The Expected, Unexpected Twist

by PuckDaFolice

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders
Length: 11302

[HIE] A teen by the name of Lance finds himself living his normal and boring life, when all of a sudden, he finds himself in the 'exciting' land of Equestria. Full off sentient Griffins, Dragons, and--oh--Ponies.

[Human in Equestria]

[So if you don't like HIE's, you better not read this @_@]

This story is about a young adult by the name Lance. Just Lance. He lives quite normally, some might say boring. Lance disagrees, he thinks that life is an adventure! And indeed it is, it's just that Lance is too lazy to do something about it.

One summer though, he has his whole life turned upside-down (shocker), as he discovers a secret place that nobody else knows about. A place full of wondrous wonders, magical magic, and friendly friends!... It's Equestria, d'uh.

He gets turned into a Changeling too...joy.

[First Story BTW :3]
[Aaaaaand it's dead]

Published 2013-04-10 20:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-02 13:40:22 UTC

[01] Summer!!

Summer!!

"Alright! It's finally time to kick back and relax!" a boy with an onyx-colored hair, dived right at his bed. As he buried himself underneath the covers of his bed, he found himself practically melting and losing focus on his surroundings. Yes, his bed is that  comfortable, also there's this breeze he kept on feeling, perhaps it helped in exaggerating his rest. As the boy began his descent to sleep, a sound pierced the silence. "LANCE! LANCE? ARE YOU THERE? GET DOWN HERE!" a voice boomed from downstairs, causing the boy (or Lance as he is known) to flinch. He weighed his options, then decided it would be better to just go down than be barraged by that annoying voice again. As Lance flew off the covers, he decided to back-flip from his bed because he had nothing better to do...don't look at me like that! He's just really bored, I cannot emphasize it enough. As he jumped off the edge of his bed, he suddenly realized that someone had recently installed a Ceiling Fan in his room. "Oh shit" was the only thought he could muster as he propelled himself towards the spinning  wood chunks of doom.

A crashing sound could be heard from upstairs, followed by a loud "I'm OK!". "What the--..." a woman tilted her head at the sudden noise. "That Lance..." she muttered, placing her face on the palm of her hand. She sighed as she decided to check up on the mentioned boy.

Lance was sprawled on the floor, beneath a pile of wood and an electronic motor. His appendages were twisted in an odd manner, if anyone were to observed him, they'd say he broke his bones. Fortunately, he didn't, he's just a contortionist at heart. Lance groaned, not because he was in pain, but because the broken fan was causing his body to itch. As he bent his body one more time to reach his itchy heel, the door swung open, revealing a very displeased woman. "Lance..." she breathed, Lance gulped as he turned his head towards the voice. As he faced the furious expression on the woman's face, he gulped again "Hiya mom, hehe..."

~Meanwhile in a far-away place I'm sure all of you are familiar with...~

"Sister..." a voice rang in the room. "...Dear sister..." it repeated "I'm sure you are aware of the impending 'disaster' that might befall Canterlot--no--whole Equestria? If so what actions shall we take? We should take all precautions--SISTER! Are you even listening?!". The voice was coming from a tall, bluish Pony. The pony sports both wings and a horn, and has a flowing dark blue mane with hints of 'sparkling'. She was talking to (or at least trying to talk to) her supposed sister. A figure directly opposite her. Her sister is also opposite her in other ways. Instead of having a dark coat, her sister is covered in a pearly white coat, as well as being noticeably larger. Her sister's mane also has a more vibrant appearance, it contains multiple light colors as it sways in the air on its own.

"Of course I'm listening, dear Luna." the sister spoke in a soothing tone, eyes fixed on Luna.

"Liar! You were playing with your mane again Tia!" Luna spat.

"Excuse me Luna, I'm not 'playing with my mane', I'm --adjusting it, is all! A princess does have to look presentable, correct?" the larger sister shot back while ruffling her mane with one of her front hooves. Luna stared at her sister as she applied some sort of cream to her smooth mane, when she suddenly burst into giggles. Luna's sister tilted her head at the giggling Alicorn.

"Oh--oh--hehehe--Celestia!--hehe--you should--you should see your mane!--hahaha! Your MANE!" Luna chortled. Celestia paused, before reaching up her mane once more. Celestia let out a sharp gasp as she realized what her sister had done.

"Lu-Luna--did you really--...h-how could you?!" Luna stopped laughing and looked at a teary-eyed Celestia. A teary-eyed, bald Celestia. A teary-eyed, bald, and angry Celestia.

Luna immediately shuddered "Uh-oh, this does not bode well...". Luna looked at Celestia's bare head and laughed again "No! No! Thi-haha-this situation is totally w-worth T-Tia's disapproval--hahaha!"

~Back to Earth~

"I can't believe mom is making me buy another ceiling fan...with my own money!" Lance sighed as he strode out of the front door of his house, fetching his brown jacket on the way. It was almost night, shadows were dancing around the pavement already, as Lance jogged to the Thrift shop. "If I'm gonna buy something that expensive, I might as well try to have some money left to survive summer..." he mumbled to no one in particular. Litter was scattered everywhere on the street, mainly because Lance lived in a sub-urban area. He never did like it there, it was too noisy and stinky, too...sub-urban. He preferred the peace and quiet of villages, where he can walk on the street without fear of being abducted, beat-up murdered, ra--you get the drill. Anyway, as Lance neared the Thrift shop, he felt a disturbing presence. The feeling where you walk in a dark hallway all alone and your brain decides it's a fun time to imagine all sorts of creatures allegedly lurking in the dark. Creatures wanting to know what flavor you are. Creatu--"Enough!" Lance whispered harshly, shaking his head. Lance collected his drifting mind and marched straight into the shop, only to be stopped by a very transparent glass door. Lance huffed as he picked himself up from the cold ground "Dammit..." he cursed. "Get it together Lance..." Lance turned his head to where the door was. It was very visible in fact, there was even a prominent "OPEN" sign hung on it. Lance just shook his head and proceeded to push on the door. As Lance put his foot in the cramped room, a blast of cold, fresh air met his face. Lance winced at the sudden attack of wind, then opened his eyes, not even realizing he closed them in the first place. His eyes explored the room, looking for anything that could have cause such a cold assault. After a few scans of the crowded room, Lance decided that he saw nothing out of the ordinary. Recollecting his thoughts, Lance trudged over what appears to be the counter of the shop. He hit the bell placed near the unattended counter. *ding!* Lance took one more look at the room, this time with a different target in mind. *ding!* Lance hit the bell once more as he found what he was looking for. *ding!* An antique looking ceiling fan, situated between a musty looking crate and a karaoke machine. Lance did a quick view on the machine then declared to himself "Not too shabby".

"Quite" a frail voice spoke up. Lance froze, and slowly turned his head to the general direction of the voice...the counter.

"Wait, what?" Lance blinked, trying to figure out if the counter had really spoken to him. After a few silent seconds passed, Lance managed to speak out "H-Hello?"

"Down here, sonny" the voice repeated in a slightly agitated tone.

Lance looked down to see a midget peering at him, a thin smile on the midget's face. "What can I get for you?" the midget waved his hand around the room, demonstrating the piles of stuff, waiting to be sold.

"Uh," Lance started "yeah, I guess that fan would be nice." he said, pointing to the mentioned machinery.

The midget's face formed a queer smile. "You have...good taste, sir" he rubbed his tiny hands in anticipation. The midget waddled over to the fan and picked it up. As he bent over to grab the fan, Lance swore that the midget looked like a ball when bending.

[02] A Cold Breeze...

A Cold Breeze...

