frames in dark green leaves and round bunches of fruit. Reds and purples dominated the landscape of the vines, but there were some rows of whites, as well.

On another hill sat the farmhouse, a medium two-story structure in the fine old Ponyville style. Stuccoed walls with a thatched roof, and good sturdy beams stained in a dark color standing out proudly against the white of the plaster.

Next to it, looking quite out-of-place, was the two-story bunk-house. It was well-maintained, but it was obviously added later in the life of the vineyard. It was wood, with a white-painted siding, and a roof that looked better suited to be the hull of a boat, than the top of a house. It was this second structure that had the heavy police presence.

Right now though, the place wasn’t trying to be picturesque. Cops were everywhere combing the place looking for evidence. I looked up and saw a familiar uniform salute as we approached. “Detective Private Eye! Good to see you sir!”

“At ease, Dunnit,” I said, allowing the orange earth pony to relax. “What’s going on here?”

“Forceps is hoping to figure that out now,” he answered. “Though, it’s not looking good for you, Miss Grapes.”

Sour Grapes gave him a rather harsh glare “What exactly happened here?”

“Sorry Ma'am, I don't feel comfortable letting civilians other than the detective and his partner in.” He gestured to Twilight and me, and said, “Forceps specifically requested you.”

She suddenly got into the uniform’s face and growled, “Well I specifically request that you take me to this pony who thinks he can just march into my vineyard and take over. I don’t think anypony wants a repeat performance of Blueballs.”

“No, ma'am,” Dunnit said, shaking like a leaf. “You can go on in with Private.”

“Thank you, good sir,” she said in a mock fashion, before walking with us into the crime scene.

Dunnit lead us into a small storage shed. There were two bodies laid out on the floor among the wines. A third one was being examined on the ground outside by none other than old Forceps. He smiled as he saw me and said, “Hey sonny, it’s great to see you.”

“It’s been a while, Forceps” I said, giving the old coot a smile. “So, what have we got?”

Forceps pointed at the two bodies leaning against the wall of the shed, they were covered nearly head to hoof in wine. Two broken glass bottles were on the floor. “Well, you got these two stiffs here, both earth ponies. One male, one female.”

“Treebinder?” Grapes asked in shock, peeking her head and looking at the two bodies. Then she noticed the identity of the mare, “Oh no! Not Mirabelle Time, too.”

“You know these ponies, Grapes?” Twilight asked, looking at the brown mare.

She nodded as Stormfront left to be interviewed by another officer. “Yeah, I know him too,” she replied, gesturing to the pegasus. “This guy is named Parsley. All three were temps I hired weeks ago.”

“Well, they got a new occupation,” Forceps cut in, “Stiffs.” He laughed uproariously at his bad joke.

Sour looked a little mortified by Forceps’ callous nature with death. I looked to Twilight and said, “Keep her company while I examine the bodies.”

My marefriend nodded and lead Grapes out, leaving Forceps and I with the victims. I looked to the male earth pony. He looked to be about late teens, or early twenties, with a long tan colored mane and a coat of verdant blue. I pulled out my magnifying glass and began to examine the body carefully. “What have you got so far?” I asked Forceps.

“This guy was conked on the head by them wine bottles,” Forceps explained. Then he turned the body’s neck with his magic, revealing a small hole in the back of his neck. “Looks like he got stuck with some kind of syringe too. I’ll need to take him back to the lab for a better look.”

I searched the victim’s pockets and came up with a wallet. I opened it to reveal a farmer’s license. Sure enough, this was Tree Binder. “Do you have an estimated time of death?”

“I’d say round midnight judging by his body temperature,” Forceps replied, “Same with the mare stiff.”

I looked at the earth pony mare. She was a rather plain looking pony with a bistro colored coat and a long yellow mane. I searched her wallet and found that this was Mirabelle. “Same conditions,” Forceps said. “Dead round midnight, cause of death was a drug overdose of some kind.”

“What about the pegasus here?” I asked, looking at the pegasus strewn out on a blanket.

“Now this one’s interesting,” he said, lifting his wings off his body. “We found this stiff on the weather vane, got skewered like a shish kebab.”

The pegasus in question was about my age. He had a mint green coat and a short blond mane. I saw the impalement wound on his stomach. “How’d he manage to get himself impaled on a weather vane?” I asked.

“Telekinesis,” Forceps replied. “We found traces of unicorn magic on him. Somepony yanked him by his legs and plunged him down on top of it.”

“Do you have a DNA match?” I asked.

“We’ll see once-“

“Once I get back to the lab,” a deep voice said.

I looked up towards the source of the voice. It belonged to a large tan colored unicorn pony that was walking towards me. His mane was short and greying and his eyes were dark green. They did not look happy. He was clad in a brown trench coat with a white fedora that held back the spring sun.

His dark green eyes glared at me, “I don’t think I allowed meddlesome hybrids to interfere at my crime scenes.”

“Thatcher Hook?” I said, standing up and looking at him. “What are you doing here? I thought you retired to Fillydelphia.”

“Shinebadge is calling in some of our younger retirees now that the crime rate is up,” he replied. “Now, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave my crime scene.”

“Listen here, sonny,” Forceps cut in, “Private here may be a youngster, but he’s solved twice as many cases in half as many years you’ve been alive.”

“Watch your tongue, Forceps,” Thatcher threatened. “I’m not having a hybrid working this case. He’s already tainted the very air by breathing it.”

“Look here, pal!” I said, getting in his face. “I know you’ve never liked me, but if you can’t keep your prejudice views out of a case then I’m starting to question Shinebadge’s wisdom in bringing you back.”

“Your attitude reeks just like your chicken of a mother,” he insulted.

“How dare you!” I was about ready to pummel him when I felt magic yank on my tail. I looked up to see Twilight get between me and Thatcher, his attitude quickly changed.

“M'lady Sparkle,” he said with a quick bow. “I had no idea you were with this, ruffian.”

“Save it,” Twilight snapped. “I will not have you egging on Private while I’m around. Otherwise, I’ll have Princess Celestia herself deal with you.”

“M'lady!” Thatcher exclaimed. “Surely you see the misguidance in letting a hybr-“

“That’s my coltfriend you’re speaking of,” Twilight growled. “Now, you will keep your comments about hybrids to yourself. Otherwise, I’m going to have to show you just what I can do with my horn.”

Is it possible to be scared shitless and turned on by Twilight taking down this nutjob?

“Very well, Miss Sparkle,” he said begrudgingly. “Though I still don’t appreciate him tampering with my crime scene.”

“Which also happens to be my vineyard,” Grapes interjected.

Sour Grapes walked up and stood by Twilight. “Just what the hay is going on here? Why are there dead bodies in my shed?” she demanded to know.

“You should hold your tongue as well,” Thatcher said, “Lest you incriminate yourself.”

“What are you talking about?” Grapes asked in disbelief, shaking her head. “I’d never kill anypony.”

“No,” Thatcher said, a smirk growing on his face “but, even the greatest of us can be driven to if the conditions are right”

Grapes didn’t say anything for a minute.

“I had uniforms call up the family members. According to reports from them, they described their workplace as stressful, their boss unmerciful, and the conditions bleak.” he said, eyeing her suspiciously.

“Only because they weren’t doing their jobs,” Sour answered, “I hired them on because of a boom crop. I was hoping to get some decent help. However, Parsley was caught stealing grapes, Treebinder was sleeping on the job, and Maritime wouldn’t stop complaining. So you can hardly call them model employees”

“All of their families said they had something on you though,” Thatcher said. “Something that they said would get you good. Covering up a scandal would be prime motive for murder.”

“What scandal?” Twilight asked.

“They didn’t say,” Thatcher answered, “but I’m sure we’ll find out after our investigation.”

“I didn’t kill anypony!” Sour fired at him. “I’d never kill anypony, and Twilight knows it!”

Twilight nodded and said, “I’ve known Sour Grapes almost the entire time I’ve been in Ponyville. She’s blunt yes, but she’s fair and honest.”

“Then explain to me one thing,” Thatcher said.

I looked at him, awaiting what he had to say but I wasn’t prepared for this…

“How come she wasn’t in bed during the time of the murder, and nopony could find her until morning?” he asked smugly.

Chapter 2 "Among Allies"

Chapter 2

“Among Allies”

Sour Grapes made a face and then her violet eyes were down cast. “I was out,” she mumbled.

“Out where exactly?” Thatcher asked, advancing on the chocolate unicorn.

“I was out around town!” she suddenly snapped. “What? Am I not allowed to walk in town with my coltfriend once in a while?”

Storm stepped in before Thatcher could get any closer and said, “I was with her all night." He gave a look to Sour. I didn’t miss the look she gave him. It was a look that meant that she wanted Storm to say something a specific way. Storm looked back at Thatcher and continued, "We were out for a night on the town.”

“All night?” Thatcher asked, his voice ringing with suspicion. “Then explain why that night pony pup said you never came home?”

“Hold it!” Sour growled, stepping around Storm. Her violet eyes filled with rage. “You talked to Earshot?”

Earshot? Night pony? Those were real? I had heard about them from old stories. They were a nocturnal cousin of the pegasi said to have thrived a thousand years ago. Nowadays you don’t hear much of them. However their appearance has inspired many dark tales about them, including the Vampony.

I looked over as Thatcher went on, “He was very helpful in poking holes in your testimony. He said he went to the farmhouse last night and didn’t find you there. He was the only one awake that night and at the vineyard during the murders.”

“And just how willing was he to give you this info?” Grapes asked, her voice almost a growl.

“He was a little less willing then he should be,” Thatcher replied, his tone ringing with disgust. “He should be proud to aid in a murder investigation, but what can you expect from a race of murderers and thieves?”

Sour Grapes completely lost it. "Excuse me? Let me get this straight. You intimidated, and generally bullied a ten-year-old colt, because you weren't getting the information you wanted to implicate the half-breed owner of one of the more popular wineries in Equestria for murder. Then you go on to accuse the whole tribe of being murderers and thieves because of those thousand-year old mares' tales? May I ask how in the hoary horseradished hay did you EVER become a detective? You seem more suited to the slanderous journalism trade, because you most certainly are a master spin doctor."

“That’s enough,” I said, stepping in between them. I then glared at Thatcher. “I think you’ve said enough, I’m going to have to ask you to leave this crime scene.”

“By whose authority?” Thatcher spat. “You're just some low life hybrid private dick horseshoe.”

“So far, you’ve slandered a fellow officer, accused a suspect without proof, and threatened a colt to get what you wanted. You thought you could do this all while maintaining your honor as a detective? This isn’t the 950’s where you could get away with that kind of attitude. How is that going to look when I inform Princess Celestia herself about your performance? I’ll have you know, one word about this and she’ll make sure that not even a nursing home will take you in.”

With that Thatcher spat on the ground in front of me and turned to walk away, snarling, “Fine! Solve your blasted case, but don’t think for a minute this is over.”

Twilight stood beside me and glared back at him. Then she looked at me and said, “Just say the word, Private. I can have him taken care of in an hour.”

“It’s fine, Twilight,” I said, shaking my head. “We’ll get through this without having to resort to using threats.”

I looked back at Sour Grapes, Storm had a hoof on her shoulder. I could tell she had a lot on her chest she had to let out. I walked to her and said, “Sour?”

She shook her head and said, “I’m not going to talk about what happened last night. I had nothing to do with the murders.”

“But, this cou-“

"Look, now's not the time to go into that. Knowing that flankhole, he's probably scared poor Earshot to death. He's used to ponies finding him different, because of all the old stories, but every time he's been bullied, he's had somepony there to stand up for him. I want to make sure he's all right, first and foremost."

I slowly nodded and said, “Alright, but do not leave the vineyard. Not that I don’t trust you or anything. I just want to be sure.”

Grapes nodded and her and Storm walked away towards the farm house.

Twilight pressed herself into my side and asked, “You okay?”

I sighed and replied, “That guy has never liked me because of what I am.”

“How can he go off saying all those things,” Twilight said with a shake of her head. “It’s despicable to even think that way. Just because you have a mixed parenthood doesn't make you any less of a pony.”

“Thatcher comes from the Hook family,” I explained. “They are one of the biggest noble families in Manehattan. In public, they are a rich and generous family, giving a great amount of support to government programs. In private, however, they are a bunch of pompous unicorns who believe they're better than anypony else. They especially hate even the notion of hybrids too.”

Twilight then nuzzled me gently on the neck. I moved my head to nuzzle her back. “Don’t listen to him, Private,” she said warmly. “You’re not any less of a pony because your father loved a pegasus. You prove guys like him wrong every day.”

“Thanks, Twilight,” I said, laying a kiss on her horn. “I needed that.”

She returned with a kiss on my cheek and said, “I’m going to go scout around the perimeter. See if the murderer dropped anything.”

I watched her leave with a small smile on my face. I walked into the vines of the vineyard and felt slightly better about this. Twilight just seemed to brighten my day no matter how bad it got. Man, I hope my day keeps getting better li-

Suddenly a huge weight fell on my back. I struggled and managed to look up at another pegasus.

"AVAST, ye scalliwag! Ye'll not be searchin' for anything else to be framin' Grapes fer! I'll see ye keelhauled first," bellowed a grizzled seafoam blue pegasus in a striped shirt and sailor's hat.

“Wait!” I cried, afraid of whatever getting keelhauled meant. “I’m not working with Thatcher!”

"Yer not?" he asked, eyeing me skeptically. "So why are ye here, then?"

"I'm detective Private Eye!" I said, sweating a little. "I'm working with Twilight to help clear Grape's name! Please don't keelhaul me!”

"Friend of Twilight's, eh? If that lass likes ye, ye can't be all bad," the sailor said, rubbing the black patch on his muzzle. "I be Summer Squall. Sea and hurricane specialist in the Royal Equestrian Rogue Storm Emergency Response Team. Supervisor, an' Applejack Wager Quality Control Specialist for Grapevine Hills Vineyard and Winery."

Squall pulled me to my hooves with surprising strength. "I can tell ye, now, lad, Grapes didn't kill those lagabouts. She was tryin' to find hard evidence to fire 'em, but she'd never kill anypony."

I nodded and levitated out my notebook, asking, “What can you tell me about the victims?”

