Chapter 1 – Snark
“Horse apples!” Came the irritated cry of one Princess Twilight Sparkle. “That didn’t work at all! I’ve spent all night wasting my time!”
A groan came from the bottom of the stairs as baby dragon with light purple scales and a green belly came staggering up, rubbing his eyes sleepily. “What’s going on Twilight?”
“What do you think?” She replied, a little more harshly than she intended, “I’ve spent the last seven hours studying and reviewing nearly every book about quantum and theoretical physics in the royal library, all in an attempt to create an instantaneous teleportation spell which could revolutionize magical theory as we know it, and what are my results? Go on, guess. No, seriously, guess!”
“Uh…”
“TWO INCHES!” The sleep-deprived princess exclaimed, “I’ve moved all of two inches, and the only other notable distance is that I’m facing the door instead of the window! Well, whoop-dee-doo! Hooray for me!” And with that rant out of her system, Twilight released a long, irritated sigh and collapsed on her haunches.
She was back in the observatory at Canterlot Castle. Princess Celestia had asked Twilight to move back in temporarily for her own convenience, as she would spend the next several weeks studying Equestrian law and history in great detail, as well as taking lessons in royal etiquette. It had only been a week since her studies began, but Twilight was already very homesick and missed her friends terribly. She hadn’t been able to spend much time with them before they had to go back to Ponyville.
Celestia had given them a few days to spend with one another in Canterlot before she threw her favorite student headfirst into things, but once the lessons started, they had really hit the ground running. Twilight had no trouble adjusting to the workload; she had learned to handle heavy workloads back in school. The real problem was there wasn’t anything for her to do to help her relax when the day was done. True, she could go into the bustling city at the foot of the mountain, but Twilight would rather avoid being mobbed by the general populace. She had her books, as she always did, but since she met the five most amazing ponies in Equestria, even those had lost some of their appeal.
So the newly coronated princess had decided to fill her spare time researching and developing new spells. Though unsure if her endeavor would yield any results worth writing how about, Twilight desperately needed a distraction from her boredom. For the past three days, she had been trying to modify Princess Celestia’s teleportation spell to allow for instant travel to any destination. Even with her powerful magic, the sun monarch still experienced a delay ranging from a fraction of a second to nearly five seconds depending on the distance she had to travel. Twilight thought she might be able to perfect the spell with aid of her newfound power, but as stated in the tirade above, the spell, while successful, had only managed to spin her around 180 degrees and move her two inches forward instead of all the way to the courtyard.
“Twi, not add insult to injury here,” Spike stated, “but you already revolutionized the world of magic a week ago when you invented a spell that could change ponies’ destinies around! I don’t think anyone’s expecting you to perform another miracle like that so soon. I know you just want to keep yourself busy until you have a little more time to hang out with the others again, but at this rate you’re gonna burn yourself out!”
“You’re right,” Twilight sighed, “I guess got carried away…again.” The pair chuckled and embraced one another. “Hey,” Twilight said, releasing her assistant, “speaking of burning things, where’s my toast?”
“Your what?”
“You know, toast? Bread that you heat up until turns all dry and crunchy?”
“I know what it is,” Spike retorted, “What I want to know is why are you asking me?”
“Because I sent you down to get me some just before I cast the spell!” Twilight responded, “Wait a minute, how’d you get back here so quickly anyway? That was like, two seconds ago.”
“Twilight,” Spike inquired slowly, “how long have you been at this?”
“Apparently too long,” she answered, rubbing her right temple with her hoof. “I’ll just go down get breakfast myself. I’m going to be late for my first lesson today if I don’t hurry.”
“Okay, I’m going to try to squeeze in a little more sleep before breakfast. See you later!”
“See you after lunch, sleepyhead!” Twilight called back, gliding down to the floor below and exiting the room. She greeted the guards and servants she met on the way to the dining hall, wherein she found her mentor sitting at the table biting into a blueberry muffin.
“Good morning, Twilight!” Celestia greeted her cheerily, “How did last night’s experiment – oh…” The elder princess paused upon seeing Twilight’s exhausted expression, “Rough night, I take it?”
“You have no idea,” Twilight replied. She then related her tale as she buttered her toast and poured herself a glass of milk.
“Well, I believe Spike was right,” her teacher said once the story was concluded, “What you’re attempting is difficult even for Luna and myself. Perhaps you should search for another hobby. Besides, the spell did work, even if it wasn’t the way you intended.”
“Yeah, I guess so. Thanks, Celestia.”