Lance sighed heavily. Finally he was home at last! Lance grabbed at the doorknob on his front door, only to find it wouldn't turn. "Oh c'mon.." Lance breathed, dusting his palms on the front of his jeans. Lance reached for the doorknob again, attempting to try his luck once more in opening the confounded door. As Lance's right hand gripped the brass menace, the door swung open, pushing Lance's hand (and Lance) away. "Fu--!" Lance cried, as he landed on the wooden porch with a thud. Lance tended to his battered back-side, muttering something about doors being the bane of all living things. After attending to his sore bottom, Lance tilted his head up, facing the figure standing in the doorway. The figure was none other than Lance's mom, staring him down. Lance promptly stood up, "Hiya' mom...hehe..." His mom kept staring at him.

"Where's the fan?" she questioned in a neutral tone.

Lance grinned nervously. "Here ma-.." he gulped, handing her a plastic bag. Lance's mother took it from Lance's hands, and motioned for Lance to come in. "Well...that went better than expected." he mused as he entered his home, the capital of boredom, as he jokingly refers to it. Lance went into the living room and dived at the couch, completely oblivious to the fact that there were two eyes peeking from outside the window in mentioned room.

"Excellent...all in due time...he seems to be the perfect specimen..."

"Ah! This sofa is comfy..." Lance drooled as he rolled over and fell from the couch, seemingly unconscious.

"...almost perfect"

"TIA! I swear I'm sooorrryyy!!" Luna beat her wings furiously in a desperate attempt to widen the gap between her and her sister as they soared in the cold Canterlot night. Celestia snorted.

"I do not care! I shall send you to the moon once more! ...Or better yet, the sun!! You ruined my mane, how could you?!" Celestia practically cried.

Luna gulped "Not the Sun! Anywhere but the SUN!" When all of a sudden, the Sun Princess as well as the Moon Princess suddenly stopped their antics. "Do you...do you feel that sister?" Luna asked, landing down near the Canterlot garden.

Celestia nodded "It feels like what you were attempting to put a stop to, has now started it's course"

"We could have never stopped it in the first place...We must..." Luna gulped then smiled sheepishly at her sister. "We must put aside our silly sibling fight and figure out what we shall do."

Celestia raised an eyebrow as her hooves touched the cool grass of the garden "Indeed."

"...I don't wanna go to school mom!..." Lance mumbled in his sleep. His mother smiled down at him as she set him down on his bed. With a slight peck to the cheek, Lance's mother turned to walk out the door. She suddenly stopped, feeling a strong gush of wind to blow through her. 'Huh,' she thought 'Must have left a window op--wait a minute it's summer...of course I'll be leaving windows open!'. Lance's mother chuckled to herself as she closed her only son's door. "Hope you have pleasant dreams..." she muttered as she descended down the stairs, completely forgetting the fact that her sleeping son mentioned something about school in an unpleasant manner.

"Furry Wrinkle?! I thought you were retired!" Lance screamed at the teacher standing in front of him. The teacher gave an insulted look.

"It's Periwinkle, and no, I'm not retired. Well, I will retire, after summer ends..." the teacher retorted.

To say Lance was shocked is a pretty accurate statement. His eyes darted everywhere, examining the gray block structure erected behind the teacher, in detail. Lance shook his head furiously "No...no...no...this...this is impossible! School should have ended and Summer should have started ye--"

"Next year" Periwinkle cut him off, staring at Lance dead in the eyes. Eyes whose pupils suddenly jerked upwards. Lance made a gurgling sound when he crumpled to the pavement.

"Gah!" Lance woke up, violently shaking. "Wait..." Lance eyed his surroundings "...just....just a dream. No, wait, that was a nightmare!" Lance shivered slightly, not because he was scared, but because a cool breeze blew past him. Lance stopped shaking "Wait a minute...that breeze...". Lance looked around, confused. After a few seconds of useless 'observation', Lance decided to just sleep it off when a gleam caught his eye. Up on the ceiling, was the fan Lance had bought from the shop. The gleam was coming from the center of the said fan. Lance quickly rubbed his eyes and continued staring at the fan. After a few more seconds of nothing but watching, the fan suddenly spun on it's own. Lance froze then suddenly remembered what the midget from the store had told him about the fan. It ran on wind and not on electricity. "Well that's stupid, it's supposed to give me fresh air when there's none around and yet it needs wind to start up" Lance snorted. "Ah, heck I need to sleep now..."

As Lance's head hit the pillows, the fan spun wildly. The gleam becoming brighter and brighter as the whole fan was consumed by light. Lance winced in his sleep, obviously disturbed by the flash. The fan however, kept on spinning, producing a much brighter light. A light that filled up the whole room.

The light disappeared, so did Lance. Lance, whose last thoughts while on his bed attempting to sleep, was 'Wait--who put the fan in my room?'

[03] The Land of Magical Talking Horses

The Land of Magical Talking Horses

"Luna, I'm afraid that I sense it nearer, as of now." Celestia said, while furiously writing on a piece of worn out parchment. Luna flinched but kept pacing around the throne room. The only sound that could be hear for a while was the scribbling of a quill and the clopping (the normal clopping) of hooves.

"Sister..." Luna spoke out, catching Celestia's attention "Should we tell the Bearers?" Celestia looked over from her completed letter and set aside the quill on the throne. Celestia's horn glowed a healthy yellow for a while as did the letter, as said letter lifted in mid-air. Suddenly the letter disappeared with a transition that looked as if the letter ate itself.

"I already informed my faithful student to be on the look-out for anything strange." Celestia replied. Luna visibly relaxed for a while but suddenly tensed up. So did Celestia.

"It's here" they proclaimed simultaneously.

The sun hit Lance's face fairly quickly, quicker than he was used to. Lance groaned as he flailed his arms around, effectively hitting the side of the cave he was apparently in. 'Wait, cave?!' Lance woke abruptly, eyeing his surroundings. "Oh shit, I am in a cave!" Lance's voice echoed strangely in the cave. Lance tried to stand up on his legs but found it impossible. Why? Well, because he's a quadrupedal now, shocking I know. Lance eyed his arms, only to be greeted by black and holed stumps. "Are these...hooves?" Lance asked to no one in particular, as he eyed the ends of the stumps. Lance was sitting on his haunches as he examined every part of his body that he can see. All of them were black, slick, and holed. "I've had weirder dreams..." Lance assured himself. Lance stretched his body a tad awkwardly, creating a cracking sound he didn't expect "That sounded morbid..." he mumbled. Deciding he ought to get used to his "dream body", Lance stood unsteadily on all fours. He grinned to himself as he managed to maintain this position. Lance cleared his throat (which sounds like a farting sound actually) "OK then...I've got standing...now for some walking, or was it trotting? Ah whatever!"

"Another beautiful day in Ponyville!" exclaimed a purple-esque horned pony. Or you can just call her Twilight Sparkle, personal student of the Sun Princess and. Twilight Sparkle trotted over to a large oaken tree resembling a house. Because it is a house. Twilight's house. Twilight's library/house thing, called "Golden Oaks Library". Using her unicorn magic, the door swung open, revealing a distressed small purple dragon by the name of..."Spike! What's wrong? You look like you have Gem indigestion! Do you? I know the proper procedures to--*BELCH*--cure you..." Twilight was hit in the face by a piece of rolled-up parchment.

"Ugh, oh man, that hurt..." Spike complained, rubbing his belly. Twilight rolled her eyes as she levitated the letter inside. As soon as Twilight Sparkle manage to sort things out in the library (though admittedly Spike did a good job of cleaning up), she unfurled the letter and began to read.

To my faithful student, Twilight Sparkle

My sister and I have discovered a rapidly growing energy throughout Equestria. We do not now what could possibly be the cause of this; Discord has been reformed, Queen Chrysalis has been forced to scurry back to her hive, and King Sombra has been...eliminated. We are truly worried on what might the power source be, but I ask you and your friends to keep an eye out for any suspicious activity and report back via Spike, immediately.

With love, Princess Celestia

P.S. Could you be so kind as to ask your friend, Rarity to produce a giant hat for me? I know how she loves giant hats, as well as making them, and I am in dire need of one. If it's no hassle to her that is.