"Eh. Typical run o' the mill temps. Though at least that Parsley feller wasn't as bad as that one lad, Fritter. Hear tell that Fritter ate half a basket, while harvestin'. Parsley just stole a bunch or two. Nary a clue what he intended to do with them," Squall said leading me to what was obviously a weigh-in area. There was a scale, and the baskets, which came to a pony's shoulder. "Treebinder tended to find ways to sleep on the job. We'd have covered for the lad, if he were a mite friendlier. 'Bout as useless and a Blunderdolt, in my opinion. Last one, that Maribell... Storm and thunder, was she a primadonna. Complained e'ery moment. Like she was 'sposed to get special treatment or summat."

I nodded as he went on with his testimony about the temps.

"'Case yer wonderin', Fritter was another temp, from way back when Stormy started workin' 'ere. Overweight fellah, an' ole Grapes couldn't figure out why he wasn't bringin' in as much grapes as he shoulda been. Then she figured a way to get the lad on the scales, here, before an' after his shift to prove that he was eatin' the grapes insteada harvestin' 'em. She had solid proof to fire the lad, so she gave him the boot. Right over the gate."

I was a little unnerved by what he meant by getting it over the gate. However, I let that slide and decided to move on. "So, where were you last night around midnight?” I asked

"Restin' me old bones, lad," Squall replied. "Used to be quite the Tartarus-raiser in me youth."

"Thanks Squall," I said with a nod. "I'll need you to talk to some of the uniforms and make a statement. Are there any other ponies around I can talk to?"

Squall pointed towards a water pump not far from here. “Oh aye, lad. Queenie's over there, if ye'd like to speak to her," he suggested.

I nodded and walked towards the water pump where he pointed. Right there I saw... oh boy...

She was beautiful. There was no other word to describe her. Nothing like Twilight, of course, but she would be one to make stallions swoon, and mares jealous. Her coat was a light blue, and glistened in the light, like the sun on newly fallen snow. Her mane and tail were golden, and fell in loose ringlets.

From the expression on her face I could tell she too was affected by what was going on. I cleared my throat to get her attention.

She turned toward me, head tilted and eyebrow raised. "Yes?" she asked in a cultured accent. Not from Canterlot, but definitely high class. It seemed familiar, though.

I gave her a gentle smile and said, "Detective Private Eye, I'm investigating what happened here. You are Miss..?"

"Ice Storm, of Avalanche Valley," she said with a rather cool demeanor. "Commonly called 'Queenie' by my colleagues. What can I do for you, Detective?”

"Avalanche Valley?" I asked blankly, then it dawned on me. "I thought your accent was familiar, you live near that winter resort up north."

"Yes, yes I do. It's something of a family business, you could say," she said guardedly.

"I'm sorry," I said, giving her a sympathetic look. "If your opinion of me is colored in any way by Thatcher. Just to let you know, I hate the guy's guts as much as probably everypony here, if not more."

Queenie raised an eyebrow at that and asked, “So you're not going to try and frame Grapes because of her parents marrying for love, rather than wealth and status?"

I shook my head and replied “My parents married for love rather than wealth and status too.”

"Good to hear," Queenie said with a smile, and sighed. "I'm sorry, but that utter twit seemed intent upon pinning this on Grapes, and I feared you were another of the type, but trying for sympathetic, rather than overt hostility."

I returned her smile and said, “I mean no harm to anypony here. I just want to find out what happened. I had heard that the victims were hardly good workers. Thatcher mentioned something about Grapes not being here last night, though?”

"She and Stormfront went into town. I can only imagine it was for a date. Took them long enough to admit their feelings, let alone act upon them," Queenie said with a chuckle.

I gave a small smile to that. "I figured that was their relationship. Though, in order to clear up her name, I need to know of any date spots they prefer. Any restaurants I can check out to give her a decent alibi."

"Then tend to go everywhere, honestly. From the small diner, to Horsia's... Fellow gives her a discount for providing their wine list. We all head to the Shoe In for karaoke night every other Saturday, and sometimes Grapes and Stormy go to that club run by DJ Pon3. Grapes got a VIP pass to it, before it even opened... Something about doing a salsa in the town square with Pinkie and Rarity."

I nodded and replied, "If you could get me a list and some phone numbers I can call I'd appreciate it."

"All right. Let me get this water to Firestormer first. He's been working like crazy to keep from doing something regrettable."

"Who's Firestorm?" I asked, about two seconds later I got my answer. An orange pegasus zoomed by a batch of grapes, gathering them at seemingly lightning speed.

"That's FirestormER," Queenie, said emphasizing the 'er', and waving a hoof at the orange pegasus. "FIRESTORMER!" she yelled.

He flew back, plopping a basket down, and panting a bit. He too, didn’t seem happy upon seeing me.

"What, Queenie?" he asked, annoyed. I don't want to talk to any cops, right now."

"Not even one who's on Grapes' side?" Queenie asked, hoofing him the bucket of water.

He gulped down some water, then looked at me appraising. "You for real?" he finally asked.

I nodded and replied, "Detective Private Eye. I don't work with Thatcher, for a lot of good reasons."

"One of 'em being he's a prick?" Firestormer asked, his face seeming to naturally curve into a cocky smile. "You seem all right, so far. What'dya want to know?"

Queenie left the conversation, and went into the bunkhouse.

I gave him a look over and asked, "Wait... I know you from somewhere, don't I? I think you were in the paper once."

Firestormer looked to the side sheepishly and replied, “Yeah. Long time ago. Look, I don't like to talk about that much."

"Right," I said with a nod. "I was hoping you could tell me a little bit about Sour Grapes herself. I understand she's not the murdering type. Did she have any enemies or somepony that would want to frame her, aside from her just being a hybrid?”

"Well, that's the thing, she didn't make enemies. Even ponies she fired ended up respecting her, because she was always fair, and always very, if bluntly, honest. She had an escaped convict from Altri-traz prison hiding out here, and she inspired him to go back and serve his time, because of how fair she was," Firestormer said. "She's never fires on a whim, and always tries to have solid proof beforehand. Anypony who's done a good job, gets a letter of recommendation. Even the escaped convict."

That was certainly a good character cover. I nodded and said, "Did you find anything strange as you were flying around the vineyard?"

"I found this," Firestormer said, showing me a bottle. "What can you make of it?"

I opened the bottle, looked at the contents and gave a sniff. It certainly smelled familiar. I used my magic to pluck a nearby leave and applied the chemical to the leaf. It shriveled up on contact. "It's modified Glyphosate, used to kill weeds, but somepony remade it so that it would kill any plant it touches," I replied.

"Whoa...Think somebody was going to spray the vines with that crud?" Firestormer asked, his ears going back.

"It's the only explanation I can come up with," I said, closing the bottle carefully. "Where did you find it?"

"Over by the bunkhouse. On the side with the weather vane," Firestormer replied. "You don't think that pegasus had it, do you?"

"You'd make a pretty good detective one day," I said. "However, to be sure, I'd have to find traces on the body first."

Firestormer nodded. "Glad you're on board, Detective," he said. "As for enemies, she'd have for just being a hybrid you'd have to start with her grandmother."

I nodded and asked, “You got a name for me?

"Pave Diamond. Crazy lady's probably thinking her whole family's rebelling against her, and taking it out on Grapes..."

"Well yeah, dude, 'cos she's a total nag," added a tan unicorn with a blonde mane, tail, and goatee, as he walked in on our conversation.

“And you are?” I asked.

"Hi, I'm Diamond Dust. Grapes' cousin from the Diamond side of the family. Nice to meet 'cha, dude."

"I've heard of the Diamond family," I replied. "They used to do some work with my grandfather. I'm guessing it's no coincidence they stopped sending Hearth's Warming cards after my dad got married. From what I heard, they have as lousy an opinion of hyrbrids as Thatcher. Hard to believe somepony like Sour Grapes would come from them."

"Well Dad would have continued, but Grandma would have flayed him. He was already on her bad side for being 'unnatural'," Diamond Dust replied. " Aunt Champagne is nice, and so's Uncle Champagne. Er... Yeah, funny story. Champagne Grapes meets Champagne Diamond in Canterlot, and... the rest is history."

I laughed and excused myself leaving the two ponies and making my way back to the crime scene. It was relatively deserted now that the police had taken the bodies. I would say it was totally deserted, if not for one more inhabitant...

She was definitely not from around here. She was a pegasus, taller than your average Equestrian pony, with slender legs, and a mocha brown coat. Her strong muzzle suggested Saddle Arabian origins. Her mane was a glossy black.

She frowned and said something in a language I didn't recognize. She picked up one of the broken bottles and then I cleared my throat and said, "Ma'am?" She almost dropped the bottle in shock.

She spun around, glaring at me. "Do not sneak up on me, like that! You nearly made my heart attack me!" she snapped.

I raised an eyebrow and asked, "Um, don't you mean I nearly gave you a heart attack?"

She blinked and replied, “Ah, yes. That would be correct. Your language is confounding sometimes."

I gave a gentle smile and said, "It's alright. You must be another one of the workers here. I'm Detective Private Eye, what's your name?"

"I am Sirocco," she said with a bow. "I am the accountant for Grapes' Vineyard. I am here assessing the damages."

I levitated one of the broken bottles and said "This was used during the murder. I think the label is still intact" I gave it to her and her eyes scanned it.

She quickly wrote down the vintage, and some number that was along the side of the bottle. then she continued, "I cannot understand why someone would murder these poor souls. Moreover, I cannot understand why that detective is so intent upon Grapes being the murder. She is a good pony. Understanding of me and my problems with Equestrian, and is almost as good a big sister to Earshot as Lightening Stripe."

"If you think you can find out who bought this let me know" I said earnestly "I'm going to do everything in my power to help find out what happened"

Sirocco nodded. "Gladly, I shall also check our stores, and see if it came from there."

"Thank you" I said, just then Twilight walked in.

She looked at me and said “Private, Sour says that Earshot will see you now”

“Okay,” I nodded, “Let’s see what the kid saw”

__________________________________________________

Twilight and I left the shed and made our way to the farmhouse. We went inside to find that Grapes was laying on the floor with a little gray-coated colt. He had a dark purple-black mane and tail, and the bat wings the Night Ponies.

The Night Ponies were still fairly new, and slowly introducing themselves to the rest of Equestria. They looked a lot like the Lunar Stallions, to be honest, but came in all sizes, and in both genders.

The young colt that Grapes was talking to was trembling, and I could barely tell that she was talking. Grapes looked up at me, and then Earshot did, too. His yellow slitted eyes were fearful, obviously a hold-over from his encounter with Thatcher Hook.
I walked to him slowly and looked at the colt with a smile. I spoke to him in a gentle voice I usually reserve for when Tailspin had a nightmare "Hey, I'm Private Eye, you must be Earshot"

"Yes. Yes I am," he said, then took a deep breath. "Grapes says you're going to help her, not like that jerk, Thatcher Hook.”

I gave him a look over "You're awfully young to be so far away from home"

"Grandma sent me out to the Daylight Lands to see how the other ponies would accept Night Ponies," he said, with a smile. "It was a big job, and others felt they should do it, but everypony, back in Stygian Cove, listens to Grandma."

"I guess we both have awesome grandmas" I said with a laugh. I then kept my gentle demeanor as I said "Earshot, I need you to tell me everything about what happened last night"

"Well. I was keeping the bugs and rodents away from the grapes with my subsonics," Earshot started, sounding thoughtful. "Miss Grapes has me do night patrol, as long as I get enough sleep to not be drowsy in school. When I came back, I saw that Miss Grapes was gone."

Twilight gave him a long look "You mean, you eat bugs?"

"Well yes.” He answered “We kind of had to develop a flexible diet, during the difficult times after our fleeing from Equestria, after Nightmare Moon was banished."

Just so long as his lunch dosen't contain spiders we should be fine. "What did you do after that?"

"Well, I couldn't hear Stormfront in the Bunkhouse, so I went back out to take care of more bugs. Then I heard the crashes from the shed, flew back, heard somebody screaming, and that's when I saw..."

I smiled and reached into the pocket of my trench coat. I withdrew a small bag of cookies I was going to save for myself later. I put them in front of Earshot "Here, you'll feel better when you have some treats in your stomach"

The colt brightened up at the sight of the cookies. "Thank you very much," he chirped happily.

"Foals are foals, no matter what they look like," Grapes said with a chuckle. "You should have seen him when he was finally told about Nightmare Night."

I smiled "I have a brother his age, so I know what makes colts tick"

Earshot dug into one of the cookies and I went on "So, when was this?"

"Found them around two in the morning," Earshot said, after swallowing.

I nodded, "Keep the rest of the cookies" I then gave an affectionate rub of the
colt's mane "You deserved it for all that you've done to help"

"I hope you find who did it. Those three were finally coming around." Earshot said.

I nodded and stood to look at Sour "Grapes, can we talk for a minute?" I asked, the three of us left Earshot to his cookies and we got outside.

Twilight was the first to speak up "Care to tell us why you wouldn't tell us where you were last night?"

Sour Grapes’ face returned to a scowl "Do I pester you about what you and Private do, when you're off by yourselves?"

"Grapes" Twilight said, reaching a hoof for her "We're just trying to help..."

"I know. It's” She backed away from Twilight, her face betraying that she was hiding something “just a situation I'm not ready to share yet," Grapes said quietly. "I've still got to get my mind wrapped around it, myself."

"Grapes you're my friend" Twilight said, trying to be gentle "Surely we ca-"

"Argh! Cut it out!" Grapes snapped, then sighed. "Sorry, Twi. Just... give me a bit, okay."

With that, Sour ran back inside and slammed the door behind her.

Twilight looked down, guilt evident on her face.

"What's wrong Twi?" I asked.

She sighed "Sorry, it's just hard when a friend won't tell me what's wrong. Makes me feel like there’s more that I could do"

I smiled and put a hoof on her shoulder "Hey, it's okay, she'll come round eventually"

There was a foalish giggle off to the side. I looked over to see Earshot with his bag of cookies. Twilight and I blushed a little at having been caught by the colt. "Earshot, how long were you sitting there?" I asked, trying to contain my embarrassment.

"Not very long. I found something I thought you should look at... And honestly, it's nice," Earshot said with a smile. "Reminds me of Stormy and Miss Grapes, or Queenie and Dusty."

He then reached into his worker’s vest and pulled out something. "I found this in the trash," he said taking extra care with the object. The care was needed, it being a syringe. "I thought you should see it."