“Of course. You shouldn’t push yourself so hard. This was supposed to help you relax after all. There's no reason for you to…” And Celestia paused again, “Twilight?”
“Mmmphf?” came the lavender alicorn’s reply as she dug in to her toast.
“What did you just call me?”
“Cwaweshtia.” Twilight quickly realized her faux pas and swallowed, “I mean ‘Celestia.’ Your name, of course. Or did you have it changed last night?” she answered with a cheeky grin.
“Twilight, are you sure you’re feeling okay?” Celestia asked apprehensively.
“Yeah, why? You’re acting like I’ve never called you that before.”
“You haven’t.”
“What are you talking about?” Twilight inquired somewhat irritably, “I’ve been calling you that all week! You told me I didn’t have to be formal with you anymore now that I’m I princess!”
“Yes, and you said you it still didn’t feel appropriate.”
“No that’s what I said when you told me to call by your name at the party after the we defeated Discord.”
“I never did that!”
“Oh, and I suppose next you’re going to tell me that you didn’t accidentally sing the happy birthday song to Twinkleshine at Moondancer’s fifteenth birthday party?”
___
“Now look, I don’t really see the need for all this!” Twilight exclaimed as an orange doctor with a light blue mane telekinetically strapped her down to the CAT scanner, “I’m fine!”
“No, Twilight, you are not.” Princess Celestia insisted, “That spell obviously has addled your brain somehow. Your memories are confused and you’re acting very strangely.”
“But my memory is fine!” Twilight responded as the table moved into the scanner, “I asked you to come to Moondancer’s fifteenth birthday party and sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to her because she said she always wanted to meet you! But when you showed up you sang to Twinkleshine by mistake! Don’t you remember?”
“No, because it didn’t happen.” Her teacher answered sternly. "Doctor Edelmane, how does she look?”
“We’ll know in a minute.” Answered the stallion. “But so far, everything appears normal.”
“That’s because I AM NORMAL!” Twilight shouted.
___
Meanwhile, back at Canterlot Castle:
“Horse apples!” Came the irritated cry of one Princess Twilight Sparkle. “That didn’t work at all! I’ve spent all night wasting my time!”
Author's Note
Hello, all! I am theblankbrony and I hope you all enjoy my first submission!
Chapter 2 - Neurosis
Twilight Sparkle collapsed in frustration. A whole night's worth of effort had gone unrewarded. No, more than that. She had spent all of her free time over the past four days working on this spell and had nothing to show for it! Twilight wasn't so arrogant as to think that she should be powerful enough to rewrite the very laws of nature whenever she pleased, but she mastered the time travel spell on her very first attempt! It literally took ten seconds!
Pushing herself up, she headed to the bathroom to go through her morning routine before she headed to breakfast. A few later, the dejected princess walked down the stairs to wake her assistant. "Spike! It's time to get - " but his bed was conspicuously empty. "Huh, I guess he's up already. Weird." That improbable occurrence aside, the purple alicorn exited her room and headed down to the dining hall. As she approached the bottom of the observatory's staircase, she heard someone coming up. That someone happened to be her number one assistant, bearing a plate of toast and orange juice.
"Twilight? What're you doing down here?" the young dragon inquired, "I said I'd get you breakfast."
"What? When? I haven't spoken to you at all this morning!"
"Yes, you have!" Spike protested, "You woke me up a few minutes ago and asked to bring you some breakfast because you skipped dinner last night!"
"I remember the part about skipping dinner," Twilight responded, "but I don't recall asking you to bring me breakfast."
"You really didn't get any sleep last night did you?"
"No, I didn't," Twilight sighed, "You can eat that Spike. I'll just go to the dining hall."
"Okay, thanks." Spike said, taking a bite of toast as he ascended the staircase. "See you this afternoon!"
Twilight, finally arriving at the dining hall, took her usual seat next to her mentor. "Good morning Twilight!" Princess Celestia greeted her, "How was your evening? Oh," she said, noting her student's haggard expression, "Rough night?"
"You have no idea," the younger princess replied, "I literally spent all night working just to move myself forward two inches! The only thing that happened was that I was facing the window instead of the door." She buttered a piece of toast and took a bite. "I didn't actually think I'd be able to make all the way to the city on my first go, but I expected more than that!"
"Don't be so hard on yourself, princess," Celestia consoled her, "You have done so many amazing things already. You shouldn't push yourself so hard. Besides," she continued, sipping her tea, "wasn't the point of this to help you relax in between you lessons?"
"Yes, but as I started making more progress, I got so excited." Twilight said, "But the worst thing is, the spell did work!"