Twilight finished reading the letter and curled it back up, flinging it to an oblivious Spike. "Spike! I'll head off to Rarity's for a while, keep an eye on the library again. Don't worry, I'll be back soon!" Twilight galloped away, leaving a mumbling Spike alone.

"But I wanted to go to Rarity's..."

"So, I've got trotting down." Lance reminded himself, as he paced around the cave. The sun was high in the sky, meaning it had to be around afternoon. "This...this is a pretty long dream" Lance looked up to the sky, only to withdraw his head. "Damn, that sun is bright!!" Lance spun around to face the innards of the cave, examining it in detail. Lance had a sudden realization. "I have freaking ultra-vision! This is epic. Heh, maybe this dream isn't so bad after all" A sound behind Lance caused him to freeze. He heard crunching noises, like a pair of feet(hooves?) is treading on the fallen leaves just outside of the cave. Ever so slowly, Lance turned his head to spot any possible threat that could, um, threaten him.

All of a sudden, Lance was staring at the eyes of a minty colored...unicorn. "A Changeling!" the unicorn shrieked in a high-pitched voice. Lance assumed the unicorn was female.

"A...what?" Lance croaked out, confused. Lance tried to near the mare, but every step he takes forward, the unicorn takes one backwards in response. Lance could feel the tension emanating from the unicorn.

"P-p-please don't hurt me! I have no love to give!" the unicorn cried. If only she listened to Twilight and studied up on more magic, she could have easily teleported away from the changeling in front of her.

Lance tilted his head, creating a sickening *snap!* sound "Love? Wha-...I'm not gonna rape you!"

The look on the unicorn's face was a mixture of confusion, fear, and embarrassment. "Rape?..." she whispered. "What?..." A deadly (and awkward) silence made itself known with a cricket rubbing it's hind-legs to create that distinctive sound only failed performers and their audience would know.

"So..." Lance began, stepping back "I'm just...gonna go back to my cave and...take a nap?" Lance suddenly felt the tension from the mare cease and be replaced by utter confusion.

"Um...sure...changeling..." the unicorn cocked an eyebrow "...I'll, see you later? Hopefully not though." the mare began to back out off the cave and into the woods.

"Uh yeah, bye?" Lance called out, the unicorn disappearing from view. "Huh" Lance mumbled "That was interesting...so I met a unicorn... a freaking unicorn. This dream is pretty funny. What's next huh, a pegasus? Dragons? Chimeras?  Hahaha." Unbeknownst to Lance, he will be meeting pegasi soon. Royal guards to be exact.

[04] A Friendly Encounter with the Guards

A Friendly Encounter with the Guards

Lance woke up from his nap, rubbing his eyes (which was pretty difficult, considering the fact that he had stumps instead of fingers). Groaning, Lance looked out of the mouth of the cave and spotted the setting sun. Lance buried his face on his hoof like appendages, mumbling "Shit, this isn't really a dream, is it?...I should have woken up by now." Shaking his head, Lance looked up again at the sun. "Then where am I? Is this a hallucination or shit?" Lance sighed "I don't do drugs...usually, so drug hallucination is still a possibility..." Lance kept on talking to himself. "Ah dammit, whatever, I'mma just explore this forest thing. Waiting isn't gonna get crap done" Lance stood on all fours, then proceeded to gallop towards the forest.

Lance made it to the heart of the forest in 10 seconds minutes flat. Running wasn't a strenuous activity, however Lance still felt like he had been running for hours. Lance panted as he sat on his haunches, examining the landscape. "...Damn...I haven't felt this worn out since...uh...last time I worked out...yeah...work out..." Lance shook his head, in an attempt to gather his bearings. Lance sighed "OK then...so...the first thing I should do is look for a body of water..."

After a few minutes (...or was it hours? Lance wasn't sure) of futile exploration, Lance saw nothing of value, except for the moon nestled in the night sky. "I'm freaking thiiirsty...." Lance complained. Lance continued to trek the woods, accompanied by nothing but the sounds of his hooves crunching the fallen leaves. Lance didn't notice for a while, but it looked like all the leaves were stripped from the nearby trees. 'Must be fall here' Lance thought, hopping over a pile of rocks.,,and then failing, he appeared to have forgotten he wasn't bipedal anymore. "Fuck..." Lance groaned, his face stuck on the ground in a comical manner. Lance forced his head off the earth, spitting out dirt in the process. "Now I'm even more thirsty..." Lance whined. After a while of useless moping, Lance's ears picked up a distant sound.

:"...why we even have to scout White Tail Woods..."

"...the Princess's orders..."

"...alright then..."

Lance froze, not sure what to make of the voices he heard. The last time he made contact with a local wasn't exactly a fond moment. In fact, said local appeared to fear him and called him a "Changeling" or something. Lance thought for a while, Maybe he could befriend the owner of the voices, no that's stupid. they'll probably flee or something. Maybe he could threaten them? Yeah, that's probably a good idea, scare them and then force them to escort him to water or better yet civilization! 'Nothing can go wrong...' Lance thought, grinning stupidly to himself.

A pair of armor-clad Pegasi made their way through White Tail Woods, spears in tow. One of the winged ponies put out a hoof to stop his darker companion from proceeding any further. "What gives Cloud Roller?" the pegasus asked. Cloud Roller pointed his spear at a spot in the path, it appeared to have been recently disturbed.

"See that Mist Flicker?" Cloud Roller asked, to which Mist Flicker nodded. Readying their respective weapons, the pair trudged through the woods in a more cautious manner. A sudden movement near Cloud Roller caught Mist Flicker's eye.

"Watch out, Cloud!" Mist Flicker cried, shoving his companion off his hooves. The bush that apparently made the movement, stopped shaking, and a dark figure popped out. "It's a damn changeling!"

"OoOoOoOoOohHh!!" the changeling mocked. It stood about five foot tall, hovering over the surprised guards. It was larger than any of the other changeling the guards have encountered before. The changeling took a step forward in what it hoped to be an intimidating manner, unfortunately for this changeling, Royal Guards were trained to have wills of steel. And these Royal Guards were war veterans from when the changeling invasion occurred.

"DIE FOUL BEAST!!"

'Ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit' Lance looked at the charging duo, with spears held by their...hooves? What's up with that? Lance would have been dumbfounded at how a flat surface such as a hoof would be able to grasp a weapon, but unfortunately, he was in no position to question physics or lack thereof. "STOP!" Lance  yelled, hoping to restrain the pegasi from moving "If you don't...I'll...I'll...rape you!"

The guards froze, a flurry of emotions emanating from them. But one feeling stood out, utter confusion. The guards loosened their grip on the spears. They mouthed the same question in unison.

"What?!"

"Rarity! Are you in?" Twilight Sparkle knocked on the door with her hooves.

"Sweetie Belle! Could you be a dear and let Twilight in? Please?" A regal sing-song voice spoke out. The door swung open, revealing a pure colored unicorn filly standing on the doorway.

"Come on in Twilight, my sister is a bit busy with orders today. She didn't even let me crusading today...said she needed a helping hoof...." the filly said, almost pouting. Twilight smiled at the filly. Every time Rarity was busy with anything, she would ask anypony (or dragon) nearby to help her. 'Poor Sweetie Belle...Maybe Spike can help, I bet he'd love to spend some time here...' Twilight thought, as she trotted in the boutique. She spotted trails of fabric scattered everywhere, ponyquins toppled over, with drapes of random accessories attached to them. To make a long-story short, the Carousel Boutique was in ruins.

An alabaster-colored unicorn came in the room, her silky purple mane that was usually well-groomed had been arranged (unintentionally) in a messy manner. "Oh, Twilight! I'm so sorry you have to see the Boutique in this...state" the unicorn cried. The unicorn stressed words in a manner that upper-class ponies would.