I looked over the syringe with a tentative eye. I read the label "Calcium Channel Blockers...it's a heart medication"

Twilight looked at Earshot "Do you know anypony here who has a bad heart?"

Earshot shook his head “Not that I know of”

"Alright then" I looked over at Twilight as I put the syringe in a plastic bag "We should head back to the office. See about calling up some places to see if Grapes has been to any of them. The sooner we can get grapes an alibi the better"

Just then Queenie trotted out from the Bunkhouse. At about the same time Sirocco came over from the Office.

"Here is that list of Stormy and Grapes' favorite spots," Queenie said, hoofing the list over. "Sorry it took so long, but there's a couple of places in Maneland, and Fullpint's tavern in Seaside, and I was looking up their numbers."

"Thanks a lot" I said, pocketing the list "We'll run these by the office and see what checks out"

I heard somepony clear their throat and turned to find Sirocco standing there, a small smile on her face and a list of her own.

"Also, I have found where the bottles were sold. One to a wineshop in Canterlot and one to a store in Fillydelphia," Sirocco said, giving Private a slip of paper with the names and phone numbers of each.

"Thank you all" I said, pocketing the list.

Twilight looked over at Queenie "Watch out for Sour okay? Something is really on her mind"

"I shall," Queenie said with a nod.

With that Twilight and I left the vineyard behind. I looked over at Twilight. I could tell she was still thinking about how Sour Grapes reacted. I pressed into her gently “Hey, you know sometimes you have to give friends some space”

She pressed back and smiled at me “Private, I want to say I’m proud of you. The old you would’ve just have gone along with Thatcher and attacked Sour Grapes for her flimsy at best alibi”

I slowly smiled “I, honestly have you to thank for that”

She smiled in turn and laid a kiss on my cheek “Come on, we got a friend to help”

With that, we walked down the path and ventured towards our office. Here’s hoping this case gets solved soon. Grapes may have been a hard pony, but her team cares about her deeply. I wanted to do my best to help bring their lives as back to normal as possible.

Twilight’s right…I really have changed…

Chapter 4 "Half"

Chapter 4

“Half”

The police arrived soon after and began checking the area where Earshot was kidnapped for clues.. Twilight and I began giving our statements to Officer Dunnit.

Dunnit nodded as we finished the story and said, “We’re looking over the area now. We found some powder left behind in the clearing and took samples of it. We'll be sending it over to the lab shortly.”

I nodded and replied, “I’d appreciate a part of the sample too, just in case I run into the criminal.”

“You got it,” he said with a salute. “Thank you for your statements. I'm going to get back to looking around.”

I left the uniform to his work and I noticed that Twilight was looking at me worriedly. I gave her a smile and said, “I’m fine, Twilight, really.”

She just smiled in turn and gave me a kiss on the nose. “Private, just be more careful from now on please,” she said with concern,

“I’ll try,” I replied, nuzzling her gently.

She gave a big yawn and pointed out, “It’s late. Spike’s probably going to try and stay up for hours past his bedtime if I don’t show up.”

“Alright,” I said with a smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, I wanna go and check on Grapes.”

“Again, Private, be careful,” she said, before laying one final kiss on my lips and walking out. Sweet Luna, I love that mare.

“Sir?”

I turned around and saw Officer Dunnit with a pair of plastic bags. One contained a sample of the powder left behind by the teleportation spells. The other bag contained a police badge.

“Where’d you find that?” I asked, putting the powder in my pockets and examining the badge.

“Found it where Twilight and Stormfront fought the masked pony, sir,” Dunnit answered “Once we’re done here I’m going to run the number by the station.”

“Thanks Dunnit,” I said, I couldn’t take the badge with me so I wrote down the number and gave it back to Dunnit. “You’ve been a great help.”

“Only doing my duty as you always say, sir,” Dunnit said, a firm look on his face.

I gotta recommend him for a promotion. I left the uniform and set off towards Grapevine Hills. A cop was involved in all this? I had a darks suspicion of which one it was.

___________________________________________________________

I arrived back at Grapevine Hills to find it mostly deserted. Luna's moon was shining full tonight and it provided decent light over the vineyard. I walked to the front gate to find Grapes sitting on the porch of the farmhouse, a book in front of her.
"Grapes?" I said, trying to get her attention.

"Hm?" Grapes said, looking up at me, and then yawning hugely. "What's up, Private?"

"I'm just coming to make sure you were okay," I said, walking to her. "What're ya reading?" I asked, pointing to the book.

"Crown Superior's new book. It's slightly better than the Dusk series, but only just," Grapes replied.

"Crown Superior?" I groaned "Don't tell me it's the same Crown Superior that made Vamponies sparkle!"

"Yeah. That's the one, trying her hoof at Science Fiction, this time, with a post-alien invasion story. So far it's angst and pathos," Grapes said critically.

"Only Crown Superior could ruin two great franchises and somehow make thousands of teenaged fans in the process," I replied, shaking my head.

"I know, right?" Grapes said with a smirk.

"As kind of a sci-fi nut I'm glad somepony shares that opinion," I said. She didn't have to know about my Nightmare Night costume of Malburn Raystar.

“So what brings you by at this time of night? I was about to hit the proverbial hay," Grapes asked, as she closed the book.

"Mostly just to check and make sure you were okay. I did kind of mess up attempting to catching that crook, and you suffered for it," I said, a guilty expression on my face.

"I'm better, now, thankfully. I've been managing this condition well enough. I just wasn't expecting the jolt to do that, honestly."

"That's good to hear, I still feel bad about not being able to stop you getting hurt though," I said, closing my grey eyes. "You can probably guess why that bolt affected me so much."

"You're a hybrid, right? Somehow I don't think you're half Earth Pony. You don't have the stamina, or the musculature."

“My mom was a pegasus," I explained, gesturing to my skinny legs. "I'm faster and slightly stronger than the average unicorn. Downside is, I have very little resistance to any form of magic."

“That would be my father,” she answered. “My parents met in Canterlot, and fell in love, much to my Grandmother's chagrin."

“Grandfather for me," I said with a smile.

"We've both got good taste in literature, and tribalist grandparents. Wonder what else we may have in common that we don't know about?"

"Well, you aren't an element of harmony, a detective, or dating Celestia’s student so those are out, " I joked.

And you're not a winemaker, who can make almost anything into a somewhat drinkable alcoholic beverage, and an honorary member of the Storm Riders, so that's out, too. How good a dancer are you?"

"Well, Raiden may have taught me a few moves back when we lived in Manhattan," I said with a smile. "You play any instruments?"

"Does a washboard count?"

I shrugged "I guess we have a little in common"

"I may be a better dancer than you are, though. I can keep up with a pegasus who took aero-dance classes, and impressed the indomitable Vinyl Scratch so much that I got a permanent VIP pass," Grapes said thoughtfully. "I could have gotten a cutie mark in dancing, if I had been a late bloomer."

I laughed a little "So, is it really true you can make wine out of anything?"

"I refuse to make wine out of alfalfa," Grapes said.

"Well, I'm willing to try any wine that isn't made out of Pineapples," I said, disgusted by the notion.

"My most popular is Summer Sunrise," Grapes said with a smile. "It's made out of watermelon."

"Remind me to ask for a bottle once all this is over," I said, smiling. "Though I gotta ask, how do you handle the work when you're only half earth pony?"

Grapes took on a tone I was familiar with Twilight having. "I use a meditation from a book by Starswirl the Bearded to balance my magic between the innate Earth Pony magics, and the overt unicorn magics. Most hybrids do this unconsciously, deciding they'd rather be one or the other, but I chose balance, because I needed the earth sense."

"Do you think you could teach me it?" I asked, this could really help in future cases if I could tap fully into my unicorn half. I'd never have to worry about losing to a magician again!

"Well, hm… I suppose I could. It IS a meditation, so it takes time. I'll start you first with The Breath of the World to put you in touch with your Pegasus side," Grapes said thoughtfully. "By honoring, and acknowledging both sides of your heritage it makes it easier to balance things."

"Alright," I said, sitting on my haunches as she walked to sit beside me. I then closed my eyes and cleared my mind as she went on.

"Actually you need to stand up," Grapes said. "Head up, leaning slightly forward, like into a wind. Clear your mind, and think of the wind blowing over the world. How it moves and cycles."

I did as she instructed. It took a minute but slowly I felt it. The wind itself was blowing around me as if I was flying. I felt like I could take off on wings I didn't have. I felt lighter than air... why did I feel a strange sensation on my back?

I felt my back and it felt like something should… oh…that's why. It was probably using parts where wings should be. But me being wingless, that didn't help.

“Now sit down slowly," Grapes said. "You are part pegasus, and honor that part of you. It will always be a part of you, but now you must imagine that part at one end of a balance board. The other end has your unicorn self. You are in the center, and can move either one up or down. Now concentrate on your horn, and feel the power flowing through it. You want to slowly move your balance toward your unicorn self, while feeling the power flowing through your horn."

I slowly sat down as instructed. My horn glowed a pale grey as I concentrated on it. I felt it! In my mind's eye I was slowly walking towards my unicorn side. I felt my magic flowing better than it ever...

Suddenly I turned around in my mind’s eye. I saw my mother was crying. I can't! I can't leave that part of myself behind! I just... I opened my eyes and breathed heavily as my magic faded. I looked down at the ground, feeling terrible for having failed.

“What's wrong?" Grapes asked as my breathing came under control.

"I...I couldn't do it," I admitted.

"Oh?" Grapes asked. "Hm... You may have been going a bit too fast."

"I just didn't want to leave that part of myself behind," I said slowly. "When I wanted to cross over I just couldn't."

"You and your mother must have been very close," Grapes observed.

"Yeah," I said with a small smile. "She and I were pretty close alright. She gave up her career as an actress to raise me full time. She was the pony I went to whenever I was afraid or worried.” I closed my grey eyes and said sadly, "But, not anymore."

"You have my condolences," Grapes said quietly. "I'm lucky that I still have my parents. Especially with my Grandmother trying to ruin them, and me."

"You are lucky," I said. "Just, spend as much time with them as you can. Cause, no matter how much of a pain they can be. Your parents should be among the top three ponies you care about the most"

"There are some things I'd rather not see them doing, thanks." She smiled in turn.

"Grapes," I said, giving the vineyard owner a smile, "thanks for trying to help out. Something tells me there's more to this if I work at it."

"There is," Grapes said. "It's all a matter of how you think of altering your balance. Don't think about it as 'leaving it behind'."

"Right," I said, "Well, I'd better get going home. Tailspin'll be wondering what I'm doing out so late and try to snag some cookies."

"Wait, wait, wait, Tailspin?” she said in confusion. “Cute little colt, with a massive crush on Scootaloo, Tailspin?” She gave a small smile “I may have helped him a bit. Gave him some advice, told him the right sorts of things to say to her."

"Well, it certainly helped, thank you." I laughed a little.

"Good to know. I was wondering if I had helped."

"Well, thanks for helping my little brother out"

"My pleasure."

“Just make sure that none of your other female members get a hold of him." I gave a slight chuckle. "He has a habit of worming his way into everypony's hearts."

"I'll be sure to warn them," Grapes chuckled.

With that I left the vineyard pony and walked into the night. It’s been a very long day and I was hoping to catch some sleep. Still, I had a very dark suspicion who could’ve left that police badge. The question is, what was a noble doing with a detective?
__________________________________________________________

“It just seems silly to me” Tailspin said over breakfast the next morning. He took a bite of his oats and swallowed “Why would a detective be so worried about his reputation that he would kidnap Earshot?”

“For a noble, reputation is everything. It’s like popular kids at school. They’ll do anything they can to preserve their place in the status quo. That’s why you get a lot of nobles that seem to have never left the high school mindset,” I said sagely.

“Grown-ups worry about the stupidest things,” Tailspin said with a shake of his head. Just wait till you’re a teenager buddy.

I finished up my hay bacon just as the phone rang. I levitated it to my ear and said, “Eye Residence.”

“Detective! We got a hit on the badge!”

“Dunnit?” I said, detective mode on. “Who’s was it?”

“Sir! It was Detective Thatcher’s badge! I sent a squad out at about three in the morning to find him. We found out he was about to board a train to Hoofington.”

“Sounds like he was skipping town,” I said darkly. “That alone puts him in the hot seat. Do you have him now?”
“Yes Sir! He’s at the detention center right now!”

“Keep him there and stall the lawyers as long as you can,” I ordered as I hung up the phone. I looked over at Tailspin and gave a guilty look. “I’m sorry for leaving you so early, buddy.”

Tailspin gave a smile. “It’s okay, I know your work is important. I’ll just call Sparkler or something if you need somepony to watch me.”

I smiled and rubbed the colt’s blue mane. He laughed as I said, “Since when did you start growing up?”

“Well somepony has to hold down the fort while you go charging into cases,” Tailspin said, smiling at me, and then his face turned serious. “Be careful, bro, I know how bad it can get.”

“I’ll be fine, Tailspin,” I said with a smile and walked out. I opened the door and found a familiar chocolate colored unicorn standing at my front door. “Grapes? What are you doing here?”

"Looking for you, actually," Grapes said, and then looked past me to Tailspin. "Hey, Tailspin."

Tailspin gave a wave before I looked back at Grapes "I was on my way to the detention center."

“You guessed that was his badge?" I deduced.

"Not many police detectives would have a badge that fancy," Grapes said. "Not even those from Canterlot."

"Grapes," I stated firmly "As much as you may want to know what happened. I cannot have you in that interrogation room. I cannot risk you losing it."

Grapes adjusted her glasses and said firmly, “I just want to know why me. He was so intent upon framing me for this horrible crime, and I really want to know why. Is that too much to ask?"

"No it's not," I said, "Just stay out of the room, but you will be allowed to listen in if I ask."

"Sounds good," she said with a nod.

With that we walked side by side to the detention center.
______________________________________________________

"I DEMAND to see my lawyer, you low born, thin-blooded, thick-headed twit!" Thatcher ever so tactfully said as I stared at him.

I sat across from Thatcher in an interrogation room. The unicorn struggling as I insisted he be hoof cuffed. That was more out of personal reasons then any reason of security. I tried to keep my emotions in check as I said, "You are in no position to be making demands. Your lawyer will be here soon. Until then, you have me for enjoyable company.

"I'd rather be taken out and shot. It's filth like you that's causing the trouble in Equestria, today. Half-breed thugs are nothing but a menace."

