In which Clayton becomes a Pilgrim.
There was a knocking at my door. Every bang at that door felt like a kick to the head.
I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. The effects of last night were starting to kick like an apple farmer. My stomach felt like it was boiling over a stew, my throat was drier than a desert, and my head felt like it was getting crushed between rocks. That knocking came again and again more pain in my head.
From behind the door, a mare shouted, "Are you in there, Mister Clayton?"
I forced myself to sit up straight, knocking over some empty bottles of applebrandy and a couple of betting tickets. I suddenly recalled the events of last night in good clarity then. I was drinking, drinking a lot. Someone, the identity eludes me, made a few bets with me. I lost. Judging by the fact that there were several other tickets on the desk along with the others I knocked over, I must have lost a lot of times. Then I spied a note on my desk, hastily written but written as if there was lot of anger behind it.
YOU'RE 10,000 BITS SHORT
Yeah, I really must have lost a lot of times. How the heck was I going to pay this off? I wasn't exactly swimming in bits at the moment. Did I even live here?
I looked around. It truly felt like someone had stolen one of my kidneys. Nothing in this single room but the desk, the chair I fell asleep in, a trunk full of spare clothes, and the mattress. The wallpaper was peeling away, the floorboards were rotting and festering, and even the door didn't look much better. This place felt more at home for hobos, thieves, or batponies. The absolute worst place to raise a family or even to just sleep in.
Yep, I definitely lived here.
That knocking came again. My head felt like it was going to burst. Summoning all my hungover strength, I shouted at them. "What do you want!?"
I knew exactly what they wanted of course. They wanted money. If I couldn't pay, they would probably take my bed or something, or the desk, or maybe something in my trunk. Then again, ten-thousand bits wasn't anything to shake a stick at. The response however, surprised me.
"We can wipe away your debt, Mister Clayton!"
DREAM VALLEY
I really feel like I should be questioning why I'm getting soaked in the rain on a rowboat in the middle of the ocean while the two other occupants of this boat argue about the most meaningless things ever. I could have just not got on the boat in the first place now that I think about it. But you know, there's a time to complain and that's when it feels like the universe is out to get you at every turn and every corner. It would really be terrible if every time you succeed, some idiot moves the goalposts down the field and says you didn't. That's the kind of stuff you can complain about. At least, legitimately complain about.
Why am I not complaining? Because I dug myself into this hole, so to speak. I gambled. Now I owe a debt to people that you do not want to owe debts to. I consider myself a cautious stallion. Indeed, unicorns are known for being cautious around everyone that isn't a unicorn. That goes out the window the instant that first drop of applebrandy goes down your throat. I drink too which is probably worse than the gambling. Mixing gambling and alcohol is like trying to put out a fire with fireworks. I was lucky they didn't steal one of my kidneys.
And now I'm here. In the ocean between Equestria and Gryphonia. The deal was simple, "Bring us the girl and wipe away the debt". The details eluded me. I'm sure the details didn't matter though. What's done is done, and what's done will be done. I only really wondered what use they had for some mare. Maybe it was family or friends, or perhaps someone they can toy with. I really could care less. As long as the debt was paid and I don't end up dead, I was all for it.
"You know," said one of the mares. This mare was rowing the boat alone, grunting in exertion with each stroke. Beneath that bright yellow raincoat and rainhat were a warm straight cut red mane and a brilliant white coat. She continued on saying, "I'd greatly appreciate it if you would assist in the rowing."
The other mare, wearing similar rain attire responded with, "I built the boat, Miss Rosetta. I'm sure you can row it on your own. Especially since I see you rowing it as all the stallions in town shout your name as you drift by." This mare had a blonde mane with a similar white coat as Miss Rosetta. They must be related or something.
"Are you still bitter about that?"
"Perhaps I am. You always get the attention for rowing the boat that I built while all the colts and stallions practically worship you."
"Well perhaps you should have been more involved with the boat. You can't just build a boat then not use it. That's like building a house and deciding not to live in it."
"Well, why do you even row the boat anyway?"
"Because I happen to like this boat, Miss Iris. I like rowing it, it's wonderful in the summers and it's a very wonderful exercise."
"And yet you don't mind all the stallions who gather by the shore and catcall you."
"Not really, they all know I'm married anyway."
I should remind you of how utterly monotonous this is. I spent at least two hours listening to them prattle on about things mares talked about. I bet they were nice and dry underneath their raincoats and rainhats while I had sit out here and get drenched. Combined with the fact that we were in the middle of the rain while the waves were rocking us like a chair, I felt about ready to just jump in the ocean and drown. Being rational however, I didn't.
"Excuse me," I tried getting their attention. The blonde mare known as Miss Iris looked back at me, as did Miss Rosetta. Even beneath that shadowy hat, I could tell exactly why the stallions were up in hooves over Rosetta and possibly Iris. They looked stunning. I cleared my throat which allowed me some time to clear up my suddenly twisted tongue, then I asked, "How much longer?"
Iris shrugged. "Shan't be too long." Iris's blue-green eyes widened for the briefest of seconds, then she reached under her seat and pulled out a box. It was a very simple wooden box, but I spied something that made this box very special. It was a gold labeling on the center of the cover.
LANCE CORPORAL CLAYTON
HER MAJESTY'S ROYAL GUARD
Yep, my name is Clayton. I was part of the Royal Guard. Now that that's out of the way, we can get back to this. I took the box gingerly and opened it up. The first thing that caught my attention was the pistol. I knew what guns were, all Guardsponies did. We were trained in their use in case the griffons ever decided to cross the pond. Being a unicorn, I could use them with a simple magic grip. This particular pistol was a simple revolver in all its faded metal and six shot cylindrical glory. I pulled the cylinder out, and sure enough it was indeed loaded with .22 Caliber. Now that I think about it, I remember a friend of mine in the guard who tried designing a gun that ponies could use. He wound up accidentally wounding another guard because he didn't include a trigger guard.
I put the revolver back in the box. That'll be good for emergencies definitely. There were another few things in the box as well. There was a large skeleton key of some kind. On the bottom of the cover was a picture, depicting a sort of brass statue of a rearing alicorn which was labelled, "The Alicorn". I took the picture out and turned it over. Some really hasty writing on there. "You'll find the girl there" it said. There was also a photograph of what I assumed to be the mare I was looking for. A lavender unicorn, probably younger than me. Couldn't make out too many details, but she was recognizable enough, especially with that starburst cutie mark. I spent a full minute looking at that cutie mark before realizing I was just admiring the area around it, then I turned the photo over. "Bring to Canterlot unharmed." At least my employers were specific. Lastly, there was at least five bits inside. Five bits closer to paying off that debt, for it's worth.
