Gelatin
A My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfic By Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan based parody. MLP:FiM is the property of Hasbro and Lauren Faust. Please support the official release.
"So Pinkie Pie, what's the occasion?" Twilight Sparkle asked as the pink-colored mare cheerfully showed her friends into her home. It was done up, as usual, for a celebration in gaily colored ribbons and streamers and with the warm pink paint of the walls presented a cheerful atmosphere.
"Oh, it's a surprise! Just wait and see!" Pinkie Pie said cheerfully. She bounced into the kitchen, leaving her friends to wait.
"What do you think it is? Gummy's New Girlfriend Party was last week," Twilight asked aloud.
"Ah don't think him gnawing on a rubber gator toy counts," Applejack said dryly.
"Love can take all different forms," Fluttershy said softly. "A turtle near my house keeps giving flowers to a rock. Poor thing, she's so lonely."
"Maybe we can hook her up with Speedy! He's the stallion-est turtle in all of Equestria!" Rainbow Dash said with a bright smile.
"Ahem?" Twilight cleared her throat to get everypony's attention. "If we could focus?"
"I believe we'll get our answer soon enough, Twilight," Rarity said with a serene smile. "And the answer, whatever it is, will surely be..." Rarity trailed off for a moment as Pinkie Pie pushed her surprise into the room on a cart. Rarity's eyes then grew to a very large size and her jaw dropped.
"Surprise!" Pinkie Pie said with a grin as she hopped in front of the gigantic, multi-colored stack of fruit and candy covered gelatin. All of Pinkie Pie's friends backed away.
"Oh my goodness gracious, Pinkie Pie!" Fluttershy whispered, horrified. "Wh-What have you done?"
"Th-That monstrosity! You can't be serious!" Rarity gasped, holding a hoof to her mouth.
"I think I'm going to be sick," moaned Twilight.
"By Celestia's fetlock clippin's, have you lost yer mind?" Applejack cried.
"Was this the idea of that damn bucket of turnips?" Rainbow Dash demanded angrily. "WAS IT? WAS IT?"
"Hm? What?" Pinkie Pie looked back at the gelatin construct, then back at her horrified friends. Her mouth then made an 'o' of understanding, and she giggled.
"Oh no! Silly willy fillies, where have you been? They don't need to make Jell-O from horse bones and hooves any more!"
"Then what is it made from?" Twilight demanded. Pinkie Pie produced the package. Twilight took it into her hooves and studied it.
"'Pony Safe... All natural ingredients, none of them from ponies,'" Twilight read. Rarity breathed a sigh of relief, as the rest of the ponies calmed down.
"Oh good! For a moment, I was worried..."
"All right girls! Let's dig in!" Pinkie Pie cheered, hoofing out spoons to them all. Twilight laughed and smiled.
"We're sorry for thinking you'd use... You know... Ponies in your Jell-O."
"Of course I wouldn't!" Pinkie Pie laughed as she pointed at the package. "Look on the back!"
Twilight Sparkle did.
"Hmmm... 'Made from 100% human?'"
"Bon appetite!" Pinkie Pie said with a wink, just before digging out a spoonful and popping it into her mouth. "Mmmm..." She grinned.
"Delicious~..."
Just a dark bit of fun to mock a recurring trope concerning glue I've seen in a few fics. No humans were harmed in the making of this story.
Except for Bob. Sorry Bob, that was my bad.
A Short Cut
By Andrew J. Talon
For EqD's 300 Word Flash Event...
Luna blinked and yawned. She blinked the sleep from her eyes and slowly her head rose as the sun began to slip behind the mountains. She shook her head and emerged from under her covers. She trotted across her chambers to the well apportioned bathroom to begin her nightly ritual.
She entered it, picked up her toothbrush, and looked into the mirror. Her toothbrush fell as did her jaw.
“GYAH!” She cried.
“Mm? Something wrong, dear Sister?” Princess Celestia asked, poking her head inside. Her eyebrows rose, and she raised a hoof to cover her mouth. “Mmph...”
“Sister! Laugh, and I will end you!” Luna snarled from underneath what looked like a scale, fuzzy model of the universe. It took a moment for Celestia to realize it was her mane, glowing brightly.
“Mmmph... Hehehehe...!” She giggled. “Sorry Luna, but you really do look a fright! How did it happen?”
