She darted out of the window, flying like a javelin forcefully propelled in the air. She reached her limit, the breaking point. Multiple factors determined her improvised decision: not only the annoyance of the elevated temperature in the room, but the presence of her older sister. Even if they cared and trusted each other like mother and son, and their bond was so deep that no imaginable force, physical or psychological, could have ever broken it, though small fights and conflicts still took place between them from time to time.
The thought of her sister, in that precise moment and situation, tensed all of her muscles. She was in the middle of a emotional conflict with her, and she decided the best choice was to momentarily flee from the battlefield, and organize her plans better. Those moments in which she meditated by herself, immersed in her world, often resolved her conflicts. She would apologize with her sister, recognize how pointless and useless her actions were, and eventually everything would have returned to normality.
She furiously flew, gradually slowing down over time, as the distance from her bedroom increased. She noticed, with the corner of the eye, a faint light which starkly contrasted with the night, in the park she was currently flying over. Around it, two blots of color, one blue, one red, darted by. Even if that detail caught her attention, she didn’t mind to turn back. Until she reached the most lonely place she could think of, the mountains.
As she slowly hovered over the naked rock and the thick bushes, that occasionally delimited a small patch of thickly concentrated trees, she observed the scenario that unfolded below her, the alternation of the various elements, the patterns of colors that swirled, mixed, clashed and repeated themselves in the beautiful mosaic created by nature.
The night, even if much calmer than the day, was not completely silent. Some noises could still be heard. The peaceful texture of the soft nocturnal sounds, mixed with silence, fully calmed Luna’s mind, who proceeded to shift all her attention to her inner self only.
She entered a trance-like state of mind, and started to think about what bothered her the most. She started from what she reputed the most likely of options: her sister. Certain of the fact the figure of her sister was the reason of her bitter anger, she couldn’t figure what specific aspect caused the separation and rivalry. She pondered the question a while, and then convinced herself that the reason could be only one.
Celestia’s rigid overprotectiveness, both in regards of her sister, and her subjects.
The older sibling was afraid that Luna’s heart could have been corrupted once again, and thus decided to protect her by isolating her from her main duty. She took care of all the day-to-night transitions by herself, a small burden. She rendered her sister less likely to be influenced by power, and thus kept her safe from the return of her nemesis, but also deprived her of what characterized her. If she couldn’t manipulate the Moon anymore, what kind of princess of the night was she?
Luna wasn’t given the benefit of trust, from anyone. She was isolated, respected as a figure, as part of the royal family, but actually, her living being dignity was respected from no one.
She had no more reason to exist, as her sister could fulfill the roles which once belonged to her, flawlessly. The thought of such freedom, being lifted from any burden, knowing that someone else would have done it, the privilege of no responsibilities, produced no emotional response. She remained completely apathetic to the realization, as it was worth nothing to her mind.
Since no one recognized her, she arrived to the conclusion she was dead, a bodyless soul, trapped in a world of souls, trapped in warm bodies.
Despair was not an option, as any other emotion wouldn’t have been. Emotions don’t belong to spirits, but to mortals. She had to wander, apathetically, and patiently wait, till the death of her physical body, the only others were able to recognize.
Slowly, as she abandoned the trance state, she noticed that a pleasing sound was growing in intensity. A sweet voice was singing.
Luna spent a few minutes trying to locate the source of the singer, roaming over the vacuous space below, seemingly devoid of life, her ears perked up. After a few minutes of research, she landed on a flat, grassy area, filled with trees, in which the voice could be heard the strongest. She raised her head, and let the ears guide her again, this time through the darkness and the trunks. Even if she’d have gladly flown away from the unsafe wilderness, even if that meant returning to the suffocating presence of her sister, the curiosity to know who, or what, was singing, prevented her to escape back to their home. She was completely concentrated on that voice, and fear wasn’t thus able to obtain a firm grip on Luna’s mind.
Suddenly, as she kept walking forward, the trees around her disappeared, revealing a small, short hill not too far away from where she was standing. The echo of the singing reached her, after having bounced against the natural wall formed by the trees which surrounded the hill. She trembled in hesitation, maybe even a bit of fear.
For a moment, she thought of flying away, as she was afraid to meet the mysterious singer. She backed a few steps, but then convinced herself that she shouldn’t had left. She came all the way here for nothing?
After taking a deep breath, she turned her head towards the summit of the small mount, and hastily began to walk, to find the solution to her doubt.