I closed the box, and right around there my eyes were being blinded by something. Out there in the foggy, rain soaking ocean was some kind of bright light. I have to give you some perspective here, we're in the middle of the ocean between Gryphonia and Equestria. For all I knew, this could've been a freighter or perhaps an airship flying low to dodge the clouds. I was wrong, because as we got closer there was a definite shape of a tower, and at the top was that light. It was a lighthouse on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Gotta say, I'm no marine or anything but I don't think there was anything to collide with two-hundred miles from the nearest coast.
I heard Rosetta again. "You know, I would still appreciate it if you would help me row, Miss Iris."
Iris simply sat there, looking at her hooves pensively. "Perhaps you should ask the stallion, Miss Rosetta."
"I would if we could cease this rowing."
"Cease this rowing?"
"No, cease this rowing."
"Ah. I see what you mean."
I didn't.
The boat pulled up to some stairs coming out of the sea and up to the base of the lighthouse. Iris stated, "We've arrived." Well, obviously. I don't imagine we'd stop at a ghost lighthouse for a coffee run. I took the box and stuffed it into a worn satchel I brought with me. Although I wasn't eager to part the company of two lovely mares, especially one who was single, I was at least eager to get away from their conversations. I stepped off and onto the stairs.
Rosetta pushed the boat off away from the lighthouse. "Right, best of luck to you then, Mister Clayton."
"Indeed, try not to die or anything."
"That's quite blunt of you, Miss Iris."
"Well, what should I say then? Just try not to get killed?"
"I'm sure he'll develop feet of clay if we just tell him he might wind up a skeleton."
As they slowly rowed away, I decided to look at this lighthouse in better detail. And what detail it was. It was octagonal, probably seven stories, and I immediately noticed the light wasn't the most conventional light you'd see on a lighthouse. Rather say a gigantic torch, it was actually a gigantic lightbulb which shined in every direction, completely exposed to the elements. The walls were also polished and clean, as if it was just built yesterday. It probably was because I don't remember there being random lighthouses scattered around everywhere.
I stepped up the marble stairs. Marble, just more evidence that this thing didn't belong here. I eventually came up to a door. Wooden, simple, very unlike the rest of the lighthouse. What caught my attention more however was the note nailed to it.
CLAY
BRING US THE GIRL AND WIPE AWAY THE DEBT
THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE!!!
Multiple exclamation points. I'm so scared.
I gently pushed the door open, and it creaked loudly as if it hadn't been opened in years. As I stepped inside, it looked like nopony's even been in here for years either. It was darker than a batpony's heart in the lighthouse, I could barely see anything. Then, as I cleared the door, it shut with an immense bang. I nearly jumped in surprise, not fright, surprise. I grit my teeth and lit a light with my horn.
Now, one of things you learn being on the Royal Guard is how to operate a lighthouse. Why? Because lighthouses are instrumental to navigation in stormy weather where visibility becomes such that you become legally blind if you stick your head out a window. Rogue storms are actually quite frequent around Equestria, and in case of emergencies there is a network of over dozen lighthouses built inland for the pegasi's safety. Before actually becoming a guard, every trainee spends a week manning one of these lighthouses. Boring, but necessary work. One thing we definitely hated was the spiraling staircases going up because if we tripped we'd end up going flank over hoof all the way to the bottom.
Indeed, what really unnerved me wasn't the fact that there wasn't a spiral staircase going up. It was the fact that there was a spiral staircase, it was just going down. Down into some kind of basement or lower area, maybe under the sea or something. I swallowed hard, then slowly and steadily I walked down the stairs. The only source of illumination was from my horn. Wasn't the best torch as I could only see about a couple of feet in front of me, but it was better than nothing. Certainly better than just mucking around in the dark like a batpony. I have to admit however, every clang that's caused by me stepping on one of these metal stairsteps was raising hairs and I was sure that something was gonna burst out of the darkness and eat me.
Thankfully, there wasn't. After two full revolutions on the stairs, I made it to a more comfortable wooden floor. I will admit this, the one thing I'm probably most afraid of is heights, and going down those stairs not knowing where the bottom was was kind of stressful. The walls here were clearly stone, and there was a distinct smell of moss in the air. Probably a leak or something. That's what you get for building a lighthouse like this I suppose. I stepped towards what I assumed to be the center, and immediately found myself face to face with something.
It was a rusty metal pod, big enough to fit a couple of ponies or a single panda. The door leading inside it was open and thus I peered inside. Cloth seating, a deactivated light on the ceiling, a lever opposite the door, it all seemed innocent enough.
"This must be how employers expect me to get there," I said to no one in particular. One thing I learned, talking to yourself was a great way to stave off fear and loneliness. I guess that's why most people who talk to themselves are insane too.
I stepped inside, and the immediate thing was that I suddenly felt like I was on an elevator. That feeling of being on something hanging in the middle of a pit, and I have to say that I dread elevators. Always did. I took the towel and began drying myself off, then I took the note up and read it aloud to myself.
Clay, do not do anything fancy. Bring us the girl and wipe away the debt. Do not allow your presence to be known to anyone who looks important. Whatever you do, do not pick #23.
- Rosetta
Wait. The mare on the boat? I thought about for a minute, and I chalked it up to just her working for the guys I was indebted to. Then again, this was particularly cryptic. Why shouldn't I pick #23? Seems like a lucky number, at least in comparison to seventy-seven or three. I placed the note on the seat and I sat down next to the lever.
So this was it. The deciding moment. Well, not really a deciding moment. I really had to go through with this. It was either sit in this fancy pod, find some girl I've never met, and take her to some very unscrupulous people, or don't then get lamed by a bunch of griffons in an alleyway. What choice did I have?
Sometimes in life, you just don't get a choice it seems.
I pulled the lever down. The door immediately snapped shut. I tensed up as the pod suddenly felt like it was about to fall. That's just what it did. The pod began descending at slow pace, and soon I was now alone. The basement in the lighthouse was replaced with an ascending wall of rocks and stone. Now, the pod's single light lit up and I was able to give my horn a rest. I took a deep breath and waited. It's an interesting experience seeing that you're going down in what could potentially be a metal coffin. I wouldn't recommend it though. Then the pod began speeding up.
I leaned back into the seat, gritting my teeth. The pod rumbled and shook as it roared down the shaft. I felt like I was actually falling, which would be really bad if I was because then the First Law of Motion would make paste out of me when we hit the bottom. I just noticed there was a sign above the door. It appeared to be magic of some kind because the sign was measuring how deep I was going in real time. I had already passed three klicks, or kilometers in civilian terms. I really was going fast. I realized that I actually might die if this thing were to fail to slow down. I wondered how long this thing went on for.
About five minutes later when the sign reached ten klicks, the pod finally began slowing down. Suddenly, a projection screen lowered down from the ceiling, obscuring the window. A beam of light came in from opposite the screen, projecting a square of white. I then realized it was a film projector. Sometimes you're just slow to realize things I suppose.