"How is that a bad thing?"
"If it had just failed, that would've been one thing. But it worked, and all I did was move a few inches. That's the best I could manage!"
"That's probably just because you were so exhausted," Celestia advised, "Get a good night's sleep tonight and maybe you'll have more success tomorrow."
"You're probably right. I should at go over my notecards though, just in case I missed any - what's funny?" Twilight asked as her teacher choked on her tea from laughing too hard.
"I'm sorry," she answered, "but you haven't used note cards since your first year at my school! It reminded me of how obsessive you were over your studies back then!"
Twilight stared at her teacher in pure disbelief. "What're you talking about princess? I make note cards for everything! I always have!"
Celestia paused at this statement, "Are you feeling well, Twilight?"
"I'm fine. I should be asking you that question, princess."
'Something is definitely wrong here," the sun monarch thought, 'She's been calling me "Celestia" this whole week. And I'm positive she hasn't used notecards for anything in years.'
"Twilight, may I see your notecards please?" Celestia asked.
"I suppose," Twilight answered curiously, "Give me a moment." And with that, the young mare teleported up to her room. A moment later, an earsplitting scream echoed through the castle halls. Celestia quickly teleported to Twilight's room and was promptly hit in the head by an airborne copy of Hotfoot's Guide to Fire Magic. Twilight Sparkle was telekinetically throwing everything, literally everything, in her room in all directions.
"Wherearethey? Wherearethey? Wherearethey?" the purple princess frantically cried, "Where are they!?!?!"
"Princess Celestia!" Spike called from under the bed, "What the holy hayseed is going on?"
"I'm trying to find out, Spike." she responded, walking over to her manic pupil, who was currently searching through a box containing old photo albums. "Twilight," she whispered softly as she placed a hoof on her pupil's shoulder, "why don't come with me to the hospital. There's a neurologist there named Dr. Edlemane who I think should have a look at you."
"I think that may be a good idea, princess," Twilight said, "something's definitely not right here."
Author's Note
Sorry about the late update, everyone. I just suffered from a little writer's block...and forgetfulness...and laziness...and, um,...yeah.
Edit: i may go back at some point and add a few more paragraphs somewhere. i didn't realize how low the word count was on this one, but i didn't want to run the risk of this being reduced to a rehash of chapter one, which it essentially is anyway. the main point of this chapter was just to establish that canon Twilight was in another universe, and i didn't want to hammer that in too much. so look for that later. but for the moment, i need to think of ideas for chapter 3!
Chapter 3 – Well, Obviously!
Twilight Sparkle lay in the bed of the private room she was given wearing a very unladylike scowl on her face. Ordinarily, patients weren’t given their own rooms, but an exception was made due to her “delicate mental state.” That, of course, was absolutely ridiculous, since her mind wasn’t delicate, it was angry!
Why didn’t Princess Celestia remember Moondancer’s fifteenth birthday party, or any of Twilight’s for that matter? Where did Celestia get all of those notecards and checklists written in Twilight’s hornwriting? She hadn’t made a checklist or used a notecard in years! Celestia insisted they would jog her memory, but instead they just confused her even more!
And what about the photo albums? More than half of the pictures were missing! Where were all the pictures from the weekend she, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity spent in Baltimare last summer? Where were the pictures of that trip that Applejack and Fluttershy took with her when she went to Shallow Shades to study the increase in the salamander population? And why didn’t her friends remember any of those things?
Twilight had posed these questions to her friends half an hour ago when they arrived to check on her, having been informed of the situation by Celestia, but their only response was to stare at her nervously and tell her to get some rest. She didn’t need rest! She needed answers!
But, no; the lavender princess just lay in her bed, currently stripped of her royal regalia, brooding and pondering just what in the name of sanity was going on. Suddenly, her thoughts were interrupted by the squeaking of the hinges on the door to her bedroom opening. Nurse Tenderheart walked in pulling a lunch tray with her teeth. Also on the tray, Twilight couldn’t help but notice, was a small round container, which Twilight was sure contained sedatives.
“All right, princess,” she began, “I have a nice daffodil sandwich for you, with some fruit salad and some yummy peach yogurt.” The princess in question narrowed her eyes slightly. “Then I just want you take these pills in here,” Tenderheart continued, indicated the round container, “and they’ll help you relax, okay?”
“Okay, stop that.” Twilight demanded.
“Stop what?” Tenderheart inquired somewhat nervously.
