Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, to our program Radio New Vegas. This is your host, Mr. New Vegas, with the daily news. But first, a recap on the many major events from this past month, for those of you who might've been living under rocks this whole time, er, no offense, Vault Dwellers. So listen closely, my audience, because these are events that will go down in the new, non-burnt history books of the world, with the key term being: NCR.
It turns out that all that commotion over at Hoover Dam sparked a whole lotta change in various places and factions within our humble desert. The NCR dealt a decisive blow against Caesar's Legion at the Second Battle of Hoover Dam with the help of six powerful allies, one and a half robots, and surprisingly, the Enclave and the Brotherhood of Steel, but that's a whole different story for another time. The NCR and its heavily armed and armored benefactors succeeded in driving the Legion back to their capital and giving the Mojave some much needed space to grow, which was somewhat hard to accomplish with all the legionnaires breathing down our necks. Hopefully since Caesar took two .44 rounds in the skull from an unknown assassin and Legate Lanius was defeated by our brave allies, the Legion may finally take the hint and disband for good. I wouldn't get my hopes up too soon, folks, but I'm sure something will work out just as it has in the past.
NCR relations with other influential powers have been gradually improving. But listen to this, folks: after fighting alongside each other at the Dam, the NCR and the Brotherhood of Steel decided to throw all caution to the wind and put aside their admittedly numerous differences for the benefit of both sides in a mutual alliance; a shaky one at that, but an alliance nevertheless. In exchange for the NCR heavy troopers' salvaged power armor, the Brotherhood has promised to help patrol the Long 15. Rest easy, caravaneers, you've got walking fortresses with giant gatling lasers watching your backs.
In other related news, the temporary truce between the Kings and the NCR has blossomed into a full-scale relief effort for the people. Now we can expect Freeside to become a much safer place in the near future, what with well-equipped, armed, and trained military troopers, and gang members with nice haircuts watching over it. Freeside will finally be able to live up to its name.
The Great Khans are no more, folks. Yes, that's right. The tough, resilient, hard-as-nails group of tribals who sided with Caesar's Legion just disappeared. That's right folks, poof! Without a word. And they aren't just any group. Due to their brutal initiation rituals and rigorous training, they do *not*, by any means, go down easily. Is it some kind of coincidence that they disappeared right before the Second Battle for Hoover Dam? 'Cuz there's something fishy about this, and it ain't Lakelurks. Here are two of the most plausible, but still unconfirmed, reports. Some say the NCR sent Veteran Rangers, the absolute best the NCR has to offer, to Red Rock Canyon to use force to get them to leave. Others say that an individual was sent to talk them into leaving. Either way, anyone or anything that can just up and deal with the gang that has been harassing the Wasteland for so long is truly a force to be reckoned with. Or is just the most suave talker ever to walk the barren earth.
After helping the Great NCR Bear recover from the damage it sustained during the Second Battle for Hoover Dam, the Followers of the Apocalypse were allowed to keep their headquarters- the Old Mormon Fort. You may be thinking, "Keep? I thought the Old Mormon Fort was theirs in the first place." Well, I'll get to that in a bit, folks. But for now, let's just be grateful that the most knowledgeable and experienced healers in the entire Wasteland are still with us.
If you thought that accepting change is difficult, wait until you hear about this. Ever heard of the Boomers? Well, for those of you who don't know, the Boomers are xenophobic tribals armed with even more firepower than the Gun Runners. No one ventures in or out of their heavily guarded lands, for fear of getting blown to pieces. Until recently.
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All in all, the future's looking bright for you, my beloved Wasteland Dwellers. So bright, in fact, that it almost surpasses your overall brilliance. Almost. But then again, you good people deserve nothing less.
But I'm betting my caps that you're all tired of listening to me run my yapper, so here's to the tunes you all have most likely been waiting this whole time for.