The Changeling felt a new presence around her, and interrupted her singing. She quickly turned her head around, piercing the dark environments with her probing glare, but when she noticed a dark body moving towards her, she shrieked.
“Pity me, whoever you are!”, she yelled. A Queen should have never said such a thing, but she was a one only by name and chance.
“I mean no harm,” Luna replied. “Was the voice I heard earlier yours?”
Luna raised her glare to meet the singer’s eye level. Their line of sight collided in mid air, and both proceeded to analyze the other.
Luna had never seen such a creature before. At first, it resembled another pony, roughly her size, for the shape of the body. But, after a more intent examination, she determined that she wasn’t in company of a exemplar of her species.
First of all, the body was completely black, and reflected the moonlight like a lucid surface. The trace left by the passage of the light was a irregular series of shapes, distributed over the body, from which the rays departed from, towards a new direction different than the original.
The numerous holes in her slender, frail legs, contributed to giving the creature a more fragile aspect, which reinforced the initial idea in Luna’s mind that generated from the plead Chrysalis pronounced seconds earlier.
Rising up, the next peculiar feature was the head. Luna immediately recognized the presence of undoubtably feminine traits, such as the long hair. Two sharp, small fangs terminated the sides of her mouth, surmounted by two deep, large eyes. Both irises were acid green in color, which, along with the fangs resulted in a set of features meant to be intimidating. But their effect was nullified by the slight trembling of her body, in all the length. Rather than being intimidating, they radiated adorableness.
The last feature worth noting aside from the wings, was a feature which Luna couldn’t understand the function of, a the set of undulating, thick stripes located around her waist. She assumed it was a mean to give more mobility and flexibility to her seemingly rigid body, probably an exoskeleton.
Chrysalis already knew how Luna looked like. She was already aware of her introvert personality, of her burning desire of being accepted. She knew everything about her, as she carefully read all the reports that her subjects wrote about ponies. They covered most aspects of their society, mainly focussing on the exploitable weak links found in their organization.
She never kept them, though. The Queen always burned the reports, fearing they could have ended into anyone else’s possession, to destroy every last page of tactical advantage over ponies. That knowledge would have died with her.
“Yes, it was my voice,” she replied to the question. She stopped for a moment, and her mind noticed one small detail that always happened, without fault. “Strange, you aren’t rejecting me, running away. Why don’t you fear me?” Chrysalis asked.
“I could ask the same. Why aren’t you escaping away from me, fearing my heart may be still corrupted by the presence of Nightmare Moon, pleading not to attack or devour you?”
“Why should I fear you? You don’t seem a threat... You don’t have fangs, holes in your body, acid-green eyes. Your aspect is as peaceful as your realm, the night. Instead, look at me. I’m practically an insect, a nuisance, to be avoided and hated. The only who accept me are my family, the Changelings. Without them, I’m terribly lonely. Everyone else fears me, I can’t approach anyone...”
Luna winced, as the same words applied perfectly to her. Apart from her sister, she was terribly alone in the outside world, because everyone else felt uneasy around her. She was afraid of appearing in public, as she knew what others’ reaction would have consisted in. She couldn’t stand the feeling, of being a psychological burden rather than company. And, the few friends she made during the best night of her life either lived too far away, or were always busy in something, to meet her.
“You know, at times I feel I have no use, that I don’t need to exist, because I could be easily replaced by another changeling. If a leader is missing in the group, the hivemind shared among them will elect one, make him conscious, awaken the dormant senses. Creativity, critical thought, and the ability to formulate questions, to realize that others may know what one doesn’t, they all spark into the new leader’s mind.”
She paused, and sighed. Luna observed the reflection of the moon, which appeared slightly blurred, but still brightly gleaming, on the Queen’s polished exoskeleton. A soft gust of cold wind insinuated the green locks of hair, which lazily moved back and forth, letting the natural, uncontrolled forces overcome them.
“Why am I telling you those things...”
Chrysalis was not regretful; rather, she expressed a genuine doubt. She found no real reason to be talking to Luna, as she found no real reason to exist herself. Except for a desire caused by her generosity, which was a trait no other changeling possessed.
Luna was dumbfounded at the unexpected question. She felt the need to answer it, to comfort that tormented spirit, which reminded so much of her, somehow. Taking a step forward, coming closer to her interlocutor, she asked the first question that seemed logical to ask. She needed something to begin the discussion. “I promise I won’t tell you, nor anyone else, about what you are telling me. But, tell me, why are you outside, still awaken, even this late at night?”
Chrysalis smiled, at the sincerity of the Princess. “I just can’t sleep. Too many thoughts are on my mind, and I’m torn apart by them.”