An image came on the screen. It was an image of a unicorn on a cliff, looking over a city far into the distance. Her coat was orange and her mane was a fiery mix of red and yellow. No cutie mark, strangely enough. On the bottom of this image were the words, "The words of Princess Sunset Shimmer."
A feminine voice, confident and intelligent sounding, came from a hidden speaker in the pod and said, "Welcome, Pilgrim. I am Princess Sunset Shimmer. I congratulate you for undertaking this great journey."
The image stayed, but I could just tell that there was more this mare had to say.
"Let me ask you a question, Pilgrim. Is a person not entitled to be more? Are we not entitled to be able to become more than just merely a stamp on our flank? Are we to just lay down our lives in the name of a 'special talent' or a destiny in life just because someone said so? Will we just go to our graves like beds, unfulfilled, not knowing we could become more than just a simple farmer or a carpenter or a musician?
"I am here to answer that question. I rejected that promise, the promise of a so called 'fulfilled' life doing what a stamp told me and forever going about my life knowing I can be more than just that. With our blood, sweat, and tears, we can be more than just that. We can become more than ponies in Equestria serving underneath some pitiable alicorn with delusions of grandeur. We can become much, much, more, Pilgrim.
"And so I welcome you, Pilgrim, to our herd and to this new land. A land where you may become whomever you want to be. Where you will not be constrained by a stamp or a defined destiny. Where great thinkers and noble people are made rather than born. Where the gods are such because they made themselves so."
The screen retracted upwards. I was blinded by the sudden influx of light.
Quietly, Sunset said, "I welcome you, to Dream Valley."
As my eyes settled to this new light, I saw before me a city. I could barely make words for it. There was a sky, a great blue sky complete with clouds and a sun. Four great huge columns jutted up from each corner of the city and up up into sky. They were smooth, round, almost metallic looking in shape with chain-like grooves ascending down to their base. The city itself as well was huge, definitely bigger than Manehattan or Canterlot with skyscrapers and other huge buildings. The great rearing alicorn towered over the city as if it were a watchful protector.
An airship obscured my view of the city as it drifted by with two wings of propellers. On the side was a poster, a giant portrait of Sunset Shimmer. Below this portrait were the words, "OUR PRINCESS SUNSET SHIMMER". A troop of pegasi flew by as well, towing flags celebrating "FOUNDING DAY" and "OUR HARD WORK FAILS NOT TO REWARD US".
For the longest time as I descended down into this city, I didn't think I was nearly ten klicks underground or as the sign read a full thirty klicks. I couldn't even think of anything else. I'm sure my jaw was hanging open like an ajar door. It was the most magnificent thing I had ever laid my eyes on. I thought I had entered some kind of heaven. The pod rumbled to a stop, then began descending down into new darkness.
In which Clayton gets a lesson on self-determination
***
I contemplated the circumstances as I descended downwards. I've come to a huge city with skyscrapers, blue skies, airships, clouds, pegasi, giant statue, big lake of water, all of that stuff. All of this thirty klicks underground.
So many things ran through my head at this moment. How did they did all this? How many people live here? Is it some kind of utopia or dystopia? Is Sunset Shimmer all that she appears to be? Who is Sunset Shimmer? What do these people even eat? Maybe they just found a really big cave. Perhaps it's about a couple of hundred to a few thousand people. Maybe there's some kind of dark secret beyond that bright landscape. Perhaps Sunset Shimmer is actually a benevolent ruler of ponies along the lines of Princess Celestia. All kinds of questions and all kinds of theories.
This would definitely be a good time for some apple brandy.
As I descended deeper into this darkness, a light came in from a tall ornately decorated window. I could still see the city, shining gloriously in the distance. I descended past huge turning gears and pistons, silhouetted by the light of what I assumed to be an artificial sun of some kind. How did they manage that? An sun underneath the earth, a ridiculous and yet according to my own eyes a completely plausible thing. Then I descended past large plates with words cut into them, made visible by the glowing sunlight shining through.
WHY DO YOU DESERVE TO BE PART OF THIS HERD,
IF YOU WOULD NOT STAND FOR YOURSELF?
YOU HAVE BEEN LED TO THIS LAND OF SALVATION,
WHERE DESTINY IS NOT DEFINED BY STAMP OR PROPHECY.
IT IS DEFINED BY YOU.
I have to say, if there's one thing I can gather from all this it's that these people are really self-determinant.
The pod then rumbled to a halt, and the door opened wide. Immediately, the smell of moss and other stinks assaulted my nose. I stepped out into a large chamber of stone and clay, and before me was a brightly colored stained glass window of Sunset Shimmer. Unlike the image presented earlier to me, this Sunset had wings and was proportioned like any other alicorn. She was facing me, smiling warmly as she would towards any other traveler to these parts. Behind her, I could see the etchings of a city, and the four great columns which held the ceiling above it. Below this window was a stone sign saying:
PRINCESS SUNSET SHIMMER
WELCOMES YOU TO HER HERD
Someone had a god complex.
I digress, I needed to find that girl and snarking off wasn't going to help me do it. There were entrances on either side of this window. Both were giving off an odd amount of light, and while I couldn't see what was in there from my point of view, I didn't think much of it. I decided going right, it didn't seem to make much difference to me. I'm sure people go left because it doesn't make much difference either. I recall the story of one fellow in the Royal Guard who consistently always guarded a door by the right side. It was not because there was anything particularly advantageous to it, it just felt right to him. No pun intended.
And indeed, there wasn't anything interesting about this hall, went on for several meters and the only thing of note was the intricately carved smooth stonework and a weird buzzing noise. Sunset Shimmer must have hired some really mean stonemasons for this kind of stuff. Indeed, at the end of the hall, I see this hallway ends up getting joined with the other one. Now, I stood with two hallways at my back and at my front were stairs descending down into a tunnel. I could see murals painted on the walls of this tunnel, but I couldn't focus down on what they looked like because that darn buzzing was getting louder.
"Is it someone new?"
I jumped forward, stopping just short of the staircase. When I turned behind me, I saw what had taken me by surprise.
"Wha-..." was all I could make from it. It was an interesting, floating, contraption. It was no bigger than your average pegasus and unlike a pegasus it didn't appear to be using wings to fly. Instead, on either side of it were paddlewheels that spun rapidly and buzzed like a wasp. There was a tail with a spinning rotor enclosed in a circle. The body appeared to be shaped like the shell of a turtle, and it was painted yellow with a red stripe leading down the center. On the front was its "head" so to speak, where a single lightbulb of an eye glowed yellow.
It spoke mechanically but in a very friendly demeanor. "I am a Pinkerton Industries Cyclogyro Sentry Bot! I have been programmed specifically to welcome pilgrims to Princess Sunset Shimmer's land, Dream Valley." The Sentry Bot zoomed in close, and I stepped back. This thing obviously didn't know what personal space was. "I must say though, this is very interesting. We have not had any newcomers in over twenty years!"