"Oh Rarity, I've seen the library in worse condition..." Twilight chirped. Rarity flinched, wondering how in Equestria that was possible, considering that her boutique looked like a tornado hit it. Shaking her head to disperse these thoughts, Rarity smiled at Twilight.

"So Twilight, what brings you here?" Rarity's smile twitched a bit, quite an obvious sign of stress.

Twilight fidgeted a bit, she didn't want to give Rarity more work to do...but her mentor asked for a hat. Although, Princess Celestia did mention that if it were a hassle, Rarity wouldn't have to create one. "Princess Celestia asked if it were alright with you to make her a large hat...if it weren't such a hassle" Twilight said, smiling sheepishly,

Rarity's smile widened "Oh it's no problem at all, darling! Especially is Princess Celestia herself asked for it. I'll have it done as soon as possible!" Twilight let out a sigh as Rarity exited the room, supposedly off to work.

"That was easy." Twilight smiled. "Oh...wait...Rarity!" Twilight cried out again.

Rarity's head appeared in the doorway, her glasses askew "Yes dear?"

Twilight Sparkle cleared her throat. "If you want I can have Spike help out. He's already done with his chores, and is probably relaxing now, but I'm sure that he would love to help out!" Twilight asked with a knowing smile.

Rarity smiled even wider "Yes! Of course darling! That would be a great help, thank you!"

"It's no problem, Rarity."

Lance took the surprised expression on the guards' faces to as a cue to escape. "Catch 'ya later!" Lance chortled, speeding through the woods with whatever energy he had left. The stunned guards just stood there, unaware that the changeling has managed to flee from them.

"S-snap out of it Mist!" Cloud Roller lightly jabbed Mist Flicker's face.

"W-what?"

"The changeling's getting away! Let's fly!" Cloud Roller's wings popped out.

Lance had managed to create a decent distance from the guards and himself. Looking back, Lance noticed that the guards have decided to take to the skies and are currently gaining on him. "Oh--shit..they're really pegasi?!...Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck..." Lance panted random curse words as he trekked White Tail Woods.

Lance just didn't know what went wrong.

[05] Visiting Ponyville

Visiting Ponyville

The pegasi guards were gaining in on Lance, whose desperate attempts at outrunning them caused him to go breathless.  Still, he wasn't going to give up any time soon. 'I should probably think of a plan to lose 'em.' Lance thought, taking a mental note of his surroundings. Lance huffed and puffed as he ran through the woods, when an idea finally struck him. Smiling inwardly, Lance took a somewhat focused look ahead of him. 'Ah Ha! There we go!' Lance thought.

Now running with new-found vigor, Lance manage to widen the gap a bit once more as he finally neared his destination. A tree with a loose branch. Lance thought 'I could probably get that by biting it', as he leaped a bit to snatch the twig. A satisfying *crack* sound met Lance's ears, as well as the distasteful flavor of wood in his mouth (no sexual innuendo intended). Lance managed to land perfectly, on all four hooves. Mentally congratulating himself for the accomplishment, Lance turned his head to see that the pair is now merely four feet away.

'I have to time this perfectly...' Lance thought, expertly dodging a boulder. The pegasi got closer.

'Three'

'Two'

'One'

The guards accelerated themselves, spears in tow. 'NOW!' Lance mentally shouted to himself, while simultaneously flinging the branch from his maw and into the face of the lighter-colored guard.

"What the--?!" Cloud Roller managed to cry out, before being poked in the eye by the stick. "AUUUGHH!!" Cloud Roller scremed, flying wildly "MY EYE! MY EYE!! OH CELESTIA, WHY?!" His wild thrashings caused him to hit his partner, Mist Flicker, by the side. This caused both of the guards to propel downwards.

Lance stopped running, there was no need to, the pegasi pair propelled onto a particular pond. Their yelps of terror could probably be heard throughout the woods. Lance tried to laugh but then realized something. They crashed into a body of water. This reminded Lance of his extreme thirst and his exhaustion. 'Aw crap' Lance thought 'I can't go to the pond now! Oh wait...maybe there's a stream nearby?'

Lance trotted over to where he believed the duo crashed, careful to hide in the shadows. Looking from behind a pile of fallen leaves, Lance spotted the guards fly out off the water with relative ease. Lance heard them start another conversation.

"That was *sputter* interesting..." Cloud Roller mumbled, while spinning in the air to get rid of unwanted moisture.

His partner, Mist Flicker flew up beside him and did the same thing "Should we still try to catch it?"

Cloud Roller shook his head "No. He's probably long gone by now, and returned to their Hive. We might even get lured into a trap, that Changeling was strangely cunning... We have to go back to Canterlot and inform the Princesses of what we've found. Let's fly."

Mist Flicker nodded in agreement, before skyrocketing even higher into the air with his partner.

Lance poked his head from the bushes, "H'uh...". Lance slowly trotted over to the edge of the pond. Peering in the water, he saw his reflection for the very first time. "Dayum, I look ugly. Cool, but ugly!" Lance had a holed horn protruding from his head, ending in a curve. His jet-black face was dotted with blue eyes. He also had a miniature fang poking out of his mouth. Shrugging off the discovery of his face, Lance tilted his head and began to drink from the pond. 'That's strange...' Lance thought. He could feel the water inside his mouth, but his thirst wasn't quenched. 'I'll...try that again' Lance began sipping from the pond once more, only this time, he heard running water. "What the heck?" Lance stopped drinking, and began to look around. Lance finally noticed what was making the light sound, it was him. The holes were obviously not just for decoration, with water spilling out everywhere he had holes (again, no sexual innuendo intended).

Lance froze in sudden realization. "I can't drink...and now that I think about it, I probably can't eat too...What the hell body?! This is stupid!" Lance  cried out his frustrations. "Now how the hell am i supposed to get rid of this damn thirst?" Lance whispered harshly to himself. Shaking his head, Lance noticed a somewhat large stream in a distance. "If there's running water...there's civilization, well hopefully...I ought to follow it...someone better has answers. I just wish they're not hostile."

As Lance followed the stream in the direction he was sure would lead to civilization, he began to recount the earlier events. 'So apparently I'm some sort of mutated or burnt/beat up creature that provokes either hostility or fear...I also met a fucking talking unicorn and two pegasi intent on adding more holes to my body. Well, I probably had it coming, since I scared the shit out of them...or at least tried to...' Lance continued onward, looking longingly at the slowly rising sun.

Twilight Sparkle exited the library, a smile plastered on her face. As she began her short journey back to the boutique to fetch Spike as well as the hat her mentor ordered for, she noticed two blurs overhead.

'Royal Guards? Why do they look battered? Oh well, I'll probably never know...never know...never...NO!' Twilight looked up frantically at the skies, not noticing that the guards have managed to make their way to Canterlot in those quick moments of thinking. "Oh..." Twilight sighed "I guess I could ask the Princess...but I don't think it's any of my business to..." Twilight continued her trek to Carousel Boutique, her smiled faded just a bit.

Lance finally made it to the edge of the woods. Scanning the area, Lance spotted a wooden bridge that was obviously used to cross the now-stream, he grinned a bit. "Bingo...sign of said civilizati--*cough*" Lance coughed and sputtered, creating a sound akin to air being let out of a balloon. 'I really need some help.' Lance thought, gingerly trotting out of the woods. The sunlight glistened on his shiny-black carapace.

Lance took a brief look around him, spotting a sort of town in the distance with the aid of his ultra-vision. Lance smiled to himself. "Almost...there" he croaked, limping his way to Ponyville.

Twilight began to drag a limp Spike away from the Boutique. "Sheesh Spike," Twilight huffed "Did you..did you gain some weight?"

Spike nodded, a goofy smile plastered on his face. "Rarity was so sweet, she gave me a lot of gems for helping her out." Spike said, voice brimming with admiration.

