The Pony Variety Show! Offseason
1. An Unexpected Vacation
Chapter 1
An Unexpected Vacation
Applause erupted from inside the larger-than-life theatre as the curtain closed. While the audience slowly made their way to the exit, three ponies sat in a small booth above the balconies talking about the recent events of the episode.
“We did it!” exclaimed Vinyl Scratch. “We finally got payback on those changelings!”
“Yeah, and I’m glad we did it now,” Hyper Flyer said. “I was afraid that I was going to be their next victim.”
“Well, I’m excited for Twilight, but did it really have to involve...” Bobby shivered at the thought. “I mean, I’ve seen some pretty gross stuff from them, but that was just flat out disgusting.”
“Well, they’re changelings,” replied Vinyl. “There’s not much we can do about them. Anyway, let’s get backstage. They’ll be starting the meeting soon.”
In a flash of bright light, Vinyl teleported out of her seat, leaving the intercom headset behind. Bobby and Hyper Flyer walked out of the booth and made their way down the spiral staircase.
Hyper Flyer was an orange pegasus with a crazy purple mane. He had started out as part of the advertising team, designing different ads to go on billboards and the sides of busses all over New York City. When the holo-projectors were installed during the theatre upgrade, he was selected to operate them. Ever since that day, he’s become a master with them. Just give him 5 minutes, and he can transform the stage into Times Square, bustling with people.
Bobby was a tan unicorn with a neatly combed brown mane. He originally worked for a traveling theatre group as a lighting operator. Since the group constantly toured Equestria, he didn’t have a house to call his own. His home was on the road. After a performance in Canterlot, he got asked to work for a new stage show by a pegasus named Captain Literal. He accepted when the Captain said they would pay him double of what he was getting paid now. Now, Bobby lives in the attic of the Equestrian Theatre. But with the work that he’s done up there, nopony even calls it an attic anymore. “It’s more of an apartment after what I’ve done to it,” he would say to anyone who asked about the attic.
The two stallions made their way behind the curtain and found a place to sit among the other cast and crew members. As they talked with the other ponies, Twilight Sparkle stepped up onto a platform.
“Can I have everypony’s attention, please?” Twilight said over the murmuring crowd. “Hello? Can anypony hear me? I’d like your attention please!”
Rainbow Dash walked up beside her. “Twilight, please. Let me show you how it’s done.” She took a deep breath and yelled at the top of her lungs. “EVERYPONY QUIET!”
The stage suddenly became silent.
“Thank you, Rainbow.” Twilight said as Rainbow Dash returned to her spot. “First off, great show today, everypony. I’m sure our audience loved it. Now, before we begin with our usual production notes, I have a special announcement to make. The head writers and production staff have made an official decision to stop production of the PVS for a few months.”
The cast and crew reacted to this with mixed responses.
“Yes! Now I can take that cruise around Haywaii!”
“Wait. If they stop production, then I’ll have to move back in with mother.”
“Well that’s great to hear. I can spend time with the family again.”
“Where are the muffins?”
“Las Pegasus, here I come!”
“Okay, quiet down everypony,” Twilight shouted. “That’s better. Now, Ardan has promised that this break will be a short one, and won’t last for that long. It’s just that Ardan and his staff had gotten so tired that they felt that we all needed a break.”
A brown earth pony stood up. “How will we let the fans know about this break?”
“We don’t,” Twilight replied. “You see, if we tell everyone that we’re taking a break, we run the risk of losing some fans. It happens every time during the offseason for MLP. So we’re just going to play it safe and not tell anyone. Now some might figure out that we’re taking a break, but most will think that episode 10 is taking so long because there will be something big. So, they’ll stay and wait for us to produce it.”
“Well, what do we say if someone asks about why we’re not doing shows?” the earth pony asked.
“Then we’ll tell them,” Twilight responded. “But we shouldn’t have to worry about that. As you all know, when an episode is produced, a transcript is put on deviantART and FIMFiction. The fans can read those transcripts in case if they weren't able to get a ticket for an episode or if they want to read them again to have another laugh at something that they’ve already seen. The fans put comments on the sites, and since Ardan has all of the scripts on his accounts, the comments are sent to him. Thus, Ardan has full contact with the fans, and he will answer any of their questions, including questions about the break. Does that make sense?”
“Umm... yes,” the pony replied after a long pause. “You kinda lost me there, but it makes sense.”
“Okay,” Twilight said. “If there are no more questions, let’s start on the production notes. First item, who the hay said I signed some kind of agreement to let the singers have a week long break?”
* * *
As Bobby got off the elevator, he found a book with a note attached to it in front of the attic door. As he walked into his room, he levitated the book and read the note.
Dear Bobby,
Since you’re the only one who will be at the theatre during the break, I’ve decided to give you this book. It’s called “How to Survive the Offseason of a Popular Stage Show; Tips to keeping the fans under control and out of the theatre.” It’s got some useful advice on how to handle multiple situations that may arise including a fan breaking in, news stations trying to get interviews, and just how to avoid complete boredom. I hope that nothing goes wrong during the offseason, and I will see you when we start rehearsals.
