The Lucas Chronicles #6: Spanning the Generations
Hello. My name is Lucas. First thing I should make note of, I'm a human living in the 'magical' world of Equestria. How I got here, however, is an entirely different story for another day. But since you're here, I'm assuming you've heard of the Television show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Yeah, they don't role the cameras when I'm around, and when I am around and they desperately want a certain moment, they tell me to basically sit in a corner and be quiet, just because I'm a human. Bull crap, I know, but what can ya do? I should probably also note that the one known as Twilight Sparkle has allowed me to live in her tree library with her for the time being. Anyway, lots of funny stuff happens between the 'Mane 6', as I remember the Internet used to call them, and myself when the cameras are not rolling. This is one of those times... Of course, I wasn't actually there for this one, and from what I gathered, thank the Maker. It sounded like a horrible experience.
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"Holy crap!" Derpy yelled at the TV screen. We were playing Terraria. "Lucas, save me- Aaahhh!" The words, 'Whoov3zOfD3rp had their flesh ripped from their bone by a corrupt bunny' displayed on the screen. "Aw..." Derpy glumly said.
"At least you weren't eviscerated by a pixie." Ben commented.
"We should probably make you a lightsaber so you can fight better-" I started.
Isaac interrupted, "No. She should work for her equipment like all of us had to. We already gave her a Magic Mirror and a Grappling Hook."
I conceded as Jeremy spoke, "So, guys, how do you think Halo 5 will leave us wanting to play Halo 6? I speculate that-"
Twilight interrupted, "Shh! I need the utmost focus for this spell! If it works, we should be able to withstand the changeling invasion. Everypony ready?" All of Twilight's friends had gathered in the center of her library. She started up her magic, and there was a bright, white flash.
Immediately, I checked to see if I was in my own body. Sure enough, I was, unlike the last time that happened, definitely in my own body. I don't think Cloudsdale ever even recovered from that incident. Look on the bright side: No more deaths in the Rainbow Factory. That's a plus. And the weather feels more like earth's now.
But I digress. I checked on Twilght and her friends, and to my partial surprise, only Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity remained. "What happened to Twilight, Pinkie, and Rainbow Dash?" Derpy asked.
I replied, "I assume, by the nature of the spell, they were sent to a different dimension. I'm sure they'll be okay."
"You do know those are some famous last words, right?" Ben spoke. "Right behind, 'I'm pretty sure I can make this jump'."
I shrugged as Derpy continued to ask, "Shouldn't you bring them back with that Chaos Control thing of yours?"
"Agh!" I complained. "That requires effort! Maybe later. Right now, we still have to survive that Blood Moon." She shrugged and we started playing Terraria again.
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"Ow... My head..." Rainbow Dash said as she rubbed her head with her hoof as her friends, Twilight and Pinkie Pie did the same.
"Where are we?" Pinkie asked. "It seems strangely familiar..."
Twilight responded, "I don't know, but something must have gone wrong with the spell..."
"No duh!" Dash mocked. "Your spells always seem to go wrong!"
"Hey!" Twilight exclaimed. "Not my fault! I'm totally stressing out over the imminent changeling threat! My spells don't really go over so well if I'm a little over stressed..."
"Whatever you say, egghead." Dash shrugged. "Now, where are we? And why don't you just use your magic to send us home?"
Twilight responded, "That spell took a lot of energy. Plus, in order to transport us to somewhere, I need a relative point from which I start. As for the place..."
Pinkie interrupted. "It looks like Ponyville, but it looks like it was made to appeal to young fillies."
"Hello!" A voice spoke to them from behind. They turned to see a cyan pony with a rainbow mane and tail, but it looked- how should I put this- ...disfigured from the ponies from Equestria. "You must be new ponies. Welcome to Ponyville! My name is Rainbow Dash!"
"...WHAT." The Equestrian Rainbow Dash said shortly. The three friends from Equestria were shocked, until the Equestrian Rainbow Dash spoke again, "Dear Celestia, you've got to be freaking kidding me...Guys, we gotta leave before I do something I'm gonna regret."
Twilight had her two friends huddle and whispered, "I think I may have sent us to an alternate dimension-"
"Ya think?!?" Dash interrupted quietly.
Twilight continued, "-and it looks like we have counterparts in this dimension. We should probably go by different names here." They all agreed. Twilight turned and spoke to the other Rainbow Dash, "Um, yes, my name is-" she paused slightly to think, "-Jeremy."
Dash spoke next, "I'm Isaac."
Pinkie spoke third, with a smile as wide as a mile. "My name is Ben!"
"Those are all odd names for ponies," the other Rainbow Dash spoke. "but we never exclude anyone from the wonders of friendship!" The pain on Dash's face was evident. She never would've said it like that, if at all! She spoke again, "I like to paint rainbows and dance ballé! What do you like to do?"
With that, Dash walked over to the nearest wall and bashed her head into it multiple times. Pinkie came and stopped her. Her forehead was red, and there was a hole in the wall where she was bashing. They returned to Twilight and the other Rainbow Dash.
The other Rainbow Dash spoke to Dash, "Oooh! Your rainbow mane is so pretty!" She began to touch it. "We could definitely do something to it! Maybe we could curl it! Oh, but first, we must fix it's ratty look."
Dash spoke, rage building. "I swear to Celestia, Twilight, I swear to Celestia..."
"Keep your cool, Isaac. We can do this." Twilight said.