“I don’t know!” Luna said, frustrated. “All I remember is examining the Elements of Harmony last night for my studies, and when I woke up I was... Was... POOFY!”
“Hmmm,” Celestia said. “It’s possible you just got exposed to a bit of residual magical energy from them. And given your hair is magical in nature...”
“Oh lovely, I’ve become a magiron absorber,” Luna grumbled as she fished out her abacus and began doing calculations. “I can’t go out like THIS! I’d need a thaumaturgy purge equal to five hundred ganondorfs!”
“Well, perhaps you could offset the radiation somewhat?” Celestia suggested. “That might make it dissipate faster.”
“Yes, but it would require others who are linked to the Elements of Harmony, and the only ones who are... Are...” Luna stared at Celestia. “Sister, why are you grinning?”
“Ahhhh! My hair!” Twilight cried, her mane now arranged in so many different directions it could qualify as a bird’s nest. “No, what’s causing this, get down!”
“AH! Behave, behave!” Rainbow Dash cried, flying around as her mane and tail stood on end and crackled with lightning. “Rarity, I need your girly hair products NOW!”
“YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN, DARLING!” Rarity screamed, literally fighting off her coiffure with a pair of scissors and a curling iron. “Back, back! I am your mistress, OBEY!”
Applejack looked at herself in a mirror in dread. “Ah... Ah’m... Curlier than the hair on a sheep!” She groaned.
“THAT’S where they went!” Pinkie Pie cried, her hair perfectly flat and smooth. She pounced on the Apple farmer. “Give them back NOW!”
“AH! PINKIE, WHAT IN TARNATION-?!”
Fluttershy, for her part, was now a big, pink, puffy cottonball of a pony unable to move.
“Help,” Fluttershy whimpered. “If you please...?”
Luna stared down at Ponyville, using her sight beyond sight to observe the chaos, and then turned to look over at the hysterically laughing Celestia.
“You’re absolutely horrible, do you know that?” Luna growled.
"It fixed your hair didn't it?"
"Yes, but you ruined theirs!" Luna protested
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Well, you know what they say, heeheehee... Hair today, shorn tomorrow, ahahahahahaha!” Celestia cackled, rolling onto her back. Luna sighed.
"Honestly sister, that joke is older than we are..."
I know, I'm awful.
Three: Progress Yet to be Made
Progress
Luna versus Twilight Sparkle
DISCLAIMER:Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan-made work of prose. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the property of Hasbro. Please support the official release.
Some distance south of Ponyville, on the edge of the Everfree Forest laid the Ghastly Gorge, a desolate and dangerous canyon system. No ponies went there that could avoid it for a variety of reasons, from the wall eels to the treacherous rapids of the river that flow periodically.
Twilight had gotten quite the look at it during Rainbow Dash’s Pet Race, and for most ponies that would be more than enough. However, as many had observed, she was not a regular pony.
Neither, for that matter, was Princess Luna.
The alicorn in question was flying high above her, a dark speck against the bright blue sky. Twilight took deep breaths, focusing herself and her energies.
“ARE YOU READY, TWILIGHT SPARKLE?” Luna bellowed down. Twilight gritted her teeth and began to form energy at the tip of her horn.
“READY!” She shouted back.
At the end of the gorge, Hoyden and Sundance sat in a wagon observing the proceedings though binoculars. Twilight knew this because she could see the glint of sunlight off their lenses. As well as the armored bunker they were peeking out.
Twilight gulped, and tried to focus on what she had to do. Her horn glowed, and a shield bubble appeared around her. Above, the cloud gathered and began to cyclone above Luna as her horn crackled and sparked with electricity. Arcs of power left the tip of her horn, setting off similar lightning arcs throughout the now palpable storm. Luna’s eyes glowed as the aurora seemed to billow through her long mane, and the wind kicked up. The moon princess’s fury during the Nightmare Night celebration seemed insignificant next to the raw power she was displaying now.
The glints of the binoculars vanished into the bunker, and Twilight redoubled her efforts. Her shield crackled with energy, and became more opaque. It glowed brightly and the ground cracked underneath the bubble’s concentrated kinetic force. She grunted in exertion as she pushed as much of her magical power into the shield as she could, and still more followed. It glowed brightly, like a small purple star had fallen to Earth and was shining upwards.