She paused.
“I am generally too trusting of others. This is probably my greatest weakness as a leader, aside from being too merciful, not vicious enough. I, I don’t think I should really remain as a ruler. I might as well abandon my subjects, for I’m sure anyone would be better than me. What prevents me to is the fear that innocents may get hurt from my decision. Probably, this is the only reason for which I’m still fighting against my depraved desire to resign. Are you wondering why I’m telling you so much about me? Because I don’t care anymore. I’m tired of being the Queen... I can’t stand it any longer. Self-awareness comes with a price. All of a sudden you are in charge, you realize your real nature, you aren’t the ruler’s puppet anymore. You became the ruler yourself.”
Luna’s eyes widened in pure admiration. She had seen the sufference in her eyes, a sufference not even the best actor could have replicated. The Queen’s sorrow was sincere, heartfelt. She needed to comfort her, even if she blurted a lie only to mask reality. Lying, compared to her suffering, was nothing.
“What do you desire?” she asked, as she came closer.
Chrysalis smiled, as she found most of the ways to formulate her reply simply too silly and childish. Finally, after long moments of silence which seemed hours to both of them, she found the force to let the two words out of her mind.
“Your company. It’s comforting, I don’t feel alone anymore. Will you stay with me a little? I won’t force you against your will, you may go anytime. It’s just... That I’d love to stay with you, that’s all.”
As she pronounced those last sentences, she started to move her leg over the ground, creating an invisible circular trajectory over the grass that surrounded her, as if that motion permitted her to discharge the excruciating anxiety.
Luna’s reply consisted in more steps, which brought her closer to the changeling, and a softly spoken “I’ll stay.”
Chrysalis, not interrupting her activity, but visibly augmenting the pace, asked another question.
“Do you trust me?”
The outcome would have determined either her extreme joy or the permanence into a state of discomfort and worry.
Luna, faced with such a direct question, took a little to think of an accurate reply. She could trust and relate to a few elements about Chrysalis: her suffering, plus the reasons behind it. But, a sudden burst of logical reasoning, which overcame the feeling of emphaty, poisoned her mind with doubt.
“I can trust you if you said that you are suffering... But, I can’t trust you in the rest.”
“That’s up to you to decide. Do you think I am worthy of your trust? Or you fear I may betray you? I am not trying to emotionally blackmail you with regret, or bend your thoughts according to my will, I am exposing the mere truth as it is.”
She stopped dragging her hoof over the ground to create circles, and retracted the leg back to the position it was in before. Then, she glazed at Luna, her vivid green eyes burning of desire to know her answer, her ideas, what she thought of her. She wanted the truth.
Luna decided to begin her leap of faith. She mentally prepared herself, her mind performed a small run-up.
“I...”
And then jumped, pushing with all the force that was hidden within her imposing, but fragile body, leaving her fears behind, her mind’s eyes closed. She thought blindly following her heart would have headed her towards hope.
“...I trust you.”
“Are you sure?” Chrysalis asked, afraid it was a lie. She couldn’t believe the fact any other sentient creature that was not a changeling, pushed itself where no one had ever been before. “Are you really that trusting of me, even given my aspect and nature?”
Luna smiled, and slowly walked the last steps that separated her from her worried interlocutor, so that she could gently stand right next to her. “I am. To love, and thus open ourselves, we must trust the other first, don’t we?”
Chrysalis slowly lowered her head, careful not to hurt her companion with her jagged horn, and then let it rest on Luna’s shoulder. A soft weeping commenced, and a few tears wet the mare’s coat.
“May I know your name?” Luna asked, after Chrysalis stopped crying, interested in knowing the Queen better.
“I am Chrysalis, current Queen of the Changelings.”
“Changelings?”
“We are shapeshifters, and we... feed on love. That’s what I meant by ’nature’.” Chrysalis always desired to be extremely direct, to never leave the core of the argument untouched for too long when talking about herself, or her kind. She never tried to sugarcoat the truth, or to alter it in any way, and preferred giving the most objective response possible. As a ruler, she was aware of her possibility to deceive and lie, and even control minds. But, as she demonstrated earlier to Luna, her method of choice was letting others take their decisions with as less interferences as possible.
Chrysalis, because of Luna’s close presence, had one objective in mind. To accomplish it, though, she had to walk down the path of brutal honesty.
“I know, this may be an inopportune question, but why, or how, you know so much about me?”
Chrysalis lifted her head from Luna’s shoulder. “I doubt you’ll like the truth... Do you want to know it anyway?”