I said, "Well, I'm just visiting." That was technically true. It probably was a bad idea to get on this buzzing pile of scrap's bad side, and I'm sure lying to him would've done it.
"Well, visitors get the same treatment regardless!" A jet of green steam came out of the Sentry Bot's top like water out of a whale's blowhole. "I will guide you through the history of the founding of Dream Valley! It is Founding Day after all! The most sacred of our holidays!" It flew past me and down into that tunnel and it called out to me, "Come along now, Pilgrim! You are embarking on an incredible journey into a world of self-determination!"
I sighed, might as well play along. I began following the Sentry Bot down the stairs and into the tunnel. I could now clearly see what these murals were all about, even with the paint having chipped away from what I assume to be low maintenance. They were a visual history of Dream Valley.
The first painting was a match, glowing in a sea of blackness, with a scroll above it being burnt by it. The scroll was labelled "Destiny" and was very dry and forlorn looking. The Sentry Bot began, "You see, Pilgrim, it all began with an idea, as all great and extraordinary things do! It was that simple spark that grew into a great fire of inspiration! Princess Sunset Shimmer had this idea, why follow the stamp on your flank at all? What free will does one possess if one has to follow it? Does that not make one a slave to destiny?"
The next painting was a pair of hoofcuffs, the chain between being broken in a fire, and off to the right a bright light led to the next painting. The Sentry Bot continued. "And so, our Princess burned the stamps from her flanks and forever freed herself from the slavery of so-called destiny!" I cringed. I heard cutie marks were supposed to be permanent, but burning them off? That was the most insane thing ever, and I had to remind myself that I was in what was practically an entire city thirty klicks underground that somehow had an artificial sky and sun.
The last painting was Sunset Shimmer, an alicorn with wings spread to their full glory, pointing out to the shining city of Dream Valley in the distance. With her was a congregation of ponies, griffons, diamond dogs, minotaurs, and mules. All of them looked humbled to be in her presence. "With her freedom from the slavery of destiny, our Princess decided that she would also provide a place of refuge for those seeking salvation from the evils of prophecy! Thus, she chose to build the self-sustaining city of Dream Valley to hide her herd away from the preying eyes of the Princess of the surface above and from the slavery of destiny and prophecy!
"The four great columns which hold the ceiling up above our city are the major triumphs of this city: knowledge, courage, harmony, and friendship! She has brought here to Dream Valley the finest examples of sentience on the planet, from scientists to artists to entrepreneurs. And here in Dream Valley, nothing defines your fate. There is no fate but what you make! Be ye pony, griffon, minotaur, mule, zebra, or dog, it is all on you!"
All this talk of self-determination was killing me. I honestly hated being lectured on things that didn't concern me. What concerned me now was finding that girl, not all this talk of fate. I sighed. "Yeah, I got it the first time, self-determination. I just need to access the city."
"And so you shall, Pilgrim!" The Sentry Bot jetted a cloud of steam from its top again and flew down further to the end of the tunnel. "But you must face the mirror and look inside yourself!"
I'd break a hundred mirrors barehooved if it got me into the city.
I stepped down the stairs. The Sentry Bot hovered next to a sign above the entrance to the next area. He read it out in full with as much as enthusiasm as an automaton could.
LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF
YOU SHALL KNOW THE TRUTH
AND THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE
When I stepped off the stairs, I felt the cool touch of water. The water was still, and felt so pure that I probably could have lapped it into my mouth. I continued on.
I had entered a long hallway. The walls were shining, reflective mirrors. The ceiling was blacked out. The Sentry Bot flew past me and to the end of the hallway, where it was obscured by a bright light. That just left me, and the millions of my reflections in these mirrors alone. I continued onward. It felt like the hall of mirrors at a carnival or something.
So this is what that thing meant by facing the mirror. A literal hallway of mirrors with which you had to look at yourself. Even the water that sloshed around me reflected me. I looked at the mirror to my left. I saw a stallion. He had an unkempt brown coat, a scruffy darker brown mane and tail, green eyes, a metal band around his right forehoof, and a satchel on his back. On his flanks were the stylization of a clay brick wall. This stallion was a gambling addict, one who had gotten himself so deep in debt that he found himself beneath the surface to pay it back. He was a raging alcoholic, and the instant you smelled him he would reek of booze. He was a former member of the Royal Guard, and for a good reason as well. I could tell from that look in that look in his eyes as well, this stallion was also a complete and utter coward who'd leave a baby in a fire to save his own skin.
This stallion was me.
Well, now that I know the truth, let's get on with it. Yeah, you'd think that by looking at myself in a mirror I'd feel uncomfortable at my appearance. That there'd be something hidden inside myself that I never knew or that maybe I'm more than just some gambling drunk. But the truth was, I just didn't care anymore. When I look into a mirror, all I see is me, and nothing else. I continued towards the end of the hall, as did the infinite number of myself in the mirrors who went in the same direction.
The light at the end of the metaphorical tunnel eventually dimmed as I got closer. I had entered a rotunda. A giant dome of iron and glass was above me, and the rays of artificial daylight gleamed through and made the water sparkle in the light. However, I most concerned with where to go. Across the rotunda was another tunnel where I could make out at the end of it grass and dirt. That was the way out. I immediately trotted over for it, but the Sentry Bot flew into my way and stopped me.
"Come on, let me through," I said to it. The Sentry Bot continued hovering in front of me. I rolled my eyes and pressed onward, but again the Sentry Bot got in my way.
"Ah, I can't let you through. Not with those stamps on your flank, Pilgrim."
"Listen, I'm not here to stay."
"If one wishes to enter the city, they must be cleansed of the slavery above!"
I sighed deeply. I just wanted to get into the city, get that girl, and be shut of all this. "Fine, do what you have to do," I said to it.
As if on cue, from the bottom of the Sentry Bot came two little mechanical arms. I wouldn't have given it much thought had those arms not fired ropes that binded my legs together and prevented me from moving. In my surprise, I fell over onto my side and into the water, yelling incoherently. I could only imagine what it was going to do next. It hovered over me as I struggled against the ropes.
"Do not struggle, Pilgrim! Consider this a blessing, a new start, a pathway to redemption!" One of the Sentry Bot's arms immediately folded into a point, which glowed yellow at the tip. Without regard to my own consent, it plunged it into my cutie mark.
I'm not going to sugarcoat it. I screamed so loud I could hear my own echoes through the rotunda. The needle point felt like it was searing through my every vein like a fire in a forest. I buckled and kicked against it, but the ropes were holding me down. The heat of the needle hissed like a snake in a desert. My flanks felt like they were going to incinerate to ashes, and eventually my legs stopped moving because I just lost all feeling them. Then, I felt the needle forcefully eject from my flank. I groaned in pain, trying to fight back tears in my eyes.