Twilight deadpanned, then shook her head as they tread onward to Golden Oaks Library. Twilight began to notice the lack of ponies milling about, but she dismissed it as the effect of an early morning. But after she passed the marketplace, she knew something was wrong. Applejack wasn't there with her cart. The cart was there, but well, it was overturned with apples scattered about. "Spike." Twilight said, growing visibly uneasy. "Spike are you seeing this?"

Spike began to come to his sense, taking a look around, he shrugged. "What? There's nopony out there."

Twilight nodded "Exactly! See that?" Twilight pointed at Applejack's cart/stand.

Spike, growing a tad bit impatient, turned his head and looked at the cart. "Yeah...that's Applejack's cart right? So what of it, Twi, I don't get it!" Spike threw his arms in the air.

Twilight facehoofed "It's just like when Zecora first visited. Nopony's around. Not even AJ, and she's a morning pony!"

After that piece of information sunk in, Spike muttered a simple "Oh."

Twilight let out a disappointed sigh "Oh well, I suppose we have to figure what's wrong this ti--" Twilight stopped, noticing sudden movement at the entrance of town. It was a changeling, and it looked exhausted. It raised it's shiny black head and looked around, meeting Twilight's own calculating eyes.

The changeling cocked it's head. "H-hi?" it croaked out, before crumpling on the ground with a thud.

[06] Meeting the Mane 6 - Part 1

Meeting the Mane 6 - Part 1

Lance groaned, where was he? Oh right, he went to a town in hopes of being given medical attention...then he saw that unicorn, and well, he blacked out. Lance fidgeted a bit, strange, he couldn't see anything. Lance's ultra-vision should have granted him the ability to see in the dark...but, well, it's dark, and he couldn't see anything. Lance stopped for a moment, he tried to wiggle his appendages but they felt stiff.

"Ah think it's awake now, Twi!" a voice spoke out in a southern drawl.

'H'uh?' Lance craned his head to where he thought the voice came from. "H-hello?" Lance croaked, voice still broken with thirst. As soon as Lance spoke those words, he suddenly felt something in the air. Fear and uncertainty.

"What the--it jus' talked Twilight!" the voice cried. Lance cringed at the name.

"I told you girls that it could talk! Just like Queen Chrysalis." a new voice replied. 'Chrysalis? Why does that name sound so...familiar?...' Lance thought.

"I think we should just beat the ponyfeathers out of him...or her...or it!" another voice cried out, impatience evident in the tone.

"Ponyfeathers?" Lance breathed. "What kind of word is *cough* p-ponyfeathers?" Lance asked.

This time, a regal sounding voice intervened "I highly doubt a changeling would know such crude Equestrian-terms, Rainbow Dash."

'Equestria?' Lance thought 'Rainbow Dash? Why the hell does this sound so familia--..oh no..oh no, no, no! Please don't tell me...but it's all adding up...unicorns...pegasi...dumb names like Twilight and Chyrsalis..." Lance gulped "Am...am I in Ponyland?"

"Ponyville" a voice corrected "And we're the ones asking the questions, Changeling."

Lance gulped again,"Um...ok..." still trying to grasp his current situation. A sound suddenly filled the room, it was reminiscent to the sound of twinkling. Afterwards, Lance felt something being lifted off of his head. 'Oh' Lance thought 'A box? Huh, must have been the thing covering my--" Lance looked ahead, he appeared to be surrounded by four ponies. Two unicorns, one pegasus, and a regular pony. His jaw dropped as soon as he realized what he was really looking at.

See, Lance's father was a hard-core brony, going to conventions, mixing up music, creating fanfics, and participating in roleplays. His father constantly pestered Lance to follow him in his hoofsteps. Lance eventually gave in and tried to watch a few episodes. It wasn't so bad, it's just that Lance  felt a little less manly after watching. In the end, Lance's dad went on a business trip that Lance highly suspected as another  convention. He never did return, that was over a month ago and Lance's family never heard from him again. Since then, Lance had been stalking the internet where bronies frequented. Forums, Equestria daily, you name it. That's when he discovered his father's username: "LunaIsBestPony_69" had been frequently online. To make a long story short, Lance ended up disliking the MLP franchise a bit more. I wouldn't go too far as to say, Lance hated the ponies, but he's far from being a fan.

Back to the present, Lance was currently gawking at four of the mane six (as he remembered the fandom's term for the bearers). Lance was presented with Twilight; who locked her eyes at him in a fierce gaze, there was the orange cowboy one; who appear to have been fidgeting with her Stetson...what was her name again?...Applesauce? Anyway, there were two more ponies in front of him, a prim and proper looking unicorn, whom Lance recognized as Rarity, was busy ruffling her mane; and the last one Rainbow Dash--...wait, where was Rainbow Dash? As if to answer the question, a sudden cyan blur met Lance's face.

"Ow, what the fuck girl?!" Lance cried as he fell to the wooden floor, his chair creating a crashing sound. Rarity cringed at the outburst of profanity, she wasn't entirely sure what it meant, but Lance had shrieked it in such an unpleasant manner, it just had to be a curse.

"Rainbow Dash!" Twilight screamed, glaring daggers at her pegasus companion.

"Tsk, I got it Twilight, I--hey! What are you doing?" Rainbow Dash had started to launch another punch at Lance's face when a blue aura engulfed and immobilized her hoof.

"Really now Rainbow Dash, there is no need for violence." Rarity scoffed, looking displeased as she released the spell.

Rainbow Dash grumbled, as she put her hoof down "Ah, whatever..."

"Now then." Twilight remarked, clearing her throat "Why are you here, Changeling?"

Lance looked up at the Element of Magic, before promptly being lifted together with his chair into an upright position with the help of a certain purple aura. "I have a name, you know." Lance spat.

Twilight raised an eyebrow, confused. According to Twilight's books, only high-ranking Changelings such as royalty deserved proper names. The rest had mere numbers assigned to them. "So...what is it then?"

Lance grinned, "It's Lance, 'ya egghead."

Rainbow Dash stifled a chuckle, Rarity and Applejack just rolled their eyes, while Twilight didn't look too pleased. Twilight cleared her throat again. "OK then, Lance," spite evident in Twilight's voice "Why are you here?"

Lance stopped smiling suddenly realizing his situation, he probably pissed off one of the few ponies who would know how to help him. "I need medical attention." Lance stated nonchalantly. Lance felt a sudden shift in the atmosphere; confusion, a feeling he knew all too well.

An awkward silence ensued, before Twilight broke it by asking "Excuse me?"

Lance squirmed a bit, "Um...you see, uh...I feel...thirsty, but I can't drink water, you see...so..."

Twilight's eyes was suddenly filled with acknowledgment. "You're in need of serious love!" Twilight blurted out.

Lance mouth fell open "What?...WHAT?! I don't need sex! I don't dig ponies! What are you--..."

The whole room suddenly burst into a fit of laughter. Rainbow Dash had fallen to the floor, wiping out tears from her eyes. "Applesauce" was laughing heartily, while furiously pounding the floor with her front-hoof. Rarity and Twilight's cheeks were covered in a shade of red.

"Oh my, how, straightforward..." Rarity stuttered, obviously taken aback.

Twilight just stood there, mouth agape a sound reverberating from her throat that sounded like: "D'uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhh...."

Lance was totally bewildered by the sight in front of him. What did he say? He was honestly not interested in the mares before him, and he wasn't horny. Just because he has a horn sticking out of his head, doesn't mean he's horny... Stop thinking about horns already!

Lance finally cleared his throat before asking; "Did I say something weird?"

The whole room stopped with their respective antics, even Twilight managed to regain her composure. After hearing what Lance asked, they all collectively face-hoofed.

[07] Meeting the Mane 6 - Part 2

Meeting the Mane 6 - Part 2

"Um..." Lance started, awkwardly looking at the ponies present. "Was is it something I said?" Lance tilted his head, almost making him look innocent...almost. Twilight stared down at Lance with a blank expression, causing him to squirm uncomfortably against his binds.  "So, uh...care to--*cough*--help a guy out?" Lance chirped, smiling sheepishly at Twilight.