“Yes.” Her voice was firm, serious.
“We were gathering intelligence
Luna didn’t remain hurt by Chrysalis’ confessions. She instantly forgave the Queen, who never ceased to amaze her.
Being observed and spied was disturbing in itself, and the fact it was being done to gather intelligence for an invasion made it only worse; But, the invasion was motivated. They were starving, and every living being has the right to live. Sadly, often an advantage for one means a loss for another, and this was the case. To this point, the invasion could have been justified, but it’d still have been a great toll for one population.
Chrysalis’ act was of betrayal. A complete Judas to her subjects, she exposed their plan to the designated victims. Now, without the element of surprise, the victory wasn’t a certainty. They’d have been fought, suppressed, obliterated by yet another population. What was worse, was that she was risking everything, by exposing their plan. If Luna didn’t accept, she’d have been the only one responsible for the destiny of her subjects.
But, Luna saw a deeper meaning to her act. She saw trust in her, and hope for a better future. Those two elements were her two of her deeper desires she longed for, which she stupidly tried not to fulfill. She was blinding herself, but Chrysalis prevented her from completely closing her eyes. She offered her an opportunity to escape from pessimism, depression, and return to positivity.
Luna couldn’t do anything to her companion, but thank and love her. A confession that would have angered most, completely calmed Luna, who now completely trusted the Queen.
She paused. “Violence has never solved anything, and never will. I tried to reason with them, as in our society any decision is to be discussed with the ruler, who has the final word on any matter, but the resistance I met was outstanding. They insisted in following their primal instincts, even managed to slip just past my will at times. I could contrast their idea, and keep denying their deranged proposals. But my forces slowly faded, day after day. The Changelings’ ruler is in control of the subjects via mind control, but if a ruler is weak, then the hivemind will take control over him. The Changelings were hungry, and the only solution possible was to invade your cities, as we had already been banned, or encountered strong military forces in any other place. You, ponies, are so open and vulnerable... It’d be a blitzkrieg. Came, saw, conquered. But, I don’t want that. One of these day I’d have broken, under the pressure. They’d have overwhelmed and controlled me, subjugating my will to theirs.”
Another pause. “I can only choose between no invasion, and my starving subjects, and the invasion, the horde, the nonsense violence, the hate, the, the...”
Her words faded away, as she couldn’t continue the sentence. The words and concepts were too heinous for her mouth to pronounce them.
“There’s no solution that can save both parties, without sacrificing one at the expense of the other. I don’t know what to do anymore, but I don’t want to abandon my position. If I did, the violence I disdain so much would take place. I prefer taking time, waiting—even if that means a suffering for my subjects—than immediately acting, or even worse, letting others act, and causing a far greater suffering to your kind. You don’t deserve... Slavery, or a war. Because I’m sure the Changelings would do that.”
When she concluded her monologue, Luna remained astonished by what she heard. The courage, strength, and generosity of the Queen were unbelievable. She couldn’t help, but admire her even more. Except for her last decision.
“Is it right to judge using the facts that belong to the past?” Luna bursted, her heart burning with passion. “No one deserves to suffer. Not my kind, nor yours. We aren’t as good as you think. I feel useless because I’m ignored. They recognize only my title, but they don’t imagine what feelings lie below the fur and flesh. Or, if they do, they plainly ignore me. They’re selfish, mean, arrogant. There have been moments in our history where we showed our negative side. Civil wars were fought, just for food, to nourish. If we want to judge our kinds on the past happenings, fine, be it. But, in this case, we’d both deserve to suffer, don’t you think?”
Chrysalis nodded in response to the question.
“But, what if we don’t punish anyone? We look past what we’ve done, and to the present, to what we can do? What a cooperation might bring us in the future? Past is past, it can’t be changed, but for one reason: so that we can learn from our errors. They’ll always remain as a incorruptible reference, to guide us in our lives. What’s the first problem? We fought, because of differences. That damaged us. But, if that was an error, then the opposite, comprehension and understanding will be a righteous act. Thus, we won’t invade or attack each other, agreed?”
Chrysalis cheerfully smiled, as the other party proposed what she desired the most. With the moral support that was given by her friendship with Luna, she was once again motivated to lead the fight against her subjects’ feral and selfish instincts.
“Agreed!”, she replied.
“But, the problem of feeding your subjects remains...” Her voice trailed off, as the seemingly unsolvable problem interrupted her reasoning. Her mind became numb, as it all came to an abrupt end. There was no way to avoid that point, it had to be faced somehow.