"Blood matters little when you're caught red hoofed attempting to kidnap a colt. On top of that your badge was found at the scene of the crime. To lose a badge while on the force is a death sentence for one’s career. You wouldn't just drop it because it slipped from your pocket."

"And you have no proof that it didn't just fall out of my pocket, you half-breed idiot. You just let your malformed brain assume it was because I struggled with that whelp."

I smirked "Thank you for telling me that you struggled with somepony. That explains..." I walked beside him and slapped him on the back. He visibly winced and let out a gasp of pain. "Courtesy of Stormfront, you have bruising all over your back from when he hit you."

"Damned chicken,” he spat. “Pegasi should not be so damned big."

"So not only do you admit you were there," I said, darkly "but you also admit that you got hit by Stormfront. That pegs you as the kidnapper. But the question is, why did you murder the victims? Don’t try and talk your way out of it."

I levitated out one of the syringes. “Recognize this, it was the murder weapon. Used to kill Maribell and Tree Binder by overdosing them.” My horn glowed grey and the syringe glowed green…as well as Thatcher. “Powder from your magic and your dna are also on the wine bottles used to hit both of them. This proves that you are the only pony who could’ve murdered them, the question is… why?”

Thatcher caved under my glare. He was sweating like crazy; there was no way he was going to be able to talk his way out of this. He had been caught saying about the job.

Finally he said, "They were going to come clean to that filthy dirt-grubber with a horn about the deal. They were sent there to get dirt on that worthless dirt-fornicator."

“They were looking for dirt on Grapes? They were also hoping to create dirt, judging by the equipment found."

"Yes. They were going to ruin that hybrid's reputation, by making it look like her major orders were of a sub-grade product, and they were looking for some scandal to splash across the paper."

"And they didn't go through with it?"

"No. Damn it, WHY is that hybrid so damned intelligent? The merging of pure unicorn and worthless dirt humper should have made her feebleminded at best!"

"You also stated to your partner you wanted to restore your family's reputation. I found an interesting tidbit when I looked into some old newspapers...does the headline 'Marilyn Hook marries again' ring any bells?" At that his eyes went wide. "Your mother remarried back when you were my age. Her proud groom? An Earth Pony farmer she married for love..."

Thatcher just snapped…

"HOW COULD SHE LOVE HIM?! HOW COULD SHE ABANDON HER HERITAGE FOR SOME DIRT GRUBBING MUDLICKING JACKAPPLEING DUST PONY?!"

"Your jig is up Thatcher."

Thatcher then grinned evilly at me.

"And you, the flighty offspring of a chicken, and a unicorn. Can't do proper magic, and can't fly, either. Fenlock must have made you his successor out of pity, because it can't have been for your skill!"

He's treading on very...dangerous ground...

There was a knock on the interrogation room door. I gave a glare at Thatcher and then stepped outside. I saw Grapes standing there and she whispered, "I thought I should intervene." She then nodded toward the lobby.

"Just give me a minute,” I said. “I need to interrogate him just a little bit more. Something doesn’t add up, why did he kill Parsley two hours later?”

"Maybe he didn't," Grapes said, thoughtfully. "You need to do a DNA scan on Parsley, and see if it matches Thatcher, to find out for sure. His ire seems to be directed at Earth Ponies, and their hybrids. So better check to see if he did it, first, before throwing accusations around."

"You're right," I let a breath out. "I just, wanted to throttle the guy back there. Especially when he said that I didn't earn this." I pulled my fedora off my head and looked at it.

"So, Fenlock is your mentor? That gives me extra confidence in your abilities, if not your ability to keep things objective," Grapes chuckled. "Then I think even he would not have liked being personally insulted."

"He gave me this." I gestured to my fedora. "On the day I told him I made homicide. He never took it off for as long as I'd known him. It was passed down to him from his mentor. He taught me everything I know about being a detective. It was like…he was, the grandfather I never really had," I said wistfully.

"We both have disappointing grandparents it seems,” she said, a sympathetic smile on her face.

I gave a small smile. "Grandpa Eye never really cared for me. He would show up and tolerate my existence at reunions but that was it. With Fenlock, for the first time in my life I had somepony to truly look up to aside from my parents. He was everything I wanted to be as a detective. Confident, strong, and smart when it came to solving cases." I gave a sigh and continued, "Some days, I tend to think like Thatcher, that maybe I didn't deserve to have him as my mentor."

"You did,” she said firmly. “Just think of all the good you've done."

I looked at her, taking in her words.

"IF you hadn't had him as your mentor, you'd have had one of those lazy lagabouts who are happy with any suspect, as long as they have one, uncaring about their guilt or innocence."

"You're right," I said, "It's no wonder Twilight has a lot of faith in you. As do your crew."

Grapes gave a small smile. "What can I say? I just do my best, and muddle through. I know Equestria would be a worse place, without you putting what you learned from Fenlock to good use."

"Grapes," I said, giving her a look, "if you don't mind delving into something? You mentioned you had a disappointing grandparent too?"

"Yeah. Pave Diamond. My grandmother. She disowned my mother for marrying an Earth Pony," Grapes said. "Doesn't help that she's a tribalist witch who thinks unicorns should be ruling Equestria, with the other two tribes as slaves to the unicorns." Grapes rolled her eyes.

"Wait, that does sound familiar," I said. "Does she have a Canterlot accent?"

"Well yeah, since she lives in Canterlot," Grapes said with a nod.

"Sort of like Thatcher's employer?" I said ominously, and then I reached into my trench coat and pulled out the brooch. "This fell off her as she was running away."

Grapes took the brooch, and looked at it for a long time. She took a deep breath and sighed, rubbing her head. "I thought Thatcher's partner sounded incredibly familiar."

Chapter 5 "Red Gold"

Chapter 5
“Red Gold”

“Private, this has gotta be the craziest idea you’ve ever given me!” Shine Badge growled over the phone “You were pushing it with Blueblood and Hoity Toity, but Pave Diamond is a contributing member of society. She's donated to the widows and orphans fund. She's personally contributed at least half the retiring officers' pensions, and donated a lot of money for the renovation of the stations and jails!”

“That doesn’t matter anymore, Shine Badge!” I fired back. “She set this whole thing up! She was the pony who was in the forest!”

“It was dark and unless you had a recording device on you I doubt you’ll convince a jury it was her.”

“I have Thatcher’s confession!” I said stubbornly.

“Which will send him to jail and you have got motive and opportunity. That’s no excuse to go bucking down somepony’s door!”

“I can’t believe you’re not helping me with this!”

“Private, do you honestly think I wanna let this happen? You never think long term! You realize I still get nobles threatening me for that stunt you pulled with Blue Blood? Never mind what you did to your own uncle!”

“Badge, I need to do this! I’m doing what’s right!”

“And who are you to say that? What? You think you take down some villains and you think you’re better than everypony else? You haven’t changed a bit.”

“Badge, if you don’t get me a warrant… I’m willing to give a repeat performance…”

“You can forget about getting any help from me. I’m not going down with the ship if you turn out to be wrong.”

With that he hung up…

That no good, dirty rotten, cowardly pig of a cop just hung up on me!

I felt a hoof on my back and looked over at Twilight. I sighed and let go of my anger. “No luck, Badge won’t give us reinforcements, we’re on our own.”

We were standing outside as I walked out of the phone booth. After the argument with Shine Badge I felt a little bit of guilt inside. I didn’t mean to threaten him like that. I just couldn’t believe he would just turn a blind eye to this. He’s the one that hasn’t changed.

“Private,” Twilight said “We’ll face Pave together, just like always.”

“You really think I’m right about this?” I asked, looking at Twilight. “What if it turns out I’m wrong?”

Twilight shook her head and relied, “Private, I trust you above anypony else I know. If you believe that Pave is dirty, then so do I.”

“Thanks,” I said with a smile.

All right," Grapes said trotting up to us, "we're going to Canterlot, right?"

“Grapes," I said, as I looked at her with concern, "odds are Pave is expecting us, she's probably going to have body guards."

"Let me guess, the police won't do a bloody thing, right?" Grapes deadpanned.

"I could send a letter to Princess Celestia, but that may take time," Twilight said, putting a hoof on her chin.

I shook my head and replied, "It'll take too long, they won’t be sending backup so we’re on our own”

We're coming with you," Stormfront said, as he was followed by the rest of the Storm Riders, and Dusty. They all stood in front of Grapes as if they were an army. Judging by Grape’s expression however, she was reluctant to send them.

"What? No! I need you to keep an eye on the vineyard. It shouldn't be left unsupervised." Grapes said quickly.

"But, Grapes, you're going to need back-up! You know that witch has private guards!" Stormfront said adamantly.

"He's right, Grapes," Queenie said. "Even I know she can't seem to go anywhere without somepony watching her back... Paranoid old biddy."

"You can't go. I swear if I have to bring Lady Weathervane in on this, I will," Grapes said threateningly.

That shut them up. The pony in charge of the Royal Equestrian Rogue Weather Emergency Response Team was not one to be trifled with, and the Storm Riders knew it.

They walked away, and Grapes turned to follow Twilight as they made their way to the train station, looking a bit guilty. I watched the Storm Riders, though. They seemed to be having a conference, and Earshot and Dusty were sent back toward the Vineyard. I saw Icestorm look at me, and she mimed a zipping motion over her mouth.

I nodded and began following the girls towards the train station. I wanted to tell Grapes personally, but I knew it wouldn't help much. It seems Grapes has inspired more loyalty in them then she realizes.

I can relate...
_____________________________________________________________

The skies wept heavily, and only the weather teams knew what for, as we trotted through the high end quarter of Canterlot. The street lamps providing only a feeble light in the gloom, and of course Grapes had to add her own commentary on the situation.

"Ah, Atmosphere,” she said. “Of course for a climatic confrontation, there simply has to be rain."

Twilight and I rolled our eyes as we rounded Canterlot Lane and came to where Grapes said the mansion would be.

"Ostentatious, isn't it?" Grapes asked, as we looked at the gaudy example of architecture. It was like it was a monument to bad taste, with ugly statues adorning the grounds leading up to it. The place also had various diamonds carved into the pillars. For once, I wouldn’t feel bad for Voidera eating gems off something. "The things that ponies spend money on,” Grapes said with a shake of her head. “It's almost criminal."

I looked around and didn't see any guards patrolling the entrance or grounds. "Looks clear, let's go." We walked to the entrance and I knocked hard on the oak door. "Pave Diamond! Open up!” I yelled.

I heard a voice on the other side say, "You lot to the servant's entrance."

"Excuse me?" I said incredulously.

"Servant's entrance. All police officers, especially low-born ones are to report to the service entrance. They are 'public servants', after all. Madam Diamond's rules. You're obviously new, and don't know this."

I just about had enough. I was sick and tired of being told what I couldn't do by some ponies who think they can get away with murder. I turned and bucked the door open.

"What is the meaning of this!" the butler yelled as I walked in. He was clad in a suit and looked very cross. "You have NO right to just bust in here like some animal!"

I glared at him as Twilight and Grapes flanked me. "I demand to see Pave Diamond this instant," I demanded. The butler started sweating under my gaze. "I've had a very bad day and I don't think you want to prolong it."

"Take us to her," Twilight demanded, "or else I'll get my brother to tear this place apart."

"Tell Pave that Sour Grapes is here to see her," I said, with a glare.

"THE Sour Grapes?" the butler’ asked, jaw dropping.

Grapes rolled her eyes. “No, ‘A’ Sour Grapes, I come to-“

Suddenly Twilight’s eyes went wide. “What?! Don’t tell me you found the Mirror Po-“

“Twilight,” Grapes said, regretting her decision.

Twilight suddenly looked panicked. “We covered the entrance with a huge rock, and everything!"

“Twilight!” Grapes said a little louder.

"Because having that many Pinkie Pies was bad enough, but---"

"TWILIGHT!"

"What?"

"It was a joke," Grapes said and then met my look of confusion “"Please tell me you've read the 'Trailtrotter' Series."

I rolled my eyes and looked back at the butler. "Like I said, take us to Pave Diamond now!"

"I'm so fired over this," the butler grumbled as he trotted off.

The butler then led us into a large and spacious living room. The living room was lavishly appointed, with a very expensive glass ceiling. Good for star gazing or weather watching, I would suppose, if it was not simply being used as a status symbol.The unicorn mare inside it was sitting on a couch. She may have been a beauty at one time with a light blue coat and a mane that had turned grey but showed traces of blonde.

"What's the meaning of this?" the older unicorn demanded. She had a sour, pinched-in sort of face, with this air of arrogance about her.

"Oh, I'm sure you know," Grapes uttered.

"Still bitter about your experience at the Gala? You should be glad I made sure you knew your place," Pave shot back.
"Eh. I got over that a long time ago," Grapes replied.

"And this is the upstart, that's trying to jail all of the nobility? Good job on that jumped up dirt-grubber, but you went too far with the Prince, you watered down excuse for a unicorn," Pave said disdainfully

"Pave Diamond, I'm placing you under arrest for the attempt at sabotage of Grapes' business. As well” I narrowed my grey eyes “As the murder of Parsley"

"How tiresome” She said with sheer snobbery “You really think you can arrest your betters, fool?"

Twilight fumed "Private has done far more for Equestria then you've ever done you pompous old hag!"

That’s my marefriend.

"Ah. Yes. The Mutt's pet. Why you weren't taught proper unicorn manners is beyond me," Pave uttered, looking down her muzzle at Twilight.

"Oh... fewmits, now she's done it," Grapes muttered.

"You dare!" Twilight's nostrils flared "Not only do you insult the pony I love, but you have the absolute gall to insult Princess Celestia! If being a true unicorn means being like you, then I'd rather saw off my own horn! I'd rather be an earth pony without my magic than to be a pompous, ugly, fat, waste of space like you! You complete and utter bitch!"

Twilight swore. She was definitely mad. I stepped forward and said, "What do you have to say for yourself Pave Diamond, aside from your thoughts about Princess Celestia."

"I don't have to explain a damn thing to you, you lowborn piece of fecal matter," Pave said contentiously. "You cannot touch me."

"Am I supposed to be scared of you? After all, what have you done in your life time? Grapes here has gotten an entire vineyard together and she seems to be doing very well. In fact, a little too well for your liking…"

"Only because her dirt-fornicating father stole my daughter. She was supposed to be married to an upstanding unicorn noble. And what does she do? She runs off with a dirt-grubber!" Pave growled.