The Element of Magic raised an eyebrow "You're asking for love?"

Lance did a spit-take, "What?! What is it with you ponies and thinking I wanna fu--buck you?" Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash and Applejack started another giggling riot.

Twilight shifted as well, her face reddening once more. "And what is it with you changelings with all the sex jokes?..." Twilight stammered.

"Well I'm not the one asking for it!" Lance shot back, his own dark mask glowing with a tinge of...not red, but green.

Rarity noticed this change in color "Excuse me...er, 'sir', but might I ask, are you blushing?" she inquired.

Lance quickly shook his head, while stating: "Nopenopenopenopenopenope" in rapid succession. The sudden movement of Lance's head threw his chair off balance, crashing it onto the floor for the second time. This display of pure idiocy caused the two most athletic ponies in the room to erupt into laughter.

Lance remained on the floor, not moving.

"Oh, man oh, man, this changeling's not so--Hahaha--not so bad!" Rainbow Dash declared, tears forming at the corners of her eyes.

Applejack nodded, "Ah dun' think he's much ofa threat, Twi! He's too darn foalish! Ahahaha!"

The laughter died down after a few minutes, Lance appeared to have been knocked out from the crash. Twilight reluctantly poked the fallen changeling, but it elicited no response. Nervously, Twilight looked at her fellow bearers. "Do you think we...killed it?"

Rainbow Dash shook her head "N'ah, their armor's tough as nails. I learned that the hard way, and I mean literally." Rainbow Dash shuddered at the memory, suddenly jerking her hind-hooves.

Twilight nodded, examining the "unconscious" heap of chitin in front of her. Twilight spaced out for a moment, just staring at the Lance, then proceeded to instill magic upon Lance.

"Hey, what are you doing?" asked Rainbow Dash, floating a few inches below the ceiling.

Twilight clucked her tongue as she directed more energy to her horn, causing it to glow a purple hue everypony was all too familiar with. Gritting her teeth she said, "I'm trying out this spell I read about. It's supposed to give the caster a brief overview on the target's intentions. It's kind of like a mind-reading spell but less complicated and less immoral. With this, we'll be able to tell what his Hive is planning"

In a few seconds, the light disappeared from her horn, and Twilight Sparkle let out a slight gasp. "What is it Twi?" the cowpony asked, concern filling her face.

Twilight took another glance at Lance (hey that rhymed) then shook her head. "I sense nothing. Absolutely nothing" Twilight declared, looking quite disturbed.

Rarity eyed the changeling as well. "Whatever do you mean by that, darling?" Rarity asked.

Twilight turned to look at her fellow unicorn "It means I feel no hostility, but no friendliness from it--I mean, Lance."

Applejack bobbed her head in agreement "Ah really doubt dat dis changeling is even evil."

"I'm still having suspicions about it though..." Twilight stated, eyebrows furrowed. Applejack was just about to retort something when a knock on the door drew everypony's attention. "Come on in!" Twilight invited. The door swung open to reveal a butter-yellow pegasus with half her of her face covered by her pink mane. Looking around nervously the newcomer spotted the knocked-out changeling and began to let out an "eep!" sound.

The pegasus took a step back, when a sudden push from behind caused her to come stumbling inside the library. "Come on, Fluttershy! This is no time to be--well, shy! Hey at least that rhymed! Speaking of rhyming I've been thinking of becoming a poet, ooh! Ooh! I have a new rhyme--uh...um...actually it's pretty hard to rhyme on purpose. I think it's, like a curse...wait a minute... Oh hey, is that the Changeling? *gasp* It is! I haven't seen one since I last looked in a mirror! Get it 'cause--" a pink bundle of fur kept bouncing from behind the timid Fluttershy. This sudden burst in liveliness helped everpony in the room to regain their bearings.

Rainbow Dash grinned at them. "Hey, Fluttershy! Pinks, good to see you! What took you so long?"

"Good to see you too Dashie! I had to drag Fluttershy from her cottage when I told her you caught a changeling! I don't think she really likes to meet him...or her...or it!"

"...I'm sorry." Fluttershy whispered, pawing at the floor with her fore-hoof.

Shaking her head, Rarity suppressed a chuckle. "I assure you darling, it's no problem at all. We're just glad you made it to our...er...interrogation."

Fluttershy looked up, a hint of fear on her face. "That sounds awful! You're not torturing the poor thing are you? I mean...he's still a living thing, and um...eep!"

"Now you dun' worry 'bout a thing, Fluttershy. We ain't done no harm to this here changeling. In fact, I reckon it did more harm to itself." Applejack reassured.

Fluttershy visibly relaxed, but looked troubled up again. "Harm to itself? Oh my...what happened? I mean, if you want to tell me that is."

At this, Rainbow Dash burst out laughing. "Haha! That reminds me! It fell to the floor when--hehe--it shook it's head as an answer. Haha, you should have seen him Pinkie...Pinkie?" Rainbow Dash looked around the room and spotted the pink pony squinting her eyes at the unconscious Lance. "Hey Pinks, what are you doing?" Rainbow Dash flew over to Pinkie Pie, when she noticed the look on Pinkie's face. She looked like she was about to barrage them with words.

"You mean he fell crashed the chair from shaking too hard? What happened? That sounds like a really funny story, speaking of which I got a story! One time when Gummy and I visited the Cheerilee's class, everypony was so happy when I brought them cake, balloons, candy, other pastries, the party cannon, an elephant--" Rainbow Dash stuffed a hoof up Pinkie Pie's mouth. Pinkie Pie went on talking, oblivious that her speech was being hindered by a hoof. After she was done with her rant, Pinkie Pie spat out the hoof, then smiled sheepishly at Rainbow Dash.

"Wait--elephant?" Twilight cocked her eyebrow, looking expectantly at Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie merely shrugged then went bouncing off into a room.

Shaking her head, Rainbow Dash wiped her hoof absentmindedly. Rarity opened her mouth to retort something, but quickly decided against it when she noticed Lance stir. "Girls, I think that our guest is starting to wake."

Lance felt heavy, what happened? Oh right, he got teleported to his dad's dream world. 'What kind of sick joke is this?' Lance thought, struggling to get up. Sensing that his appendages were stiff, he opened his eyes then groaned. He was tied. To a chair. On the floor. Then it all came rushing back to him, he was a "Changeling", it was a dangerous species, as stated by his dad. Apparently they "fed on love", whatever that meant. The Changelings had a mother-like queen/mother made queen...And he was captured by the show's main protagonists whose "leader" got her sister-in-law impersonated by the Changeling Queen, "Chrysalis". Oh, and did I mention that he was a changeling? Joy.

Looking around as much as he can, Lance noticed that he was in a sort of library. Lance closed his eyes and tried to recall everything his dad taught him about the mystical land of...Equestria. There were six main characters, who have some sort of badass treasure that can pawn noobs in "10 seconds flat". They were named; *shudder* "Twilight Sparkle", "Rainbow Dash", "Rarity", "Pinkie Pie", "Applesack" and the lat one whose name Lance can't quite remember. Although he remembered something when he was a little kid, his parents were shouting something in the room and Lance could have sworn his father said something along the lines of: "Futashy". Pretty weird pony names.

Lance let out a sigh, OK then. He had recollected the basic info about the characters and now, with the world itself, there were three pony types; Unicorns with their magic, Pegasi with their wings, and Earth Ponies with their...um...earthiness? Well, Earth Ponies probably had it bad. Lance fancied that Earth Ponies could be the equivalent of the oppressed back in his world. There were also sentient dragons, kick-ass griffins, and some "normal" animals like rabbits and dogs.