Sincerely,
Twilight Sparkle
P.S. If there’s an emergency, there will be a couple of Royal Guard members on standby to assist you. Good luck!
“Oh Twilight,” he said to himself as he put the book on the coffee table. “I’ll be fine. Besides, it’s just a simple offseason. What could possibly go wrong?”
As if on cue, ominous music came out of his radio alarm clock.
Author's Note
The events of this story take place after episode 9 of the Pony Variety Show. Click the link to read it.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/28681/9/the-pony-variety-show/episode-9
2. The Cutie Mark Crusaders go Crusading (Part 1)
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The Pony Variety Show! Offseason
2. The Cutie Mark Crusaders go Crusading (Part 1)
Chapter 2
The Cutie Mark Crusaders go Crusading
Part 1
It had been 3 days since the cast and crew of the PVS took a break, and Bobby was already bored.
“Come on, think,” he said to himself. “There's gotta be something I can do to pass the time.”
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. As Bobby opened the door, he was rather surprised to see Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo standing in front of him.
“Hi girls,” Bobby said. “What are you all doing here?”
“We're here to see if we can get our cutie marks in the theatre business,” Sweetie Belle replied.
“And we were thinking that maybe you could show us how to do all of that technical stuff,” Applebloom continued.
“Yeah!” Scootaloo said. “Maybe our special talent is sound mixing or lighting!”
Bobby remembered back to the last time he saw the 3 try to get their cutie marks. He was focusing lights for episode 4.
* * *
“How long do I have to stand here?” Rainbow Dash asked. “This is way too boring for me.”
“Just a few more minutes,” Bobby replied as he climbed the ladder above the stage. “It's kinda hard to get up to these lights without wings.”
When he made it to the top of the catwalk, Bobby looked down and saw the Cutie Mark Crusaders pull out a large cart with about 15 cans of paint.
“Alright, girls,” Applebloom said. “Are y’all ready to get started?”
“Yep!” Sweetie Belle responded as she laid out a large sheet of paper. “I can't wait! Scootaloo, would you like to do the honors?”
“Of course!” Scootaloo said. She cleared her throat and yelled the seven words that would eventually spell disaster. “CUTIE MARK CRUSADER 30 MINUTE ART CHALLENGE!”
The three fillies dived into the paint cart and got to work. Applebloom grabbed a paint roller with her teeth, dipped it into a red paint bucket, and dragged it along the paper. Sweetie Belle used her tail as a makeshift paint brush, sweeping it for side to side. Scootaloo held a small brush in her mouth, but decided not to use that. Instead, she jumped into 4 paint buckets, one hoof in each bucket, and ran across the paper. Bobby tried to ignore the chaotic events below, and got back to work.
About 30 minutes later, Bobby came out of the break room to find most of the stage covered in paint.
“3... 2... 1... Stop!” Applebloom yelled. “Brushes down! Let’s see what we made.”
“Ummm... Where’s the paper?” Scootaloo asked.
They began searching the now multi-colored stage for any sign of the paper that they started with.
“Hey! I found it!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed as she pointed to a corner of the paper sticking out of the mess.She tugged on the corner and peeled the page off of the paint. They looked at it to inspect their “artwork”.
Applebloom was the first to speak. “I’m honestly having a hard time figuring out what we made.”
“Hmm...” Sweetie Belle concentrated as she examined all corners of the page. “It kinda looks like a manticore wearing a top hat, dancing with Applejack.”
“Who cares what it looks like?” Scootaloo responded. “It’s art. Let’s just sign it.”
Bobby was trying to figure out exactly what the Cutie Mark Crusaders had made, and he didn’t notice Twilight Sparkle walk up next to him.
“WHAT HAPPENED TO THE STAGE?” Twilight loudly exclaimed. Bobby jumped in surprise.
“Don’t do that, Twilight. I almost had a heart attack,” Bobby said as he caught his breath.
“Bobby, why is half the stage covered in paint?” Twilight asked.
“Well, the Cutie Mark Crusaders decided to try to get their cutie marks in painting, so they did a 30 minute art challenge. Then this happened.”
“Alright, I'll need all hooves on deck,” Twilight said. “We've got 2 days until the next show, and this stage needs to be spotless!”
* * *
“So, what do ya think, Bobby?” Applebloom said. “Can you show us how you do all of that tech stuff?”
Bobby thought about his response. If he said yes, the Cutie Mark Crusaders could damage some expensive equipment. However, if he said no, the three would probably go into ‘cute mode’ and give him diabetes.
“Okay, fine,” Bobby replied. “But you have to promise me to be very careful. This equipment is very expensive. Do you all understand?”
“Yes, sir!” They said in unison.
“Okay, let's go. Follow me!”
The three ran to the elevator. As Bobby joined them, he thought about what he had just done.
“This is not going to end well,” Bobby said under his breath as the doors closed.
