Welcome to... Equestria?

by Chocovich

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Human
Length: 2501

Two bronies, and their pets, are brought to Equestria by Celestia herself, but is it the Equestria they know and love?

It was an average day on Earth, nothing out of the ordinary. Until of course, a strange thunderstorm sweeps across North America, somehow teleporting two bronies to a strange version of Equestria. Now that they're here the two of them are going to either find a way back, or find a way to get used to this strange Equestrian lifestyle.

[Anthro ponies and HiE | You've been warned]

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-11 13:20:01 UTC

Chapter 1: Storm of the Century

Chapter 1: Storm of the Century

Being woken up by my cat scratching across my face as the loudest crack of thunder went past not only managed to scare the ever living crap out of me, but it also freaked me out. Ever since I had gotten home from school today it's been storming like crazy, getting worse and worse by the hour. People across the world were claiming it was the end, but everyone else just said it was just one really bad storm. Thankfully though, my power had managed to stay on through it, so I quickly leaned over to my laptop and opened up Skype.

Andrew: Hey, your internet still up?

Dasha: Yup, still storming over there?

Andrew: If I said no I would definitely be lying. Pumpkin just scratched my face up because of the thunder

Dasha: Pound's freaking out too, he almost broke my desk trying to find a place to hide.

Andrew: Well, since we still have power and internet, want to get a call going?

Dasha: Sure, just give me a second

Moments later the call window popped up, a disgruntled looking Rainbow Dash picture staring at you while you checked that everything was working right. Microphone plugged in, headphones working fine, and Pumpkin, my kitten, was trying to hide under my shirt. In other words, everything was fine.

"Hey," Dasha said, trying to see if the call was actually working or not because you hadn't said anything yet.

"I'm here, I'm here," I replied as I struggled to get Pumpkin out of my shirt because her claws were digging into my chest, "How are things down there?" As I asked that I heard a loud crack through my headphones, making me worry. It didn't sound like normal thunder, and there was a strange sizzling noise coming through Skype. A few seconds later the call ended, only making me even more worried. What if lightning had struck her house, or a hurricane had formed, carrying her away? Countless thoughts ran through my head, until I heard a similar crack, and then saw white.

"What the...?" I mumbled as I looked around, trying to see something other than white, but that's all there was. Nothing but white. I moved my arm in front of your face, but all that went past was a small shadow. Was I dead and in limbo? I couldn't really tell, considering there was nothing but white. White, white, white. That's all there was, and it was already making me crazy.

"So much white!" I said in a crazy tone, "Why is there nothing but white?!" Before I could look to see more white I felt myself hit something really hard. Hard enough to knock me out completely at least.

"Wake up!"

*Shake*

"Wake up dammit!"

*Shake*

"Oh just wake the f- up!"

*SMACK*

"What the fuck?!" I shouted as my body instinctively shot upright, my entire body suddenly shooting with pain, "What the hell just happened?!" Looking around suddenly I saw grass, trees, the cat, and...

"Dasha?" I stuttered out, my mind lurching to try and find out why in the world she was sitting right next to me, her hand a little bit red, "Why are we in a field, with Pound and Pumpkin?" Dasha stayed silent for a moment as I stared at her, expecting her to have an answer for whatever reason. Turning my head slightly you saw Pound and Pumpkin rolling around together in the grass, the two of them getting along surprisingly well.

"Dashie?" I asked, hoping to get a response out of her this time around, "Is everything okay?"

"You, uh... don't have a shirt on," Dasha said, trying not to laugh as the two animals quickly realized that I were up, both of them running over and knocking me to the ground again, their tiny claws digging into my chest.

"GAH! THE PAIN!" I shouted as your tried to get away from the pets, but their claws allowed them to latch on, my movements only making things more painful. While I writhed in pain Dasha just laughed at me, not doing a single thing to save me from the animal onslaught. When I finally managed to get them off of me she stopped laughing, her cheeks red and her eyes watery from laughing so hard.