"Never mind Mom was happier with Dad, than she ever was in this monument to horrible taste," Grapes quipped.

"Then it must've been such a shock when it turns out Grapes is more successful then you ever were," I said venomously. "So, you looked for a detective desperate enough to aid in your scheme. Thatcher was the perfect candidate because of his mother marrying an earth pony. So, you planned to finally strike out at Grapes. You hired three ponies to work as temps for Grapes, but in reality they were spies for you. Then two days ago your plan was put into action. All three of them were sent to the vineyard in the hopes of sabotaging the place, pesticides, watering powder, anything to destroy the place. But...you underestimated Grapes' ability..."

Pave's eye began twitching as her face contorted in anger.

"You do know the Canterlot police are on their way to arrest you for breaking and entering," Pave said, frowning. "You have no proof, and your piece of paper is worthless, here."

"I'm not done" I growled.

"Yes. You are. You, and the Mutt's Pet, and that worthless half-breed are going to jail, to never bother the nobility again!"

I ignored her. "Everything was going according to plan but you wanted to send Thatcher as insurance." I went on, "So, Thatcher arrived and met Tree Binder and Maribell. They decided they weren't going to go through with it. They said they were going to come clean but Thatcher knew that he would be ruined if he was found out. So he murdered them both and fled, he then tried to pin the blame on Grapes here."

"Once he was gone, he informed you of what happened. You prepared to make sure the police wouldn't assign anypony else. However, you learned that Parsley didn't arrive until two hours later. So then you killed him by using your magic to impale him on the weather vane."

"What proof do you have, you worthless watered-down unicorn, that I was even involved?" she asked with scorn.

"Exhibit A," I said as I levitated a small evidence bag out of my trench coat. "The powder found on Parsley's forelegs as he was pulled down. Exhibit B" I pulled another sample of Powder "The powder found on the unicorn that talked to Thatcher when he kidnapped Earshot...Exhibit C..." I levitated out the brooch "The brooch left behind by said partner..."

My horn glowed a pale grey and all three of the pieces of evidence glowed green, as well as Pave. You can't argue with DNA. No matter what the court, they can’t ignore hard evidence like this. You’ve lost…"

Pave growled, her face contorting in an ugly manner. "GUARDS!"

Grapes’ face turned into a rather estranged expression. "Okay. I know you hate me, and I'm not too fond of you, either, but I wasn't doing anything to harm you, or your fortune. Why in the bloody blue blazes did you decide to do this now?" she asked.

"Why? Because you were doing TOO well! You even had the ear of the Mutt! Your letters to the crowned cross-breeds are common knowledge, and you having royal commissions, AND providing the Garden Party with wine? You were showing everypony that bloodlines don't matter!"

Grapes’ eyes showed pure rage. "News flash, you old nag, THEY DON'T!"

"Your success, and this chicken-breed's successes, would mean the end of the nobility!" Pave screamed.

"Then nothing of value would be lost," Grapes snarled right back.

"Pave Diamond," I said, stepping forward, "I'm going to give you one chance. Come clean, and face the sentence like a good mare and I’m sure the police would be willing to cut a deal. But if you do anything rash, I can't be responsible for what could happen. With this evidence the cops will put you under arrest for corruption, murder and whatever the hell else I can get them. Now take it or leave it..."

Pave laughed evilly. "I won't take it, and you lot will be leaving! You were a fool to come here, and like fools, you'll be put in chains!"

Suddenly about a dozen guards ran in. They were all unicorns and armed with pistols. They aimed it at the three of us. Twilight glared at Pave. "Don't think you'll get away with this Pave!"

"I told you I was untouchable, you idiots!" Pave gloated, laughing manically.

"I'm sorry about this, guys. I thought this was going to end well for us, and now we're probably going to end up in some Tribist's private dungeon," Grapes uttered. "I should have let Stormy and the others come with..."

Twilight smiled at her friend "Grapes, it's okay, we'll get through this. If we go down, we go down as friends,"
I smiled at Twilight. "Right, we'll make sure you don't get taken away" I pulled out Blackbird "Twilight and I will get their attention, you make a break for it..."

"You know, you guys are crazy for doing this, right?" Grapes asked, before levitating a nearby dining table so we could have some cover.

"Now I get to prove the superiority of the pure unicorn race, and rid the land of two pieces of filth." Pave uttered smirking. "We pure unicorns will RULE Equestria, and put those other two tribes in their place, just as our ancestors should have done!"

Still would have been windegos, you witch!" Grapes couldn't help but snark back. Suddenly, the ceiling exploded downward, sending shards everywhere. Pave screamed, and ducked under another of those heavy wooden tables.
As the glass clattered to the floor I saw several shapes swoop in from the rain. The guards fired blindly as I saw the shapes fly around. I levitated the table to me and pulled Twilight and Grapes behind it. I looked to a pillar on my right as ponies were shooting. There was Stormfront and Firestormer hiding behind the pillar for cover. I looked to my left and saw Queenie, Squall and Sirocco doing the same behind another pillar.

"What... I... Where'd they come from?!" Grapes asked, looking stunned.

I peeked over my cover and ducked before my hat could get hit by a symphony of bullets. I caught a glimpse of Pave making a break for the stairs as the bodyguards advanced. "Anypony have any bright ideas?” I asked. “I could use some thank you"

"Get those guards down!" Grapes shouted.

"Pave's getting away!" Stormfront shouted in turn.

"Aye aye, Cap'in!" Squall yelled.

Grapes' eyes looked up at the rain falling through the broken ceiling onto three of the guards. From above, three snowballs beaned the guards, and Icestorm came flying in. The guards fell as they were hit hard. Grapes gestured something to Icestorm and the pegasus began flapping her wings like crazy, bringing a cold air onto them. The wet guards suddenly shivered in the cold wind and passed out. The water made it so they had little protection from it. Icestorm then flew back behind her pillar as the other nine guards shot at her.

"I hate to disrupt the weather team's work," Grapes uttered, "but it's for a good cause. Use the storm clouds to subdue the rest of those guards!"

Storm nodded and flew straight up, Firestormer at his side. They took some of the storm clouds and flew back down with them. I took some shots at the guards to keep their attention on us. Storm and Firestormer then kicked their clouds, sending down lightning bolts that zapped four of the guards.

I took some shots and hit a guard in the leg, taking him out of commission "I think we can break through, but we need some cover!"

"Sirocco, whip up a windstorm, for us, please," Grapes called.

The Arabian Pony flapped her wings and the wind built up so fast a cloud of dust and glass covered us. I looked to Twilight and Grapes "Come on!" The girls followed me as we made for the stairs. One of the guards came out of the dust and aimed his gun at Grapes. But then Squall came out of nowhere and tackled him full force.

We followed the stairs and left the fighting behind. Using the glamour spell we followed Pave's DNA until we reached the roof. We all stood and watched as Pave turned around to face us. I levitated Blackbird and aimed it at Pave. "It's over Pave Diamond!" I called.

Suddenly Pave reached into her dress and pulled out a strange syringe. She laughed and said evilly, “A little gift from a friend of mine, this won’t turn me into a mongrel. However, it will give me more than enough power to kill you all!!!” She stabbed it into her leg and her horn glowed brightly.

I fired a shot at her but the bullet grazed a shield she brought up. She then fried a magic bolt at us and Twilight threw up a barrier. It just barely managed to hold it off. Grapes and I hid behind the cover as Twilight tried to keep Pave's continuing bolts at bay. "I can't hold her much longer!" Twilight said, her voice strained.

"Okay, enough of this," Grapes growled. She lifted a heavy stone urn with her levitation and sent it barreling right at Pave. Suddenly I could see how easily she could have given an overweight stallion the boot over her gate. The effort was futile, however, because the urn shattered on Pave's own shield.

I fired the last of my bullets at Pave and swore as they had no effect. Just how was she getting this power? Where did she get it more like? My thoughts were cut off as a huge blast from Pave sent all three of us flying. I fell to the ground next to Twilight as Pave laughed.

"You three thought you were a match for me? ME! I OWN the police, here, and practically all the Nobles, too." She laughed but then I saw Grapes get up, a trickle of blood on her face and her glasses were cracked from the impact.

"And yet, you still can't get them to take you out on a date, can you, you withered old prune?" she said, her horn glowing a little.

I stood up and faced her, "Pave, you may say you own the police, you may say you own the nobles. But there is one thing you can never own. That is our will to stand up to ponies like you."

Grapes and I stood together and Twilight as well. I looked at them both "We've only got one shot at this girls; put everything you got into them. Grapes and I may be hybrids, but two half-bloods can make one full unicorn. We can overpower her if we hit her with everything we've got!"

All three of our horns glowed as we fired our blasts at Pave. The three beams formed into one and Pave tried to put up a shield to defend herself. But her shield cracked under the onslaught and the beams broke through and hit her square in the chest. She went down for the count, her power gone.

When it was over I slumped against Twilight as my energy was drained. I watched as Grapes walked to her unconscious grandmother, looking rather worse for the wear.

I walked to her weakly, using Twilight for support. I levitated Grapes' glasses off her nose. I used what little magic I had left to use Dad's repairing spell on it. The glass healed like a cut and I gave them back to her. "It's over Grapes, now she can finally be put where she belongs. Be proud you aided in doing something great"

"True,” she said as she put her glasses back on. “Never mind Dusty won't have to worry about her trying to ruin his relationship with Queenie."

The Storm Riders came flying up to the roof, surrounding Grapes. Stormy embraced Grapes, who returned it, smiling.
I walked to Pave and laid the cuffs on her. I looked back as the other Storm Riders joined in a group hug. They fought like a family together. Grapes, you really have something special here. May it always be this way for you.

Epilogue

The rain was starting to lighten up as I explained the story to the police when they arrived. They weren’t so keen to lock me up once they heard about the evidence I had. They were however, in for a rough ride as Pave regained consciousness. I felt sorry for the two unfortunate officers dragging her out. She wasn't exactly the lightest weight of ponies, in the first place, and the officers struggled mightily to bring the old nag along.

"WHAT is the meaning of this?" Pave screeched. "Unhoof me this instant! ARREST THOSE THREE! They broke into MY house, threatened ME, and destroyed my property! Get those mangy pegasi, too! Well? HOP TO IT! What in Tartarus do I PAY you for? Take these horrid things off my hooves!"

Officer Frisk, who was aiding Dunnit in pulling her over to a nearby police carriage, rolled his eyes and said coldly, "Save it for the judge, lady, and thanks for confessing to bribing officers as well."

Dunnit shook his head and added, "Whatever testimony you had just lost all credibility. I hope you look good in stripes."

Pave looked around, startled. "Where are the Noble Quarter officers? Who brought you commoners in?"

"I figured you would just try to bribe ponies, so I had Twilight send a letter before we arrived," I said, with a slight smirk. "Twilight, read aloud the letter, please."

"Gladly," Twilight replied smiling innocently. She unfolded her letter, an umbrella keeping it from getting wet, and began, "Dear Princess Celestia, I wish to inform you that Pave Diamond was involved in the attempted sabotage of your good friend, Sour Grapes. She's also bribed ponies of the noble quarter police force to do her dirty work. Please take any actions you deem necessary."

Twilight looked up and smiled at Pave rather smugly. "It helps when you have the ear of the princess. You're lucky I left out several of your comments," she told the enraged noble pony.

"Once that was done, it was simple matter of requesting the officers we desired to come here," I explained. "Two ponies that I know will get glowing reviews from me." Dunnit and Frisk smiled with pride at my praise.

"Oh, I'm going to be writing her a letter all about them," Grapes said with a big smile. "The longer you're in prison, the longer Uncle Cabochon will be in charge, and the longer he's in charge, the less support your tribalist friends will be getting."

"WHAT?" Pave cried.

"What can I say? I'm just a little bit vindictive. You tried to ruin my life, frame me for murder, and all because I was smarter than you thought I should be," Grapes observed. "I feel no reason not to return the favor."

"Dunnit, Frisk," I said to the uniforms "take this waste of space away."

Dunnit and Frisk smiled at me. "With pleasure, Sir," Frisk said, as they began loading her into the police wagon.

"You can't DO this to me!” Pave screeched as she was pushed inside. “We unicorns deserve to rule this country! RULE, not be some LAPDOG to a MUTT with CHICKEN WINGS!"

"Yeah. That's really going to convince them," Grapes said sarcastically.

Dunnit and Frisk slammed the doors shut, muting Pave's angry screeches.

Twilight groaned and said, "Finally, I thought we'd never get her to shut up."

Frisk then walked to me and said somewhat awkwardly, "The uh, Chief wanted to see you, Detective."

I nodded and replied, "Right, I'll go check up on him." I then walked tentatively towards where Shinebadge stood waiting.
The white earth pony was looking more cross than usual. As I walked up to the leader of the ERPD I noticed, it was Shinebadge who had a guilty look on his face.

“Shinebadge,” I said with a sigh, “I know you must’ve had your hooves tied. We both said some things we regretted.”

“Ya just can’t ever seem to listen,” Shinebadge said, shaking his head “A lot of ponies are going to be unhappy that Pave Diamond is locked up, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t glad you didn’t listen to me.”

“Badge, there was something else I found out,” I said, reaching into my pocket and pulled out a set of letters. “If found some correspondence between Pave and some of the officers she bribed,” I said as I held out the papers to him.

“Going to do a repea-“ He cut himself off when he saw the list on top only contained two names. “There’s only two?” he asked surprised.

“The other three were good cops I knew,” I said, unable to meet his eyes. “Dunnit and Frisk told me they were good ponies. They had families and such that needed the money. I informed them of Pave’s downfall and they’ll start cleaning up their act. It wasn’t worth destroying their lives to satisfy justice.”

“Ya really have changed. The Private I remember would never have done this. I’ll keep an eye on them, and make sure they know where it stands,” he said, narrowing his eyes. I almost felt a little sorry for them.

“Badge,” I said deciding to get something else off my chest, “look, I’m sorry for-“

“Ya ain’t got nothin' tah be sorry for,” Shinebadge said. “You stood up to me when I was in the wrong. I should’ve just lent you help when you asked for it, but I was too damned worried that you were pushing things too far.”

There were no words I could say for how I felt right now. Shinebadge, the most hard ass pony I know, was apologizing to me.