“That condescending tone you’re using, that’s what!” the princess shouted angrily, standing up on her bed. “First of all, I am not crazy! Secondly, even if I was, I saved Ponyville from an Ursa Minor, I unlocked the power of the Elements of Harmony, and I mastered a spell that not even Starswirl could figure out. So my mental state aside – heck, my royal position aside – I think I deserve to be addressed with a little more respect than that!”
A now quite terrified Nurse Tenderheart quickly bowed and replied, “My apologies, your highness! I was just trying to do my job! I talk to everypony that way!”
The sight of the frightened nurse calmed Twilight down. “No, no, no.” she sighed, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have blown up like that.” The purple alicorn collapsed on her bed. “It’s just…this whole situation is so frustrating. I feel like the world’s out...of…wait a minute…”
“What is it, your highness?” Tenderheart asked.
“It couldn’t be, could it? No, of course not! Well, maybe…” Twilight continued to ramble, seemingly forgetting about Tenderheart’s presence. “It doesn’t make sense, though! Well, it kinda does, in theory. But then again it is just a theory. But that doesn’t mean it’s wrong, just…unproven. Could I have…? Nurse Tenderheart!” The young princess called to the nurse who was slowly backing out of the room, causing her to jump slightly. “If Princess Celestia or Doctor Edelmane drop by, tell them I'm heading out for a bit, but I'll be back in a few hours!” And with that, Twilight teleported away.
_____
"Any change from this morning, doctor?" asked Princess Celestia.
"I'm afraid not, your majesty." the unicorn stallion walking next to her replied, "The strange thing is, none of test indicated any sign of mental instability. And her family, with a few exceptions, it spotless in terms of mental health."
"You mentioned exceptions?" the sun princess inquired.
"Yes, two cases of schizophrenia." Edelmane replied, "But those were both several decades ago and years apart from one another. I'm afraid all of our data is simply inconclusive."
"And I have yet to discern who a teleportation spell could've caused this...whatever this is." Celestia sighed.
"We have an appointment with one of our therapists scheduled in about thirty minutes. You can visit her for a moment if you'd like." But before the princess could respond -
"Doctor! Princess!" came the cry of a blue-furred nurse down the hall, "She's gone! She just left! She teleported out of the room!"
"WHAT!?!?!" the addressees exclaimed.
"Princess Twilight...she just...she started rambling...then she was just gone! I'm sorry!" Nurse Tenderheart explained frantically.
"What did she say?" asked Celestia, "Did she tell you where she was going?"
"No, your majesty, only that she'd be back in a few hours."
Princess Celestia snorted in irritation. 'What else could possibly go wrong today?' she thought. Suddenly, in a burst of green flame, a letter appeared out of thin air. Grabbing with her magic, Celestia opened it and read the hastily written message.
Dear Princess Celestia,
Twilight was just here! She asked me a whole bunch of questions about her foalhood and ponies we knew when she was still in school. Then she told to go wait for her in her room at the hospital and she just took off! What do I do?
Yours faithful (and terrified) servant,
Spike
Sighing, Princess Celestia telekinetcally grabbed a pen from Doctor Edelmane's coat pocket and wrote the following note on the back of the letter:
Dear Spike,
For now we have no choice. Go to Luna and tell her to come to Twilight's hospital room the moment she's done with whatever business she's attending to at the moment. The other five element bearers will be here shortly.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
With that, Celestia sent the off, walked to Twilight's room, and sat on her haunches at the foot of her student's bed.
"Princess," came Nurse Tenderheart's voice, "what're you doing?"
"I'm waiting, nurse," Celesita answered, "Twilight's teleporting around Equestria and I have no idea where she is or where she's going. So, it seems I have no choice but to wait. If she is fine, as she continues to insist, then she's in no danger and is no danger to anypony. If she isn't stable at the moment, then chasing her down while she's in such a fragile state of mind could be dangerous, given her newfound powers as an alicorn."
"Do really believe that to be wise, princess?" inquired Doctor Edelmane.
"No, actually," she responded, staring blankly at the floor. "The voice of reason is currently standing right next to me screaming into my ear with a megaphone and truth be told the reasons I just gave were all a load of horseapples. I'm confused, a tad bit desperate, and I'm grasping at whatever options present themselves. So, for the moment, I'm just going to wait."
"Well, then," the doctor said as he and Nurse Tenderheart left the room, "just let me know if you need anything."
_____
Two hours later, Celestia was joined by her sister, Spike, and Twilight's friends as they all sat around Twilight's bed, anxiously awaiting her return. Suddenly, a flash of violet light filled the room as young alicorn made her return, reappearing on her bed.