"You're so evil..." I said quietly, my chest burning from a thousand scratches thanks to the cat and dog. When I looked around I saw the two animals playing with each other a few feet away, neither of them making a move as I looked at them. When I looked around I saw my shirt hanging loosely from a tree, and in surprisingly good shape too, despite it landing in a tree from who knows how many feet in the sky. As I got to the bottom of the tree I saw that it'd be a bit of a climb if I wanted to get it down, so with a deep breath I got ready to climb.

"Surprise!" Dasha shouted as she came up and smacked my back, the pain causing my muscles to lock up, ending with my face flying into the tree. Jumping up to my feet I turned around to see her laughing her ass off at my pain, again.

"I have one question for you," I said, breathing in for emphasis, "WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!"

"Because I can," Dasha said simply, giving you a really sweet smile as she tried to hold in another laugh.

"You're evil..." I sighed as I turned around, looking for an appropriate place to start climbing up the tree. Once I'd found a good foothold I started climbing, quickly finding myself sitting on the branch that my shirt was hanging off of. Slowly inching forwards I managed to get halfway across before I heard the one sound I didn't want to hear.

*Crrrrrrrrrack!*

"SHIT!" I shouted as me, my shirt, and the branch went flying to the ground. I landed first, the branch landing flat across my back, and my shirt gently floated down, covering my head when it finally landed.

"You should be a comedian!" Dasha laughed as she held her sides, hurting from how much she'd been laughing in the last little bit.

"Shut up..." I grunted angrily, nearly at the end of my rope with everything. First the animals, then the smack, and now I've fallen out of a tree. What else could possibly go wrong? As you got up you heard a loud crack from somewhere above you, and as you prepared for white everywhere, things suddenly went black.

"I GOT 'IM!" someone shouted from on top of you, the voice sounding awfully familar, but it definitely was't Dasha. As I opened my eyes the world started to spin, or at least, what little bit of the world you could see, because two round objects were being pressed against your face. Odd thing is, they didn't hurt, actually, they were really soft, yet firm...

"Get your butt off his face!" Dasha yelled as she ran over, doing what she could to get the strange objects off of you. With a mighty push from her the objects were lifted off, revealing themselves to be someone's bountiful booty. As I examined my twin attackers I noticed what looked like an apple poking out from under their tight denim covers. After almost a minute of staring you had gotten a well earned smack from Dasha, who was feeling a mixture of surprise, and anger.

"Who are you?" I asked, still not noticing what the big deal was until whoever sat on my face moved out of the sunlight, the issue becoming extremely apparent once they did. It was a tall, curvy woman, with...

...pony ears and orange fur?!

"Why, Ah'm Applejack, who else would Ah be?" she asked, looking at you like you were insane, until she noticed that neither you, nor Dasha, had any fur at all. Within an instant her face contorted into a look of complete confusion, and a moment later the rest of the mane six burst through the tree line, all of them looking like a mixture of human and pony. So this is what a real anthro pony looks like..., I thought as I scanned all of them, my eyes unintentionally staying for a bit longer on Pinkie and Applejack's plentiful busts. With a look over to Dasha I could tell she was thinking the exact same thing, without the focus on chests that I unintentionally had.

"TWILIGHT!" Applejack yelled suddenly, making everyone freeze on the spot, "WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS?!" Feeling an urge to stand up and defend yourself along with Dasha, but you were too busy trying to figure out what was going on. Although, Dasha didn't want to think about it as much as you, and didn't quite like being called a thing, so in a moment she jumped up, getting ready to fight,

"Wanna call me a thing again little miss?!" Dasha shouted, causing Rainbow Dash to fly up in her face, threatening a fight, but me and Pinkie were just a quick to jump between then.

"Dashie stop!" the two of us shouted as we held our respective Dashies back, both of them trying to get us out of the way so they could beat the lights out of one another. In less than a minute the other five quickly split up their man, or woman, power to help pull the two of them apart. With more than a little trouble we managed to get them apart, with the girls running over to calm Rainbow down while you talked with Dasha. Kneeling down next to her I began to talk, trying to act as much like a psychiatrist as I could.