Now, back to the matter at hand...WHY THE FUCK WAS HE IN EQUESTRIA? Lance took a quick breath then exhaled as quickly. This process repeated until the girls took notice.

"I think he's hyperventilating." Twilight Sparkle mused, looking over at Lance.

'Futashy' appeared to be worried and her aura reflected that. 'Oh right.' Lance thought, while continuing his breathing session 'Changelings can read emotion, that explains a lot...cool...if it weren't for the fact I'm in freakin' Equestria!!'

"Are you...OK, um, 'sir'?" the butter-yellow pegasus flew over to the spazzed out changeling on the floor. Lance kept on breathing, his pattern becoming erratic.

"Ah think we should do something 'bout this. Ah wouldn't want to see anypony dead, changeling or not." 'Applsack' stated, a pensive expression on her face.

Coming to a realization, Lance let out a whooping cough that sounded like a fart. A silence ensued before this brought out mixed reactions from the mares. Rarity looked flustered and disgusted then promptly turned around. 'Futashy' took a step back and hid half of her face (and snout) with her mane. Rainbow Dash took this as another opportunity to laugh her flank off. Pinkie Pie suddenly appeared seemingly out of nowhere and began to roll over, giggling like Dash. Twilight and 'Applesack' had blank expressions on their faces.

Twilight examined the now-stable changeling on the floor. "Are you--...are you alright, Lance?"

Pinkie Pie stopped laughing and turned to look at Twilight Sparkle "Did you just say Lance?"

Twilight nodded he head "It's what the changeling said it's name was."

The pink earth pony stared at Lance like he was some sort of zoo exhibit. He felt like one too, being restrained and gawked at does make you feel like an animal. Unsure of what to do next, Lance found himself returning the gaze, albeit awkwardly.

Those baby-blue eyes appear to scrutinize his Lance's very being soul. Not wanting to back off, Lance foolishly kept up the gaze. After a few intense moments of Lance's and Pinkie Pie's eyes meeting, Lance let out a little yelp. "Stop that!" Pinkie Pie kept on staring. Shuddering, Lance looked away at the last moment, not seeing the pony's features twist into a genuine smile.

"I think we can trust him girls! He seems nice to me!" the upbeat voice of the pink pony said, voice dripping with glee.

Twilight Sparkle did a double-take "We can?"

Lance looked back at the happiest pony in the room "Y-You can?"

"Yep!" she replied simply.

Lance was taken aback. "Thanks? I guess." Lance pondered for a moment, he never expected the ponies--well at least one of them--to trust him so quickly. But then again, this is a little girl's cartoon, of course they'll always be happy and kind and shit. Or so he thought, Twilight Sparkle didn't look too pleased with her friend's revelation of immediate trust.

Twilight cleared her throat "I think you're forgetting why we're here Lance."

"I think so too." Lance quipped.

Ignoring Lance's remark, Twilight continued. "I'm going to ask you one more time." Twilight lowered her head, pointing her horn at the grounded changeling. "Why are you here?" the horn fizzled with magenta energy, spaRks were flying everywhere.

Lance stared wide-eyed at the rapidly-growing sphere of energy atop Twilight's horn. 'Fucking shit! Why is this cunt so freaking violent? What the hell. man! She's just a purple unicorn!' Lance thought. Attempting to dissuade his mind from panicking, Lance cried out the first thing in his mind; "I already told you! I need help I'm not trying to invade or anything! I swear! I Pinkie-Promise!" Lance promptly shut his eyes and prepared for impact.

It never came though, an audible gasp was heard throughout the room, followed shortly by a sound reminiscent to a broken record. Deciding against his better judgement, Lance flipped his right eye open and was met by a pink face smiling widely at him.

'She must waiting for that weird-ass ritual...Ah, to hell with it, I need to do this...' Lance thought. Clearing his throat (which yet again sounded like a methane bomb being released), Lance said "Cross my heart, hope to fly...Stick a cupcake in my eye."

The remaining five ponies in the room looked shocked for a moment. Twilight Sparkle took a step forward "How did you what a Pinkie Promise is?" She looked absolutely puzzled. Lance thought the same thing, how did he know? Why, courtesy of his father of course! But, Lance couldn't say that to Twilight, it would probably stir up some more suspicion.

"Um..." Lance's eyes darted left and right, "...cause I'm a changeling?" he muttered feebly. Twilight stared at him incredulously, then proceeded to bash her face with her hoof.

"Oooh..that's so obvious..." Twilight groaned, face still buried by her fore-hoof. 'Applesack' cocked an eyebrow but said nothing.

Lance fidgeted against his binds once more, but to no avail. "Any more *cough* questions, Sparkle?" Lance croaked.

Twilight Sparkle looked up; her expression brightening. "Yes, actually!" Twilight stated happily. "OK," Twilight cleared her throat "How long were you situated here?"

"I just came by here." Lance replied.

Lance noticed Twilight nod while 'Applesack' merely frowned.

"You're strangely cooperative..." Twilight muttered under her breath; as she magicked a piece of parchment and began writing down with a quill.

Lance shrugged in response, or at least, the equivalent of one when you're strapped down on a chair. "Do you have any other questions?" Lance asked.

Twilight Sparkle shook her head as she set aside the parchment. "That's all for today, Lance."

Lance had a sudden thought, "What are you ponies going to do to me?"

Rainbow Dash flew over to Lance. As Rainbow Dash looked at Lance, she gave out a smirk. "We're just gonna keep 'ya here 'till you rot!"

'Futashy's' eyes widened "Eep!"

"Ugh, OK, until we figure out what to do with you." said Rainbow Dash. 'Futashy' let out a soft sigh upon hearing this.

Lance let out a sigh of his own, followed by a coughing fit. "I f-feel terrible!" Lance sputtered. The mares gave each other uneasy looks while Lance kept on coughing.

Without warning, 'Futashy' hugged Lance in a warm embrace. "You poor thing..." Lance was taken aback by this gesture so much, he stopped coughing. He could feel concern and pity from the pegasus. The seconds went on, and Lance was still in 'Futashy's' fore-arms. Lance could actually feel the energy drifting from the pony to himself. 'So this is how changelings eat...I never thought it would be this...un-perverted'

"HUGS! COUNT ME IN!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed in a shrill voice, before leaping and joining the embrace. If 'Futashy' was like a soft pillow, Pinkie Pie was that hard couch you can't sleep on no matter what position you take. Despite the "rough love" Pinkie Pie was emanating, Lance could still detect traces of pure joy. It tasted like sweets.

Lance hated hugs, but loved sweets. 'Damn paradox' Lance thought. Since he was  strapped down, he might as well enjoy the meal he was given (no innuendo intended).

Twilight Killjoy-Sparkle decided it was enough "Hey, Pinkie, Fluttershy; stop! You're giving him too much love!! He might--"

Lance took Twilight Sparkle's warning as the cue to break free. With renewed vigor, Lance's hooves broke the binds and consequently pushed the hugging ponies away. "Meanie!" Pinkie Pie cried, pointing an accusatory hoof at the now standing Lance. Lance made a bee-line for the library door, only to be stopped by an invisible wall. Lance crumpled to the floor, rubbing his snout.

Eyes darting left and right, Lance noticed he was surrounded on all sides by the mares. "Shit" Lance muttered.

"That was a bad move, Lance!" Rainbow Dash smirked, eager for action.

"I know." Lance quipped.

"Ya know, I thought you were a pretty chill po--changeling, but I'm gonna have to take you down since you tried to escape. Nothing personal,...precautions, as the egg head called it." retorted Rainbow Dash.

"Hey! I'm not an--"

"M'eh." Lance mumbled, leaning on the force field keeping him in the room. As Lance took in his current situation, he was sure he was fucked...if it weren't for the door bursting open, revealing a gray blur speeding through the doorway; effectively smashing the force-field.