"I thought your name was Jeremy. Did she just call you Twilight? Because I have a friend named Twilight Sparkle!" The other Rainbow Dash exclaimed.
"Oh, Twilight, Jeremy, they're interchangeable!" She laughed nervously then said under her breath, "I pray to Celestia AND to Lucas' God that I never meet your Twilight..."
Dash finally pushed the other Rainbow Dash's hoof out of her mane. "Stop doing that! I need to keep up my racing image."
"Ew." The other Rainbow Dash said. "Racing is for boys, and boys have cooties. Your not a boy, are you?"
Pinkie facehoofed and Twilight whispered, "Crap. This is bad." They knew how Dash was going to react, so she and Pinkie grabbed her and held her down. She struggled while yelling things that I, as a Christian, won't repeat to the general public. It was pretty bad. Pinkie grunted and said, "So,- ugh- do you like parties?"
"Oh yes!" The other Rainbow Dash exclaimed. "My friend Pinkie Pie throws the most delightful tea parties!"
Pinkie spoke more, "But what about- oh no you don't! Not until you calm down!- what about regular parties with a DJ, music, soda pop and all the fixens?"
The other Rainbow Dash shook her head, "Oh no. Only boys do that."
Pinkie's mane and tail deflated as she let go of Dash.
"BEN!" Twilight shouted, "I need you!"
Pinkie brandished a kitchen knife. "Hey, Rainbow Dash was it? Would you like to help me make some... Cupcakes?" She smiled this extremely creepy smile and twitched.
Dash, seeing what was about to happen, calmly got up and stopped Pinkie from doing something horrible. Pinkie sheathed the kitchen knife and looked at the ground.
"Hey," the other Rainbow Dash said, "do you guys wanna see how rainbows are born?"
Dash answered, "Um, rainbows aren't 'born'. They are made from-"
"Isaac!" Twilight said as she quickly shook her head. She knew this story was to gruesome for the other Rainbow Dash.
"Never mind..." She said.
"Oh boy!" The other Rainbow Dash exclaimed. She ran off and began a musical number, explaining how rainbows are born. Dash picked up a large rock and placed it into Pinkie's hoof.
"What's this?" Pinkie asked.
"Big rock." Dash sniffed.
"What for?" Pinkie questioned further.
"KILL ME." Dash said painfully.
"I'm not going to kill you with this big rock, Dashie." Pinkie said as she threw it on the ground. But she hit Dash's hoof.
"Aye-eeeee! Yep, it's definitely broken now!" Dash screeched in pain.
"I'm so sorry, Dashie! It slipped!" Pinkie apologized.
"Girls!" Twilight shouted, "keep yourselves together!"
As the other Rainbow Dash continued the musical number, Dash walked back over to the nearest wall, bashed her head, and said repeatedly, "I hate my life. I hate my life. I hate my life. I hate my life. I hate my life."
Twilight sighed. "I'm sure we'll find a way home soon..."
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"Yeah!" I exclaimed. "Full house!" It had begun to rain back at the tree library almost immediately after Twilight, Rainbow, and Pinkie disappeared, so the remaining ponies stayed and played poker with Derpy, my earth friends and myself.
Jeremy interrupted my victory excitement, "Lucas, we're playing Go Fish."
"Oh." I sat back down, disappointed.
Derpy spoke. "Hey, Lucas, shouldn't you try to bring Twilight back now?"
"Agh!" I complained. "Fine!" I readied my Chaos Emerald and said, "Chaos Control!" A portal opened to another dimension, just like I expected. I thought I even saw Twilight. "Twilight?" I asked.
"Lucas?!?" She shouted, surprised. "Rainbow, Pinkie, come on! Lucas found us!" After they walked through the portal, it shut behind them and she said, "Lucas, you don't know how glad we are to see you-"
"What is this fantabulously pretty place?" A voice spoke. It was the other Rainbow Dash.
Twilight's, Rainbow's, and Pinkie's jaw dropped as well as the jaws of my human friends and myself, except ours came with an angry scowl on our eyebrows, and a noise similar to that of a screaming banshee. Derpy and the other ponies just looked confused.
"NO! NONONO! NO!" Dash shouted as she flew out a window.
"Kill it with fire!" Ben shouted. Isaac grabbed one of Derpy's pistols and shot the other Rainbow Dash in the stomach. Ben ran up to it and kicked it into the air, performing a large combination of attacks with his Keyblades.
"PULL!" Jeremy shouted. Ben pulled back his attacks and Jeremy shot it with his shotgun. Isaac threw his disc thingy, which we came to know that it was called a Disc of Light, and it decapitated the other Rainbow Dash. As it fell, I grabbed my Chaos Emerald and said as I began to glow red, "CHAOS..." Everyone dove for cover. "BLAST!" I yelled. As the wave flowed over the body, it disintegrated. "What the heck is going on?" I asked.
"Well, um..." Twilight started as she explained everything that happened.
"Sounds like an invitation to a crazy carnival." Derpy said.
"Well, we're back!" Twilight said, "And I'll make sure we never go back to that horrid dimension."
"How bad was it?" I asked.
"You don't wanna know. Wait, could've you brought us back anytime?!?"
I replied. "Yeah, but I was too lazy."
"WHAT?!?" Rainbow Dash came back though the window and stood in between Twilight and Pinkie, all of whom are ticked. That was probably not the smartest thing for me to say.
I should probably start running now.
THE END