Then he turned me over. I couldn't fight it this time. Again, the needle plunged into my other flank and again that hot fiery pain shot into my muscles. I could feel blackness overcoming me, the sheer pain was tiring me out. I couldn't scream anymore, I couldn't even move anymore.
I just blacked out right there.
***
It sounded like someone was about to kick my darn door down. Knocking and banging on the door did whoever was outside no good. This office may have been built by the lowest common denominator by darn if it could hold back a robber. The events of last night still eluded me. I couldn't even remember why they were here.
"Who's there!?" I called out to them.
"Bring us the girl and wipe away the debt!"
Ugh. This again. "I'm not gonna do it!"
"We had a deal, Clayton! Open the door right now!"
Deal my hoof. I stood up from my chair and walked to the door. "I told you, go away!" I opened the door, and the bright morning sunlight blinded me.
In which Dream Valley celebrates Founding Day
***
I slowly came to in the middle of a still pool of water. From my blurred vision I could make out a paved road of concrete, grass, some trees, but lying on my side made it difficult to tell exactly where I was. Besides my coat being a little soggy, my flanks felt so numb that I couldn't even feel them moving. It's a weird experience when you can't feel something and yet you can still feel it moving around, kind of like phantom limb syndrome except without the missing limb. Of course, I wondered what the point of that darn Sentry Bot poking me in the flanks was. I turned my head to look.
My cutie mark was gone. All that was left was just simply a neat little black dot no bigger than a silver bit.
Great, now people can judge me for being a drunk, gambling, blank flank.
I sighed, and slowly but surely I stood up. Surprisingly, my legs felt perfectly fine considering that they were just impaled with a hot needle, but I chalk that up to time healing most wounds. I had to assume the mark on my other side was gone too, that Sentry Bot was quite thorough. That darn Sentry Bot wouldn't know how to "cleanse" if someone handed it a wet mop and told it to clean.
Then again, it was my darn fault. I really shouldn't have told him to do it.
Strangely enough though, now that my cutie mark was gone, I felt weird. Normally, when you're a foal and you get your cutie mark you feel compelled to do whatever it is that cutie mark tells you to. This dies out a bit when you get older, but not completely. However there's always something at the back of my head telling to build something out of clay instead of join the Royal Guard or take a job that actually makes you money. Now however, that little thing was just simply gone. It was as if it just packed up and left because apparently fiery needle points weren't its thing. I guess that part about burning your cutie marks off is true, it does kind of liberate you. I never had much use of my special talent anyway. I can imagine the reaction of any other pony though, just the loss of something that makes you unique, the talent that you're just born with and which will come to completely define you in later life.
This was making my head hurt, I hate thinking.
Out in the what I assumed to be afternoon sun, I took in my surroundings. This pool of water led back into the building where I got my marks burnt off through a tunnel. Otherwise though, it looked like I was in an enclosed park of some sort. I stepped onto a concrete road, which was surrounded by wildly growing grass and unkempt trees. There were dandelions and crabgrass everywhere. Around me were high walls, adorned with stylized carvings of ponies. Ahead of me was a large wooden gate, trimmed with gold and looked to be built strong. I walked up to it. Even without my cutie marks, I still had a job to do. I pushed the doors open.
For a second I had been blinded by the bright daylight, but as my eyes focused I could see. Down some stairs and ahead was a large plaza, big enough to fit a couple of full grown dragons and have some room to spare. At the center of this plaza was an immense stone statue of a heroically rearing alicorn, an effigy of Sunset Shimmer. Overhead I could see rails curve and zigzag with containers riding below them like a train. Most importantly however, I could see ponies. All kinds of them, pegasi, unicorns, earth ponies, and they were all in fine dress and saddle as if I hadn't left Canterlot and descended underground.
I took a deep breath and slowly I went down those stairs into the plaza. As I walked, excited chatter filled the air. I could hear people go on about Founding Day and how they were going to celebrate.
A pegasus mare, beautiful one wearing a frilly saddle walked along with another pegasus mare. "You going to the Founding Day Raffle?"
Her friend chuckled. "Who isn't? I bet I'll win this year!"
"Since when you did suddenly become a prophet?" They laughed as they moseyed along. Mares, never understood them.
You know, I'd be more excited by raffles if I ever won them. First things first though, I had to get my bearings. This plaza was surrounded on all sides by buildings, shops and stores and delicatessens of all kinds with streets going out in every cardinal direction except behind me. I could see however the big statue of the Alicorn out in the distance, penetrating the cloud cover like a mountain. To confirm, I pulled out that little picture of it from my satchel and compared it, and they matched up like identical twins. That was where I needed to head.
***
Honestly though, something about Dream Valley felt familiar. Maybe it was the architecture of it, all of it felt like I was still in Canterlot. Big white spires, clean paved roads, castle architecture made for looks instead of purpose, all of it felt like the capital city of Equestria. Even the ponies all looked like they stepped out of Canterlot, with their fine dresses and clothing which screamed "rich" and "complete ass" to me. I don't know what the definition of irony is, but if these people really wanted to get away from Equestria they couldn't be any closer to it in looks.
I carried on though, Canterlot was a pipe dream if I didn't get this job finished. Now that I thought about it, I needed a way out of this city and I don't imagine that Sentry Bot is keen on letting people leave the way they came. The occasional airship often floated by, spouting crud about how Princess Sunset Shimmer saved her herd or how this year's celebration of Founding Day was the best yet. It wasn't relevant right now. I personally thought all this talk of self-determination was a load of bull, but then again I was raised in a nice family who taught me having a cutie mark was the best thing ever.
A poster on a wall caught my eye however. It was a cartoonishly devilish portrayal of a griffon holding a lit bomb, probably intending to toss it into that crowd of singing schoofoals. On the bottom of the poster it read:
BEWARE THE ANARCHIST
HE IS AN AGENT OF CHAOS
There was another poster next to that one as well. A very evil looking batpony with a bomb for a cutie mark bearing his teeth at a scared mare and her foal. This poster had this to say at the bottom:
THEY'LL TAKE YOUR HOMES
THEY'LL TAKE YOUR LIVES
THEY'LL TAKE YOUR WIVES
DEFEND ALL YOU HAVE
Seems Dream Valley isn't the perfect utopia it makes itself out to be. I continued on. Now that I thought about it though, anarchy wasn't exactly welcome back in Equestria either. Always harmony, harmony, harmony. I probably say this a lot, but I can only imagine the lengths these people go to maintain that order. I remember the days back in the Royal Guard when we had to bust the occasional radical or evict some hobos out of a park who keep protesting that they're the people. The thought that that kind of anarchy not only exists down here but is apparently worse is kind of frightening. If worse comes to worse though, these anarchists might end up my only friends in town. I shuddered at the thought.
A group of foals ran by me, laughing and shouting at each other.