An orb like a miniature sun appeared on the tip of Luna’s horn, and she flapped her wings harder against the wind. Lightning arced from her body, striking trees and rocks below. The orb grew larger, now almost bright enough to blind any pony looking up at it.
The wind grew ever stronger, blowing dust and small rocks across the bottom of the gorge.
“HERE IT COMES!” Luna bellowed, and Twilight stilled her shaking knees.
The orb grew, bigger, bigger, encompassing Luna entirely and it was like a new sun was suspended in the sky overhead. Then it burst-Releasing all of its energy into a massive beam that washed over Twilight like a river of flames.
Just before they hit, Twilight allowed herself a thought not tasked with maintaining the shield:
This may have been a bad idea...!
This was such a bad idea...! Sundance thought as the ground shuddered and the very air around them seemed to crash with the force of the blast. Even a mile distant they had felt the power of Luna’s attack, and Sundance was left trembling in fear.
Hoyden though whooped and cheered as though the very earth had become a roller coaster.
“WOO HOO! YEAH!”
The trembling subsided, and the light above the bunker died down. Slowly,
Hoyden slowly poked his head back up over the bunker. He whistled as he looked at the extent of the destruction. Sundance joined him, looking green.
“Oh wow... Look at the size of that hole!” Hoyden said.
“That’s not a hole, Hoyden... That’s a canyon,” Sundance said in awe.
Below, the gorge had been widened almost double the original size, and that enlargement ran down the gorge way for what seemed like a mile. Rocks were still falling from the sky, and so Sundance opened her umbrella and tightened the straps on her helmet. Hoyden looked over at his wife with a keen grin.
“Come on Sundance, there’s nothing to be afraid of!”
“The princess just tore the earth a new hole,” Sundance said flatly. “I’m not taking any chances!”
Hoyden normally would tease her once again for being so cautious, but given her condition he wisely kept his mouth shut.
“Actually, why did you come?” Hoyden asked. Sundance sighed and rubbed her head.
“The same reason I always come... In case Luna goes overboard.” She looked up and saw Luna descend towards the bottom of the still smoking gorge. A glint of purple could be seen, and Sundance felt her breath catch in her throat.
“Like she might have this time...”
“Come on, you’re talking about the mare who beat Discord himself,” Hoyden said with a smile. Sundance gave Hoyden a wry look.
“And the princess who defeated him before.”
Hoyden was silent for a moment. He slowly nodded.
“Come on, let’s go check it out,” Hoyden said. He helped her into a small pedal copter, and together they flew down to where Luna was landing.
Luna put her hooves down and frowned deeply. In the middle of a pile of rocks, Twilight lay groaning.
“Are you all right, Twilight Sparkle?” Luna asked.
Twilight groaned again, and very, very slowly got up onto her hooves. Her legs shook, as though she was trying to stand for the first time. She lifted her head and grimaced.
“Ohhh...”
“I... May have gone just a bit overboard,” Luna said carefully.
“Oh gee, ya think?” Sundance called from behind her. Luna looked back over her shoulder and saw her hoofmaiden and Hoyden set down. Sundance came out, carrying a first aid kit in her teeth. She gave Luna a dire look that made the goddess wince, as she set the kit down and got to work examining Twilight.
“Honestly, it’s a miracle she’s even alive!” Sundance huffed. “And that we don’t have half the valley racing towards us to figure out what happened!”
“The Gorge is pretty isolated,” Twilight managed as Sundance bandaged up some bruises on her legs. “That’s... That’s why I chose it.”
“I’ve gotta say, that was incredible!” Hoyden at last said. “I mean, you just... Boom! And Twilight was all Krrsshh, and we were like Ahhh, well Sundance was but-” Hoyden coughed at Sundance’s glare and gave her a contrite look. “Well you were!”
“To be honest, that’s how I was too,” Twilight said. She looked up at Luna, who even now had an uncertain look. The unicorn gave Luna a smile. “But... But that’s what I wanted.”
“Here, drink this,” Sundance said, hoofing over the water bottle. Twilight took several grateful gulps, before she looked up at Luna. She smiled.
“So... How’d I do?”
“You’re alive, that’s a passing grade in of itself,” Luna said dryly.
Author's Note
Just a bit of Progress I didn't know how to continue but didn't want to put in the main fic. So it's here.