He looked at me with guilty eyes and said, “Private, you and Fenlock were the best cops I’ve ever had in my career. I know I’m not the best cop in the world anymore. Its guys like you and Fenlock that get cases solved right. You didn’t care what status your dirt bag had. You just knew she did something evil, and she had to be stopped for it. What did I do? I spouted out the party line and tried to make it look like I didn’t care. However, you went and did the right thing, even when I turned ya down. So, I've decided to make some changes.”

“Badge?” I studied him intently and asked, “Just, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying,” he replied slowly, “I sent in my two weeks’ notice.”

“You really are retiring?” I asked, dumbstruck.

“It’s just not about honor anymore,” he said, looking up at the rain. “I've made a lot of sorry decisions in my career. I just can’t keep a badge on my chest and put up with anymore bullshit. I’ll let the department find a replacement who can handle the job better than I could.”

“Badge,” I said, unable to think of anything else to say to him. He'd been the Chief for so long. The idea of him not being in charge seemed unfathomable.

“You take care of yourself, Private,” he said, turning to walk away. “Ya never know what’ll happen when a new chief is in charge.”

The rain stopped as I watched Shinebadge leave with the other officers. I just couldn’t believe it. I had heard County talk about it, but to see him want to put down the badge for good? It was more than I could ever comprehend.

I walked back to Twilight and Grapes whom were chatting As I stood nearby, Twilight noticed the sullen expression on my face. “Private? What’s wrong?” she asked, concerned.

“It’s nothing,” I replied, shaking my head and looking at Grapes. “So, what happens to the estate?”

"I would presume that my Uncle Cabochon gets it. He is her heir, despite his 'disappointing affliction'," Grapes answered with a roll of her eyes. "I swear that old nag lives in the past."

"Well, if all goes well, she'll be living in a prison cell for a while," Twilight said with a smile. "Private and I are going to head back home, are you coming?"

“I've got to get everything ready here actually. Uncle Cabochon should be arriving soon," Grapes said. "Maybe it's a good thing you're leaving, Private. Uncle Cabbie sometimes likes to flirt with good-looking stallions, who he knows are straight. He thinks it's funny."

"I'll be fine" I said, a little flattered.

Twilight giggled a little. "Then you'd know how it feels pretty boy," she said teasingly.

"Oh hush," I said, rolling my eyes. "You're just lucky you're too damn cute for me to get mad at."

Grapes laughed a little. "Aside from his odd sense of humor, he IS a good upstanding citizen. In the good upstanding citizen sense, rather than the 'I paid a bunch of ponies to like me' sense."

"Well, tell him we said hi, and that this stallion is taken,” Twilight said, grinning at me.

I gave a small smile and bumped her "Keep this up and I'll use my hooves in that spot I know will get you smiling."

Twilight blushed and said, "Alright, I'll shut up about it now."

"Well aren't you the handsome rascal," came a deep, cheerful voice from right behind me, "and that fedora. Such panache. Simply adds to the whole: 'I'm a well-known detective' vibe you have, going on there."

Grapes facehoofed as I slowly turned around. Standing there was a very dapper blonde unicorn with a tan coat, and a neat goatee. Very much like an older, more refined, version of Dusty. His suit vest was a light gray with a black pinstripe, and his blue eyes danced with mirth at any discomfort I may be feeling. "So. I hear you just had my Mother locked up. Couldn't have happened to a nicer mare."

"Uh thanks," I said, trying not to seem uncomfortable. "Detective Private Eye, you must be Cabochon."

"The one and only, dear boy," he said cheerfully. "Just here to see what's to be done with Mother's monument to bad taste, and see what I can do for my dear sister, and niece. Nice to meet the famous Private Eye, bringer of justice to ponies high and low."

"Yeah that's me," I said.

"Good for you, old boy. Some of my fellow nobles tend to get too big for their saddles," Cabochon said with a chuckle. "My mother, and a certain Prince being prime examples. Well, I'll leave you two alone. We've got a busy few days ahead of us, eh, Grapes?"

"No kidding," Grapes uttered, with an eye roll.

I let out a sigh of relief as the two began walking towards the monument of bad taste. I smiled at Twilight and said, "I guess I'm not as attractive to stallions as I am to mares."

Twilight smiled in turn and replied, "Well, you're perfectly handsome in my book." She brushed against me and nuzzled me. “That’s all that counts.”

"By the way, Miss Sparkle, you've netted yourself a fine specimen of stallionhood. Don't let him get stolen from beneath your hooves," Cabochon called back, causing Grapes to do a double-facehoof.

I blushed bright red as Twilight giggled. Somepony was getting a nasty tickling later.
_____________________________________________________

Perspective: Sour Grapes

I looked over the horrid statuary, contrasting with the well designed gardens, and sighed gustily. Change had come, and for the better, but that still meant a lot of work. Time taken away from my real work, too. Oh well, at least neither Dusty or I would have to deal with that obnoxious old biddy ever again.

"Well, Uncle, it's all yours now," I said.

"What if I don't WANT it?” he asked incredulously. "Even you can admit that Mother had horrible taste."

"It's still yours, Uncle Cabochon."

"Why don't YOU take it?"

"What in the hoary horseradished hay would I DO with it?"

"Sell the statuary, and the furniture, and turn it into a wineshop?"

"I don't know a THING about running a shop."

"It's just like running your wine sales, but with a more direct line to the customers."

"Why don't you sell it?"

"That would simply lead to some OTHER tribalist noble buying it," Uncle Cabochon observed. "I don't want that."

"Why don't you make it into an Earth Pony and Pegasi orphanage? That would drive Pave up the wall," I suggested gleefully.

"Not zoned for such, unfortunately."

"Fewmits."

"Do you think Champagne would want it?"

"Mom's happier in Seaside, with Dad," I replied.

"I think I WILL give it to you, after a lot of extensive remodeling," Cabochon said thoughtfully. "You'll have a nice place to stay when you're in Canterlot, with plenty of room for all your friends, too. Also, you'd be able to lend it to your friends, so they won't have to stay in the inns, here. Have you seen the prices they charge?"

"The Dew Drop Inn is reasonable," I told him.

"Yes, yes, and the restaurant has those delightful wheatgrass smoothies, but having your whole crew, here, during Hearths Warming would not be cheap, and I'd love to have you all visit during the holidays."

"All right, Uncle, you've twisted my foreleg," I said finally.

"Fantastic!" he cheered, happy to have won. Still, it was going to be a long road ahead. And without the looming shadow of Pave Diamond, it was sure to be much more bearable.
_______________________________________________________
Perspective: Private

We arrived back at the vineyard just as Luna's moon reached it's zenith. Twilight and I stood in front of the farmhouse as Grapes came out with a large basket filled with wine bottles.

"Grapes," Twilight said, eyeing it, "what's all this?"

"We're celebrating," Grapes said, with a grin. "I've brought out some of the finest wines from my personal collection. Even got a bottle of Summer Sunrise."

"Well," I said with a smile, "I did say I wanted to sample some of that!" I looked up as the other Storm Riders were starting the celebration off to the side. Queenie and Dusty were dancing with each other to the music, provided by Applejack.

We soon joined in and I found myself sitting at a picnic bench across from Applejack. I explained all that had happened and she smiled and said, "Ya went and did a good thing again, Private. Maybe Ah was a little harsh the other day."

I smiled and said, "I'll just be more careful with Luca's whereabouts from now on.”

“That don’t mean Ah’m just gonna let that mutt of yers deflower Winona anytime soon,” Applejack said, retaining her infamous stubborn nature.

I looked up as Grapes walked to me holding a glass of wine aloft in her magic. "Here you go, Private. Summer Sunrise, Princess Celestia's favorite wine," Grapes said.

"Thanks," I replied, taking the wine glass in my own magic. "Let me see how it compares to Potso's." I took a sip of the wine, savoring the flavor. A slow smile came to my face and I gushed, "Wow, It's no wonder the Princess loves this stuff!" The wine tasted absolutely great. I haven't had such delicious wine since Potso’s family reunion. I knew what I would be buying from now on.

"I've had to start growing watermelon for it, but I think it turned out very well," Grapes said with a smile. "I have some other vintages, too, like my Gala wines, and even a bottle of the most expensive wine in Equestria... It costs so much because the grapes are a bloody hassle to grow."

"That's why Ah stick tah apples thank ya" Applejack said with a smirk. "Bah the way, ya ever tried usin' crystal berries in your new wine? Ah had some back in the Crystal Empire. Ah think it'll give a nice twist to yer broccoli wine"

I wrinkled my nose in disgust and asked, "She made broccoli wine?"

"Eeyup" Applejack said with a smirk.

"She was the one who bet me that I couldn't do it. Only wine that absolutely has to have cheese to taste good. It's not something I make often... Actually I've only made two batches. One for the initial wager, and the other was after it became a fad. You see I sold the first batch to Princess Celestia, who gave it to Blueballs for a birthday present."

"Well so long as you don't make Pineapple wine, I'll keep coming for some."

Applejack looked at me curiously and asked, "What ya have against Pineapples?"

I frowned and replied, "They are plants with spikes on them. Clearly they don't want to be eaten, so why should we go against their wishes?"

Applejack laughed and asked, "And how many times did that work on yer parents when they wanted ya to eat them?"

"Twice," I admitted.

"Er... Already done, actually," Grapes said sheepishly. "On the up side it makes fantastic Pina Coladas."

Applejack laughed a little and then looked at the center of the party, and then at Grapes "Uh cuz, ya did keep track of all the bottles ya gave out right?"

"Not really. It's not like I'm going to ever run short on wine," Grapes replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Cuz Twilight got a hold of one," she replied pointing. I looked on as Twilight climbed up on a table, a wine glass in her hoof and the bottle it came from was already half empty.

"Oh great flaming fewmits," Grapes said with dread.

"You said it," I groaned, as I walked towards where Twilight was.

"I jush wan' to let you all know, that thish has been wonderful," Twilight was saying in a hilariously pompous tone. "And thish stuff ish fantashtic. I don' know how Grapsh does it..."

Oh no, Twilight was drunk. This, is not good. I facehoofed as some of the guests laughed at her slurred speech.

"She's always been a bit of a lightweight," Grapes observed.

"Oh, hey, there, hanshom!" Twilight gleefully said, spotting me. Her violet eyes a little wobbly. "Come to shay hello, or something more?" There were hoots in the small crowd.

"Get 'er, Twilight!" Firestormer yelled laughing.

"Go Twi!" Dusty added, to Queenie's amusement.

I blushed a little and walked to Twilight, levitating away the bottle. "I think you've had enough, Twilight," I said gently.
Twilight giggled, and wrapped her forelegs around my neck.

"We could go home, an'… do things." she whispered loudly enough for all the nearby ponies to hear.

I blushed even redder as the crowd cheered at Twilight's apparent boldness. I looked over at Grapes and begged, "Uh, a little help here…"

What do you want me to do?" Grapes asked, trotting over. "I usually just put her to bed, and let her sleep it off... This is the first time she's had a coltfriend."

"Just uh, get her off me first of all" I said, as Twilight began nuzzling me even more.

"Okay, Twi, come on," Grapes said, trying to levitate Twilight off me.

"Nuuuuuhhh uhhhh," Twilight uttered, clinging to me. "I don' wanna leave him!"

"She's surprisingly strong," Grapes observed, still trying to be gentle.

"Twi please," I said, looking at her as she clung to me. "You gotta get off me, you're hurting me" I said, gasping for air as Twilight's grip tightened around my neck.

"Oh! I'm shorry!" Twi uttered, freeing me, allowing Grapes to levitate her away.

"Okay. Time for you to go and sleep it off, Twilight," Grapes said resigned, as she moved herself and Twilight towards the farmhouse.

I smiled and turned around, suddenly I heard a crack in the air and Twilight materialized on my back. She wrapped her forelegs around my neck and nuzzled into my mane.

"How in tha?" Grapes uttered. "Twilight, you KNOW better than to teleport when drunk off your flank!"

"Twi.." I said as Applejack laughed.

"That's right, Twi! Ride em cowgirl!" she shouted. “Yee Haw!”

I looked back at Twilight who was starting to kiss the back of my neck in a way that made me feel very warm. Twilight, who knew she could be like this? I said to her "Twi, you really should head to bed..."

"I don' wanna. Wanna be with you," she whined, nibbling my ear.

"Oh boy..." Grapes muttered. "She's never been like this, before."

Applejack chuckled and said, "That's cuz she ain't had a sweetheart like Private in her life." She walked to Twilight and said, "Listen Sugarcube, Ah'm sure yer coltfriend just wants tah take ya home. So would ya let him already?"

"Ooooh," Twilight said with a grin. "I get it! Okay, we can go home."

"Right," Applejack said with a big grin, and then she smacked my flank. "Ride em home, silver!"

I glared at Applejack and said, "Excuse me?"

She just laughed and replied, "Sorry, couldn't resist."

I began the walk home with Twilight on my back. I'll admit it felt, nice that she was thinking about me this way. However, I knew she wasn't thinking straight. The wine just got to her. Much as I wanted her, I didn't want to take advantage of her in this state. I hope she'll understand...
______________________________________________________

Perspective: Sour Grapes

Well, I have to admit, drunken Twilight is hilarious. I sat there, watching them go, as I sipped my wine.

"Grapes?" Stormy asked, sitting beside me.

"Hey," I said, nuzzling his neck.

"Are you all right?" he asked, sounding concerned.

"I'm better, now. I don't have to worry about Pave, ever again, and I'm still a free pony," I said leaning against him.

"I meant..."

"I know. I'm going to be taking better care of myself. Just got a little too stressed with the bumper crop," I said, kissing his neck. "I've had this for a while, now, you know. This was the first flare-up."

"Yeah, but you mean a lot to me," Stormy said, causing me to smile.

"I know," I replied. "You mean a lot to me, too. When the season's over, what say we go on a vacation to Maneland? Just the two of us?"

Stormy blushed, ducking his head sheepishly, and replied, "I'd like that a lot, Grapes." So would I, to be honest. It'd be nice to have my Stormy all to myself.

"Well, looks like they're headed home," Stormy said. As he saw Private leaving with Twilight on his back.

"Well, good. Twilight's awfully feisty when she's drunk," I observed. "Hope Private can handle her." Stormy chortled.

"Glad today's over," Stormy said, nuzzling me. "It's been wild, here, for the past few."

"I hear you," I commented. "Glad to get things back to normal, or what passes for normal in Ponyville."