"Come on!" the lead one shouted. "We're gonna be late for the raffle!"
These people really liked that raffle of theirs. I stopped however, for something more important than anarchy or raffles quite literally floated by.
An airship, a large one not unlike the yachts of the Canterlot nobility, was flying low over the buildings. Unlike most airships in Equestria, this one looked a lot more practical. The cabin was attached directly to the balloon instead of by cable, and two wings stuck out with propeller engines providing thrust. On the side of the airship was an image of Sunset Shimmer, looking down proudly at what she was holding: a lavender unicorn foal. A sun glimmered behind this foal as if she were the chosen one of some ancient prophecy. Over a loudspeaker, someone spoke.
"When our Princess Sunset Shimmer founded the glorious city of Dream Valley, even she knew she would pass on. So with magic, love, and peace, she gave birth to her legacy! The Lamb of Dream Valley!"
Lavender unicorn. I started putting the pieces together like a puzzle. The Lamb of Dream Valley, if she is this lavender unicorn, then she'd probably be the same one in that photo. The same unicorn who's being held in that statue. Apparently this Lamb is worshipped as the legacy of Dream Valley, the heir to Princess Sunset Shimmer's rule, and most likely the ultimate hope of Dream Valley.
Okay, my job just got a little more complicated.
Regardless of complications though, the basic wording of the deal didn't change. Bring us the girl and wipe away the debt. Nobody ever said anything about this girl apparently being some kind of messiah nor did anybody say this girl would be in some kind of hidden refuge several miles underground. I guess as Daring Do would do, I'll just make things up as I go along. Not like I had a plan going into Dream Valley anyway. I mean really, how hard could this be? My only real concern was getting her, then finding a way out of this giant cave city.
I heard the pops and bursts of fireworks going off. Bottle rockets exploded in the air in bright flashes of color. I was really getting some amount of culture shock here or whatever it's called. That sky up there wasn't a sky at all, it was just some kind of blue... thing that maybe Sunset Shimmer concocted up to make it appear like one. In reality there's probably a bunch of stalactites hanging from that ceiling ready to crush the ever loving daylights out of this city. Even that sun looked real, and it definitely wasn't. I bet Sunset Shimmer raises that and lowers it day by day and then repeats the process with an artificial moon. It's like you haven't even left the surface.
I pondered briefly on it, maybe I should live here after I get that girl. Seemed like a nice enough place, minus the so-called "anarchists" but I'm a tough guy. Never take on a tough guy, especially if they're former Royal Guard, and especially if they're plastered like a statue. I definitely wouldn't fit in on the surface now that I don't have a cutie mark. I'd have to figure all this out later though, job comes first. I got enough to worry about without trailing off like an earth pony in cider season. I kept my ear out for anything important though.
A mare, nobility from the sounds of it, asked someone, "So, who are you voting for the city council?"
Another mare, who spoke maturely and thus was probably an intellectual, responded, "I think I'll put my vote in for Sparkler."
"Sparkler? That Vox Dei radical?"
"Well, that radical seems to be the only one willing to stamp out the anarchists."
"Oh, I wish you'd have more faith in our Princess."
Votes. Now that I thought about it, democracy was actually a pretty foreign concept to me. I don't really remember ever voting anybody. Then again, I lived in the capital city that happened to serve as the throne for the all powerful Princess whose rule is never questioned by anybody. I'm sure democracy existed in those hick towns like Ponyville. I was just a Royal Guard back then, I didn't care, I just followed orders.
And speaking of following orders, I was getting a little closer to the Alicorn. Ahead of me stood a huge arch, sort of like the big one in the city of Cheval. It had fine flowery carvings along the top, and from the top hung banners with images of Sunset Shimmer the alicorn. You know, I was kind of getting sick of seeing her everywhere. Even Princess Celestia wasn't this in love with herself.
When I stepped under the arch, I could see the Alicorn in all its glory. It was still a good way off, but I could see the pentagonal base at the bottom. I could also see the rest of the city for myself. Apparently this part of the city was a lot more elevated than the rest. I could see curving streets, buildings mashed together, and all of it glowing beautifully under that artificial sun. Some really good real estate they had here. I headed right past the arch.
Now, I'm not much of a thinker, but as I was walking along the street I did have to wonder: where the heck did this city come from? I could see lots of ponies playing around, going about their days, all of them were missing cutie marks like I did. Where did those ponies come from? I can't believe a city like this even exists.
I continued on until I came to what seemed like a fairground. A lot of brightly colored yellow and red tents were set up. Barkers in boater hats were shouting and advertising like no one's business. People were competing in shooting contests, horseshoe tossing tournaments, and all kinds of ponies were simply enjoying themselves. It felt like a regular Summer Sun Celebration back in Canterlot. Actually takes me back to when I was a kid and I got to fish for goldfish. My parents never let me keep them though, they always said I wasn't responsible enough to take care of them.
In more ways than one, they were completely right.
But I digress. I'd imagine any national holiday has a fair and I don't believe Dream Valley is any different. I was still a little full from that apple I had back down aways, but that didn't mean I couldn't do a little exploring.
"Come one! Come all! Come see the future of magic, courtesy of our fair Princess and of Dream Valley's finest griffon, Pinkerton!" a barker shouted. That caught my attention, and I walked over to the source of his shouts. He stood atop a tall stage, complete with red curtains behind him and with large horns to project his voice out into the growing audience. I, being a relatively big stallion, could see over the heads of the curious mares, stallions, and foals quite easily. Then, two earth ponies dressed mockingly as Princess Celestia and Luna jumped out from nowhere and in front of the barker.
The barker continued on, pointing to the pony dressed as Celestia. "If I told you that an earth pony could hoist a full grown pony with naught but his mind, would you believe me?" The Celestia actor then pointed his hoof at the Luna actor. By magic, a yellow burst of magic shot from the pavement below and shot Luna up several feet into the air. Luna, after doing a tuck and roll, then came back to terra firma when this magic dissipated. The crowd gave excited murmurs and gasps at the sight, some applauding, a little too soon if I might add.
"If I told you an earth pony could conjure lightning from his hooves, would you believe me?" Luna, as if on command, then reared up and rubbed her forehooves together. Then, as she brought them apart, electricity shot in between them with crackles and fizzling noises. The crowd screamed in excitement and wonder and I had to admit, even I was becoming a little excited.
"Well, I tell you what, thanks to Dream Valley's own Pinkerton Industries, we can turn these tall tales and stories of flying pigs into reality! With just a swig, you can have the magic ability of a powerful unicorn, be ye pegasus, earth pony, mule, zebra, or even a tortoise for all I care! You know our Princess is wise and just, and she has asked Mister Pinkerton, in person, to bring you these divine feats of magic! Need a solution? Drink a Potion!"