"What's troubling you?" I asked, surprising myself with how disconnected it sounded once I had actually said it, "I mean, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine dude," Dasha said, being stubborn, "But she didn't have to jump in my face all of a sudden"

"That's Rainbow Dash, and you were shouting at Applejack," I said, pointing out rather obvious facts that she should know by now, "She's all about loyalty, remember?"

"THAT'S NOT RAINBOW DASH!" Dasha shouted, making the group of pony-humans look over with confused looks. They quickly huddled back up before Twilight started to walk over, and so I stood to greet her. When she got right in front of you it became apparent that she wasn't very tall, probably around 5'5, but she did look like a bookworm. Khaki's, flats, a dress shirt with rolled up sleeves, and a sweater vest to boot. She was literally the text book example of a nerd, all she needed was a pocket protector and she'd be set.

"So, what are you two?" Twilight asked, her intellectual mind making her want to find out everything she possible could, "Some kind of furless pony or ape?" Hearing Dasha make a small movement to get up I quickly stepped in the way, wanting to prevent another conflict, even though I knew Twilight would easily win without moving a muscle. One of the benefits of having unimaginable magical powers, no one wanted to mess with you, and Twilight was one such person, or pony.

"Well, we're humans, which are kinda like apes, but, well..." I slowly stuttered off, not sure how to say that we were from another universe where they are all just ponies and characters on a girls TV show that a bunch of adults watch like a cult. While I thought about it Rainbow came stomping over, having heard the connection to apes that I had made.

"So they're a pair of hairless apes, makes sense considering they're so brutish!" Rainbow said, her voice getting steadily louder as she went on, "I wonder how these hairless apes found their way all the way into the Whitetail Woods?!" The sudden hostility towards me and Dasha caught both of us off guard. Before she was just standing up for her friends, but now she was just being evil. Because of instinct my body moved to through Rainbow to the ground, but Dasha stepped up, pulling me back when I was just in front of Rainbow, my arm mere inches from her throat.

"Ok, everyone calm down!" Twilight shouted, her loud voice snapped everyone back to common sense. Both me and Rainbow opened out eyes as wide as we could, staring at each other in confusion for a moment until we realized what was going on.

"Sorry," the two of us said to each other, both of us feeling very ashamed of how we had acted. The others rolled their eyes before me and Dasha realized that our two pets were missing, both of us quickly running around shouting our pets names at the top our lungs. We started to worry that our pets had run away, but from the edge of the clearing we heard Fluttershy speak up, just barely loud enough for us to hear.

"Um... They're over here..." Fluttershy said quietly, both Pumpkin and Pound happily running around her while she watched them. We quickly ran over and picked up our animals, the two of them happily climbing into our arms as we hugged them close.

"So, would you care to explain how you two go here?" Applejack asked, her arms crossed in front her chest, which seemed to be an amazing feat considering she had some large knockers. How she got her arms underneath them, I had no idea, but then again, Pinkie seemed to be able to do the same, so it was probably just a thing they figure out as they get bigger.

"Well, we actually don't know..." I answered honestly, "We don't even know how to get back to where we're from"

"How is that possible?" Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow because she found it hard to believe.

"Well, uh, we don't even know that bit either," Dasha said, shrugging. The six girls all looked between each other worriedly. They all walked away to talk for a few minutes, leaving me, Dasha, and our pets alone. After a little while they came back, Twilight taking the lead for the group.

"Since we don't know what to do with you two, and we can't just leave you out here, you're coming with us," Twilight said, sounding a bit nervous, "I'm going to write to Princess Celestia while Applejack takes you to the farm" Me and Dasha shrugged and it was settled. Celestia was going to know we were here, and we would be working on Sweet Apple Acres. It would mean a bit of work, but it didn't matter, it was going to be fun working there with Applejack and Big Mac, some of our favorite ponies.

"Well, let's get going then!" Applejack said, announcing that it was time to get going.