Chrysalis, instead, felt her mind was being completely dominated by joy; it acted as a drug, fogging her logic reasoning, and intensifying all the senses.
She was too emotionally altered to think about the effect her words could have produced. But, after all, she already opened herself to Luna. She was sure the princess of the night wouldn’t have betrayed or lied to her, that certitude given by the knowledge of her character, gathered by the Changelings over time.
“It won’t, at one condition... The ruler can feed its subjects directly. I didn’t, because I had no love to give, only dispair. I feel at peace with you, and I love your company. You listened to my lament, you even comforted me... I’d love you to be my friend, not only to feed my subjects.”
“Friend?”
Luna was in awe, after hearing such a word. She had... No friends. Her sister didn’t count. And she didn’t know anyone else deeply enough to be graced with the title of friend. She couldn’t imagine how, in the limited time span of one night, she could have encountered another ruler, who, not afraid of her, proceeded to lament her griefs, trusting a practically complete stranger. And, even have the courage to ask for friendship.
“Yes! Friends! Reciprocal love! This not only will allow us to avoid the invasion, but we’ll also become each other’s strength, we’ll help the other in the moment of need, and...”
Her voice trailed off, to conceal her next, childish idea, “...have fun together.”
Even if she proposed to begin their friendship, and was sure that Luna would’ve agreed, even if this would’ve caused them to cease to fear judgments, she was still reluctant to show that side of her, which had been repressed for so long. Accessing it again felt almost wrong. Unusual, strange. Deep down, she never grew up. She always tried, or pretended, to find good, positivity, innocence, chastity, and the purity of the newborns in others. Her ideas often didn’t correspond to reality, but that didn’t stop her from dreaming and hoping.
Chrysalis reassured herself by thinking how the proposal of friendship was the next logical step. They knew each other, Chrysalis’ trust was solid, and both were in desperate need of someone to share their pain with.
“I’ve... Never had a friend before. I don’t know if I even deserve one... What if I end up hurting you? Why are you even proposing me that, what’s so special about me, that others cannot see?”
Chrysalis smiled. “The simple fact you are yourself. You’re so unique, don’t you realize it? I love your complexity, and many aspects of you. That’s why I asked you to stay. I wanted to know you better, meet you in person, rather than read reports about you. I can, and do relate to your suffering, and I think you can do the same. I just love you as a whole, that’s all. I cannot explain love, even though I feed on it, just like you cannot explain the food you eat. Maybe I want to defend you, or find a method to soothe our pain. I don’t know the precise reason for which I want to befriend you, I just do.”
Closing her eyes, the Queen tightly embraced her first friend. Luna, surprised by the act, awkwardly joined the hug at first, almost fearing it. But then, after breaking all resistances, she stretched her legs behind her Chrysalis’ back, adjusting them in the right position to be bent to pull the friend even closer.
Luna’s waving hair, which at first moved convulsively, slowed down its pace to a moderate ripple traversing the whole length every half a minute. Slowly, the end tip raised, and formed a full circle around them, wrapping the two below the glimmering layers and stripes of the fluid hair.
Their bodies remained glued one to the other, the force of sincere love kept them attached, as they stood in nearly perfect stasis until they lost cognition of time.
Chrysalis never received any manifestations of corporal affection, but she read many books which included them. She always wondered how it would have felt to be loved, hugged, patted on the head, kissed on the cheek. But, as she was given the prestigious title of ruler, she couldn’t think about such trivial matters. Her task was helping her subjects to steal love. They never thought about the possibility of earning it, stealing was easier, almost more satisfying. Unlike other rulers, though, she was different, more sensitive, and less feral. almost motherly. She courageously stood up against the traditions, and stubbornly refused violence. Her resistance had been rewarded, as she finally had the friend she dreamed of. Luna was real, and they were hugging. She had fulfilled her greatest desire, being able to feed on love, having honestly earned it after having exposed her true self, instead of having deceived and stolen.
The two exchanged a last look.
“Will we ever meet again?” Chrysalis asked, almost in fear of losing her only friend. It couldn’t have lasted just one night. She wanted more, more time. More happiness. More Luna.
“We will, I promise. Tomorrow.”
Chrysalis’ heart fluttered in her chest, almost skipping a beat for the joy such a simple statement infused her soul with.
“Thank you,” she whispered, her voice muffled by emotions once again.
Author's Note
I freaking hate indenting. It always breaks, outside of Google Docs. :\
Meh, at least I've updated it... As I promised. :3