Potions. Very interesting. I'd like to test some of those out when I get the time. I certainly find the idea of shooting lightning from my hooves very useful, would definitely help out in games of Liar's Dice.
I continued on, and I actually found myself feeling somewhat like a colt again. I know I already said stuff like this earlier, but there's just this weird feeling of nostalgia when you visit a fair. The smell of popcorn, the excited cheers when you win a game, the taste of cotton candy, the advertising of products, all of it just takes me back. I could even hear the live folk songs being played, violins and banjos and guitars being wonderfully handled by the most humblest of ponies.
Another booth, a little more modest than the Potions one, had his own barker. "Voxocrystals! Voxocrystals! See the wonder of the Crystal Empire, hear your voice from the past in the present!" That seemed interesting enough. I stepped up to the booth, and found on the counter a blue crystal crystal encased in a metal ring, a large claw jutting out from the ring and poking into the crystal. Hooked up to the ring was a microphone stand, and curiously I stood next to it, as if I was going to know more about it by just looking at it.
"Say something, sonny!" the Barker said to me. He nearly caught me by surprise. What to say though?
"What's a voxocrystal?" I said very imaginatively. The crystal then began glowing as the claw tapped the crystal.
Clayton: What's a voxocrystal?
The voxocrystal pulsated with every inflection in my voice. I really hated hearing my own voice, was just very strange to me.
"Exactly that!" the Barker explained, "A personal record of voice! If you need to look back on something, just record it and it's there whenever you need it!"
I looked over to him and said, "Just so we're clear, I'm not paying for this."
"Merely a demonstration, Sir," he said back with an unfailing smile. Hey, just because I'm having a nostalgia trip doesn't mean anypony can just trick me out of my bits. All five of those bits. In fact, I really needed to continue on. I can't get caught up in this darn festival stuff.
***
"Score one for Dream Valley! The anarchists defeated! Dream Valley is in safe hooves! You earned this!"
I took my prize of thirty bits from the Barker. Turns out, firing an airgun at cardboard cutouts of stereotypical images of griffons, batponies, and zebras is incredibly easy.
Okay, I lied. I let myself get caught up in this festival stuff. Thankfully, all those shooting gallery games earned me quite the generous sum of sixty bits total. I knew learning how to shoot guns would be important. But, two hours had passed, and while time wasn't imperative I knew that I needed to get this girl out quickly and stealthily. So enough eating cotton candy and blasting cardboard anarchists, it was time to go to work.
I continued on through the festival, occasionally bumping past a pony or losing my focus on something interesting. I actually lost focus entirely when I spotted it.
According to the Barker advertising it, it was called a Draft Pony. From one side of the stage, you had a picture of a bedridden mare, looking incredibly sick and forlorn and below it the word BEFORE. On the other side, you had a mare in a crisp clean dress, with some wires poking out the back of her head and into her back, who was smiling as she sang to a hummingbird with the word AFTER under it.
The actual Draft Pony looked nothing like the picture.
What I saw on the strange was a gargantuan metal beast rather than pony. It was three times bigger than the Barker shouting out the immortal miracle of the Pinkerton MFG Autobody Mark One. The bronze colored metal body looked terrifically skeletal. In the chest was a heart in a jar connected to a bunch of wires, visible from the sides. The Draft Pony's head was concealed behind a metal helmet, with only the bloodshot fear-filled eyes visible behind green lenses. On its back was a boiler, which occasionally let out a jet of steam, and it had tubes which fed directly into the helmet. The Draft Pony sat, covering itself with the metal claws attached to its front hooves from the flash photography. With every flash, it gave off a pained mechanical yelp.
"My word," a mare looked at the Draft Pony with a frown. She said, "He looks so sad."
A stallion scoffed at that. "How can you be sad when you have strength and immortality?"
I don't know about that. I decided the best course of action was to continue on. Better it than me really.
"Samples! Free samples!" Oooh. Free stuff. Who doesn't love free stuff? I looked over to the source. At a blue booth was a lovely looking mare, with baskets of potions in hoof, advertising her product. "Has a vender ever stolen a bit, has a pay telephone refused to connect you with a beloved spouse, or perhaps a gun misfires on you in the heat of the moment? Well, it's time to take control back from the machine spirits!"
In this basket were Potions labelled "Mesmerize". They were strange little bottles of green liquid, corked by a red heart shaped top. I walked to them, the mare seductively smiled at me. Whoever opened this booth knew how to draw the crowd. Anyway, free stuff, I took a bottle and uncorked it.
"With just a whisper..." she whispered quietly to me, "they're all ears."
I took a helping swig of it. Tasted strangely like oranges.
But then, I felt my vision becoming blurry, the edges becoming black. I could hear whispers from nowhere, indecipherable yet completely understandable. The mare giggled as she drew out a heart, a magic green smoke that I was sure wasn't actually there tracing it out. Then, she blew me a kiss, and her form took a sultry green smokey color.
My vision immediately recovered, everything returned to normal, and I suddenly felt less tired than I did when I drank it.
"What was that?" I asked to no one in particular. The mare giggled at me, she must have thought this was some kind of joke.
"That was Mesmerize. Just cast it, and the machines are all yours, hon." I stepped past her, with the wise decision that this darn Potion business would probably end up burning my hooves off or something. She shouted to me as I left her, "And remember to keep topped off Sugars, or else you won't be able to use it!"
Potions and Sugars. Mental note, both are important.
***
As I continued on, I found that my forehooves occasionally glowed green. That must be how pegasi and earth ponies cast it I guess. I don't know anything about this Potion business, but I sure know that magic is difficult to control without experience. Being a unicorn and all, I have lots of experience. Pegasi and earth ponies don't. I can only imagine the chaos of the testing phase of these darn things.
I walked past some open gates underneath a big sign that read:
20TH FOUNDING DAY RAFFLE
SPONSORED BY
PINKERTON MFG INDUSTRIES
Interesting, except...
I was stopped by two unicorn mares. They were both smiling rather warmly at me, but I couldn't help myself to smile back at them. Why?
Because these were the two mares back on the boat.
You know, back on the surface.
Rosetta, whom held a fine dinner plate in her magic grip, spoke first. "Heads or tails, Mister Clayton?"
"What..." I was trying to process the situation in my head here. "I don't-"
Iris flipped a coin to me, which I deftly caught with a magic grip. She said in a more forceful manner, "Heads or tails, Mister Clayton?"
Uh.
I looked at the coin, and found that it was just a regular gold bit. Though instead of Celestia on one side, it was Sunset Shimmer. I kind of expected that though. Unlike these two. Should I really indulge them in their game? Will they tell me how they got down here if I did?
Probably not.
I sighed, then flipped the coin to them. "Tails," I called.
The coin clattered as it landed on the plate. Both Rosetta and Iris looked at it expectantly. It landed on tails.