"Delivery for Vinyl Scr--Hey wait...Rainbow? Why are you in Vinyl's hou--...*gasp!*" The newcomer flew over and stared wide-eyed (and wall-eyed) at Rainbow Dash. "I never thought the rumors were true, Rainbow! You are a filly-fooler!"

"Hey! I'm no fi--"

"Anyway where's Vinyl?"

"This isn't Vinyl's...this is Golden Oaks Library..." Twilight Sparkle deadpanned.

"Girls, I think we are forgetting something very important. Something important running out of the library in break-neck speed!" Rarity informed.

Rainbow Dash flared out her wings, "Tsk, I got it! That changeling's not gonna get away from the fastest flier in Equestria!"

The grey pegasus let out another gasp "Are you bisexual?!"

"What the--I am not bisexual, Derpy!"

"Um...Rainbow Dash... the, um changeling is pretty far away now...so maybe if you, um, stopped arguing...I mean, if that's ok with you?"

"Like I said, I got it! Even if that changeling manages one mile, I'll be there to take him...or her... or it...DOWN!" And with those words, Rainbow Dash flew over to chase down the run-away changeling.

Applejack went after Rainbow Dash, saying something along the lines of: "Ah better go too, wouldn't want Dash 'ere to mess up the town..."

"So...shouldn't we go after them? Chasing is actually a pretty fun thing to do! Oooh, now I want to chase them, it will just be like the first game my sisters and I played back in the rock farm. Speaking of sisters--" Pinkie Pie breathed, obviously about to proceed to a rant; when Twilight Sparkle stuffed a hoof in Pinkie Pie's mouth.

"Please Pinkie, we still have to redirect Ditzy Doo to Vinyl Scrath's residence."

Pinkie Pie spat out Twilight Sparkle's hoof, "Okie Doki Loki!"

"Wait, so, I'm not in Vinyl's?...I thought you mares were just having one, big org--"

"Eep!"

[08] Runaway Changeling

Runaway Changeling

Three fillies were dragging themselves dejectedly down a dirt path; a wagon with all sorts of knickknacks in tow. The afternoon sun beat down upon the travelling ponies; whose respective mouths were each agape with thirst. After a few moments of uneasy silence, the white unicorn filly was the first to speak out "I'm sorry about your scooter, Scootaloo...I should have been more careful."

The orange pegasus cracked a grin "Ah, it's OK, Sweetie Belle! It was my idea after all. And besides...that scooter was gonna break someday." Sweetie Belle beamed at her friend's reply; then proceeded to nod furiously. The earth pony of the group suddenly stopped.

"Uh, girls; what the hay is that?" the yellow earth pony asked her companions; pointing a hoof at a speeding black blur.

Scootaloo squinted her eyes at the dark mass zipping throughout Ponyville; evasively dodging obstacles. "I'm...uh not sure...it's kinda like Rainbow Dash though...but...not so rainbow."

Sweetie Belle turned to stare at her pegasus friend "...What?" The orange filly responded with a shrug.

"Don't mind what it looks like girls! Mind where it'sa headin'!" Applebloom cried.

The rest of the Cutie Mark Crusaders abruptly turned their heads...

...just in time to see that the blur had steered it's way into their general direction.

"G'ah!"

"Wha--!"

"Eek!"

"Dafuq?!"

Four varying sounds squeaked out from the jumbled mess known as the CMC and the "not-so-rainbow Rainbow Dash" As soon as the initial shock of being toppled over was over; the three fillies scrambled their hooves to a proper standing position. What lay before them was a creature that resembled a pony/insect hybrid. It was colored black all over, save for its eyes, which held a bluish hue. As the three dumbstruck ponies continued to gawk at the strange fellow, they noticed that the hybrid held the same calculating gaze as them. Nothing much happened until-...

"AAAAAH A CHANGELING!" Sweetie Belle shrieked.

Scootaloo turned to look at her friend "A what-now?"

"Ah heard about them strange critters from ma'h sis!" Applebloom interjected. "She says they were at the wedding one time!"

The orange pegasus turned to look at her companions. The two crusaders beside her started quivering as the Changeling stood up to look at them. The fillies could only watch as the creature's head turned to look at them. The Changeling suddenly frowned.

"Not you three!" it groaned.

"We're really sorry for getting in your way Mr. Changeling sir...m'am..." Sweetie Belle stammered.

"Uh, yeah!" Applebloom interjected "We, uh, we were just gonna go back to town...and we'll forget we ever saw 'yah."

The Changeling gave out a grunt. As the black creature turned; a scooter suddenly sailed the air, landing perfectly on the Changeling's head!

"Goddamit!" the Changeling hissed. Turning back to the Crusaders, the creature spotted the orange pegasus with a determined look on her face.

Scootaloo inhaled; then shouted out "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: CHANGELING CATCHERS!!"

"Yay..." the two fillies next to her shouted, but without much enthusiasm.

Rubbing it's head; the Changeling proceeded to take out the scooter thrown at it. "Seriously?" it mocked "A scooter? Is that all you--"

CRASH!!

A huge pile of assorted debris found itself on top of a taken-aback Changeling. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo beamed at their earth-pony friend, who had apparently been the one to fling the wagon at the creature.

"That was awesome Applebloom!" cried Scotaloo; while jumping up and down excitedly.

"Yeah! Who knew you had it in you to throw that heavy thing on your own!" Sweetie Belle chimed in.

Applebloom blushed "Aw shucks, ah am an earth pony after all..."

A groan from underneath the pile of items captured the three fillies' attention.

"So, uh, what are we gonna do with it?" Scootaloo asked.

A burst of colors suddenly streaked across the sky. "I'll take it from here!" a cyan pegasus declared; while speeding down to the ground.

"Rainbow Dash!!" Scootaloo shouted just as the aforementioned pegasus' hooves touched the ground. "Thank Celestia you're here!"

The cyan pegasus grinned "Not to worry, I'm here to take out the not-so-adorable trash!"

"Confound these ponies; they drive me to get pissed off!" the Changeling snarled, causing the three fillies to jump.The black creature wiggled it's glimmering body in an awkward attempt to free itself from the pile. No such luck. "Um..." the Changeling started "...a little help? Hehehe..."

Rainbow Dash quirked an eyebrow "...and why the hay should I do that?" The athlete asked, while looking down at the captured Changeling. The question hung around the Changeling's mind like a nasty odor. After a few seconds of nothing happening; the Changeling twitched violently.

"Fuck this..." The Changeling mumbled. It's horn flashed green for a moment, too quick for even Rainbow Dash to spot. After a brief moment of wiggling through the debris, everything just--exploded. Unidentifiable scraps of wood and metal threw themselves around like a firework; showering four ponies in a rain of things.

Rainbow Dash's eyes widened for a second before she hurriedly scooped up the three gaping fillies in her hooves. "We gotta get out of this--!" the mare cried; swiftly avoiding a chunk of scooter that would have crashed onto her. Rainbow Dash took off to the skies to take a look at the surroundings. As she did; she noticed a black blur speeding towards the opposite direction. 'Darn.' the pegasus thought 'It's getting away...'

Mentally scolding herself, Rainbow Dash sped to the outskirts of Ponyville. As the mare was within range; she immediately set the three friends squirming against her grip to the ground. Well, two of them at least. "Let go of me squirt! I have to take that guy down!" Rainbow Dash glared at the orange filly grasping her front hoof.

"Nu Uh, I'm going with you!" Scotaloo cried defiantly.

Sighing, Rainbow Dash flared her wings, and for a brief moment, Scootaloo's eyes held a spark of hope. "No can do Scoots, it's too dangerous for a little filly." As the orange pegasus' mouth opened to give a response; Rainbow Dash quickly hovered two foot off the ground then began to perform twists and turns in the air.

A few seconds later, an orange bundle of fur fell onto two similar bundles of fur. "Kayhavetogobye!" The cyan pegasus said as she flew off after the runaway Changeling.

"I'm gonna get you, you creep."