"I like normal," Stormy said with a grin, and kissed me. "Especially since you're here."

I sighed happily, leaning against him. My first friend became my coltfriend... and lead to me having more friends than I ever expected. Sitting there, snuggled with Stormy, not a bad way to end a crazy couple of days.

I just hoped Private could handle Twilight when she's drunk. I'd never seen her quite so amorous before, to be honest. Eh, he's a big strong stallion. Surely he could handle it.
______________________________________________________

Perspective: Private

I'm really starting to wonder if I could handle it. When we arrived at the library I came inside to find it deserted. Spike was sleeping over at Rarity's. She needed his help filling a large order with Gala season rearing it's ugly head.

I walked up to Twilight's room as Twilight began kissing the back of my neck again. "Twi, I'm gonna put you to bed now."

“Could join me, if you like," Twilight said in as sultry a tone she could muster.

Normally I would record this and use it as blackmail material for later. However, it had been a long day and night and Twilight needed to be put to bed. I walked to her bed, lifted the covers and set her gently with my magic onto it.

"Don't wanna join?" Twilight asked, as she leaned her head on one hoof.

"No Twilight, I don't think that's such a good idea," I replied, as I turned to begin walking away. Suddenly I felt a tug at my tail and looked back to see Twilight was doing it with her magic. Her eyes looked like they were pleading with me.

"Don' have to,” she paused, “do anything. Just stay with me, please."

I couldn't leave her like this. She just wanted me with her. This was weird, I had no idea Twilight could be like this. Then again, she did get into the wine a little too much. I sighed, relenting, and laid down on the bed. "Twi, I'll stay tonight. Tailspin's probably asleep by now anyway."

Twilight smiled, wrapping me up in a hug.

I laid there with Twilight for a while. She was nuzzling me warmly and showed no signs of wanting to go to sleep. I smiled and gently nuzzled her back. But then Twilight reached a hoof and put it on my chest fur.

Wait, when did my trench coat open?

"Brave, handsome Private," Twilight murmured. "I should be as brave as you."

: "T-Twi," I stammered "What are you- oh Luna..."

"Could you show me?" she asked.

"Show you what?" I asked, sweating now as part of me knew what she wanted.

"How to be brave," she whispered, leaning close, and kissing my neck again.

I blushed again and gently pushed on her chest. "Twi, this isn't a good idea," I said, with regret.

"Why not?" she pleaded, her violet eyes gazing at me.

"You aren't thinking straight," I said firmly. "I don't want to do anything rash that we'll both regret later."

"Oh, of course, who would want the bookworm," Twilight said rolling over. "No one, that's who..."

"Twi," I said, looking at her in confusion. "Did I say something wrong? I..."

"You don't want me, and who can blame you," she said sadly.

I just stared at her, just took in what she was saying. I reached over a hoof and wrapped it around her. Then... I started tickling her belly.

Twilight’s face tried not to smile. But slowly her giggles became louder as she cried “Private! Hehehe! Stop, no, hehe!! Private, you, hehehehehe!!”

“I love you, Twilight,” I said with a smile, as my tickling relented. “I do want you, but I wanna do it when we both have clear heads. I want our first time together to be special.” I nuzzled her gently and asked, "Can you wait until then?”

She smiled a little hazily and kissed me on the cheek, licking it a little. “Don’t keep me waiting too long…Preventus…” she said then yawned widely. “Sleepy…”

I placed my horn on hers and used an anesthetic spell to put her the rest of the way to sleep. Her head fell on a pillow and she mumbled in her sleep. I levitated a bucket over for the morning results and set it next to the bed. I then got up and pulled the covers over her. I laid a kiss on her head and said, “Good night, Twi.”

“Preventus,” she mumbled with a smile, “I love you so much…”

“I love you too,” I said, as I walked out. “Never forget that.”

I closed the door behind me and sighed. Glad that was over with, I reached into my trench coat and pulled out Pave’s magic enhancer syringe. I'd convinced Frisk and Dunnit to let me borrow it for the night. I wanted to know who was the friend who provided her with it.

As I read the label and my eyes grew wide, this stuff was made ten years ago, and distributed three years ago,

By none other than Glimmer….

Chapter 3 "Red Hearts, Red Wine"

Chapter 3

“Red Wine, Red Hearts”

“Right, thank you,” Twilight said as she hung up the phone for the hundredth time today. She sighed and informed me, “I’ve checked all of Storm’s and Grapes’ usual dating spots, according to just about everypony I called, they weren’t there.”

“I think I’ve found some luck on the bottles,” I said, setting down the sale’s records. “Turns out that Maribell and Tree Binder both bought the wine before hoof.”

“Any luck on contacting their families about this whole blackmail business?” Twilight said, writing down some of the information.

“I called Tree Binder’s family,” I said. “Got an answer from a rather careless mother. Turns out he was living in her basement ever since he left high school. She got him the job to get him out.” I shook my head.

“Remind me to keep Spike from setting anything up in the basement then,” Twilight said. “What about Maribell?”

“Her parents are some rich earth ponies from Bronoto,” I explained. “They cried and yelled for hours about their ‘little pretty princess’ getting killed. After they finally calmed down they explained that Maribell was hired on for public relations reasons.”

“So that they could show their family is actually contributing to society?” Twilight asked. “I’d like to see Blueblood get down in the dirt for PR reasons.”

It’s amazing what nobles will do to preserve their reputation. I went on, “I called Parsley's family last, now that was very interesting. According to his sister, his only surviving relative, he’d been keeping in touch with both Tree Binder, and Maribell. She didn’t overhear anything about Grapes’ apparent blackmail, though.”

“Neither did the other two families?” Twilight asked, looking at me.

“Nope,” I said, shaking my head. “Apparently they all agreed that they came home angry about being reprimanded. Maribell even threatened to sue Grapes for misconduct or some other bullshit, but the case never got off the ground.”

“So where does that leave us?” Twilight asked. “We know that Maribell and Tree Binder bought the wine bottles. You think it was for celebration?”

“They were obviously doing something devious,” I said, looking at the chemical bottle. “The question is, what was Parsley doing with this? Might explain why he was airborne?”

“Private, maybe somepony killed them to cover up the sabotage,” Twilight suggested. “They could’ve used the two wine bottles to knock out the victims and then Parsley could’ve left in the struggle. Then he got killed by the murderer pulling him down onto the weather vane.”

“That would make sense,” I said, “but these syringes still bug me. Forceps said this was most likely how they died, but what was heart medicine doing in the trash by the bunkhouse?”

“Our killer probably used it to kill the first two victims,” Twilight deduced. “Maybe if we can figure out what kind of heart condition they're used for, then maybe we can narrow our list down to just everypony who’s a unicorn, hates Grapes, and has a bad heart.”

“That makes it what, about, several hundred, any luck on getting Pave Diamond on the phone?” I asked.

“No, that secretary wouldn’t even let me say my name unless it had some title attached to it. I had to call myself, the illustrious student of Princess Celestia,” Twilight replied, imitating an upper crust accent.

I chuckled a little at Twilight’s impression and then asked, “So, did she let you talk to her?”

“Nope, she said that ‘Miss Diamond is too busy to deal with some royal brat.’ Who in the hay does she think she is?” Twilight huffed. “I don’t know how Celestia puts up with this nonsense.”

Riing!

I picked up the phone on my desk and answered it, “Private Eye Detective Agency…”

“Aren’t ya gonna say it, sonny?” I heard Forceps’ voice on the other end.

“No.”

“Come on! Say it!”

I sighed and said, “Solving crimes in the blink of an eye…”

I heard cheering in the background along with some groans. Apparently I earned somepony money. At least this was better than Forceps calling me in the middle of his “examinations” with Granny Smith. I still shudder at that memory.

“Anyway,” Forceps went on, “we examined the bodies and turns out the cause of death was in fact, an overdose of Calcium Channel Blockers.”

“Somepony can die of heart medication overdose?” I asked.

“Anything that can heal can kill in the right doses, sonny. One guy I know died from downing a whole bunch of cough syrup.”

“So the cause of death was with Tree Binder and Maribell, what about Parsley?”

“Again, this guy is interesting. Turns out, he died two hours after the other two.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” I said shaking my head. “Unless somepony else killed them. Did forensics find anything?”

“Nada,” Forceps answered. “However we did find out that the wine bottles were opened before they were used as blunt instruments. Turns out that somepony was trying to put a bunch of nasty gunk into them. Destroying the taste and making the wine become basically grape flavored water.”

So this was definitely a sabotage run. Twilight’s theory may not be too far off. The question is though, why was Parsley killed two hours later? Would the killer really stick around for two hours expecting Parsley to show up? It doesn’t make sense for the killer to stick around that long.

“Alright,” I said, “Keep uniforms combing the area, I’m going to look into who could’ve gotten a hold of the syringes.”

I hung up and explained everything to Twilight. Twilight put a hoof on her chin and said, “I’d hate to go behind Grapes’ back like this, but if we don’t iron out her alibi then the courts will have a field day with her.”

“Where should we start?” I asked, crossing my forelegs in thought. “She couldn’t have just disappeared last night.”

“If the murderer used the syringes, then we should probably look into that. I do have a friend who works at the hospital who may be able to help us,” Twilight said, putting a hoof on her chin.

__________________________________________________________

Ponyville’s hospital was rather small compared to some of the others I’ve been too. It was only one building with a rather small staff. I guess that was all a small town really needed.

We entered the waiting room to find it was largely deserted. Twilight tapped the bell at the front desk and the caramel colored unicorn that treated me entered. He gave us a smile and said, “Ah, Twilight and Private, it’s good to see you both. I hope you’re keeping up with your medications, Private.”

Back during the whole Cardinal case I got caught in a fire and almost died by inhaling smoke. Twilight saved me and I had to spend weeks in the hospital in recovery. Once I was out the doc had me take some pills to help me breathe better. Luckily, I hadn't gotten caught in any fires since then.

I gave him a nod and replied, “I’m fine, Doc, no jumping into burning buildings since we last met.”

He gave a slight nod and wrote something down on his clipboard. “I’ll still need you to come in for your check up pretty soon. Just to make sure there is no long term damage.”

I sighed at the prospect of coming back here. Twilight just smiled slightly and asked, “Is Redheart in? I’d like to speak to her about something.”

“She’s just finishing up with another patient,” he answered, “I’ll go get her.”

We sat in the waiting room and I felt the need to ask “Why Redheart? Couldn’t we have just asked the doctor himself?”

“I just think Redheart will be easier to convince to help,” Twilight said, reading an issue of Ponies magazine. “She always had a strong sense of responsibility. If she helped a murderer then I’m thinking she would be willing to help us.”

I started sifting through my own issue of Ponies magazine. I raised an eyebrow at one article.

Adamus Eye, C.E.O. of Eye Enterprises has recently come under fire as his health has been brought into question. Numerous workers have noticed that Adamus has been distant, acting agitated and short tempered to his fellow business ponies.

Adamus himself refused to comment on the exact nature of his health. However, he did tell us that the rumors were quote “unfounded” and “ridiculous.”

Numerous sources in the business world have stated that investments in Eye Enterprises have gone down significantly over the past ten years. One anonymous source has stated that this may be the cause of the health concerns. Adamus’ doctors declined from giving a comment themselves.

Adamus is the father of three sons Irenius, Lazarus and Slantus Eye. Our reporters were unable to locate Slantus for a comment. Lazarus, having recently been jailed for business fraud had this to say: “My father is the most capable stallion I know, if his health was truly a concern, I would know about it.”

Irenius, famous for being the father of detective Private Eye, was unable to comment on the concerns. He has stated recently however, that if Adamus was truly in danger. He would do everything in his power to aid in whatever is troubling him.

Adamus’ wife Idrena is currently traveling the world. She too wouldn’t comment on the status of his health. Her current whereabouts are unknown at the time of this article’s publishing.

Details on what Adamus could be suffering from are-

I stopped reading it after a bit. I moved on to look at an ad for some new movie coming out.

Was Adamus really having health problems? This could hurt his business if articles like this become common.

For all my hatred for Adamus he was still my grandfather. I still felt a twinge of worry that he may be in trouble. I guess I don’t hold as much hatred as I used to.

The door opened and a white earth pony walked in. She was rather plain looking with a pink mane tied in a bun and out of the way. A cutie mark of a red cross was on her flank as well as the Nurse’s cap she had on her head. She walked to us with a small smile on her face and said, “Twilight, it’s good to see again.”

“Good to see you too, Redheart,” she said as we both walked to her.

For some reason I couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at Red Heart. Her blue eyes looked at me and she raised her own pink eyebrow and asked, “And you are?”

I shook my head and snapped out of it. “Sorry, I’m Detective Private Eye, we’re investigating a few murders that happened over at Grapevine Hills.”

“Murders?” Red Heart gasped, shaking her head. “Unbelievable how this keeps happening. Here I thought Ponyville would be a peaceful town to spend my career in.”

“We were hoping you could tell us who would need these,” Twilight said as she held out the syringes in her magic.

Red Heart gave us both a look and replied, “You know this breaches Doctor-patient confidentiality.”

“Red Heart,” Twilight said, her look earnest, “this could help us find the murderer. I know it’s a sacred trust you hold with you patients. However, if one of them is a murderer then we need to know.”

Red Heart closed her eyes, I could tell she was pondering it for a minute. After about two minutes she sighed and said, “Alright, I’ll look at the records and see what I can find. I don’t want anypony to think that I had a hoof in murdering somepony.”

“Thanks, Red Heart,” Twilight said with a smile. “This could really help us.”

Red Heart took the syringes and then her eyebrows raised. “Where did you get these?” she asked.

“They were the murder weapons,” I explained. “The killer murdered the victims by overdosing them with the drugs.”

“This is medicine used to combat Rooster Crow syndrome,” she said, looking at the labels. “It’s a disease that effects the heart, happens when somepony overworks and the heart can’t handle it. It happens a lot with earth pony and unicorn hybrids.”

“Why’s that?” Twilight asked.

“It’s genetic,” Red Heart explained. “A unicorn’s body is meant for channeling magic as well as blood. As a result it needs a clearer path and that’s why unicorns aren’t as physically strong as earth ponies. They don’t have as many muscles obstructing the path. There are exceptions obviously, but most of the time the adrenaline of working as an earth pony causes the unicorn heart to not be able to handle the work load.”