Rosetta looked to Iris with a smug expression. "Told you," she said. Iris simply rolled her eyes as she lifted up a piece of chalk. Rosetta turned left, and revealed to me that she was wearing a sandwich board. On this side was heads, which was completely empty, and tails which had now twenty three marks. As Iris scratched the twenty third mark one, Rosetta seemed to not able to resist commenting. "The victories that just keep coming are the best ones, don't you think so, Miss Iris?"
"Well, I suppose I should have seen this coming."
"Oh, chin up. There's always next time."
"That's what you said last time."
"Fair point."
And with that, they walked past and faded into a crowd of ponies. I swear I could spot the other side of the board, and there were another hundred marks for tails. I sighed, I didn't have time for this kind of weirdo stuff.
I pressed onwards, and in keeping my ears alert, I heard a far off voice. He was probably amplified by a microphone, but what was more is that he sounded very jolly.
"Hahah! My oh my! Is it really dat time o' year agin? Founding Day jus' seems tae come fae no'er I tell you what! Why, I recall when I was jus' a wee lad..."
A mare, also having her voice amped by a microphone interrupted. "Oh, go on, Mister Pinkerton! Start the raffle!"
"Ahahah! I will me lass, ye aw here oot an' aboot for this here raffle and I will nae deny that! Ye know, it seemed like only yesterday that I meself was holding my own stone and I thought tae meself, 'Pinky, this year! It oughta be me!' Real funny story that I tell you what!'"
The same mare groaned playfully, "Come on, Mister Pinkerton! Let's go!" There were shouts of agreement, all playfully begging Pinkerton to start.
"Aye, aye? Dae me ears work today? Ye aw want me to 'start the raffle?' Well, g'night Irene! Settle, settle doon. I guess I will, but 'fore that!"
And with that, the guitars began strumming and the violins began playing. They were breaking out into song.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and auld lang syne?
For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.
Hm. I've never heard that song before. Then again, if Dream Valley did exist for twenty years, there's no reason they shouldn't have their own songs too. I continued on, through the fair and past gathering ponies to the source of this music. As much as I really shouldn't, I had to note there really wasn't any other way through. Besides, I felt like testing my luck at a raffle, as much I didn't like them.
I saw two pegasi mares in grey police uniforms. One of them had on her left forehoof a strange device. It was like a gauntlet, but instead of a glove on the end, it was more of a spinning gear which whirred like a saw. On the leg part was forged metal, with a glowing green crystal embedded into it. She was showing it off to the other officer.
"Is that one of the new Rail Tracers?" the mare without the Rail Tracer asked.
"Sure is," and with that the gear stopped spinning. It then separated into four distinct pieces and compacted around the gauntlet. The mare continued. "Whole division got them. We need everything we can get if we want to flush the anarchists out of the rail system."
"Got an opening? I'd love to bust a couple of skulls together."
"I swear, Lightning Dust, you can't seem to stray from a fight."
The two mares chuckled to themselves as I walked by. I wouldn't want to be on the business end of that thing.
Then, I came up to a sign in the path. It was a simple image of a foreleg, glowing red in the dark. That foreleg bore a metal band around it, permanently affixed to the leg through an incredibly painful process.
Why did I know this? Because that was my metal band around my right foreleg. I read the words accompanying the image.
BEWARE THE AGENT OF CHAOS
YOU WILL KNOW HIM BY HIS BAND
I looked over the band on my right foreleg. Matched the one on the picture too. A simple metal band, riveted onto my leg to boot. No pun intended. Did someone plan this? I decided to continue on, because so far no one recognized me as a so-called "agent of chaos" yet and I was sure if I was careful I'd be fine.
Then I came up to the gates, the music was becoming louder as I came closer. I could hear Pinkerton encourage everyone to join in the chorus.
We two have run about the slopes,
and picked the daisies fine
But we’ve wandered many a weary foot,
since auld lang syne.
I walked past, and soon I found myself in a crowd of singing and cheerful ponies. There was a big stage. On that stage, gesturing like a conductor at an orchestra was a griffon. He was immaculately dressed in a fine suit and top hat, and on his beak rested a pair of glasses for his grey eyes. He cheered and sang along with the ponies as well. That must have been Pinkerton.
We two have paddled in the stream,
from morning sun till dine
But seas between us broad have roared
since auld lang syne.
For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.
And with the finish of the chorus, the crowd broke out into loud cheers and applause. Pinkerton himself clapped too. I noticed that on his right arm, a talon was missing. He seemed to pay it no mind though.
"The Twentieth Founding Day Raffle has official begun!" he yelled. The crowd again whistled and clapped.
"Hey, mister!" I looked around, was it Rosetta and Iris again? No, it was just some random mare. She had snuck up on me while I was distracted by Pinkerton. She held up a basket of stones, all of them with numbers painted on them. "Go on," she said, "grab one! Maybe you'll win!"
I took a stone, with my left foreleg, and looked at the number on it. "Number twenty-three..." I said to myself.
"That's a lucky number," she said to me. She then walked away and in a sultry tone she said, "I'll be rooting for you."
"Bring me the bowl!" Pinkerton called. A different mare trotted up to him on stage, carrying with her a bowl labelled Pinkerton MFG Industries. "Drum roll please!" A snare drum somewhere out of my vision began buzzing. "The winner of this year's raffle is..." He reached into the bowl with his right arm, and with his remaining talons pulled out a card. The crowd murmured and whispered in anticipation. Even I was getting a little excited.
Wait a second. I'm forgetting something here.
"Number twenty three!"
A small chuckle escaped me. "Well, what do you know," I said. The crowd quickly realized who had won and applauded me. That was good old pony modesty for you.
Pinkerton looked down at me, giving a genuine grin at me. "Number twenty three, come an claim yer prize!" With that, the curtains behind me began rising. What was my prize I wondered? I needed to claim it quickly otherwise these people might recognize me as that agent of chaos person. Then I saw my prize. "First throw!"
The two batponies stepped forward in chains, with cue cards taped to them reading "Anarchist!" and "Parasite!". Their mouths were taped over so that I wouldn't hear their muffled protests. They looked positively fear filled as they struggled against their bindings. They stood on the stage, they couldn't run because of the police security and the sheer amount of ponies with stones to throw at them. They looked at me, and I could see in their eyes dread and a little bit of hope that I wouldn't toss this stone at them.
Pinkerton looked down at me and said, "Well, whaddya waiting for? Ye gonna toss it? Or are ye gonna 'peacefully demonstrate' like these suckers did?" Pinkerton gave a hearty laugh at this little statement of his. The other ponies laughed alongside him as well. I could hear encouragement from other ponies beside me.
"Throw it! Give those anarchists what for!"
"Yeah! Give that stone a toss!"
I looked down at the stone in my hoof. This was a lot to comprehend in such little time. I'd gone from losing my cutie mark to stoning peaceful protesters.
Boy, this escalated quickly.