"Ok, Twi," Applejack began, "ya'll have had us all worried sick for the past couple'a hours, so spill: what the hay have you been doin'?"
"Yeah," added Rainbow Dash, now hovering at eye level with her purple friend, "you just show up at my place outta nowhere and start asking me a bunch of questions about stuff we've done together since you moved to Ponyville, half of which I'm pretty sure didn't happen, and then you vamoose! Do you have amnesia or have you just lost it?"
"RAINBOW DASH!" Applejack shouted, "Now we talked about this! We said we were gonna her talk first!"
"Oh, yeah. Sorry," Dash mumbled meekly as she lowered herself to the ground again, "It's just...you're freaking us out, Twi. What's going on?"
"Indeed, darling," Rarity chimed in, "we've all been going mad with suspense. What have you been up to?"
“First of all, I'd like to apologize.” Twilight began, “I realize I may have given you all quite a shock today, and I'm sorry. I can understand that you were more than a little concerned when I suddenly started talking things that, from your perspective, never happened.”
“Our perspective?” Applejack inquired.
“Precisely, Applejack,” Twilight continued, “which brings me to my main point. I believe that the new teleportation spell I’ve been developing did work, just not in the way intended it to.” Everyone stared her with puzzled expressions. “I've been talking to my parents, my old classmates, several citizens of Ponyville, and of course, of all you. And none you seem to remember any of the things that I mentioned. So, there are three options: A) I have, in fact, lost all of my proverbial marbles. Princess Celestia, what did the doctor say?"
"That the results of your tests were inconclusive, but that you showed no sign of mental illness." Her mentor replied.
"Okay, that makes that scenario highly unlikely." Twilight said, "So that brings me to: B) all the other ponies in Equestria are suffering from the most widespread and specific case of amnesia in recorded history. Again, highly unlikely. So that brings me to my final scenario. The lavender princess paused here. "Now everypony just go with me for a second. There is a theory that states that we all exist in a multiverse. That is, a plane of reality where an infinite number of alternate universes exist. Some very similar, so unimaginably different. So option "C" is -"
“Ooh, ooh, ooh! I know, I know!” Pinkie Pie interjected. “Somewhere out there in the multiverse, there’s a universe that’s almost exactly like ours…exceeeeept the Twilight from that universe did a whole bunch of things that ours didn’t which created a point in the time/space continuum where our two timelines diverged. Buuuuuut, aside from that teeeeeeeeeny little difference, our two universes are almost identical, meaning the boundary between them is super-duper-looper thin. The two have all the same ponies, are the same size, and time flows at the same rate! So, since Twilight’s teleportation spell works by warping space and time in an isolated area, the two Twilight’s in each universe, using the same spell at the same time in the same place, created a bridge between our worlds and they switched places! AmIright? AmIright? Huh? Huh? Am I?”
“Uh, yes, actually.” Twilight answered incredulously. “Well, there you all go. That’s the story.”
"Twilight," Princess Celestia stated, "While I will agree that theory has some logic to it, it seems to be just as unlikely as the other two. What other evidence do you have?"
“I'm glad you asked, Celestia,” Twilight replied as her horn began to glow, “I’ve concluded that there is only one way to prove I'm perfectly sane!"
“Twilight Sparkle!” the sun princess exclaimed, “I forbid you!” Celestia fired a thin yellow bolt that contained the magic for a sleeping spell at her student, but it ricocheted into the ceiling and dissipated when it came within a foot of her.
“Like the invisible barrier?” the purple mare asked, her horn glowing brighter, “I cast the spell just a split second after I teleported in.”
“Twilight Sparkle, think about this! What if you're wrong, and the spell did affect your mind? This could make it worse!” But Twilight's horn only glowed brighter. “Twilight, are you…ignoring me?” the tall alicorn asked disbelievingly. Then something incredible happened – Twilight turned to her…and smirked! And still the glow of her horn intensified, and the light at the tip of her horn finally burst, once again filling the room with a brilliant purple light.
Celestia’s amazement at her pupil’s defiance was replaced by utter stupification at the sight before her. There on Twilight’s bed, were the young mare had been just a moment ago, stood an exact replica of herself! "Well," the doppelgänger stated slowly, "This was certainly unexpected."
Author's Note
All right! i am VERY satisfied with how things turned out with this one. and in the next chapter: the tumble down the rabbit hole TRUELY begins! stayed tuned, everyone!
EDIT: ooookay, so that didn't go over as well as i'd hoped. i hope you all like this updated version better.