“So these help get the blood flowing?” I asked, looking at the syringe.

“Exactly,” Red Heart said. “It’s rare but this disease usually occurs in farming unicorns. Their parents are usually earth ponies.”

“Wait a minute,” Twilight said. “Of course! Red Heart, did Sour Grapes come in here yesterday?”

Red Heart tapped her chin in thought and then said “Brown unicorn, violet eyes and glasses?”

“That’s her,” Twilight said with a nod.

Red Heart nodded and replied, “Yes she did come in here with her coltfriend. She was suffering from an irregular heartbeat that woke her up in the middle of the night. That’s one of the side effects of the drug. She was very stubborn and refused to seek treatment until her coltfriend made her. She came in here kicking and screaming.” She gestured to a spot on the wall and continued, “That is the result of one of her magic bolts going off during the struggle to get her stable.”

Grapes was here! That explains why she was so guarded. She didn’t want anypony to find out she was having health problems. I looked to Red Heart and said, “Thanks for the help; we’ll take it from here.”

“I leave her to you two then,” she said with a small smile, and then she gave me a look. “You remind me of somepony, I can’t quite put it where though.”

She seemed familiar as well. Just who does she remind me of? That doesn’t matter though, right now, we had to find Grapes.

_______________________________________________________

We walked the path back to the vineyard just as Celestia’s sun was heading towards the horizon. I noticed that Twilight was quiet, I could tell she was still thinking about Grapes’ involvement in all this.

As we reached the top of a hill path away from the main town I decided I couldn’t stand moping Twilight anymore. I fell into pace beside her and said, “Twi, we should stop for a minute.”

She gave me a look and then stopped. Sighing, she said, “I’m sorry, Private. I just haven’t had a personal friend get caught up in something like this. Not since Shining was accused.”

I have nothing but sour memories of that case. I knew dwelling on that wasn’t going to help her. So, I reached up a hoof and gently started stroking the back of her ear. Twilight’s eyes immediately became half lidded and she leaned into my stroking. If there was one way to calm Twilight down it was this. She let out a sigh as my gentle hoof stroked her favorite spot.

“Ooh Private,” she said with a smile as her eyes closed. “Just when I think it’s all hopeless, you pull something like this to calm me down.”

“Hey,” I said, laying a kiss on her nose, “I gotta have learned something in all my time with you.”

“I do feel a little better,” she said, a small smile coming to her face.

“Well, I do know how to make you smile more,” I said with an evil smirk.

I discovered about two dates ago that Twilight had a very particular spot that was always ticklish. I found it out when she accidentally tripped while going down a hill one night. As I was helping her up my hoof touched her belly and…

“Private don’t you dare!” She glared as suddenly I gripped her hooves with my magic and she landed on her back on a nearby bench. Before she could get up I ran my hoof along the soft fur of her belly. She started giggling and laughing as I tickled her. “Private! Hehehe! No fair! Hehe Stop!!”

I smiled down at her as her smile widened and tears came up from my relentless tickling. Finally I let up and she breathed a little as she smiled at me. I laid a kiss on her soft belly, a soft giggling escaping Twilight. I looked at her and my expression softened. “Twi, you’re constantly helping me feel better when a case gets personal. I figured, I should return the favor,” I said.

Twilight got up off the bench and laid a kiss on my cheek. “Thanks Private, I needed to laugh a little,” she replied.

I smiled and watched as Twilight’s tail caressed my side as she walked on. I followed her. Twi, I don’t think I’d ever get tired of moments like this. I could spend a lifetime with this mare…

______________________________________________________________

Twilight and I had just walked into the Vineyard proper. There we saw Sour Grapes trotting about, checking the baskets, so they wouldn't be too heavy to carry, making sure that everypony had plenty of water, or took a break when they needed.

"Good work, everypony," she said, as she helped Earshot carry the basket to the scales. "I'm sorry for the extra work, but for some reason, these vines felt extra productive, this season."

As she ordered her crew I couldn’t help but notice how tired the chocolate colored unicorn was. Sweat was pouring down her head and clinging to her coat. She was breathing a little shallower. Red Heart’s idea of the heart condition looked spot on.

I noticed Sirocco pass by as she was doing some calculations. I walked to her and gestured to Grapes. “Has she been working all day?” I asked.

Sirocco looked at Grapes with a small smile on her face. She replied, "Grapes works every day. Some ponies do not like her supervising, but she does it because she cares. She makes sure we have plenty of water, and take breaks so we will not overwork. We make sure she does the same."

"However, it is still a lot of work, this season," the tall mare said thoughtfully. "We have all been working a lot of hours, because of this particularly fruitful crop."

Twilight gave a frown to Grapes and we both walked to her. Twilight spoke up first "Grapes, do you have two minutes?"

"Yeah. Let me get some lemonade, first, okay?" Grapes said before she turned to the rest of the crew. "Great job, everypony. Let's wrap up for the night." There were tired-sounding murmurs of agreement, and they started bringing up their baskets. Grapes went inside, and came out with tray with a pitcher of lemonade and three glasses. She poured three glasses of the cool yellow liquid, and quickly drank half of her own glass. She sighed, wiping her brow with a foreleg. "All right... What's up, you two? Any news?" she asked tiredly.

Twilight closed her eyes and then said, "Grapes, we know where you went last night."

"You do, do you?" Grapes asked, raising an eyebrow. I could tell we were treading on dangerous ground.

“Red Heart said you came last night with Storm," I said for Twilight. "We can easily look up any medical records to prove it, unless you wanna come clean."

Grapes’ face slowly turned to one of pure rage. "Really? Come clean about what? Why do you need to go into my private business, anyway? Oh, right, I'm a murder suspect," Grapes said with sharper than usual sarcasm. "Even though you could probably go to any number of ponies that have worked for me in the past, and have then tell you that I wouldn't do such a thing. Tartarus, even that Fritter colt went on to become a well-known food critic, and credits me with his success."

Sour," Twilight said, trying to sound firm "We know all about it! We know you went to the hospital last night because you had a heart condition!"

"You know? What'd you do? Go to every place in Ponyville, and ask them if I'd been there?" Grapes asked, sounding irate.

"Red Heart told us she treated you last night!" Twilight shouted loudly, finally fed up. "Do you want me to get Storm here to ask him if that's the truth?"

That seemed to do it. Grapes took a small sip of her lemonade and met Twilight’s eyes. My marefriend’s expression softened at the look.

"All right, all right," Grapes uttered sounding frustrated. "Yes, I went to the hospital, last night. I had a reaction to my medication, and it scared both Stormy and myself..."

Twilight's face softened and she said, "How long have you been fighting it?"

"It's been going on for a while," Grapes said. "I've had it under control. Just had a bit of a build-up."

Twilight's face showed a bit of guilt and she said, "I'm sorry; I just wanted to clear your alibi. This was the best way I could think of to do it." I reached over and put a hoof on her back, gently rubbing it to keep her from getting overwhelmed. Twilight was calmed down and took a bit of the lemonade.

Grapes sighed. "I hate to let anypony know... It seems that they just use it as an excuse to tell me what I can and can't do," she said, rubbing a hoof against her forehead.

I gave her a smile and said "There's no shame in admitting you can't do something to your friends. I'm sure if anypony here found out they would never think less of you."

"She's never been one to be overdon', lad," Squall said.

We all looked up and saw that Sirocco, Firestormer, Ice Storm, Squall and Storm were all there. From their expressions, I guess they heard the whole thing. However, they didn’t seem to think any less of her.

True, we'll worry," Queenie said with a smile. "but you're our friend. We would not have thought less of you, and your burden would have been shared."

"Yea even though you had Stormy, you've got us, too," Firestormer said. "You've helped us all, a lot. We should have the chance to return the favor."

"I find myself in agreement. You are as much a part of the Storm Riders as we are your employees," Sirocco asserted.

Grapes blushed, and said sheepishly, "Sorry, guys. I should have trusted you all. Then again, you don't like being coddled, either."

Finally Stormfront walked from the crowd and to her. The massive pegasus gave a warm smile. "I'm always here for you, Grapes," he said, nuzzling her. "but t you already knew that."

Just as I was getting caught up in the moment I heard a yell come from the direction of the Everfree forest. Everypony's eyes went wide.

Grapes leapt to her hooves, and everypony there turned. "That was Earshot!" she yelped.

I nodded springing into action "You guys get the police, Twilight and I will head towards Everfree and see what's happening!" With that Twilight and I broke into a gallop as Grapes began ordering her crew.

"Firestormer, get the police,” she ordered. “Stormy, scout the area, where in Tartarus is Dusty?"

"Destemming shed," Queenie supplied.

"Okay, grab him, and bring him along. We're not letting them barrel head-first into this, especially in the Everfree," Grapes added.

"Should not somepony stay here?" Sirocco asked.

"All right,” Grapes relented, “I'll go on ahead. Stormy's gone to scout around, and I'll join Twilight and Private. Keep an eye on things here, and send the Police, once they arrive," Grapes said, galloping off.

Grapes caught up with us as we ran towards Everfree. I gave her a look and said, "You should let us handle this, Grapes"

Twilight gave a smirk and said, "Don't try and deter her, that's like telling Applejack to wear a frilly dress."

"Earshot is in danger," Grapes inserted firmly, galloping along. "No way you're going to keep me from helping."

I nodded and led the way. The three of us galloped towards the screaming and crossed into Everfree. I could see Stormfront flying overhead. With any luck, this should help us get the drop on them. I only hope that Earshot is okay…

_________________________________________________________

The sun had just set by the time the screaming stopped. Everfree forest was as cold and eerie as ever. Twilight stood close to me as we trekked through it. I always felt unnerved whenever we came here. This place just... wasn't natural...

Stormfront came in for a landing. "I found him. Earshot's being held by this masked pony in a clearing, up ahead," he said.

I nodded and quietly crept into the bushes. I heard shouting and saw a pony clad entirely in black clothing with a ski mask covering his face. I noticed Earshot was knocked out, his legs and wings tied up. The masked pony was a unicorn judging by the horn, and he was talking to another pony in the bushes. It was so dark I couldn't make who it was out...

The masked pony growled, "You said it would be an easy job! Now I'm stuck with this squealing brat."

“It was supposed to be an easy job, you complete and utter twit. I should have hired somepony competent to handle this. Instead I get you," other one uttered, in a high-class Canterlotian accent. "Why did you have me come here, anyway? If the true rulers of Equestria were in charge, this horrid forest would have been razed."

I looked over at Storm and gestured for him to get up in the trees as the conversation went on.

Stormfront nodded, and he flapped those huge wings silently and ascended.

"How was I supposed to know that they would turn their backs on the deal?" the masked pony snarled

"A twit hires more twits. I told you not to use anypony but unicorns, you idiot," the voice uttered, dripping in contempt.
"They would not feel solidarity with their fellow lesser beings."

"Whoever's doing the talking sounds awfully familiar," Grapes whispered.

The masked pony went on, “All I asked for is that you help restore my family's reputation! You realize what could happen to it if somepony connects me to you?”

"Blame your slut of a Mother, but you've done no wrong, until now," the other voice said contemptuously.

“You think yourself so grand?" he spat. "Your line is hardly so pure itself..."

I decided that I had enough, I shouted, "STORM, NOW!!!"

The massive pegasus dropped on the masked pony like a dead weight. The two struggled as the masked one kicked at Stormfront. His size kept him down, however. I then saw the other unicorn running off into the forest. I yelled at Twilight,
"Take care of Earshot! Grapes, you're with me!" We took off after the mysterious pony.

"Right behind you, Private," Grapes cried, galloping after the fleeing figure.

Luna's moon managed to provide just enough light for us to see our way forward. However, it wasn’t enough that I could see the figure. I followed the figure's outlined form and could just make out that it was a unicorn.

"Argh... You should have Twilight come with you," Grapes panted, as we ran after the fleeing figure. "She could teleport and end this chase."

"I wasn't thinking that far ahead to be honest," I panted back as we continued our pursuit.

Suddenly the figure turned around and her its horn glowed a bright white. The horn fired a magical bolt that hit me square in the chest, Grapes was so distracted by my crumpling to the ground that she soon got hit as well. I looked up as I landed on the ground with a thud. Just as the unicorn's horn flashed again I caught a glimpse of smug looking feminine blue eyes.

"Ow... ow ow ow owow..." Grapes panted, then took a deep breath, and let it out. "Gotta calm down, don't want..."

I slowly got up and walked over to Grapes. "You alright?" I asked, gently touching a hoof to the spot I got hit in. It didn't cause any physical damage but it sure stung like hell.

"Got hit by a magical bolt," Grapes said, starting to sound better. "Sort of got my heart to skipping beats."

I helped her to her hooves and I spoke gently, "You take it easy and head back to Storm and Twilight. I'm going to take a look around to see if she dropped anything."

"All right, got to see if Earshot's okay too," she said, as she headed back toward the clearing.

I looked around the path and saw something glinting off a nearby tree branch. I gave it a quizzical look. It was an elaborate diamond brooch with what looked like a family crest on it. It had your typical heraldic shield, with diamonds in all four quadrants, and a ribbon or scroll at the bottom with a motto in what looked like old Equestrian.

"Looks like our suspect is nobility of some sort. Better ask Twilight about it when we get back to the office," I muttered to myself, pocketing the brooch and walking back to the clearing. There I found Storm and Grapes untying Earshot.

Twilight looked up from the bushes and her head was a little bowed. "He got away, he dropped a flash bomb and I couldn't see, he must've teleported away," she said dejectedly.

I put a hoof on her shoulder and said, "It's alright Twilight, we still got our lead."

Earshot was slowly regaining consciousness. Grapes looked at him with a worried expression. "Are you okay, Earshot?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine, now," the Night-Pony replied.

“We're glad to hear that," I said, walking to the colt with Twilight "Good thinking using that voice of yours to let ponies know what was going on."

"Well, I wanted get help, and that was the quickest way to do it," Earshot said with a smile on his face.

I then watched as Storm and Grapes simply hugged the colt. Any other pony would think they were a family themselves. I gained a newfound respect for Grapes right then.

Grapes gave the Night Pony another smile and said, “Let’s go home.”

I watched the three of them leave. Earshot was riding on Stormfront’s back laughing a little at being with his family. I felt deeply compelled to protect this, this picture of unadulterated love and care.

Whoever thought they would destroy it with their selfish greed,

Was going to answer to me….